Speaker 1: Is it just me a podcast by a couple of
Speaker 1: midget I've got a moral conundrum. I need your two
Speaker 1: cents on here. Okay, So if you've been keeping a
Speaker 1: close eye on my Instagram, you would know that I'm
Speaker 1: currently in my walking era.
Speaker 2: I've got you muched, unfortunately, but I can imagine that's fun.
Speaker 1: Well, I'm making it known that I'm in my walking
Speaker 1: era because I really was not getting enough steps in
Speaker 1: my day.
Speaker 2: Yeah, there was one fucking.
Speaker 1: Day that I had a low of forty nine steps.
Speaker 2: Mitchell. That's shocking.
Speaker 1: I know, I know exactly what happened on that day.
Speaker 1: I had a big night, I was hungover, I woke up,
Speaker 1: walked to the office, edited this podcast. On a Sunday,
Speaker 1: I uploaded it, went back to bed. Wow that was
Speaker 1: my forty nine step day. And I was like, right, okay,
Speaker 1: I need to fucking up the end of here. I
Speaker 1: got a notification the other day saying, oh, your average
Speaker 1: daily steps have risen this month. Fuck goes that?
Speaker 2: Hell done? How done?
Speaker 1: That's big. But the thing is, I've got this weird,
Speaker 1: fucking toxic trait where I hate aimlessly walking. I don't
Speaker 1: like to just go for a walk for no fucking reason.
Speaker 2: That's the point of it. But the reason is you're
Speaker 2: going to better your health.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but that's not enough of me. I like to
Speaker 1: kill two birds with one stone. I'm an afficient honey. So,
Speaker 1: like you know, people usually ge pissed off when you
Speaker 1: get a little slip from the post office you have
Speaker 1: to go pick it up. I'm like, perfect an excuse
Speaker 1: to walk. That's two k's both ways.
Speaker 2: Oh so you need something to do.
Speaker 1: Yes, I need to be walking for a reason. Otherwise
Speaker 1: it feels like a waste of time, which I know
Speaker 1: is a stupid way of thinking about it.
Speaker 2: What about what about if you aim to finish a podcast?
Speaker 1: Well, sometimes podcasts are getting shorter and shorter these days.
Speaker 2: Yeah, they really are.
Speaker 1: And also what happens is I'll hit play on the
Speaker 1: podcast in the house, and then I'll start procrastinating, and
Speaker 1: then the podcast is nearly finished and I'm like, I
Speaker 1: haven't even started the walking.
Speaker 2: I do the same thing. I take phone calls when
Speaker 2: I walk. I prefer to chat to people. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: I do call my family, call you meet you when
Speaker 2: i'm walking.
Speaker 1: Have I ever gotten a walking call for you?
Speaker 2: Yeah? You have. If I'm out of breath and sound
Speaker 2: like I'm about to die.
Speaker 1: Then. Yeah, but one of my friends came up with
Speaker 1: a suggestion because I don't like to walk for no reason.
Speaker 1: They said, why did you become a dog walker? And
Speaker 1: I was like, fucking bingo. I love that because not
Speaker 1: only do I need a reason to walk, but I
Speaker 1: also need accountability.
Speaker 2: And you're getting paid.
Speaker 1: True, well, I wouldn't even fucking charge. I don't mind.
Speaker 1: I just want to be able to have a reason
Speaker 1: to leave. And also someone's expecting me there at a
Speaker 1: certain time in a certain days, so I have to
Speaker 1: actually go. I can't bitch it. Yeah, because, yeah, that's
Speaker 1: that's the Why do you think I'm going to politis classes?
Speaker 1: Because I have a time and a place to be there.
Speaker 2: You hate dogs? You're a cat guy.
Speaker 1: I'm actually not. I was always a dog person. The
Speaker 1: reason I didn't get a dog was because I was
Speaker 1: working here and didn't have time.
Speaker 2: To walk it.
Speaker 1: Okay, fair, fair, But now that I'm a lady of leisure,
Speaker 1: essentially I've got time to walk dogs.
Speaker 2: So you're gonna put a little tear off on a
Speaker 2: post it note around town?
Speaker 1: Well, I actually signed up to I don't know it's
Speaker 1: sort of like a dog walking market place. It's an hour.
Speaker 2: Why does it exist? What's it called?
Speaker 1: What is it called? Actually, it's called not sponsored walk
Speaker 1: and Wall. No, it's called Porchhake Porsche.
Speaker 2: That's funny. Yeah, it's a very funny name.
Speaker 1: And so this was months ago. I set up my
Speaker 1: poor Shake profile. I got Chat GBT to write a description.
Speaker 1: It's like, I'm a passionate, enthusiastic dog walker, blah blah
Speaker 1: blah blah, fucking mad about dogs.
Speaker 2: My toil is wagging at the thought of walking.
Speaker 1: Your beloved wouldn't have said tail wagging? Jesus, what's my tail?
