WEBVTT - Shut Up Rings, Shut Up Moves & The Fine Line Between Nagging and Communication 0:00:00.160 --> 0:00:03.760 Life Uncut acknowledges the traditional custodians of country whose lands 0:00:03.800 --> 0:00:06.520 were never seated. We pay our respects to their elders 0:00:06.559 --> 0:00:07.560 past and present. 0:00:07.560 --> 0:00:11.280 Always was, always will be Aboriginal Land. This episode was 0:00:11.320 --> 0:00:12.719 recorded on Cameragle Land. 0:00:22.600 --> 0:00:25.520 Hi, guys, and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut. 0:00:25.640 --> 0:00:30.480 I'm Brittany, I'm Laura, and Laura's really really had a week. 0:00:30.840 --> 0:00:33.839 She is here. She is smiling, which is am I? 0:00:34.240 --> 0:00:34.720 Yeah? 0:00:35.159 --> 0:00:38.120 Am I here? Am I smiling? You're smiling and you're here. 0:00:38.159 --> 0:00:39.839 But I think it's like in that you know when 0:00:39.840 --> 0:00:42.839 you're smiling like that mannic way, you know when you're 0:00:42.880 --> 0:00:44.760 laughing at something and you're smiling. 0:00:45.640 --> 0:00:48.000 Alanis Morissette where it's like cry at a funeral. Also 0:00:48.080 --> 0:00:50.040 very fitting. Sorry, yeah, but. 0:00:50.000 --> 0:00:52.680 This is what I mean. You're here in your harvest group. Yeah, 0:00:52.800 --> 0:00:55.240 you're having a wonderful time. You've cracked some jokes, but 0:00:55.960 --> 0:00:59.320 it hasn't been a wonderful week. No. I love being here, guys. 0:00:59.360 --> 0:01:01.000 I'm never going to I'm on the podcast and complain 0:01:01.040 --> 0:01:03.200 about doing the podcast, because you guys, this is like 0:01:03.280 --> 0:01:04.840 the best thing that we get to do with our 0:01:04.880 --> 0:01:06.840 weeks is being here and doing this sorry. 0:01:06.640 --> 0:01:10.959 But yeah, I mean here i'd say he's the best 0:01:10.959 --> 0:01:11.920 thing I get to do each week. 0:01:11.959 --> 0:01:14.600 But sorry to my children who I love. But I mean, 0:01:14.600 --> 0:01:15.080 we'll talk. 0:01:14.920 --> 0:01:16.120 About it in a little bit, but we kind of 0:01:16.120 --> 0:01:18.039 don't want to get into it as like the intro 0:01:18.200 --> 0:01:20.760 of the crux of this episode. But if you listen 0:01:20.800 --> 0:01:23.600 to last Tuesday's episode, you would know that I was 0:01:23.640 --> 0:01:27.160 talking about my suck was that my nana was really unwell. Well, 0:01:27.200 --> 0:01:29.080 I have much worse suck this week, and that is 0:01:29.080 --> 0:01:31.319 that my nana passed away last week. 0:01:31.880 --> 0:01:32.679 Yeah, and she was. 0:01:32.720 --> 0:01:35.839 Ninety four, so like amazing, it was her time. 0:01:36.000 --> 0:01:38.640 You know, It's not as though she had a lot 0:01:38.640 --> 0:01:40.840 of life left in her and I've spoken about her 0:01:41.000 --> 0:01:43.640 so much on the pod around her dementia and kind 0:01:43.680 --> 0:01:46.360 of the last five years since my papa passed away. 0:01:46.400 --> 0:01:47.800 But it doesn't make it any less hard. 0:01:47.920 --> 0:01:50.400 It's still really sad, and I just feel I feel 0:01:50.440 --> 0:01:53.040 absolutely flattened by the week, is how I feel. 0:01:53.120 --> 0:01:54.760 Well, do you want to talk about it now or 0:01:54.800 --> 0:01:56.400 do you want me to divert for a minute and 0:01:56.400 --> 0:01:57.800 then we can come back and sit in it. 0:01:57.840 --> 0:01:58.559 What would you prefer? 0:01:58.680 --> 0:02:01.600 This is what you like to do for you? 0:02:01.600 --> 0:02:04.040 You tell me your funny stories first, and then I 0:02:04.080 --> 0:02:05.160 can talk about Shirley. 