1 00:00:04,120 --> 00:00:06,519 Speaker 1: It's the Happy Families podcast. 2 00:00:07,080 --> 00:00:10,320 Speaker 2: It's the podcast for the time poor parent who just 3 00:00:10,440 --> 00:00:11,320 Speaker 2: wants answers. 4 00:00:11,400 --> 00:00:11,640 Speaker 1: Now. 5 00:00:14,240 --> 00:00:16,479 Speaker 3: Yesterday, I'm a Happy Families podcast. Kylie, you and I 6 00:00:16,560 --> 00:00:19,120 Speaker 3: made a very big deal, a very big deal about 7 00:00:19,120 --> 00:00:21,680 Speaker 3: how we were well. I was buying back into what 8 00:00:21,720 --> 00:00:23,160 Speaker 3: do you call it again, Oh, Halloween. 9 00:00:23,280 --> 00:00:25,560 Speaker 2: That's right, just saying I was making a big deal 10 00:00:25,560 --> 00:00:27,360 Speaker 2: about it. You are the one who made promise. 11 00:00:27,560 --> 00:00:29,240 Speaker 3: I got caught up at the moment, didn't I. You did, 12 00:00:29,360 --> 00:00:31,840 Speaker 3: And shortly after the podcast went to air, I looked 13 00:00:31,880 --> 00:00:34,440 Speaker 3: at you and said, no, no, we're not doing it 14 00:00:34,479 --> 00:00:36,839 Speaker 3: after all. So we let the neighborhood down. This used 15 00:00:36,840 --> 00:00:40,159 Speaker 3: to be the Halloween House. No Halloween, but I did 16 00:00:40,240 --> 00:00:42,760 Speaker 3: take Emily out for a community trunk or treat that 17 00:00:42,800 --> 00:00:45,680 Speaker 3: I found happening, and that was fun. That was fun, 18 00:00:46,520 --> 00:00:49,760 Speaker 3: And that's all I have to say about it. I'm 19 00:00:49,760 --> 00:00:52,400 Speaker 3: not going to say anything else, too much, sugar, but 20 00:00:52,440 --> 00:00:53,800 Speaker 3: it nice to be in the community and nice to 21 00:00:53,840 --> 00:00:56,000 Speaker 3: say hi to some people and that kind of thing. 22 00:00:56,040 --> 00:00:58,440 Speaker 3: So I just I felt like, in the interest of integrity, 23 00:00:58,440 --> 00:01:01,360 Speaker 3: I needed to highlight that Halloween happened, but not quite 24 00:01:01,400 --> 00:01:03,360 Speaker 3: the way that we said it would. Yesterday on the podcast. 25 00:01:03,520 --> 00:01:05,479 Speaker 2: Well, today is all about I'll do better tomorrow. 26 00:01:05,600 --> 00:01:08,920 Speaker 3: So am I supposed to do better next year for Halloween? 27 00:01:08,959 --> 00:01:09,640 Speaker 3: Is that what you're saying. 28 00:01:10,680 --> 00:01:16,160 Speaker 2: Yes, you're making some big admissions and commitments. 29 00:01:17,200 --> 00:01:18,920 Speaker 3: Two things that I want to bring up before we 30 00:01:18,959 --> 00:01:21,920 Speaker 3: dive into older better Tomorrow today. The first is that 31 00:01:22,200 --> 00:01:25,920 Speaker 3: last Saturday, you and I spoke at a conference in 32 00:01:25,959 --> 00:01:28,440 Speaker 3: a room full of about two hundred and sixty two 33 00:01:28,480 --> 00:01:31,280 Speaker 3: hundred and seventy dads. It was a room full of men. 34 00:01:31,680 --> 00:01:35,080 Speaker 3: You and two other women were the only women in 35 00:01:35,120 --> 00:01:37,600 Speaker 3: the room. Just a room full of men, and you 36 00:01:37,600 --> 00:01:39,119 Speaker 3: were brave enough to get up on stage and talk 37 00:01:39,160 --> 00:01:42,559 Speaker 3: for about ten minutes or thereabouts. We're going to share 38 00:01:42,720 --> 00:01:46,680 Speaker 3: your talk to the Fathers of Girls conference. We're going 39 00:01:46,720 --> 00:01:48,520 Speaker 3: to share that in the podcast in the next few days. 40 00:01:48,640 --> 00:01:50,920 Speaker 3: I just wanted to highlight it because it was brilliant 41 00:01:51,040 --> 00:01:53,240 Speaker 3: and you made a room of two hundred and sixty 42 00:01:53,360 --> 00:01:55,960 Speaker 3: dads cry, I mean not every one of them, but 43 00:01:56,120 --> 00:01:59,080 Speaker 3: almost all of them, and you had their rapt attention. 