Speaker 1: Tuto, Flex and Frooms, the Flex and Frooms catch up
Speaker 1: podcast Lex and Rooms.
Speaker 2: It is flexing Frooms on CATA. Another day another dollar. Look,
Speaker 2: Froom and I combined have so many thoughts about the world,
Speaker 2: and yet we didn't feel like authorities to share those thoughts.
Speaker 2: That's changed. That has changed. Social media a place of
Speaker 2: contention to many ruthless and reckless banshees operating in a
Speaker 2: way that's not conducive to us having good time. So
Speaker 2: what we decided is to make a Social Media Act.
Speaker 1: This is legal redacted. This is quintessential because decorum is
Speaker 1: no longer a thing of the present. It's a thing
Speaker 1: of the past. But we are ready to change that.
Speaker 1: Welcome to the Flex and Firms Social Media Act. This
Speaker 1: is Flex and Frooms on CATA. Welcome back to Flex
Speaker 1: and Frooms. Our first installment of a very important government
Speaker 1: based segment. It is Flex and Firms Social Media Act. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we really say, a.
Speaker 2: New bill looking to be past late twenty twenty three,
Speaker 2: early twenty twenty four. We're working on it.
Speaker 1: Forget Dutch. We're gonna learn legalies. Very important. Today's rules
Speaker 1: are rules from following. What is your first rule of
Speaker 1: the unfollowed flex mummy.
Speaker 2: When it comes to one following someone, if in that
Speaker 2: moment your unfollowed will cause more harm to the person
Speaker 2: than is warranted, keep followed. I like that, And what
Speaker 2: I mean by that is some people just take it
Speaker 2: really really poorly, and it's just like to me, it's flippant.
Speaker 2: I could follow and unfollow anyone, the uber driver, you know,
Speaker 2: the person at the bar, that girl I met once,
Speaker 2: and I could unfollow you just as quick. It's all good.
Speaker 2: But if you're a close friend with bad content, you
Speaker 2: gotta stay followed.
Speaker 1: If you've slept with someone, okay, if you've laid pipe,
Speaker 1: If you've if you've laid pipe once and you're not
Speaker 1: going to see each other again, unfollow totally warranted.
Speaker 2: And that is not about the race of like to follower.
Speaker 2: That's putting someone back in their place. You were invited
Speaker 2: into the inner sanctum segurtively literally, now you're part of
Speaker 2: gen pop gen pop general population. The prison system is
Speaker 2: my body ready? Yep?
Speaker 1: Another one?
Speaker 2: Okay. If you do the unfollow, follow as like a
Speaker 2: manipulative scare tactic to get someone to notice you seek
Speaker 2: help and uh, because I know you're out there. I
Speaker 2: know you're out there. I know you're out there.
Speaker 1: Follow and follow, follow, follow. I think you need to
Speaker 1: be really mindful of what your following list looks like.
Speaker 1: Now I haven't done this before, but I know some
Speaker 1: people that when they first start dating someone, look through
Speaker 1: the whole follow list. Okay, have you ever done that?
Speaker 1: Has anyone done that? You've done much for you? Bob
Speaker 1: might look through all the follow I'm looking through all
Speaker 1: the women legend.
Speaker 2: Why don't we Why don't we read between the lines? You?
Speaker 2: Why don't we? Why don't we pull out what's really
Speaker 2: being said here? There might be a little situation. You know,
Speaker 2: you've somehow managed to jump into the social media profile
Speaker 2: of the person that you're interested in. You know, maybe
Speaker 2: I don't post enfe so like you've gone through all
Speaker 2: the feed posts, You've gone through all the tagged posts,
Speaker 2: and what's left for you to do but go through
Speaker 2: their following Okay, you start looking through. Maybe you see
Speaker 2: a few complex magazine, that's fine, you might see it
Speaker 2: Lost Hunting, Yeah, little Woolworths, Little lad Bible, little Fine.
Speaker 2: And then there are a few ones. Now you might
Speaker 2: start seeing a bunch of people who look just like you,
Speaker 2: and you might say I'm in good hands, or you
Speaker 2: might start seeing some like MRA men's rights activist content
Speaker 2: you say, oh, it could just be an accident. Could
Speaker 2: just be an accidentoke. You know what I will say
Speaker 2: is I follow like almost four thousand people. I've been
Speaker 2: on Instagram for like ten years. I'm not cleaning that out.
Speaker 2: One time I tried, I downloaded an app that cleans
Speaker 2: out anyone who you haven't interacted with or they haven't
Speaker 2: interacted with you in the last I don't know two
Speaker 2: months or three months, and it unfollowed so many people
Speaker 2: that I knew in real life in a day to
Speaker 2: day that they were messaging me or messaging my friends
Speaker 2: and being like, what's flex this problem with me? Like?
