1 00:00:02,960 --> 00:00:08,360 Speaker 1: Get a. I'm Lola Berry, nutritionist, author, actor, TV presenter, 2 00:00:08,640 --> 00:00:14,080 Speaker 1: and professional overshare us. This podcast is all about celebrating 3 00:00:14,160 --> 00:00:17,760 Speaker 1: failure because I believe it's a chance for us to learn, 4 00:00:18,320 --> 00:00:22,720 Speaker 1: grow and face our blind spots. Each week, A'll interview 5 00:00:22,800 --> 00:00:26,240 Speaker 1: a different guest about their highs as well as their lows, 6 00:00:26,760 --> 00:00:35,160 Speaker 1: all in a bid to inspire us to fearlessly fail. Hello, 7 00:00:35,360 --> 00:00:38,440 Speaker 1: Welcome to the pod. Today we have Luke mcleoud on. 8 00:00:38,560 --> 00:00:41,760 Speaker 1: We recorded this one over Crimbo my word for Chrissy 9 00:00:42,080 --> 00:00:42,800 Speaker 1: or Christmas. 10 00:00:43,520 --> 00:00:43,720 Speaker 2: Now. 11 00:00:43,840 --> 00:00:46,680 Speaker 1: He had bought a book out called Everyday Enlightenment and 12 00:00:46,680 --> 00:00:48,360 Speaker 1: he was here to talk about that, but we also 13 00:00:48,400 --> 00:00:53,279 Speaker 1: talk about meditation, mindfulness and how that's not only impacted 14 00:00:53,320 --> 00:00:56,360 Speaker 1: his life but also changed it heads up. He also 15 00:00:56,400 --> 00:01:00,560 Speaker 1: talks about fertility, and specifically male fertility in this chat 16 00:01:00,600 --> 00:01:04,120 Speaker 1: as well, which I thought was really refreshing because I 17 00:01:04,160 --> 00:01:06,160 Speaker 1: don't know about you, but I have shared my own 18 00:01:07,360 --> 00:01:11,160 Speaker 1: fertility story here on the pod through my own lens, 19 00:01:11,200 --> 00:01:13,600 Speaker 1: and it was just really interesting to hear it through 20 00:01:13,640 --> 00:01:16,479 Speaker 1: his lens. So Luke, thank you for being such an 21 00:01:16,480 --> 00:01:20,040 Speaker 1: open book Congrats on your book. Every Day Enlightenment is 22 00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:26,280 Speaker 1: available wherever you buy your favorite books. From officially across Australia. Now, 23 00:01:26,840 --> 00:01:28,960 Speaker 1: so grab yourself a copy and I hope you love 24 00:01:29,040 --> 00:01:31,640 Speaker 1: this chat and to you the listener, have our Ripper week. 25 00:01:33,920 --> 00:01:37,040 Speaker 1: Welcome to the pode. Luke McLeod, do you know what 26 00:01:37,120 --> 00:01:40,320 Speaker 1: happens if you get YouTube googled? Like if I type 27 00:01:40,319 --> 00:01:41,720 Speaker 1: your name into YouTube, do you want to guess what 28 00:01:41,760 --> 00:01:42,160 Speaker 1: comes up? 29 00:01:42,319 --> 00:01:45,000 Speaker 2: I think there's a bunch of It's very confusing, I 30 00:01:45,000 --> 00:01:48,160 Speaker 2: think because there's like I'm sure, yeah, I've done it. 31 00:01:48,680 --> 00:01:52,680 Speaker 1: No, but there's I am a I was born nineteen 32 00:01:52,840 --> 00:01:55,120 Speaker 1: eighty five, so for me, I was obsessed with the 33 00:01:55,120 --> 00:01:57,720 Speaker 1: TV show called McLeod's Daughters. Yes, and there was a 34 00:01:57,800 --> 00:02:02,520 Speaker 1: character called Luke McLeod and he's like romantic plot like 35 00:02:02,680 --> 00:02:03,640 Speaker 1: comes straight. 36 00:02:04,160 --> 00:02:06,240 Speaker 2: I actually didn't know that there was a person that 37 00:02:06,320 --> 00:02:08,600 Speaker 2: I called Luke. Yeah, I've heard of mclod Daughters and 38 00:02:08,639 --> 00:02:10,840 Speaker 2: I actually, well, I'm not good friends, but I'm friends 39 00:02:10,880 --> 00:02:11,920 Speaker 2: with Luke Jacobs. 40 00:02:12,160 --> 00:02:13,360 Speaker 1: Okay, who was on it? 41 00:02:13,360 --> 00:02:14,280 Speaker 2: Who was actually on it? 42 00:02:14,480 --> 00:02:19,240 Speaker 1: Yeah? Another randomen Well you should ask him all about 43 00:02:19,320 --> 00:02:21,960 Speaker 1: the actor that there was literally a Luke McLeod on 44 00:02:22,000 --> 00:02:22,320 Speaker 1: the show. 45 00:02:22,400 --> 00:02:24,480 Speaker 2: I did not know that. How funny. 46 00:02:24,760 --> 00:02:26,840 Speaker 1: McLoud Stores is one of those things that just comes 47 00:02:26,840 --> 00:02:29,640 Speaker 1: back for me, Like I've had MICHAELA. Bannis, who was 48 00:02:29,680 --> 00:02:32,280 Speaker 1: a beautiful actor off McLoud Straw is on here, and 49 00:02:32,280 --> 00:02:33,840 Speaker 1: then I had an actor on here the other day 50 00:02:34,639 --> 00:02:36,160 Speaker 1: and he's like, oh, do you know my friend in 51 00:02:36,280 --> 00:02:38,400 Speaker 1: LA and his name is Brett Tucker was like, he's 52 00:02:38,440 --> 00:02:39,400 Speaker 1: off Mcloud's Daughters. 53 00:02:39,440 --> 00:02:40,000 Speaker 2: I know he is. 54 00:02:40,880 --> 00:02:42,440 Speaker 1: I don't know why. It's one of those weird shows 55 00:02:42,440 --> 00:02:44,040 Speaker 1: that just keeps coming back from me. So there you go. 56 00:02:44,160 --> 00:02:45,480 Speaker 1: That was the first thing that came up when I 57 00:02:45,639 --> 00:02:48,040 Speaker 1: YouTube do. Then as soon as I scrolled down, it 58 00:02:48,080 --> 00:02:50,320 Speaker 1: was you pashing off with Sophie Mark. Yeah, of course. 59 00:02:51,160 --> 00:02:54,119 Speaker 1: And then it was like and then well, the next 60 00:02:54,160 --> 00:02:57,839 Speaker 1: one was like Bachelor in Paradise and some girl being 61 00:02:57,919 --> 00:03:01,000 Speaker 1: really off you about just being open if someone comes in, 62 00:03:01,200 --> 00:03:04,000 Speaker 1: like when we open to you, she was not about it. 63 00:03:04,560 --> 00:03:07,399 Speaker 1: You were in the doghouse for that one. And then 64 00:03:07,440 --> 00:03:11,359 Speaker 1: it goes straight to like meditation, mindfulness and all the 65 00:03:11,400 --> 00:03:13,240 Speaker 1: stuff that we're going to be talking about today. But 66 00:03:13,680 --> 00:03:15,880 Speaker 1: it's been a pretty cool trajectory. 67 00:03:16,919 --> 00:03:20,560 Speaker 2: Yeah, it has been a crazy journey, and I touched 68 00:03:20,560 --> 00:03:23,560 Speaker 2: about it. I'd actually do write a bit about it 69 00:03:23,560 --> 00:03:27,600 Speaker 2: in the book too much, But really about putting yourself 70 00:03:27,600 --> 00:03:31,800 Speaker 2: into uncomfortable positions and the importance of that. And yeah, 71 00:03:31,840 --> 00:03:34,520 Speaker 2: I'm sure we'll get into it, but reality TV or 72 00:03:34,560 --> 00:03:38,240 Speaker 2: a dating shaw TV was certainly doing that. 73 00:03:38,520 --> 00:03:42,800 Speaker 1: So you've mentioned the book every Day Enlightenment. I finished 74 00:03:42,800 --> 00:03:45,040 Speaker 1: at about two hours before you got here. I've been 75 00:03:45,120 --> 00:03:47,680 Speaker 1: binge reading it and you told me I have one 76 00:03:47,680 --> 00:03:49,200 Speaker 1: of the first ever copies. 77 00:03:49,360 --> 00:03:52,040 Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, I literally got my hands on a hard 78 00:03:52,040 --> 00:03:52,840 Speaker 2: copy yesterday. 79 00:03:53,800 --> 00:03:55,440 Speaker 1: How exciting. What was that feeling like? 80 00:03:56,160 --> 00:03:59,240 Speaker 2: Yeah, if it's surreal, like you would know. I think 81 00:03:59,240 --> 00:04:01,520 Speaker 2: if you can go back to your first book, I 82 00:04:01,560 --> 00:04:03,520 Speaker 2: mean you've written eleven now, which is wild. 83 00:04:04,360 --> 00:04:06,800 Speaker 1: It's that, but it's that first feeling when you get 84 00:04:06,800 --> 00:04:09,720 Speaker 1: that first hard copy and it's like, I don't have 85 00:04:09,800 --> 00:04:12,760 Speaker 1: a baby, but I like it because the writing process 86 00:04:12,800 --> 00:04:16,640 Speaker 1: is so long that even like the negotiating process can 87 00:04:16,640 --> 00:04:18,919 Speaker 1: take a month or two. And then you're like, holy 88 00:04:20,040 --> 00:04:22,479 Speaker 1: Maclis is a beautiful cover. I'm holding my hands to 89 00:04:22,520 --> 00:04:25,120 Speaker 1: the listener, like, how did you feel when you're actually 90 00:04:25,160 --> 00:04:27,080 Speaker 1: physically holding this tangible thing. 91 00:04:27,240 --> 00:04:29,799 Speaker 2: Well, the first thing I did was actually smell it. 92 00:04:29,920 --> 00:04:31,960 Speaker 1: Just I love a good book. 93 00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:35,000 Speaker 2: Smell like a book, smell new book, smell it's like 94 00:04:35,040 --> 00:04:37,320 Speaker 2: a new car where you're just going to really kind 95 00:04:37,320 --> 00:04:42,560 Speaker 2: of take it all in. I had a good smell 96 00:04:42,600 --> 00:04:42,720 Speaker 2: of it. 97 00:04:43,320 --> 00:04:45,800 Speaker 1: You do write about the senses in it. It makes it 98 00:04:45,839 --> 00:04:46,600 Speaker 1: does make sense. 99 00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:49,960 Speaker 2: Yeah, really connected with the book via smell. 100 00:04:50,520 --> 00:04:52,680 Speaker 1: You know, it's ninety eight We have ninety eight percent 101 00:04:52,760 --> 00:04:55,960 Speaker 1: of factory recall, so smell recall. So you're probably going 102 00:04:56,040 --> 00:04:59,080 Speaker 1: to remember that moment for the rest of your life. 103 00:04:59,200 --> 00:04:59,839 Speaker 2: Fire the smell. 104 00:05:00,120 --> 00:05:02,480 Speaker 1: Yeah, how cool. So the smell was the first thing 105 00:05:02,480 --> 00:05:06,320 Speaker 1: I did want to ask you, like, was it confronting 106 00:05:07,000 --> 00:05:11,760 Speaker 1: to write this? Like you're very open, you're quite honest. 107 00:05:11,920 --> 00:05:14,080 Speaker 1: Do you know one of my favorite things about the 108 00:05:14,120 --> 00:05:16,960 Speaker 1: way that you write? And I figured it out probably 109 00:05:17,000 --> 00:05:19,120 Speaker 1: like three or four pages, and I was like, you 110 00:05:19,600 --> 00:05:23,480 Speaker 1: write masculine, but you're writing about a topic that sometimes 111 00:05:23,520 --> 00:05:26,080 Speaker 1: gets seen as like a bit hippie or woo woo, 112 00:05:26,120 --> 00:05:29,400 Speaker 1: like meditation, da da, but you're kind of like there's 113 00:05:29,440 --> 00:05:32,120 Speaker 1: this You've got this no frills approach, which I find 114 00:05:32,200 --> 00:05:35,400 Speaker 1: is like that kind of like masculine might be the 115 00:05:35,400 --> 00:05:37,880 Speaker 1: wrong way, but it's like no bullshit, Like, hey, I'm 116 00:05:37,880 --> 00:05:40,640 Speaker 1: going to be real with you. Yeah, here's what I reckon. 117 00:05:40,880 --> 00:05:42,840 Speaker 1: Take it or leave it. Yeah, you kind of got 118 00:05:42,839 --> 00:05:44,000 Speaker 1: that approach to your writing. 