44 00:01:59,280 --> 00:02:01,120 Speaker 3: It was just sort of fabulous. 45 00:02:01,440 --> 00:02:03,240 Speaker 2: Maybe because it was the change of hormone. 46 00:02:04,240 --> 00:02:08,240 Speaker 3: Well they really they were responsive. I mean it was 47 00:02:08,320 --> 00:02:11,000 Speaker 3: rowdy for over an hour while lunch was served, and 48 00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:12,960 Speaker 3: there was a fair bit of alcohol consumed as well. 49 00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:15,519 Speaker 3: But once you stood up and started to speak, they 50 00:02:15,720 --> 00:02:18,720 Speaker 3: were focused and they listened to every word, and the 51 00:02:18,760 --> 00:02:21,639 Speaker 3: feedback from it was just beautiful. You did a great job. 52 00:02:21,720 --> 00:02:24,040 Speaker 3: So we enjoyed that so much, and a big thank 53 00:02:24,120 --> 00:02:25,800 Speaker 3: you to Luke and Shawan and the team from Fathers 54 00:02:25,800 --> 00:02:29,440 Speaker 3: of Girls. It's so funny. They've got this organization and 55 00:02:29,440 --> 00:02:32,160 Speaker 3: they raised money for charities, for a charity called Confident Girls. 56 00:02:32,200 --> 00:02:34,240 Speaker 3: They've raised what was it, something like, was it one 57 00:02:34,280 --> 00:02:35,960 Speaker 3: hundred and fifty thousand or one hundred and seventy five 58 00:02:36,000 --> 00:02:38,840 Speaker 3: thousand dollars that they've raised for this charity where they 59 00:02:38,919 --> 00:02:41,280 Speaker 3: just get dads of girls to show up, pay for 60 00:02:41,320 --> 00:02:45,639 Speaker 3: their lunches, make a contribution big money. Amazing, What a 61 00:02:45,680 --> 00:02:48,600 Speaker 3: difference it makes for girls who have additional needs or 62 00:02:48,639 --> 00:02:53,000 Speaker 3: who are in circumstances where they need assistance. Just brilliant stuff. 63 00:02:53,440 --> 00:02:55,200 Speaker 3: But you gave this talk and it was brilliant. So 64 00:02:55,240 --> 00:02:56,600 Speaker 3: we're going to bring that to you on the podcast 65 00:02:56,600 --> 00:02:58,359 Speaker 3: over the next few days. We'll find a slot and 66 00:02:58,600 --> 00:03:00,920 Speaker 3: make sure that we pop that in there. Second item 67 00:03:00,960 --> 00:03:02,680 Speaker 3: of news that I just quickly wanted to bring up 68 00:03:02,840 --> 00:03:07,160 Speaker 3: was the Australia Party North Queensland, Bob and Robbie Catter 69 00:03:07,600 --> 00:03:09,040 Speaker 3: making a whole lot of noise in the media. At 70 00:03:09,040 --> 00:03:10,400 Speaker 3: the moment, parents have. 71 00:03:10,560 --> 00:03:12,560 Speaker 1: Lost their rights to discipline the children. 72 00:03:12,680 --> 00:03:14,279 Speaker 3: Dumb kids need a smack. 73 00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:14,480 Speaker 1: A kick up. 74 00:03:14,520 --> 00:03:15,359 Speaker 3: There a ruler. 