1 00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:19,440 Speaker 1: She's on the Money. She's on the Money. 2 00:00:23,320 --> 00:00:26,240 Speaker 2: Hello and welcome to She's on the Money, the podcast 3 00:00:26,280 --> 00:00:30,440 Speaker 2: for millennials who want financial freedom. Happy Monday, Welcome back 4 00:00:30,480 --> 00:00:33,519 Speaker 2: to another shot back Money Diary Monday episode where we 5 00:00:33,720 --> 00:00:37,239 Speaker 2: Victoria chat to one of our gorgeous community members. 6 00:00:37,280 --> 00:00:40,480 Speaker 3: Literally their best day of the week. The most fun 7 00:00:40,560 --> 00:00:43,519 Speaker 3: episodes are money diaries. Like, I'm not hearing it. I 8 00:00:43,520 --> 00:00:46,960 Speaker 3: don't even care that on Friday drinks we literally sometimes drink. 9 00:00:47,360 --> 00:00:48,800 Speaker 3: Still more fun on money diarries. 10 00:00:49,120 --> 00:00:52,800 Speaker 2: I completely agree. And this week we've got another banger. 11 00:00:53,000 --> 00:00:55,760 Speaker 3: So oh, we always have a banger. I mean in 12 00:00:55,840 --> 00:00:58,960 Speaker 3: saying that, that's because we have a wonderful content producer 13 00:00:59,160 --> 00:01:02,040 Speaker 3: who makes sure that every money diary is super engaging 14 00:01:02,280 --> 00:01:05,800 Speaker 3: in saying that everyone's money story is always really exciting 15 00:01:05,840 --> 00:01:07,920 Speaker 3: to hear. So I just do you ever get a 16 00:01:07,920 --> 00:01:09,679 Speaker 3: bad money diary? I don't think we've ever had a 17 00:01:09,680 --> 00:01:10,520 Speaker 3: bad money diary. 18 00:01:10,640 --> 00:01:12,039 Speaker 2: I don't think we have either. And if you do 19 00:01:12,120 --> 00:01:14,400 Speaker 2: want to submit your diary, there's a form on our 20 00:01:14,400 --> 00:01:16,759 Speaker 2: website you can fill out. We read all of them. 21 00:01:16,840 --> 00:01:19,759 Speaker 2: We get so many, and we're so grateful, So if 22 00:01:19,800 --> 00:01:22,720 Speaker 2: you don't hear from us, we're really sorry, but we're 23 00:01:22,760 --> 00:01:25,360 Speaker 2: just really lucky that we get to read and engage 24 00:01:25,400 --> 00:01:26,480 Speaker 2: with all of these stories. 25 00:01:26,520 --> 00:01:28,880 Speaker 3: And then, Jenner, I promise you we read them. If 26 00:01:28,880 --> 00:01:32,119 Speaker 3: we haven't replied, at least know that every money diary 27 00:01:32,120 --> 00:01:35,840 Speaker 3: that comes into our inbox does get read. We sometimes 28 00:01:36,040 --> 00:01:37,920 Speaker 3: just don't have the capacity to get back to you. 29 00:01:38,000 --> 00:01:42,120 Speaker 3: But in saying that today's money Diary, Jess, could you 30 00:01:42,160 --> 00:01:44,200 Speaker 3: read out their email. Let's get into this. 31 00:01:44,600 --> 00:01:47,199 Speaker 2: So this week's diarist said, I have always been able 32 00:01:47,200 --> 00:01:49,800 Speaker 2: to save for things I prioritize and where possible, have 33 00:01:49,880 --> 00:01:52,440 Speaker 2: been debt free. However, I've never had savings until the 34 00:01:52,560 --> 00:01:55,680 Speaker 2: last few years now being the primary income earner with 35 00:01:55,760 --> 00:01:59,200 Speaker 2: a mortgage paying for the unit as I go and IVF. 36 00:01:58,800 --> 00:01:59,880 Speaker 3: On future horizons. 37 00:02:00,280 --> 00:02:02,520 Speaker 2: Over the past ten years, I've had to learn and 38 00:02:02,560 --> 00:02:05,480 Speaker 2: grow with my now husband to manage my mindset. When 39 00:02:05,520 --> 00:02:09,160 Speaker 2: he will spend several hundred dollars a week on lost consumables, 40 00:02:09,320 --> 00:02:11,400 Speaker 2: and for the first several years of our relationship we 41 00:02:11,440 --> 00:02:14,520 Speaker 2: would live each week being a saver, it blows my mind. 42 00:02:14,639 --> 00:02:17,120 Speaker 2: So I've had to establish a balance to move forward 43 00:02:17,120 --> 00:02:19,400 Speaker 2: in our relationship without being his mom. 44 00:02:19,600 --> 00:02:24,120 Speaker 3: Oh that is a big one. The mum card, Money Diarist, 45 00:02:24,160 --> 00:02:29,160 Speaker 3: You are obviously on the line already welcome to the show. Oh, 46 00:02:29,200 --> 00:02:31,800 Speaker 3: I have so many questions. I feel like this is 47 00:02:31,840 --> 00:02:35,040 Speaker 3: such an exciting money diary and so relatable, Like how 48 00:02:35,080 --> 00:02:36,640 Speaker 3: many people are going to be listening to this and 49 00:02:36,639 --> 00:02:38,639 Speaker 3: they're like, you know what, I do? Feel like I'm 50 00:02:38,639 --> 00:02:42,359 Speaker 3: mothering my partner sometimes and where's the line? Like how 51 00:02:42,400 --> 00:02:44,440 Speaker 3: do you manage that? I'm going to learn a lot 52 00:02:44,520 --> 00:02:47,440 Speaker 3: about this, but as always, we are going to start 53 00:02:47,480 --> 00:02:51,560 Speaker 3: with our structured questions. So first things first, money Diarist, 54 00:02:51,880 --> 00:02:53,959 Speaker 3: what is your attitude towards money? 55 00:02:54,440 --> 00:02:55,720 Speaker 4: I think it's pretty good. 56 00:02:55,720 --> 00:02:58,000 Speaker 5: I've always kind of lived as I've gone, but I've 57 00:02:58,000 --> 00:03:01,600 Speaker 5: always been able to say for I've wanted to do so. 58 00:03:02,040 --> 00:03:04,680 Speaker 5: I've never sort of had the privilege of having a 59 00:03:04,720 --> 00:03:06,959 Speaker 5: good income in the background. My parents were mum with 60 00:03:07,080 --> 00:03:10,480 Speaker 5: single parent, so I've always sort of worked from thirteen 61 00:03:10,560 --> 00:03:12,320 Speaker 5: and had to do it myself. 62 00:03:12,520 --> 00:03:15,520 Speaker 3: Epic and how much money do you earn and what 63 00:03:15,560 --> 00:03:17,639 Speaker 3: do you do for work? Money diarists. 64 00:03:18,040 --> 00:03:20,320 Speaker 5: So I'm the team leader of a support coordination team 65 00:03:20,320 --> 00:03:22,919 Speaker 5: that works through the NDIS and I'm on ninety five 66 00:03:23,080 --> 00:03:23,560 Speaker 5: is in a year? 67 00:03:23,960 --> 00:03:26,160 Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, do you know how many people Jess 68 00:03:26,280 --> 00:03:27,960 Speaker 3: have been on the show recently, but a. 69 00:03:28,040 --> 00:03:28,640 Speaker 2: Lot of them. 70 00:03:28,800 --> 00:03:31,680 Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, you guys are special humans. And to 71 00:03:31,680 --> 00:03:33,840 Speaker 3: know you're all in our community. How lucky are we? 72 00:03:34,520 --> 00:03:35,760 Speaker 4: It's a big industry. 73 00:03:36,760 --> 00:03:39,160 Speaker 3: Look, it's a massive industry, but it's full of special 74 00:03:39,200 --> 00:03:41,360 Speaker 3: people and to know that you guys are all here 75 00:03:41,480 --> 00:03:45,000 Speaker 3: like that is obviously in a pick job, great income, 76 00:03:45,400 --> 00:03:47,960 Speaker 3: but that would be a very taxing job. Do you 77 00:03:48,000 --> 00:03:49,400 Speaker 3: find that to be the case? 78 00:03:49,880 --> 00:03:53,240 Speaker 5: Yeah, it can be very I guess I'm organizing other 79 00:03:53,240 --> 00:03:55,280 Speaker 5: people's lives, so I'm great at doing theirs. 80 00:03:55,440 --> 00:03:56,800 Speaker 4: I come home and minds a disaster. 