Speaker 2: Have I done something wrong? It was just too hard,
Speaker 2: so I guess everyone says anything else. Well.
Speaker 1: You also never know when someone's gonna come back in
Speaker 1: your life. Eg. If you follow people from school or
Speaker 1: from your first job, you never know when they could
Speaker 1: come in handy keep.
Speaker 2: People followed so you can use them to your advantage.
Speaker 1: Keeter Flex and Frooms Flex and Firms.
Speaker 2: Today, we're talking about the age old scenario. If you're
Speaker 2: taking photos of your friends. Do you need their consent
Speaker 2: to post it?
Speaker 1: Go? This is a case by case scenario. If your
Speaker 1: friend has body image issues or I'm gonna take it there, Okay,
Speaker 1: okay it no, I will say before you post an
Speaker 1: image of your friend, Yeah, you need to assess are
Speaker 1: they someone that's gonna get their back up? Because there's
Speaker 1: nothing worse than posting some pictures as part of a
Speaker 1: long story and someone wants to delete it.
Speaker 2: It's like, Babes, your particular still was image twenty five
Speaker 2: of a fifty two slide story. If I take out
Speaker 2: twenty five, the flow is not there, the story is
Speaker 2: not story. I understand what you're saying. I even commend
Speaker 2: you for that stretch. But what I hate about interacting
Speaker 2: with someone's issues from the perimeter is that you either
Speaker 2: like fall into the cycle when it's not helpful. Like
Speaker 2: do you think I look good? Do I look bad?
Speaker 2: Is that a good one? Can we take in a
Speaker 2: different wa it's what you look like. I captured you
Speaker 2: as you are, so I don't want to I don't
Speaker 2: want to confuse us about what we're looking at. That
Speaker 2: is you? Okay? Another rule when the phone comes out,
Speaker 2: especially as a documentarian, you know the score. You know
Speaker 2: what's going on, So you have three seconds to opt out.
Speaker 2: You already know what's happening. When Flex in particular gets
Speaker 2: out the phone. I'm assuming informed consent based on our
Speaker 2: previous history, and you know what it is. If you're
Speaker 2: like and you say it all the time, don't put
Speaker 2: that up.
Speaker 1: Yeah no, put it up.
Speaker 2: I'm like, okay, cool. If anything you like, put that up,
Speaker 2: tag me it's going up, and I understand. But like,
Speaker 2: you know what the score is when the phone comes out,
Speaker 2: I'm so sorry. I'm not doing embargoed pickies waiting for
Speaker 2: your approval for release. I'm not playing.
Speaker 1: I will say, when you took a video of me
Speaker 1: trying to excavate the gunk from my belly button the
Speaker 1: other day and threatened to post it, that was really
Speaker 1: that's a wake up call.
Speaker 2: It was a wake up call. And so that I say,
Speaker 2: be more mindful of the way that you show up
Speaker 2: in physical spaces, because there's always cameras watching in this
Speaker 2: room alone one, two, three, four, five, six, seven.
Speaker 1: Eight, nine, eight, ten, eleven, twelve, this twelve cameras.
Speaker 2: And on the monitors too. It's not safe.
Speaker 1: I will say, I personally am quite a liberal person
Speaker 1: when it comes to getting naked and being silly. I
Speaker 1: know you wouldn't see it because I don't post about it. However,
Speaker 1: the other day of my birthday, a friend posted a
Speaker 1: picture of our bare asses. Might I say the ass
Speaker 1: was looking small, but it was giving, was sitting. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's that definitely a good photo. And yeah I thought this.
Speaker 1: You know people shouldn't geting this for free. Yeah, so that's.
Speaker 2: When you started the only fans put a paywall up,
Speaker 2: got your bag.
Speaker 1: I commend exactly so I say, if it's too suggestive
Speaker 1: of your friends, such as if their breasts are looking
Speaker 1: quite juice or the bottom is giving, then perhaps consider
Speaker 1: asking first.
Speaker 2: I want to say that's common sense, just like not
Speaker 2: put it up. That one goes in the group chat
Speaker 2: and you say, great memories, save archive, enjoy. I will say,
Speaker 2: as a standard, if we can end on a high note,
Speaker 2: out or the silence I'm going to assume is a
Speaker 2: green light doesn't work in every context. Don't get it twisted,
Speaker 2: your sick goos, but opt out or you're opted in.
Speaker 2: There you go.
Speaker 1: This is the social media act. It's a hammer ajourn agent.
Speaker 1: You're listening to flex and frooms on CADA.
Speaker 2: Today we're discussing over indulgent birthday posts.
Speaker 1: Personally, I armed an ard on my birthday this year.