75 00:03:15,800 --> 00:03:18,560 Speaker 1: That's Margie Ryder. She's running for the Queensland Parliament in 76 00:03:18,560 --> 00:03:21,120 Speaker 1: the seat of Townsville ahead of this weekend state election. 77 00:03:21,280 --> 00:03:24,679 Speaker 1: Writer is part of Kata's Australian Party KAP, a conservative 78 00:03:24,760 --> 00:03:27,679 Speaker 1: leaning party calling for a return to physical punishment as 79 00:03:27,720 --> 00:03:31,280 Speaker 1: a form of child discipline. Think Cain's belts and rulers. 80 00:03:31,800 --> 00:03:34,360 Speaker 3: Because they want to bring back the jug cord, they 81 00:03:34,360 --> 00:03:36,040 Speaker 3: want to bring back the strap, they want to bring 82 00:03:36,080 --> 00:03:39,880 Speaker 3: back the caine in schools, corporal punishment back in schools. 83 00:03:40,000 --> 00:03:42,960 Speaker 3: And now that the LMP have won the Queensland election, 84 00:03:43,520 --> 00:03:45,760 Speaker 3: this is something that they're actually trying to bring up 85 00:03:45,760 --> 00:03:47,360 Speaker 3: on the agenda. It's not going to get through, It 86 00:03:47,400 --> 00:03:50,920 Speaker 3: will never fly, and they're completely misguided. They have no 87 00:03:51,080 --> 00:03:53,240 Speaker 3: concept of what the research says around this, clearly or 88 00:03:53,240 --> 00:03:56,280 Speaker 3: they wouldn't be saying it. But I'm just it's twenty 89 00:03:56,280 --> 00:03:59,480 Speaker 3: twenty four. What world are we living in Well, we've 90 00:03:59,480 --> 00:04:02,280 Speaker 3: got politics making these kinds of ideas. I just I 91 00:04:02,280 --> 00:04:04,520 Speaker 3: had to bring it up, Kylie, because well, I don't know, 92 00:04:04,600 --> 00:04:06,280 Speaker 3: because it's a Friday and I like to bring up 93 00:04:06,280 --> 00:04:08,680 Speaker 3: these random things. So, folks, that's what's happening in Queensland. 94 00:04:08,720 --> 00:04:10,960 Speaker 3: Because in Queensland, not long do we not have daylight 95 00:04:11,000 --> 00:04:13,560 Speaker 3: saving because we're always a little bit behind. Although I 96 00:04:13,600 --> 00:04:16,360 Speaker 3: don't mind that. I do like before thirty wake cups 97 00:04:16,360 --> 00:04:19,840 Speaker 3: so much better. But yeah, we've got politicians who want 98 00:04:19,839 --> 00:04:22,799 Speaker 3: to bring that corporate punishment. Anyway, Kylie, you are battling 99 00:04:22,839 --> 00:04:24,640 Speaker 3: hay Fevers. So I'm not going to insist that you 100 00:04:24,680 --> 00:04:26,400 Speaker 3: talk a whole lot today, and we're certainly not going 101 00:04:26,440 --> 00:04:28,760 Speaker 3: to go through the fathers of girls talk today, but 102 00:04:28,880 --> 00:04:31,000 Speaker 3: it is I'll do better tomorrow. Let's kick this off 103 00:04:31,040 --> 00:04:33,040 Speaker 3: with you. This is the bit where we get introspective 104 00:04:33,040 --> 00:04:34,680 Speaker 3: of what worked, what didn't, How can we be better 105 00:04:34,760 --> 00:04:37,080 Speaker 3: parents tomorrow? What was your insight, what was your learning? 106 00:04:37,120 --> 00:04:38,960 Speaker 3: What was your positive or negative experience? I want to 107 00:04:38,960 --> 00:04:39,600 Speaker 3: hear all about it. 108 00:04:39,640 --> 00:04:41,480 Speaker 2: Well, let's start with the fact that I've been writing 109 00:04:41,520 --> 00:04:42,320 Speaker 2: now for. 110 00:04:42,120 --> 00:04:44,640 Speaker 3: Three weeks, writing with a d that is getting on 111 00:04:44,680 --> 00:04:48,080 Speaker 3: a push bike and chasing me around the Sunshine Coast streets. 