1 00:00:02,800 --> 00:00:05,720 Speaker 1: It's the Happy Families podcast, the podcast for the time 2 00:00:05,760 --> 00:00:09,440 Speaker 1: poor parent who just want answers Now with me Doctor 3 00:00:09,560 --> 00:00:11,400 Speaker 1: Justin Colson, and I'm joined by Luke and Suzi, your 4 00:00:11,440 --> 00:00:14,200 Speaker 1: husband and wife radio duo, who have three young boys. 5 00:00:14,200 --> 00:00:15,960 Speaker 1: We're going to get to them in just a sec. 6 00:00:16,280 --> 00:00:21,040 Speaker 1: But before we dive into the podcast conversation today, there's 7 00:00:21,040 --> 00:00:24,120 Speaker 1: something really exciting that I want to talk to you about. 8 00:00:24,160 --> 00:00:27,560 Speaker 1: It's called a Happy Families membership, and it's something that 9 00:00:27,560 --> 00:00:31,240 Speaker 1: has just become available on the Happy Family's website. Because 10 00:00:31,240 --> 00:00:33,760 Speaker 1: parenting your child is not one big thing, it's a 11 00:00:33,760 --> 00:00:37,000 Speaker 1: million little things. And I think so too as parenting support. 12 00:00:37,240 --> 00:00:39,199 Speaker 1: Over the last little while, I've been having more and 13 00:00:39,240 --> 00:00:41,879 Speaker 1: more parents saying I just want access to you. I 14 00:00:41,920 --> 00:00:44,600 Speaker 1: want to be able to know the stuff that you know. 15 00:00:44,680 --> 00:00:46,519 Speaker 1: I want to know how to talk to my children 16 00:00:46,800 --> 00:00:48,800 Speaker 1: the way you tell me to, and I just need 17 00:00:48,800 --> 00:00:49,239 Speaker 1: a little bit. 18 00:00:49,159 --> 00:00:51,520 Speaker 2: Of extra support. And so we've put together a Happy 19 00:00:51,560 --> 00:00:54,160 Speaker 2: Families Membership, which essentially means that you can have me 20 00:00:54,560 --> 00:00:57,400 Speaker 2: parenting expert in your pocket. What you get with this 21 00:00:57,680 --> 00:00:59,600 Speaker 2: is the calm assurance that parenting can. 22 00:00:59,520 --> 00:01:01,240 Speaker 1: Be overwhelm but you don't have to do it all 23 00:01:01,280 --> 00:01:03,760 Speaker 1: on your own. You've got me as a support also 24 00:01:03,800 --> 00:01:06,160 Speaker 1: that vision and direction. You know what you want your 25 00:01:06,160 --> 00:01:08,000 Speaker 1: family to look like and feel like and be like. 26 00:01:08,560 --> 00:01:10,839 Speaker 1: My job is to help you get there, and it's 27 00:01:11,000 --> 00:01:13,400 Speaker 1: with solutions that you can trust. I want to give 28 00:01:13,400 --> 00:01:17,319 Speaker 1: you evidence based answers for all of your parenting predicaments. Now, 29 00:01:17,360 --> 00:01:19,840 Speaker 1: you probably know the challenges that I've had with my family, 30 00:01:19,880 --> 00:01:22,399 Speaker 1: and that's why I do what I do. So here's 31 00:01:22,440 --> 00:01:24,960 Speaker 1: what you get with a Happy Family's membership. For twelve 32 00:01:25,000 --> 00:01:27,280 Speaker 1: bucks a month. I lighten the load for you by 33 00:01:27,280 --> 00:01:29,959 Speaker 1: sending you a weekly email with a simple tip to 34 00:01:30,240 --> 00:01:33,200 Speaker 1: practice during the week to help make your family function better. 35 00:01:33,600 --> 00:01:34,520 Speaker 2: Now, every now and again. 