0:02:05.320 --> 0:02:07.440 Okay, I'll tell you the only thing I happened to 0:02:07.480 --> 0:02:09.760 me this week, which is I'm crying. I know, so 0:02:10.160 --> 0:02:12.720 I'm going to distract it for a minute. The only 0:02:12.800 --> 0:02:15.960 thing that really shook me this week. I'm having a 0:02:16.000 --> 0:02:19.680 real parenting crisis. I'm not an actual parent, obviously, but 0:02:19.720 --> 0:02:21.960 I have Delilah, my dog. She's the love of my life. 0:02:22.400 --> 0:02:25.840 I imagine this is what it feels like when your 0:02:25.919 --> 0:02:29.000 kid goes to preschool and they call up and they say, 0:02:29.280 --> 0:02:30.960 you know your child's been bullying people. 0:02:31.440 --> 0:02:33.480 Delilah's a terror, that's why. What has she done? 0:02:33.520 --> 0:02:33.680 Now? 0:02:34.240 --> 0:02:36.280 This is how I feel. This is what I actually 0:02:36.280 --> 0:02:38.480 felt like it. I was embarrassed, I was upset. I 0:02:38.560 --> 0:02:41.040 was really going through the emotions, and I was like, well, 0:02:40.880 --> 0:02:43.560 I get a grip, Brittany. Obviously, my period's coming or something. 0:02:43.880 --> 0:02:46.040 She goes to two dog walkers a week because when 0:02:46.080 --> 0:02:49.040 we have huge days of radio when podcasting, I'm out 0:02:49.080 --> 0:02:51.280 all day. She's an Australian shepherd. She cannot be at home, 0:02:51.720 --> 0:02:53.880 so I pay these two separate dog walkers. They come 0:02:53.880 --> 0:02:55.520 get her in the morning. She's with them all day 0:02:55.520 --> 0:02:57.639 with a group of dogs that there's always photos. They're 0:02:57.639 --> 0:02:59.399 having the time of their life, and then they drop 0:02:59.440 --> 0:03:05.959 her back. Both dog walkers independently this week basically kicked 0:03:05.960 --> 0:03:06.840 her out a dog school. 0:03:07.080 --> 0:03:08.160 No, they haven't. 0:03:08.280 --> 0:03:09.639 Yep, she's the bully. 0:03:09.720 --> 0:03:11.959 What does she do She picks some of the dogs. 0:03:11.840 --> 0:03:15.960 No, she doesn't. She's very friendly, but she's really really 0:03:16.000 --> 0:03:20.080 possessive and obsessive, right, and so producer Keisha knows the 0:03:20.080 --> 0:03:22.160 same thing because she produced. Keisha's looked after for a 0:03:22.160 --> 0:03:23.760 long time since she was a puppy. And what she 0:03:23.840 --> 0:03:27.400 thinks she's she's so obsessed with who she thinks her 0:03:27.440 --> 0:03:31.000 person is that if somebody, another dog or somebody comes 0:03:31.040 --> 0:03:33.160 too close and she gets a bit funny, she'll be 0:03:33.360 --> 0:03:37.040 very like aggressive, as in not fight it, but get 0:03:37.080 --> 0:03:39.160 in between us, growl at it like so she doesn't 0:03:39.200 --> 0:03:41.320 bite it or anything, but she's quite intimidating. 0:03:41.400 --> 0:03:43.440 Oh I've I've seen because the only reason why I 0:03:43.520 --> 0:03:46.080 make jokes is because anytimerit's come over to our house, 0:03:46.120 --> 0:03:48.880 in my house and Buster just wants to come and 0:03:49.040 --> 0:03:49.840 hang out with me. 0:03:50.440 --> 0:03:51.600 Delilah's like, oh. 0:03:51.640 --> 0:03:52.360 Fuck you up. 0:03:53.080 --> 0:03:56.120 Bus is like I live here that's my mom do. 0:03:56.560 --> 0:03:58.160 She tries to protect me from my own dog. 0:03:59.080 --> 0:04:02.080 Resource guardians a word like resource. 0:04:01.760 --> 0:04:02.520 Like, I'm not food. 0:04:02.600 --> 0:04:04.480 Usually it's about like, it's about kibble. 