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Speaker 1: It's the Happy Families Podcast. We are so grateful that

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Speaker 1: you have chosen to listen to the Happy Families Podcast today.

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Speaker 1: Thank you for joining us. Every Friday on the podcast,

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Speaker 1: we do a segment that we call Old Do Better Tomorrow.

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Speaker 1: For those of you who are new, and we have

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Speaker 1: had so many new subscribers to the podcast, thank you

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Speaker 1: for being here. The Old Do Better Tomorrow segment is

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Speaker 1: essentially Kylie and I are reflecting on the week that

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Speaker 1: was and trying to identify what went well or what didn't,

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Speaker 1: or what we can learn from the week so that

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Speaker 1: we can be more intentional as parents moving forward. Now

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Speaker 1: you're probably aware by now that it's been a pretty

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Speaker 1: heavy couple of weeks in our home and in our family.

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Speaker 1: Just before Kylie begins with her story her Old Do

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Speaker 1: Better Tomorrow, I wanted to reflect on something and just

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Speaker 1: highlight so I shared a post on Facebook and Instagram

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Speaker 1: last week that shared the news of the tragic passing

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Speaker 1: of our nephew. I checked with my family before I

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Speaker 1: wrote it. I didn't want to write something that was

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Speaker 1: not going to be approved of by them to post,

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Speaker 1: and in fact, when I wrote it, I said, I

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Speaker 1: don't just want you to say it's fine post it.

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Speaker 1: I want you to tell me that you need me

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Speaker 1: to post it. I want you to encourage me to

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Speaker 1: post it. It has to be that good and that important.

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Speaker 1: And so when I shared the news, what I really

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Speaker 1: wanted to do was focus not just on the tragedy.

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Speaker 1: Anybody could do that, but I really wanted to focus

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Speaker 1: on how it can help, what we can do in

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Speaker 1: our families, what we can do with our loved ones

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Speaker 1: to help them to know that they are loved, and

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Speaker 1: to help them to choose to talk to us rather

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Speaker 1: than taking tragic and drastic actions. As a result of

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Speaker 1: that post, more than two point six million people engaged

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Speaker 1: with what I shared, more than one hundred and seventy

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Speaker 1: thousand people reacted, more than twenty thousand people commented, and

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Speaker 1: more than eighteen thousand people shared the news. My family

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Speaker 1: wanted me to make sure that you knew how much

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Speaker 1: we appreciate the fact that not just were you touched

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Speaker 1: by what I shared, but that you felt to act

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Speaker 1: on it and to share it and to do something

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Speaker 1: about making your relationships stronger. Thank you for honoring the

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Speaker 1: message that we shared, and we so very much hope

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Speaker 1: that it helped The funeral for Logan will be today.

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Speaker 1: Once this podcast drops, will be jumping in the car

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Speaker 1: and heading off to be with the family so that

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Speaker 1: we can reflect on and memorialize his life, and normal

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Speaker 1: podcast programming will resume on Monday. We need to talk

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Speaker 1: about more than this, as important as this is, but Kylie,

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Speaker 1: for today's I'll Do Better Tomorrow, I'd love for you

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Speaker 1: to kick us off and share the story or the

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Speaker 1: experience that you've had this week that has helped you

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Speaker 1: to be a better parent.

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Speaker 2: After you posted on Tuesday, I got a phone call

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Speaker 2: from one of my closest friends who was just devastated

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Speaker 2: by the news, and she just wanted me to know

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Speaker 2: that she really appreciated the courage it took for you

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Speaker 2: to share what you shared, but that it had already

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Speaker 2: made a difference in her life. Over the last few months,

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Speaker 2: she's been really, really struggling with one of her children,

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Speaker 2: and she said she read that post and she just knew,

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Speaker 2: no matter what was going on with them, she needed

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Speaker 2: her child to know that he was loved. And she

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Speaker 2: went into his room and she just grabbed him into

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Speaker 2: a great, big bear hug and just held him and

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Speaker 2: she said he was so shocked because it's not something

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Speaker 2: that they would normally do, and she was able to

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Speaker 2: talk to him and share with him what she'd read

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Speaker 2: and just how important it was for him to know that,

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Speaker 2: in spite of how much challenged their experience, at the moment,

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Speaker 2: that he was loved. And it was a beautiful segue

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Speaker 2: into a conversation we had at the dinner table with

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Speaker 2: our children. Normally, when we sit around the dinner table,

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Speaker 2: we usually share grateful things together, and as we were

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Speaker 2: talking about the experience and letting the children kind of

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Speaker 2: share some feelings about what we've been experiencing, it was

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Speaker 2: our little nine year old Emily who piped up and said,

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Speaker 2: I don't really want to do grateful things tonight. I

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Speaker 2: actually want to find out how you feel loved. And

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Speaker 2: it never sees us to amaze me. Our little children

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Speaker 2: are just so in tune. And so we had this

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Speaker 2: opportunity as a family to just sit around and share

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Speaker 2: the things that help us individually feel love. And as

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Speaker 2: we did that, there was just this greater feeling of

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Speaker 2: love in our home and it was really.