112 00:04:47,800 --> 00:04:51,200 Speaker 2: And after my first week of hazardous falls and. 113 00:04:51,560 --> 00:04:53,440 Speaker 3: Oh that brilliight hi, Oh my goodness. 114 00:04:53,520 --> 00:04:56,760 Speaker 2: Yeah, we are through all of that, and I'm feeling stronger, 115 00:04:57,200 --> 00:05:01,240 Speaker 2: and I'm really really enjoying being out early in the morning. 116 00:05:01,760 --> 00:05:03,200 Speaker 3: Waking up at four thirty in the morning to go 117 00:05:03,279 --> 00:05:03,599 Speaker 3: for a bike. 118 00:05:03,600 --> 00:05:06,760 Speaker 2: Crazy, isn't it. But the big challenge is that it 119 00:05:06,839 --> 00:05:10,400 Speaker 2: has just added to my levels of exhaustion a little bit, 120 00:05:11,080 --> 00:05:12,839 Speaker 2: and nighttimes are really really hard. 121 00:05:13,120 --> 00:05:15,880 Speaker 3: So it has happened more than once that you have 122 00:05:15,960 --> 00:05:18,920 Speaker 3: fallen asleep on the couch somewhere between six thirty and 123 00:05:18,960 --> 00:05:21,760 Speaker 3: seven o'clock and the TV sid on. You're just laying 124 00:05:21,800 --> 00:05:23,719 Speaker 3: down on the couch to take a breather. Next thing 125 00:05:23,800 --> 00:05:27,760 Speaker 3: you know, you're unconscious, you're around, You're just gone. 126 00:05:28,279 --> 00:05:30,880 Speaker 2: So the other night one of the kids came to 127 00:05:31,160 --> 00:05:33,680 Speaker 2: the room. I had literally just put my feet up 128 00:05:33,760 --> 00:05:36,119 Speaker 2: and was just kind of trying to take a breather. 129 00:05:36,240 --> 00:05:37,200 Speaker 3: Do you know what time it was? 130 00:05:37,520 --> 00:05:41,039 Speaker 2: It was seven thirty SAT night. We just finished dinner, 131 00:05:41,200 --> 00:05:42,920 Speaker 2: the kids were cleaning up, and I thought I could 132 00:05:42,960 --> 00:05:45,720 Speaker 2: just quietly retreat to the room and nobody would notice 133 00:05:45,720 --> 00:05:49,640 Speaker 2: my nonsense. And there was a knock on my door 134 00:05:49,760 --> 00:05:51,720 Speaker 2: and one of the girls came in and she said, hey, Mum, 135 00:05:52,080 --> 00:05:53,960 Speaker 2: I went for a walk earlier along the beach with 136 00:05:54,000 --> 00:05:56,120 Speaker 2: a friend, but she doesn't like walking on the sand, 137 00:05:56,160 --> 00:05:58,000 Speaker 2: so we didn't actually walk very far. Do you want 138 00:05:58,040 --> 00:06:00,400 Speaker 2: to come for a walk with me now? And I 139 00:06:00,440 --> 00:06:02,680 Speaker 2: looked at her like, are you kidding me? 140 00:06:03,080 --> 00:06:06,680 Speaker 3: You looked at her through closed eyes, and. 141 00:06:06,640 --> 00:06:09,080 Speaker 2: I said, darling, I'd love to go for a walk 142 00:06:09,080 --> 00:06:11,160 Speaker 2: with you right now, But I am shouted. I got 143 00:06:11,200 --> 00:06:13,240 Speaker 2: up this morning, I went for an early bike ride. 144 00:06:13,400 --> 00:06:17,320 Speaker 2: I'm just really exhausted. I said, can we do it 145 00:06:17,360 --> 00:06:22,040 Speaker 2: another day? And she completely understood, and she was so 146 00:06:22,120 --> 00:06:24,039 