0:04:04.680 --> 0:04:06.680 It's not usually about the human that you don't know 0:04:06.680 --> 0:04:07.120 that well. 0:04:07.160 --> 0:04:09.920 Yeah, resource guarding is with food and balls, which she 0:04:10.040 --> 0:04:12.480 also does. So she got into a fight last week 0:04:12.480 --> 0:04:15.320 at dog school because someone else tried to take her ball. 0:04:15.440 --> 0:04:17.520 But it wasn't her ball. She took it from that dog, 0:04:17.640 --> 0:04:19.560 so the dog was trying to get her own ball back. 0:04:19.640 --> 0:04:22.640 So anyway, they both independently were like, we think Dylila 0:04:22.720 --> 0:04:24.599 might be better students. So what are you going to do? 0:04:24.680 --> 0:04:26.760 You've lost both your dog walkers. We're saying, as in 0:04:26.880 --> 0:04:29.600 Jody like or who we love. Jody can't do her anymore. 0:04:29.920 --> 0:04:32.280 Jody's put her on a one month trial. One more month. 0:04:32.600 --> 0:04:35.680 Oh she must be. Jody will take anything. Jody will 0:04:35.680 --> 0:04:36.400 take any dog. 0:04:36.839 --> 0:04:40.040 Jody loves Egi dog. My dog walkers are amazing. I 0:04:40.080 --> 0:04:42.520 don't want anyone to think that they're not. Like Demi 0:04:42.560 --> 0:04:45.040 and Jody shout out, there are incredible people. There's obviously 0:04:45.040 --> 0:04:45.919 a space in both groups. 0:04:45.920 --> 0:04:50.920 Now I get vouch for this because Jody, who she's 0:04:50.960 --> 0:04:51.800 a lifer as well. 0:04:51.839 --> 0:04:54.760 We love you. You probably are, I don't hope you are. 0:04:55.360 --> 0:04:57.760 Jody has been my sister's dog and my sister's dogs 0:04:57.760 --> 0:04:59.680 who are like fourteen years old now, like she's been 0:04:59.800 --> 0:05:01.640 my sister's dog walker for so long. 0:05:01.880 --> 0:05:05.400 She then became Buster's dog walker, and then now she's Delilahs. 0:05:05.440 --> 0:05:07.719 Dalilah is the only dog that I have ever known 0:05:07.839 --> 0:05:09.000 that Jodie's like too much. 0:05:09.040 --> 0:05:09.719 But that's years. 0:05:09.839 --> 0:05:13.279 That's real sad. So we need to do something about this. Okay, 0:05:13.360 --> 0:05:20.159 So here's where I'm at. So she's been banned from Wednesday. 0:05:19.680 --> 0:05:22.720 I'm not laughing, and everyone thinks that I'm not like 0:05:22.800 --> 0:05:25.960 I have tried to train Delilah consistently from a puppy. 0:05:26.000 --> 0:05:28.520 She's gone to dog schools, she's gone to Elite dog school, 0:05:28.560 --> 0:05:32.000 she's got puppy camp, she's been to agility school. I've 0:05:32.000 --> 0:05:33.760 trained her like she's. 0:05:34.360 --> 0:05:37.120 But we also got kicked out of agility school, remember, but. 0:05:37.080 --> 0:05:38.440 That's because she wanted to have sex with them. 0:05:40.160 --> 0:05:40.520 She like. 0:05:42.560 --> 0:05:46.440 First like a mom because she was on heat, but 0:05:46.520 --> 0:05:49.560 she she didn't focus anyway, Long story short, we've been 0:05:49.760 --> 0:05:51.960 I just want people to know it's not because I'm neglectful, 0:05:52.000 --> 0:05:53.440 like I have tried to put in the work. So 0:05:53.640 --> 0:05:56.760 this is where she's at Wednesday's band. I'm going to 0:05:56.800 --> 0:05:59.840 find her someone else, which you know, my my dog. 0:06:00.040 --> 0:06:01.560 It's like, look, it's not like I'm dropping her now. 0:06:01.640 --> 0:06:04.120 I love her. If she's just hard, I'll do it 0:06:04.160 --> 0:06:05.760 for the next month and give you time to find 0:06:05.760 --> 0:06:09.000 someone else. And I was so deeply hurt, like she 0:06:09.120 --> 0:06:11.680 was a direct reflection of me. And then on theears though, 0:06:12.080 --> 0:06:14.599 that's the problem, that's the problem. 0:06:14.640 --> 0:06:15.520 Do you know what's worse than this? 0:06:15.600 --> 0:06:18.200 The only thing worse than this is when daycare calls 0:06:18.240 --> 0:06:20.360 you to tell you that your kid has knits and 0:06:20.400 --> 0:06:22.680 your your kid is the nit kid. And that was 0:06:22.680 --> 0:06:24.520 my experience recently, and I was like, oh my god, 0:06:24.640 --> 0:06:26.120 the shame, the horror. 