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Speaker 1: Beautiful, extraordinary the way tragic galvanizeres love, and that that

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Speaker 1: was a night that I think we'll always remember because

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Speaker 1: of the way that she responded, the way that she

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Speaker 1: recognized that we just need to affirm and reassure one

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Speaker 1: another of our love and the irreversible and unconditional way

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Speaker 1: that we need to love one another. I love that story.

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Speaker 1: I hope that to not as families set around tables,

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Speaker 1: rather than talking about grateful things, maybe they might share

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Speaker 1: how they know that they're loved as well. Kylie My

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Speaker 1: I'll do better Tomorrow is something that builds on the

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Speaker 1: legacy of Logan. As I spent time with my family

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Speaker 1: in the immediate aftermath of his death. I spent some

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Speaker 1: time on the New South Wales Central Coast, which is

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Speaker 1: where they all are, where he died, where Mum and

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Speaker 1: Dad live, and myself and my siblings all pretty much

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Speaker 1: stayed at mum and Dad's for a few nights and

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Speaker 1: really spent some time involved in conversation and being together

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Speaker 1: as a family. It was something that I was really

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Speaker 1: grateful to be able to do, really really special time.

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Speaker 1: A story was shared during that that I didn't know

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Speaker 1: about Logan, and it was funny because as soon as

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Speaker 1: I heard it, I realized that i'd heard it before.

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Speaker 1: I'd recognized it, but I'd never joined the dots and

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Speaker 1: put it all together.

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Speaker 2: When I think in the moment, it's it's just who

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Speaker 2: he was.

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Speaker 1: It's just who he was, It's just how he was. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and here's how he was. My brother pointed it out.

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Speaker 1: When somebody said I love you as the night wrapped up,

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Speaker 1: he looked at them and said, nah, I love you, Tim,

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Speaker 1: and he got a funny look, and my sister said, okay,

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Speaker 1: I love you Tim, And then Tim said, have you

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Speaker 1: ever noticed did you ever realize that whenever anybody said

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Speaker 1: I love you Logan, Order would always correct it and

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Speaker 1: ask for the name, ask for his name to be said.

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Speaker 1: In fact, he was the one who always ran out

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Speaker 1: the door and said love you Nan, I love you Pop,

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Speaker 1: or love you Uncle jud or whatever, love you whoever

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Speaker 1: it was. But he always said their name. And if

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Speaker 1: they called out love you as he left, he would

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Speaker 1: stop and say, nah, love you Logan, and he would

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Speaker 1: make them say his name. And when I came home,

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Speaker 1: I sat down with you and the kids and I said,

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Speaker 1: I think that this is a beautiful legacy. I think

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Speaker 1: that it is something that we can do in not

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Speaker 1: just in order to honor the legacy of logan, but

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Speaker 1: maybe even to make our family feel closer and stronger.

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Speaker 1: And for the last week or so, every time we've

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Speaker 1: said I love you, we've added the person's name to

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Speaker 1: the end of the sentence. And I haven't realized until

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Speaker 1: now just how much more beautiful that is, and how

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Speaker 1: much I love hearing my name at the end of

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Speaker 1: that sentence. You've started saying it all the time. Instead

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Speaker 1: of just I love you, you've been saying I love

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Speaker 1: you justin And there's something so beautiful and so powerful

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Speaker 1: and so profound about that extra couple of syllables on

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Speaker 1: the end of that sentence.

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Speaker 2: It's interesting. The kids will always say I love you mommy,

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Speaker 2: or I love you mum, But since you've shared that,

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Speaker 2: the weight of hearing my name or my title at

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Speaker 2: the end of that sentence has really hit me a

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Speaker 2: lot more.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's just beautiful. So that is our I'll do

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Speaker 1: better tomorrow. I hope that it's celebratory. I hope that

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Speaker 1: it recognizes that in the very depths of tragedy and

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Speaker 1: sorrow and grief, we can find beauty, we can find love.

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Speaker 1: Maybe in wrapping up, I can share one of my

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Speaker 1: favorite ideas It came from a therapist that I was

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Speaker 1: listening to a podcast on some months ago, and she

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Speaker 1: just said joy. Her definition of joy. Joy is found

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Speaker 1: anywhere where there is something to be grateful for. And

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Speaker 1: so as we farewell a beloved family member today, I

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Speaker 1: feel beautiful gratitude, so much appreciation for these little lessons

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Speaker 1: that we've had in our home this week as a

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Speaker 1: result of him. And as a result of that, I

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Speaker 1: believe that today, while we will sorrow, that we may

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Speaker 1: feel solace because there is joy as we express and

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Speaker 1: appreciate him for what he taught us. The Happy Family's

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Speaker 1: podcast is produced by Justin ruland Craig Bruce is our

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Speaker 1: executive producer. For more about making a family happier, you

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Speaker 1: can visit our website, Happy families dot com dot you

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Speaker 1: are our Facebook page Dr Justin Colson's Happy Families. But really,

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Speaker 1: all you need to do is say I love you,

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Speaker 1: and at the person's name the end sentence, embrace them

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Speaker 1: in a great, big bear hug and talk to them

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Speaker 1: about how you know you're loved and ask them how

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Speaker 1: they know they're loved. Have a wonderful weekend, and we'll

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Speaker 1: be with you again.

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Speaker 2: A monthly

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Speaker 1: H