Speaker 1: About a month ago, there was a few texts back
Speaker 1: and forth to numerous friends saying, is this photo of
Speaker 1: me princess a little too much to post? And you
Speaker 1: know what I was came back to bite me. Someone said,
Speaker 1: I can't stop looking at those ears?
Speaker 2: Is this in reference to my large ears?
Speaker 1: Apparently got large ears? Let me have a look. See
Speaker 1: you hesitated? Do I I have large ears?
Speaker 2: Do you know what? Let's just do a quick comparison.
Speaker 2: I actually have quite petite ears. You see them from
Speaker 2: the front. You can definitely see yours.
Speaker 1: Honey. If you whoa, it's a e. They just look
Speaker 1: like a little macaroni the smallest.
Speaker 2: Say, I can't stop looking at those ears. I didn't
Speaker 2: think your is abnormal. Literally, I mean, don't do it
Speaker 2: like that. Please give yourself.
Speaker 1: I mean they're not they're not the smallest ears.
Speaker 2: When we see the photo. Yeah, yeah, I think the
Speaker 2: photo in question will help you know.
Speaker 1: If you put a photo of yourself as a baby,
Speaker 1: it's you cute as you've ever looked.
Speaker 2: This is is it weird of your friend to like
Speaker 2: bring you back down to earth.
Speaker 1: My friend, it was random.
Speaker 2: What this is worse?
Speaker 1: Are you already? Are you ready? So?
Speaker 2: I can't get enough of those.
Speaker 1: That's just a regular she's giving me ear dysmorphia.
Speaker 2: So this is a full blown stranger commenting about your
Speaker 2: eide didn't retrospective like dysmorphia, like you didn't. You weren't
Speaker 2: insecure about it then, but currently it's something you should
Speaker 2: bring up.
Speaker 1: It's like when I posted a photo of me in
Speaker 1: primary school and someone said have a massive head, Like,
Speaker 1: don't make me get that photo up as well. The
Speaker 1: head is looking large, but I looks cute.
Speaker 2: What kind of environment have you cultivated with? People are
Speaker 2: just saying these things to you?
Speaker 1: I don't know, man, I don't like though.
Speaker 2: Let me victim blaming the over indulgent birthday post definitely
Speaker 2: something that twas in my repertoire as an early twenty
Speaker 2: year old. I was that person who was like, it's
Speaker 2: my birthday month, it's all about me. Then life kind
Speaker 2: of humbles you and you realize it's a regular day
Speaker 2: for everyone else and nobody actually cares. And so it's
Speaker 2: currently not in my repertoire. I'll do like the classic,
Speaker 2: like you know, the single feed it's my birthday might
Speaker 2: reference on the story, but I have the belief that
Speaker 2: if you don't celebrate yourself, who will. So if you
Speaker 2: feel it in your core, definitely do it.
Speaker 1: I also say I never think h someone posts about
Speaker 1: their birthday like I always like it. I like to
Speaker 1: see people reflect. I like to remember that we are
Speaker 1: mortal on this earth and time is a chicken.
Speaker 2: If you will, I will say I would much rather
Speaker 2: someone's self curate their over indulgent birthday posts and stories
Speaker 2: and have the expectation that all their friends will so
Speaker 2: they add to story I don't like personally, I'm not
Speaker 2: a big fan of I'm on your feed, it's your birthday,
Speaker 2: and every single story you've posted it is just a
Speaker 2: reh share, a reshare, a reshare. It's looking messy visually,
Speaker 2: not an enjoyable experience. It's a no for me.
Speaker 1: Definitely was guilty of that. But it's hard because if
Speaker 1: you get a lot of if you get a lot
Speaker 1: of story mentions, the next year is a big bit
Speaker 1: to follow up.
Speaker 2: Folks. It kind of reminds me of on Facebook, you know,
Speaker 2: like you get into the habit of like being like
Speaker 2: the value of my birthday is defined by how many
Speaker 2: posts on my wall. And then you graduate from Facebook
Speaker 2: and you say, all my value is defined by how
Speaker 2: many text messages I got saying happy birthday. I'm not
Speaker 2: responding to those anyway.
Speaker 1: It's all good.
Speaker 2: It's all good. It's a lot any other thoughts.
Speaker 1: I've said all I need to say. But I do
Speaker 1: want to say. If you're the person said I had big.
Speaker 2: Ears, Everyone's like, whoa, it's like casting a shadow.
Speaker 1: Over us, like huge, laying my ears out of it?
Speaker 2: Okay for somebody who's made a lot of statements about
Speaker 2: not wanting their body to be spoken about. People keep
Speaker 2: speaking about.
Speaker 1: Your body about me? What about keep going I'm having it?
Speaker 2: Isn't there.
Speaker 3: I've had enough my ears. Can't you see? I want
Speaker 3: to live, but you want bitching? Oh you won't stop
Speaker 3: talking about my ears?