0:06:26.240 --> 0:06:27.600 Well, a child's the nitchild. 0:06:27.640 --> 0:06:31.480 DEMI goes and she's got fleas. 0:06:31.520 --> 0:06:32.880 Your child's the nitchild. 0:06:32.960 --> 0:06:33.520 I was joking. 0:06:33.600 --> 0:06:34.680 Well, good parenting, Brits. 0:06:34.720 --> 0:06:36.760 So she's got a one month trial for her Monday 0:06:36.839 --> 0:06:38.600 left to see if she can be better. So I 0:06:38.680 --> 0:06:40.760 feel all this pressure now one month to prove herself. 0:06:41.080 --> 0:06:44.240 So she's recommended me a dog trainer that she said 0:06:44.279 --> 0:06:46.320 is good I have never used him, so I've reached 0:06:46.360 --> 0:06:48.320 out to him and it's so funny. I've reached out 0:06:48.320 --> 0:06:49.760 to Heim on Instagram and was like, oh my god, 0:06:49.839 --> 0:06:51.920 you've been recommended. I've got an Aussie blah blah. Do 0:06:51.960 --> 0:06:53.400 you think you can help me? And he wrote back 0:06:53.440 --> 0:06:56.120 straight away and he's like, yeah, like we could do that. 0:06:56.200 --> 0:06:57.560 Tell me what you think the problems are and we'll 0:06:57.560 --> 0:06:59.040 go from there. And so I told him all the 0:06:59.040 --> 0:07:07.120 problems blanked. Raize hasn't written back, and I'm like, I'm 0:07:07.160 --> 0:07:08.760 just going to give him the benefit of the doubt 0:07:08.800 --> 0:07:11.120 for a day. He's probably on holiday with his family. 0:07:11.440 --> 0:07:14.320 But the thing about Delilah is she kind of reminds me. 0:07:14.440 --> 0:07:17.080 You know, when you're at school and someone's like so hot, 0:07:17.320 --> 0:07:19.000 You've like the hot person, but they don't have to 0:07:19.040 --> 0:07:20.040 work on their personality. 0:07:20.120 --> 0:07:22.040 Pretty privileged exists in the dog world. 0:07:22.200 --> 0:07:26.000 She know she's hot, guy, she she does. 0:07:26.280 --> 0:07:28.080 She has. Actually I have been catch you know, looking 0:07:28.080 --> 0:07:31.200 in the mirror somehow, Like sometimes I see her staring 0:07:31.240 --> 0:07:32.200 in the mirror and I'm like. 0:07:32.120 --> 0:07:33.360 Are you looking at yourself? 0:07:35.280 --> 0:07:38.000 Mom? Like daughter, hang on. What I want to say 0:07:38.040 --> 0:07:43.080 in her defense is that she's actually the most perfect 0:07:43.200 --> 0:07:47.080 dog with people with kids, with her affection, her everything. 0:07:47.480 --> 0:07:51.640 It's just this resource obsessiveness and the protectiveness is too much, 0:07:51.680 --> 0:07:53.679 and it's the problem when we're in public, at home 0:07:53.720 --> 0:07:56.120 and when it's just us. But it's the protection thing, 0:07:56.160 --> 0:07:59.680 and I don't know, like fair right she wants to 0:07:59.720 --> 0:08:00.480 keep me. No. 0:08:00.560 --> 0:08:02.200 I think we need to give Delilah a bit of 0:08:02.200 --> 0:08:04.360 slack because she comes from a broken home, like her 0:08:04.440 --> 0:08:06.000 dad left when she was a baby. 0:08:06.240 --> 0:08:07.280 Her dad walked out. 0:08:08.280 --> 0:08:09.240 Fuck you Delightah. 0:08:10.640 --> 0:08:12.680 She comes from a broken home. Her dad walked out 0:08:12.720 --> 0:08:14.920 when she was a baby. Her mom is a working mum. 0:08:15.040 --> 0:08:17.680 She knows, she's busy, she's always with the nanny. It's 0:08:17.720 --> 0:08:20.160 a really hard life living like that as a gilt 0:08:20.200 --> 0:08:21.760 an anxious attachment style. 