36 00:01:34,319 --> 00:01:35,920 Speaker 1: It gets a bit tricky, but I know that these 37 00:01:35,959 --> 00:01:38,160 Speaker 1: tips well, they're tried and true in the furnace of 38 00:01:38,200 --> 00:01:40,320 Speaker 1: family life. On top of that, you get access to 39 00:01:40,400 --> 00:01:42,920 Speaker 1: my entire video library, all of the webcasts that I've 40 00:01:42,920 --> 00:01:45,760 Speaker 1: ever done before, all of the webinars with ideas to 41 00:01:45,840 --> 00:01:48,880 Speaker 1: help make your family function more effectively, plus a live 42 00:01:48,920 --> 00:01:52,720 Speaker 1: webinar every term or so maybe even more frequently that 43 00:01:52,800 --> 00:01:55,600 Speaker 1: maybe one or two times a term. There's ideas for 44 00:01:55,640 --> 00:01:58,120 Speaker 1: connecting with your family, having fun with your family. It's 45 00:01:58,240 --> 00:02:01,000 Speaker 1: all in this membership where we really move the needle 46 00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:03,440 Speaker 1: for your family. Now, if you want the Premium membership, 47 00:02:03,520 --> 00:02:05,880 Speaker 1: you also get access to Q and A sessions with me. 48 00:02:06,200 --> 00:02:08,880 Speaker 1: You might even end up a family under the Spotlight, 49 00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:13,239 Speaker 1: and you'll get access to my exclusive podcast Parenting Perspectives 50 00:02:13,520 --> 00:02:16,760 Speaker 1: that is not available via your usual feed. You need 51 00:02:16,800 --> 00:02:18,880 Speaker 1: to be a Happy Families Premium member to be able 52 00:02:18,880 --> 00:02:21,560 Speaker 1: to access that, So please go to happy families dot 53 00:02:21,560 --> 00:02:22,960 Speaker 1: com Do I use so that you can find out 54 00:02:22,960 --> 00:02:25,320 Speaker 1: more about those Happy Families memberships. I think they're going 55 00:02:25,360 --> 00:02:28,000 Speaker 1: to add extraordinary value to your life, and I would 56 00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:31,079 Speaker 1: be so delighted to be able to have that opportunity 57 00:02:31,120 --> 00:02:33,440 Speaker 1: to work with you a little more closely. Now I'm 58 00:02:33,440 --> 00:02:35,920 Speaker 1: with the Usual podcast. In this conversation, I talked to 59 00:02:36,080 --> 00:02:40,320 Speaker 1: an exuberant Luke and Susie about why we even need 60 00:02:40,520 --> 00:02:41,440 Speaker 1: parenting experts. 61 00:02:41,800 --> 00:02:46,520 Speaker 3: Doctor Justin Kilson from Happy Families Justin Hallo probably never 62 00:02:46,600 --> 00:02:50,040 Speaker 3: been more informed and had never had so much access 63 00:02:50,200 --> 00:02:52,919 Speaker 3: to psychology and studies and research and understanding about how 64 00:02:53,000 --> 00:02:57,080 Speaker 3: kids and people work, and yet it is so done confusing. 65 00:02:57,360 --> 00:02:59,920 Speaker 1: There's more science than ever, there are more opinions than ever, 66 00:03:00,200 --> 00:03:03,600 Speaker 1: and it may actually be that overwhelming abundance of information 67 00:03:03,680 --> 00:03:06,920 Speaker 1: that makes it, you know, we get paralysis by analysis. 68 00:03:06,960 --> 00:03:08,080 Speaker 2: You've heard that phrase before. 