Speaker 1: What about me?
Speaker 2: Wrap it up?
Speaker 1: King fru meno through me boommmy like smile. You're listening
Speaker 1: to Flex and Frooms on Kaita today.
Speaker 2: We're talking about following friends. The question do you have
Speaker 2: to follow your friends? No? But I don't see why
Speaker 2: you wouldn't, right, a follow is such a baseless metric.
Speaker 2: It's a button. Chances are, the way Zuckerberg set it up,
Speaker 2: they're not gonna see their stuff anyway.
Speaker 1: Facts.
Speaker 2: So realistically, the only reason why you'd be funny about
Speaker 2: following a friend is if you're funny about keeping that
Speaker 2: light follower ratio, to which I say, you're weird, especially
Speaker 2: if you're concerned about the ratio and you don't get
Speaker 2: paid to be on the internet.
Speaker 1: Extra layer of weird.
Speaker 2: What's wrong with you?
Speaker 1: It's insecurity and I totally understand. Explain it well, social
Speaker 1: media is life and oh sorry, yeah, I did hear that. Okay,
Speaker 1: my gut, my gut saying follow your friends, because.
Speaker 2: What's the insecurity bit?
Speaker 1: Like people don't want to people some people are funny about,
Speaker 1: like following more people than follow them.
Speaker 2: Reason, what are the reasons?
Speaker 1: King, bullying, ha past trauma, insecurity, class a class insecurity,
Speaker 1: status insecurity, keeping up with the Joneses? Just a plethora,
Speaker 1: a plethora of issues. I will say, if you don't
Speaker 1: like your friend's posts, continue to follow them, but mute
Speaker 1: them because keeping the peace is better than politics.
Speaker 2: This is keeping the peace is better than politics.
Speaker 1: Do you want to elaborate swiss on them, just like
Speaker 1: I know what people think, like I feel like I
Speaker 1: know what you're gonna say about Hell. I know you're
Speaker 1: gonna love that one. You're like, friendship is more important
Speaker 1: than likes. This savement's hard.
Speaker 2: Listen, my mate, I want to listen to Look, I
Speaker 2: don't understand what you're saying. I'm gonna be gonna be real,
Speaker 2: but I will meet you as if I do, okay
Speaker 2: and say that you should follow your friends, because the
Speaker 2: whole impetus, the whole reason why social media exists is
Speaker 2: so you can have another avenue to connect with your community.
Speaker 2: So if you're not using it to follow your friends
Speaker 2: and to build connections, then like, what are you using
Speaker 2: it for? See riddle me that flex And now let's
Speaker 2: go through the rules of what you need to do
Speaker 2: when you have a falling out with a friend. Ouch
Speaker 2: Number one, play falling.
Speaker 1: Out with friends. Really nothing quite hits like that is
Speaker 1: what it is, first and foremost. It's a very obvious one.
Speaker 2: Three two one Mute.
Speaker 1: I know what you're thinking. I want to unfollow straight away,
Speaker 1: just to dig the knife in and twist it around.
Speaker 1: But let's be real. Friendships come in seasons and someone
Speaker 1: could be right around the corner, and you know what
Speaker 1: I don't want to do in summer, have to go
Speaker 1: back in and do the follow.
Speaker 2: It's never worth it. I've been through maybe two or
Speaker 2: three friendship like not break ups with like year periods
Speaker 2: or actual romantic relationship breakups where you do the unfollow
Speaker 2: as a statement. It's very clear statement. Right. It's saying
Speaker 2: I'm cutting you out of my life virtually, emotionally, physically, spiritually.
Speaker 2: And what you tend to forget is that there's a
Speaker 2: part of you. I would say somewhere here in the
Speaker 2: chest that's no. And you need to start making decisions
Speaker 2: for future you, because future you want to check back.
Speaker 2: I'm not saying hate squirrel. I'm not saying that, but
Speaker 2: I just feel like sometimes you close the gate on
Speaker 2: yourself and edsaly that gate slightly ajar for future entry.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but not in a toxic way. Oh, obvi, OBV.
Speaker 1: I will say I believe everything. Actually no, I don't.
Speaker 1: I would likely believe everything. I'd like to believe that
Speaker 1: things can be mended. If both hearts are willing, you
Speaker 1: can get over anything. Don't know if I believe it,
Speaker 1: but let's put it out there. So what I would
Speaker 1: do if you're ready to re engage is start very
Speaker 1: small and go in knowing that they do not have
Speaker 1: to engage, So go in with no expectations. Start with
Speaker 1: the likes.
Speaker 2: O you want to start repairing the relationship, Okay, you
Speaker 2: have to repair without your ego. You think you've got
Speaker 2: to repair from social first. That feels like insane behavior.
Speaker 2: If you had a friendship falling out, don't send me alike.