119 00:05:44,120 --> 00:05:48,000 Speaker 2: Well, I'm that makes me so happy hearing that, because 120 00:05:48,440 --> 00:05:51,960 Speaker 2: that's really what I was trying to aim for. I mean, 121 00:05:52,000 --> 00:05:53,680 Speaker 2: I don't know if I aim for it, but because 122 00:05:53,720 --> 00:05:57,080 Speaker 2: I'm just being myself. But the whole concept of the 123 00:05:57,120 --> 00:06:00,520 Speaker 2: title is it's not so much about you have to 124 00:06:00,560 --> 00:06:03,880 Speaker 2: practice meditational mindfulness or enlightenment every day. 125 00:06:04,160 --> 00:06:04,360 Speaker 1: Yeah. 126 00:06:05,040 --> 00:06:07,800 Speaker 2: The title of the book, every day, every day Enlightenment 127 00:06:07,920 --> 00:06:12,520 Speaker 2: was more about making it for the everyday person. Yeah, 128 00:06:12,520 --> 00:06:16,040 Speaker 2: you know, and how to actually relay to that everyday 129 00:06:16,080 --> 00:06:19,719 Speaker 2: person totally. And because I just said that's all I 130 00:06:19,760 --> 00:06:23,359 Speaker 2: see myself as just a normal guy. Yeah, and I 131 00:06:23,480 --> 00:06:25,320 Speaker 2: just really want to be able to connect with people 132 00:06:25,360 --> 00:06:29,320 Speaker 2: who are just like me, so yeah, and talk and 133 00:06:29,440 --> 00:06:32,120 Speaker 2: right in that manner. So yeah, that's really happy to 134 00:06:32,160 --> 00:06:33,000 Speaker 2: hear you say that. 135 00:06:33,320 --> 00:06:35,760 Speaker 1: Well, I've deep dived it. I deep dive everybody that 136 00:06:35,800 --> 00:06:38,719 Speaker 1: comes onto this pod. So it was a lot of 137 00:06:39,320 --> 00:06:41,080 Speaker 1: fun to read, and I've got a lot of questions. 138 00:06:41,120 --> 00:06:42,800 Speaker 1: There was one thing I was like, oh, I have 139 00:06:42,880 --> 00:06:45,040 Speaker 1: to ask you about this. I've got it ready to go, 140 00:06:45,520 --> 00:06:48,240 Speaker 1: but I have to quickly not to spend too much 141 00:06:48,240 --> 00:06:51,680 Speaker 1: time in the reality TV realm. But how does one 142 00:06:51,720 --> 00:06:55,840 Speaker 1: go from was it two months in India? Like I 143 00:06:55,839 --> 00:06:58,520 Speaker 1: imagine like on a journey of self discovery and like 144 00:06:58,600 --> 00:07:01,560 Speaker 1: I think you've gone down the path as well. So 145 00:07:01,640 --> 00:07:05,960 Speaker 1: that's nonspeech, Like that's a silent meditation tree, is that right? 146 00:07:06,120 --> 00:07:08,960 Speaker 2: Yeah? Most commonly known for the ten day Solemn of Treats. 147 00:07:09,320 --> 00:07:13,600 Speaker 2: You've done that, yeah twice. Now it's very introspective. Yeah, 148 00:07:13,640 --> 00:07:14,480 Speaker 2: and it's one thing. 149 00:07:14,400 --> 00:07:17,280 Speaker 1: I'm quite scared of. Like I love a good trade. 150 00:07:17,640 --> 00:07:20,480 Speaker 1: I'm a yoga teacher. Oh mate, can you tell I'm 151 00:07:20,480 --> 00:07:21,640 Speaker 1: a chatterbox? Yeah? 152 00:07:21,800 --> 00:07:24,640 Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, which I think would be why'd be a 153 00:07:24,640 --> 00:07:26,400 Speaker 2: good challenge for you're. 154 00:07:25,880 --> 00:07:26,960 Speaker 1: Allowed to write or read? 155 00:07:27,120 --> 00:07:27,320 Speaker 2: No? 156 00:07:27,640 --> 00:07:28,960 Speaker 1: Oh wow? So it's just like. 157 00:07:29,000 --> 00:07:32,680 Speaker 2: Literally there with your own thoughts and wow, that's the 158 00:07:32,720 --> 00:07:33,400 Speaker 2: whole point of it. 159 00:07:34,080 --> 00:07:36,360 Speaker 1: So how do you go from that? Right? This whole 160 00:07:36,480 --> 00:07:40,960 Speaker 1: like almost I imagine like letting go of the ego 161 00:07:41,120 --> 00:07:45,400 Speaker 1: and this kind of like real introspective kind of phase two. Okay, 162 00:07:45,720 --> 00:07:49,080 Speaker 1: I've been given this opportunity to do reality TV and 163 00:07:49,120 --> 00:07:52,320 Speaker 1: like almost the pole opposite end of the spectrum as 164 00:07:52,400 --> 00:07:56,200 Speaker 1: far as life experience goes, Like the two very different experiences, 165 00:07:56,920 --> 00:07:58,800 Speaker 1: was it just this concept of like I want to 166 00:07:58,800 --> 00:08:00,760 Speaker 1: do stuff to get myself out of my comfort zone. 167 00:08:01,480 --> 00:08:04,960 Speaker 2: There was certainly a big part of that. The other part, 168 00:08:05,000 --> 00:08:09,440 Speaker 2: which was quite evident to me at that time, was 169 00:08:10,720 --> 00:08:14,960 Speaker 2: really trying to spend some time with people who are 170 00:08:14,960 --> 00:08:19,240 Speaker 2: not like who weren't like me. And I talk about 171 00:08:19,240 --> 00:08:22,560 Speaker 2: this in the book as a chaptercord like spending time 172 00:08:22,920 --> 00:08:26,280 Speaker 2: what was it like with unlike minded people? That's right, 173 00:08:26,760 --> 00:08:30,040 Speaker 2: and the importance of that. And I was like, Okay, 174 00:08:30,080 --> 00:08:32,440 Speaker 2: I really want to go and do something which I 175 00:08:32,480 --> 00:08:34,760 Speaker 2: never thought I would ever do in my entire life, 176 00:08:34,880 --> 00:08:38,200 Speaker 2: with people who are very different to me, and do 177 00:08:38,240 --> 00:08:45,080 Speaker 2: an experience which is completely foreign, totally scary. And yeah, 178 00:08:46,040 --> 00:08:47,800 Speaker 2: that just kind of came up and I just went, 179 00:08:48,760 --> 00:08:51,480 Speaker 2: let's just see where this leads to. And I didn't 180 00:08:51,480 --> 00:08:54,520 Speaker 2: think it was going to happen, but it happened, and 181 00:08:54,559 --> 00:08:57,400 Speaker 2: I was like, here we are. This is kind of 182 00:08:57,440 --> 00:08:59,840 Speaker 2: what you were wanting. Now you've got to go through 183 00:08:59,880 --> 00:09:00,120 Speaker 2: with it. 184 00:09:00,280 --> 00:09:03,840 Speaker 1: So was it confronting as well? Like when you came 185 00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:06,280 Speaker 1: off because you kind of like you're a front runner, 186 00:09:06,440 --> 00:09:08,600 Speaker 1: you came off, there was like heat, quite a lot 187 00:09:08,640 --> 00:09:11,040 Speaker 1: of heat on you. Didn't you then go to New Zealand. 188 00:09:11,040 --> 00:09:12,840 Speaker 1: You were like, if this I need to like, yeah, 189 00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:14,680 Speaker 1: a little being a breather totally. 190 00:09:14,760 --> 00:09:17,680 Speaker 2: Yeah, because I think I'm fairly introverted. I like spending 191 00:09:17,679 --> 00:09:20,440 Speaker 2: time with people, but a small group of people who 192 00:09:20,520 --> 00:09:22,680 Speaker 2: I know well. And again that's why for me, it 193 00:09:22,720 --> 00:09:26,160 Speaker 2: was a big challenge of spending time with unlike minded. 194 00:09:25,880 --> 00:09:30,200 Speaker 1: People and living in a mansion together. Right, like, take 195 00:09:30,200 --> 00:09:31,600 Speaker 1: a right to the limit while you're. 196 00:09:31,440 --> 00:09:34,319 Speaker 2: At it, you know what I Yeah, yeah, if you're 197 00:09:34,320 --> 00:09:36,400 Speaker 2: going to go to the extreme, do something like that. 198 00:09:37,120 --> 00:09:40,560 Speaker 2: So it was but like coming out of it, I 199 00:09:40,800 --> 00:09:43,240 Speaker 2: was like, I need to get out of this, like 200 00:09:43,320 --> 00:09:46,640 Speaker 2: I and went to New Zealand and pretty much hibernated 201 00:09:46,840 --> 00:09:50,400 Speaker 2: for nearly five to six months smart after to get 202 00:09:50,440 --> 00:09:51,520 Speaker 2: away from that. 203 00:09:51,679 --> 00:09:54,040 Speaker 1: So New Zealand's a good spot to go for something 204 00:09:54,080 --> 00:09:54,400 Speaker 1: like that. 205 00:09:54,559 --> 00:09:57,440 Speaker 2: Yeah. I probably missed out in a few opportunities, and 206 00:09:57,840 --> 00:10:01,640 Speaker 2: but just for my own men health, yeah, I needed 207 00:10:01,640 --> 00:10:03,200 Speaker 2: to do that, and I'm glad I did. 208 00:10:03,600 --> 00:10:06,120 Speaker 1: Yeah, but that's a good So that comes back to 209 00:10:06,160 --> 00:10:08,880 Speaker 1: that self awareness piece of just being like, well I 210 00:10:08,920 --> 00:10:11,520 Speaker 1: did this thing, I got really outside my concone. I 211 00:10:11,640 --> 00:10:15,960 Speaker 1: owned it, like and I and what was true? And 212 00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:18,360 Speaker 1: then you're like and I now need to like give 213 00:10:18,400 --> 00:10:22,000 Speaker 1: back to myself. That's powerful to know that there are 214 00:10:22,240 --> 00:10:23,640 Speaker 1: some things I want to ask about the books I 215 00:10:23,640 --> 00:10:26,000 Speaker 1: want to dive in. All right, can you teach us 216 00:10:26,080 --> 00:10:31,280 Speaker 1: the listeners about the Triple S threat? I just realized 217 00:10:31,280 --> 00:10:33,080 Speaker 1: I'm probably testing you here because you would have written 218 00:10:33,080 --> 00:10:33,920 Speaker 1: this book how long ago? 219 00:10:34,720 --> 00:10:37,719 Speaker 2: It's probably about eight months ago now, right, So. 220 00:10:37,720 --> 00:10:40,680 Speaker 1: You put it down, you would have re remembered it 221 00:10:40,720 --> 00:10:43,240 Speaker 1: all from the audio book. That's the thing you used 222 00:10:43,240 --> 00:10:44,840 Speaker 1: to trip me up. I would go in and do 223 00:10:44,960 --> 00:10:46,959 Speaker 1: interviews and people be like, oh, I love that recipe 224 00:10:46,960 --> 00:10:49,680 Speaker 1: on page thirty six, and I'm like, I have absolutely 225 00:10:49,720 --> 00:10:51,680 Speaker 1: I wrote it twelve months ago. I have no idea 226 00:10:51,720 --> 00:10:54,200 Speaker 1: what that is it. It could be Kabel, it could 227 00:10:54,240 --> 00:10:57,320 Speaker 1: be a stake. I have no idea. So if I 228 00:10:57,360 --> 00:10:57,719 Speaker 1: put you. 229 00:10:57,679 --> 00:11:00,200 Speaker 2: On this, what did you what do you think the 230 00:11:00,200 --> 00:11:03,840 Speaker 2: Triple S for it? You tell me, I got. 231 00:11:03,720 --> 00:11:07,080 Speaker 1: Notes here, But it's the social media society slash the 232 00:11:07,120 --> 00:11:11,480 Speaker 1: system and then suppressants and you kind of dial in 233 00:11:11,520 --> 00:11:13,600 Speaker 1: a bit with the suppressants bit around booze. 234 00:11:13,800 --> 00:11:14,079 Speaker 2: Yeah. 235 00:11:14,440 --> 00:11:17,360 Speaker 1: Yeah, is that because it has been a suppressant for you? 236 00:11:17,920 --> 00:11:20,640 Speaker 2: It has been at times. If I'm being honest, and 237 00:11:21,640 --> 00:11:25,959 Speaker 2: it can still be if I'm not aware enough of it. 238 00:11:26,720 --> 00:11:29,440 Speaker 2: So yeah, it's it's and that's a say in the book. 239 00:11:29,559 --> 00:11:33,280 Speaker 2: It's I don't tell people that they shouldn't drink. What 240 00:11:33,360 --> 00:11:36,000 Speaker 2: I try to do with that particular point is make 241 00:11:36,080 --> 00:11:36,880 Speaker 2: people aware. 242 00:11:37,400 --> 00:11:38,920 Speaker 1: You friendly invite us. 243 00:11:38,960 --> 00:11:43,680 Speaker 2: Yes, friendly invite people to just maybe just yeah, just 244 00:11:44,679 --> 00:11:48,440 Speaker 2: some awareness around the influence that alcohol can have on 245 00:11:48,920 --> 00:11:51,839 Speaker 2: or why you're taking it and the influence on it's 246 00:11:51,880 --> 00:11:53,720 Speaker 2: having on you as an individual. 