Speaker 2: gracious and just said, yeah, that's fine, mum, and she 147 00:06:24,080 --> 00:06:27,599 Speaker 2: walked off. But as she walked off, my heart just 148 00:06:27,680 --> 00:06:31,200 Speaker 2: ached because I recognized in that moment what she was 149 00:06:31,240 --> 00:06:35,000 Speaker 2: actually saying was Mum, I just need you. I just 150 00:06:35,040 --> 00:06:39,680 Speaker 2: need some time. And it took everything I had to 151 00:06:39,920 --> 00:06:42,760 Speaker 2: muster up some energy to push myself off the bed 152 00:06:43,720 --> 00:06:46,280 Speaker 2: and I called down the hallway and I said, let's go, 153 00:06:46,880 --> 00:06:50,400 Speaker 2: and there was this hope field really come floating down 154 00:06:50,680 --> 00:06:53,360 Speaker 2: the corridor. As she turned and looked at me and 155 00:06:53,400 --> 00:06:56,680 Speaker 2: realized that I was actually genuinely serious. So we jumped 156 00:06:56,720 --> 00:06:58,400 Speaker 2: in the car and we drove down to our favorite 157 00:06:58,400 --> 00:07:01,520 Speaker 2: spot down at the beach five kilometers later. 158 00:07:03,200 --> 00:07:06,000 Speaker 3: It's not bad somebody who was asleep three minutes earlier. 159 00:07:06,920 --> 00:07:10,760 Speaker 2: She was completely talked out. But what I noticed was 160 00:07:10,760 --> 00:07:13,560 Speaker 2: the change in her countenance and she was just glowing. 161 00:07:14,560 --> 00:07:17,520 Speaker 2: It wasn't that we did anything special, but in that moment, 162 00:07:17,560 --> 00:07:21,120 Speaker 2: what she needed was to know that she had my 163 00:07:21,160 --> 00:07:24,120 Speaker 2: full attention. She was able to share her heart with me, 164 00:07:24,280 --> 00:07:28,440 Speaker 2: but she was also desperate to no mine, and in 165 00:07:28,480 --> 00:07:31,000 Speaker 2: that moment we were able to have that beautiful connection 166 00:07:31,040 --> 00:07:36,480 Speaker 2: that comes from no distractions and side by side, beautiful 167 00:07:36,600 --> 00:07:40,320 Speaker 2: comfortable connectedness, and it was just beautiful. 168 00:07:40,640 --> 00:07:42,680 Speaker 3: With noting as well that you don't have to live 169 00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:45,640 Speaker 3: near the beach or in some kind of exotic location 170 00:07:45,720 --> 00:07:47,240 Speaker 3: to do this. When we were living in Brisbane in 171 00:07:47,240 --> 00:07:50,000 Speaker 3: suburbia a few years ago, we would still do that, 172 00:07:50,080 --> 00:07:51,720 Speaker 3: Like the kids would want to go for a walk 173 00:07:51,760 --> 00:07:54,480 Speaker 3: and we would just walk the streets. We'd find the 174 00:07:54,760 --> 00:07:57,040 Speaker 3: nicest place in the neighborhood that we could walk to 175 00:07:57,120 --> 00:08:00,520 Speaker 3: and we'd do that take home message. 176 00:08:00,040 --> 00:08:03,600 Speaker 2: Even when it's really hard don't miss those bits for connection. 