69 00:03:08,160 --> 00:03:10,919 Speaker 1: I'm sure there's a really interesting group of studies by 70 00:03:11,560 --> 00:03:14,760 Speaker 1: Initially the seminal work was done by a lady called 71 00:03:14,800 --> 00:03:16,880 Speaker 1: Sheila Aga, and what she was doing was she was 72 00:03:16,880 --> 00:03:19,120 Speaker 1: looking at the impact of choice. Barry Schwartz has done 73 00:03:19,160 --> 00:03:21,120 Speaker 1: some other great research in this area as well, the 74 00:03:21,160 --> 00:03:24,000 Speaker 1: impact of choice on our ability to make decisions, And 75 00:03:24,080 --> 00:03:26,560 Speaker 1: what the data seems to suggest is that the more 76 00:03:26,680 --> 00:03:29,400 Speaker 1: choice we have, you know, like we think Netflix is 77 00:03:29,440 --> 00:03:31,680 Speaker 1: going to be amazing because there's so much to choose from. 78 00:03:31,800 --> 00:03:34,079 Speaker 1: But the more choice we have, the more frustrated we become, 79 00:03:34,440 --> 00:03:36,000 Speaker 1: and the less likely it is that we'll do things. 80 00:03:36,000 --> 00:03:38,200 Speaker 1: And I think that might be a little bit about 81 00:03:38,240 --> 00:03:41,480 Speaker 1: what's happening with parenting. There are so many different ways 82 00:03:41,520 --> 00:03:43,400 Speaker 1: that we compare and we can be the gentle parent, 83 00:03:43,440 --> 00:03:45,360 Speaker 1: we can be the helicopter parent, we can be the 84 00:03:45,360 --> 00:03:47,760 Speaker 1: tiger parent. We can be the warmole parent, the snowplower parent. 85 00:03:47,880 --> 00:03:50,520 Speaker 1: We can be the authoritarian parent, the authoritative parent. We 86 00:03:50,520 --> 00:03:53,120 Speaker 1: can be you know, we can keep the little emperor parenting. 87 00:03:53,200 --> 00:03:55,280 Speaker 1: It just keeps going, which which snowplow. 88 00:03:55,440 --> 00:04:00,800 Speaker 4: The snowplower parents sounds attractive to me, but it's fascinating 89 00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:03,440 Speaker 4: because it's like, on the one hand, as there's so 90 00:04:03,560 --> 00:04:05,840 Speaker 4: much confusion in perent during there is a high demand 91 00:04:06,280 --> 00:04:09,560 Speaker 4: from what you bring in advice and clarity and simplification 92 00:04:09,640 --> 00:04:12,800 Speaker 4: of concepts and ideas to help us parent. Yet every 93 00:04:12,840 --> 00:04:15,600 Speaker 4: parent's an expert. At the same time, Well. 94 00:04:15,440 --> 00:04:17,760 Speaker 1: You know, when we have experience that gives us a 95 00:04:17,839 --> 00:04:20,279 Speaker 1: degree of expertise, it doesn't. Let me be clear, it 96 00:04:20,279 --> 00:04:22,520 Speaker 1: doesn't give us a degree. It gives us a degree 97 00:04:22,520 --> 00:04:23,279 Speaker 1: of expertise. 98 00:04:23,440 --> 00:04:24,280 Speaker 2: There is a difference. 99 00:04:24,520 --> 00:04:27,479 Speaker 1: And so because we've got experience with children and child rearing, 100 00:04:27,520 --> 00:04:29,840 Speaker 1: we feel like we've got that expert and I think 101 00:04:29,880 --> 00:04:32,679 Speaker 1: that's biologically wired into us. I mean, you think about 102 00:04:32,680 --> 00:04:34,520 Speaker 1: maybe two or three hundred years ago, there was no 103 00:04:34,520 --> 00:04:36,560 Speaker 1: one out there writing books about parenting. There were no 104 00:04:36,680 --> 00:04:39,160 Speaker 1: parenting experts. A couple of hundred years ago. What people 105 00:04:39,240 --> 00:04:41,919 Speaker 1: