WEBVTT - MAFS: Awhina chats Rogue Participants & THAT Promo Shoot

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<v Speaker 1>Now the show that everyone across the country is talking about,

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<v Speaker 1>as they always are, it is married at First Sight.

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<v Speaker 1>And if you were across last night's show, something went

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<v Speaker 1>down on the couch when they were sitting across from

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<v Speaker 1>the relationship experts. So Athena and Adrian, they are the

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<v Speaker 1>couple that are at ground zero of a bit of

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<v Speaker 1>controversy at the moment regarding a promo shoot that Adrian

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<v Speaker 1>was unfortunately a bit but hurt about that he got

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<v Speaker 1>left out of. And also it comes down to this

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<v Speaker 1>commitment ceremony, you know when one person writes leave and

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<v Speaker 1>the other person writes stay. So Afena, she wanted to

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<v Speaker 1>leave the experiment and Adrian decided to stay. But we

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<v Speaker 1>have Afena on the phone. Afena, welcome to the show.

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<v Speaker 2>Helloi, thank you for having me.

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<v Speaker 3>Afina. I have a question that annoys me so much

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<v Speaker 3>about this show. Last night, you wrote at the ceremony

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<v Speaker 3>that you wanted to leave and Adrian wrote stay. And

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<v Speaker 3>it's like, I know, a lot of the public has

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<v Speaker 3>been angered by the fact that you are saying, Hey,

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<v Speaker 3>I don't want to be here anymore, and we are

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<v Speaker 3>seeing you be forced to stay. What does that feel like?

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<v Speaker 3>And do you actually, like, are you contractually obliged to

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<v Speaker 3>have to stay or could you if you really really

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<v Speaker 3>needed to get up and walk out.

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<v Speaker 2>So even for myself that in that moment, it was

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<v Speaker 2>really confusing because I don't watch LERGIV. I'm not watching

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<v Speaker 2>Math prior to this, so I don't really know all

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<v Speaker 2>the rules. But I was so sad that I was

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<v Speaker 2>going home, Like I'd already contacted my family and saying

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<v Speaker 2>like tonight, you know, I'm we're coming home tomorrow. I'd

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<v Speaker 2>already kind of laid the foundation to go back to work.

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<v Speaker 2>I'd contacted work saying I'll be back, you know, xbosa,

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<v Speaker 2>to go back to work, Like I thought there was

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<v Speaker 2>no way that we could be staying at this point

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<v Speaker 2>in time, like we're both done, very evidently we are

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<v Speaker 2>both done. But when he wrote day, my first reaction

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<v Speaker 2>was you've let me down again. Yeah, like you were

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<v Speaker 2>really letting me down in this moment, because I couldn't

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<v Speaker 2>fathom why you would put stay at this point in time,

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<v Speaker 2>And another part of me was do I have to stay?

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<v Speaker 2>And I did kind of mention, you know, to production,

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<v Speaker 2>like I'm going home, you know, And there was that,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, that awkward kind of conversation where it's like, oh,

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<v Speaker 2>that's not.

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<v Speaker 3>The rules of this experiment, like you physically aren't allowed to,

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<v Speaker 3>like you could get in trouble from a contract do

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<v Speaker 3>you sign? Because that just seems so crazy to me

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<v Speaker 3>that you were forced to stay somewhere you don't want

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<v Speaker 3>to be.

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<v Speaker 2>You know, I think Heinz that's a really beautiful thing.

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<v Speaker 2>When you're in that moment and you kind of living

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<v Speaker 2>in all you know, your sadness, and you're going, I

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<v Speaker 2>really want to go home. But when they're saying that

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<v Speaker 2>you can't, you kind of have that little bit of

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<v Speaker 2>element like, oh I can't. Like I know it sounds

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<v Speaker 2>so crazy outside perspective, but I was so like, oh cool,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm going home and they're like, no, that's not part

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<v Speaker 2>of the rules. You almost feel like oh okay, like

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<v Speaker 2>there's rules I have to kind of stay. But Heinz,

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<v Speaker 2>that's a beautiful thing. And you're watching back and you're like,

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<v Speaker 2>did I have to a fema? Like yeah?

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<v Speaker 1>Do you know what?

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<v Speaker 3>Though?

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<v Speaker 1>I think like you become institutionalized and the producers it

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<v Speaker 1>is their job to get you to do the things

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<v Speaker 1>that they need you to do. Creating a TV show

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<v Speaker 1>and I honestly do think that, like so much of it,

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<v Speaker 1>you almost become like worried about disappointing people by not

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<v Speaker 1>following the rules because you feel guilty that you've stepped

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<v Speaker 1>outside of of what you've been told that you're supposed

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<v Speaker 1>to do. And I say this from you know, doing

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<v Speaker 1>The Bachelor of many many moons ago. You kind of

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<v Speaker 1>find yourself in this weird situation where you're almost being

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<v Speaker 1>obedient because you feel as though it's what you have

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<v Speaker 1>to do.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, I feel that, And there is that guilt factor