0:08:22.640 --> 0:08:25.000 Yeah, are you saying I'm supposed to feel guilty being 0:08:25.000 --> 0:08:26.520 a working mom and putting bacon in that bowl. 0:08:26.600 --> 0:08:28.360 Absolutely, you're doing the best that you can with what 0:08:28.400 --> 0:08:28.680 you have. 0:08:29.000 --> 0:08:31.040 Damn straight the salmon. Anyway, if you're a dog walker, 0:08:31.080 --> 0:08:34.160 I mean if you're a dog walker or b a 0:08:34.200 --> 0:08:36.360 dog trainer more importantly, so sorry, back to the one 0:08:36.360 --> 0:08:40.320 month trial. What because Jodi has said, I know, trust me, 0:08:40.480 --> 0:08:42.280 stay with it. Jody has said that if she can 0:08:42.480 --> 0:08:44.320 improve in a month, she'll keep her on. So I'm 0:08:44.360 --> 0:08:46.800 on a one month time frame to whip that dog 0:08:46.840 --> 0:08:49.120 into shave probation so that she can stay with her 0:08:49.160 --> 0:08:51.520 dog walker. Pray for me, everyone, if you have dog, 0:08:51.559 --> 0:08:54.959 train to slne to my DMS. Anyway, that's my that's 0:08:54.960 --> 0:08:55.800 my life update. Thank you. 0:08:55.880 --> 0:08:58.160 I needed that. That was great, Love you, dah Well, look, 0:08:58.160 --> 0:08:59.120 we do love Dalilah. 0:08:59.520 --> 0:09:01.280 I mean she could come to the studio if she 0:09:01.280 --> 0:09:02.560 didn't drop her hair everywhere. 0:09:03.200 --> 0:09:04.920 Maybe Kim just start bringing her in and put her 0:09:04.920 --> 0:09:06.360 in the corner. She's really chill now. 0:09:06.440 --> 0:09:07.600 I think it's more the hair factor. 0:09:07.640 --> 0:09:08.360 I'll bring it vackum. 0:09:08.480 --> 0:09:12.680 Okay, I'm not against it's not my studio. So I 0:09:12.720 --> 0:09:14.960 mean speaking this is not speaking of pussy. 0:09:15.000 --> 0:09:17.560 I was gonna say, speaking of dogs, then pussies. I 0:09:17.600 --> 0:09:20.600 mean kind of like within the same realm, but slightly different. 0:09:20.880 --> 0:09:23.680 So last week we were talking about the word pussy, 0:09:24.000 --> 0:09:26.400 as in like you know, calling someone a pussy for 0:09:26.480 --> 0:09:29.000 not being brave enough, like jump off the cliff, your pussy, Yeah, 0:09:29.040 --> 0:09:31.320 just do what you pussy, And then we kind of, 0:09:31.400 --> 0:09:32.960 you know, as I said it, and as the word 0:09:32.960 --> 0:09:35.200 pussy actually you think you said it. But anyway, as 0:09:35.200 --> 0:09:37.200 the word came out of someone's mouth in here, the 0:09:37.320 --> 0:09:40.040 like PC lens of mind was like, oh God, somebody 0:09:40.080 --> 0:09:41.800 in the comment section is gonna come have it. 0:09:41.880 --> 0:09:43.520 They're gonna fucking come for us for the use of 0:09:43.520 --> 0:09:44.200 the word pussy. 0:09:44.240 --> 0:09:46.960 Now, then we ended up getting into a weird conversation 0:09:47.000 --> 0:09:50.160 about Betty White and how like pussies are actually really strong. 0:09:50.240 --> 0:09:53.600 They take a pumpy take a look. 0:09:53.600 --> 0:09:55.640 We really tried to cover all bases there, but anyway 0:09:55.679 --> 0:09:58.360 one of you guys slid in to our dms or 0:09:58.360 --> 0:10:00.800 into the space someone's sleep. 0:10:02.360 --> 0:10:03.280 We got scolled. 0:10:03.800 --> 0:10:06.280 Someone slid it into my pussy and told me that 0:10:06.320 --> 0:10:09.400 actually the word pussy, like calling someone a pussy for 0:10:09.480 --> 0:10:13.679 not being strong enough, has nothing to do with vaginas. 0:10:13.720 --> 0:10:15.920 So we can all like stop worrying about it because 0:10:15.920 --> 0:10:18.880 I know everyone's been losing sleep. So the word pussy 0:10:19.240 --> 0:10:22.680 originates from the word puss alanimus, which is showing a 0:10:22.800 --> 0:10:26.520 lack of courage or determination or is timid pus alanimous. 