WEBVTT - MINI! When is the right time to introduce your kids to a new partner? 🤔

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<v Speaker 1>It is their pickup with Britt, Laura and Mitch right

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<v Speaker 1>around Australia. Welcome Hi, rushing to Chemists Warehouse this Father's

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<v Speaker 1>Day for big brand fragrances at the lowest prices Chemists

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<v Speaker 1>Warehouse great savings. Every day you're on the pickup. That

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<v Speaker 1>means it's time for this.

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<v Speaker 2>Ask a cat, So ask on Kut is something that

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<v Speaker 2>we do on our podcast Life Uncut every week. It

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<v Speaker 2>is where we answer you're deep, you're duck, and you're

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<v Speaker 2>burning questions. And now we have quite a tricky question

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<v Speaker 2>today about when is the appropriate time to introduce kids

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<v Speaker 2>to your new partner.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, Katie on thirteen one of sixty five. Holo Katie,

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<v Speaker 1>what's going on? What's your question?

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<v Speaker 3>Hi guys, So my question is I've been a relationship

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<v Speaker 3>now for six months with someone I'm very into, I'm

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<v Speaker 3>in love with, and I want to introduce him to

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<v Speaker 3>my kids. I'm just not sure on if it's right

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<v Speaker 3>time now, when to do it, what I should do.

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<v Speaker 3>We both have been married before and both now divorce.

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<v Speaker 3>This will be the first partner we've both introduced our

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<v Speaker 3>kids too. We don't want to stuff it up.

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<v Speaker 2>It's so's some advice. How many kids you guys, do

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<v Speaker 2>you have kids? Does he have kids? Like, what's the dynamics.

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<v Speaker 3>We both have kids. So I've got an eight and

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<v Speaker 3>a ten year old and he has a nine and

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<v Speaker 3>eleven year old, so we like the Brady bunch. We've

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<v Speaker 3>got one between like, yeah, four ages.

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<v Speaker 2>Do the kids know that you're that you've been dating

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<v Speaker 2>or this comes? Oh, they do know. They know that

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<v Speaker 2>you've been kind of you know, seeing what's out there.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah. So I've said that I've got a boyfriend, and

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<v Speaker 3>he said that to his girlfriend to his kids, but

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<v Speaker 3>we haven't introduced them to each other yet, and we

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<v Speaker 3>just want to make sure we get it right because

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<v Speaker 3>this is both really important to us, so we want

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<v Speaker 3>to make sure we get right.

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<v Speaker 4>From the outside, I would say I wouldn't be I mean,

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<v Speaker 4>I've had friends in this situation. I wouldn't be doing

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<v Speaker 4>any introductions unless you thought it was really seriously. I

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<v Speaker 4>know that you say you love each other, but there's

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<v Speaker 4>a difference between being in love with each other and

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<v Speaker 4>actually wanting a future. I think if you know you're

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<v Speaker 4>going to be serious, that's when you make the introductions

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<v Speaker 4>to each other. And I think I imagine myself just

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<v Speaker 4>doing a really fun day out, something really low key.

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<v Speaker 4>Everyone's hanging out. You're not too affectionate, like public in

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<v Speaker 4>front of the kids with each other. It's more just

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<v Speaker 4>like exactly what you said, the Brady Bunch goes to

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<v Speaker 4>a park day or whatever it is. It makes it

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<v Speaker 4>really low key, maybe a small amount of time, an

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<v Speaker 4>hour or two, just as like a soft intro.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, eight and eleven is really young, but it's also

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<v Speaker 2>old enough to know what's going on. Like I mean,

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<v Speaker 2>my parents were divorced when I was young, and both

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<v Speaker 2>my parents dated and we got introduced to boyfriends and

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<v Speaker 2>to girlfriends and remember that now was yeah, I totally

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<v Speaker 2>remember it. I did upset you, going, this is mum

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<v Speaker 2>and Dad's new partner.

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<v Speaker 1>No.