did was they passed on folk wisdom. They passed on 106 00:04:42,080 --> 00:04:44,919 Speaker 1: the old wives tales, all of the bits and pieces 107 00:04:44,960 --> 00:04:47,560 Speaker 1: that were folk wisdom that needed to pass from one 108 00:04:47,600 --> 00:04:50,360 Speaker 1: generation to the next. Mothers taught their daughters, fathers taught 109 00:04:50,400 --> 00:04:54,200 Speaker 1: their sons. And let's also remember childhood has been extended 110 00:04:54,360 --> 00:04:58,680 Speaker 1: extraordinarily in the modern age. Childhood never lasted this long. Well, 111 00:04:58,760 --> 00:05:00,960 Speaker 1: kids were actually you hadchildren, and they did as they 112 00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:03,000 Speaker 1: were told. They had to contribute to the farm, or 113 00:05:03,000 --> 00:05:04,680 Speaker 1: they had to contribute to the running of the house. 114 00:05:04,680 --> 00:05:07,919 Speaker 1: Whereas now we've got education and we've got extracurricular activities, 115 00:05:07,920 --> 00:05:10,840 Speaker 1: and our lives are very, very, very different, and even 116 00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:13,400 Speaker 1: in the last decade or so, the way technology has 117 00:05:14,000 --> 00:05:18,159 Speaker 1: influenced parenting so that we as a generation are facing 118 00:05:18,320 --> 00:05:22,560 Speaker 1: parenting quandaries and challenges that previous generations of parents never saw. 119 00:05:22,720 --> 00:05:23,200 Speaker 2: Exactly. 120 00:05:23,440 --> 00:05:25,640 Speaker 3: You mentioned about the old wife styles, and I was 121 00:05:25,680 --> 00:05:28,440 Speaker 3: thinking through like, so many of them are a load 122 00:05:28,480 --> 00:05:31,239 Speaker 3: of guff, and yet some of them were amazing wisdom 123 00:05:31,240 --> 00:05:33,919 Speaker 3: that we see true to this day. And it struck 124 00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:38,800 Speaker 3: me that maybe ignorance is okay. Like if people have 125 00:05:38,880 --> 00:05:42,159 Speaker 3: been turning out okay despite the wisdom being flawed for 126 00:05:42,320 --> 00:05:45,920 Speaker 3: all of humanity, then maybe we shouldn't put so much 127 00:05:45,960 --> 00:05:50,000 Speaker 3: pressure on ourselves to perfectly have every answer perfect. 128 00:05:50,320 --> 00:05:52,360 Speaker 1: Luke, I want to agree with you because it sounds 129 00:05:52,400 --> 00:05:54,039 Speaker 1: like it's a great idea, but I don't know that 130 00:05:54,080 --> 00:05:57,039 Speaker 1: people turned out okay. So if we're ok if we 131 00:05:57,040 --> 00:06:00,000 Speaker 1: look at the way, you know, certain wisdom was part 132 00:06:00,279 --> 00:06:02,920 Speaker 1: from one generation to another around discipline and the way 133 00:06:02,960 --> 00:06:05,640 Speaker 1: children should be disciplined. I mean, I've read some quotes 134 00:06:05,680 --> 00:06:08,520 Speaker 1: from early what many of them were early church leaders. 135 00:06:08,520 --> 00:06:10,120 Speaker 1: They were the ones who were usually writing the books 136 00:06:10,120 --> 00:06:12,680 Speaker 1: back then and in positions of authority, and some of 137 00:06:12,720 --> 00:06:14,520 Speaker 1: the things that they said ought to be done to 138 00:06:14,600 --> 00:06:17,120 Speaker 1: children to teach them to obey their parents better. And 139 00:06:17,160 --> 00:06:20,000 Speaker 1: we're talking in the seventeen hundreds, the eighteen hundreds, for example. 