81 00:03:57,680 --> 00:04:00,560 Speaker 3: Oh, isn't that the case? The plumber always has a 82 00:04:00,640 --> 00:04:06,520 Speaker 3: leaky tap? Had money diarist? What is your big money goal. 83 00:04:06,840 --> 00:04:08,960 Speaker 5: I've kind of achieved all my goals, but I think 84 00:04:09,000 --> 00:04:11,360 Speaker 5: what we're aiming for is to buy a little second 85 00:04:11,360 --> 00:04:14,640 Speaker 5: property is a bit of a holiday home. So that's 86 00:04:14,680 --> 00:04:16,559 Speaker 5: sort of a long term goal with all the market 87 00:04:16,560 --> 00:04:18,479 Speaker 5: at the moment, so no rush, but that's something we 88 00:04:18,560 --> 00:04:19,360 Speaker 5: want to work towards. 89 00:04:19,440 --> 00:04:22,680 Speaker 3: Oh, that is so exciting. What is the most recent 90 00:04:22,760 --> 00:04:24,080 Speaker 3: money goal that you achieved? 91 00:04:24,480 --> 00:04:26,280 Speaker 5: Im as you've heard of me and I'm kind of 92 00:04:26,320 --> 00:04:28,920 Speaker 5: paying my UNI fees as I go, So that's really 93 00:04:29,480 --> 00:04:32,719 Speaker 5: where I'm aiming for every trimesto and just getting those paid. 94 00:04:33,279 --> 00:04:36,120 Speaker 3: Before you mentioned that you had a mortgage and obviously 95 00:04:36,200 --> 00:04:38,599 Speaker 3: you are getting on top of saving. How have you 96 00:04:38,800 --> 00:04:43,880 Speaker 3: managed money diarist to pay UNI upfront? Is that a choice? 97 00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:46,680 Speaker 3: Or is that because maybe you don't have access to 98 00:04:46,760 --> 00:04:49,760 Speaker 3: He's like, why did you make that decision? So I 99 00:04:49,920 --> 00:04:51,000 Speaker 3: do have access to HEX. 100 00:04:51,000 --> 00:04:52,760 Speaker 5: Obviously I am from originally from the UK, but I 101 00:04:52,760 --> 00:04:56,400 Speaker 5: am a citizen, so I was going to put onto 102 00:04:56,440 --> 00:04:58,240 Speaker 5: my help. But then I was talking to the finance 103 00:04:58,279 --> 00:05:01,400 Speaker 5: officer at unit at work and she'd actually mentioned if 104 00:05:01,400 --> 00:05:02,600 Speaker 5: I pay it off as I go, if I'm in 105 00:05:02,640 --> 00:05:04,919 Speaker 5: a position to do that, I could claim on my packs. 106 00:05:05,279 --> 00:05:08,520 Speaker 3: Oh money win. That's actually a really good tip. Actually, 107 00:05:08,720 --> 00:05:11,800 Speaker 3: if you're working at the same time as doing UNI 108 00:05:11,880 --> 00:05:14,400 Speaker 3: and it's a related degree to your current employment, you 109 00:05:14,400 --> 00:05:16,760 Speaker 3: can actually claim it. That's a bit of a money win. Hey. 110 00:05:16,960 --> 00:05:17,200 Speaker 4: Yeah. 111 00:05:17,279 --> 00:05:20,080 Speaker 5: So I would have like, really, the money would just 112 00:05:20,080 --> 00:05:22,279 Speaker 5: be going into my savings at this point anyway, So 113 00:05:23,040 --> 00:05:25,040 Speaker 5: I just thought, why not, I'm going to pay it anywhere. 114 00:05:25,040 --> 00:05:26,440 Speaker 4: I wanted to sort of pay it as I went 115 00:05:26,680 --> 00:05:27,760 Speaker 4: or close to so. 116 00:05:28,320 --> 00:05:30,600 Speaker 3: And hey, if you're able to claim it on tax, 117 00:05:30,760 --> 00:05:34,520 Speaker 3: that is one of the bigger money wins. Especially when 118 00:05:34,560 --> 00:05:37,520 Speaker 3: you have a ninety five thousand dollars income, any claim 119 00:05:37,720 --> 00:05:41,760 Speaker 3: is absolutely worth it. Next question money Doris, is do 120 00:05:41,800 --> 00:05:43,880 Speaker 3: you currently have any investments. 121 00:05:44,320 --> 00:05:44,720 Speaker 4: I do. 122 00:05:44,839 --> 00:05:47,240 Speaker 5: I've started with Spaceship after I started listening with you 123 00:05:47,279 --> 00:05:52,599 Speaker 5: guys a few weeks ago. I invested into Comsex, saying 124 00:05:52,600 --> 00:05:54,159 Speaker 5: that I have no clue what I was doing, so 125 00:05:54,240 --> 00:05:55,360 Speaker 5: we'll see how that goes. 126 00:05:56,160 --> 00:05:58,720 Speaker 3: Sometimes the best way to get started is to just 127 00:05:58,760 --> 00:06:01,520 Speaker 3: get started. Can you tell me a little bit about 128 00:06:01,520 --> 00:06:04,599 Speaker 3: why you chose that platform and how you made the 129 00:06:04,680 --> 00:06:07,400 Speaker 3: decision to just go boots and all in and download 130 00:06:07,440 --> 00:06:09,240 Speaker 3: the app and start investing on it. 131 00:06:09,360 --> 00:06:10,400 Speaker 4: Yes, I wanted to. 132 00:06:10,720 --> 00:06:12,400 Speaker 5: My big goal I guess that was probably my big 133 00:06:12,440 --> 00:06:14,360 Speaker 5: money goal was to invest, but I just haven't had 134 00:06:14,360 --> 00:06:16,920 Speaker 5: time to learn about it. So I've sort of then 135 00:06:16,960 --> 00:06:19,880 Speaker 5: realized for your podcast that go into a financial advisor, 136 00:06:20,400 --> 00:06:21,839 Speaker 5: I'd need to be investing a lot more. 137 00:06:22,400 --> 00:06:22,479 Speaker 4: So. 138 00:06:22,520 --> 00:06:24,240 Speaker 5: I don't think I'm in a position to do that yet, 139 00:06:24,279 --> 00:06:26,480 Speaker 5: but I wanted to at least achieve something towards that 140 00:06:26,560 --> 00:06:27,200 Speaker 5: goal this year. 141 00:06:27,640 --> 00:06:30,039 Speaker 3: Oh I love that, and that's actually one of the 142 00:06:30,040 --> 00:06:33,120 Speaker 3: most frustrating things about our industry I find all about 143 00:06:33,120 --> 00:06:38,200 Speaker 3: my industry is that financial advice can be so inaccessible, 144 00:06:38,720 --> 00:06:41,960 Speaker 3: and it's just so frustrating when you're in a position 145 00:06:41,960 --> 00:06:43,279 Speaker 3: where you're like, you know what, I want to create 146 00:06:43,320 --> 00:06:45,880 Speaker 3: wealth for myself. I really want to create a secure 147 00:06:45,920 --> 00:06:48,960 Speaker 3: financial future. I've saved maybe my first five thousand dollars, 148 00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:51,520 Speaker 3: and I want to go see a financial advisor. The 149 00:06:51,560 --> 00:06:55,120 Speaker 3: idea that a statement of advice for investment can be 150 00:06:55,200 --> 00:06:57,640 Speaker 3: so prohibitive. I don't want to save my first five 151 00:06:57,720 --> 00:06:59,760 Speaker 3: grand and then have most of that taken up in 152 00:06:59,800 --> 00:07:02,080 Speaker 3: fear with a financial advisor. It just feels like you're 153 00:07:02,080 --> 00:07:06,120 Speaker 3: going backwards. So I totally get that, and that is 154 00:07:06,160 --> 00:07:09,200 Speaker 3: why I'm such a big fan of people making those 155 00:07:09,240 --> 00:07:13,040 Speaker 3: steps themselves, or going onto our six park platform and 156 00:07:13,120 --> 00:07:16,480 Speaker 3: learning more about it in their own way, because sometimes 157 00:07:16,480 --> 00:07:19,360 Speaker 3: you just don't need a financial advisor to start the journey. 158 00:07:19,720 --> 00:07:21,800 Speaker 3: I'm like, I probably should be telling you all that 159 00:07:21,920 --> 00:07:24,520 Speaker 3: you need a financial advisor as a financial advisor, but 160 00:07:24,800 --> 00:07:26,920 Speaker 3: I think we've learned enough on this podcast to give 161 00:07:26,960 --> 00:07:28,160 Speaker 3: it a hot crack ourselves. 162 00:07:28,240 --> 00:07:31,000 Speaker 5: Hey yeah, so yeah, No, it's just to get on 163 00:07:31,040 --> 00:07:32,640 Speaker 5: to it and then yeah, I think over the next 164 00:07:32,640 --> 00:07:35,200 Speaker 5: few years I'll go a bit bigger. But yeah, definitely 165 00:07:35,280 --> 00:07:36,679 Speaker 5: need to do my education on that one. 166 00:07:36,800 --> 00:07:40,240 Speaker 3: Small steps are still steps in the right direction. Moneyed dirist. 