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Speaker 1: Ashton. Would you believe that our guest today became a

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Speaker 1: granddad at thirty seven years of age, So.

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Speaker 2: He's a doting granddad.

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Speaker 1: He's a doting granddad.

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Speaker 2: One of my first ever, first ever wow.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, Maddie Actin. You may know him from Radio B

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Speaker 1: one oh five from Brisbane. I grew up in Brisbane

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Speaker 1: as so B one oh five, what I would say

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Speaker 1: is the best station for radio up there in bris Vegas.

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Speaker 3: And he is a three time dad and a granddad,

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Speaker 3: so in.

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Speaker 1: The hierarchy of dads, he's way up there. Mad Yeah,

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Speaker 1: he shits on us.

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Speaker 3: So eldest right twenty three, the next one eleven year

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Speaker 3: old Xander and eight year old Eden. He definitely has

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Speaker 3: a lot more experience than you and I put together.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. He became a dad at the age of eighteen

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Speaker 1: when he got together with his his now wife. So

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Speaker 1: he talks about unexpectedly becoming a father at such a

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Speaker 1: young age.

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Speaker 3: Prefabricated family Matthew, if you will, And he talks a

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Speaker 3: lot about the teenage years in this episode, which I

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Speaker 3: am petrified of.

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Speaker 4: I wasn't until this episode.

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Speaker 1: So I thought parenting was hard now, but it turns

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Speaker 1: out the older they get, the bigger the problems are.

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Speaker 1: I can't wait.

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Speaker 3: It gets real awkward, real quick when they're teenagers.

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Speaker 1: I know, I can't imagine trying to have a sexual

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Speaker 1: education type conversation with any of my children, but I

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Speaker 1: know it's coming.

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Speaker 2: I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I don't know if Maddie, well, you'd be the decider

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Speaker 1: if he did it the right way the wrong way.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, you have to listen to find out. Let's get

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Speaker 3: into it.

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Speaker 1: Welcome back to I'm going to say, two doting dads

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Speaker 1: and one doting granddad, but you're also a dad obviously. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I'm Maddi j I'm Ash.

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Speaker 2: And I'm Maddie Acton.

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Speaker 1: Grandfather. Can you give us like your old man impression?

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Speaker 2: I can give him my dad voice that I go

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Speaker 2: to and I am Madiactu.

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Speaker 1: I love the lip quiver as well.

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Speaker 2: I left a couple swear what do I feel like?

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Speaker 1: I need to clean my room down now? And this

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Speaker 1: is a podcast all about parenting. It is the good, it.

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Speaker 2: Is the bad and the relatable.

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Speaker 1: Now, Maddie, we don't give advice, but if you would

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Speaker 1: like to please go for it.

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Speaker 2: I can tell you what not to do. How about that?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, which is That's definitely the way we approach this conversation.

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Speaker 2: I thought you were going to say, this is the

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Speaker 2: podcast all about grandparenting.

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Speaker 1: Actually the very first time. Have we never had a grandparent?

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Speaker 1: Maybe we have. I'm going to call it first granddad. Yeap,

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Speaker 1: let's just look it in. We could be here debating

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Speaker 1: on it being here, Maddie. We always start the conversation

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Speaker 1: with the simple question, Yes, Maddie, acton.

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Speaker 4: Do you recall the most trouble you got in as

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Speaker 4: a child. Oh?

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Speaker 2: Yes, and I had to rat on myself, which made

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Speaker 2: it the hardest.

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Speaker 1: Do tell.

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Speaker 2: I was at a teenage party, would have been about

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Speaker 2: fifteen or sixteen at the time. Backpack of udls, as

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Speaker 2: you do rolling around town.

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Speaker 1: Particular flavor or was it the mixed pack?

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Speaker 2: I think they were the great flavored ones that I

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Speaker 2: went with.

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Speaker 1: I'm a pineapple king of I'm more of a red

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Speaker 1: Bear sor to guy, the cheap option.

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Speaker 2: I don't have to point that out. I remember the

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Speaker 2: Red Bears. You would get a ten pack for twenty bucks. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: the good old days. Drink them in a tent somewhere

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Speaker 2: in the bush. Yeah. So we were going between I

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Speaker 2: think a mate's house at a party, and I needed

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Speaker 2: to go to the toilet, so I was relieving myself

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Speaker 2: in a park.