140 00:06:20,480 --> 00:06:23,400 Speaker 1: People survived, but I wouldn't say that they turned out okay. 141 00:06:23,440 --> 00:06:26,920 Speaker 1: And too many of those terrible ideas have survived into 142 00:06:26,920 --> 00:06:29,200 Speaker 1: twenty twenty. So I think we want to be a 143 00:06:29,240 --> 00:06:31,440 Speaker 1: little bit careful. Just because we got here doesn't mean 144 00:06:31,440 --> 00:06:33,239 Speaker 1: that it was all okay and that it was all 145 00:06:33,480 --> 00:06:36,200 Speaker 1: hunky dori and fine and dandy. In fact, I'm just 146 00:06:36,240 --> 00:06:38,880 Speaker 1: thinking about this whole idea of why we need parenting experts, 147 00:06:39,080 --> 00:06:43,040 Speaker 1: and I think back to my parents and my grandparents' generation, 148 00:06:43,760 --> 00:06:46,320 Speaker 1: and I think that there's a difference in that today's 149 00:06:46,360 --> 00:06:49,120 Speaker 1: parents are willing to ask questions if they're stuck, whereas 150 00:06:49,240 --> 00:06:52,680 Speaker 1: back in the day I can't imagine my parents, especially 151 00:06:52,720 --> 00:06:56,120 Speaker 1: my grandparents, sitting around and saying, Gee, what are we 152 00:06:56,120 --> 00:06:59,200 Speaker 1: going to do about these kids? And asking questions and 153 00:06:59,279 --> 00:07:02,040 Speaker 1: trying to find information about how to raise their children. 154 00:07:02,320 --> 00:07:04,400 Speaker 1: I think they were making it up as they went along, 155 00:07:04,600 --> 00:07:05,920 Speaker 1: just like the rest of us. It's just that they 156 00:07:05,960 --> 00:07:08,800 Speaker 1: didn't share their vulnerabilities and their concerns the way we do. 157 00:07:09,560 --> 00:07:11,240 Speaker 3: So I thought I was saying the whole time, I 158 00:07:11,280 --> 00:07:14,840 Speaker 3: can't believe you suggested otherwise. Lucky justin corrected you with 159 00:07:14,880 --> 00:07:15,360 Speaker 3: what you said. 160 00:07:16,880 --> 00:07:19,360 Speaker 4: Well, I am keen to talk about then, how we 161 00:07:19,520 --> 00:07:23,120 Speaker 4: overcome this confusion because we do live in a world 162 00:07:23,160 --> 00:07:26,440 Speaker 4: where there's sometimes pressure from the generation before that was 163 00:07:26,560 --> 00:07:29,720 Speaker 4: a stay at home mum generation. There's pressure from social 164 00:07:29,800 --> 00:07:32,800 Speaker 4: media about how we're supposed to look, feel, have it 165 00:07:32,840 --> 00:07:35,320 Speaker 4: all together and be all of the time, and how 166 00:07:35,320 --> 00:07:38,560 Speaker 4: our kids should be. But then there's also our instinct 167 00:07:38,600 --> 00:07:41,840 Speaker 4: that sometimes it's fighting both of those things. So where 168 00:07:41,840 --> 00:07:44,280 Speaker 4: do we find calm in the chaos of our minds 169 00:07:44,320 --> 00:07:45,480 Speaker 4: when it comes to parenting? 170 00:07:45,520 --> 00:07:48,640 Speaker 2: Then happy families dot com dot it No, I'm just. 171 00:07:48,680 --> 00:07:52,679 Speaker 4: Kidding, Yes, where. 