WEBVTT - Quake shake voms & park fights 0:00:00.400 --> 0:00:02.840 It's nice to have your voice back. I know you 0:00:02.920 --> 0:00:05.520 missed the hask, but I don't know if I could 0:00:05.559 --> 0:00:06.920 do another episode with an erection. 0:00:22.560 --> 0:00:25.279 Welcome back to two notting dads. I am Maddie Jay 0:00:25.400 --> 0:00:28.520 and I'm Ash. This is a conversation all about parenting, 0:00:28.560 --> 0:00:31.040 the good, the bad, and the relatable. And we have 0:00:31.080 --> 0:00:33.120 to also say at this point, if you're coming for 0:00:33.159 --> 0:00:34.600 any type of advice. 0:00:34.800 --> 0:00:37.160 Steer clear, turn away child right now. 0:00:37.520 --> 0:00:40.519 Ash wait, I have a very important announcement to make. 0:00:40.600 --> 0:00:41.640 Pla head on me, big man. 0:00:42.040 --> 0:00:44.680 Well, let's just say that this podcast is about to 0:00:44.720 --> 0:00:47.080 get a whole lot better. 0:00:47.640 --> 0:00:50.239 No shit, if you know what I'm saying, exactly what 0:00:50.240 --> 0:00:51.080 you're saying, Well, you. 0:00:51.080 --> 0:00:54.160 Know, the listeners don't know. But we have a very 0:00:54.280 --> 0:00:57.240 first broken our sponsored virginity. 0:00:56.800 --> 0:00:58.880 Here so we can keep making podcasts. 0:00:58.960 --> 0:01:01.680 Or Yeah. This means is that this podcast, it's got 0:01:01.760 --> 0:01:05.440 legs better beer, has injected some life into two doting dads. 0:01:05.480 --> 0:01:07.480 They are our very first sponsor. 0:01:07.760 --> 0:01:10.760 That's amazing. So essentially I have an excuse now to 0:01:10.800 --> 0:01:14.200 start drinking at ten am, and my wife can't say 0:01:14.200 --> 0:01:16.360 a single thing about it. 0:01:16.640 --> 0:01:21.440 I'm sure April is absolutely thrilled. She's like, so, who's 0:01:21.440 --> 0:01:23.600 the sponsor? Is it like a fruit and veg company? 0:01:23.640 --> 0:01:25.520 Isn't it you do with babies? What am I getting 0:01:25.520 --> 0:01:26.560 out of it? 0:01:26.560 --> 0:01:27.360 It's beer. 0:01:27.520 --> 0:01:29.080 It's beer's baby, it's beers. 0:01:29.200 --> 0:01:31.320 But the story of Better Beer it's it's pretty sick. 0:01:31.400 --> 0:01:33.160 If you're familiar Ash, you may have heard of the 0:01:33.160 --> 0:01:37.080 two boys co founded it inspired unemployed. Does that ring 0:01:37.080 --> 0:01:40.119 a bell? Absolutely, they're good mate. He's a publican, Nick Koger. 0:01:40.400 --> 0:01:43.440 They wanted to create a delicious, healthier beer, which is 0:01:43.480 --> 0:01:45.360 how Better Beer Company started. 0:01:45.440 --> 0:01:47.840 Didn't they like to sell out immediately on the first 0:01:47.880 --> 0:01:48.400 week it. 0:01:48.400 --> 0:01:50.640 Did stupidly well. I think it's about a year and 0:01:50.680 --> 0:01:55.000 a half ago they launched. Since then, they've sold ten million, 0:01:55.600 --> 0:01:58.000 ten million leaders of beer leaters. 0:01:58.640 --> 0:02:04.080 That's just to me, not bad. A couple of X trade's. 0:02:04.440 --> 0:02:06.400 They now have five beers in the range and I'm 0:02:06.480 --> 0:02:10.360 personally frothing on the new Pacific al Al that's definitely 0:02:10.360 --> 0:02:10.800 my drop. 0:02:10.960 --> 0:02:13.880 I mean, should we absolutely, it'd be rude not to. 0:02:13.880 --> 0:02:18.320 Ten am, let's go, that's the stuff. 0:02:18.400 --> 0:02:21.440 Cheers, cheers. Sorry, sorry, sorry. 