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<v Speaker 2>But I think the thing that made it challenging for

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<v Speaker 2>me is like my mom had a few different boyfriends

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<v Speaker 2>throughout my childhood, and I guess like you get attached

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<v Speaker 2>to them and then they leave, you know, So it

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<v Speaker 2>is really hard if you then kind of feel like

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<v Speaker 2>you have a connection with that person and then after

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<v Speaker 2>a year or two years, they're no longer in your

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<v Speaker 2>life anymore. On the flip side of that, if you

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<v Speaker 2>don't like the person and your parents don't do things

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<v Speaker 2>kind of in a slow way, which having my stepdad,

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<v Speaker 2>I couldn't stand him. It kind of felt like my

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<v Speaker 2>feelings didn't matter, but everybody else's feelings were prioritize. So

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<v Speaker 2>it's really it is funny that balance. But make it

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<v Speaker 2>fun and keep the interactions short during the day and

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<v Speaker 2>just don't do sleepovers until you get to a point

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<v Speaker 2>where it's become like you feel like they're part of

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<v Speaker 2>the family, and also that the kids feel like they

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<v Speaker 2>have a bit of a say in it as well.

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<v Speaker 4>Katie, what's the relationship like with your kid's dad? And

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<v Speaker 4>also like his ex as well.

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<v Speaker 3>He dated someone pretty much straight away. I didn't read

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<v Speaker 3>into that how you will, but they lived together for

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<v Speaker 3>a couple of years, and they met her a fair

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<v Speaker 3>way into their relationship because they lived overseas, and the

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<v Speaker 3>kids didn't really like her. And that's what I think

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<v Speaker 3>I'm a little bit scared of because I don't want

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<v Speaker 3>that to be with this because I've dated people for

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<v Speaker 3>the last four years and nothing's really ever been good

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<v Speaker 3>enough to introduce them to if that makes sense. Like

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<v Speaker 3>I've been very wary of not bringing in every person

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<v Speaker 3>that's sort of Oh they're nice. Why not? It's been

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<v Speaker 3>like it has to be something that is going somewhere,

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<v Speaker 3>And like I had a relationship for eighteen months that

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<v Speaker 3>never went anywhere, and so they never ever knew he

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<v Speaker 3>even existed. Wo Yeah, Like I made sure that I've

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<v Speaker 3>only ever introduced or never introduced really anyone as a boyfriend.

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<v Speaker 3>And I know this one's going somewhere. I finally found

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<v Speaker 3>someone who is worth that, and I just want to

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<v Speaker 3>make sure that I get it right for the kids

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<v Speaker 3>and for us as well, because you know, we want

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<v Speaker 3>a future together, you know, and the kids are the

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<v Speaker 3>most important part, and we both recognize that. Well.

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<v Speaker 2>I think it sounds like you were both amazing parents.

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<v Speaker 2>And the fact that you already are thinking so much

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<v Speaker 2>about how they're going to respond, and the fact that

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<v Speaker 2>you've already taken so many precautions to protect them along

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<v Speaker 2>this way, I actually think you've done everything right, and

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<v Speaker 2>just taking small steps and not forcing time upon them

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<v Speaker 2>is probably the next bit. But I think the sounds

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<v Speaker 2>of things you actually are doing everything right. By your

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<v Speaker 2>sound amazing.

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<v Speaker 1>You're going to get the partner that they love, and

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<v Speaker 1>then your exes part of who they hate like you've

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<v Speaker 1>won the breakup.

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<v Speaker 3>That's brilliant.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, that was brilliant. That's the best situation. We'll keep

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<v Speaker 1>us up dated, Katie. Okay, hope that helps. Yeah, no worries, Katie. Also,

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<v Speaker 1>we're gonna give you a double pass to the Life

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<v Speaker 1>Uncut Live show happening later in the year.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, and you can bring your boyfriend because it'll be

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<v Speaker 2>a great education piece for him.

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<v Speaker 3>I will do that. Thank you so much, guys. I've

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<v Speaker 3>been afairs for such a long time. It's lovely to

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<v Speaker 3>talk to me.

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<v Speaker 1>I wait to see that, all right, still to come

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<v Speaker 1>here at the Pickup. You guys know Olivia Fraser from

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<v Speaker 1>Married at First Sight?

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<v Speaker 2>Hi, Yes, she's so and was so controversial on MASS

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<v Speaker 2>and she copps so much trolling and backlash after that

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<v Speaker 2>show finished.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, well, she's been emotional on Socials this week. She

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<v Speaker 1>moved overseas for a new lover, or so she thought

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<v Speaker 1>it all went wrong, and she's going to join us

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<v Speaker 1>from Scotland to tell us her story next on the Pickup.