0:10:26.520 --> 0:10:28.600 So the next time someone is being pussy, don't call 0:10:28.679 --> 0:10:31.960 them a pussy, call them a pussy lannimus And it means. 0:10:31.760 --> 0:10:35.000 It's okay to use it without feeling guilty, like it's 0:10:35.040 --> 0:10:37.120 like a derogatory term related to the vagina. 0:10:37.280 --> 0:10:39.600 Yeah, because let's not put our vaginas or revolvers down. 0:10:39.840 --> 0:10:42.680 Let's not call people pussies. Let's call them puslanimus. When 0:10:42.720 --> 0:10:46.120 I say, when I always said pussy, though, puss alanimi, 0:10:46.280 --> 0:10:49.000 because what's the plural of it, just one flat puss alanimie. 0:10:51.400 --> 0:10:56.120 When I used the term pussy, I don't cringe. I 0:10:56.160 --> 0:10:58.920 would always say to somebody, you're a pussy, but not 0:10:58.960 --> 0:11:01.840 because I never actually associated with a vagina. I just 0:11:01.880 --> 0:11:05.880 associated it with being scared. Because when I hear the 0:11:05.880 --> 0:11:08.840 word pussy in relation to a vagina, I cringe. I 0:11:08.840 --> 0:11:12.080 don't like vaginas being called pussy. So if I was 0:11:12.200 --> 0:11:14.640 hooking up with someone who's like, show me a pussy, 0:11:14.640 --> 0:11:16.280 I'd be like, Eh, there's a front door, that's what 0:11:16.320 --> 0:11:19.360 I'll show you. I don't like the term actor as well, 0:11:20.480 --> 0:11:24.960 first date. I don't like the term pussy in relation 0:11:25.040 --> 0:11:25.520 to a vaginal. 0:11:26.840 --> 0:11:29.560 Agree, but everyone's different, Like some people find that really 0:11:29.600 --> 0:11:31.920 hot and steamy. There isn't a term. This is the 0:11:32.160 --> 0:11:35.120 unfortunate thing for me. There isn't a term for revolver 0:11:35.360 --> 0:11:37.920 or for a vagina that a guy can say in 0:11:38.000 --> 0:11:40.680 sex that makes me feel like that's sexy. 0:11:40.640 --> 0:11:44.040 So I would your word if if you're getting into 0:11:44.080 --> 0:11:47.600 it and he's trying to sexy talk and he has 0:11:47.640 --> 0:11:49.800 to use a word to refer to it, what would 0:11:49.880 --> 0:11:50.920 you want if it's not. 0:11:50.920 --> 0:11:53.240 Because if it had to happen for me, it'd be pussy. 0:11:53.400 --> 0:11:56.000 Yeah, that's the thing, because if someone's like the word 0:11:56.040 --> 0:11:57.920 that there is, but I don't enjoy it being said. 0:11:57.960 --> 0:11:59.560 I'm not like, yeah, that's it. 0:12:00.280 --> 0:12:01.080 That doesn't work. 0:12:01.160 --> 0:12:03.320 It's your volver, like, it doesn't turn me on. It 0:12:03.360 --> 0:12:06.880 doesn't it's not my volvo the car. No, it doesn't 0:12:06.880 --> 0:12:08.800 turn you on. Okay, But what is yours when it 0:12:08.800 --> 0:12:10.040 comes to a penis. 0:12:11.960 --> 0:12:16.680 If I'm probably cock? Yeah, so basic willy dick Once 0:12:16.720 --> 0:12:20.760 I said once I said willie, but like, get your 0:12:20.800 --> 0:12:25.840 willie up, show me a willie, I would say no, 0:12:25.960 --> 0:12:27.200 But I think dick's okay as well. 0:12:27.320 --> 0:12:28.360 No, I think it's cock for me. 0:12:28.480 --> 0:12:30.319 If I'm going to dirty talk, dick feels like a 0:12:30.559 --> 0:12:32.520 like a swear word, like if I'm calling someone a dick, 0:12:32.679 --> 0:12:34.319 Like it doesn't really feel like something to bring into 0:12:34.320 --> 0:12:34.679 the bedroom. 