177 00:08:04,120 --> 00:08:06,440 Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah, And my take our message from that one 178 00:08:06,480 --> 00:08:10,360 Speaker 3: would actually be that parents sacrifice constantly. That's what parenting is, 179 00:08:10,640 --> 00:08:13,200 Speaker 3: and it's an uneven relationship and it's supposed to be 180 00:08:13,240 --> 00:08:15,200 Speaker 3: that way. You're never going to get back from the 181 00:08:15,320 --> 00:08:18,760 Speaker 3: children what you put in. It just won't happen. And 182 00:08:18,800 --> 00:08:22,239 Speaker 3: that's okay, that's how it's supposed to be. One day, 183 00:08:22,480 --> 00:08:24,679 Speaker 3: it actually all does come back, and it comes back 184 00:08:25,040 --> 00:08:28,400 Speaker 3: in an absolute delightful rush. And there are also those 185 00:08:28,440 --> 00:08:30,680 Speaker 3: peaks and troughs. There are those moments, well the peaks. 186 00:08:30,880 --> 00:08:32,920 Speaker 3: There are those moments like when you have the walk 187 00:08:32,920 --> 00:08:34,280 Speaker 3: and you think, I didn't have the energy for this, 188 00:08:34,280 --> 00:08:36,480 Speaker 3: but jit, it was good, and look at my daughter now, 189 00:08:42,960 --> 00:08:45,079 Speaker 3: So what's yours? Okay, I'll do better tomorrow. Is a 190 00:08:45,120 --> 00:08:48,280 Speaker 3: really simple one, and it's kind of a line. I've 191 00:08:48,320 --> 00:08:52,720 Speaker 3: been working on my book, and my goodness, Kylie, I 192 00:08:52,720 --> 00:08:54,679 Speaker 3: feel like the pressure of having to write a book 193 00:08:54,800 --> 00:08:58,120 Speaker 3: takes It's so all encompassing. I've got all these things 194 00:08:58,160 --> 00:08:59,440 Speaker 3: to do, but every time I go and do one 195 00:08:59,440 --> 00:09:01,079 Speaker 3: of those things, not writing my book, and so I'm 196 00:09:01,080 --> 00:09:02,560 Speaker 3: putting off all the things that I have to do 197 00:09:03,040 --> 00:09:05,040 Speaker 3: because the book is everything, and a book is such 198 00:09:05,040 --> 00:09:08,000 Speaker 3: a big project that you can't sort of say, I'll 199 00:09:08,040 --> 00:09:09,400 Speaker 3: just get the book done and then I'll go and 200 00:09:09,440 --> 00:09:11,839 Speaker 3: do that other stuff. But that's kind of how I'm 201 00:09:11,880 --> 00:09:14,440 Speaker 3: doing it. Because it's already sixteen months past it's due 202 00:09:14,480 --> 00:09:17,680 Speaker 3: date of the publisher. I'm so far behind time. And 203 00:09:18,000 --> 00:09:21,040 Speaker 3: the other day our fourteen year old daughter came to 204 00:09:21,080 --> 00:09:23,280 Speaker 3: me in the morning. She's being homeschool so she came 205 00:09:23,280 --> 00:09:24,920 Speaker 3: to me about ten o'clock and said, Dad, I'd really 206 00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:26,120 Speaker 3: like to go to the beach and have a swim 207 00:09:26,200 --> 00:09:27,840 Speaker 3: with you. It's a really warm day, it's a really 208 00:09:27,920 --> 00:09:30,120 Speaker 3: nice day. Have you got time to take me down 209 00:09:30,160 --> 00:09:32,120 Speaker 3: to the beach for a swim? And I looked at 210 00:09:32,120 --> 00:09:35,079 Speaker 3: her and said, I've got to write a book. Like 211 00:09:35,320 --> 00:09:36,600 Speaker 3: I don't want to say this to you, but I've 212 00:09:36,640 --> 00:09:39,360 Speaker 3: got a book to write. And she said, no, that's cool, 213 00:09:39,360 --> 00:09:40,560 Speaker 3: I get it. And I said, I tell you what, 214 00:09:41,200 --> 00:09:45,080 Speaker 3: I need to get my priorities in order, and going 215 00:09:45,080 --> 00:09:47,280 Speaker 3: for a swim with you is a high priority. But 216 00:09:47,360 --> 00:09:50,120 Speaker 3: if I go for the swim and keep on