172 00:07:52,480 --> 00:07:54,960 Speaker 1: We want to go is now I've asked parents the 173 00:07:55,000 --> 00:07:58,280 Speaker 1: same questions because I certainly don't hold myself as the 174 00:07:58,320 --> 00:07:59,640 Speaker 1: font of all wisdom. And I'm sure that there are 175 00:07:59,640 --> 00:08:02,200 Speaker 1: plenty of other quote unquote experts who are out there 176 00:08:02,200 --> 00:08:04,800 Speaker 1: who would likewise say, yeah, sure, I've got a degree 177 00:08:04,920 --> 00:08:06,840 Speaker 1: or I've written these books, but that doesn't mean that 178 00:08:06,880 --> 00:08:09,040 Speaker 1: I know what to do for every parent in every situation. 179 00:08:09,080 --> 00:08:11,200 Speaker 2: I mean, this is a tricky gig. So where do 180 00:08:11,240 --> 00:08:11,520 Speaker 2: you go? 181 00:08:11,800 --> 00:08:14,360 Speaker 1: I think that there's a couple of places that I 182 00:08:14,360 --> 00:08:16,120 Speaker 1: would point you to. The first would be I'd be 183 00:08:16,200 --> 00:08:20,120 Speaker 1: looking for people who have runs on the board and 184 00:08:20,160 --> 00:08:20,920 Speaker 1: who have done. 185 00:08:20,720 --> 00:08:24,080 Speaker 2: It very very well. The difficulty with going to people. 186 00:08:23,920 --> 00:08:26,320 Speaker 1: Who have done it very very well is sometimes sometimes 187 00:08:26,360 --> 00:08:28,480 Speaker 1: have been intentional, and sometimes they don't even know what 188 00:08:28,520 --> 00:08:30,320 Speaker 1: they did or how it worked out. I remember talking 189 00:08:30,360 --> 00:08:33,439 Speaker 1: to one guy. He had six adult children who were 190 00:08:33,679 --> 00:08:38,880 Speaker 1: just exemplars of brilliance. They'd all been good kids, none 191 00:08:38,920 --> 00:08:41,800 Speaker 1: of them had made any big bad decisions as adolescents. 192 00:08:41,960 --> 00:08:44,480 Speaker 1: They'd all gotten married and gone to UNI and gotten 193 00:08:44,520 --> 00:08:47,280 Speaker 1: fancy degrees, and I mean they were just amazing. I said, 194 00:08:47,280 --> 00:08:48,480 Speaker 1: how did you do it? And he looked at me 195 00:08:48,520 --> 00:08:52,280 Speaker 1: and said, I promise you I don't know. Oh, I 196 00:08:52,400 --> 00:08:54,000 Speaker 1: just I don't. And he said, I don't think that 197 00:08:54,040 --> 00:08:57,520 Speaker 1: I did anything differently to my brother or my friend 198 00:08:57,559 --> 00:09:00,400 Speaker 1: over here, who also had children who drove them up 199 00:09:00,440 --> 00:09:03,160 Speaker 1: the wall and who had less optimal outcomes. In fact, 200 00:09:03,200 --> 00:09:05,360 Speaker 1: sometimes I was a far worse parent than any of them, 201 00:09:05,800 --> 00:09:08,080 Speaker 1: and I just I don't know. So I think that 202 00:09:08,280 --> 00:09:10,439 Speaker 1: some people are intentional and they have great outcomes. Some 203 00:09:10,480 --> 00:09:13,079 Speaker 1: people are intentional and they don't. So going to other 204 00:09:13,080 --> 00:09:15,680 Speaker 1: people can be helpful, but it's not always going to help. 205 00:09:15,720 --> 00:09:17,679 Speaker 1: And by the way, I think it's also useful to 206 00:09:17,720 --> 00:09:21,760 Speaker 1: go to people who have made significant parenting errors and 207 00:09:21,800 --> 00:09:24,280 Speaker 1: asking them, if you've got the right relationship with them, 208 00:09:24,559 --> 00:09:26,839 Speaker 1: what have you learned as a parent, and what can 209 00:09:26,880 --> 00:09:28,199 Speaker 1: I learn from your experience? 