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Speaker 1: Number one and number two?

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Speaker 2: Number one?

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Speaker 1: Number two, Yeah, I have a few more questions.

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Speaker 2: If it was number two, I hadn't drunk the whole

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Speaker 2: backpacks worth yet, so that's probably why I got that

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Speaker 2: got to that point, and so the police saw me

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Speaker 2: doing what I was doing, and they pull over, of course,

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Speaker 2: and it's me and my friend to you know, fifteen

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Speaker 2: year old's what's in the bag? Thing off? For some

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Speaker 2: they checked a bag, find the booze? Get done for

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Speaker 2: public urination?

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Speaker 1: See can they did.

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Speaker 4: They ask you to put your cock away before or

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Speaker 4: after asking what's in the bag?

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Speaker 2: I think I just saw the lights come on. I

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Speaker 2: quickly flicked it in.

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Speaker 1: If you were being really clever here, you have said

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Speaker 1: you can't search me. Could you have said that? Obviously,

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Speaker 1: when you're a kids, cops can say anything and you'll

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Speaker 1: do it because you're just scared.

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Speaker 2: Is that because you're underaged and I'm how to search

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Speaker 2: you without a parent? There? Yeah? But maybe that's you

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Speaker 2: not a bag in particular.

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Speaker 1: Unless you were winging in public, which is a crime.

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Speaker 2: I grew up in central Queensland, so I don't think

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Speaker 2: they give a shit in places.

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Speaker 1: Gives bash you. There's no witnesses up there.

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Speaker 2: So they're about to put me in the back of

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Speaker 2: the car and take me to the police station and

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Speaker 2: bring my parents and be like, hey, we've got your kids.

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Speaker 1: I thought they'd just do the poor out.

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Speaker 2: No, they weren't too happy with me. But then, of

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Speaker 2: course I had a meat head friend who was with me,

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Speaker 2: and he decided that he would step in and come

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Speaker 2: to my aid.

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Speaker 1: Nice of him.

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Speaker 2: He got a little over aggressive. He got put in

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Speaker 2: handcuffs and there I am just like what is going on?

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Speaker 2: He gets thrown in the back of the car and

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Speaker 2: they say to me, right, you go home. They already

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Speaker 2: taken my details at this point. You go home. We've

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Speaker 2: got your details. If we don't see you at the

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Speaker 2: police station with one of your parents on Monday, we'll

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Speaker 2: ring them.

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Speaker 4: Oh god, that's I don't know whether that's an empty

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Speaker 4: threat from them, But you don't you don't want to,

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Speaker 4: you don't want to find out.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, this was Saturday night. I spent all of Sunday

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Speaker 2: just contemplating do I tell them, do I like run

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Speaker 2: the gauntlet?

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Speaker 5: Here?

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Speaker 2: And see what happens? Do I what do I do?

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Speaker 2: The only silver lining was in all of the commotion,

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Speaker 2: they forgot to take the backpack off me. So I

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Speaker 2: kept making so I still had the booze. So I

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Speaker 2: continued on to the party. My mate was like, where's Timmy?

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Speaker 1: You would not believe what happened.

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Speaker 2: I convinced my sister was eighteen at the time, because

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Speaker 2: she's a couple of years older than me. So I

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Speaker 2: convinced my sister to come and cover for me. And

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Speaker 2: then I just got the guilts in the end that

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Speaker 2: I was like, well, I'm going to be in trouble.

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Speaker 2: Let's just rip the band aid off. I told my

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Speaker 2: mom my mom had to take me to the police

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Speaker 2: state and they who are you? Yeah, you're doing it

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Speaker 2: well that they remember. They were like, oh, yeah, we

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Speaker 2: have your name down here, but I don't think they

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Speaker 2: were going to call because they didn't seem too concerned.

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Speaker 2: Your mates in the background, like, oh, so I get there.

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Speaker 2: This is like a Monday or a Tuesday. We go in,

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Speaker 2: they go all right, we're going to separate you. They

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Speaker 2: put me in like a question room, you know, like

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Speaker 2: where they take people who have committed like murders and stuff.

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Speaker 2: They started to terrogating them. They take my mom out,

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Speaker 2: and I'm like, what is going on? Like they're going

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Speaker 2: to come back here, I'm going to be in dead.