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 1: I think sometimes you really need to wade into the
Speaker 1: waters very slowly. It's one approach. But if you're going
Speaker 1: to do that approach, go with out prejudice. Start with
Speaker 1: the likes. Start with a little watch on the story.
Speaker 1: I think the watch is a real hard one. I've
Speaker 1: gone off the watches on. You know, when it's in
Speaker 1: tricky times, in trying times.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna have to disagree. And I hate to do
Speaker 2: this because we should be a united front. Kay to
Speaker 2: give me the hand. When you've first done the friendship breakdown,
Speaker 2: like when it's fresh enough that you're like, I can't
Speaker 2: even see this person on the internet. Please do not
Speaker 2: get into the trap of continuing to dole out likes.
Speaker 2: And comments like things are good to throw others off
Speaker 2: the scent. I've had a few situations where I'm like, hmmm,
Speaker 2: I don't want to make it obvious that I'm not
Speaker 2: friends with this person anymore, so I'll keep on participating
Speaker 2: in and engaging in their content so people don't know.
Speaker 2: It doesn't work. There are real detectives on the internet,
Speaker 2: like they can see through the illusion of you faking
Speaker 2: a comment being like, hey baby, look amazing. Enough of that. Also,
Speaker 2: you confuse yourself because you're like, am I the fake
Speaker 2: one in this situation? Because I'm the one with a
Speaker 2: problem and I'm trying to signal that I don't have
Speaker 2: a problem.
Speaker 1: And for who Yeah, you're listening to flex and Frooms
Speaker 1: on kit We are talking about how to correctly slide
Speaker 1: into a DM. This is a very important art. It's
Speaker 1: a lifestyle and not everyone's cut out for it, but
Speaker 1: we are here to help you out and tell you
Speaker 1: how to do it correctly. I have my first rule, please,
Speaker 1: which is you started following someone there's a vibe, perhaps
Speaker 1: you slept together, or perhaps you've just met. Would never
Speaker 1: be bused. We start following each other something that I
Speaker 1: think you shouldn't do is shift your stories to impress
Speaker 1: them in the hope that they will DM slide. We've
Speaker 1: all been.
Speaker 2: So was that a content adjustment? A content adjustment on
Speaker 2: ale of three? No?
Speaker 1: No, I start, I you know, I have a dalliance
Speaker 1: with an intellectual man?
Speaker 2: No Socrates? What is an identity? Goose? You would I
Speaker 2: start starts asking me for books? How would you read?
Speaker 2: Just generally?
Speaker 1: I just like Rea, share your philosophical things, but like
Speaker 1: wide out your name and zoom in a little bit.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's one of my anti rules. How does one
Speaker 2: avoid doing that?
Speaker 1: Just say true to yourself, be like.
Speaker 2: You're scaring everyone for me, don't say that.
Speaker 1: But it's like, there have been times in my life
Speaker 1: where like I'm a real trick style on the Yeah,
Speaker 1: you're a goofy girl, and I'm out here being respectable.
Speaker 1: Try not to be too ugly.
Speaker 2: Can we get a timeline of when you've done this?
Speaker 1: Or twenty nineteen? I was a big about that life.
Speaker 1: Oh fee too many respectable people in the DMS, and
Speaker 1: I thought I'm twenty five. Sorry, I was twenty two,
Speaker 1: and I just had to maintain some poise which doesn't
Speaker 1: come naturally.
Speaker 2: Okay, but you try anyway. Okay. The one thing I
Speaker 2: can say is that the rules of regular life still apply,
Speaker 2: and so zero to one hundred is a bold approach.
Speaker 2: It can be commended in theory, but I think in
Speaker 2: practice it can't be trusted. So when someone goes straight
Speaker 2: for the DM straight proposition, I think you've done this
Speaker 2: far too many times. I'm but a notch on one's
Speaker 2: bed post. You're little too smooth that there's I feel
Speaker 2: like I could be anyone. You're just trying it on
Speaker 2: for size. So I think you need to first make
Speaker 2: the good first impression. However, you want to determine what
Speaker 2: that looks like for you, and then gradually build so
Speaker 2: there is room for the fire emoji. There is because
Speaker 2: it's the first step of an ever growing bond. Then
Speaker 2: hit them with a little react right, and then only
Speaker 2: when you have something of value to add, break that
Speaker 2: social wall, slide through and say something. Now. People fall
Speaker 2: into the trap of wanting to talk when they have
Speaker 2: nothing to say. Don't do this to yourself. Don't do
Speaker 2: this to yourself. It's not worth it. If you have
Speaker 2: to wait until they upload a story before you can
Speaker 2: break that social barrier, then wait because saying hey, how's
Speaker 2: it going? Please one from you and most of all,
Speaker 2: save you from yourself.