247 00:11:53,760 --> 00:11:56,080 Speaker 1: And yeah, well, and that's what we were talking about 248 00:11:56,120 --> 00:11:59,840 Speaker 1: before this pod. Because I am someone that's often turned 249 00:11:59,880 --> 00:12:02,400 Speaker 1: to food as a suppressant or like if I don't 250 00:12:02,400 --> 00:12:05,760 Speaker 1: want to feel something, I know a caramelo koala or 251 00:12:05,760 --> 00:12:07,280 Speaker 1: two can make me feel pretty good, you know what 252 00:12:07,320 --> 00:12:09,000 Speaker 1: I mean. Or like there's people that are addicted to 253 00:12:09,040 --> 00:12:11,960 Speaker 1: shopping or gambling or sex or drugs. There are all 254 00:12:12,000 --> 00:12:15,680 Speaker 1: these different ways of and I also think not to 255 00:12:15,720 --> 00:12:17,840 Speaker 1: throw its on the head, but there are like spiritual 256 00:12:17,920 --> 00:12:22,560 Speaker 1: hippie ways that we can totally suppress and kind of 257 00:12:22,720 --> 00:12:25,000 Speaker 1: use the wrong kind of way. 258 00:12:25,240 --> 00:12:26,880 Speaker 2: Don even use meditation that way. 259 00:12:27,040 --> 00:12:29,400 Speaker 1: He has like an escapism from feeling what you're. 260 00:12:29,280 --> 00:12:34,360 Speaker 2: Really totally yeah, and being mindful of that is really 261 00:12:34,440 --> 00:12:38,480 Speaker 2: tricky because people use whatever they anything almost to kind 262 00:12:38,520 --> 00:12:43,680 Speaker 2: of conceal suppress emotions, and particularly if it feels good, 263 00:12:43,920 --> 00:12:49,120 Speaker 2: like oh yeah, can do that in the short term absolutely. 264 00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:53,400 Speaker 1: But also I think feeling sad can feel good sometimes, 265 00:12:53,440 --> 00:12:56,600 Speaker 1: like that real sitting in that melancholy there is such 266 00:12:56,640 --> 00:12:58,960 Speaker 1: a comfort that comes from that and listening to sad 267 00:12:59,040 --> 00:13:02,280 Speaker 1: music and watch the Notebook for Girl like on Revine, 268 00:13:02,280 --> 00:13:04,400 Speaker 1: you know what I mean, Like this's that that that 269 00:13:04,400 --> 00:13:07,960 Speaker 1: that addiction almost peace to yes, to the booze, but 270 00:13:08,000 --> 00:13:10,600 Speaker 1: it can be to a less orr of other things. 271 00:13:10,640 --> 00:13:12,440 Speaker 1: And I like that you touched on that because I 272 00:13:12,440 --> 00:13:15,520 Speaker 1: was like, oh shit, that booze for some people would 273 00:13:15,520 --> 00:13:18,200 Speaker 1: be like what sugar would be for me, and like 274 00:13:18,280 --> 00:13:23,720 Speaker 1: that super comfort, Like yeah, that pacifier in a way. 275 00:13:23,840 --> 00:13:27,760 Speaker 2: Yeah, And it's I really try to not demonize it 276 00:13:27,800 --> 00:13:30,520 Speaker 2: and say that it's a bad thing. Like we all 277 00:13:30,559 --> 00:13:33,199 Speaker 2: know that alcohol is bad for us, right, just like 278 00:13:33,640 --> 00:13:36,520 Speaker 2: sugary foods. We know that. But and a little bit 279 00:13:36,559 --> 00:13:39,360 Speaker 2: here and there is totally fine, nice whiskey or something 280 00:13:39,600 --> 00:13:43,160 Speaker 2: exactly as we're just talking about earlier. But it's the 281 00:13:43,160 --> 00:13:46,680 Speaker 2: whole awareness around it. How aware are you of the 282 00:13:46,760 --> 00:13:49,960 Speaker 2: influence it's having on you, and are you aware that 283 00:13:50,000 --> 00:13:53,720 Speaker 2: it's maybe getting a hold of you and or you're 284 00:13:53,840 --> 00:13:57,040 Speaker 2: using it, as we've touched on to suppress certain things 285 00:13:57,120 --> 00:13:59,840 Speaker 2: or to avoid dealing with certain things. So that's what 286 00:13:59,880 --> 00:14:02,079 Speaker 2: I really trying to shine a line on when talking 287 00:14:02,120 --> 00:14:05,000 Speaker 2: about Yeah, that's the presence alcohol of other things is 288 00:14:05,080 --> 00:14:08,719 Speaker 2: just ask yourself some questions around how much control does 289 00:14:08,760 --> 00:14:10,959 Speaker 2: it have over me? Why am I taking it? When 290 00:14:11,000 --> 00:14:13,520 Speaker 2: am I taking it? What are the reasons? Yeah, why 291 00:14:13,559 --> 00:14:18,760 Speaker 2: I'm drinking? You know? So yeah, dis asked mindful bringing 292 00:14:18,760 --> 00:14:19,640 Speaker 2: some awareness around it. 293 00:14:19,800 --> 00:14:22,400 Speaker 1: There's a good I remember us during one day with 294 00:14:22,440 --> 00:14:24,440 Speaker 1: Sarah Wilson, you know, the Health and Wellness I quit 295 00:14:24,480 --> 00:14:26,640 Speaker 1: sugar kind of author, and she was like, if you 296 00:14:26,720 --> 00:14:29,800 Speaker 1: find you can't go a day or two without something, 297 00:14:30,520 --> 00:14:33,080 Speaker 1: maybe having too much. And I was like, what about coffee, mate? 298 00:14:34,120 --> 00:14:36,560 Speaker 1: I cannot go a day without coffee, like I cannot. 299 00:14:37,440 --> 00:14:39,400 Speaker 1: And she was like, well, there you go, Lola, you 300 00:14:39,400 --> 00:14:41,280 Speaker 1: should probably take a break from coffee. And I was like, 301 00:14:41,360 --> 00:14:45,160 Speaker 1: that is one thing I'm not unless I'm in a 302 00:14:45,200 --> 00:14:48,640 Speaker 1: retreat where I'm prepared to go through the withdrawals and 303 00:14:49,720 --> 00:14:51,640 Speaker 1: like that, caffeine withdraw headache and all that for a 304 00:14:51,640 --> 00:14:54,240 Speaker 1: fewer unless I'm in a safe environment to do that 305 00:14:55,480 --> 00:14:58,600 Speaker 1: the joy it brings. But also I'm also aware that 306 00:14:58,640 --> 00:15:01,640 Speaker 1: I'm not using it to like hide another or like 307 00:15:01,760 --> 00:15:04,440 Speaker 1: band aid a feeling that I'm avoiding because to me, 308 00:15:04,640 --> 00:15:07,720 Speaker 1: from what I can understand, your whole shtick is really 309 00:15:07,800 --> 00:15:12,160 Speaker 1: just like, get connected with yourself, be present to this 310 00:15:12,320 --> 00:15:14,400 Speaker 1: moment now so that you can get the most out 311 00:15:14,400 --> 00:15:16,440 Speaker 1: of life. That much China your. 312 00:15:16,320 --> 00:15:20,800 Speaker 2: Mantra, Yeah, well to give Like, I think the core 313 00:15:21,560 --> 00:15:24,680 Speaker 2: concept of the book is trying to bring or develop 314 00:15:24,800 --> 00:15:28,480 Speaker 2: your own level of awareness, whether that's about yourself or 315 00:15:28,520 --> 00:15:31,720 Speaker 2: the people around you and your environment. Yeah, I think 316 00:15:31,800 --> 00:15:37,000 Speaker 2: that it just leads to so much, so many answers. Yeah, 317 00:15:37,240 --> 00:15:38,240 Speaker 2: really about everything. 318 00:15:38,240 --> 00:15:41,080 Speaker 1: If you contact to that uncomfory picture as well though, ye, 319 00:15:41,520 --> 00:15:44,800 Speaker 1: Like it's scary to sit in like sit in something 320 00:15:44,840 --> 00:15:47,160 Speaker 1: to process it to then be self aware of that 321 00:15:47,200 --> 00:15:48,720 Speaker 1: part of yourself. Does that make sense? 322 00:15:48,720 --> 00:15:51,360 Speaker 2: Well, the awareness comes almost first, Like if you've developed 323 00:15:51,360 --> 00:15:54,200 Speaker 2: your awareness first, then you can actually go, oh geez, yeah, 324 00:15:54,240 --> 00:15:56,880 Speaker 2: I do something going on it? Yeah right, But most 325 00:15:56,960 --> 00:16:00,200 Speaker 2: people don't even get to that point. You reckon No, Yeah, 326 00:16:00,240 --> 00:16:04,560 Speaker 2: not unless something dramatic happens in their life which forces 327 00:16:04,600 --> 00:16:08,480 Speaker 2: them or they get to a breakdown point where they're 328 00:16:08,480 --> 00:16:12,120 Speaker 2: forced to do something that I loved one health failure 329 00:16:12,200 --> 00:16:16,440 Speaker 2: or something like that. But it's pretty rare that someone 330 00:16:16,520 --> 00:16:20,000 Speaker 2: has a level of awareness of themselves to be proactive 331 00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:24,360 Speaker 2: in changing something which they need to change. Really until 332 00:16:24,360 --> 00:16:26,400 Speaker 2: it gets to a point like, it's pretty rare. That's 333 00:16:26,400 --> 00:16:27,960 Speaker 2: why I touched on the book of. 334 00:16:27,880 --> 00:16:29,560 Speaker 1: Saying you say that I don't have a breakdown. 335 00:16:29,720 --> 00:16:31,560 Speaker 2: Yeah, you can either choose to have a breakdown or 336 00:16:31,600 --> 00:16:33,080 Speaker 2: you can choose to meditate. What do you want to do? 337 00:16:33,240 --> 00:16:35,200 Speaker 1: This comes back to your style of writing that is 338 00:16:35,280 --> 00:16:37,800 Speaker 1: quite like masculine. You literally write that you're like, which 339 00:16:37,800 --> 00:16:42,360 Speaker 1: would you or rather breakdown or meditates? Yeah, it's quite 340 00:16:42,400 --> 00:16:44,800 Speaker 1: refreshing because I read a lot of this genre of 341 00:16:44,880 --> 00:16:47,160 Speaker 1: book because I write it myself for them in it 342 00:16:47,520 --> 00:16:49,600 Speaker 1: and I'm fascinated. And I know this is a bit 343 00:16:49,600 --> 00:16:51,760 Speaker 1: more of a behind the scenes of the book writing process, 344 00:16:52,360 --> 00:16:54,920 Speaker 1: But did you have an editor that you work quite 345 00:16:54,920 --> 00:16:57,680 Speaker 1: closely with to keep the tone of your voice. 346 00:16:57,400 --> 00:17:01,200 Speaker 2: To start off with, I think the first couple of 347 00:17:01,760 --> 00:17:05,320 Speaker 2: chapters I did, yeah, and then she was just like, 348 00:17:06,000 --> 00:17:09,240 Speaker 2: can you please stop sending this to me, like, because 349 00:17:09,280 --> 00:17:11,440 Speaker 2: if the more you send this to me, the more 350 00:17:11,480 --> 00:17:13,160 Speaker 2: you'll probably start to question yourself. 351 00:17:13,400 --> 00:17:13,840 Speaker 1: Yeah. 352 00:17:13,880 --> 00:17:18,119 Speaker 2: So she just said, just right, you're doing great. Oh yeah. 353 00:17:18,240 --> 00:17:21,720 Speaker 2: It was the exact advice I needed. It was just like, 354 00:17:21,800 --> 00:17:24,480 Speaker 2: you're doing great. Yeah, I don't want to see it again. Yeah, 355 00:17:24,560 --> 00:17:25,159 Speaker 2: I trust you. 356 00:17:25,840 --> 00:17:28,920 Speaker 1: Just write and then then once you've done the whole manuscript, 357 00:17:28,920 --> 00:17:31,240 Speaker 1: you've got markups, like so there's like little bits that 358 00:17:31,280 --> 00:17:33,600 Speaker 1: needed changing or moving or if you repeat yourself, all 359 00:17:33,600 --> 00:17:34,280 Speaker 1: that kind of stuff. 360 00:17:34,320 --> 00:17:36,760 Speaker 2: I was so scared because I pretty much wrote the 361 00:17:37,240 --> 00:17:40,960 Speaker 2: I reckon ninety percent of the book. Yeah, like with 362 00:17:41,080 --> 00:17:42,800 Speaker 2: no one else reading a word of it. 363 00:17:43,119 --> 00:17:44,879 Speaker 1: Oh really Yeah, And. 364 00:17:44,920 --> 00:17:46,760 Speaker 2: Then I sent it to and I was just like, 365 00:17:46,800 --> 00:17:48,080 Speaker 2: what if they hate it? What if I got to 366 00:17:48,080 --> 00:17:49,120 Speaker 2: rewrite the whole thing? 367 00:17:49,720 --> 00:17:52,760 Speaker 1: I mean, writing a book is scary. It takes guy. Yeah, 368 00:17:52,840 --> 00:17:53,719 Speaker 1: it's not easy. 369 00:17:53,800 --> 00:17:56,919 Speaker 2: I don't think it's so not easy, particularly if you're not, 370 00:17:56,960 --> 00:17:59,760 Speaker 2: like I'm not a trained author at all, a trained 371 00:17:59,760 --> 00:18:02,640 Speaker 2: author either, totally find English at school. 372 00:18:02,440 --> 00:18:06,120 Speaker 1: Same, same, same, But your tone comes through. That's why 373 00:18:06,160 --> 00:18:09,400 Speaker 1: I ask that question, Like it sounds like, so sometimes 374 00:18:09,440 --> 00:18:12,640 Speaker 1: when you read this genre of books and nonfiction personal developments. 