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Speaker 2: My mum walks in, sits down beside me, and then

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Speaker 2: the cop goes, all right, tell you what what happened. Now,

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Speaker 2: I've already told her, so I told her everything. So

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Speaker 2: I'm really sorry. Blah blah blah, I'll never do it again.

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Speaker 2: Did it the next week?

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Speaker 1: I already had a six pack.

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Speaker 2: Let me tell you something, And they were like, fine,

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Speaker 2: you get a warning, you're free to go. It was

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Speaker 2: until I got in the car my mum had said

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Speaker 2: that the police officer said, look, it's good he's come

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Speaker 2: down here. If he's a smart ass, when we get

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Speaker 2: into the room, we're gonna he's gonna be in huge trouble.

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Speaker 2: But if he just did, you know, it's cool about it.

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Speaker 2: He'll be sweet. So I got off luckily.

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Speaker 1: What about at home?

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Speaker 4: Did you get any punishment at home? Or they thought

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Speaker 4: that was punishment and ars No, I.

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Speaker 2: Think they thought it was punishment.

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Speaker 1: And so I love how parents in the cops, they're

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Speaker 1: working together.

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Speaker 4: When do we get the call up from the cops

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Speaker 4: and be like, hey you, so you know we've got

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Speaker 4: your bat when.

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Speaker 1: I'm waiting for it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't know. But see the thing I didn't.

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Speaker 2: I think the reason I didn't get in trouble was

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Speaker 2: because I didn't tell the cops. It was my mum

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Speaker 2: who bought me the udls.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, your mum was like, don't you Yeah.

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Speaker 2: So I think I had a little bit of leveryge

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Speaker 2: to bend over a barrel because that's actually illegal.

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Speaker 1: Your mom's sweating, don't utew did you mind leaving the

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Speaker 1: room while we talked to your mum? I'm really quick.

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Speaker 2: That's probably the worst. Yeah, that'd be the worst situation.

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Speaker 1: That's pretty bad, Maddie. I've known you for a little while. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: we spoke many many years ago when I was on

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Speaker 1: a little show called The Bachelor. And I mean, this

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Speaker 1: is a compliment. You've always had such a fresh face.

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Speaker 2: Thank you.

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Speaker 1: You've always looked.

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Speaker 2: I'm seventy eight and I remember finding out that you

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Speaker 2: were a dad and I was like, but he's very young.

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Speaker 1: How does that work? Did you always want to be

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Speaker 1: a young dad? Was that ever on your radar? Did

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Speaker 1: you want to be a father?

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Speaker 2: I'd never really thought about it before. When I obviously,

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Speaker 2: I became a dad very young. I was eighteen, But

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Speaker 2: it kind of happened quickly because when I met my wife,

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Speaker 2: she was twenty two when I was eighteen.

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Speaker 1: Where did you meet?

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Speaker 2: Into Woomba little town west Queensland. I'd moved there by

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Speaker 2: the way, great spot I've never been.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, good Rugby school.

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Speaker 2: The cops like up there. Well, let me tell you

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Speaker 2: a story. So I moved there. I was fresh out

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Speaker 2: of high school. So it's my first ever radio gig,

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Speaker 2: like full time radio gig. And I went off in

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Speaker 2: my Ford Laser with my TV and my Donner like

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Speaker 2: look at me, man, I'm taken on the world, ready

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Speaker 2: to roll. And I moved there. We met, we were

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Speaker 2: only ever, just sort of meant to be a bit

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Speaker 2: of fun, as you are when you're a bit younger.

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Speaker 2: But she had a three year old son, already prefab family. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: so when we met, he was three and I kind

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Speaker 2: of was just dating his mum obviously, and we didn't

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Speaker 2: expect it to really go anywhere. And then next thing,

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Speaker 2: I found myself in love with this girl who had

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Speaker 2: a child. And what did you.

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Speaker 1: Make of the fact that she already had a child.

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Speaker 1: We were like, oh, it's a non event because it's

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Speaker 1: not going to be anything serious.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, at the start totally. So I met her through

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Speaker 2: my flatmate. She was really good friends with a girl

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Speaker 2: who I was flatting with, and we were very from

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Speaker 2: the start, very much like this is this is just fun,

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Speaker 2: this is not serious. I think she was kind of like,

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Speaker 2: obviously you're not going to want this, and I was

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Speaker 2: not in the market for that either. Yeah, and then yeah,

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Speaker 2: we just found ourselves. It just kept on progressing and

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Speaker 2: progressing until I was like, oh shit, here we are.