Speaker 1: My last suggestion, and this is for the more desperate
Speaker 1: among us. Do I condone this?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 1: But did I have anything else to add? Potentially? No?
Speaker 1: Also follow and unfolow bring it back. Let's bring back
Speaker 1: the follow and the unfollow.
Speaker 2: Why not?
Speaker 1: As we know an apocalypse could very well be nigh.
Speaker 1: Let's just crank it and then fall back on plausible deniability.
Speaker 2: Rules of the dm slide. Listen, please, it is always
Speaker 2: charm over a direct proposition. I know what the men's
Speaker 2: rights activists and the feminine energy coaches want to tell
Speaker 2: you that I'm at that you should go into the
Speaker 2: DMS with purpose and say, hey, do you want to
Speaker 2: go out to dinner?
Speaker 1: You can't.
Speaker 2: You can't raw dog it, babes, you can't row dog it.
Speaker 2: You need to prime the area, make sure it's red day,
Speaker 2: and then go. And by what I mean by that
Speaker 2: is that, like you need to make sure that you
Speaker 2: come across as an appealing person first before you assume
Speaker 2: that your proposition is warranted and would come across as flattering.
Speaker 2: Sometimes it hurts my feelings when some of you come
Speaker 2: on too strong? What will give you the impression that
Speaker 2: I would respond well to this? I don't even know you,
Speaker 2: and it's very odd when someone you have no context
Speaker 2: with at all is like, hey, I want to take
Speaker 2: you out. Okay, Bundy, I don't want to go out
Speaker 2: with you because I know how this works.
Speaker 1: I said, public profiles only. Yeah, some clear shots and
Speaker 1: no sunnies.
Speaker 2: Hopefully two mutual friends at a minimum. Please.
Speaker 1: We are we doing background checks? Okay, well, we're doing
Speaker 1: multiple background checks, so we check it. If you're dating,
Speaker 1: we'll be hitting up old friends to say, hey, I
Speaker 1: just matched with this person online. Give us a four
Speaker 1: on one.
Speaker 2: That's hot.
Speaker 1: You're listening to Flex and Rooms on Kata.
Speaker 2: Today we continue our series the Flex and Rooms Social
Speaker 2: Media Act Rules and Regulations for how to conduct yourself
Speaker 2: online by two online experts. Do we're talking about how
Speaker 2: do you actually support your friends online? A lot of talk.
Speaker 2: It's quite a contentious topic. I feel as though of
Speaker 2: all the things we've discussed, this one is really quite vague.
Speaker 2: But please begin.
Speaker 1: How to support your friends online? Many a time have
Speaker 1: I been asked to reshare and repost. Never once has
Speaker 1: this landed quite well for me.
Speaker 2: What is it the approach, the asking, the expectation that
Speaker 2: you would reshare something. What is it that's not landing.
Speaker 1: All of it? Because do not think I have the
Speaker 1: wherewithal or perhaps the foresight to want to share things
Speaker 1: if I want to share them. I can't understand asking,
Speaker 1: But like, I think it's hard when you're someone who
Speaker 1: shares tastes for a living, Like I have a newsletter.
Speaker 2: I'm a taste maker.
Speaker 1: No, but like where I share did it make the cut?
Speaker 1: So when I like, I believe that I've worked really
Speaker 1: hard to be able to share an opinion. That is,
Speaker 1: like I put a lot of weight to things because
Speaker 1: I don't share that much stuff. I have a newsletter
Speaker 1: dedicated to sharing other people's tastes or profiling people.
Speaker 2: Rewind it from doing Shrek impressions. I am a curator
Speaker 2: of taste and I put a lot of effort into
Speaker 2: what you go on here.
Speaker 1: Lockdown is a different time. Okay, there's different parameters. Nah,
Speaker 1: I will say, like, I get the hustle of asking,
Speaker 1: but there's something so beautiful in being able to choose
Speaker 1: yourself and you know, like not respecting, but like understanding
Speaker 1: that it's not as simple as just sharing no place.
Speaker 2: It's what's coming through. Okay, so can you give me
Speaker 2: an example of, like what stuff you've been asked to share?
Speaker 2: Just so like it's I've got some context? Is it
Speaker 2: the promo you don't like?
Speaker 1: Like?
Speaker 2: What is it? Someone says fund me, Like I don't.