putting 217 00:09:50,120 --> 00:09:51,400 Speaker 3: off the work that has to be done on the book, 218 00:09:51,440 --> 00:09:53,080 Speaker 3: so let me do a few hours on the book 219 00:09:53,480 --> 00:09:55,880 Speaker 3: and the sarbo. Once it's not so hot and we're 220 00:09:55,880 --> 00:09:57,600 Speaker 3: out of the heat of the day, we'll head down 221 00:09:57,600 --> 00:10:00,120 Speaker 3: to the beach and I'll have a swim. And she 222 00:10:00,120 --> 00:10:03,120 Speaker 3: she just like you said with our other daughter when 223 00:10:03,160 --> 00:10:04,880 Speaker 3: she wanted to go for the walk. Lily just looked 224 00:10:04,880 --> 00:10:07,880 Speaker 3: at me and said okay, and really respected that I 225 00:10:07,960 --> 00:10:09,559 Speaker 3: had work to do, and she went and did her thing. 226 00:10:09,559 --> 00:10:12,440 Speaker 3: And I got stuck into my work and Kylie, I 227 00:10:12,520 --> 00:10:15,720 Speaker 3: completely forgot. I got absolutely absorbed in the book writing. 228 00:10:15,840 --> 00:10:18,120 Speaker 3: I did so much work. I was super productive, and 229 00:10:18,120 --> 00:10:20,280 Speaker 3: I was so proud of myself because it's so hard 230 00:10:20,480 --> 00:10:23,400 Speaker 3: to do it. Until around about I think it was 231 00:10:23,440 --> 00:10:26,360 Speaker 3: five o'clock, maybe five point fifteen, and then I suddenly remembered. 232 00:10:26,440 --> 00:10:28,640 Speaker 3: I told Lily that I'd take her for a swim, 233 00:10:29,120 --> 00:10:31,679 Speaker 3: and so I went into the house and said, you're 234 00:10:31,760 --> 00:10:33,320 Speaker 3: up for that swim and she looked at me and 235 00:10:33,400 --> 00:10:35,520 Speaker 3: like it's a bit late, dad. I said, no, come on, 236 00:10:35,559 --> 00:10:37,199 Speaker 3: we'll go for the swim. I promised you I would, 237 00:10:37,240 --> 00:10:39,760 Speaker 3: And there is still some daylight. Let's get down the beach. 238 00:10:40,120 --> 00:10:42,640 Speaker 3: So we was down the beach and again, one of 239 00:10:42,679 --> 00:10:44,600 Speaker 3: the beautiful things about where we live is that we 240 00:10:44,640 --> 00:10:47,120 Speaker 3: can do that. And Kylie was swamp for about forty 241 00:10:47,160 --> 00:10:49,800 Speaker 3: five minutes and I just I saw this kid and 242 00:10:49,800 --> 00:10:51,679 Speaker 3: a new light again. It was that beautiful moment where 243 00:10:51,720 --> 00:10:55,680 Speaker 3: you think, these kids are awesome. I love I love 244 00:10:55,800 --> 00:10:58,439 Speaker 3: being with my kids. It's just that as parents, we 245 00:10:59,280 --> 00:11:02,240 Speaker 3: feel so much pressure, we feel so much tension, we 246 00:11:02,280 --> 00:11:06,280 Speaker 3: feel so much weight, and we're so torn because everything 247 00:11:06,280 --> 00:11:10,400 Speaker 3: else is so urgent, and playing with the kids is important, 248 00:11:10,440 --> 00:11:13,480 Speaker 3: but it's not making the same level of demand on 249 00:11:13,600 --> 00:11:17,959 Speaker 3: us as the bills or the emails or the cooking 250 00:11:18,120 --> 00:11:20,240 Speaker 3: or the cleaning and all of the other things that 251 00:11:20,280 --> 00:11:23,280 Speaker 3: feel like they just have to be done. And it 252 00:11:23,280 --> 00:11:25,320 Speaker 3: felt great. So my older bettoria is a really simple one, 253 00:11:25,360 --> 00:11:27,520 