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Speaker 2: So yeah.

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Speaker 4: Can I ask you how long it was before you

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Speaker 4: met your son?

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Speaker 2: Would have been probably four months after we dated. It

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Speaker 2: was quite like a little bit of time. But it

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Speaker 2: wasn't until we'd had the con sation, like we said,

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Speaker 2: let's try and make a go of it, you know

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Speaker 2: what I mean. When it wasn't until I guess you

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Speaker 2: have the are we together conversation? Yeah there's more to

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Speaker 2: this than just casual. Yeah. But even then, esther very

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Speaker 2: much was kind of like separated our relationship and what

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Speaker 2: I guess my relationship with Ethan was at the time,

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Speaker 2: because she was never like oh, you have to be

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Speaker 2: a father figure. You know, she already had her dad

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Speaker 2: and her brother and a lot of you know, great

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Speaker 2: men in her life who were feeling that sort of void,

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Speaker 2: and so she was never like, you know, if you're

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Speaker 2: with me, you've got to remember this is what you've

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Speaker 2: got to be, or anything like that. So it kind

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Speaker 2: of my relationship with him.

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Speaker 1: Where was your mindset at Were you like, yeah, cool,

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Speaker 1: like you know, I'll meet the little guy and I'll

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Speaker 1: see what he's like. Or when you met him, do

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Speaker 1: you think, oh, I've got to step up to the

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Speaker 1: plate now.

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Speaker 2: No, I didn't. I don't know. I kind of for

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Speaker 2: a long time just treated him like a friend, yeah,

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Speaker 2: if that makes sense, Yeah, like.

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Speaker 1: An uncle type, I guess.

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Speaker 2: So. Yeah, Like he used to always call me mum's

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Speaker 2: friend to people, like not like mum's boyfriend or anything

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Speaker 2: like like, oh, Matt's mum's friend sort of thing. And

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Speaker 2: I remember the first time I met him, like she

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Speaker 2: picked him up from her parents' place because they were babysitting.

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Speaker 2: He gets into the back of the car and I

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Speaker 2: was like, oh hey, and he just kind of looked

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Speaker 2: at me and looked at his mum goes who's your friend?

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Speaker 2: Who's this guy? What the hell? So that was my

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Speaker 2: main goal at the start, was just to I think,

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Speaker 2: just befriend him and have that kind of relationship. Obviously,

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Speaker 2: once you've been together a long time, you do move

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Speaker 2: into the fathering role a bit more so. He never

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Speaker 2: really started calling me dad for quite a few years

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Speaker 2: into our relationship.

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Speaker 4: Being so young, going from you were trying to just

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Speaker 4: befriend really this child, how was your transition from friend to.

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Speaker 2: Into that father fit? Because I mean it's sort of

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Speaker 2: a really blurred line, and there's.

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Speaker 4: No set like, Okay, well now I'm going to be

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Speaker 4: you know, from Monday.

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Speaker 2: And it's true. I think Estra and I had a

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Speaker 2: lot of conversations about it because I wanted to also

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Speaker 2: make sure, you know, she had raised him up until

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Speaker 2: this point and she was his mum, Like how much

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Speaker 2: did she want me to parent? How much did she

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Speaker 2: want me to be involved in the fact of like,

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Speaker 2: you know, can I call her out on stuff if

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Speaker 2: I do something that's parenting? Is she allowed to say

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Speaker 2: to me, I don't like the way you do that.

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Speaker 2: It can get tricky. So many blurred line.

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Speaker 1: How did you figure that out? Was it fluid or

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Speaker 1: did you guys have to sit down and talk about it.

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Speaker 2: We did have a lot of conversations about it, but

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Speaker 2: mainly I think Esther was brilliant in it that she

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Speaker 2: let the rains go and let me kind of figure

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Speaker 2: it out the way I wanted to. I can remember

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Speaker 2: the very first time. I think I first sort of

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Speaker 2: stepped in as the dad sort of roll what happened,

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Speaker 2: and then I freaked out, like she was going to

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Speaker 2: get up.

