WEBVTT - MINI: Tombstone Texts

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<v Speaker 1>iHeart Podcasts.

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<v Speaker 3>Got anything good?

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<v Speaker 1>Hey, this is the Christian O'Connell Show Podcast.

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<v Speaker 2>Tombstone text now. What is the text message that's at

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<v Speaker 2>the top of your phone? Send it on to me.

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<v Speaker 2>Imagine that as your tombstone text. What does your tombstone say?

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<v Speaker 2>Mine says... Star Trek Courier has delivered your courier job.

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<v Speaker 2>And we can't go into details, but I ordered, and

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<v Speaker 2>I've got it now, what I was talking about very

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<v Speaker 2>early doors yesterday about a beautiful surprise gift for my

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<v Speaker 2>wife this Sunday. I got the thing I was talking about, Pats. Oh.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, I know. There's a fail, isn't it?

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<v Speaker 2>What? What? failure by you guys to appreciate and i

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<v Speaker 2>i stepped up for the matte black version as well

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<v Speaker 2>for another 19 bucks you're worth it honey you're worth

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<v Speaker 2>it you're.

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<v Speaker 1>Worth it.

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<v Speaker 2>Shiatsu in the home that is desirable.

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<v Speaker 4>Used once and never used again.

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<v Speaker 2>Well if you hear me trying to hawk it on

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<v Speaker 2>monday show you know that mrs o'connell not a fan

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<v Speaker 2>Of that beautiful gift.

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<v Speaker 4>I can't wait to see what she says. I cannot wait.

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<v Speaker 4>That'll be the first hour of my show.

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<v Speaker 2>I FaceTimed one of my kids to say, hey, hey, hey,

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<v Speaker 2>what do we can do? Mum's got no idea. And

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<v Speaker 2>they went, oh, my God, I sort of didn't get

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<v Speaker 2>an old person.

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<v Speaker 4>Yes, it is.

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<v Speaker 2>It's like a sort of thing nannas have. She'll think

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<v Speaker 2>it's a dig about her age.

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<v Speaker 4>Producer Kaylin had a good idea. What about a waterbed?

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<v Speaker 4>Because she loves diving. She loves the ocean. Oh.

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<v Speaker 2>Waterbeds, that derisory laugh from Patsy is the right way

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<v Speaker 2>to think. Waterbed people, they have a reputation, don't they, Pats?

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<v Speaker 4>What sort of reputation? Swingers.

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<v Speaker 3>Not the O'Connells reputation, can I say.

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<v Speaker 1>We've only put to bed those rumours.

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<v Speaker 2>Last year, yes. So now we start, word gets out

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<v Speaker 2>about the waterbed. It's just like the marriage is in trouble.

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<v Speaker 2>Have you heard about the O'Connells? He's disordered his wife

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<v Speaker 2>in Waterbury. Trying to spice things up in the bedroom.

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<v Speaker 4>Can you often still get them?

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, I bet you can, especially in this country.

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<v Speaker 1>Not much class. Patsy, what's a tombstone text for you?

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<v Speaker 3>This was actually to my husband last night. New low

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<v Speaker 3>for me.

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<v Speaker 4>Sent myself a package.

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<v Speaker 1>How do you even do that?

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<v Speaker 5>Oh, God knows.

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<v Speaker 3>I had to send something back last week. I had

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<v Speaker 3>a fascinating, didn't match my outfit. So I went to

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<v Speaker 3>the post office, had to send it back, only instead

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<v Speaker 3>of putting to and to the return of the business,

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<v Speaker 3>I put me and my address. But I didn't realise

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<v Speaker 3>until yesterday when the postie came to the door, I

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<v Speaker 3>opened up, that looks vaguely familiar. And he handed it

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<v Speaker 3>to me and I said, oh, my God, that's my fascinator.

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<v Speaker 4>I've sent it to myself.

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<v Speaker 1>This is incredible. Return to sender. What an idiot. No, Pat,

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<v Speaker 1>this is what happens when you get up early hours

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<v Speaker 1>at you do, like three in the morning.

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<v Speaker 4>Oh, it was so silly.

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<v Speaker 1>I thought, oh, my Lord.

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<v Speaker 3>You wouldn't believe it.

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<v Speaker 1>I wonder if that's ever happened before.

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<v Speaker 2>Has anybody else listening ever accidentally sent themselves something?

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<v Speaker 4>A gift to yourself.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes.

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<v Speaker 4>That was ridiculous.

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<v Speaker 1>Maybe some people do that on Valentine's Day.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, that's sad.

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<v Speaker 1>You know, throw in a flat shirt to look popular.

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<v Speaker 4>Oh, that was so specific.

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<v Speaker 3>It seems like someone's done it before.

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<v Speaker 2>My wife always goes, wow, you have so many mysterious advisors.

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<v Speaker 1>All with that strange handwriting that you.

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<v Speaker 4>Have, Chris. In Sharpies.

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<v Speaker 1>Ladies with hard handwriting. Riel, what's your tombstone text?

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<v Speaker 4>Mine's actually so cute. Mine's, he bought his stethoscope.

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<v Speaker 5>My parents, who are grandparents, went to my little nephew's

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<v Speaker 5>preschool to do Grandparents Day. And so I've got all

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<v Speaker 5>these photos Dad brought. He wants to sort of make

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<v Speaker 5>doctors less scary for little kids.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh, that's a lovely idea.

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<v Speaker 4>It's so cute.

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<v Speaker 5>He brought his stethoscope and all these little doctor toys.

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<v Speaker 5>And I've just got all these photos in the WhatsApp

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<v Speaker 5>chat of Dad like, Playing with the stethoscope.

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<v Speaker 1>He would have been the big draw there with that.

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<v Speaker 1>He's a prop guy.

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<v Speaker 4>He is.

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<v Speaker 1>He's character.

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<v Speaker 4>He does great prop comedy.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, my God. Once he opens up that steamer trunk,

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<v Speaker 2>the props keep coming. He's got the tongue depressor, that

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<v Speaker 2>wooden thing.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh, they love that. The thing they tap the knee with.

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<v Speaker 4>Yes, he brought that, the reflex one. They were having

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<v Speaker 4>a ball. It was so cute.

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<v Speaker 2>Christian, my tombstone would read, I cannot wait for the

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<v Speaker 2>impending gossip sesh. It sounds like on the other side

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<v Speaker 2>in heaven, you get the most amazing gossip.

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<v Speaker 4>Yes.

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<v Speaker 1>Because they're all up there and they tell you the truth.

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<v Speaker 4>You wouldn't believe.

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<v Speaker 1>The Christian O'Connell Show. Go on. Podcast.