210 00:09:28,520 --> 00:09:29,440 Speaker 2: And if they're willing to. 211 00:09:29,440 --> 00:09:32,079 Speaker 1: Be open and vulnerable, if they're on that path where 212 00:09:32,080 --> 00:09:34,040 Speaker 1: they're trying to be better, I think that we can 213 00:09:34,040 --> 00:09:37,400 Speaker 1: also learn from them. There's definitely some value in talking 214 00:09:37,400 --> 00:09:39,440 Speaker 1: to people like myself. And then this is not a 215 00:09:39,480 --> 00:09:42,480 Speaker 1: self promotional conversation, I promise, But if you're talking to 216 00:09:42,480 --> 00:09:45,560 Speaker 1: somebody who's got the PhD in psychology and who's got 217 00:09:45,559 --> 00:09:46,760 Speaker 1: the runs on the board with their own. 218 00:09:46,720 --> 00:09:49,440 Speaker 2: Children, who has done the heavy lifting. 219 00:09:49,559 --> 00:09:53,440 Speaker 1: You know that cognitive introspection the hard work to tease 220 00:09:53,520 --> 00:09:55,719 Speaker 1: apart hard answers. 221 00:09:55,480 --> 00:09:57,079 Speaker 2: Then you're always going to get great information. 222 00:09:57,200 --> 00:09:59,640 Speaker 1: There. There's one other place that I think it's worth 223 00:09:59,760 --> 00:10:01,640 Speaker 1: high lighting that we should turn to, and I think 224 00:10:01,679 --> 00:10:04,600 Speaker 1: that's God. We can get answers to prayers when it 225 00:10:04,640 --> 00:10:06,600 Speaker 1: comes to the raising of our children. If we want 226 00:10:06,600 --> 00:10:08,880 Speaker 1: to raise them well, then we should pray and ask 227 00:10:08,960 --> 00:10:12,280 Speaker 1: for help. And not everybody has a faith background, but 228 00:10:12,440 --> 00:10:15,160 Speaker 1: there are different ways that people can find those answers. 229 00:10:15,200 --> 00:10:17,480 Speaker 1: For some it might be through mindful meditation, For others 230 00:10:17,480 --> 00:10:19,600 Speaker 1: it will be through prayer. For others it'll be holy 231 00:10:19,840 --> 00:10:22,440 Speaker 1: works of writing. But I think that we need to 232 00:10:22,480 --> 00:10:25,120 Speaker 1: recognize that there is there are answers that are outside 233 00:10:25,120 --> 00:10:27,440 Speaker 1: of ourselves, and we should be humble enough to look 234 00:10:27,480 --> 00:10:28,800 Speaker 1: for them. 235 00:10:28,840 --> 00:10:29,319 Speaker 4: So good. 236 00:10:29,520 --> 00:10:32,520 Speaker 3: See, as I promised, he simplifies things good because there's 237 00:10:32,559 --> 00:10:34,520 Speaker 3: a whole lot of stuff that comes in. And I 238 00:10:34,559 --> 00:10:36,280 Speaker 3: love you know just it wouldn't be a justin causon 239 00:10:36,280 --> 00:10:39,440 Speaker 3: segment if we didn't bring in the three e's. And 240 00:10:39,520 --> 00:10:42,160 Speaker 3: I love that as an example because while we're searching 241 00:10:42,200 --> 00:10:45,240 Speaker 3: for the complicated answers, you constantly just bring it back 242 00:10:45,240 --> 00:10:48,680 Speaker 3: to no matter what the circumstance, to explore, to explain, 243 00:10:48,800 --> 00:10:52,000 Speaker 3: to empower, and this concept is just so simple to 244 00:10:52,040 --> 00:10:54,160 Speaker 3: actually we want to know what the real issue is, 245 00:10:54,200 --> 00:10:55,960 Speaker 3: we want to navigate it, and then we want to 246 00:10:55,960 --> 00:10:57,240 Speaker 3: empower something to be different. 