375 00:18:12,680 --> 00:18:15,160 Speaker 1: Sometimes you can hear the author speaking to you, which 376 00:18:15,280 --> 00:18:18,679 Speaker 1: in your case can Last week I interviewed Matt Preston. 377 00:18:18,720 --> 00:18:20,719 Speaker 1: It literally felt like he was in my ear like 378 00:18:20,800 --> 00:18:22,679 Speaker 1: reading it to me. You know, that fit that feeling, 379 00:18:23,160 --> 00:18:26,159 Speaker 1: and I think that that's a testament to yes, a 380 00:18:26,200 --> 00:18:28,720 Speaker 1: great author, but also an author and a publisher that 381 00:18:28,720 --> 00:18:31,080 Speaker 1: have found a great fit for an editor because we 382 00:18:31,119 --> 00:18:34,240 Speaker 1: all have editors. Like editors make sure that it's cohesive 383 00:18:34,440 --> 00:18:37,240 Speaker 1: and you're not making the same spelling mistake over and 384 00:18:37,280 --> 00:18:39,439 Speaker 1: over again. Well, you know, I like little things that 385 00:18:39,480 --> 00:18:43,080 Speaker 1: we don't really think about, and so I'm really happy 386 00:18:43,080 --> 00:18:46,520 Speaker 1: that your voice is like there the whole way through. 387 00:18:46,560 --> 00:18:48,479 Speaker 1: And I love the way you don't sugar coat it. Yes, 388 00:18:48,520 --> 00:18:51,600 Speaker 1: we're talking about mindfulness. We're talking about meditation and your 389 00:18:51,680 --> 00:18:55,320 Speaker 1: experience of it, and there is like guided practices throughout it, 390 00:18:55,359 --> 00:18:57,560 Speaker 1: which I love. I have to ask you about the. 391 00:18:57,600 --> 00:19:00,480 Speaker 2: Death meditation that it's really. 392 00:19:00,359 --> 00:19:02,520 Speaker 1: Confronting to read about it, but in a good way. 393 00:19:02,640 --> 00:19:05,320 Speaker 1: And I read that you do it on the first 394 00:19:05,359 --> 00:19:08,440 Speaker 1: day of every month. Is that true. Is that so 395 00:19:08,480 --> 00:19:10,919 Speaker 1: that you have a more comfortable relationship with death or 396 00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:13,119 Speaker 1: is that so you get more out of life as 397 00:19:13,160 --> 00:19:14,120 Speaker 1: a result of that perspective. 398 00:19:14,160 --> 00:19:19,159 Speaker 2: Think it's a bit of both. Yeah, So it's I 399 00:19:19,160 --> 00:19:23,480 Speaker 2: think probably more so gratitude for life was what comes 400 00:19:23,480 --> 00:19:26,080 Speaker 2: out of it. It's just like, oh, man, like, I'm 401 00:19:26,119 --> 00:19:28,920 Speaker 2: so grateful that I'm here, you know, and get to 402 00:19:28,960 --> 00:19:33,400 Speaker 2: live this life. That's what is the initial response that 403 00:19:33,440 --> 00:19:38,240 Speaker 2: I usually have after doing it. But it also later on, 404 00:19:38,480 --> 00:19:43,080 Speaker 2: like it does have a more of a slower influence 405 00:19:43,160 --> 00:19:45,600 Speaker 2: on getting cut more comfortable with death, I think as 406 00:19:45,640 --> 00:19:48,280 Speaker 2: well over time, the more you do it, you kind 407 00:19:48,280 --> 00:19:51,280 Speaker 2: of like, because you have that sense of gratitude, you're 408 00:19:51,280 --> 00:19:53,719 Speaker 2: trying to do as much as you can with life, 409 00:19:53,840 --> 00:19:57,159 Speaker 2: and you're like, Okay, if whatever happens tomorrow I hit 410 00:19:57,160 --> 00:20:01,560 Speaker 2: by a bass. The classic cliche all is like, would 411 00:20:01,560 --> 00:20:04,920 Speaker 2: I be okay with that? Yeah? I mean no, I 412 00:20:05,040 --> 00:20:06,960 Speaker 2: got of course I wouldn't be. I'm not going to 413 00:20:06,960 --> 00:20:12,399 Speaker 2: go walking out essentially, yeah right, yeah, so, and I'm 414 00:20:12,440 --> 00:20:15,840 Speaker 2: pretty comfortable if I was to go, I'd be like, yeah, 415 00:20:16,160 --> 00:20:19,160 Speaker 2: I'm pretty happy with what I've done so far. I'd 416 00:20:19,200 --> 00:20:20,000 Speaker 2: love to do a lot more. 417 00:20:20,160 --> 00:20:21,400 Speaker 1: Yeah, of course, but I'm. 418 00:20:21,320 --> 00:20:24,040 Speaker 2: Still at peace with if that's the case. 419 00:20:24,440 --> 00:20:26,640 Speaker 1: So do you think that also comes down to this 420 00:20:26,720 --> 00:20:31,040 Speaker 1: like consistent meditation and mindfulness practice. So for me, I 421 00:20:31,119 --> 00:20:33,760 Speaker 1: am a big yogi, love yoga, teach yoga, done on 422 00:20:33,800 --> 00:20:36,480 Speaker 1: my advanced teacher trainings, all that kind of thing. But 423 00:20:37,040 --> 00:20:39,679 Speaker 1: we spend a lot of time in shavasna, which literally 424 00:20:39,680 --> 00:20:43,639 Speaker 1: translates to corpse pose like a mini death. Every yoga 425 00:20:43,720 --> 00:20:45,879 Speaker 1: practice at the end you have a mini death and 426 00:20:45,960 --> 00:20:48,120 Speaker 1: mini rebirth, and then when you get off your mats, 427 00:20:48,600 --> 00:20:50,640 Speaker 1: you've had a death. So you eat. Whether you've shared 428 00:20:50,640 --> 00:20:52,679 Speaker 1: a bit of yourself or whether it's just like a 429 00:20:52,680 --> 00:20:56,560 Speaker 1: little perspective shift. And it was really interesting reading about 430 00:20:56,600 --> 00:20:59,080 Speaker 1: the way you're so passionate about meditation, and I was like, 431 00:20:59,640 --> 00:21:03,480 Speaker 1: I don't. I don't consistently meditate. I'm trained in vading meditation. 432 00:21:03,960 --> 00:21:07,560 Speaker 1: You know, I've got my mantra, all that jazz. But 433 00:21:07,680 --> 00:21:10,240 Speaker 1: I noticed like, if I'm doing yoga, I'm more inclined 434 00:21:10,280 --> 00:21:13,240 Speaker 1: to sit on my mat and spend five, ten, fifteen 435 00:21:13,280 --> 00:21:17,400 Speaker 1: minutes do it meditating. But that's not going to happen 436 00:21:17,480 --> 00:21:19,480 Speaker 1: every day. But I do like the way you make 437 00:21:19,880 --> 00:21:22,840 Speaker 1: meditation like achieve all you like. It can be five 438 00:21:22,840 --> 00:21:25,000 Speaker 1: minutes a day, it can be like twenty minutes is 439 00:21:25,000 --> 00:21:25,880 Speaker 1: a sweet spot for you. 440 00:21:25,960 --> 00:21:29,000 Speaker 2: Is that correct? Yeah, I think twenty minutes is kind 441 00:21:29,040 --> 00:21:33,560 Speaker 2: of the sweet spot for meditation if you're starting out, 442 00:21:33,760 --> 00:21:36,240 Speaker 2: I don't think you need to do that much. Just 443 00:21:36,280 --> 00:21:40,320 Speaker 2: start with five minutes and then gradually work your way 444 00:21:40,400 --> 00:21:45,080 Speaker 2: up to around that twenty minute mark. Anything more than 445 00:21:45,080 --> 00:21:47,640 Speaker 2: that I don't think is overly necessary in the day 446 00:21:47,680 --> 00:21:51,080 Speaker 2: to day. Like, sure, if you want to challenge yourself, 447 00:21:50,840 --> 00:21:52,680 Speaker 2: if the more you go with it to an hour, 448 00:21:53,000 --> 00:21:54,720 Speaker 2: if you can see how you go with that, But 449 00:21:55,480 --> 00:21:57,280 Speaker 2: kind of like physical exercise that you've got to work 450 00:21:57,320 --> 00:21:59,200 Speaker 2: up a bit of a sweat, but if you overtrain, 451 00:21:59,280 --> 00:22:01,320 Speaker 2: you can still over train. Yeah, too much. 452 00:22:01,560 --> 00:22:03,880 Speaker 1: And then that comes back to that escape. Isn't you're 453 00:22:03,880 --> 00:22:06,280 Speaker 1: just using it to escape That's right, big chunks of 454 00:22:06,280 --> 00:22:08,040 Speaker 1: the day or like things you don't want to face. 455 00:22:08,320 --> 00:22:13,280 Speaker 2: Yeah, which is interesting. Yeah, And it's that a lot 456 00:22:13,320 --> 00:22:16,520 Speaker 2: of people think that meditation is just something to do 457 00:22:16,600 --> 00:22:18,679 Speaker 2: to relax, which is you can use it for that, 458 00:22:18,720 --> 00:22:20,920 Speaker 2: and it's wonderful to use to just calm them on 459 00:22:21,160 --> 00:22:24,600 Speaker 2: and and chill that for a period of time. But 460 00:22:24,960 --> 00:22:27,159 Speaker 2: and again in the book, as I point this out, 461 00:22:27,320 --> 00:22:31,520 Speaker 2: there's different types or different stages of meditation. That you 462 00:22:31,560 --> 00:22:35,879 Speaker 2: can do, which can really kind of uncover deal with 463 00:22:35,960 --> 00:22:39,080 Speaker 2: so many more things than just using it for relaxation. 464 00:22:39,680 --> 00:22:41,760 Speaker 1: Yeah, so you do. Stage one is like that calming, 465 00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:43,359 Speaker 1: and Stage she was more the processing. 466 00:22:43,520 --> 00:22:44,840 Speaker 2: That's right, yeah, Binger. 467 00:22:45,040 --> 00:22:48,040 Speaker 1: And then I like the way you talk about six cents. Yeah, 468 00:22:48,160 --> 00:22:50,320 Speaker 1: can you share a little bit about that. Oh he's 469 00:22:50,320 --> 00:22:51,440 Speaker 1: me putting you on the spot. 470 00:22:51,200 --> 00:22:54,000 Speaker 2: Again with all put on? No, no, no, you know 471 00:22:54,280 --> 00:22:57,359 Speaker 2: yeah yeah yeah, yeah, oh hell if not? Well, yeah, 472 00:22:57,520 --> 00:23:00,399 Speaker 2: it's something we all know. Our five senses, Yeah, the 473 00:23:00,400 --> 00:23:03,840 Speaker 2: ones that we touch, feel, smell, Yeah, there's a few 474 00:23:03,840 --> 00:23:09,520 Speaker 2: other yeah, yeah, yeah, I say the sixth sense is 475 00:23:09,560 --> 00:23:12,240 Speaker 2: the one that kind of sits behind all of those senses. 476 00:23:12,800 --> 00:23:18,080 Speaker 2: It's the awareness sense. And after you meditate for a 477 00:23:18,119 --> 00:23:22,399 Speaker 2: while and you use initially your primary sensors like touch 478 00:23:22,560 --> 00:23:26,359 Speaker 2: or feeling, the moving through your body or a mantra 479 00:23:26,640 --> 00:23:30,760 Speaker 2: could be, for a while, you begin to notice that, yeah, 480 00:23:30,800 --> 00:23:34,080 Speaker 2: that level of there's something behind all this. And there's 481 00:23:34,119 --> 00:23:37,159 Speaker 2: the witness, there's the observer, there's the what I call 482 00:23:37,200 --> 00:23:40,000 Speaker 2: the sixth sense, which is behind the five senses. 483 00:23:40,359 --> 00:23:42,880 Speaker 1: I like it. Yeah, it's a good concept. 484 00:23:43,560 --> 00:23:45,600 Speaker 2: I stole a lot of Bruce Willis. 485 00:23:47,320 --> 00:23:48,600 Speaker 1: I was going to say what I was reading, I 486 00:23:48,600 --> 00:23:50,000 Speaker 1: was like, is there going to be some little joke 487 00:23:50,040 --> 00:23:54,399 Speaker 1: about sixth sense the movie? There? It is well, And 488 00:23:54,640 --> 00:23:56,320 Speaker 1: I like the way you talk about the witness because 489 00:23:56,560 --> 00:24:00,760 Speaker 1: not to make it about yogs, but Sanskrit shuckshin means 490 00:24:00,800 --> 00:24:04,919 Speaker 1: to stand and bear witness, even if you're standing in 491 00:24:04,920 --> 00:24:08,080 Speaker 1: the fire. And so you you also talk a bit 492 00:24:08,119 --> 00:24:12,199 Speaker 1: about not being too reactive, which is super easy, like 493 00:24:12,720 --> 00:24:14,840 Speaker 1: to get your head around the concept of it, but 494 00:24:15,040 --> 00:24:19,359 Speaker 1: like when you're in the fire, it is quite hard 495 00:24:19,480 --> 00:24:24,280 Speaker 1: to not react, especially if it's something that you care about, 496 00:24:24,400 --> 00:24:27,720 Speaker 1: you're attached to, or you know, and it's quite hard 497 00:24:27,760 --> 00:24:29,480 Speaker 1: to regulate yourself and be like. 498 00:24:30,119 --> 00:24:34,080 Speaker 2: Yeah, of course, yeah right. It's always easier said than done, 499 00:24:34,160 --> 00:24:37,800 Speaker 2: one hundred percent. And that's again why I love meditation 500 00:24:37,960 --> 00:24:41,840 Speaker 2: so much, is because you can use it to train yourself. 