167 00:07:41,080 --> 00:07:45,080 Speaker 3: Next question is do you currently have any debts? If so, 168 00:07:45,320 --> 00:07:46,080 Speaker 3: what are they? 169 00:07:46,520 --> 00:07:49,480 Speaker 5: Yep, So we've got a mortgage and then we've got 170 00:07:49,480 --> 00:07:52,160 Speaker 5: a car loan which has twenty thousand dollars remaining on it. 171 00:07:52,800 --> 00:07:54,960 Speaker 3: And tell me a little bit about your mortgage. How 172 00:07:54,960 --> 00:07:56,960 Speaker 3: do you manage that one month to month? 173 00:07:57,080 --> 00:07:59,400 Speaker 5: Yeah, so I actually pay a thousand dollars extra each 174 00:07:59,440 --> 00:07:59,920 Speaker 5: month off that. 175 00:08:00,400 --> 00:08:03,320 Speaker 3: So are you You're just like a little money wiz. 176 00:08:03,360 --> 00:08:05,400 Speaker 3: You came on money doaris to show off how good 177 00:08:05,440 --> 00:08:06,200 Speaker 3: you are at money? 178 00:08:07,320 --> 00:08:09,920 Speaker 5: So I actually, when the interest rates went really low, 179 00:08:10,000 --> 00:08:15,400 Speaker 5: I decided to split it between veryborn fixed. So with 180 00:08:15,440 --> 00:08:18,040 Speaker 5: that I was able to sort of have half a 181 00:08:18,040 --> 00:08:21,240 Speaker 5: bit fixed, half variable, so I can pay extra repayments. 182 00:08:21,800 --> 00:08:24,480 Speaker 5: But the way my salary packaging was set up was 183 00:08:24,560 --> 00:08:26,200 Speaker 5: it was going to the wrong account where I had 184 00:08:26,200 --> 00:08:28,680 Speaker 5: to pay most money. So I just went, Joe, what 185 00:08:29,000 --> 00:08:31,000 Speaker 5: I'm not losing it, Let's leave it where it is, 186 00:08:31,120 --> 00:08:33,360 Speaker 5: and then I've just paid the extra repayments to the 187 00:08:33,400 --> 00:08:33,920 Speaker 5: other account. 188 00:08:34,040 --> 00:08:36,120 Speaker 3: I love that. I feel like you're super on top 189 00:08:36,200 --> 00:08:39,680 Speaker 3: of it. My next question, money Diarist, is do you 190 00:08:39,800 --> 00:08:40,840 Speaker 3: use shop back? 191 00:08:41,320 --> 00:08:41,400 Speaker 4: So? 192 00:08:41,640 --> 00:08:43,480 Speaker 5: Actually, I had shot back for years. I used to 193 00:08:43,600 --> 00:08:45,400 Speaker 5: use it on good old eBay back in the day. 194 00:08:47,040 --> 00:08:48,880 Speaker 5: I don't do much on my shopping, but I do 195 00:08:48,960 --> 00:08:49,280 Speaker 5: have it. 196 00:08:49,760 --> 00:08:52,000 Speaker 3: Oh. I love that. I feel like everyone's got their 197 00:08:52,040 --> 00:08:54,920 Speaker 3: own journey with it and it's not a she's on 198 00:08:54,960 --> 00:08:57,000 Speaker 3: the money money when if you haven't really used shot 199 00:08:57,080 --> 00:09:02,160 Speaker 3: back in addition to buying something online. Next question, money Diarist, 200 00:09:02,320 --> 00:09:04,480 Speaker 3: what is your best money habit? 201 00:09:05,240 --> 00:09:07,600 Speaker 5: I think if there's something I want to achieve, I'll 202 00:09:07,600 --> 00:09:11,400 Speaker 5: do it regardless of what financial position I'm in. Previously 203 00:09:11,400 --> 00:09:14,760 Speaker 5: to this job, I would work just casual jobs retail cells, 204 00:09:15,559 --> 00:09:17,760 Speaker 5: but regardless of the income, if I want to achieve something, 205 00:09:17,840 --> 00:09:18,640 Speaker 5: I work towards that. 206 00:09:18,960 --> 00:09:22,200 Speaker 3: How do you have that mindset? Now? I'm asking that 207 00:09:22,280 --> 00:09:25,800 Speaker 3: because I just feel like so often we see other 208 00:09:25,840 --> 00:09:29,040 Speaker 3: people achieving goals and you look at yourself and go, oh, 209 00:09:29,080 --> 00:09:32,040 Speaker 3: I could never do that, or that's not achievable for me. 210 00:09:32,360 --> 00:09:34,280 Speaker 3: How have you got the mindset of like, no, if 211 00:09:34,280 --> 00:09:36,440 Speaker 3: ione to achieve something, I'm going to do it. Like, 212 00:09:36,520 --> 00:09:37,760 Speaker 3: how do we learn from you. 213 00:09:38,160 --> 00:09:40,439 Speaker 5: I think where I grew up, a lot of people 214 00:09:40,480 --> 00:09:42,520 Speaker 5: had sort of more money than me around me, so 215 00:09:42,640 --> 00:09:45,720 Speaker 5: I always had to say and pay for stuff myself. 216 00:09:45,760 --> 00:09:47,520 Speaker 5: My mum was never in a position to just go 217 00:09:47,559 --> 00:09:49,840 Speaker 5: and buy me what I wanted. So I think because 218 00:09:49,880 --> 00:09:52,400 Speaker 5: I've grown up having to do everything by myself, and 219 00:09:52,559 --> 00:09:56,080 Speaker 5: that since I was thirteen fourteen, I've just gone, you 220 00:09:56,080 --> 00:09:58,280 Speaker 5: know what, life's too short. If I want something, I'm 221 00:09:58,320 --> 00:09:59,880 Speaker 5: the only one that I can rely on to do that. 222 00:10:00,120 --> 00:10:01,800 Speaker 3: And then you just put your mind to it and 223 00:10:01,880 --> 00:10:05,960 Speaker 3: get it done. And have you ever found that you've 224 00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:08,480 Speaker 3: been disappointed with that journey? Like have you ever been 225 00:10:08,520 --> 00:10:10,360 Speaker 3: like wow, like I've set this goal and not been 226 00:10:10,360 --> 00:10:12,160 Speaker 3: able to achieve it, or are you just like, no, 227 00:10:12,440 --> 00:10:14,400 Speaker 3: even if I come up against a hurdle, I'm going 228 00:10:14,440 --> 00:10:15,560 Speaker 3: to make it work somehow. 229 00:10:16,480 --> 00:10:17,920 Speaker 4: I think I'm really good at winging it. 230 00:10:18,000 --> 00:10:21,200 Speaker 5: So I think even I've tried to aim for something, 231 00:10:21,240 --> 00:10:24,000 Speaker 5: I've kind of got where. Not in a dragged way, 232 00:10:24,000 --> 00:10:25,520 Speaker 5: but I've kind of always been able to get there, 233 00:10:25,520 --> 00:10:28,080 Speaker 5: whether it's extending the timeline a little bit or just 234 00:10:28,120 --> 00:10:30,480 Speaker 5: going nope, that's a goal. And if I'm having to 235 00:10:30,480 --> 00:10:34,000 Speaker 5: live off supernodles for every week and every day for 236 00:10:34,040 --> 00:10:34,880 Speaker 5: the next six months. 237 00:10:34,880 --> 00:10:36,000 Speaker 4: That's how it's going to happen. 238 00:10:36,320 --> 00:10:38,840 Speaker 3: I adore that, and I feel like it's such a 239 00:10:38,880 --> 00:10:42,520 Speaker 3: good story because it's a piece that so many people go, oh, 240 00:10:42,559 --> 00:10:44,720 Speaker 3: I could never do that, because they're not willing to 241 00:10:44,720 --> 00:10:49,360 Speaker 3: make that sacrifice. And achieving goals is often very much 242 00:10:49,400 --> 00:10:52,079 Speaker 3: about sacrifice. And you just said even if I have 243 00:10:52,160 --> 00:10:54,760 Speaker 3: to live off supernodles, like, that's just it right, Like 244 00:10:54,800 --> 00:10:57,719 Speaker 3: you've compromised something to achieve a goal that was more 245 00:10:57,760 --> 00:10:59,840 Speaker 3: important to you. I love that. I think that is 246 00:11:00,080 --> 00:11:01,199 Speaker 3: a great money habit. 247 00:11:01,320 --> 00:11:03,000 Speaker 5: I had a lot of friends in the UK for 248 00:11:03,200 --> 00:11:04,920 Speaker 5: years go how did you afford to go over there? 249 00:11:04,920 --> 00:11:05,800 Speaker 4: How are you affording it? 250 00:11:05,960 --> 00:11:08,559 Speaker 5: But each week they're buying the new clothes, they're getting 251 00:11:08,559 --> 00:11:10,920 Speaker 5: their nails done, they're getting their hair done. The last 252 00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:12,679 Speaker 5: time I got my nails done was maybe a year 253 00:11:12,720 --> 00:11:17,640 Speaker 5: and a half ago for wedding. So it's prioritizing those needs. 