0:02:21.160 --> 0:02:25.280 I'm just trying to just straight in. Let's go. I 0:02:25.560 --> 0:02:26.920 haven't even had breakfast yet. 0:02:26.760 --> 0:02:30.200 So that is tasty, that is that is crisp, that 0:02:30.360 --> 0:02:30.920 is very good. 0:02:30.960 --> 0:02:32.919 Look, I'm a big fan of Pacific Al, so I'm 0:02:33.000 --> 0:02:35.480 very happy they brought this out. I have drank their 0:02:35.480 --> 0:02:39.519 other ones as well, enjoy them also, But Sunday Harvo 0:02:39.600 --> 0:02:45.880 for me, Pacific Al the dream one too many of course, absolutely. 0:02:45.520 --> 0:02:46.639 Big shout out to better Beer. 0:02:46.720 --> 0:02:48.239 We love you boys, Thank you guys. 0:02:48.680 --> 0:02:50.600 To me, it feels like a lot longer than a 0:02:50.639 --> 0:02:52.840 week since we last record. It feels like it's been 0:02:52.880 --> 0:02:53.560 an eternity. 0:02:53.840 --> 0:02:56.799 It's been a long time. It's been a weekend. What 0:02:57.160 --> 0:03:00.760 is it? Miss you too, It's been too long? What's new? 0:03:01.000 --> 0:03:03.360 What's new for you? I mean for me? Not a 0:03:03.360 --> 0:03:06.160 whole lot. I've noticed something devious my wife does with 0:03:06.240 --> 0:03:08.080 our children's lunchboxes. 0:03:08.480 --> 0:03:11.280 Devious in what way is she like hiding drugs in there? 0:03:11.320 --> 0:03:14.840 What is she Let's say yes, let's say yes, so okay, 0:03:15.160 --> 0:03:19.400 obviously I have two kids. One they go to different kindergartens. 0:03:19.480 --> 0:03:21.959 Is because one of them is free for this year 0:03:22.080 --> 0:03:24.320 for the first two days, and it's also got older kids. 0:03:24.360 --> 0:03:27.000 So Oscar goes to this other daycare, which we need 0:03:27.040 --> 0:03:28.280 to provide the lunch with him. 0:03:28.360 --> 0:03:30.240 I know a few people who go to those daycares. 0:03:30.240 --> 0:03:32.960 We have to bring the lunch. That to me sounds 0:03:33.000 --> 0:03:34.080 like a bloody nightmare. 0:03:34.520 --> 0:03:38.120 Well it's not mine, Aunt Merrit's aprils. And of course 0:03:38.200 --> 0:03:40.720 we've got the Bento box lunch boxes, which is so 0:03:40.960 --> 0:03:43.880 in fashion at the moment. What's the Bento You know 0:03:43.960 --> 0:03:47.360 exactly what I'm talking about. So essentially it's a customized 0:03:47.840 --> 0:03:50.040 it's got their name on the front of it. You 0:03:50.120 --> 0:03:53.400 open it up and it's got set like compartments like 0:03:53.440 --> 0:03:55.400 a Bento box. Yes, yeah, you know the one I'm 0:03:55.400 --> 0:03:55.800 talking about. 0:03:55.800 --> 0:03:56.560 But we don't have that. 0:03:56.600 --> 0:03:58.640 We literally you're living in the past. Man. 0:03:58.800 --> 0:04:01.160 What we use as a lunch box and the kids 0:04:01.200 --> 0:04:02.040 love it. 0:04:01.760 --> 0:04:04.360 Is just a ziploc bag like lish that. 0:04:04.680 --> 0:04:07.960 Or like a plastic takeaway container put in the tie 0:04:08.000 --> 0:04:10.120 container from takeaway in the dishwasher. 0:04:10.240 --> 0:04:11.120 Your poor children. 0:04:11.160 --> 0:04:13.240 We walked a daycare this morning, didn't have time to 0:04:13.240 --> 0:04:16.279 eat breakfast. So I'm like, we're taking a lunch box. 0:04:16.480 --> 0:04:19.279 Reaches and she grabs a takeaway container. That's our Bento box. 0:04:19.320 --> 0:04:22.160 Oh my god, what do you get the Bento box from? Much? 0:04:22.160 --> 0:04:24.279 They're everywhere. I don't know. You've got to have the 0:04:24.360 --> 0:04:27.160 latest things, apparently, according to my wife. 0:04:26.960 --> 0:04:29.640 To keep up with the Joneses, keep exactly. 0:04:29.279 --> 0:04:33.000 Right, and look, they're great. They're annoying to wash, dishwasher 0:04:33.080 --> 0:04:36.560 or hand you can do either, okay. Anyway, so they're separate. 