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Speaker 1: How do you get your kids into a good sleep routine?

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Speaker 2: We'll tell you the one thing, the one thing that

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Speaker 2: makes the biggest difference today. Welcome to the Happy Families Podcast,

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Speaker 2: Real parenting Solutions every day on Australia's most downloaded parenting

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Speaker 2: podcast with Me, Justin and you Kylie calls them.

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Speaker 3: All week, we've been talking about common parenting challenges that

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Speaker 3: have a huge impact on our day to day lives.

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Speaker 1: Especially as you're trying to get the kids back to school,

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Speaker 1: and today sleep routines.

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Speaker 3: How do you get your kids into a good sleep routine.

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Speaker 1: I don't know why, but they just don't like going

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Speaker 1: to bed that much. I think life is too exciting

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Speaker 1: when you're ten, or when you're seven, or when you're fifteen.

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Speaker 1: The take home message today starts not at the bedtime routine,

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Speaker 1: but at the opposite end of the day. The time

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Speaker 1: that you get out of bed in the morning essentially

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Speaker 1: starts your bodies into stop Watch and everything else through

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Speaker 1: the rest of the day, from meal times to bedtime

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Speaker 1: all seems to fall into place around that specific anchor point.

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Speaker 3: It seems about counterintuitive, doesn't it. If you want your

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Speaker 3: kids to go to bed early, it doesn't make sense

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Speaker 3: that you would pull them out of bed too early.

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Speaker 1: Funny story, true story. One of our friends many years

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Speaker 1: ago was telling me that he got his children up

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Speaker 1: at five o'clock every morning, five o'clock, so they had

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Speaker 1: In our church, in our faith, in our religious practice,

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Speaker 1: teenagers go to church most mornings and do some sort

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Speaker 1: of a scripture study or Bible study class. We call

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Speaker 1: it seminary. But he was getting his kids up one

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Speaker 1: hour before the class so they could exercise and have

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Speaker 1: some family time. I remember saying to him, how do

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Speaker 1: you do that? And he said, it's easy. I put

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Speaker 1: the kids to bed at eight pm. I said, apm,

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Speaker 1: how do you get the kids to bed at eight pm?

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Speaker 1: He said, it's easy. I get him up at five am.

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Speaker 1: It could have gone in circles. I was going to say,

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Speaker 1: how do you do that? And he would have said

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Speaker 1: eight pm and five am. But over the years we've

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Speaker 1: discovered that that's foundational. That's the secret.

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Speaker 3: Over the last few months, I've started to join you

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Speaker 3: on some early morning bike rides. We're starting to get

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Speaker 3: a bit more serious about our well being.

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Speaker 1: Colin's getting fuck Kylie's going to do triathlons, Coli'S on fire.

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Speaker 3: What is amazing to me is how our bodies respond

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Speaker 3: to the sun. So because of our early morning starts,

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Speaker 3: we don't actually close our curtains, and our bodies naturally

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Speaker 3: wake up as the room starts to light it.

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Speaker 1: And because we're in Queensland and the sun comes up

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Speaker 1: at approximately four forty am, we're awake at approximately four

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Speaker 1: poor forty am. I want to go Andrew Hubman for

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Speaker 1: a second. If you haven't listened to the Andrew Hubman podcast,

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Speaker 1: He's a Stanford researcher biology stuff, and he talks his

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Speaker 1: podcast like two three hours long. I'm not going to

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Speaker 1: do that too, but I did a quick hunt around

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Speaker 1: on the interwebs to find what I could about why

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Speaker 1: Humman is so big on getting up early. And here's

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Speaker 1: what I found. Number One, exposure to the morning sunlight

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Speaker 1: triggers a cascade of hormones that regulate the entire day

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Speaker 1: night cycle. This is all circadian rhythm stuff.

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Speaker 3: I feel pretty hormonal, but all the time, so I'm

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Speaker 3: probably not helping me very much.

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Speaker 1: I don't know at four forty in the morning is

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Speaker 1: when you're so much hormonal, is just tight, cranky, But

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Speaker 1: essentially what happens is consistent wake times help to regulate cortisol.

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Speaker 1: Cortersol is kind of like adrenaline it so it gets

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Speaker 1: you going kind of hormone. It naturally peaks in the

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Speaker 1: morning to promote alertness. When you wake up, that's the

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Speaker 1: time to do stuff, and Cubman Lab talks about how

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Speaker 1: the brain uses that that wake time as the primary

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Speaker 1: reference point to time the release of melatonin later that

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Speaker 1: day to get you ready for sleep.

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Speaker 3: Our body is just so amazing.

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Speaker 1: It's incredible if we let them do what they're supposed

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Speaker 1: to do, and that is, if we let nature be

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Speaker 1: the way it's supposed to be, which also explains Kylie

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Speaker 1: why when we get up at four forty in the

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Speaker 1: morning we are absolutely small. By about seven pm. We're

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Speaker 1: not the best parents in the world if we've been

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Speaker 1: exercising too much and getting up for those early days.