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<v Speaker 2>as well. You do feel guilty. You're like, Okay, someone

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<v Speaker 2>else's here on this experience and you know they're saying

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<v Speaker 2>stay and they're trying and they want to give it

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<v Speaker 2>a go. And then you do have that element of

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<v Speaker 2>production and external voices also kind of it's not really

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<v Speaker 2>a relationship between two people. It's a relationship between like,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, twenty people produce.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, that's so interesting. Hey, Athina, talk to me a

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<v Speaker 1>bit about Adrian. So we saw that he kicked up

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<v Speaker 1>a bit of a stink or actually a very big

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<v Speaker 1>stink over the fact that he wasn't included in this

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<v Speaker 1>maths pro video that was created. He left his ring

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<v Speaker 1>on the table and he walked out as though he'd

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<v Speaker 1>thrown his toys out of the prem Very dramatic, But

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<v Speaker 1>there's been he's dose interviews since and he said that

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<v Speaker 1>that's not how it went down, and that he was

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<v Speaker 1>actually told by producers that he had to leave the show.

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<v Speaker 1>What is your version of the events of what happened?

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<v Speaker 2>Adrian struggles with accountability, But I understand, like I can

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<v Speaker 2>look at it from an empathetic point of view. You

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<v Speaker 2>were hurt, your ego was bruised, You did feel left out,

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<v Speaker 2>he felt excluded. I just think that there were so

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<v Speaker 2>many other ways he could have handled that situation and

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<v Speaker 2>he chose wrong.

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<v Speaker 3>So do you think that he chose to leave and

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<v Speaker 3>he's making an excuse saying that they told him to go,

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<v Speaker 3>or do you think the producers genuinely said pack your

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<v Speaker 3>bags and go trying to.

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<v Speaker 2>Like Adrian made that decision to leave. Ye, right, he

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<v Speaker 2>needs to have some accountability, Jose. But for him, I

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<v Speaker 2>think it was feelings. He was feeling hurt. Yeah, he

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<v Speaker 2>was feeling like he was a victim at this moment.

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<v Speaker 2>He was upset, and he really acted on those of

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<v Speaker 2>the more then if he had leant in with vulnerability,

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<v Speaker 2>we would have had such a different outcome if he

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<v Speaker 2>had said, I'm hurt, I'm feeling, you know, disincluded. I'm

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<v Speaker 2>unsure why, like we could have tackled it together. Again,

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<v Speaker 2>I've said it multiple times. I think I've shown at

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<v Speaker 2>this point I can be very empathetic to most situations,

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<v Speaker 2>and I'm here to be your partner and your teammate,

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<v Speaker 2>but you need to help me help you, and at

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<v Speaker 2>this point you weren't giving me much.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, this is what he said. He said, I'm pissed

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<v Speaker 1>off that I'm not in the promo. It's disrespectful and

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<v Speaker 1>I'm not going to be treated like that. I'm not

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<v Speaker 1>coming back until they get me in the promo. Even

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<v Speaker 1>just reading that, do you, when you think about like

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<v Speaker 1>your experience in there and what it was like to

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<v Speaker 1>be alongside him partnered, do you think he was in

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<v Speaker 1>there because he wanted a relationship or do you think

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<v Speaker 1>he was in there because he wanted the fame that

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<v Speaker 1>comes with being on Maths.

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<v Speaker 2>It's really hard because I dreamed one hundred percent believe

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<v Speaker 2>that some people were on there for what comes afterwards.

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<v Speaker 2>But I do think that those same people also were

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<v Speaker 2>open to love. You know, everyone used such different language.

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<v Speaker 2>I know I went in there and I just couldn't

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<v Speaker 2>wait to meet this person. I think for him, you know,

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<v Speaker 2>the bonus would have been if the person at the

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<v Speaker 2>end of the hour was a match.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah right, you know I have to just like try.

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<v Speaker 1>I love the positivity on them. Could be probably isn't,

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<v Speaker 1>but we'll see.

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<v Speaker 3>You got a producer right behind. I do have to

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<v Speaker 3>say one thing. I'm trying to put myself in that position.

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<v Speaker 3>Like if I was on The Bachelor and every other

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<v Speaker 3>cast member was in a promo and I wasn't, and

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<v Speaker 3>they were like, go sit outside, your brain would start

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<v Speaker 3>to be like, well, hang on, what's going on here?

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<v Speaker 3>Is something going to happen to me on this show

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<v Speaker 3>and that's why they're not included me, Like you might

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<v Speaker 3>start to be I can understand why his ego is.

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<v Speaker 3>I don't think you're handled it the right way, but

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<v Speaker 3>I do want to know you've got some of you

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<v Speaker 3>guys going very rogue, like Jackie on her socials is

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<v Speaker 3>just like spilling the absolute tea, and we know that

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<v Speaker 3>you're not allowed to do that. We know contractually you're not.

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<v Speaker 3>You're supposed to hand over your social media? Is there

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<v Speaker 3>any backlash or repercussions? Like, are you guys getting in

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<v Speaker 3>trouble for this stuff?