0:12:34.720 --> 0:12:36.520 But I wouldn't really call someone a cock. Okay. The 0:12:36.559 --> 0:12:38.960 relation for the true dick for me just is like 0:12:39.000 --> 0:12:41.480 a okay, regular penis. But when you say cock, it 0:12:41.520 --> 0:12:43.720 makes it sound like it's going to destroy you, Like 0:12:43.840 --> 0:12:46.400 cock just means it's going to dare you. But so 0:12:46.440 --> 0:12:48.480 it's like it's a real compliment, isn't it. I think 0:12:48.600 --> 0:12:51.080 men would want it to be referred to as a seriously, 0:12:51.200 --> 0:12:52.120 k Yeah, I. 0:12:52.120 --> 0:12:54.440 Like that you spelt it out after saying cock five times. 0:12:56.120 --> 0:12:57.880 All right, well, look off that back of that note. 0:12:57.880 --> 0:13:00.320 I'm sure my name would really appreciate us talking about her. 0:13:00.320 --> 0:13:03.040 Now. That's sorry, Shirley, mate, what a segue. 0:13:03.720 --> 0:13:05.760 I wonder what she used to use. 0:13:06.480 --> 0:13:08.640 We love she said. 0:13:08.400 --> 0:13:09.080 Cock or dick? 0:13:09.440 --> 0:13:09.880 Anyway. 0:13:10.200 --> 0:13:12.400 So look, the reason why I want to talk about 0:13:12.440 --> 0:13:15.200 this isn't because I mean it's a weird one for me, 0:13:15.280 --> 0:13:18.800 because I kind of partly feel like you almost can't 0:13:18.840 --> 0:13:21.800 be sad when someone who's ninety four years old passes 0:13:21.840 --> 0:13:24.880 away because it is so not a tragedy, especially when 0:13:25.600 --> 0:13:28.320 my NaN's had dementia for so long, and for the 0:13:28.320 --> 0:13:29.960 past five years, I think her. 0:13:29.880 --> 0:13:30.920 Life has been really hard. 0:13:31.000 --> 0:13:34.160 She's she's been living in a home she lost her 0:13:34.440 --> 0:13:36.880 husband and like the love of her life. My grandparents 0:13:36.920 --> 0:13:40.880 were together since she was sixteen and her whole life, 0:13:40.920 --> 0:13:42.960 and so for the past like five years, every time 0:13:42.960 --> 0:13:44.119 you see how she's always. 0:13:43.920 --> 0:13:47.559 Like, love you ready to die now? So she's thrilled, 0:13:47.600 --> 0:13:49.560 like this is exactly what she wanted. I love you, 0:13:49.640 --> 0:13:52.040 kill me on the way out. But it's funny. 0:13:52.040 --> 0:13:54.760 The only thing I will say that I don't know 0:13:54.800 --> 0:13:58.320 if I agree with, and I just think that we're 0:13:58.360 --> 0:14:01.560 told that when someone has lived a long life, like 0:14:01.559 --> 0:14:04.079 they're in their nineties, we're told that like, you shouldn't 0:14:04.080 --> 0:14:06.200 be sad, you should be happy they had a fulfilling life, 0:14:06.320 --> 0:14:09.880 which is so true, but you can still be sad 0:14:09.920 --> 0:14:11.720 that that person that has been a part of your 0:14:11.720 --> 0:14:14.280 whole life, even though they've lived a little life, it's 0:14:14.280 --> 0:14:17.320 still sad, like you've still lost someone. It's just it 0:14:17.360 --> 0:14:19.320 makes it a little bit more comforting to know they 0:14:19.320 --> 0:14:21.160 had the great life, but it doesn't take away the 0:14:21.200 --> 0:14:22.080 grief totally. 0:14:22.120 --> 0:14:24.840 And for me, it's a bit different because my grandparents 0:14:24.840 --> 0:14:26.760 were more than just grandparents to me, Like I lived 0:14:26.760 --> 0:14:29.320 with my grandparents growing up, so my nan was my 0:14:29.400 --> 0:14:32.960 second mum and my grandfather filled my paper. He filled 0:14:33.000 --> 0:14:35.600 such a paternal role in my life and for that, like, 0:14:35.600 --> 0:14:39.600 I'll be forever grateful for them, because they were during 0:14:39.600 --> 0:14:42.520 a time when my childhood was very chaotic. They were 0:14:42.520 --> 0:14:45.680 the one relationship that was always stable, and they always 0:14:45.680 --> 0:14:47.200 showed up for me and my sister and my brother. 0:14:47.320 --> 0:14:49.280 So they were really incredible people. 