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Speaker 1: Like, oh, I crossed the line.

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Speaker 2: So she was putting him into a car seat and

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Speaker 2: he was, you know, cracking a nana as they do,

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Speaker 2: and I remember I was in the driver's seat looking

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Speaker 2: over and he had hit her on the back, just

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Speaker 2: you know, like a four year old throwing a bit

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Speaker 2: of a tantrum. And I remember like I just turned

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Speaker 2: around and blew my nana aut him, and I was like,

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Speaker 2: you do not hit your mom, and you do not

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Speaker 2: hit people. And then I just it just came out,

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Speaker 2: and then she kind of looked up, and I looked

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Speaker 2: up and I was like, I'm sorry, am I in

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Speaker 2: traveling now another? And she didn't say anything, and then

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Speaker 2: so we kind of just went on, and then later

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Speaker 2: we talked about it and I was like, oh, look

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Speaker 2: at a cross the line and she's like, absolutely not.

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Speaker 2: How did he take that. It's the first time I

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Speaker 2: yelled at him, so even he was like, oh shit, yeah,

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Speaker 2: maybe he's not just my friend.

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Speaker 1: It was an awkward car rider.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, any should we drove all the way to Sydney.

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Speaker 1: Remember the first time that he called you dad?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, because we had had the conversation with him and said,

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Speaker 2: if that's something that you want to do, really yeah,

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Speaker 2: So it wasn't it. We've gotten engaged. So we've been

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Speaker 2: together a long time, like six years, and we actually

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Speaker 2: had the conversation Estherra and I talked about it and

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Speaker 2: I said to her, look, if that's what he would

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Speaker 2: like to do, I'm totally open to that. So if

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Speaker 2: he says no, that's totally fine as well a little

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Speaker 2: bit homeful, Oh, totally fine, that kid, no, because it

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Speaker 2: was kind of at the point explaining our dynamic to people,

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Speaker 2: to be like, I've been the only father figure he's

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Speaker 2: ever had. We've been together all this time, having to

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Speaker 2: just explain, oh, well, we're mad and we did this

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Speaker 2: and we did dad, which you have to do anyway

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Speaker 2: because of the massive age gap, but it just seemed

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Speaker 2: easier to have a label on the situation. So we

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Speaker 2: had that conversation and yeah, it just sort of started

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Speaker 2: calling me dad. Do you remember how it made you feel? Oh?

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Speaker 2: I was like like hit me in the fields hard,

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Speaker 2: you know, and even now like Ethant, like I cried

348
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Speaker 2: everything that that all my kids do, but he makes

349
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Speaker 2: me cry all the time, like with what a great

350
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Speaker 2: kid is turned out to be. But it's pretty And

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Speaker 2: I said this in his speech at his wedding, you know,

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Speaker 2: it was it's really special. You're obviously when you help

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Speaker 2: birth a child. Well, I guess you did the ten

354
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Speaker 2: seconds of yeah. I was like, I was there, how

355
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Speaker 2: many people women listen to this.

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Speaker 1: Autrician? I was like, get on the way helps.

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Speaker 2: Sitting on the couch like, oh, hang on, do I

358
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Speaker 2: have to do it? Help conceive? I should say my

359
00:16:57,200 --> 00:17:02,840
Speaker 2: favorite part. You know you're automatically dad, I guess. But

360
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Speaker 2: if a kid has chosen to call you that, I

361
00:17:07,320 --> 00:17:12,159
Speaker 2: guess there's a proud feeling in going you've earned it, yeah,

362
00:17:12,240 --> 00:17:15,600
Speaker 2: you know, or that you have enough of their love

363
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Speaker 2: that that's I guess the category they want to put

364
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Speaker 2: you in.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I never thought of it from the perspective of

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Speaker 1: you've really got to earn that title. We just get

367
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Speaker 1: given it, Yeah, regardless of how good or bowbi Area's parents. Yeah,

368
00:17:28,240 --> 00:17:32,440
Speaker 1: so you don't appreciate the weight behind that simple term.

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Speaker 2: It's like when my kids call me by my first name,

370
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Speaker 2: I'm like, I earned that.

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Speaker 1: I farnt that.

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Speaker 2: There has been so much neglect to get called out.