254 00:11:17,559 --> 00:11:19,440 Speaker 3: I do think. And this is going to be a 255 00:11:19,440 --> 00:11:21,960 Speaker 3: bit rich coming from me, because if you guys have 256 00:11:22,000 --> 00:11:24,280 Speaker 3: seen me on social media, I do always have my 257 00:11:24,360 --> 00:11:27,559 Speaker 3: nails done and I am a big fan of eyelash extensions. 258 00:11:27,600 --> 00:11:29,920 Speaker 3: But I think we really need to remember that those 259 00:11:29,960 --> 00:11:33,000 Speaker 3: things are luxuries, they aren't necessities. And I think that 260 00:11:33,200 --> 00:11:36,240 Speaker 3: in this year and this day and age, we get 261 00:11:36,280 --> 00:11:40,720 Speaker 3: confused between luxuries and necessities and we confuse the two 262 00:11:40,720 --> 00:11:42,520 Speaker 3: and you go, oh no, but I need to get 263 00:11:42,520 --> 00:11:45,520 Speaker 3: my nails done and I have to have my eyelashes done, 264 00:11:45,559 --> 00:11:48,400 Speaker 3: and it's like, well, actually you don't. And if you've 265 00:11:48,400 --> 00:11:51,800 Speaker 3: got a bigger goal that isn't eyelashes or nails, that 266 00:11:51,840 --> 00:11:54,480 Speaker 3: stuff adds up. I know here in Melbourne, getting your 267 00:11:54,559 --> 00:11:57,000 Speaker 3: nails done, if I go into the city, because you 268 00:11:57,040 --> 00:12:00,320 Speaker 3: know we're Melbourne based, it's about fifty bucks to get 269 00:12:00,320 --> 00:12:03,559 Speaker 3: our nails done at a minimum, and then lashes are 270 00:12:03,600 --> 00:12:06,760 Speaker 3: even more and that adds up like each in every 271 00:12:06,840 --> 00:12:09,480 Speaker 3: single month. That is a really big amount of money 272 00:12:09,480 --> 00:12:11,880 Speaker 3: to be allocating in your budget. And I'm not meaning 273 00:12:11,920 --> 00:12:15,439 Speaker 3: to sound shamy, because don't get me wrong, I do 274 00:12:15,520 --> 00:12:20,400 Speaker 3: these things. But something I've learned very recently, not even recently, 275 00:12:20,400 --> 00:12:22,200 Speaker 3: it feels recently because it was at the start of 276 00:12:22,240 --> 00:12:25,439 Speaker 3: COVID is doing my own nails and how much money 277 00:12:25,480 --> 00:12:27,719 Speaker 3: I've saved. I'm like, oh my gosh, I can have 278 00:12:27,760 --> 00:12:31,800 Speaker 3: my cake and eat it too. So it's interesting how 279 00:12:31,840 --> 00:12:34,720 Speaker 3: you're saying, hey, yeah, like they were going and doing 280 00:12:34,760 --> 00:12:37,480 Speaker 3: these things, but that's their value set. We're not shaming it. 281 00:12:37,480 --> 00:12:40,320 Speaker 3: We're just saying you had a goal and you work 282 00:12:40,400 --> 00:12:44,400 Speaker 3: towards it. I adore it. But flip side of that, 283 00:12:44,520 --> 00:12:47,160 Speaker 3: my friend, what's your worst money habit? 284 00:12:47,520 --> 00:12:50,440 Speaker 4: Worse is? I think we'll probably more about it. 285 00:12:50,440 --> 00:12:52,960 Speaker 5: But because my husband will go and spend money freely, 286 00:12:53,480 --> 00:12:56,600 Speaker 5: I'll go and be like, oh, well, if you're spending there, 287 00:12:56,679 --> 00:12:58,400 Speaker 5: I can go and justify buying. 288 00:12:58,120 --> 00:13:00,959 Speaker 4: This amount of money, and. 289 00:13:01,080 --> 00:13:03,200 Speaker 5: I get I don't get out of control, but I 290 00:13:03,240 --> 00:13:05,600 Speaker 5: do sometimes buy stuff because I'm like, let if I 291 00:13:05,679 --> 00:13:06,280 Speaker 5: deserve it. 292 00:13:06,840 --> 00:13:09,079 Speaker 3: Yep, you've done it, so I get to do it. 293 00:13:09,400 --> 00:13:12,040 Speaker 3: Do you find that that compromises your bigger goals in 294 00:13:12,120 --> 00:13:12,560 Speaker 3: any way? 295 00:13:13,400 --> 00:13:15,440 Speaker 5: Probably not, because I'm not a big spend on an 296 00:13:15,440 --> 00:13:18,520 Speaker 5: everyday basis, so I don't just spend a lot on 297 00:13:18,559 --> 00:13:20,680 Speaker 5: a weekly basis. I'm kind of one of those people 298 00:13:20,679 --> 00:13:23,520 Speaker 5: where I'll live off my needs and put it aside, 299 00:13:23,520 --> 00:13:25,360 Speaker 5: but then I don't track if I want to go 300 00:13:25,400 --> 00:13:26,679 Speaker 5: and buy myself something. 301 00:13:26,960 --> 00:13:30,679 Speaker 3: Yeah, that's fair money. Diarist. Last question before I get 302 00:13:30,720 --> 00:13:33,600 Speaker 3: to deep dive into asking the perfect questions. I have 303 00:13:33,760 --> 00:13:36,920 Speaker 3: been chomping of a bit to ask. If we forced 304 00:13:36,920 --> 00:13:39,400 Speaker 3: you to give yourself a money grade, what would you 305 00:13:39,480 --> 00:13:40,359 Speaker 3: grade yourself? 306 00:13:41,360 --> 00:13:44,720 Speaker 5: I think I but I think I definitely want to 307 00:13:44,720 --> 00:13:48,040 Speaker 5: work more in that investment area in the long term. 308 00:13:48,120 --> 00:13:49,840 Speaker 4: So I've still got a little bit there to go. 309 00:13:50,280 --> 00:13:51,959 Speaker 3: I love that. Let's go to a quick break, and 310 00:13:52,040 --> 00:13:55,200 Speaker 3: then I'm going to ask those deep, perfect questions about 311 00:13:55,200 --> 00:13:59,440 Speaker 3: your relationship. We are back money diarist. I want to 312 00:13:59,520 --> 00:14:03,079 Speaker 3: just get straight into it and ask you about your 313 00:14:03,080 --> 00:14:07,320 Speaker 3: relationship and your different money stories. So let's start there. 314 00:14:07,920 --> 00:14:10,360 Speaker 3: You said before that you grew up in a single 315 00:14:10,440 --> 00:14:13,520 Speaker 3: parent household. Is that how your partner grew up or 316 00:14:13,840 --> 00:14:16,840 Speaker 3: why do you think that your money stories are so different? 317 00:14:17,160 --> 00:14:20,080 Speaker 5: And so I grew up with a single mom, two siblings. 318 00:14:20,200 --> 00:14:23,000 Speaker 5: He grew up his parents were separated, but they live 319 00:14:23,040 --> 00:14:24,120 Speaker 5: around the corner to each other. 320 00:14:24,280 --> 00:14:25,160 Speaker 4: They don't get on. 321 00:14:25,240 --> 00:14:27,320 Speaker 5: But that he used to sort of go from one 322 00:14:27,320 --> 00:14:29,080 Speaker 5: house to the other, and he was able to play 323 00:14:29,080 --> 00:14:31,080 Speaker 5: his parents off each other to get what he wanted. 324 00:14:31,720 --> 00:14:34,360 Speaker 3: Oh gosh, yeah, okay, we want to know someone who 325 00:14:34,560 --> 00:14:35,560 Speaker 3: was able to do that. 326 00:14:36,320 --> 00:14:39,280 Speaker 5: Yeah, whereas I had to work for my own money, 327 00:14:40,480 --> 00:14:43,440 Speaker 5: so we met. He's actually from overseas, so we actually 328 00:14:43,440 --> 00:14:47,160 Speaker 5: met in Australia backpack in ten years ago when we 329 00:14:47,160 --> 00:14:48,120 Speaker 5: were twenty years old. 330 00:14:48,240 --> 00:14:52,360 Speaker 3: So oh so sweet. And you're from the UK, so 331 00:14:52,480 --> 00:14:56,520 Speaker 3: you've decided to both settle here. Yes, Oh my gosh, 332 00:14:56,560 --> 00:14:58,960 Speaker 3: what a dream. How lucky we are there have you? 333 00:14:59,600 --> 00:15:00,160 Speaker 4: Thank you? 334 00:15:00,160 --> 00:15:03,880 Speaker 3: You so talk to me about managing that relationship. And 335 00:15:03,920 --> 00:15:06,880 Speaker 3: obviously you're a little bit more headstrong when it comes 336 00:15:06,920 --> 00:15:09,680 Speaker 3: to setting goals and you're willing to compromise, you know, 337 00:15:10,120 --> 00:15:13,120 Speaker 3: food and other things so that you can achieve. How 338 00:15:13,160 --> 00:15:14,960 Speaker 3: do you manage that in a relationship, And, as you 339 00:15:15,000 --> 00:15:17,400 Speaker 3: said in your email, when you feel like sometimes you're 340 00:15:17,440 --> 00:15:19,720 Speaker 3: being the mum in the relationship. 