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Speaker 1: It's the Happy Families podcast. It's the podcast for the

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Speaker 1: time poor parent who just wants answers.

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Speaker 2: Now, why don't you know what's changed? And she looked

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Speaker 2: at me as only a little six year old can,

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Speaker 2: and she said, Mummy, I changed my heart.

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Speaker 1: And now here's the stars of our show, my mom

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Speaker 1: and dad.

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Speaker 3: Hello.

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Speaker 4: This is doctor Justin Colson, who is struggling to read

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Speaker 4: this morning. I'm the author of six books about raising

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Speaker 4: happy families. I'm here with my wife and podcast partner

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Speaker 4: Kylie missus Happy Families, and we've got a five star

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Speaker 4: rating and review from what I thought said l Bin Germany,

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Speaker 4: but Missus Happy Families has pointed out that it.

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Speaker 2: Might be LB in Germany.

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Speaker 4: I've misread that, so LB in Germany. We really appreciate

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Speaker 4: you sending through some comments on the podcast.

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Speaker 3: Thank you.

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Speaker 2: Love the sharing of real life five stars. Just listen

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Speaker 2: to your episode I'll Do Tomorrow two one hundred and

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Speaker 2: eight and was very moved. I really love that you

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Speaker 2: both share real life stories about what you're dealing with

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Speaker 2: that we can all relate to. It helps putting the

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Speaker 2: teachings into practice so that I don't feel like the

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Speaker 2: bad parent who got it wrong. It helps me to

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Speaker 2: feel normal. And added bonus is that my husband loves

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Speaker 2: the podcast. That is a huge plus and I can

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Speaker 2: see it's giving him better ideas for parenting as well

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Speaker 2: as our marriage. I think he was tired of hearing

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Speaker 2: it from me all the time and appreciates hearing doctor

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Speaker 2: Justin's point of view. Thank you, Hey.

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Speaker 3: Isn't that great for two reasons.

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Speaker 4: First of all, you're the one that always gets the praise,

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Speaker 4: but we just love we love that what we do

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Speaker 4: in this podcast helps families be happier. So thank you

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Speaker 4: l Bin Germany or LB in Germany, depending one. I

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Speaker 4: think you're right LB in Germany for that five star rating.

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Speaker 4: We got some feedback as well via podcasts that's podcasts

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Speaker 4: with an s podcasts at happy Families dot com dot

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Speaker 4: au from somebody who wanted to remain anonymous, but they said, so,

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Speaker 4: you remember the other day we were talking about getting

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Speaker 4: your kids to sleep and how hard it can be

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Speaker 4: to get them to sleep and the torturous challenge of

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Speaker 4: being woken up in the middle of the night again

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Speaker 4: and again and again. In fact, we got quite a

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Speaker 4: bit of feedback from that one. But somebody sent through

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Speaker 4: a clip from the Australian cartoon show.

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Speaker 3: Called Bluey and Our Kids.

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Speaker 4: We don't really watch a whole lot of blue but

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Speaker 4: everybody loves it and every time I've watched one, it's

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Speaker 4: just been beautiful. But this person said that sleep podcast

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Speaker 4: reminded me of the Bluey Sleeping cartoon episode, so we're

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Speaker 4: going to link to that in the show notes because

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Speaker 4: you haven't seen it yet.

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Speaker 3: But I spent seven and.

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Speaker 4: A half minutes, and that's all it is, seven and

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Speaker 4: a half minutes watching.

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Speaker 3: It, and it was just so good.

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Speaker 4: It was brilliant about his Bluey and Bingo, the two

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Speaker 4: little baby dogs, and they're getting up for a cup

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Speaker 4: of water and they're having nightmares and they're kicking the

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Speaker 4: parents out of the bed and they're going to the toilet,

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Speaker 4: and it was just so beautifully done. And it was

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Speaker 4: also heartwarming as well, and it made me think, I

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Speaker 4: hope that we got the balance right when we talked

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Speaker 4: about it, because it's such a beautiful thing to be

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Speaker 4: able to sleep with your kids and hold them close,

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Speaker 4: but it's also such a torturous experience and so much

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Speaker 4: of it comes down to mindset. And I just love

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Speaker 4: that Blewy's parents are so service oriented and so willing

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Speaker 4: to do what it takes for their kids. So that

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Speaker 4: was that we got to do old Do Better Tomorrow,

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Speaker 4: which is our favorite segment of the week, and obviously

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Speaker 4: LB in Germany likes it as well. Well.