0:04:36.560 --> 0:04:40.560 They've got the compartment, so you've got dairy protein, bloody, bloody, 0:04:40.680 --> 0:04:44.120 fucking blah blah. Anyway, so I just put whatever in 0:04:44.200 --> 0:04:46.120 whatever compartment. It's not a big deal to me. But 0:04:46.360 --> 0:04:50.000 he's like, that's not protein. You can't put it in there. 0:04:50.800 --> 0:04:51.720 What are you putting in there? 0:04:51.720 --> 0:04:54.800 You got like I'm imagining this sandwich yoga maybe like 0:04:54.839 --> 0:04:57.560 a yogurt pouch or fit in there? Fruit? 0:04:57.800 --> 0:04:58.640 What kind of sandwich? 0:04:58.920 --> 0:05:01.919 Like a veggimo, Benjamin, You can't do peanut butter obviously 0:05:02.000 --> 0:05:06.960 because nuts. Some kiddies have nut allergies. It's mainly bacon 0:05:07.000 --> 0:05:10.880 and cheese rolls. The kids loving them. Heaven, they are 0:05:10.920 --> 0:05:14.159 good good. But anyway, I noticed the other day, so 0:05:14.200 --> 0:05:17.440 my mum was here and she brought over mince lice biscuits. Yeah, 0:05:17.440 --> 0:05:19.479 the beautiful chocolate mince slice biscuit. 0:05:19.560 --> 0:05:21.800 Disagree, it's fucking toothpaste and chocolate put together. 0:05:21.800 --> 0:05:24.440 But continue continue, I'll agree to disagree on that one. 0:05:24.480 --> 0:05:28.920 I'll let that one slide. So we're not that obviously 0:05:29.120 --> 0:05:31.920 send chocolate to kids fircle, So. 0:05:31.920 --> 0:05:34.040 I why not? Is it because they all flip out 0:05:34.240 --> 0:05:34.880 with one person? 0:05:35.720 --> 0:05:38.440 Yeah? Yeah, yeah, I think it's also like the nutritional 0:05:38.520 --> 0:05:42.320 value on a mint, yeah, and whatever sort of chocolate. 0:05:42.600 --> 0:05:45.760 So I've noticed that my wife does something very devious. 0:05:45.960 --> 0:05:53.599 She hides the biscuit under the raspbreed. But that's not 0:05:53.680 --> 0:05:56.520 the worst part of it. First of all, you don't 0:05:56.600 --> 0:05:59.840 need to give them chocolate for lunch. You don't need 0:05:59.880 --> 0:06:05.200 to do that. But then she's also telling Oscar, make 0:06:05.240 --> 0:06:12.480 sure you eat it before the teachers come around. And 0:06:12.520 --> 0:06:14.320 I'm like, are you fucking serious. 0:06:14.400 --> 0:06:16.000 She's smuggling in chocolate. 0:06:16.000 --> 0:06:20.159 She's smuggling chocolate into the kindergarten. And then when we 0:06:20.240 --> 0:06:23.120 pick up Oscar, he's like, they didn't see me eat it. 0:06:23.760 --> 0:06:27.640 This is like they're in Kohootz, these two. They're literally 0:06:27.800 --> 0:06:33.040 swindling the teachers and smuggling in contraband to the kindergarten. 0:06:33.320 --> 0:06:35.680 Surely they're going to see him. All the kids are eating. 0:06:35.920 --> 0:06:38.719 Yeah, and there's so many more kids, and April has 0:06:39.320 --> 0:06:42.120 like literally given him a play by playbook April used 0:06:42.120 --> 0:06:44.760 to work at this kindergarten too, so she understands. She 0:06:44.839 --> 0:06:47.360 knows the blind spots where the blind spots are, and 0:06:47.400 --> 0:06:50.960 she's really teaching him bad habit. I thought I was 0:06:51.000 --> 0:06:53.880 the bad one with diet, and I mean, that's something 0:06:53.920 --> 0:06:55.480 I want to talk to you about today as well. 0:06:55.520 --> 0:06:57.839 But I was shocked. 0:06:58.040 --> 0:07:01.000 That's I can't believe April. She's such a princess. She's 0:07:01.000 --> 0:07:01.480 an angel. 0:07:01.760 --> 0:07:03.880 I know. She's such a goody goody too, never does 0:07:03.920 --> 0:07:06.599 anything wrong. It makes me think, though, if I go 0:07:06.720 --> 0:07:08.440 to prison, I'm in good hands. 