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Speaker 4: You mentioned that you moved around a little bit, just

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Speaker 4: with what you do for work as well.

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Speaker 1: How did I mean for me?

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Speaker 4: My kid has moved six times in six years, not interstate,

377
00:17:51,760 --> 00:17:54,840
Speaker 4: but I did notice that on the sixth time it

378
00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:57,200
Speaker 4: was sort of becoming the norm for him.

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Speaker 1: How did the kids deal.

380
00:17:58,760 --> 00:18:00,600
Speaker 2: With that when you were moving a lot, Well, only

381
00:18:00,640 --> 00:18:04,239
Speaker 2: Ethan's had to deal with it. Our younger two have.

382
00:18:04,600 --> 00:18:07,320
Speaker 2: We've been in Brisbane for nine years now, so they've

383
00:18:07,440 --> 00:18:11,480
Speaker 2: pretty much established themselves there. But Ethie we moved every

384
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Speaker 2: two years. You know. We went Brisbane a Gold Coast

385
00:18:14,480 --> 00:18:16,040
Speaker 2: and that was he was only there for six months

386
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Speaker 2: because he was living in Brison with his mum, and

387
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Speaker 2: then we moved in together on the Gold Coast and

388
00:18:20,040 --> 00:18:24,080
Speaker 2: then we went Melbourne. We've been to Sydney back to

389
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Speaker 2: the Gold Coast, then Melbourne, back to Brisbane, like everywhere,

390
00:18:29,640 --> 00:18:31,920
Speaker 2: and he the same thing. It was all normal for him.

391
00:18:32,440 --> 00:18:35,280
Speaker 2: There was a couple of times when he'd really established himself,

392
00:18:35,520 --> 00:18:37,600
Speaker 2: especially here in Sydney. Had a good group of mates

393
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Speaker 2: because he was around that sort of nine ten years

394
00:18:40,520 --> 00:18:44,919
Speaker 2: old where they start to, I guess build who they

395
00:18:44,920 --> 00:18:47,480
Speaker 2: are as a person, a bit more, a bit more independence.

396
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Speaker 2: And he said, I can remember it broke my heart

397
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Speaker 2: when we said, oh, we're going to move back to Queensland.

398
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Speaker 2: He started crying and he goes, I knew this was

399
00:18:53,359 --> 00:18:56,919
Speaker 2: going to happen. Oh, so that kills you, you know.

400
00:18:57,320 --> 00:18:59,560
Speaker 2: But it was easier for him because all of our

401
00:18:59,600 --> 00:19:02,359
Speaker 2: family in Queensland, so you could kind of sell, well,

402
00:19:02,400 --> 00:19:05,240
Speaker 2: we're going back to Nanny and Poppy and Grandmara and

403
00:19:05,280 --> 00:19:07,120
Speaker 2: all the cousins and stuff, so that made it easier.

404
00:19:07,960 --> 00:19:11,720
Speaker 2: Then we moved to Melbourne when he was about twelve,

405
00:19:12,200 --> 00:19:13,919
Speaker 2: and that was a bit harder because he was starting

406
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Speaker 2: high school.

407
00:19:14,760 --> 00:19:17,359
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, that's when I yeah, that's when I relocated

408
00:19:17,400 --> 00:19:18,000
Speaker 4: to It's tough.

409
00:19:19,320 --> 00:19:22,439
Speaker 2: So he started that and then that was you know,

410
00:19:23,119 --> 00:19:24,879
Speaker 2: working through a lot of that was a bit tough.

411
00:19:25,480 --> 00:19:28,560
Speaker 2: Once again, he established himself and then we were like.

412
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Speaker 1: We're having the shoulder.

413
00:19:31,080 --> 00:19:33,119
Speaker 2: But that was back to Brisbane, which again was that

414
00:19:33,160 --> 00:19:36,240
Speaker 2: whole family thing that we could use, but we kind

415
00:19:36,240 --> 00:19:38,359
Speaker 2: of explained it to him in that position. We're in

416
00:19:38,400 --> 00:19:40,879
Speaker 2: a really weird one because we had Xander at the

417
00:19:40,920 --> 00:19:45,680
Speaker 2: time was two Esther was pregnant with Eden and he

418
00:19:45,800 --> 00:19:49,959
Speaker 2: was about to go into grade ten and if I

419
00:19:50,080 --> 00:19:52,840
Speaker 2: signed on in Melbourne again for another two or three years,

420
00:19:53,640 --> 00:19:56,800
Speaker 2: he would have been eighteen when that contract finished. So

421
00:19:57,480 --> 00:19:59,560
Speaker 2: we had to decide if we were going to move

422
00:19:59,560 --> 00:20:03,440
Speaker 2: back to and where we wanted to be, Like long term,

423
00:20:03,760 --> 00:20:05,960
Speaker 2: we were probably going to be leaving him behind in Melbourne.