0:14:49.320 --> 0:14:51.320 But the reason why I wanted to talk about it 0:14:51.360 --> 0:14:54.400 is because we have an episode that's coming out tomorrow. 0:14:54.560 --> 0:14:57.480 It is with hospice nurse Julie, who is very prolific 0:14:57.480 --> 0:15:00.840 across TikTok, and we recorded this before we actually went 0:15:00.880 --> 0:15:03.440 on holidays, and so at the time, my Nan didn't 0:15:03.480 --> 0:15:06.560 have pneumonia and she wasn't unwell. And one of the 0:15:06.560 --> 0:15:09.720 things that hospiciness duly talked about in this episode is 0:15:09.760 --> 0:15:13.320 this moment of clarity that often people have when they 0:15:13.400 --> 0:15:15.840 are in palliative care and they are in the final 0:15:15.880 --> 0:15:20.880 stages before death. And I'm genuinely so grateful that we 0:15:21.000 --> 0:15:24.720 had done that interview and we'd had that conversation just 0:15:24.840 --> 0:15:27.400 before Nan passing away, because I think it gave me 0:15:27.440 --> 0:15:29.520 a little bit of an understanding and a bit of 0:15:29.520 --> 0:15:32.120 a preparation for what was going to happen. I didn't 0:15:32.160 --> 0:15:35.560 expect the timing to be so soon, but it really 0:15:35.720 --> 0:15:38.840 made a massive difference to me. And the reason why 0:15:38.920 --> 0:15:41.160 it did make this massive difference is because one of 0:15:41.200 --> 0:15:43.800 the things that Julie was speaking about is that when 0:15:44.200 --> 0:15:47.960 some patients, whether it be dementia patients or very elderly, 0:15:48.400 --> 0:15:50.480 have been like non responsive or have been like very 0:15:50.600 --> 0:15:53.920 unconnected for a long time, that they have these moments, 0:15:54.080 --> 0:15:57.000 often in the final stages just before death, of lucidity, 0:15:57.040 --> 0:16:00.320 where they come to and they're able to have conversation 0:16:00.520 --> 0:16:03.440 and talk. And she said that there's this experience that 0:16:03.520 --> 0:16:06.880 some people have which no one knows why, but it 0:16:07.040 --> 0:16:10.680 seems this real, like lucid connection again with reality. 0:16:10.360 --> 0:16:11.920 Like the fog lifts for a minute. 0:16:12.120 --> 0:16:16.520 Yeah, And my nan has not been very conscious at 0:16:16.560 --> 0:16:18.560 all for the last couple of weeks, even when she 0:16:18.640 --> 0:16:20.680 didn't have pneumonia. You were only getting sort of like 0:16:20.840 --> 0:16:23.800 very short replies out of her. But I went down 0:16:23.800 --> 0:16:28.720 there to Woongong two nights before she passed away, and 0:16:28.760 --> 0:16:31.160 nobody else had had a conversation with her. My sister 0:16:31.160 --> 0:16:32.760 had been down there that same day and she hadn't 0:16:32.760 --> 0:16:34.360 even woken up. And at last she was at the 0:16:34.400 --> 0:16:36.760 hospital for over an hour, and I got down there 0:16:36.760 --> 0:16:39.080 and she was completely asleep, and she was like very 0:16:39.080 --> 0:16:41.960 heavy in the chest and like real like drool of 0:16:42.000 --> 0:16:44.400 trying to breathe. And then I sat down and I 0:16:44.440 --> 0:16:46.400 was just having a conversation with her, like I was 0:16:46.440 --> 0:16:48.240 just talking to her as though she could understand what 0:16:48.280 --> 0:16:51.160 I was saying, even though she was completely not conscious. 0:16:51.560 --> 0:16:54.080 And then she started to show signs after about twenty 0:16:54.120 --> 0:16:56.960 minutes that she knew I was there. She was like 0:16:57.040 --> 0:16:59.760 moving her hand and then after a little bit longer, 0:16:59.800 --> 0:17:01.680 she was trying to raise her hand up to hold 0:17:01.680 --> 0:17:05.720 my hand, and then slowly she started showing more and 0:17:05.800 --> 0:17:09.639