0:07:08.640 --> 0:07:09.360 Oh you're fine. 0:07:09.600 --> 0:07:11.920 She's going to be like, I've just baked your cake. 0:07:12.200 --> 0:07:17.200 Actually she can't cook. I've just had someone bake you 0:07:17.200 --> 0:07:20.120 a cake and there's a pack of SIGI's in there 0:07:20.160 --> 0:07:21.360 for you to buysh it with. 0:07:23.480 --> 0:07:26.360 Do you think at any point like daycare are going 0:07:26.440 --> 0:07:28.520 to find out? Because how long has this been going 0:07:28.560 --> 0:07:29.040 on for now? 0:07:29.120 --> 0:07:32.080 Like I'm guessing since he's been there so this year. 0:07:32.480 --> 0:07:34.680 But I think what happens is if they do find 0:07:34.680 --> 0:07:38.120 it so confinement, they've probably the teachers are all at 0:07:38.160 --> 0:07:41.480 the back end. What did you get today? 0:07:42.560 --> 0:07:43.400 Get the mint slices? 0:07:43.440 --> 0:07:45.480 I think to him at the end of the day. 0:07:46.360 --> 0:07:47.560 I think that's how it works. 0:07:47.800 --> 0:07:51.640 But don't you worry though that Oscar bless his cotton socks. 0:07:51.680 --> 0:07:53.000 He's been doing it for a while now. 0:07:53.400 --> 0:07:53.600 You know. 0:07:53.600 --> 0:07:56.080 At some point, after a few months start to progress, 0:07:56.280 --> 0:07:58.920 you become a little bit complacent maybe and. 0:07:58.920 --> 0:08:01.840 It gets greedy. Do you think maybe he gets greedy? Yeah, 0:08:01.880 --> 0:08:02.320 you get great. 0:08:02.680 --> 0:08:05.040 Well, now he's like, hey, don't just put in one. 0:08:05.120 --> 0:08:07.880 Put it into check one under the sandbo as well. 0:08:08.000 --> 0:08:08.520 Yeah. 0:08:08.600 --> 0:08:13.160 I think maybe the criminal mind works. Like I stole 0:08:13.240 --> 0:08:16.680 ten grand from the bank, warn't next time getting twenty grand. Yeah, 0:08:16.760 --> 0:08:18.120 I'm down for a little bit more. And they get 0:08:18.120 --> 0:08:22.280 greedier and greedier and greedier. Next minute, Oscar is dealing 0:08:22.680 --> 0:08:25.880 mint slices at kindergarten. That's the sort of tone you're 0:08:25.880 --> 0:08:28.680 setting for my child. Open if you're listening. That's how 0:08:28.760 --> 0:08:30.520 I really feel. I didn't have the balls to say 0:08:30.560 --> 0:08:31.960 it to your face, but I'm going to say it 0:08:32.000 --> 0:08:34.240 to Matthew and the rest of the world, and if 0:08:34.240 --> 0:08:36.760 you hear it, that's how I really feel about it. 0:08:36.800 --> 0:08:39.000 I got to your house next week and Oscar wearing 0:08:39.000 --> 0:08:41.280 a brand new roll leggs. He's in Gucci he's got 0:08:41.280 --> 0:08:43.680 one of those tear drop. I'm like, Jesus, what happened 0:08:43.720 --> 0:08:44.200 to you, Oscar? 0:08:44.440 --> 0:08:47.760 It's like, hardened up, get with the program. 0:08:48.360 --> 0:08:51.640 This didn't happen to me last week. This happened to 0:08:51.640 --> 0:08:53.400 me a little while ago. And I thought I told 0:08:53.440 --> 0:08:56.520 you the story about how I got into a fight. 0:08:56.360 --> 0:08:58.559 At the park. Yeah, you're known for that. 0:08:58.720 --> 0:09:01.200 I mean I told you the story I swear I have. 0:09:02.000 --> 0:09:03.719 Is it with another parent or how did it work? 0:09:03.800 --> 0:09:07.240 Yeah? It was multiple parents. Hang on a minute, multiple parents. 0:09:07.600 --> 0:09:10.920 You're in your fight club down at the local park. Yeah, 0:09:11.040 --> 0:09:14.559 other parents, women or men, both far off? 0:09:14.720 --> 0:09:15.319 It was all in. 0:09:15.760 --> 0:09:18.720 Were their punches thrown? No? Okay no, no. 0:09:18.880 --> 0:09:19.920 Luckily we didn't. 0:09:19.679 --> 0:09:21.160 Get it was a misunderstanding. 