501 00:24:42,040 --> 00:24:44,439 Speaker 2: So when you are dealing with that in the moment, 502 00:24:45,560 --> 00:24:49,360 Speaker 2: you're building up that muscle of not reacting but more 503 00:24:49,400 --> 00:24:52,439 Speaker 2: responding because you've used meditation as what I like to 504 00:24:52,440 --> 00:24:56,639 Speaker 2: call as a life simulator. God it right. So in 505 00:24:56,680 --> 00:25:02,360 Speaker 2: the processing stage of using meditations, you invite scenarios, difficult 506 00:25:02,960 --> 00:25:06,399 Speaker 2: things that you might be suppressing or things that. So, 507 00:25:06,520 --> 00:25:09,040 Speaker 2: for example, you had an argument with your partner the 508 00:25:09,119 --> 00:25:15,119 Speaker 2: day before, you can use your meditation practice to play 509 00:25:15,119 --> 00:25:19,560 Speaker 2: out that scenario in your head, observe it, witness it 510 00:25:19,600 --> 00:25:22,119 Speaker 2: from both sides, how you responded, how you react in 511 00:25:22,160 --> 00:25:25,199 Speaker 2: that time, and then just ask yourself questions, Right, well, 512 00:25:25,400 --> 00:25:27,080 Speaker 2: how did I respond to that? Could have ideal with 513 00:25:27,160 --> 00:25:30,320 Speaker 2: that better, you know, and then you're kind of simulating 514 00:25:30,359 --> 00:25:31,480 Speaker 2: that scenario. 515 00:25:31,920 --> 00:25:34,320 Speaker 1: So then when you come to it, yeah, actually have 516 00:25:34,400 --> 00:25:36,400 Speaker 1: the combo or to follow it up. You can be late, 517 00:25:37,160 --> 00:25:38,800 Speaker 1: yeah much calmer. 518 00:25:38,760 --> 00:25:41,280 Speaker 2: Well, yeah, totally. Or if there's a similar situation in 519 00:25:41,280 --> 00:25:44,160 Speaker 2: the future, because you've done that, you've taken the time 520 00:25:44,240 --> 00:25:47,840 Speaker 2: to process, ask yourself questions, give yourself perspective, kind of 521 00:25:47,880 --> 00:25:51,600 Speaker 2: zoom out. If and when that happens again, you're more 522 00:25:51,800 --> 00:25:55,439 Speaker 2: likely going to be approach it in a different manner. 523 00:25:55,560 --> 00:25:58,880 Speaker 1: It almost sounds like there, I'm big, I'm super po therapy, 524 00:25:59,160 --> 00:26:00,680 Speaker 1: and I think you've got to thing where you like 525 00:26:00,760 --> 00:26:01,800 Speaker 1: be your own therapist. 526 00:26:01,920 --> 00:26:04,160 Speaker 2: You write about that you are your best therapist. 527 00:26:04,440 --> 00:26:07,040 Speaker 1: Yeah, there was. So this is the bit I really 528 00:26:07,080 --> 00:26:08,359 Speaker 1: want to ask you about in the book, because I 529 00:26:08,359 --> 00:26:09,760 Speaker 1: had to read it three times, so I was like 530 00:26:09,760 --> 00:26:11,480 Speaker 1: oh no, I've got a gripe. Initially I was like, 531 00:26:11,520 --> 00:26:13,040 Speaker 1: I don't know about this, and then I was like, 532 00:26:13,119 --> 00:26:15,680 Speaker 1: oh no, now I think I understand it, but there's 533 00:26:16,119 --> 00:26:17,440 Speaker 1: I do have the page on here. I can't believe 534 00:26:17,440 --> 00:26:21,360 Speaker 1: I've written it down. Over time, the skill of detaching 535 00:26:21,400 --> 00:26:26,879 Speaker 1: yourself from your emotions when sharing something personal will become 536 00:26:26,920 --> 00:26:30,280 Speaker 1: a quality of strength that people will be attracted to 537 00:26:30,480 --> 00:26:34,199 Speaker 1: and find comfort in. At first, I was like, excuse me, 538 00:26:34,400 --> 00:26:36,840 Speaker 1: there is nothing wrong with like if you're sharing something. 539 00:26:36,960 --> 00:26:39,439 Speaker 1: I'm very passionate, but I'm also quite fiery. So if 540 00:26:39,480 --> 00:26:44,800 Speaker 1: I'm passionate about something and I'm either super touched or 541 00:26:44,840 --> 00:26:46,919 Speaker 1: like in a really really good way. If I'm like 542 00:26:47,080 --> 00:26:50,480 Speaker 1: super moved by something, and if I cry because I'm 543 00:26:50,480 --> 00:26:52,440 Speaker 1: so connected to that moment, I think that's a good thing. 544 00:26:52,680 --> 00:26:55,760 Speaker 1: I'm also an actor as well, so like, I lovely 545 00:26:55,760 --> 00:26:57,879 Speaker 1: if I can connect to my emotion because I'm like, 546 00:26:58,000 --> 00:27:01,520 Speaker 1: oh I'm feeling this is deep. I read this and 547 00:27:01,560 --> 00:27:04,320 Speaker 1: I was like, excuse me, I don't know that. And then, 548 00:27:04,720 --> 00:27:07,240 Speaker 1: which is why I asked you about like the reaction piece, 549 00:27:07,280 --> 00:27:09,880 Speaker 1: and I was like, I think this is what you mean. 550 00:27:09,960 --> 00:27:11,800 Speaker 1: Is it that state of like if you're living from 551 00:27:11,880 --> 00:27:14,520 Speaker 1: that like emotive space, you're going to be super reactive 552 00:27:14,560 --> 00:27:17,720 Speaker 1: and not necessarily connected to like, hang on a moment, 553 00:27:17,840 --> 00:27:20,639 Speaker 1: let me just process this for a little seci and 554 00:27:20,680 --> 00:27:23,359 Speaker 1: then I can answer like really clearly and really like 555 00:27:23,760 --> 00:27:27,360 Speaker 1: from a space where potentially more truth is there. 556 00:27:27,640 --> 00:27:31,920 Speaker 2: Yeah, totally, and yeah that's bang on. And the way 557 00:27:32,240 --> 00:27:36,600 Speaker 2: I also like to put it is you become so 558 00:27:36,680 --> 00:27:41,880 Speaker 2: the emotions aren't controlling you. Where you're controlling your emotions, 559 00:27:41,920 --> 00:27:46,639 Speaker 2: so like, absolutely be passionate, be fiery, let that emotion 560 00:27:46,760 --> 00:27:50,680 Speaker 2: come out. But it's how that comes out, right, if 561 00:27:50,680 --> 00:27:52,679 Speaker 2: it's coming from a place where you're aware of it 562 00:27:53,480 --> 00:27:56,400 Speaker 2: and you're like you're in control of that, right, and 563 00:27:56,440 --> 00:27:59,480 Speaker 2: you know that you're doing this for a very specific reason, 564 00:28:00,080 --> 00:28:02,600 Speaker 2: go because you're conveying this message or whatever you want 565 00:28:02,600 --> 00:28:04,679 Speaker 2: to get that across. Yeah, you're letting it out and 566 00:28:04,680 --> 00:28:07,840 Speaker 2: you're aware of that. Amazing. But when we get so 567 00:28:08,000 --> 00:28:12,520 Speaker 2: caught up in the emotion, when we unaware of how 568 00:28:12,600 --> 00:28:16,600 Speaker 2: much control it has over us, then that's what I 569 00:28:16,640 --> 00:28:20,120 Speaker 2: mean where it can become the big fight, that's right, 570 00:28:20,680 --> 00:28:24,840 Speaker 2: And that's when you really conspiral into your headspace as well. Yeah, 571 00:28:25,000 --> 00:28:26,720 Speaker 2: we just go down a rabbit hole and you beat 572 00:28:26,760 --> 00:28:29,560 Speaker 2: yourself up doubt and you're like, oh, you know, shame 573 00:28:29,760 --> 00:28:34,520 Speaker 2: all of that. Yeah, so yeah, totally I'm all for 574 00:28:34,720 --> 00:28:37,639 Speaker 2: emotions feeling, right, that is what meditation is all about. 575 00:28:38,400 --> 00:28:43,080 Speaker 2: But it's the difference between it controlling you and you're 576 00:28:43,080 --> 00:28:43,840 Speaker 2: controlling it. 577 00:28:43,720 --> 00:28:48,040 Speaker 1: And like an awareness. Right, well, thank you for clearing 578 00:28:48,080 --> 00:28:51,000 Speaker 1: that up to me. But I had a feeling, like 579 00:28:51,000 --> 00:28:52,880 Speaker 1: I was having lunch to my boyfriend. I was like, no, 580 00:28:52,920 --> 00:28:56,960 Speaker 1: I'm pretty sure it's all about like because yeah, and 581 00:28:57,000 --> 00:28:58,960 Speaker 1: I think as well as someone that's done like I'm 582 00:28:59,040 --> 00:29:01,520 Speaker 1: seven or eight years into therapy that I'm and it's 583 00:29:01,560 --> 00:29:05,960 Speaker 1: like hypnotherapy and we like quite hippie and woo woo. 584 00:29:06,440 --> 00:29:11,440 Speaker 1: But because I'm like super connected to myself, but also 585 00:29:11,640 --> 00:29:13,720 Speaker 1: like of course I can do the other where I'm 586 00:29:13,760 --> 00:29:18,120 Speaker 1: like totally reactive and I think, you know, especially when 587 00:29:18,400 --> 00:29:21,600 Speaker 1: we're recording this around Christmas time, a family like a 588 00:29:21,640 --> 00:29:24,880 Speaker 1: family member can say one sentence and you're like, oh, 589 00:29:25,000 --> 00:29:27,080 Speaker 1: I'm back to like being eight years old and being 590 00:29:27,120 --> 00:29:29,200 Speaker 1: pissed off, like you know what I mean. It's so funny. 591 00:29:29,280 --> 00:29:31,680 Speaker 1: It's like, but then what a gift as well to 592 00:29:31,800 --> 00:29:34,600 Speaker 1: like be hang on a sec like this, this is 593 00:29:34,760 --> 00:29:37,920 Speaker 1: this is something that I clearly haven't processed or dealt 594 00:29:37,920 --> 00:29:40,800 Speaker 1: with or whatever. It's quite empowering at the same time. 595 00:29:40,840 --> 00:29:44,760 Speaker 2: Massively, it's it's so liberating if you can have that 596 00:29:44,800 --> 00:29:49,040 Speaker 2: perspective when those triggers happen, Yeah, oh my god, it's 597 00:29:49,080 --> 00:29:50,680 Speaker 2: like a gift, right, changes your life. 598 00:29:50,760 --> 00:29:51,080 Speaker 1: Yeah. 599 00:29:51,120 --> 00:29:53,960 Speaker 2: But if you can have that level of awareness when 600 00:29:54,000 --> 00:29:57,440 Speaker 2: that trigger happens to go that's a trigger, and then 601 00:29:57,560 --> 00:30:01,040 Speaker 2: kind of go why what is that triggering? And just 602 00:30:01,120 --> 00:30:05,720 Speaker 2: have that level of awareness there, then massive then you 603 00:30:05,760 --> 00:30:07,800 Speaker 2: can process, you can deal with it, you can do 604 00:30:07,880 --> 00:30:08,560 Speaker 2: what you want with it. 605 00:30:08,760 --> 00:30:09,520 Speaker 1: Yeah, like that. 606 00:30:09,520 --> 00:30:11,840 Speaker 2: But if you don't have the awareness, then nothing's going 607 00:30:11,880 --> 00:30:13,400 Speaker 2: to happen. You're just going to let that control you, 608 00:30:13,520 --> 00:30:15,400 Speaker 2: influence you, and you're going to react, and then. 609 00:30:15,360 --> 00:30:16,880 Speaker 1: You're going to make the same the same pattern is 610 00:30:16,920 --> 00:30:18,200 Speaker 1: just going to keep unfolding, right. 