Speaker 1: I never shared a gofund me. Okay, you know what
Speaker 1: it is. I think some people treat like friends of
Speaker 1: friends treat you know, my Instagram or other people's Instagram
Speaker 1: as if it's like a friend sharing amongst friends, Like
Speaker 1: I'm sharing with strangers that don't know who you are,
Speaker 1: unless you're like my best friend. Like I'll promote my
Speaker 1: best friend's book because she's my best friend and it
Speaker 1: looks good she does it to me, The books tisue. However,
Speaker 1: Like if you're a friend of a friend and you're
Speaker 1: doing like a clothes sale at a random market, Am
Speaker 1: I going to reshare it? Half my audience can't go
Speaker 1: half of them? Okay, I'm not even gonna go, Like
Speaker 1: and then you feel like there's this expectation, and then
Speaker 1: you feel bad. It's like you're a plumber and people
Speaker 1: ask you to just come and check something out. It's
Speaker 1: the exact same thing like you need to not value
Speaker 1: You don't need to do anything but like valuing time
Speaker 1: and then creating something. But heget it if it's something
Speaker 1: that you know that I would love, Like if you're
Speaker 1: doing I don't know. Gets me rolled up obviously.
Speaker 2: Yeah it's good you got that out there.
Speaker 1: Do you get riled up?
Speaker 2: Yeah? But I try not to take it personally because
Speaker 2: I understand those who do not do do not understand.
Speaker 2: We've said in philosophy a thousand times people think that
Speaker 2: they understand when they don't, and that's the fundamental issue.
Speaker 2: I think it's a fair question. I want to expand
Speaker 2: the reach of this thing, but emphasis is how do
Speaker 2: we support your friends? This is not like the reasons
Speaker 2: why I won't share, but how do we support your
Speaker 2: friends virtually? It took me some time to think of
Speaker 2: it because I'm like, it depends and I feel like
Speaker 2: there is a love language when it comes to social
Speaker 2: media usage. It's not just the one and done. For example,
Speaker 2: virtual PDIA. I have a lot of friends who really
Speaker 2: appreciate when you love on them publicly, right when you're
Speaker 2: in their comments type multiple posts. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2: They look good, You reshare it to your story. It's
Speaker 2: really important to them. Right. You have people who like
Speaker 2: obsessive meme curation. They want you to send them the
Speaker 2: good memes, and they send you memes and it's like
Speaker 2: this thing that you and you might just do it
Speaker 2: to humor them because you know it's their love language online.
Speaker 1: Right.
Speaker 2: I also think that some people really appreciate the active
Speaker 2: DM thread, like we're in. This is where we discuss,
Speaker 2: it's where we talk. I send you things, you send
Speaker 2: me things. We maintain our friendship in this way. Then
Speaker 2: there's people who like the unrelenting support. Every time they
Speaker 2: do something, it needs to be shared onto story, shared
Speaker 2: on to feed. My friend did this. Aren't they amazing?
Speaker 2: Look how amazing they are. I'm so excited you're out there, Gigla.
Speaker 2: I love them so much. I think you just have
Speaker 2: to do it in the way that they want it,
Speaker 2: which is a hard pill to swallow. And I'm not
Speaker 2: talking acquaintances. I'm talking your close.
Speaker 1: Friends, and it's you doing what you do for a living.
Speaker 1: Or is this if you had.
Speaker 2: These are just my rules for social media. I think
Speaker 2: social media like however you use it, it's how you
Speaker 2: use it. People make money on some people don't, but
Speaker 2: I think generally we get up in arms when we
Speaker 2: don't understand why people take certain things so seriously. Like
Speaker 2: you're getting frustrated by someone's like why someone would ask
Speaker 2: you to share something? They're like, why wouldn't I ask you?
Speaker 2: You're my friend and you have a platform, like this
Speaker 2: is a shortcut to my point, though, I feel like, Oh,
Speaker 2: and there's a lot friend who just doesn't care about
Speaker 2: social media and just prefers to you shop for them
Speaker 2: in real life where it matters to them. I think
Speaker 2: either way, if they're a good friend and if you
Speaker 2: really care about them, you just do what they request.
Speaker 2: Call it a day.
Speaker 1: I say, be liberal with the likes when someone's posting something,
Speaker 1: because I think for some people, posting a selfie or
Speaker 1: a post is a very anxiety inducing thing. In these times.
Speaker 1: It's easy to post on story, it's hard to post
Speaker 1: on the feed when you're out of practice. So I think,
Speaker 1: be liberal with your likes, Be liberal with the comments.
Speaker 1: We know some friends out here are doing some spon
Speaker 1: con Okay, if you see some spon contents, maybe not
Speaker 1: get enough love. Go in there and get in the comments. Okay,
Speaker 1: it's appreciated and it will come back to you tenfold.
Speaker 1: So I'll say, be vocal when it's a friend that
Speaker 1: has done something for you and also someone that you
Speaker 1: just really like.
Speaker 2: If you see something, say something precisely. This is flex
Speaker 2: and frooms on Kita.
Speaker 1: It is the social media act as created by flexing firms,
Speaker 1: and today we are talking about the rules around comments and.
Speaker 2: Likes, the rules around.