0:09:21.200 --> 0:09:23.400 It got to the point where, in hindsight, I look 0:09:23.480 --> 0:09:25.800 back and I'm like, that really could have I could 0:09:25.840 --> 0:09:28.600 have escalated and been quite a serious little situation. Luckily 0:09:28.679 --> 0:09:31.839 I didn't go that far. But I'm quite cool, calm 0:09:31.880 --> 0:09:33.960 and collected. I'm not a violent but I can imagine. 0:09:33.960 --> 0:09:36.960 Look, I've been waiting to fear a fire up. I 0:09:36.960 --> 0:09:40.679 can feel it sometimes. I'm like, imagine if you just 0:09:40.720 --> 0:09:43.800 snapped and murdered everybody, and feel it. 0:09:43.800 --> 0:09:47.600 It almost happened. So on Thursdays, the kids aren't in daycare, 0:09:47.760 --> 0:09:50.400 it's what we call a daddy day. It's where me 0:09:50.480 --> 0:09:53.280 and the girls, Marley and Lola, we just hang out 0:09:54.160 --> 0:09:56.560 normally go down to the park down the road and 0:09:56.640 --> 0:09:59.440 bring Buster along. And it's very wholesome. 0:09:59.480 --> 0:10:01.280 Buster the three leg a dog. 0:10:01.480 --> 0:10:06.800 That's it, you know, it's me bust pop along literally, 0:10:07.440 --> 0:10:10.200 and the girls love to bring the bike down, bring 0:10:10.240 --> 0:10:13.520 the scooter and it's a beautiful afternoon. And I kind 0:10:13.520 --> 0:10:15.800 of enjoy it because the girls love it. You know, 0:10:15.920 --> 0:10:18.600 I feel like I'm being a good dad. And nothing 0:10:18.640 --> 0:10:20.520 makes me happier than when I look at the smiles 0:10:20.520 --> 0:10:23.439 of my children, and I'm like, I'm doing it good. 0:10:26.160 --> 0:10:28.120 So we're at the park, cut a few laps on 0:10:28.160 --> 0:10:30.760 the bike path and the scooter, and then Lola says 0:10:30.800 --> 0:10:33.559 to me, I need to go do wie wei? Sure, 0:10:34.120 --> 0:10:36.840 pick her up, walk over to the toilets. Buster hops 0:10:36.840 --> 0:10:40.040 along as well, and he's off lead. The park is 0:10:40.080 --> 0:10:42.120 an off lead park. But also he's got three legs. 0:10:42.120 --> 0:10:44.640 So it's trying to juggle two kids and a dog 0:10:44.800 --> 0:10:47.679 with three legs. It's hard work. Ash. Also, I'm dragging 0:10:47.720 --> 0:10:48.600 a freaking scooter. 0:10:48.880 --> 0:10:49.280 Yeah. 0:10:49.320 --> 0:10:51.720 At the same time, we make our way back to 0:10:51.720 --> 0:10:54.200 the park and I look over and there's another family 0:10:54.640 --> 0:10:57.079 and they have a blue Healer, which, you know, normally 0:10:57.120 --> 0:11:00.000 a very friendly dog. I personally haven't had any issue. 0:11:00.520 --> 0:11:04.760 Yeah, they shed a lot of hair, but it's nothing. Personally. Yeah, No, 0:11:04.760 --> 0:11:07.880 they can't help that, but the attitude on them is 0:11:07.960 --> 0:11:09.000 usually pretty good. 0:11:09.120 --> 0:11:11.960 Pretty good. Right. I look over and this lady is 0:11:11.960 --> 0:11:15.080 holding the blue heeler. He's on a lead, and Buster 0:11:16.320 --> 0:11:20.880 quietly and slowly hobbles over. You know, if anyone doesn't 0:11:20.880 --> 0:11:23.520 know my dog, he's not fast. He's got two back legs, 0:11:23.520 --> 0:11:24.600 he's got one front leg. 0:11:24.880 --> 0:11:26.599 The front legs jacked though. 