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Speaker 1: So there's a genuine biological foundation that suggests why we

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Speaker 1: are suggesting that the best way to get that sleep

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Speaker 1: routine sorted out. I know you can talk about sleep

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Speaker 1: hygiene and getting a nice routine, they're all important, but

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Speaker 1: getting up early in the morning it sets the body

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Speaker 1: up for a nice early night.

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Speaker 3: But for parents of teenagers, the idea of trying to

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Speaker 3: get their teenage daughter. I'm going to go daughter, but

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Speaker 3: I think sons would probably just be as tricky out

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Speaker 3: of bed before. I don't know, like, how do you

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Speaker 3: do that other than throwing them in the.

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Speaker 1: Pool, or you put them to bed at eight and

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Speaker 1: you get them five. I'm kidding. So we've got to

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Speaker 1: minimize screens. Okay, Screens are going to absolutely, categorically, unquestionably

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Speaker 1: stimulate the brain and keep the kids going. Additionally, research

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Speaker 1: has shown for a number of years now that kids

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Speaker 1: teenagers specifically produce mellots and a couple of hours later

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Speaker 1: than we do as adults, so they're circadian rhythm this way.

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Speaker 3: But they also need more sleep than us. So how

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Speaker 3: does this work?

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Speaker 1: Well? They do. They probably still need about nine to

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Speaker 1: ten hours, depending on their age. I mean we're talking

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Speaker 1: about on average, some need less, some need more, but

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Speaker 1: around about nine to ten. So if a teenager goes

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Speaker 1: to bed. Seriously, if a teenager goes to bed around

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Speaker 1: about nine o'clock, between nine and nine thirty, they can

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Speaker 1: get nine hours and get up at six to six thirty.

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Speaker 1: They've got plenty of time to make an effective day happen,

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Speaker 1: and nine to nine thirty is I don't know. I mean,

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Speaker 1: because I like to go to bed pretty early, that

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Speaker 1: feels like a reasonably late night. It's definitely staying up.

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Speaker 1: And if screens aren't part of the picture, there's not

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Speaker 1: much more to do after nine o'clock at night.

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Speaker 3: Okay, but you've had a tough week at school, you're

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Speaker 3: a bit exhausted, you've gone out late one night, and

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Speaker 3: then you decide you're going to have a sleep and

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Speaker 3: you're going to treat yourself to a sleep and isn't

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Speaker 3: that going to help?

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Speaker 1: No sleep in is a kind of like jet lag.

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Speaker 1: So if you let the kids have a sleep in

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Speaker 1: on the weekend, for example, what happened is that that

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Speaker 1: catch up sleep makes Monday morning harder because it's shifted

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Speaker 1: their circadian rhythm. If you've gone away to Perth and

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Speaker 1: you're on the East Coast, or if you're on the

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Speaker 1: West Coast and you've gone to the East Coast and

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Speaker 1: stayed in Sydney or Melbourne, or if you're flying over

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Speaker 1: to New Zealand, any of those sort of two hour

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Speaker 1: time zone changes, you get back into your regular time

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Speaker 1: zone and it takes a couple of days to adjust.

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Speaker 1: It's not like hardcore jet lag, like a big international

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Speaker 1: US or Europe holiday, but it's the same kind of thing.

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Speaker 1: You really drag the chain for a couple of days

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Speaker 1: because that two hour time zone shift really messes you up.

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Speaker 1: So circadian rhythms matter. If you want the kids to

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Speaker 1: go to bed and have a good routine in the nighttime,

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Speaker 1: getting them up on time really is critically important. After

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Speaker 1: the break, two more big reasons that kids need to

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Speaker 1: get up on time so that they can go to

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Speaker 1: bed on time. Okay, Kylie, Today it's one single slice

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Speaker 1: of advice, the most important thing that you can do

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Speaker 1: to help the kids to go to bed on time.

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Speaker 1: I've got two other ideas that I want to share.

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Speaker 1: One of them might be quite surprising. School performance is

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Speaker 1: connected to what time you wake up in the morning,

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Speaker 1: which is connected to what time you go to bed

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Speaker 1: at night.

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Speaker 3: Which is connected to what time you go get up

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Speaker 3: in the morning, which.

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Speaker 1: Is connected to going in circles morning sunlight. And this

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Speaker 1: is the critical thing. Right, you can get your kids

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Speaker 1: up early, but if they do not see the sun,

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Speaker 1: that is, if they lay in bed and stare at

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Speaker 1: their screen, it's probably not going to have as positive

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Speaker 1: an impact as if you can get them outside and

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Speaker 1: moving their bodies.

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Speaker 3: We haven't had this conversation until literally now, but I

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Speaker 3: have tried doing my exercise routine at various times through

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Speaker 3: the day. My favorite form of exercise is always outdoors.