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<v Speaker 2>Honestly, I've been asked myself the same question. I'm kind

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<v Speaker 2>of like, it almost feels like certain people just get

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<v Speaker 2>away with murder. What are the repercussions? Maybe I'm gonna

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<v Speaker 2>go rogue, Yeah, tell us something. There was moments in

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<v Speaker 2>that experiment, Yeah, that absolutely have been cut from what's

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<v Speaker 2>being shown, And there was moments where we you know,

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<v Speaker 2>there is that little bit of coersion, and there was

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<v Speaker 2>moments where we just didn't show up authentically as ourselves.

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<v Speaker 2>I do think that a lot of the applicants going

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<v Speaker 2>rogue right now, you're probably better off not going rogue

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<v Speaker 2>because I think they're not actually helping themselves. Like from

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<v Speaker 2>what I'm seeing from these rogue pos and these rogue

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<v Speaker 2>podcasts or channels or everything they're doing. I'm like the

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<v Speaker 2>character that you want to show people who you are,

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<v Speaker 2>Like there better version, You're not doing that right now.

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<v Speaker 1>Do you think that people have been shown pretty much

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<v Speaker 1>on par with how they behaved, because everyone always comes

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<v Speaker 1>out and says like, oh, it's the edit, I'm actually

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<v Speaker 1>this person, not that person. From your experience, do you

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<v Speaker 1>think that it's been pretty honest to the way people

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<v Speaker 1>were in that experiment?

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<v Speaker 2>From what I've seen so far, it's absolutely been what

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<v Speaker 2>I've seen when I was in this experiment. That's the

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<v Speaker 2>characters that can shine. But also one thing I will

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<v Speaker 2>be honest about is I'm not behind closed doors. I

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<v Speaker 2>don't know what conversations are having off camera. I don't

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<v Speaker 2>know everyone's situation to maybe how they acted was not

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<v Speaker 2>authentic to who they were. I know myself personally, there

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<v Speaker 2>was some moments in that experiment where I'm like, that's

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<v Speaker 2>not me, but how I'm feeling and when you're around

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<v Speaker 2>all this negativity sometimes that manifests outwards. So I don't

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<v Speaker 2>know what they were going through. But what I've seen

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<v Speaker 2>so far are the characters that I've seen in real life.

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<v Speaker 2>But I do think there were more high moments in

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<v Speaker 2>most relationships, but you're not going to show those. You're

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<v Speaker 2>going to show just the crash of the roller coaster,

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<v Speaker 2>not the highest that come with it.

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<v Speaker 1>And Afina, you also have like such a different element

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<v Speaker 1>to it as well, because I mean, when you have

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<v Speaker 1>kids and you're going into an experiment like this, like

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<v Speaker 1>you have a six year so the stakes are so

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<v Speaker 1>much higher. It's not just a reality TV show. You

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<v Speaker 1>have to consider how it affects your family at home

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<v Speaker 1>and also the type of person that you're potentially bringing

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<v Speaker 1>into your family at home. What was going through your

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<v Speaker 1>head when you're in the situation where you're wanting to

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<v Speaker 1>leave to get back to your son and you're being

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<v Speaker 1>told that you're going to stay.

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<v Speaker 2>I was really sad. I just I really got into

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<v Speaker 2>my victim mentality, which I shouldn't have. You know, we're

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<v Speaker 2>all going through our own struggles and trials. But I

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<v Speaker 2>did think to myself, like, this person's not going to be,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, a role model to my child right now.

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<v Speaker 2>And I feel like we tolerate more in ourselves than

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<v Speaker 2>we ever would on our children. I know it sounds

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<v Speaker 2>really bad, but you know, the behaviors and the actions

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<v Speaker 2>and everything else. Had I been in that experiment with

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<v Speaker 2>my son right next to me, would I have stayed

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<v Speaker 2>week once? I don't know, like, probably not. But I'm

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<v Speaker 2>so disconnected from my son and I'm disconnected from my reality.

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<v Speaker 2>And you know, even though it's on the back of

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<v Speaker 2>my head every day, like if this person's gonna be

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<v Speaker 2>good enough for my child. You do kind of lose

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<v Speaker 2>that sense of reality and you're kind of stuck. Oh,

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<v Speaker 2>it's he and I in this relationship, but it was hard.

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<v Speaker 3>So Fanny's still together.

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<v Speaker 2>You just have to watch him.

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<v Speaker 3>Fine now, all right, Well we're gonna stay tuned. We're all.

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<v Speaker 3>You've got a hook line and singer, so I can't

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<v Speaker 3>wait to see what happens. But I hope whatever it is,

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<v Speaker 3>love and happiness does find you and your son.

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<v Speaker 2>Look, maybe I rub off an Adrian. You know.

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<v Speaker 3>Well, we

0:10:34.480 --> 0:10:37.840
<v Speaker 2>Thanks so much of Ana, all right, thank you, bye,