Speaker 3: and that is that we've got to make time for 254 00:11:27,559 --> 00:11:28,439 Speaker 3: the things that matter most. 255 00:11:28,679 --> 00:11:31,480 Speaker 2: When I think about all of the important relationships in 256 00:11:31,520 --> 00:11:33,800 Speaker 2: our lives, whether it be our children or our parents, 257 00:11:33,800 --> 00:11:37,600 Speaker 2: our siblings, or you and not close friends partners. When 258 00:11:37,640 --> 00:11:44,720 Speaker 2: we're not intentional about making time to connect, it's so 259 00:11:44,800 --> 00:11:48,080 Speaker 2: easy to see how those little annoyances kind of just 260 00:11:48,120 --> 00:11:52,280 Speaker 2: wheedle their way into our thoughts and the way we 261 00:11:52,360 --> 00:11:56,320 Speaker 2: perceive those people in our lives. And I've had it 262 00:11:56,360 --> 00:11:58,600 Speaker 2: happen so many times where I'm just like, Oh, that 263 00:11:58,640 --> 00:12:01,640 Speaker 2: person's so annoying, blah blah, And then I spend some 264 00:12:01,800 --> 00:12:04,640 Speaker 2: quality time with them, and all of a sudden, I 265 00:12:04,679 --> 00:12:06,800 Speaker 2: remember all of the things that I love. 266 00:12:06,920 --> 00:12:08,559 Speaker 3: They're actually delightful people. 267 00:12:08,480 --> 00:12:12,199 Speaker 2: Really delightful people. But because I'm removed from the situation 268 00:12:12,440 --> 00:12:15,840 Speaker 2: so much of the time, all I see is the annoyances. 269 00:12:16,160 --> 00:12:18,400 Speaker 2: And it's the same with our kids. If we're so 270 00:12:18,640 --> 00:12:21,920 Speaker 2: busy just doing the mundane everyday things and just working 271 00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:26,880 Speaker 2: through the big list without actually being intentional about connecting, 272 00:12:27,520 --> 00:12:29,520 Speaker 2: then it's so easy for us to just see them 273 00:12:29,559 --> 00:12:34,240 Speaker 2: as annoyances because there's so many reasons to get frustrated. 274 00:12:34,360 --> 00:12:36,600 Speaker 3: Yeah, So to take our message for me probably the 275 00:12:36,600 --> 00:12:39,600 Speaker 3: same as you kids, spell love t im. Just like 276 00:12:39,640 --> 00:12:42,760 Speaker 3: dollars of the currency of our economy, attention and connection 277 00:12:43,400 --> 00:12:46,960 Speaker 3: to the currency of our relationships. The Happy Family's podcast 278 00:12:47,160 --> 00:12:50,400 Speaker 3: is produced by Justin Roland from Bridge Media. We really 279 00:12:50,440 --> 00:12:53,880 Speaker 3: hope you have a fabulous, wonderful weekend and that you 280 00:12:53,920 --> 00:12:57,240 Speaker 3: get plenty of that time so that the family feels 281 00:12:57,280 --> 00:12:59,720 Speaker 3: full of love and joy and all the good things. 282 00:12:59,800 --> 00:13:02,240 Speaker 3: So gratefully to listen to the podcast, hopefully it's doing 283 00:13:02,280 --> 00:13:04,480 Speaker 3: for you what it needs to make your family happier. 284 00:13:04,800 --> 00:13:08,880 Speaker 3: Have a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful weekend, and we'll see you 285 00:13:08,960 --> 00:13:12,760 Speaker 3: on Monday as we tackle the big issue of how 286 00:13:12,800 --> 00:13:16,240 Speaker 3: many times? How many times do I have to tell you? 287 00:13:16,760 --> 00:13:18,040 Speaker 3: On the Happy Families Podcast