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Speaker 2: It's funny because the episode that she actually referred to,

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Speaker 2: I was going to refer to today based on my

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Speaker 2: little experience, so that was a really nice little tie

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Speaker 2: in there.

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Speaker 4: So episode two eight we'll link to that as well

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Speaker 4: for people who have missed it. So I'm going to

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Speaker 4: go first today because well, I know what you're going

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Speaker 4: to share, I know what you're going to talk about,

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Speaker 4: and I think that that should be what we leave

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Speaker 4: people with. But I just want to do a really

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Speaker 4: short I'll do Better Tomorrow because, by the way, for

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Speaker 4: those of you who are new, I'll Do Better Tomorrow

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Speaker 4: is basically.

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Speaker 3: Every Friday we reflect on the week.

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Speaker 4: We look for parenting insights, wins, losses, challenges, up evils,

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Speaker 4: dramas and even the good things because it's this is

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Speaker 4: the sort of stuff that helps us to be better

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Speaker 4: parents more intentional. A couple of weeks ago, we went

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Speaker 4: away as a couple. We had your mum and dad

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Speaker 4: look after the kids and we had a couple of

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Speaker 4: nights away where we got to breathe and relax and

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Speaker 4: recalibrate and reorient ourselves so that we can be better parents.

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Speaker 4: And one of the things that we talked about was

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Speaker 4: getting the routine.

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Speaker 3: Back on track.

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Speaker 4: And one of my favorite things that I've done over

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Speaker 4: the years, and something that the kids love, is something

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Speaker 4: that I haven't done for a while, and that's daddy

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Speaker 4: daughter dates.

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Speaker 2: The kids love those.

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Speaker 3: The kids love them, and so last.

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Speaker 2: I also love dubbing you in because you get them

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Speaker 2: things that you wouldn't normally get them, like McDonald's ice creams.

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Speaker 3: I've got gosh, you weren't supposed to know about that.

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Speaker 4: So we're trying really hard to not eat any process

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Speaker 4: sugary junk and every now and again, why the six.

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Speaker 2: Year old doesn't have any problems letting me know.

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Speaker 4: Every now and again I buy a yuck Donald's ice

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Speaker 4: cream or something like that. Anyway, so last week I

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Speaker 4: took the ten year old out and we had a

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Speaker 4: daddy daughter date. Took it to a cafe, had breakfast,

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Speaker 4: she ordered just an amazing burger, and then we just

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Speaker 4: kind of hung out for about an hour hour and

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Speaker 4: a half, pretty cheap, pretty low key, didn't actually quote

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Speaker 4: unquote do anything other than have breakfast together and then

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Speaker 4: go and run a couple of errands. We went and

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Speaker 4: recycled the aluminium cans that she collects, all the bottles

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Speaker 4: and cans. But just connecting with her on that one

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Speaker 4: on one level, having that time and listening to her

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Speaker 4: and getting to see her heart and listen to her

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Speaker 4: tell me about her life, it was just brilliant and beautiful.

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Speaker 3: I was like, yeah, Okay, this is what it's about.

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Speaker 3: I'm getting it.

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Speaker 4: Right, which is great because the last few weeks I've

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Speaker 4: shared how I've been getting it wrong a fair bit,

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Speaker 4: and I thought, I've got to share this on I'll

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Speaker 4: do better tomorrow. Because for any parent who's having a

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Speaker 4: hard time with their kids, regardless of whether they're three

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Speaker 4: years old or ten years old or sixteen years old,

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Speaker 4: taking some time out doing something a bit out of

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Speaker 4: the ordinary and just having a date with no agenda

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Speaker 4: makes such a difference.