0:11:26.480 --> 0:11:36.600 It's shredded, and Buster literally just hops over and like 0:11:37.040 --> 0:11:39.520 gives him a little sniff, not angry at all. 0:11:39.559 --> 0:11:44.360 Buster is such a placid dog. The blue heeler loses 0:11:44.440 --> 0:11:47.480 it ra ra right right, raight right rah, and all 0:11:47.480 --> 0:11:50.599 of a sudden he runs around the owner. She was 0:11:50.640 --> 0:11:53.880 a little bit older, and all of a sudden her 0:11:53.960 --> 0:11:56.840 legs are like closed shut because the lead is just 0:11:56.880 --> 0:11:59.600 wrapped around her, so then she can't move. 0:12:00.200 --> 0:12:02.599 Who's lead the blue heels Sorry, the older. 0:12:02.400 --> 0:12:05.600 Lady who's holding the blue the leaders wrapped around her, 0:12:05.679 --> 0:12:09.000 legs set of close shut, and she topples over. She 0:12:09.160 --> 0:12:13.280 like hits the deck, you know, like that. And my 0:12:13.320 --> 0:12:15.679 initial reaction was like, oh, my goodness, I hope this 0:12:15.760 --> 0:12:18.480 lady is okay, because you know, like it was like 0:12:18.520 --> 0:12:20.640 a scene from a cartoon or something where like legs 0:12:20.640 --> 0:12:22.839 close shut, she didn't have time to put her arm out, 0:12:22.880 --> 0:12:27.160 so she just like it wasn't a hard that was 0:12:27.280 --> 0:12:28.840 like she was falling from a distance. 0:12:28.880 --> 0:12:30.520 But it was her dog that did that, right. 0:12:30.400 --> 0:12:32.560 Her dog, her dog, and Buster even Buster was like, 0:12:32.600 --> 0:12:35.760 holy shit, this is that's kind of crazy. Buster backed off, 0:12:36.240 --> 0:12:38.200 and then as I was making my way over to 0:12:38.240 --> 0:12:41.960 be like are you okay, she starts losing it at me, 0:12:42.400 --> 0:12:45.040 just like the blue Hill was losing it earlier reflection, 0:12:45.400 --> 0:12:49.040 and she's like, your dog fucking attacked me. How dare you? 0:12:49.679 --> 0:12:53.400 I was like, what excuse me? And she's like, it's 0:12:53.480 --> 0:12:56.080 your dog. He shouldn't be on a lead. As she's 0:12:56.200 --> 0:12:58.800 like laying there still like on the ground like mamma 0:12:58.840 --> 0:13:00.520 fired by this lead about like. 0:13:00.480 --> 0:13:03.600 The zero like dominance of that situation where she's yelling 0:13:03.640 --> 0:13:06.360 at you but she's flat on the back. You just 0:13:06.360 --> 0:13:07.000 stand over. 0:13:06.920 --> 0:13:09.200 And be like yeah, yeah. I was like, what are 0:13:09.240 --> 0:13:11.640 you talking about? I was like, my dog was chilled. 0:13:11.800 --> 0:13:14.280 It's your dog that lost it. And I think it 0:13:14.360 --> 0:13:17.400 was either like her friend or like maybe a son 0:13:17.440 --> 0:13:20.120 I don't have. This bloke who was with her was like, 0:13:20.360 --> 0:13:22.480 bloody hell mate, you need to keep your dog on 0:13:22.520 --> 0:13:25.800 a leave. That's irresponsible. And I was like, what are 0:13:25.840 --> 0:13:28.880 you talking about, bro? And then he goes, you just 0:13:28.920 --> 0:13:29.960 stop being a dick? 0:13:30.320 --> 0:13:30.800 Oh what? 0:13:31.000 --> 0:13:33.280 And I kind of forgot In that moment. I was 0:13:33.320 --> 0:13:36.400 holding Lola and Marley was standing next to me, and 0:13:36.400 --> 0:13:37.280 I kind of just forgot. 0:13:37.360 --> 0:13:39.480 I was like, yeah, you just see red Hay. 0:13:39.600 --> 0:13:41.679 I was like, what do you mean, dude, what are 0:13:41.720 --> 0:13:45.240 you talking about? And then these two ladies still on 0:13:45.280 --> 0:13:48.760 the floor yelling at me, her guy mates also having 0:13:48.800 --> 0:13:51.240 a go at me, and I'm just like, is this 0:13:51.320 --> 0:13:53.240 a prank? I did? 0:13:53.360 --> 0:13:54.520 Laurie just popped out like. 0:13:57.360 --> 0:14:00.720 I literally thought like this can't be real. And then 0:14:00.880 --> 0:14:04.520 this mum, another mum in the park comes over. 0:14:05.120 --> 0:14:06.440 To back you up or back them up? 0:14:06.440 --> 0:14:08.760 Well, I thought, I'm like, great, I've got someone here 0:14:08.760 --> 0:14:11.400 to be like you guys are being ridiculous. But then 0:14:11.480 --> 0:14:14.280 she looks at me, and she's like, not in front of. 0:14:14.240 --> 0:14:21.320 The children, and I'm like what, and she's like, please, 0:14:21.680 --> 0:14:24.800 someone think of the children, not in front of them. 0:14:24.920 --> 0:14:27.000 All the language coming out of this exchange. 