611 00:30:18,160 --> 00:30:21,160 Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly, and it's actually going to compound, it's going 612 00:30:21,200 --> 00:30:23,040 Speaker 2: to make worse because you're not dealing with it. And 613 00:30:23,520 --> 00:30:26,400 Speaker 2: at some point it's either going to do one of 614 00:30:26,440 --> 00:30:28,000 Speaker 2: two things. It's either going to come out in a 615 00:30:28,000 --> 00:30:32,200 Speaker 2: way where you burn out, right, because it's like your soul, 616 00:30:32,280 --> 00:30:36,720 Speaker 2: your emotions like deal with this, or you slip into 617 00:30:37,040 --> 00:30:41,240 Speaker 2: comfortable complacency. So it's almost like where you become numb, 618 00:30:42,080 --> 00:30:44,160 Speaker 2: which is just as bad. So it's one of these 619 00:30:44,160 --> 00:30:46,840 Speaker 2: two extremes which I again to touch about this like 620 00:30:47,200 --> 00:30:50,200 Speaker 2: the whole unaware artist thing. Yeah, this disease that we're 621 00:30:50,200 --> 00:30:53,280 Speaker 2: all walking around with where either a lot of us 622 00:30:53,280 --> 00:30:58,680 Speaker 2: are either just cleaning grasping for one thing under the 623 00:30:58,760 --> 00:31:02,760 Speaker 2: next one thing under, like just completely just looking for 624 00:31:02,800 --> 00:31:07,200 Speaker 2: something yeah, never satisfied, or on the other hand, we're 625 00:31:07,240 --> 00:31:10,440 Speaker 2: just kind of almost accepted defeat that this is life 626 00:31:10,520 --> 00:31:12,479 Speaker 2: and I'm just going to go with that. And I'm like, 627 00:31:12,560 --> 00:31:14,200 Speaker 2: oh my god, it's so I. 628 00:31:14,240 --> 00:31:16,640 Speaker 1: Think that's common, Like I think it is. It's a 629 00:31:16,720 --> 00:31:19,600 Speaker 1: kind of attractive sit in that likes what we and 630 00:31:19,640 --> 00:31:22,400 Speaker 1: I use in better commas like safety, Oh, this is 631 00:31:22,400 --> 00:31:25,480 Speaker 1: what I should be doing as opposed to like the 632 00:31:25,480 --> 00:31:26,480 Speaker 1: fuck lights your heart. 633 00:31:26,360 --> 00:31:29,400 Speaker 2: On buyer, you know. And let's also like, I think 634 00:31:29,400 --> 00:31:33,520 Speaker 2: it's also important to touch on here that if you 635 00:31:34,880 --> 00:31:39,080 Speaker 2: know that you're genuinely happy in that space and completely 636 00:31:39,160 --> 00:31:41,400 Speaker 2: content or power to you, yeah, do you know what 637 00:31:41,400 --> 00:31:44,400 Speaker 2: I mean? Like, there's nothing wrong with living a normal life, 638 00:31:44,520 --> 00:31:46,480 Speaker 2: right and when I say normal, just like if you 639 00:31:46,560 --> 00:31:49,920 Speaker 2: live in the country and you got a happy family 640 00:31:50,320 --> 00:31:55,080 Speaker 2: and that just lights you up amazing. Yeah, but if 641 00:31:55,120 --> 00:31:59,560 Speaker 2: the if you're in that space and you are defeated, right, 642 00:31:59,720 --> 00:32:04,040 Speaker 2: and we've all seen that, Yeah, and I've been there 643 00:32:04,240 --> 00:32:07,480 Speaker 2: myself at different points in my life where you know 644 00:32:07,560 --> 00:32:10,800 Speaker 2: there's something more and you go, I've got to do 645 00:32:10,880 --> 00:32:15,040 Speaker 2: something here. If you don't act on that, then it's devastating. 646 00:32:15,200 --> 00:32:17,960 Speaker 1: It does take courage to do that, to like, I 647 00:32:18,000 --> 00:32:20,760 Speaker 1: think it's one thing to know, oh, like I've got 648 00:32:20,760 --> 00:32:23,320 Speaker 1: this little like inkling for it, like oh, there is 649 00:32:23,360 --> 00:32:26,560 Speaker 1: a passion or a dama or whatever in there, but 650 00:32:26,600 --> 00:32:29,160 Speaker 1: then to like have the courage to be like, I'm 651 00:32:29,160 --> 00:32:30,880 Speaker 1: going to do this thing purely because I love it. 652 00:32:30,920 --> 00:32:32,880 Speaker 1: I don't need to be attached to the outcome of 653 00:32:32,920 --> 00:32:34,440 Speaker 1: it or what that's going to look like in five 654 00:32:34,520 --> 00:32:39,200 Speaker 1: years time. It's very scary when there's a lot of 655 00:32:39,280 --> 00:32:41,320 Speaker 1: risk involved as well. 656 00:32:41,440 --> 00:32:41,880 Speaker 2: Totally. 657 00:32:41,960 --> 00:32:44,960 Speaker 1: Like, as someone that's changed careers in my mid thirties, 658 00:32:45,400 --> 00:32:48,520 Speaker 1: everyone's like, you're an actor, right, you were a nutritionist, 659 00:32:48,640 --> 00:32:50,840 Speaker 1: like you know, like you know, I've built a whole 660 00:32:50,880 --> 00:32:53,400 Speaker 1: career or doing this one thing, and I'm like yes, 661 00:32:53,520 --> 00:32:57,200 Speaker 1: I've changed careers and it's especially I've found in Australia 662 00:32:57,320 --> 00:33:00,840 Speaker 1: much harder to be accepted for make that change. But 663 00:33:00,880 --> 00:33:03,400 Speaker 1: I'm like, I know, I don't want to look fifty 664 00:33:03,480 --> 00:33:06,280 Speaker 1: years down the line and be like, what if I 665 00:33:06,320 --> 00:33:10,400 Speaker 1: honored that like little spark in my heart? And I 666 00:33:10,400 --> 00:33:12,360 Speaker 1: feel like that's kind of your whole ethos. I have 667 00:33:12,440 --> 00:33:14,560 Speaker 1: to ask you about one of my favorite things in 668 00:33:14,600 --> 00:33:18,360 Speaker 1: the book is you write about gratitude. And we've all 669 00:33:18,400 --> 00:33:20,640 Speaker 1: done that thing with that trend of like three things 670 00:33:20,640 --> 00:33:22,479 Speaker 1: are grateful for every day. We've all been there and 671 00:33:22,520 --> 00:33:25,719 Speaker 1: it's awesome, and you do it for like three weeks 672 00:33:25,760 --> 00:33:27,920 Speaker 1: and then you kind of forget or me, I kind 673 00:33:27,920 --> 00:33:29,640 Speaker 1: of forget and you know, and then a few days sleep, 674 00:33:29,680 --> 00:33:31,080 Speaker 1: and then you haven't done it for a month or two. 675 00:33:31,960 --> 00:33:35,880 Speaker 1: But I like this idea of like why and the 676 00:33:35,920 --> 00:33:40,200 Speaker 1: way you like invite us the readers to yeah, and 677 00:33:40,520 --> 00:33:43,280 Speaker 1: also like you know, if you're grateful, Like I'm grateful. 678 00:33:43,360 --> 00:33:45,720 Speaker 1: My boyfriend looked really, I mean dinner last night. Actually 679 00:33:45,800 --> 00:33:48,440 Speaker 1: I could last night, but you know, whatever, whatever it is, like, 680 00:33:48,640 --> 00:33:50,640 Speaker 1: but why am I grateful for that? Am I grateful? 681 00:33:50,680 --> 00:33:54,240 Speaker 1: Because that's his love language and it's a chance to connect, 682 00:33:54,280 --> 00:33:58,000 Speaker 1: like it's it. I had never thought about the why, 683 00:33:58,080 --> 00:33:59,320 Speaker 1: and yet it feels like the most. 684 00:33:59,200 --> 00:34:02,720 Speaker 2: Important part it totally, well, it makes it so real. Yeah, 685 00:34:02,800 --> 00:34:05,560 Speaker 2: it takes it way deeper as well, so it's not 686 00:34:05,880 --> 00:34:08,960 Speaker 2: like as you touched on. It's still great to just 687 00:34:09,040 --> 00:34:11,399 Speaker 2: even list a few things down what you're grateful for, right, 688 00:34:11,800 --> 00:34:13,919 Speaker 2: Still good to do that because it shifts the mind 689 00:34:13,960 --> 00:34:16,399 Speaker 2: in that space of gratitude, which is a beautiful place 690 00:34:16,440 --> 00:34:20,640 Speaker 2: to be. But if you ask why whatever you've written 691 00:34:20,680 --> 00:34:22,960 Speaker 2: down and you're grateful for, why am I grateful for that? 692 00:34:23,560 --> 00:34:26,160 Speaker 2: It just internalizes it and it takes it so much deeper, 693 00:34:26,280 --> 00:34:34,520 Speaker 2: so much realer, and you go, fuck, okay, well yeah that's. 694 00:34:32,680 --> 00:34:35,319 Speaker 1: A good barometer too of shit that really makes you 695 00:34:35,600 --> 00:34:39,160 Speaker 1: yeappy and the stuff you're really grateful for totally a 696 00:34:39,200 --> 00:34:43,640 Speaker 1: good way to like sift through what really like hits 697 00:34:43,640 --> 00:34:44,200 Speaker 1: you in the heart. 698 00:34:44,719 --> 00:34:48,000 Speaker 2: Yeah, and even the most basic small things. If you're 699 00:34:48,000 --> 00:34:50,120 Speaker 2: write down like oh, I'm grateful for a sun, well 700 00:34:50,120 --> 00:34:53,319 Speaker 2: why are you grateful for that? You go, why am 701 00:34:53,360 --> 00:34:57,200 Speaker 2: I grateful for that? Because like sometriss and it takes 702 00:34:57,280 --> 00:34:59,279 Speaker 2: you down this like journey where you just start really 703 00:34:59,400 --> 00:35:02,720 Speaker 2: internalized and thinking about it. Yeah, that's cool of why 704 00:35:03,520 --> 00:35:06,359 Speaker 2: you're grateful, and it's just I think it's just a 705 00:35:06,400 --> 00:35:08,880 Speaker 2: super charred way of empowering your gratitude. 706 00:35:10,239 --> 00:35:11,960 Speaker 1: I mate, I love it. I love it. I love 707 00:35:12,000 --> 00:35:15,239 Speaker 1: the way you write about purpose happiness. I've got so 708 00:35:15,280 --> 00:35:17,560 Speaker 1: many notes here, but I have to ask you because 709 00:35:17,560 --> 00:35:19,480 Speaker 1: I did. This is the thing when I deep die 710 00:35:19,520 --> 00:35:22,800 Speaker 1: of people, I like look up the most recent news articles, everything, 711 00:35:22,920 --> 00:35:24,480 Speaker 1: and you don't need answers. So if you don't want to, 712 00:35:24,560 --> 00:35:27,280 Speaker 1: can I ask a little bit about your fertility journey? 713 00:35:27,440 --> 00:35:32,839 Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, Yeah, I'm me and my wife with beautiful bread. Yeah, 714 00:35:32,880 --> 00:35:37,000 Speaker 2: beautiful Breaer. She's amazing, and we're both made a decision 715 00:35:37,040 --> 00:35:39,799 Speaker 2: to be comfortable talking about it. And I, particularly from 716 00:35:39,800 --> 00:35:41,839 Speaker 2: my perspective, from a male's point of view, I think 717 00:35:41,880 --> 00:35:45,040 Speaker 2: it's important that the message is out there. 718 00:35:45,080 --> 00:35:46,800 Speaker 1: One talks about it from males. 719 00:35:47,120 --> 00:35:47,800 Speaker 2: Yeah, totally. 