341 00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:22,400 Speaker 5: So it's been hard. It's definitely not been easy. And 342 00:15:22,480 --> 00:15:24,920 Speaker 5: for the first couple of years we were both just 343 00:15:25,000 --> 00:15:27,400 Speaker 5: living week to week and having fun and going on 344 00:15:27,440 --> 00:15:30,200 Speaker 5: ad travels, et cetera. But then I think it kind 345 00:15:30,240 --> 00:15:31,800 Speaker 5: of got to a point where we were paying for 346 00:15:31,880 --> 00:15:35,200 Speaker 5: visas which were excessive amounts of money and having to 347 00:15:35,240 --> 00:15:36,080 Speaker 5: actually say. 348 00:15:35,960 --> 00:15:37,040 Speaker 4: For those sorts of things. 349 00:15:37,440 --> 00:15:40,160 Speaker 5: Yeah, okay, so we've never had a joint bank account. 350 00:15:40,160 --> 00:15:42,760 Speaker 5: That's something we've never done, and it's just worked for us. 351 00:15:42,800 --> 00:15:44,520 Speaker 5: I think if I could see what he was spending, 352 00:15:45,040 --> 00:15:48,920 Speaker 5: we probably wouldn't be together today. So it's been able 353 00:15:48,960 --> 00:15:53,120 Speaker 5: to balance that what he's spending and what he's doing, 354 00:15:53,160 --> 00:15:56,720 Speaker 5: but not controlling that. I guess something I've had to 355 00:15:56,800 --> 00:15:59,480 Speaker 5: sort of come to realization is is that he also works. 356 00:15:59,640 --> 00:16:02,720 Speaker 5: He's earning his own money, and it's as much as 357 00:16:02,760 --> 00:16:05,240 Speaker 5: I need him to contribute to the bills and mortgage, 358 00:16:05,240 --> 00:16:07,440 Speaker 5: and if he's not earning as much one week, we 359 00:16:07,480 --> 00:16:11,600 Speaker 5: still need to pay those I can't not tell him 360 00:16:11,600 --> 00:16:13,480 Speaker 5: to not enjoy the money that he's working hard for. 361 00:16:13,880 --> 00:16:16,960 Speaker 3: Yeah, And I guess that's a really important part of 362 00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:20,240 Speaker 3: it as well, because everybody's money story is so different. 363 00:16:20,640 --> 00:16:23,880 Speaker 3: But it's that feeling of am I being your mom? 364 00:16:23,960 --> 00:16:24,040 Speaker 4: Like? 365 00:16:24,120 --> 00:16:28,200 Speaker 3: Am I telling you what's going on? And it never 366 00:16:28,240 --> 00:16:30,680 Speaker 3: feels nice, right, Like we've all been in a situation 367 00:16:30,760 --> 00:16:32,880 Speaker 3: before where we're like, oh, I shouldn't have to do this. 368 00:16:33,400 --> 00:16:36,080 Speaker 3: So how do you manage those bigger goals? So you 369 00:16:36,120 --> 00:16:38,280 Speaker 3: mentioned before you've got a mortgage. I'm assuming that you 370 00:16:38,360 --> 00:16:41,240 Speaker 3: worked towards having a mortgage together. How did you manage 371 00:16:41,280 --> 00:16:44,280 Speaker 3: those big money goals in a relationship where you're like 372 00:16:44,360 --> 00:16:46,960 Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, I feel like I'm the one driving 373 00:16:47,000 --> 00:16:47,960 Speaker 3: this car. 374 00:16:48,400 --> 00:16:51,600 Speaker 5: So he's actually really easily manipulated. Is that fair to say? 375 00:16:52,880 --> 00:16:55,320 Speaker 3: I mean, that's probably not how I would want to 376 00:16:55,320 --> 00:16:58,000 Speaker 3: put it publicly, but so on the podcast now. 377 00:16:58,240 --> 00:17:00,840 Speaker 5: So for example, I might be like, oh, babe, let's 378 00:17:00,840 --> 00:17:02,760 Speaker 5: do this and look at buying the house, and he'll 379 00:17:02,760 --> 00:17:04,199 Speaker 5: be like, no, we can't afford it. And I'm like, oh, 380 00:17:04,280 --> 00:17:06,280 Speaker 5: let's just go look at some display homes this week, 381 00:17:06,560 --> 00:17:08,240 Speaker 5: and then a few weeks he's like. 382 00:17:08,480 --> 00:17:12,920 Speaker 4: Let's do it. So I plant receivers. 383 00:17:12,960 --> 00:17:16,600 Speaker 5: If it's his idea, well, really, it's all my idea, genius. 384 00:17:16,640 --> 00:17:19,600 Speaker 3: We won't let him listen to this podcast. Then we'll 385 00:17:19,640 --> 00:17:22,159 Speaker 3: be like, what are you talking about? That one's heard? 386 00:17:22,320 --> 00:17:25,480 Speaker 5: No, But I think we've tried a few different things 387 00:17:25,480 --> 00:17:26,800 Speaker 5: over here is but I think the best thing that's 388 00:17:26,800 --> 00:17:30,240 Speaker 5: worked for us is because he if the money sits 389 00:17:30,240 --> 00:17:32,680 Speaker 5: in his baying, it's gone it. Just like he could 390 00:17:32,680 --> 00:17:35,520 Speaker 5: get paid every week and it will just disappear. So 391 00:17:35,600 --> 00:17:38,840 Speaker 5: what we do is he will have he set spending money. 392 00:17:38,920 --> 00:17:41,040 Speaker 5: I'll let him sort of work out what he needs, 393 00:17:41,480 --> 00:17:44,400 Speaker 5: and then everything else goes over to my bank, so 394 00:17:44,520 --> 00:17:47,399 Speaker 5: I have control of the savings. I have control of 395 00:17:47,640 --> 00:17:49,399 Speaker 5: sort of paying all the I left him to pay 396 00:17:49,480 --> 00:17:52,840 Speaker 5: bills and there'd be left unpaid. So I pay all 397 00:17:52,840 --> 00:17:55,639 Speaker 5: the bills. I think he pays the electricity bill, that's 398 00:17:55,640 --> 00:18:00,199 Speaker 5: his one responsibility, and so he does contribute to all 399 00:18:00,280 --> 00:18:03,320 Speaker 5: that sort of stuff, but he doesn't see how it 400 00:18:03,359 --> 00:18:03,719 Speaker 5: goes up. 401 00:18:03,720 --> 00:18:04,520 Speaker 4: If that makes sense. 402 00:18:04,600 --> 00:18:08,080 Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, can I ask because I think this is 403 00:18:08,080 --> 00:18:10,360 Speaker 2: a really interesting way of doing it, and a lot 404 00:18:10,400 --> 00:18:12,560 Speaker 2: of people will be listening going, oh my gosh, like 405 00:18:13,000 --> 00:18:17,040 Speaker 2: my partners were saying, maybe a little bit less fiscally responsible. 406 00:18:17,520 --> 00:18:20,920 Speaker 2: How did you broach that conversation with your partner because 407 00:18:20,920 --> 00:18:23,439 Speaker 2: obviously you probably didn't want to turn around and be like, 408 00:18:23,680 --> 00:18:24,560 Speaker 2: I'm taking. 