0:14:27.120 --> 0:14:29.280 And then all of a sudden, because now we're making 0:14:29.320 --> 0:14:32.600 a big commotion, people in the park are now stopping. 0:14:32.200 --> 0:14:36.240 And looking at me, and I'm like, I didn't do anything. 0:14:36.920 --> 0:14:39.760 I'm an innocent victim. 0:14:38.720 --> 0:14:40.880 Playing the dog. Are you going to play anybody? 0:14:41.880 --> 0:14:43.920 And so she keeps pointing at me, just being like 0:14:44.240 --> 0:14:48.360 the children like not not here. Please. This lady starts 0:14:48.400 --> 0:14:49.080 freaking out. 0:14:49.400 --> 0:14:50.320 She's still on the ground. 0:14:51.920 --> 0:14:54.520 I think she's back up, but there's other mums come over. 0:14:55.080 --> 0:14:58.760 It's like we've just pulled out weapons. That's how she's behaving. 0:14:58.440 --> 0:15:03.000 Like an ankerman two the park. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, acting. 0:15:02.760 --> 0:15:04.600 As if I've just whipped out a crowbar and he's 0:15:04.600 --> 0:15:07.600 got nunchucks and we're about to do this gladiator fight. 0:15:08.280 --> 0:15:10.520 Not the case. And then I'm like, okay, do you 0:15:10.560 --> 0:15:13.000 know what I'm just going I'm going to walk away 0:15:13.040 --> 0:15:15.480 here because this is not going to be resolved, and 0:15:15.520 --> 0:15:17.720 people are starting to get a little bit heated, and 0:15:17.840 --> 0:15:19.960 I can't be on the front page of the newspaper 0:15:20.240 --> 0:15:20.920 daily Mail. 0:15:21.640 --> 0:15:27.760 Oh easy, the Harolds aren't Daily Mail. So j fights 0:15:27.800 --> 0:15:28.640 that older woman. 0:15:30.080 --> 0:15:32.760 So I'm like, I'm just going to remove myself from 0:15:32.800 --> 0:15:35.640 the situation. I'm going to walk away. And as I'm 0:15:35.640 --> 0:15:37.640 walking away with this other mom, not the lady with 0:15:37.640 --> 0:15:39.760 the blue heeler, the mom who was back in my 0:15:39.840 --> 0:15:42.440 up saying think of the children, she's still yelling like 0:15:42.920 --> 0:15:46.360 just leave, just leave. As I'm walking away, and I'm like, mate, 0:15:46.360 --> 0:15:50.640 I'm leaving. Chill. And then just as I think like 0:15:50.720 --> 0:15:54.360 this can't get any worse, Marley and Lola are like, 0:15:54.400 --> 0:15:57.800 we don't want to leave the park. So they start screaming, 0:15:57.840 --> 0:15:59.440 being like, no. 0:16:01.160 --> 0:16:02.440 Go in mate. 0:16:03.040 --> 0:16:05.200 So then I've tried to put Buster back on the lead, 0:16:05.400 --> 0:16:06.680 just to be like, the last thing I need is 0:16:06.680 --> 0:16:08.080 for him to go back over to the blue heeler 0:16:08.160 --> 0:16:11.400 and comfort round two. So I'm dragging Buster on three legs. 0:16:11.400 --> 0:16:14.400 I've got a scooter. I've got a bike with training 0:16:14.440 --> 0:16:17.360 wheels on it. Yeah, Marley and Laula are both screaming 0:16:17.360 --> 0:16:19.840 like they're being abducted right now from the park. And 0:16:19.960 --> 0:16:21.920 of course I couldn't pick the car close to the park. 0:16:22.000 --> 0:16:25.320 It's like a kilometer away. So I'm walking away with 0:16:25.480 --> 0:16:27.800 these people still yelling at me, this mom still going 0:16:28.040 --> 0:16:34.680 thank God. And it made me realize parenting is such 0:16:34.680 --> 0:16:35.440 a rollercoaster. 