Speaker 2: Oh? Stop it?
Speaker 1: But anyway, this was months ago that I signed up
Speaker 1: to be a dog walker, and I honestly fucking forgot.
Speaker 1: This week I got my first inquiry. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: my first customer. But this is where the moral dilemma
Speaker 1: comes in.
Speaker 2: Oh you fuck them? No, sorry, I don't know.
Speaker 1: So they've inquired about me walking their gorgeous little dog
Speaker 1: named Ladybug.
Speaker 2: Okay, do you have a photo of Lady book.
Speaker 1: I'm trying to find it. But I think Poor Shake
Speaker 1: might be fucking glitching at the moment because it keeps
Speaker 1: saying four oh four being not found. I did have
Speaker 1: a photo of Ladybug. I'd love to show you one
Speaker 1: of those little fucking black mare tea things. No, not
Speaker 1: like a what do you call it? Fuck black French bulldog? Okay,
Speaker 1: And so they are going away for three weeks and
Speaker 1: there's a few days a week that their partner isn't home.
Speaker 1: So they want me to do Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.
Speaker 2: Okay, right for.
Speaker 1: Three weeks, and so they want me to do it,
Speaker 1: and I really want to do it. However, here's the
Speaker 1: fucking problem. Right, two of the days I'm going to
Speaker 1: be in fucking Ularu. Ah oh, and so tomorrow I'm
Speaker 1: doing my meet and greet with Ladybug to make sure
Speaker 1: I'm a good fit. Do I or do I not
Speaker 1: flag that I'm actually not available?
Speaker 2: Oh?
Speaker 1: No, because I really want to do it. I'm so excited.
Speaker 2: You can't get Ai to help me with this one.
Speaker 2: AI can't walk the fucking dog. You need to be honest.
Speaker 2: You have to tell them that you can't. You're in
Speaker 2: Ularu unless you want to take ding fucking beetle with
Speaker 2: you there and walk him around the red dot. Otherwise, no,
Speaker 2: but I.
Speaker 1: Really want to do it, and I'm like, if this
Speaker 1: person's away for three weeks, how would they even know?
Speaker 1: I don't if I don't turn up and walk it.
Speaker 2: That's the more mma. Okay, I was thinking just tell
Speaker 2: them no, but I get it you're thinking of.
Speaker 1: Lying as I really want to walk this fucking dog.
Speaker 1: I'm so excited. It's so funny.
Speaker 2: How many days would you not be able to walk it?
Speaker 1: I think they're asking me to walk it three times
Speaker 1: a week for three weeks, so that's nine, So two
Speaker 1: out of nine. I think that's fine.
Speaker 2: The dog can have a rest.
Speaker 1: But I can't just leave the dog unattended, No, I
Speaker 1: would have to give the key to a friend or something.
Speaker 2: Wait, are you also feeding this dog day and every
Speaker 2: day and night?
Speaker 1: We haven't nutted out the details yet. I have my
Speaker 1: meet and greet tomorrow.
Speaker 2: So they must be. If you're only working it twice
Speaker 2: a week or three times a week, someone else must
Speaker 2: be coming to feed it every other day because you've
Speaker 2: got to feed the dog morning.
Speaker 1: Another partner. So it's a couple. One of them's going
Speaker 1: away for three weeks, the other one is kind of
Speaker 1: in and out of the house sometimes they're sometimes not.
Speaker 1: And so the days that poor little Ladybug is home alone,
Speaker 1: that's when they've enlisted Mitchell the darlingdog walker from Paulshake
Speaker 1: dot Com Dotteue to come in and pick up the slack.
Speaker 1: But I don't want them to hire someone else. If
Speaker 1: I tell them I can't do these days, they might
Speaker 1: hire someone else.
Speaker 2: Mitchell, there's plenty of dot and I'll.
Speaker 1: Have all nine shifts ripped out of my hand.
Speaker 2: Shifts sound like a fifteen year old about to work
Speaker 2: at McDonald's. No, say no, you don't want to be
Speaker 2: to be involved in the death of a dog.
Speaker 1: Why would it die?
Speaker 2: You just don't know. I catastrophize everything. So what if
Speaker 2: poor little gumdrop got hit by a vase or something
Speaker 2: when you weren't home, but you were meant to find
Speaker 2: it the next day, but you didn'tcause you're in the
Speaker 2: red center.
Speaker 1: But I wouldn't leave the dog there without anyone checking in.
Speaker 1: But would you get somebody else? You know? Is that
Speaker 1: an option? I don't know either. I'm honest, and I
Speaker 1: tell them there's two days I can't do here, and
Speaker 1: I risk them pulling out all together and going with
Speaker 1: someone else, or I.
Speaker 2: Say sure, I'll be there, Mitch.
Speaker 1: I'll be there, But then I just give their house
Speaker 1: cays to another friend. You may can go look after Ladybug.