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Speaker 2: What I love about those experiences that you have with

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Speaker 2: the girls is I just I notice a real change

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Speaker 2: in them as they walk through the door. And for

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Speaker 2: our ten year old, she kind of just stood a

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Speaker 2: little taller that day, and the way she spoke to

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Speaker 2: me there was just there was a confidence in her

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Speaker 2: voice that I hadn't noticed, you know, kind of in

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Speaker 2: recent times. So I really love just how much this

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Speaker 2: experience lifts and edifies our children.

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Speaker 4: And something really funny happened that night as well, because

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Speaker 4: her big sister, her thirteen year old sister, had an

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Speaker 4: opportunity of privilege on Saturday night, and she started to

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Speaker 4: go oh, and then she stopped herself and out loud,

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Speaker 4: she said, I was going to complain about that not

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Speaker 4: being fair, but I've had a pretty good day. I

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Speaker 4: got to have a daddy daughter date with Dad this morning,

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Speaker 4: and then Mum took me down to Kmart to buy

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Speaker 4: some stuff this afternoon, So I'm not going to complain.

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Speaker 3: And if you want to go and do that, then

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Speaker 3: you just do it. I was like, winning, Wow, where

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Speaker 3: did that come from?

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Speaker 4: Anyway, I can't wait to hear yours because yours is

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Speaker 4: an absolute cracker.

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Speaker 1: That's coming up next, it's the Happy Families podcast.

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Speaker 5: Imagine a Home. We're discipl got results without anyone having

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Speaker 5: to feel bad or in trouble. The do's and donts

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Speaker 5: of discipline as a webinar to help parents set limits

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Speaker 5: with love, compassion, and humanity. Find it now at happyfamilies

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Speaker 5: dot com dot au slash shop.

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Speaker 2: It's the Happy Families podcast, the podcast for the time

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Speaker 2: poor parent who just wants answers now, and today we

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Speaker 2: are talking about our favorite thing. We love, dissecting and

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Speaker 2: you know, really just taking apart our week and being

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Speaker 2: able to share the insights that we have as parents.

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Speaker 3: And this week we're sharing good stuff.

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Speaker 4: Every now and again we talk about how we totally

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Speaker 4: get it wrong, and we get so much feedback from

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Speaker 4: people who appreciate that we get it wrong or we're

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Speaker 4: upfront about it. But this week winning, winning all the way.

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Speaker 4: So I've had my daddy daughter. To date, we've got

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Speaker 4: a happy ten year old tell us about your older

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Speaker 4: better tomorrow with our six year old Emily.

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Speaker 2: Well, it was great the feedback that we got from

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Speaker 2: LB in Germany. She talked about episode two, one hundred

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Speaker 2: and eight, and that was actually what I was going

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Speaker 2: to refer back to because in that episode we talked

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Speaker 2: about just some of the challenges we've been having with

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Speaker 2: Miss SIGs. Miss Emily. She has really just been pushing

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Speaker 2: the boundaries a lot lately, and I've been really really

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Speaker 2: struggling with it because she's such a beautiful child, but

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Speaker 2: she's very strong will, she's very independent, and she really

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Speaker 2: really just wants to do life her way, and so

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Speaker 2: trying to work with that can be a little bit

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Speaker 2: challenging at times. And so in that episode, we just

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Speaker 2: talked about the fact that we kind of went back

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Speaker 2: to some basics and we reassessed the routine and you know,

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Speaker 2: kind of checked in with her and those checkpoints to

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Speaker 2: help her understand and know what was going to be.

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Speaker 3: Expected of her.

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Speaker 2: But over the last few weeks, we've seen incremental changes

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Speaker 2: in her as she has just taken on board the

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Speaker 2: things that we've talked about and discussed, and I've had

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Speaker 2: some major wins.

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Speaker 4: Well, I was going to say, you're saying incremental changes,

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Speaker 4: and they have been. But then a switch was flicked

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Speaker 4: about a week ago, just something happened and she became

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Speaker 4: literally we actually were joking around in the house and saying,

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Speaker 4: we've got a brand new Emily.