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Speaker 3: I hate being inside, I hate being in jams. I

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Speaker 3: really love utilizing the beautiful outdoor space that we have,

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Speaker 3: and I have personally found that my day just feels

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Speaker 3: better if the first thing I do is get up

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Speaker 3: and go on exercise. My brain's not functioning properly trying

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Speaker 3: to read a book or do some meditation or pondering

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Speaker 3: or any number of other things that require a bit

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Speaker 3: more brain power. My brain hasn't fully clicked in, but

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Speaker 3: my body can and does really well.

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Speaker 1: A couple of responses, as you've said that I've scrounched

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Speaker 1: through my human notes. Number one, morning sunlight in exposure

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Speaker 1: increases alertness through melannops and containing retinal cells that directly

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Speaker 1: signal the brain's masterclock. I know that's a whole lot

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Speaker 1: of big words, but essentially, you get that sunlight in

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Speaker 1: and that's why you feel so good, and it's selling

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Speaker 1: your brain and your body, it's go time. Let's do this.

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Speaker 1: Whereas when you when you wake up late, you stumble

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Speaker 1: out the door and bleary eyed, and it's already seven

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Speaker 1: thirty eight o'clock, maybe even nine o'clock because you're late

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Speaker 1: for school, you don't get that same benefit. Have a

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Speaker 1: listened to this one, though, Studies show that students with

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Speaker 1: consistent wake times have better attention spans and better working

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Speaker 1: memory during their morning classes. In fact, researchers have found

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Speaker 1: that students with consistent wake up times show up to

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Speaker 1: twenty three sent better performance on morning cognitive tests compared

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Speaker 1: to those with irregular schedules. In other words, your brain

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Speaker 1: just functions better if you can consistently say, I wake

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Speaker 1: up every day at whatever it is, five point thirty

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Speaker 1: six o'clock, six thirty. I don't want to put too

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Speaker 1: much pressure on families, and many families might decide to

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Speaker 1: try this, and suddenly the kids are like, the first

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Speaker 1: week is going to be horrible. I guarantee the first

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Speaker 1: week is going to be awful, and the kids you

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Speaker 1: will still have your same evening habits, but getting that

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Speaker 1: morning routine wow, and the last one, and the brain

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Speaker 1: consolidates learning during sleep when you have irregular sleep patterns,

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Speaker 1: it disrupts the consolidation of learning process, which can impair

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Speaker 1: academic performance. So there's loads of really big school reasons

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Speaker 1: why you want to make sure the kids are getting

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Speaker 1: up at the right time, because that's the best thing

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Speaker 1: you can do for their sleep routine.

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Speaker 3: Say, it's the crazy thing, and it may not be

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Speaker 3: practical all the time, but if we want the kids

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Speaker 3: on a good sleep routine, we actually have to model it. Yes,

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Speaker 3: Like if we're doing that, if we're getting up early

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Speaker 3: and we're going to bed early, our kids kind of

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Speaker 3: will jump on the back. Over the last few months,

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Speaker 3: we've gone on a bit of a health kick in

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Speaker 3: our family. We've been a bit sslch for a very

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Speaker 3: long time, and our eldest daughter decided she wanted to

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Speaker 3: do a triathlon and she asked me to join her.

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Speaker 3: So we've started training. I started writing with you as

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Speaker 3: a result of that, which got you back out of

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Speaker 3: bed because you haven't been training for a while, And

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Speaker 3: all of a sudden, just slowly, because we were doing it,

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Speaker 3: our kids one by one, literally one by one, have

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Speaker 3: gone you. Actually, I think I'm going to start running

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Speaker 3: and I am blowing away at their resolve and their

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Speaker 3: desire to do it, and it all stemmed from just

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Speaker 3: seeing me and you getting out each morning.

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Speaker 1: Yeah yep. So getting that regular wake up time will

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Speaker 1: have a positive flow on through the family. But it

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Speaker 1: will not happen the way you want it to happen,

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Speaker 1: or when you expect it to happen, or anything like that.

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Speaker 1: It just happens bit by bit. Work with the kids,

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Speaker 1: have a family meeting, talk about how you want to

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Speaker 1: do an experiment. Let them know that the first week

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Speaker 1: is going to be really, really, really hard. But our

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Speaker 1: slice of advice, if you want things to go better,

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Speaker 1: if you want the kids to have that build up

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Speaker 1: of sleep pressure at the night so nighttimes are easier,

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Speaker 1: create a fixed and consistent wake time because it will

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Speaker 1: naturally build up the hormones and the brain chemicals so

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Speaker 1: that they're tired at night and they get the sleep

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Speaker 1: that they need. When you vary your wake times, the

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Speaker 1: brain struggles to predict when to initiate sleep preparation and

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Speaker 1: sleep suffers, and so does like the kids become more

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Speaker 1: emotional more, I mean, they just become more challenging socially.

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Speaker 1: We hope that you've enjoyed our slices of advice this

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Speaker 1: week on the Happy Families podcast. The Happy Famili's podcast

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Speaker 1: is produced by Justin Ruland from Bridge Media. More information

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Speaker 1: and more resources about how to make your family happier

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Speaker 1: can be found a Happy families dot com dot A.

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Speaker 1: You have a great weekend.