247 00:10:57,440 --> 00:10:59,120 Speaker 2: Gee, you're good. You should write a book about that. 248 00:11:00,559 --> 00:11:01,319 Speaker 3: Look up started. 249 00:11:01,640 --> 00:11:03,080 Speaker 4: It's copyrighted work. 250 00:11:05,640 --> 00:11:08,800 Speaker 3: Doctor Justin Kilson from Happy Families, keeping it simple but 251 00:11:08,840 --> 00:11:11,000 Speaker 3: empowering us to be able to be the best parents 252 00:11:11,000 --> 00:11:13,200 Speaker 3: we can be for our kids, because quite frankly, Susie, 253 00:11:13,200 --> 00:11:13,680 Speaker 3: they're worth it. 254 00:11:13,880 --> 00:11:19,120 Speaker 2: Right. There's one more. 255 00:11:16,640 --> 00:11:19,240 Speaker 1: There's one more thing I should say, and that is 256 00:11:20,200 --> 00:11:21,960 Speaker 1: you can turn to all of those different places, but 257 00:11:22,040 --> 00:11:24,280 Speaker 1: very often the answers are inside. You don't feel like 258 00:11:24,320 --> 00:11:25,960 Speaker 1: you need to go to an expert all the time. 259 00:11:26,040 --> 00:11:28,840 Speaker 1: Sometimes yes, but sometimes the answers have just inside you 260 00:11:29,040 --> 00:11:30,080 Speaker 1: take advantage of that. 261 00:11:30,120 --> 00:11:32,120 Speaker 3: Doctor Justin Kilson, thank you so much for your time. 262 00:11:32,720 --> 00:11:35,040 Speaker 1: If you've enjoyed the podcast or found it helpful, please 263 00:11:35,080 --> 00:11:37,440 Speaker 1: do something for me. Go to Apple Podcasts if you 264 00:11:37,440 --> 00:11:40,520 Speaker 1: could leave a rating and a review. Well, it's those 265 00:11:40,559 --> 00:11:44,040 Speaker 1: reviews that help people to find the podcast and to 266 00:11:44,040 --> 00:11:46,640 Speaker 1: help themselves to make their families function even better. 267 00:11:46,920 --> 00:11:48,400 Speaker 2: I loved receiving this review. 268 00:11:48,400 --> 00:11:51,320 Speaker 1: It came through from Oscar Tromboli, who has a fabulous 269 00:11:51,360 --> 00:11:54,360 Speaker 1: podcast about deep listening himself. He gave it a five 270 00:11:54,440 --> 00:11:57,199 Speaker 1: star rating and said, thanks Justin. This is very practical 271 00:11:57,320 --> 00:12:00,000 Speaker 1: and something I can do straight away. And we also 272 00:12:00,000 --> 00:12:02,400 Speaker 1: I've got another five star rating that came through from 273 00:12:02,800 --> 00:12:06,520 Speaker 1: Seta MJD who said, I only came across this podcast 274 00:12:06,600 --> 00:12:09,280 Speaker 1: last week, but I haven't stopped listening since. It's helped 275 00:12:09,360 --> 00:12:11,480 Speaker 1: validate a number of ideas and beliefs of mine and 276 00:12:11,520 --> 00:12:13,199 Speaker 1: also challenged me on others. 277 00:12:13,600 --> 00:12:14,280 Speaker 2: So thank you. 278 00:12:14,360 --> 00:12:16,160 Speaker 1: I'd love it if you would leave a rating and 279 00:12:16,240 --> 00:12:19,040 Speaker 1: review as well at Apple Podcasts. Please do that, and 280 00:12:19,080 --> 00:12:21,000 Speaker 1: if you'd like more information on how I can help, 281 00:12:21,160 --> 00:12:23,880 Speaker 1: visit happyfamilies dot com dot au or go to my 282 00:12:23,880 --> 00:12:26,640 Speaker 1: Facebook page doctor Justin Coulson's Happy Families