0:16:36.560 --> 0:16:39.640 The thing is like when you say and what really 0:16:39.680 --> 0:16:41.920 resonated with me? Then and you're like, I'm carrying a 0:16:41.960 --> 0:16:44.440 scooter and a bike. We're training wheel. There's like anytime 0:16:44.480 --> 0:16:46.520 you leave the house with a scooter or a bike, 0:16:46.880 --> 0:16:50.360 you're fucking carrying that thing. After about five minutes, but 0:16:51.040 --> 0:16:54.160 you're pretty much set out and got ganged up on 0:16:54.320 --> 0:16:58.160 by everyone at the park over something someone else's dog 0:16:58.240 --> 0:17:01.040 did you poor? And then your kids want to kick 0:17:01.040 --> 0:17:02.680 off because you got to leave the part. Don't they 0:17:02.760 --> 0:17:05.240 understand the situation? Daddy's getting yelled at. 0:17:05.640 --> 0:17:08.720 Okay, please, with the love of God, just stop crying. 0:17:08.760 --> 0:17:09.480 Just leave him there. 0:17:09.920 --> 0:17:13.480 I thought about it. It's like, okay, bye, go you, 0:17:13.840 --> 0:17:14.600 I'm out of here. 0:17:14.680 --> 0:17:17.040 Think of the children. Why don't you think of my children? 0:17:17.119 --> 0:17:18.080 And I'm out of here. 0:17:20.200 --> 0:17:22.400 It didn't get physical, Thank heavens. 0:17:22.520 --> 0:17:24.680 Yeah, because you know your kids don't need to see 0:17:24.760 --> 0:17:34.879 daddy take a beating. What I wanted to ask you 0:17:35.160 --> 0:17:38.639 was your kids diet when you're looking after them? And 0:17:38.760 --> 0:17:41.520 verse when Laura is looking after your kids, Does it 0:17:41.560 --> 0:17:43.600 differ or do you feel like you sit on the 0:17:43.680 --> 0:17:45.640 same page. 0:17:46.359 --> 0:17:48.679 Well, Lash, at the moment, Laura is not around, so 0:17:48.840 --> 0:17:51.119 I just left you. So Laura is not here, the 0:17:51.160 --> 0:17:54.800 kids only have me. I think Laura's pretty good. Laura's 0:17:54.800 --> 0:17:55.199 pretty good. 0:17:55.280 --> 0:17:57.600 I'm's usually pretty good. Yeah, Dad's very much like give 0:17:57.680 --> 0:17:58.760 them whatever, the shout them up. 0:17:59.359 --> 0:18:02.960 Yeah. For example, like on the weekends, if the kids 0:18:03.000 --> 0:18:05.199 want to have lunch, which is just corn thins with 0:18:05.240 --> 0:18:07.240 a bit of butter on top. Perfect. 0:18:07.440 --> 0:18:09.879 Okay. So like for us, April was always trying to 0:18:09.920 --> 0:18:12.399 be well. She bought the Bento boxes, so she's like, 0:18:12.480 --> 0:18:17.800 make sure there's proteines, whatever, carbs, whatever. I couldn't get less. 0:18:17.840 --> 0:18:20.480 Do you guys adhere to Well obviously not because of 0:18:20.520 --> 0:18:23.720 the mint slices, but do you do like minimal sugar 0:18:23.800 --> 0:18:24.520 or like do you try? 0:18:24.720 --> 0:18:25.600 No? No, no. 0:18:26.600 --> 0:18:28.320 We went to a friend's house and they said, oh, 0:18:28.320 --> 0:18:32.119 we don't actually give young Stewart here any sugar. 0:18:32.359 --> 0:18:33.240 Stupid. 0:18:36.000 --> 0:18:37.680 But the main thing that we use with the kids 0:18:37.800 --> 0:18:39.520 is ice cream or chocolate as a bribe. 0:18:39.560 --> 0:18:42.720 Oh yeah, bribe to eat their veggies. I say, bribe 0:18:42.800 --> 0:18:43.760 until you die. 0:18:44.400 --> 0:18:45.560 You got it. There's no other way. 0:18:45.600 --> 0:18:51.520 My mum's still bribing me, just money. I shouldn't do this, 0:18:52.480 --> 0:18:56.000