720 00:35:48,200 --> 00:35:50,080 Speaker 1: Like I've watched a few interviews with you, I'm like, 721 00:35:50,200 --> 00:35:54,000 Speaker 1: holy shit. Like last year, my boyfriend and I froze 722 00:35:54,000 --> 00:35:57,960 Speaker 1: embryos right and every we saw different specialists for IVF 723 00:35:58,040 --> 00:36:00,200 Speaker 1: and every time we walked in the doctor just look 724 00:36:00,280 --> 00:36:03,239 Speaker 1: straight to him and go great swimmers, wouldn't evening, Like, 725 00:36:03,320 --> 00:36:05,560 Speaker 1: I was like, so far down the line of things 726 00:36:06,400 --> 00:36:07,960 Speaker 1: and it's just weird. And that was all that was 727 00:36:08,000 --> 00:36:10,800 Speaker 1: said to him. That is literally the only thing that 728 00:36:10,840 --> 00:36:13,239 Speaker 1: said to him. And obviously, like a girl goes through 729 00:36:13,280 --> 00:36:15,680 Speaker 1: a lot, you've got to be injecting every test under 730 00:36:15,719 --> 00:36:19,000 Speaker 1: the sun done. And I was like, when you shared, 731 00:36:19,080 --> 00:36:23,439 Speaker 1: I was like, holy shit, Like nobody shares like male 732 00:36:23,520 --> 00:36:26,839 Speaker 1: infertility stuff or I haven't I haven't seen people talk 733 00:36:26,880 --> 00:36:27,319 Speaker 1: about it. 734 00:36:27,480 --> 00:36:30,520 Speaker 2: No, Well when I when I it came up kind 735 00:36:30,520 --> 00:36:34,279 Speaker 2: of almost accidentally, which is probably not the best way 736 00:36:34,360 --> 00:36:38,400 Speaker 2: to share publicly that that news. But it was actually 737 00:36:38,440 --> 00:36:41,800 Speaker 2: after I had done the recording for the book, the 738 00:36:41,920 --> 00:36:45,480 Speaker 2: audio audible version of the book, and had a podcast 739 00:36:46,520 --> 00:36:49,000 Speaker 2: interview with Neil Mitchell directly after that. 740 00:36:49,120 --> 00:36:51,200 Speaker 1: I saw this interview, Yeah, and. 741 00:36:52,520 --> 00:36:56,160 Speaker 2: It was it was a really I was quite exhausted 742 00:36:56,200 --> 00:36:59,360 Speaker 2: then because I filter would have gone. Yeah, the filter 743 00:36:59,520 --> 00:37:02,160 Speaker 2: was gone. So like I'd done two days of recording 744 00:37:02,200 --> 00:37:05,520 Speaker 2: the book plus all everything that was going on, as 745 00:37:05,560 --> 00:37:08,879 Speaker 2: I just found out the news about the whole fertility thing, 746 00:37:09,840 --> 00:37:12,920 Speaker 2: and and he's like, oh, how you doing, I'm like, actually, 747 00:37:12,960 --> 00:37:15,320 Speaker 2: I'm pretty bargain and not so good it's been crazy 748 00:37:15,320 --> 00:37:16,719 Speaker 2: a couple of weeks and he's like, what do you mean, 749 00:37:16,719 --> 00:37:20,440 Speaker 2: And then it just kind of came out. Oh yeah, that's. 750 00:37:20,239 --> 00:37:24,200 Speaker 1: A testament to you though, like to be so, yes, 751 00:37:24,239 --> 00:37:27,879 Speaker 1: it came out by accident, but like this whole Yeah, 752 00:37:28,040 --> 00:37:30,680 Speaker 1: it is interesting the timing, Like it is this who 753 00:37:30,880 --> 00:37:33,960 Speaker 1: where you're all about like being so connected to yourself 754 00:37:35,080 --> 00:37:39,719 Speaker 1: and I just think, like, yeah, good on you for 755 00:37:39,760 --> 00:37:43,560 Speaker 1: being like like so vulnerable about something that I imagine 756 00:37:43,600 --> 00:37:45,040 Speaker 1: would be so confronting. 757 00:37:45,800 --> 00:37:48,160 Speaker 2: Yeah, it still is, like it's still was still right 758 00:37:48,160 --> 00:37:51,880 Speaker 2: in the thick of it, So look to give people contacts, 759 00:37:51,880 --> 00:37:56,879 Speaker 2: I suppose if when I probably what three weeks ago now, 760 00:37:56,880 --> 00:37:58,839 Speaker 2: so it's still fresh, Yeah, three or four weeks ago. 761 00:38:00,280 --> 00:38:03,239 Speaker 2: I just thought I'd do a sperm test. Yeah, just 762 00:38:03,560 --> 00:38:06,239 Speaker 2: because me and Brett had been trying for nearly a year. 763 00:38:07,120 --> 00:38:08,560 Speaker 2: I thought, you know, I'm just going to self refer 764 00:38:08,640 --> 00:38:11,000 Speaker 2: and just go and do it, just yeah, because I 765 00:38:11,040 --> 00:38:11,400 Speaker 2: want to know. 766 00:38:11,960 --> 00:38:13,959 Speaker 1: That's usually the year mark is when they'll start looking 767 00:38:13,960 --> 00:38:16,959 Speaker 1: at IBF as well. That's usually what doctors will say. 768 00:38:17,120 --> 00:38:20,520 Speaker 2: Yeah. So and then I got the report back and 769 00:38:20,760 --> 00:38:22,799 Speaker 2: I was like, am I reading this right? I was like, 770 00:38:23,280 --> 00:38:26,240 Speaker 2: they say nil. That means I've got like zero zero, 771 00:38:26,840 --> 00:38:29,799 Speaker 2: And I was just like, confront, I don't know if 772 00:38:29,800 --> 00:38:33,279 Speaker 2: I'm reading this report right, like and anyways as you do. 773 00:38:33,320 --> 00:38:36,399 Speaker 2: I jumped straight onto Google, oh doctor, Wikipedia, yeah right, 774 00:38:36,440 --> 00:38:39,239 Speaker 2: and I was like zero sperm count, what does that mean? 775 00:38:39,360 --> 00:38:41,120 Speaker 2: And then all these things started popping up and I'm like, 776 00:38:41,200 --> 00:38:45,400 Speaker 2: oh shit. One of them was cancer and I was 777 00:38:45,440 --> 00:38:48,520 Speaker 2: just like, okay. Well jumped in the shower that night 778 00:38:48,719 --> 00:38:51,720 Speaker 2: and was like doing the old feeling. I was like, fuck, 779 00:38:51,800 --> 00:38:55,719 Speaker 2: what is that? And like there was a lump well 780 00:38:55,800 --> 00:38:57,600 Speaker 2: would have just and I was just like, I just 781 00:38:57,640 --> 00:39:00,320 Speaker 2: went white. And I was just like, oh my god. 782 00:39:00,360 --> 00:39:05,960 Speaker 2: Because my brother in law had gone through prostate cancer 783 00:39:06,520 --> 00:39:09,040 Speaker 2: and he was young. He was only thirty five, yeah, 784 00:39:09,080 --> 00:39:12,560 Speaker 2: thirty two or thirty five, yeah around that when he 785 00:39:12,640 --> 00:39:14,800 Speaker 2: went through. And I was just like and I saw 786 00:39:14,840 --> 00:39:17,719 Speaker 2: that play out and the influence and impact that that 787 00:39:17,880 --> 00:39:20,200 Speaker 2: had on my sister and my family, and that I. 788 00:39:20,120 --> 00:39:22,520 Speaker 1: Was like, oh my god, yeah, scared? 789 00:39:22,640 --> 00:39:24,920 Speaker 2: Did God please let most so, you know, I booked 790 00:39:24,920 --> 00:39:29,960 Speaker 2: an appointment with the doctor straight away, went in there. Thankfully, 791 00:39:30,400 --> 00:39:34,600 Speaker 2: she said it's not cancer, which was great, it's assist yeah, 792 00:39:34,640 --> 00:39:37,680 Speaker 2: which is quite commonly super common. Yeah, it's it's not dangerous. 793 00:39:37,719 --> 00:39:38,839 Speaker 2: So I was just like, it. 794 00:39:38,760 --> 00:39:40,960 Speaker 1: Feels like it's a lump, right, so you still got 795 00:39:40,960 --> 00:39:42,680 Speaker 1: that initial like dread. 796 00:39:43,080 --> 00:39:46,239 Speaker 2: It was three days of torture in between finding that 797 00:39:46,320 --> 00:39:49,200 Speaker 2: and the doctor's appointment. Well it was actually probably because 798 00:39:49,239 --> 00:39:52,440 Speaker 2: the doctor was like, we don't know for sure. I'm 799 00:39:52,440 --> 00:39:54,080 Speaker 2: pretty sure it's not but you need to go get 800 00:39:54,080 --> 00:39:56,719 Speaker 2: an ultra sound like asap. So I went the next day, 801 00:39:56,719 --> 00:39:58,440 Speaker 2: and the next day when I was there, they were like, 802 00:39:58,560 --> 00:40:01,280 Speaker 2: it's assist. So that's when I found out it's not cancer. 803 00:40:01,320 --> 00:40:04,880 Speaker 1: So it was about four days four days of hell yeah. 804 00:40:05,080 --> 00:40:08,440 Speaker 2: Yeah. As far as like headspace, like like you know, 805 00:40:08,440 --> 00:40:10,400 Speaker 2: with the book and what I do and teaching all that, 806 00:40:10,440 --> 00:40:13,239 Speaker 2: it was such a test of just like okay, well 807 00:40:13,280 --> 00:40:15,600 Speaker 2: here's your curveball though like this. 808 00:40:15,600 --> 00:40:19,840 Speaker 1: You write about you right, like sit in it like 809 00:40:19,880 --> 00:40:25,720 Speaker 1: you're like welcome the like discount, which that's a pretty 810 00:40:25,400 --> 00:40:28,120 Speaker 1: yea uncomfortable and like I got a set not to 811 00:40:28,239 --> 00:40:31,120 Speaker 1: even like going through IBF. But I fought my I 812 00:40:31,120 --> 00:40:33,440 Speaker 1: did not enjoy it, like I didn't make choices out 813 00:40:33,480 --> 00:40:36,279 Speaker 1: of fear. I was like so scared the whole way through. 814 00:40:36,400 --> 00:40:37,000 Speaker 2: And it's like. 815 00:40:38,560 --> 00:40:41,400 Speaker 1: If only I had read your book and like just 816 00:40:41,440 --> 00:40:44,560 Speaker 1: a little bit more connected and so and so. Now 817 00:40:45,440 --> 00:40:48,560 Speaker 1: I think it's really empowering that you are sharing this 818 00:40:48,640 --> 00:40:53,000 Speaker 1: from like both perspectives, because I think the more that 819 00:40:53,040 --> 00:40:56,160 Speaker 1: people share their fertility journey, I just think it's so 820 00:40:56,239 --> 00:40:59,440 Speaker 1: much more empowering to know that it's not always. 821 00:40:59,239 --> 00:41:02,600 Speaker 2: Yeah or female, Like it's like yeah, yeah, yeah, Well 822 00:41:02,760 --> 00:41:04,560 Speaker 2: to be honest with this, like a long way to go, 823 00:41:04,760 --> 00:41:09,200 Speaker 2: Like even this is gonna probably annoy a few people, 824 00:41:09,200 --> 00:41:11,560 Speaker 2: but it's worth saying. Like when we went to the 825 00:41:11,560 --> 00:41:15,439 Speaker 2: IVF specialist last Tuesday, is that I was covered bog 826 00:41:15,520 --> 00:41:17,600 Speaker 2: build the male is the female? Isn't? 827 00:41:18,040 --> 00:41:18,880 Speaker 1: Yeah? 828 00:41:18,640 --> 00:41:21,800 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's opening up a whole nother ca but I'm. 829 00:41:21,680 --> 00:41:24,239 Speaker 1: Like, it's called yeah, why was that? 830 00:41:25,560 --> 00:41:27,680 Speaker 2: I didn't really dive in it. But I think it 831 00:41:27,719 --> 00:41:30,240 Speaker 2: has to do more with the carrier, which is obviously 832 00:41:30,320 --> 00:41:31,799 Speaker 2: the female. 833 00:41:31,480 --> 00:41:34,879 Speaker 1: Because we got paid. We had to pay for full price, yea, 834 00:41:35,440 --> 00:41:39,120 Speaker 1: because if you're doing it for future planning, that which 835 00:41:39,320 --> 00:41:43,160 Speaker 1: was us. So we're called socially infertile, which means you're 836 00:41:43,160 --> 00:41:46,600 Speaker 1: not infertile by like you're fertile, right, but you don't 837 00:41:46,600 --> 00:41:47,319 Speaker 1: want a kid yet? 838 00:41:47,480 --> 00:41:48,040 Speaker 2: Yeah right? 839 00:41:48,320 --> 00:41:52,120 Speaker 1: And then I think gay couples go through they're also 840 00:41:52,200 --> 00:41:56,480 Speaker 1: not covered the same as what we are. Yeah, so wild, wild, 841 00:41:56,719 --> 00:41:57,480 Speaker 1: I know, I. 842 00:41:57,440 --> 00:42:00,880 Speaker 2: Know, so not only just the fact of talking about 843 00:42:01,160 --> 00:42:04,240 Speaker 2: male fertility and all that. Yeah, there's still is double 844 00:42:04,239 --> 00:42:08,440 Speaker 2: standards and just yeah. Yeah, so I'm hoping to turn 845 00:42:08,520 --> 00:42:12,080 Speaker 2: this situation and we're still halfway through it, like yeah, 846 00:42:12,280 --> 00:42:17,160 Speaker 2: fingers crossed. It turns out, well, we're still doing the 847 00:42:17,200 --> 00:42:19,480 Speaker 2: test and we'll have a lot more information over the 848 00:42:19,480 --> 00:42:23,800 Speaker 2: coming weeks. But yeah, if I can be the person 849 00:42:23,840 --> 00:42:26,680 Speaker 2: to shine a little bit of light on that and 850 00:42:26,760 --> 00:42:29,400 Speaker 2: just give some comfortable just make people feel more comfortable 851 00:42:29,400 --> 00:42:31,000 Speaker 2: talking about it, particularly man. 852 00:42:32,040 --> 00:42:35,160 Speaker 1: Almost all connect you as well to an amazing and 853 00:42:35,280 --> 00:42:39,400 Speaker 1: evading fertility guy here. Really awesome because you're into a 854 00:42:39,719 --> 00:42:41,560 Speaker 1: probably a bit of a evator. I imagine like a 855 00:42:41,560 --> 00:42:44,640 Speaker 1: bit of that traditional I'm all about, like go to 856 00:42:44,680 --> 00:42:47,040 Speaker 1: the like get all that. I think, take a little 857 00:42:47,040 --> 00:42:47,760 Speaker 1: bit from everywhere. 