Speaker 1: My first rule is that you should only like things
Speaker 1: that you're happy with everyone seeing you like. As we know,
Speaker 1: feeds blend over. So you're on a dank Dare I
Speaker 1: say dank memes? It's giving older millennial a dank memes.
Speaker 1: I can't even say it. You're on a meme page, okay,
Speaker 1: and there is a particularly cooked meme, perhaps in the
Speaker 1: realms of mental illness, and you think that's a bit
Speaker 1: of me. Or sometimes I see ones that are about
Speaker 1: other mental illnesses that I don't relate to, and yet
Speaker 1: it's popping.
Speaker 2: The sentenios, the scent I'm catching it.
Speaker 1: Do I need to see a psychiatrist? This was one
Speaker 1: recently a good example by Stupid Bitch Energy, one of
Speaker 1: my favorite meme accounts. The meme was a tweet and
Speaker 1: I quote raw dogging the mental illness, no dating apps,
Speaker 1: just in the crib, mincing garlic fin as f slicing
Speaker 1: onions thinner than previously imagined, And in my head I
Speaker 1: just thought, how did somebody get footage of my apartment
Speaker 1: every Sunday making my voga pasta with minced garlic and
Speaker 1: very finely chopped onions so as not to feel them
Speaker 1: in the pasta sauce. I thought, that's a bit of me,
Speaker 1: But did I like it?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 1: Instead, I sent it back onto the meme creator and said,
Speaker 1: the way this is me making pasta every week?
Speaker 2: Why didn't you like it?
Speaker 1: I don't want to be throwing the mental illness card
Speaker 1: around on the internet. Respectfully interesting teach their own.
Speaker 2: I really believe that actually engaging on social media isn't
Speaker 2: the norm, and to have any expectations that somebody does
Speaker 2: is expecting too much. If Tier one is just having
Speaker 2: access to an account, then tier three and a half
Speaker 2: or even four of social media is liking and commenting.
Speaker 2: So if you want to participate, then I would say
Speaker 2: bear in mind that what you engage with dictates your algorithm.
Speaker 2: Too many of you are like, when is my algorithm? Sorry? Bad?
Speaker 2: Why is you're so good Because some of us treat
Speaker 2: this stuff like the vocation. Babe, you don't even know
Speaker 2: how it takes me to curate the meme selection. I
Speaker 2: have you think this happened overnight?
Speaker 1: He's toiling.
Speaker 2: Do you think that, no, I have to work this also?
Speaker 2: Do you able to segment my feats and not? Everything
Speaker 2: is girl boss pilled?
Speaker 1: That was simple. It's difficult.
Speaker 2: It's very difficult. So comment or whatever you want, like
Speaker 2: whatever you want. I actually think that comments and likes
Speaker 2: might be the worst part of social media, but I
Speaker 2: think if we take them away, people will stop posting.
Speaker 1: I agree we all need some dopamine hits. I judge
Speaker 1: people and what they like. Do you see what people like?
Speaker 1: Because I like you know, I'm looking. I just I'm looking.
Speaker 1: I'm looking on your doctor, Naomi's your other mean pages
Speaker 1: is stupid bitch energies, and I'm just looking at what
Speaker 1: people are liking. I think, Oh, you liked that. That's interesting.
Speaker 1: Mental note. I think you're funny for liking that. I
Speaker 1: think you get it.
Speaker 2: Wait, what do you think the purpose of a like is? Though?
Speaker 2: Because I feel like you're reading into it a lot.
Speaker 2: But are you saying we should read into it more.
Speaker 1: Yeah, read into everything a little bit more. Just send
Speaker 1: yourself mad. I also never comment. Yeah, I just say
Speaker 1: be discerning with your likes.
Speaker 2: This sounds like the kind of person like I'm waiting
Speaker 2: for the next three years when you get canceled because
Speaker 2: someone found your Twitter, not the Froom's Twitter, the one
Speaker 2: that you'll fince to Twitter, and you're like, no, sound
Speaker 2: me like, be discerning. What are we hiding?
Speaker 1: No, I just mean like, don't like. I don't know.
Speaker 1: I think that.
Speaker 2: Feels so like stifling and matter to be having to
Speaker 2: curate what you do and do not like based on consumption,
Speaker 2: based on the chance that someone will see it and
Speaker 2: not get it.
Speaker 1: Some people just don't get it. How are you seeing
Speaker 1: what people like?
Speaker 2: I don't understand.
Speaker 1: I just I just do. I don't know how, but
Speaker 1: I like. Essentially what I mean is I go and
Speaker 1: look at the likes just out of curiosity.
Speaker 2: This is what we should be talking about. We won't.
Speaker 1: Though you've been listening to the Flex in Frooms Daily podcast.
Speaker 1: For more, tune Indicator on DAB or stream it on iHeartRadio.