409 00:18:24,280 --> 00:18:26,840 Speaker 3: Control and you get no say was it? 410 00:18:26,880 --> 00:18:26,960 Speaker 4: So? 411 00:18:27,080 --> 00:18:29,119 Speaker 2: How did you come to the decision to manage it 412 00:18:29,119 --> 00:18:31,399 Speaker 2: this way? Does he check in at all? Or is 413 00:18:31,400 --> 00:18:32,560 Speaker 2: it fully left up to you? 414 00:18:33,160 --> 00:18:36,000 Speaker 5: Yeah, Look, we're very open anytime he wants to look 415 00:18:36,000 --> 00:18:38,800 Speaker 5: at it, it's there. It's nothing that's hidden with between us. 416 00:18:39,040 --> 00:18:42,000 Speaker 5: It's available to both of this. I think it's just 417 00:18:42,040 --> 00:18:43,600 Speaker 5: one of those ones. Over the years, I think it 418 00:18:43,640 --> 00:18:45,639 Speaker 5: probably still happens at least once a year we have 419 00:18:45,720 --> 00:18:48,960 Speaker 5: an argument over finance, and I just sit there and go, Okay, 420 00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:50,960 Speaker 5: I'm going to write down every single bill we pay, 421 00:18:51,040 --> 00:18:52,760 Speaker 5: and you can just pay me fifty percent of that. 422 00:18:53,440 --> 00:18:55,680 Speaker 5: Once he realizes how much all the bills actually paid, 423 00:18:55,720 --> 00:18:57,440 Speaker 5: because it does come up that, he goes, well, you're 424 00:18:57,480 --> 00:19:00,480 Speaker 5: just taking all the money sometimes, and I'm just giving 425 00:19:00,520 --> 00:19:06,280 Speaker 5: you the money. So his everything we pay and from 426 00:19:06,320 --> 00:19:09,040 Speaker 5: your income, we actually only contribute a little bit towards that. 427 00:19:09,560 --> 00:19:13,720 Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, And so when it comes to I guess 428 00:19:13,800 --> 00:19:16,520 Speaker 3: his side of the story, he's obviously not here, But 429 00:19:16,720 --> 00:19:19,399 Speaker 3: how do you think he feels about that? And having, 430 00:19:19,760 --> 00:19:22,359 Speaker 3: you know, just heard what you said. Sometimes he's just 431 00:19:22,400 --> 00:19:25,280 Speaker 3: clearly not privy to the amount of time, energy, and 432 00:19:25,320 --> 00:19:28,639 Speaker 3: effort that goes into managing household and managing bills and 433 00:19:28,680 --> 00:19:32,760 Speaker 3: getting things done. From his perspective, how do you think 434 00:19:32,800 --> 00:19:34,960 Speaker 3: he feels about this dynamic. 435 00:19:35,119 --> 00:19:37,080 Speaker 5: I think he's actually grateful for it. Look, we're very 436 00:19:37,200 --> 00:19:41,040 Speaker 5: open with each other. I think he knows, like he 437 00:19:41,160 --> 00:19:42,720 Speaker 5: was paying a few of the bills when we first 438 00:19:42,800 --> 00:19:46,480 Speaker 5: moved into the property, and we're getting the overdraft bills 439 00:19:46,520 --> 00:19:48,479 Speaker 5: and he's just like, oh, yeah, I forgot about that one. 440 00:19:48,520 --> 00:19:50,399 Speaker 5: I'm like, Okay, let's just put it all over to me. Like, 441 00:19:50,440 --> 00:19:52,639 Speaker 5: so we did try the whole You pay some bills, 442 00:19:52,640 --> 00:19:56,120 Speaker 5: I pay some bills, but he'd forget to pay him. 443 00:19:56,200 --> 00:19:58,399 Speaker 5: So I think he likes it. It's not he's not 444 00:19:58,400 --> 00:20:00,119 Speaker 5: having to deal with that, But I think it's it's 445 00:20:00,119 --> 00:20:01,960 Speaker 5: the balance that we've perhaps to try and establish. 446 00:20:02,200 --> 00:20:04,960 Speaker 4: Is me getting annoyed with him for spending so much 447 00:20:04,960 --> 00:20:05,399 Speaker 4: on crap? 448 00:20:05,880 --> 00:20:09,600 Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, and that's like then in his value set 449 00:20:09,920 --> 00:20:12,439 Speaker 3: to want to continue to do that. So he's like, no, 450 00:20:12,600 --> 00:20:15,199 Speaker 3: I'm going to continue to enjoy my life. What do 451 00:20:15,240 --> 00:20:19,040 Speaker 3: you mean? I feel like that's such a common situation, 452 00:20:19,200 --> 00:20:21,720 Speaker 3: and it's always like ying and yang, right, like one 453 00:20:21,760 --> 00:20:24,119 Speaker 3: person's really good at money and the others not so 454 00:20:24,320 --> 00:20:27,120 Speaker 3: on it. And like I feel like Jess, you said 455 00:20:27,160 --> 00:20:30,000 Speaker 3: it before, like fiscally responsible is a nice way to 456 00:20:30,040 --> 00:20:33,160 Speaker 3: say it. But I'm in a similar relationship. But I 457 00:20:33,200 --> 00:20:36,679 Speaker 3: am so money focused, Like I'm a financial advisor. I 458 00:20:36,680 --> 00:20:38,960 Speaker 3: love a budget, I love sitting down with it. My 459 00:20:39,080 --> 00:20:42,639 Speaker 3: partner couldn't care less about my budgets, like money does 460 00:20:42,800 --> 00:20:46,719 Speaker 3: I have. I've built tools, I have like done epic 461 00:20:46,840 --> 00:20:49,600 Speaker 3: budgets like and I am so excited about them. And 462 00:20:49,640 --> 00:20:51,320 Speaker 3: I do them. I'm like, this is how we're going 463 00:20:51,400 --> 00:20:52,880 Speaker 3: to set goals, this is how we're going to work 464 00:20:52,880 --> 00:20:55,920 Speaker 3: towards them. He's like cool, Like no, but look how 465 00:20:55,920 --> 00:20:58,800 Speaker 3: exciting it is. And he's like no. So I just 466 00:20:59,040 --> 00:21:02,320 Speaker 3: I totally resonate with being on a different page with 467 00:21:02,359 --> 00:21:04,960 Speaker 3: your partner. But I think I would struggle if I 468 00:21:05,000 --> 00:21:07,720 Speaker 3: felt like I was being his mum. But at the 469 00:21:07,800 --> 00:21:10,720 Speaker 3: same time, I can totally see that if you've had 470 00:21:10,760 --> 00:21:14,120 Speaker 3: a different upbringing and you've had a different money story, 471 00:21:14,440 --> 00:21:17,399 Speaker 3: how that fits. I don't mean to be too pervy. 472 00:21:17,400 --> 00:21:20,320 Speaker 3: I'm asking so many relationship questions, but at the start 473 00:21:20,400 --> 00:21:23,840 Speaker 3: of your relationship, was that a big friction point? And 474 00:21:23,880 --> 00:21:25,800 Speaker 3: how did you like come to go? Do you know what? 475 00:21:25,840 --> 00:21:27,920 Speaker 3: That's just how he is. He has a different money 476 00:21:27,960 --> 00:21:30,200 Speaker 3: story to me. I'm going to manage it this way. 477 00:21:31,560 --> 00:21:33,560 Speaker 5: No, Because I think when we first met, we were 478 00:21:33,600 --> 00:21:36,119 Speaker 5: traveling and we will continue to do some tabling together 479 00:21:36,400 --> 00:21:39,400 Speaker 5: and go to different places, etc. So we were kind 480 00:21:39,400 --> 00:21:41,960 Speaker 5: of just put in in and we were both working 481 00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:44,919 Speaker 5: sort of casual jobs, so it was never really a 482 00:21:44,960 --> 00:21:47,640 Speaker 5: big deal. I think it became sort of more obvious 483 00:21:47,760 --> 00:21:50,560 Speaker 5: maybe about four years in when we're applying for visas 484 00:21:50,920 --> 00:21:53,479 Speaker 5: and we were having to save ten thousand dollars fifteen 485 00:21:53,520 --> 00:21:56,719 Speaker 5: thousand dollars upfront that we didn't have. So when I'm 486 00:21:56,760 --> 00:21:58,479 Speaker 5: trying to save all the money and stressing because we've 487 00:21:58,520 --> 00:22:00,360 Speaker 5: got a timeline to pay for a visa and he's 488 00:22:00,359 --> 00:22:03,280 Speaker 5: spending all his money every week, then that wasn't a 489 00:22:03,359 --> 00:22:06,360 Speaker 5: great experience. And I think that's where, Okay, we need 490 00:22:06,400 --> 00:22:08,400 Speaker 5: to you need to step up on this. 491 00:22:08,720 --> 00:22:11,960 Speaker 3: Oh gosh. And so how have you guys? Obviously you 492 00:22:11,960 --> 00:22:15,440 Speaker 3: said you have an argument maybe once a year about this. 493 00:22:15,920 --> 00:22:19,080 Speaker 3: Has that become commonplace or did you used to argue 494 00:22:19,080 --> 00:22:21,080 Speaker 3: a lot more about money and now it's just like 495 00:22:21,280 --> 00:22:23,520 Speaker 3: once you have a big blow up and you can 496 00:22:23,600 --> 00:22:25,840 Speaker 3: tell him, sit down, I'm gonna tell you how it is, 497 00:22:26,080 --> 00:22:28,000 Speaker 3: and then he goes all right back in my box, 498 00:22:28,560 --> 00:22:30,720 Speaker 3: let's do it. I'll let you, I'll let you do it. 499 00:22:31,119 --> 00:22:33,399 Speaker 3: So was that more common historically? 