858 00:42:47,840 --> 00:42:49,360 Speaker 2: That's yeah, I'm very much the same. 859 00:42:49,280 --> 00:42:50,839 Speaker 1: You know, I like, take a bit of this from 860 00:42:50,920 --> 00:42:53,959 Speaker 1: Eastern philosophy, take a little bit this Western medicine. And 861 00:42:54,600 --> 00:42:57,360 Speaker 1: I really appreciate you sharing that because I know it 862 00:42:57,400 --> 00:42:59,839 Speaker 1: would be a little bit confronting especially now because you're 863 00:42:59,840 --> 00:43:02,799 Speaker 1: still in the think of it. But like as soon 864 00:43:02,840 --> 00:43:05,439 Speaker 1: as I saw it, like even I felt like seen, 865 00:43:05,719 --> 00:43:08,320 Speaker 1: I know that sounds really weird, and like so I 866 00:43:09,000 --> 00:43:12,680 Speaker 1: appreciate you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I think like 867 00:43:14,080 --> 00:43:16,200 Speaker 1: we get caught up in this idea of what normal 868 00:43:16,280 --> 00:43:19,400 Speaker 1: needs to look like as well, Oh my. 869 00:43:19,239 --> 00:43:21,400 Speaker 2: God, I I shouldn't I hate normal, but. 870 00:43:22,000 --> 00:43:24,480 Speaker 1: Yeah, Like, and I just I think it's different for everyone. 871 00:43:24,760 --> 00:43:27,960 Speaker 1: It is everyone's journey to getting to where they want 872 00:43:27,960 --> 00:43:30,560 Speaker 1: to go is and I think that's what this book 873 00:43:30,600 --> 00:43:34,000 Speaker 1: is also a celebration of of just like I feel 874 00:43:34,000 --> 00:43:36,919 Speaker 1: like you're like, yo, this thing worked for me, right, 875 00:43:37,120 --> 00:43:39,480 Speaker 1: And like I'm going to not sugarcoat it. I'm going 876 00:43:39,560 --> 00:43:41,799 Speaker 1: to tell you if you and I like the way 877 00:43:41,840 --> 00:43:46,000 Speaker 1: that you're just like yeah, you're kind of like mah manifestation, 878 00:43:46,920 --> 00:43:50,800 Speaker 1: Like you know, like I like that you're like pretty 879 00:43:50,800 --> 00:43:52,640 Speaker 1: straight down the line. And I think that if that's 880 00:43:52,680 --> 00:43:55,320 Speaker 1: the way you choose to live, whether it's the promo 881 00:43:55,400 --> 00:43:57,719 Speaker 1: of this book or whether it's a TV show or 882 00:43:57,719 --> 00:44:01,239 Speaker 1: a pod, down the line, Like I don't think it 883 00:44:01,400 --> 00:44:03,120 Speaker 1: to me, it's your fail safe. Like I don't think 884 00:44:03,120 --> 00:44:04,880 Speaker 1: you can go wrong by just being like real and 885 00:44:04,880 --> 00:44:11,400 Speaker 1: doing what you're doing. And I freaking loved the book 886 00:44:11,480 --> 00:44:13,040 Speaker 1: so so much, I'm gonna ask you one more book 887 00:44:13,120 --> 00:44:15,440 Speaker 1: question just because I have enjoyed it so much. I'm 888 00:44:15,440 --> 00:44:18,120 Speaker 1: about to go over time. I love the way. There's 889 00:44:18,160 --> 00:44:24,120 Speaker 1: a whole chapter and I think it's just called get Curious. 890 00:44:24,120 --> 00:44:27,000 Speaker 1: My favorite bit about that chapter is you basically go 891 00:44:27,719 --> 00:44:30,719 Speaker 1: just get curious about everything. Yeah, and you give this 892 00:44:30,840 --> 00:44:32,880 Speaker 1: really cool little tip when you leave your house in 893 00:44:32,920 --> 00:44:36,040 Speaker 1: the morning, treat it like you're on holiday, and like 894 00:44:36,120 --> 00:44:39,000 Speaker 1: you'll discover these new like a flower that was there 895 00:44:39,040 --> 00:44:42,280 Speaker 1: yesterday that wasn't there today, or like what a beautiful 896 00:44:42,280 --> 00:44:43,120 Speaker 1: way to live life? 897 00:44:43,280 --> 00:44:47,840 Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, it is. It's a simple thing, but it 898 00:44:47,880 --> 00:44:52,480 Speaker 2: can really bring in so much awareness and just like 899 00:44:53,080 --> 00:44:58,520 Speaker 2: excitement and wonder to your day to day. Yeah, because 900 00:44:58,680 --> 00:45:02,239 Speaker 2: you think about that's what happens when you travel somewhere, Right, 901 00:45:02,360 --> 00:45:05,600 Speaker 2: if you go to a foreign place, you go to sea, somewhere, 902 00:45:06,520 --> 00:45:10,560 Speaker 2: you're so connected to the moment. You're in the present moment. 903 00:45:10,600 --> 00:45:12,040 Speaker 2: You're looking at everything morning. 904 00:45:12,239 --> 00:45:13,400 Speaker 1: Yeah, right, You're. 905 00:45:13,239 --> 00:45:16,600 Speaker 2: Like looking at staff that the locals just walk straight past. Right, 906 00:45:16,640 --> 00:45:19,839 Speaker 2: You're looking at a statue. You're going, wow, check that out. 907 00:45:20,360 --> 00:45:22,920 Speaker 2: And all the locals are walking past because they just 908 00:45:23,040 --> 00:45:25,279 Speaker 2: see it every day, so they don't appreciate it, right, 909 00:45:26,239 --> 00:45:29,839 Speaker 2: And it's bringing that sense of wonder, that sense of 910 00:45:29,920 --> 00:45:35,000 Speaker 2: like curiosity into your day to day. And it's a yeah, 911 00:45:35,280 --> 00:45:39,240 Speaker 2: like treat when you walk outside, leave the door each morning, 912 00:45:39,360 --> 00:45:42,839 Speaker 2: like you're stepping into like a foreign land, like it's 913 00:45:42,920 --> 00:45:45,000 Speaker 2: a new place that you've never been to before, and 914 00:45:45,680 --> 00:45:49,759 Speaker 2: just look around and you'll be amazed at what you'll 915 00:45:49,800 --> 00:45:53,400 Speaker 2: find just in your neighborhood. Like it's it's crazy if 916 00:45:53,440 --> 00:45:55,840 Speaker 2: you just go looking for it and be curious. 917 00:45:55,840 --> 00:45:58,080 Speaker 1: So I love it. And that's my trick I use 918 00:45:58,120 --> 00:46:02,319 Speaker 1: if I'm ever nervous. In an addition, and so the tea, 919 00:46:02,719 --> 00:46:05,040 Speaker 1: an acting teacher taught me this. She was like, if 920 00:46:05,080 --> 00:46:07,000 Speaker 1: you're nervous and you're like caught in your head and 921 00:46:07,040 --> 00:46:08,600 Speaker 1: you're like, oh fuck if I got my lines down, 922 00:46:08,640 --> 00:46:10,319 Speaker 1: Oh fuck, do I look okay, I'll fuck with's that 923 00:46:10,360 --> 00:46:13,200 Speaker 1: camera like and you can kind of like quickly spirals 924 00:46:13,239 --> 00:46:17,160 Speaker 1: like just focus on your like readers, So the person 925 00:46:17,160 --> 00:46:20,080 Speaker 1: that's reading the other charage sign's eyes and just get 926 00:46:20,120 --> 00:46:21,919 Speaker 1: really curious about their eyes and it just straight away 927 00:46:21,920 --> 00:46:24,560 Speaker 1: pulls out of your head. That's one because you're in 928 00:46:24,600 --> 00:46:26,200 Speaker 1: a state of curiosity and you're like, oh, they're kind 929 00:46:26,200 --> 00:46:28,520 Speaker 1: of like yours are kind of like finished, like you've 930 00:46:28,520 --> 00:46:29,719 Speaker 1: got a bit of a vibe going on with your 931 00:46:30,040 --> 00:46:32,560 Speaker 1: and it's like it straight away from me, Like it's 932 00:46:32,600 --> 00:46:35,000 Speaker 1: such a trick that like it gets me out of 933 00:46:35,000 --> 00:46:37,000 Speaker 1: here and it just gets me into like one connecting 934 00:46:37,040 --> 00:46:39,439 Speaker 1: with whoever the other human is. But it's a fun 935 00:46:39,480 --> 00:46:41,640 Speaker 1: way to do it with like so many elements of 936 00:46:41,680 --> 00:46:43,960 Speaker 1: your life and even the way you talk about like 937 00:46:44,040 --> 00:46:49,960 Speaker 1: hang around unlike people, if you're curious, you're going to learn, yes, 938 00:46:50,000 --> 00:46:52,080 Speaker 1: the stuff that you don't gel with them on, but 939 00:46:52,160 --> 00:46:54,000 Speaker 1: there's always going to be some kind of little gift 940 00:46:54,040 --> 00:46:56,000 Speaker 1: in there or some kind of little gem that you're 941 00:46:56,080 --> 00:46:58,800 Speaker 1: there to anyway, Like I said, I could talk to 942 00:46:58,800 --> 00:46:59,279 Speaker 1: you all day long. 943 00:46:59,320 --> 00:47:06,400 Speaker 2: No, it's it's it's like a mini meditation. That's what 944 00:47:06,440 --> 00:47:09,080 Speaker 2: you're doing. Yeah, is you're pulling the mind out of 945 00:47:09,080 --> 00:47:13,000 Speaker 2: its thinking mode. And I call it the neutral gear, yah, 946 00:47:13,080 --> 00:47:16,680 Speaker 2: which is this place where everything's still running, like the 947 00:47:16,719 --> 00:47:20,680 Speaker 2: engine's operating, but you're not driving and you're revving out 948 00:47:20,680 --> 00:47:23,760 Speaker 2: the motor. Yeah, you're just taking everything that's around you 949 00:47:23,920 --> 00:47:25,799 Speaker 2: right a moment, right. 950 00:47:25,600 --> 00:47:28,440 Speaker 1: So baby reset almost. 951 00:47:28,239 --> 00:47:31,520 Speaker 2: Yeah, little baby recent, little connection moment, little just breather, 952 00:47:31,760 --> 00:47:35,040 Speaker 2: it's just like and whatever it is, yeah it could be. 953 00:47:35,120 --> 00:47:38,359 Speaker 2: That's a great example, and it also has so many 954 00:47:38,360 --> 00:47:44,200 Speaker 2: wonderful buy effects, like it decreases your anxiety. It snaps 955 00:47:44,200 --> 00:47:46,080 Speaker 2: you out of that all the worry that you were 956 00:47:46,560 --> 00:47:49,200 Speaker 2: in your head, and it pulls you into that moment 957 00:47:49,239 --> 00:47:51,239 Speaker 2: of just like, oh that's interesting the color in their 958 00:47:51,280 --> 00:47:55,040 Speaker 2: eyes or like the smell, and all of a sudden, 959 00:47:55,239 --> 00:47:57,440 Speaker 2: all of that stuff that you were worrying about in 960 00:47:57,440 --> 00:47:58,719 Speaker 2: your head. 961 00:47:58,280 --> 00:47:59,960 Speaker 1: Gone in an instant. 962 00:48:00,160 --> 00:48:02,880 Speaker 2: Yeah. Now it'll probably come back, like as soon as 963 00:48:02,920 --> 00:48:05,520 Speaker 2: you stop connecting or looking at that thing. But just 964 00:48:05,520 --> 00:48:08,960 Speaker 2: for that moment, it's just giving yourself Ah, brought you 965 00:48:09,000 --> 00:48:13,160 Speaker 2: down a bit reset and then you know it's put 966 00:48:13,200 --> 00:48:15,920 Speaker 2: yourself in a better state of mind to then go 967 00:48:16,000 --> 00:48:18,319 Speaker 2: about whatever you need to get done after that. 968 00:48:18,640 --> 00:48:20,520 Speaker 1: How good curiosity for the win? 969 00:48:20,840 --> 00:48:22,400 Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, big fan. 970 00:48:23,040 --> 00:48:25,000 Speaker 1: Luke MacLeod, thank you so much for jumping on the 971 00:48:25,000 --> 00:48:27,840 Speaker 1: pod today. Thanks for having book is unreal. I'm going 972 00:48:27,880 --> 00:48:30,840 Speaker 1: to get you to sign this copy for me, Champion, 973 00:48:31,440 --> 00:48:32,960 Speaker 1: and I can't wait to have you. 974 00:48:32,920 --> 00:48:35,520 Speaker 2: Back on the pod one don't wait to come back. 975 00:48:35,760 --> 00:48:40,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, can you always welcome mate. Oh that's a wrap 976 00:48:40,680 --> 00:48:46,040 Speaker 1: on another episode of Fearlessly Failing. As always, thank you 977 00:48:46,080 --> 00:48:50,000 Speaker 1: to our guests and let's continue the conversation on Instagram. 978 00:48:50,560 --> 00:48:55,719 Speaker 1: I'm at Yamo Lollaberry. This potty my word for podcast 979 00:48:56,239 --> 00:49:00,160 Speaker 1: is available on all streaming platforms. I'd love it. You 980 00:49:00,239 --> 00:49:04,399 Speaker 1: could subscribe, rape and comment and of course spread the love.