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Speaker 3: Where's the old Emily gone? Where's the new Emily?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, Yeah, it's been it's been crazy. And so about

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Speaker 2: a week ago, I was having a conversation with her,

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Speaker 2: and she said, Mommy, I love you so much. And

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Speaker 2: I looked at her and I said, do you know

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Speaker 2: how I know that you love me? She said, because

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Speaker 2: I told you. And I said, well, that's one way,

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Speaker 2: I said, but the real way that I know that

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Speaker 2: you love me is because you show me. And over

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Speaker 2: the last few days you have actually been showing me

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Speaker 2: as you've listened to my requests to do the things

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Speaker 2: that I've asked you to do, that you love me.

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Speaker 2: And she kind of said, ah, she kind of took

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Speaker 2: that in. And then the other night, as we were

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Speaker 2: having a snuggle in bed, I was talking to her

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Speaker 2: about these changes that I'd noticed in her, and I said,

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Speaker 2: you know, there's been some really big changes, like so

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Speaker 2: much so I don't even know where the old Emily's gone.

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Speaker 2: She's not here anymore. And I said, and I am

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Speaker 2: loving this new Emily. And Emily said to me, she said,

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Speaker 2: I know, I know you do, mom, with this big smile.

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Speaker 2: And I said, do you know what's changed? And she

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Speaker 2: looked at me as only a little six year old can,

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Speaker 2: and she said, Mummy, I changed my heart. And I

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Speaker 2: just was overwhelmed with how much a little six year

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Speaker 2: old kind of gets it, really gets it. And I

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Speaker 2: said to her, I said, how did what did you

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Speaker 2: change in your heart? And she looked at me again

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Speaker 2: with this en gorgeous little smile, and she said, I

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Speaker 2: changed everything. And as I sat there in that little

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Speaker 2: dark space and cuddled up to my six year old,

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Speaker 2: I was so grateful for her heart and her recognition

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Speaker 2: that we can change it and it makes all the difference.

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Speaker 4: I love how kids teach us. I'm so glad you

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Speaker 4: shared that I'll do better tomorrow. Is well, there's a

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Speaker 4: reason it's everyone's favorite. And if you're struggling in your

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Speaker 4: family and things just aren't quite right, maybe that's so

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Speaker 4: great advice for a six year old. If we can

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Speaker 4: change our heart, if we can change everything in our heart,

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Speaker 4: maybe we.

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Speaker 3: Can just make our families happier. What a great story.

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Speaker 3: Thank you.

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Speaker 4: We hope that you've enjoyed the podcast. If you do,

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Speaker 4: please tell your friends maybe share this episode. All you

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Speaker 4: need to do is click on those three little buttons

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Speaker 4: in the podcast and click share. You can send it

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Speaker 4: along to somebody and say, hey, this was awesome. I

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Speaker 4: hope you can listen to it and love it. We

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Speaker 4: hope the take home message gets through that we can

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Speaker 4: change our hearts and that we can have dates with

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Speaker 4: our kids as well. And maybe you can do what

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Speaker 4: LB in Germany did and leave us a rating and review.

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Speaker 4: Those five star ratings and reviews help other people to

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Speaker 4: find out about the podcast to make their family happier.

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Speaker 4: As always, we really appreciate Jr. Justin Roland from Bridge

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Speaker 4: Media for making the podcast sound great. He's our producer

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Speaker 4: and our executive producer is Craig Bruce. If you would

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Speaker 4: like more information about making your family happier, even if

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Speaker 4: it means you sit in sit ups at one another

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Speaker 4: and cry about how happy your family it can be

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Speaker 4: from time to time, please visit happy families.

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Speaker 3: Dot com dot a. You we've got all the information

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Speaker 3: you need about our memberships.

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Speaker 4: About the books, about all of the various products, and

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Speaker 4: even the free stuff that we do to help you

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Speaker 4: to make your family happier.

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Speaker 3: Happy families dot com dot au