500 00:22:33,640 --> 00:22:35,320 Speaker 5: It was definitely a lot more common. I think because 501 00:22:35,320 --> 00:22:38,600 Speaker 5: we're a bit more financially stable now, we're not as stressed, 502 00:22:39,240 --> 00:22:42,280 Speaker 5: which makes things a bit more relaxed. So before I 503 00:22:42,320 --> 00:22:44,800 Speaker 5: started listening to your podcast, we actually took out some 504 00:22:44,840 --> 00:22:48,040 Speaker 5: of our super and I don't regret it now because 505 00:22:48,040 --> 00:22:50,160 Speaker 5: I've actually I only let him spend maybe. We saw 506 00:22:50,160 --> 00:22:52,200 Speaker 5: all our friends blow in the full ten thousand dollars, 507 00:22:52,200 --> 00:22:54,000 Speaker 5: and I think I let him spend maybe, Well, he 508 00:22:54,040 --> 00:22:56,159 Speaker 5: spent about one thousand, but the rest of it is 509 00:22:56,160 --> 00:22:59,240 Speaker 5: still sitting in I read raw for our mortgage, so. 510 00:22:59,280 --> 00:23:00,920 Speaker 3: Not with worse thing to happen. 511 00:23:00,960 --> 00:23:03,080 Speaker 5: Yeah, so at least it's offset in our mortgage rather 512 00:23:03,119 --> 00:23:06,359 Speaker 5: than just going down the drain. But he was also 513 00:23:06,400 --> 00:23:09,280 Speaker 5: in the situation of okay, yep, no, we need to 514 00:23:09,280 --> 00:23:11,320 Speaker 5: put some aside. We can't just go and spend it all. 515 00:23:11,320 --> 00:23:15,080 Speaker 5: So he's also changed his his money though that CA's 516 00:23:15,080 --> 00:23:16,560 Speaker 5: definitely become a lot more frugal. 517 00:23:16,720 --> 00:23:19,040 Speaker 4: So the car loan that we've got is actually his 518 00:23:19,440 --> 00:23:20,040 Speaker 4: for his car. 519 00:23:20,359 --> 00:23:22,680 Speaker 5: But I said to him, we're not getting it unless 520 00:23:22,680 --> 00:23:24,919 Speaker 5: you get a good interest rate. So he actually I 521 00:23:24,960 --> 00:23:28,639 Speaker 5: made him go around comparing interest rates and then we 522 00:23:28,720 --> 00:23:30,160 Speaker 5: found a good one, and then he's taking it back 523 00:23:30,160 --> 00:23:32,520 Speaker 5: to the car dealership making them price for it. 524 00:23:32,960 --> 00:23:35,960 Speaker 3: Yeah, that's fair. That's fair. And I think that it's 525 00:23:36,040 --> 00:23:39,960 Speaker 3: so important to delegate as well in a relationship, because 526 00:23:39,960 --> 00:23:42,239 Speaker 3: a relationship, I think a lot of people are like 527 00:23:42,400 --> 00:23:44,679 Speaker 3: it's always fifty to fifty, and that's not the case. 528 00:23:44,720 --> 00:23:49,360 Speaker 3: Sometimes it is sixty forty or seventy thirty in different 529 00:23:49,440 --> 00:23:51,679 Speaker 3: ways shapes or forms like And I'm sure that there 530 00:23:51,680 --> 00:23:54,119 Speaker 3: are other places in your relationship that he's pulling the 531 00:23:54,160 --> 00:23:56,879 Speaker 3: weight and you're just on the money side. But I 532 00:23:56,920 --> 00:24:00,320 Speaker 3: think it's really important to understand that sometimes need to 533 00:24:00,320 --> 00:24:02,600 Speaker 3: take a step back and be like, no, I'm actually 534 00:24:02,680 --> 00:24:04,160 Speaker 3: not your mum. If you want you a new car, 535 00:24:04,320 --> 00:24:06,400 Speaker 3: go and do the right thing, and then we can 536 00:24:06,440 --> 00:24:09,639 Speaker 3: make that decision. But I think that sometimes you end 537 00:24:09,720 --> 00:24:12,040 Speaker 3: up a bit disappointed when you do that, because if 538 00:24:12,040 --> 00:24:14,119 Speaker 3: they don't really want it, they're not going to do 539 00:24:14,200 --> 00:24:16,160 Speaker 3: the hard yards and they're not going to pull their 540 00:24:16,200 --> 00:24:18,040 Speaker 3: finger out and get it done. And that can be 541 00:24:18,200 --> 00:24:21,800 Speaker 3: even more frustrating because you're like, I gave you one job. 542 00:24:22,200 --> 00:24:25,400 Speaker 5: Yeah, And I think he like, I think five years 543 00:24:25,440 --> 00:24:28,080 Speaker 5: ago it would look very different there. I think now 544 00:24:28,080 --> 00:24:29,639 Speaker 5: that we've sort of got the hairs and stuff, he 545 00:24:29,720 --> 00:24:32,440 Speaker 5: can see all the sacrifices we make in the outcomes 546 00:24:32,440 --> 00:24:33,640 Speaker 5: of those wheres. 547 00:24:33,680 --> 00:24:34,439 Speaker 4: I think five years. 548 00:24:34,280 --> 00:24:36,639 Speaker 5: Ago he could never see, oh, why are we saving 549 00:24:36,720 --> 00:24:40,000 Speaker 5: and he'd never understand why you needed savings. Whereas now 550 00:24:40,119 --> 00:24:42,680 Speaker 5: he can see that we can go on holidays, or 551 00:24:42,800 --> 00:24:44,840 Speaker 5: we've got a halfs or we've got a dog. He 552 00:24:44,880 --> 00:24:47,159 Speaker 5: can see how those can add up. 553 00:24:47,359 --> 00:24:49,880 Speaker 3: Yeah, and what's the plan for the future, Like where 554 00:24:49,880 --> 00:24:52,480 Speaker 3: are we going with this? What are your money goals 555 00:24:52,480 --> 00:24:54,240 Speaker 3: together in the future looking like? 556 00:24:54,400 --> 00:24:56,320 Speaker 5: Yes, as I mentioned, the goal for us at the 557 00:24:56,320 --> 00:25:00,000 Speaker 5: moment is obviously children, so we will need to have IBS. 558 00:25:01,320 --> 00:25:05,119 Speaker 5: So it's and that's something we're saving towards, putting aside, 559 00:25:05,160 --> 00:25:09,760 Speaker 5: getting ready for that, and then yeah, that's probably hopefully 560 00:25:09,760 --> 00:25:11,040 Speaker 5: what twenty twenty two will bring. 561 00:25:11,400 --> 00:25:13,680 Speaker 3: And talk to me a little bit about the IVF 562 00:25:13,760 --> 00:25:17,159 Speaker 3: process if you wouldn't mind. How far down that track 563 00:25:17,160 --> 00:25:20,480 Speaker 3: are you, Like you've said, we know we'll need it, Yeah, 564 00:25:20,520 --> 00:25:22,320 Speaker 3: do you know how much it's going to cost? Like, 565 00:25:22,400 --> 00:25:24,120 Speaker 3: have you started budgeting for that? 566 00:25:24,440 --> 00:25:24,640 Speaker 4: Yeah? 567 00:25:24,680 --> 00:25:27,200 Speaker 5: So we were seeing a fertility clinic. We've been seeing 568 00:25:27,240 --> 00:25:31,480 Speaker 5: a fertility doctor for probably about two two to three years, 569 00:25:31,720 --> 00:25:33,320 Speaker 5: and it's never been urgent for us. We're not in 570 00:25:33,320 --> 00:25:36,840 Speaker 5: any rush, so it's never been crisis. But we tried IUI, 571 00:25:36,960 --> 00:25:39,000 Speaker 5: which is sort of a lower cost version of IBF 572 00:25:39,000 --> 00:25:41,640 Speaker 5: in a bit more less invasive. So we'd done two 573 00:25:41,720 --> 00:25:45,560 Speaker 5: rounds of that that wasn't successful. We were costs that 574 00:25:45,840 --> 00:25:48,040 Speaker 5: was worked out about twelve hundred dollars around. 575 00:25:48,520 --> 00:25:51,520 Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, that's still so expensive. 576 00:25:51,800 --> 00:25:53,280 Speaker 4: And not to be successful. 