Speaker 2: Are you angling that you want me to go and
Speaker 2: fill in for your two days and look after that?
Speaker 1: And I was hoping you'd offer. I think that's a
Speaker 1: great idea.
Speaker 2: What are the dates?
Speaker 1: Monday and Tuesday, the fifth and sixth of June. Perfect
Speaker 1: anytime between an am and four pm, just half an
Speaker 1: hour amazing.
Speaker 2: Oh, I actually can't. I can't Monday. I could Tuesday,
Speaker 2: but I can't Monday.
Speaker 1: I might be too confusing for poor little lady. Multiple
Speaker 1: new faces in the house.
Speaker 2: She would love me. I do smell of beef brisket,
Speaker 2: so she really enjoy my appearance. But then that would
Speaker 2: confuse her. If I'm coming in, then you're coming into
Speaker 2: the third gay man's coming in too much.
Speaker 1: I'm really confused now because the poor shake app it
Speaker 1: seems to be working, but my message history is gone.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, they've blocked you.
Speaker 1: I'm not kidding, they've blocked you. Like I checked this
Speaker 1: half an hour ago because I wanted the photo up
Speaker 1: on my phone to show you what Ladybug looks like,
Speaker 1: and now I don't have any message.
Speaker 2: Have you been ghosted by Ladybug? Ghosted?
Speaker 1: No, I'll be very up.
Speaker 2: This has devastated I'm really sorry. Wait broke it, aren't
Speaker 2: we not necessarily not necessarily no, but I'm all all likely.
Speaker 1: So look, look, when I click view message in my email,
Speaker 1: they let me know when I've got a new message.
Speaker 1: Of course, they said, are you able to do a
Speaker 1: meet and greet this week? And I said sure Friday?
Speaker 1: When I clicked that four o four page cannot be found.
Speaker 1: Is it glitching or have I been ditched?
Speaker 2: Mitchell, you've been I think you've been dished. Is there
Speaker 2: a phone app you can check?
Speaker 1: I'm trying that too.
Speaker 2: Oh, then you've been ditched. I'm shattered. Hold on, Maybe
Speaker 2: Ladybug has passed and they've pulled blisting.
Speaker 1: That's possible. Wait, look on the phone app, the messages
Speaker 1: doesn't work, neither it's anything else. So maybe it is
Speaker 1: just a fuck up with the website. I could still
Speaker 1: be in the running to be Ladybug's part time babysitter.
Speaker 2: I can't imagine poor Shake's getting enough foot traffic to
Speaker 2: have an on demand tech team.
Speaker 1: So poor traffic.
Speaker 2: Apologies yes, you're right, Portra.
Speaker 1: I love watching the cogs in your brain turn decend
Speaker 1: like what Yeah, I didn't get.
Speaker 2: It and I did get it. All right. Well I'm
Speaker 2: not helping you, but I don't think you'll need help
Speaker 2: because I think you've been fired. Yeah, apologies there, Yeah,
Speaker 2: sorry about that moral conundrum and fixed.
Speaker 1: Yeah, at least you have an answer.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you've got your answer.
Speaker 1: But that was my first inquiry in months.
Speaker 2: That says something about your profile. We need to give
Speaker 2: it some work. If that's your first bite in months,
Speaker 2: what are you doing wrong?
Speaker 1: You were just the one accusing Porshake of not having
Speaker 1: that much foot traffic. So poor traffic, poor traffic?
Speaker 2: Thank you? Oh no, well, how.
Speaker 1: Else am I supposed to advertise that I want to
Speaker 1: walk people's dogs?
Speaker 2: Print out a piece of paper, you cut little flat
Speaker 2: things at the bottom, and then you put it on
Speaker 2: a flag pole.
Speaker 1: I don't want to give out my fucking mobile number.
Speaker 2: All right, If you are in the Sydney metropolitan area
Speaker 2: and you need your dog walked, and that's not a euphemism,
Speaker 2: a wolf wolf Mitchell will do it for you, but
Speaker 2: not in the dates that he is in the red
Speaker 2: center because he's busy. Yeah, there you go, transparency open.
Speaker 2: I reckon, you'll get bookings, Mitchell. All you need to
Speaker 2: do is senters a text to what.
Speaker 1: Number over one two seven, two nine two.
Speaker 2: That's all right. Also, if you've got any other animals, Mitchell,
Speaker 2: walk them. You can walk around, but these days, you know,
Speaker 2: in the world.
Speaker 1: I've had experience with guinea pig handling. I can walk
Speaker 1: a guinea peap Yeah.
Speaker 2: He host this show with me every week, so he
Speaker 2: can handle a rodent.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you got the pig bit right.
Speaker 2: All right, Well, good luck, Mitchell. Keep us up to
Speaker 2: date with your new your newfound venture. Is It Just
Speaker 2: Me a podcast by a couple of mitches. Make sure
Speaker 2: you've hit follow on your podcast aff