577 00:25:53,320 --> 00:25:56,760 Speaker 5: So then we were sort of okay, finally psyched ourself 578 00:25:56,840 --> 00:25:58,679 Speaker 5: up there back mid last year to go, okay, let's 579 00:25:58,800 --> 00:26:01,320 Speaker 5: we're going to go for IBFLX to do it. Through 580 00:26:01,359 --> 00:26:04,399 Speaker 5: the routine tests that we've done because it's been a 581 00:26:04,440 --> 00:26:08,160 Speaker 5: few years, I've actually found a diagnosis of hydro sul phoenix, 582 00:26:08,640 --> 00:26:11,840 Speaker 5: which means I've got block tubes. So that actually stops 583 00:26:12,640 --> 00:26:14,240 Speaker 5: it being a natural birth, So I won't ever be 584 00:26:14,280 --> 00:26:18,720 Speaker 5: able to have children naturally, so fut chat will be ibf. 585 00:26:18,560 --> 00:26:23,000 Speaker 3: Yep, So that stops your like sorry, just to like 586 00:26:23,160 --> 00:26:25,640 Speaker 3: that's okay, just to work it out. Does that mean 587 00:26:25,680 --> 00:26:28,080 Speaker 3: that the egg can't come down and then you can't 588 00:26:28,119 --> 00:26:31,360 Speaker 3: have a baby natch, Like you can't conceive naturally, right, 589 00:26:31,440 --> 00:26:33,639 Speaker 3: but you could carry a pregnancy. 590 00:26:33,760 --> 00:26:34,000 Speaker 4: Yeah. 591 00:26:34,040 --> 00:26:35,560 Speaker 5: So I'm actually on the way in this with the 592 00:26:35,560 --> 00:26:38,879 Speaker 5: hospital for surgery. Well I'm waiting for an appointment, so 593 00:26:38,960 --> 00:26:42,480 Speaker 5: then I'll have to have surgery to have my tumbes removed. Wow, 594 00:26:42,800 --> 00:26:45,920 Speaker 5: So that means that we will only wait be able 595 00:26:45,960 --> 00:26:49,320 Speaker 5: to carry is through IBF, so we're looking out between 596 00:26:50,240 --> 00:26:53,160 Speaker 5: five to eight grand I believe it's going to cough 597 00:26:53,320 --> 00:26:54,159 Speaker 5: per rand. 598 00:26:54,359 --> 00:26:59,919 Speaker 3: Around so expensive. It's such a big investment that women 599 00:27:00,160 --> 00:27:04,359 Speaker 3: have to undertake, couples have to undertake, to go through 600 00:27:04,400 --> 00:27:06,720 Speaker 3: a process that you know when you're growing up, you 601 00:27:06,840 --> 00:27:10,199 Speaker 3: just assume it's going to be really easy. And you know, 602 00:27:10,240 --> 00:27:11,920 Speaker 3: I've got a lot of friends who are going through 603 00:27:11,920 --> 00:27:15,320 Speaker 3: IVF at the moment. And it's not just the finance 604 00:27:15,359 --> 00:27:18,679 Speaker 3: side of things. It's mentally taxing, it's physically taxing. Like 605 00:27:18,960 --> 00:27:22,520 Speaker 3: I don't think people realize the impact of IVF because 606 00:27:22,680 --> 00:27:25,359 Speaker 3: you're on all these hormones and you feel gross and 607 00:27:25,400 --> 00:27:28,720 Speaker 3: you feel bloated and you feel moody, and it's just 608 00:27:29,119 --> 00:27:31,520 Speaker 3: such an undertaking. So I'm always in awe of women 609 00:27:31,520 --> 00:27:34,040 Speaker 3: who are like, no, I'm going through this process, Like 610 00:27:34,680 --> 00:27:38,120 Speaker 3: power to you, Like that is so cool, And when 611 00:27:38,160 --> 00:27:40,159 Speaker 3: you do have a baby, this baby is going to 612 00:27:40,160 --> 00:27:43,159 Speaker 3: be so loved and so wanted, Like how cool that 613 00:27:43,200 --> 00:27:45,040 Speaker 3: we live in a world where you get that option 614 00:27:45,440 --> 00:27:48,680 Speaker 3: instead of like sorry, it's you just can't feel pregnant. 615 00:27:49,119 --> 00:27:52,600 Speaker 3: So I'm grateful it exists, but honestly it should be 616 00:27:52,760 --> 00:27:56,840 Speaker 3: so much cheaper, Like, oh, how disappointing that you know 617 00:27:57,000 --> 00:28:01,200 Speaker 3: it's going to impact us so significantly. Fine, actually agreed, 618 00:28:01,280 --> 00:28:02,160 Speaker 3: and it's Yeah. 619 00:28:02,200 --> 00:28:04,080 Speaker 5: At least one thing I'm grateful for is that I 620 00:28:04,119 --> 00:28:06,120 Speaker 5: found this out before we did the first round, because 621 00:28:06,119 --> 00:28:08,200 Speaker 5: if we'd gone ahead and done IBF before we found 622 00:28:08,240 --> 00:28:10,240 Speaker 5: this out, we would have been at all that money 623 00:28:10,240 --> 00:28:13,800 Speaker 5: and that it wouldn't have been successfulsh. 624 00:28:12,640 --> 00:28:15,520 Speaker 3: And is that something that is pretty common, like people 625 00:28:15,560 --> 00:28:17,879 Speaker 3: will do IVF and not have had the testing and 626 00:28:17,960 --> 00:28:19,399 Speaker 3: it being a waste of money. 627 00:28:19,440 --> 00:28:20,560 Speaker 4: I think they've had the testing. 628 00:28:20,640 --> 00:28:24,040 Speaker 5: In my case, it had progressed over the years, so 629 00:28:24,760 --> 00:28:26,720 Speaker 5: it was something that wasn't picked up several years ago 630 00:28:26,840 --> 00:28:30,399 Speaker 5: because it was probably in a I guess smile condition. 631 00:28:30,520 --> 00:28:33,159 Speaker 5: Then yeah, but then when we've redone the testing, So 632 00:28:33,920 --> 00:28:36,440 Speaker 5: I guess something I would say to people is get 633 00:28:36,480 --> 00:28:38,920 Speaker 5: all everything checked before you go straight down that rat 634 00:28:38,960 --> 00:28:42,280 Speaker 5: because if you don't do your tube testing, as an example, 635 00:28:43,000 --> 00:28:45,280 Speaker 5: you could spend all that money and then that'd be 636 00:28:45,320 --> 00:28:46,160 Speaker 5: the issue the whole time. 637 00:28:46,440 --> 00:28:49,480 Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, well that is a really really good 638 00:28:49,560 --> 00:28:52,040 Speaker 3: tip money DRISD. I think that is actually all we 639 00:28:52,160 --> 00:28:54,920 Speaker 3: have time for today. But thank you so much for 640 00:28:55,000 --> 00:28:57,800 Speaker 3: coming on the show and sharing your story and your journey. 641 00:28:57,840 --> 00:29:02,280 Speaker 3: I'm honestly so grateful for like ah, we are so lucky. 642 00:29:02,840 --> 00:29:04,200 Speaker 4: Thank you well. 643 00:29:04,200 --> 00:29:06,680 Speaker 3: Before we head off, we'd like to acknowledge and pay 644 00:29:06,760 --> 00:29:10,400 Speaker 3: respect to Australia's Aboriginal and to Horror Strait islander peoples. 645 00:29:10,640 --> 00:29:14,000 Speaker 3: They're the traditional custodians of the lands, the waterways and 646 00:29:14,040 --> 00:29:17,720 Speaker 3: the skies all across Australia. We thank you for sharing 647 00:29:17,760 --> 00:29:19,920 Speaker 3: and for caring for the land on which we are 648 00:29:20,000 --> 00:29:23,720 Speaker 3: able to learn. We pay respects to elders past and present, 649 00:29:23,800 --> 00:29:26,360 Speaker 3: and we share our friendship and our kindness. 650 00:29:26,520 --> 00:29:28,920 Speaker 2: The advice shared on Shees on the Money is generally 651 00:29:29,080 --> 00:29:32,520 Speaker 2: nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. Shared on 652 00:29:32,560 --> 00:29:35,320 Speaker 2: the Money exists purely for educational purposes and should not 653 00:29:35,360 --> 00:29:38,160 Speaker 2: be relied upon to make an investment or a financial decision. 654 00:29:38,560 --> 00:29:41,800 Speaker 2: And we promise Victoria Devine is an author prize representative 655 00:29:41,840 --> 00:29:45,920 Speaker 2: of Australia Pacific Funds Management Proprietary Limited ABM three four 656 00:29:46,000 --> 00:29:48,640 Speaker 2: one pre two four six three two five seven so 657 00:29:49,040 --> 00:29:51,320 Speaker 2: three three nine one five to one And if you 658 00:29:51,440 --> 00:29:55,520 Speaker 2: enjoyed this episode, don't forget to rate review maybe Chuck 659 00:29:55,640 --> 00:29:58,280 Speaker 2: is a follow on Instagram. Join the community on Facebook. 660 00:29:58,320 --> 00:30:00,920 Speaker 2: We're anywhere and everywhere. Come hang out with us. 661 00:30:01,160 --> 00:30:04,760 Speaker 3: We call kids, come hang out. See you next week, guys, 662 00:30:04,880 --> 00:30:09,000 Speaker 3: fie