424
00:20:06,280 --> 00:20:10,240
Speaker 2: Yeah wow, because he gets a girlfriend, gets a job.

425
00:20:10,160 --> 00:20:12,080
Speaker 1: He's an adult that moves out.

426
00:20:12,560 --> 00:20:15,800
Speaker 2: That's his life will be there and so we were like,

427
00:20:16,320 --> 00:20:17,879
Speaker 2: we want to keep him as close to us as

428
00:20:17,880 --> 00:20:19,720
Speaker 2: long as we can.

429
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Speaker 1: Yeah, story as a whole.

430
00:20:25,920 --> 00:20:28,199
Speaker 2: So yes, we had to make that. That was sort of

431
00:20:28,200 --> 00:20:29,440
Speaker 2: the decision on that.

432
00:20:29,720 --> 00:20:33,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's hardy. Do you remember how it was mentioning

433
00:20:33,240 --> 00:20:35,760
Speaker 1: to him that you're going to have more kids?

434
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Speaker 2: He was so ecstatic about it. Yeah, he was really excited.

435
00:20:40,040 --> 00:20:41,119
Speaker 1: So how old was he before?

436
00:20:41,200 --> 00:20:44,480
Speaker 2: When when you when he would have been twelve when

437
00:20:44,520 --> 00:20:48,119
Speaker 2: we fell pregnant with Xander. Yeah, so he'd had our

438
00:20:48,160 --> 00:20:50,200
Speaker 2: full attention for a long time. He was the only

439
00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:52,960
Speaker 2: grandchild for a long time as well. Yeah, now there's

440
00:20:53,000 --> 00:20:57,679
Speaker 2: like seven hundred of them. But he was he was

441
00:20:57,720 --> 00:21:00,000
Speaker 2: so ecstatic. I remember we took him to a scare

442
00:21:00,040 --> 00:21:03,240
Speaker 2: and that we had after we told him and we're

443
00:21:03,280 --> 00:21:06,120
Speaker 2: finding out the sex of the baby that day, and

444
00:21:06,200 --> 00:21:08,359
Speaker 2: he just couldn't sit still. And you know, I'm like, mate,

445
00:21:08,400 --> 00:21:10,960
Speaker 2: just sit still. He goes, you don't understand, this is

446
00:21:10,960 --> 00:21:12,199
Speaker 2: the best day of my life.

447
00:21:12,320 --> 00:21:13,280
Speaker 1: And wow.

448
00:21:13,520 --> 00:21:15,440
Speaker 2: So yeah, he was really excited.

449
00:21:15,560 --> 00:21:18,560
Speaker 1: It must be so wild to obviously those moments for

450
00:21:18,680 --> 00:21:20,680
Speaker 1: me have been with my wife, but to be able

451
00:21:20,680 --> 00:21:23,960
Speaker 1: to share that with another family member, I can't imagine it.

452
00:21:24,240 --> 00:21:26,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, especially a twelve year old boy.

453
00:21:26,320 --> 00:21:29,720
Speaker 4: And it's like for him to be excited, it must

454
00:21:29,720 --> 00:21:32,119
Speaker 4: have been really special because you could imagine that you

455
00:21:32,440 --> 00:21:33,639
Speaker 4: worried it might go the other way.

456
00:21:33,680 --> 00:21:36,560
Speaker 2: He's like, well, fuck, it's like, oh, my eleven year

457
00:21:36,560 --> 00:21:41,400
Speaker 2: old now would be like, oh, what you guys are disgusting.

458
00:21:41,440 --> 00:21:43,320
Speaker 2: I knew when you locked your door you were doing something.

459
00:21:43,880 --> 00:21:46,040
Speaker 2: I just knew it. You're not slick bro.

460
00:21:49,480 --> 00:21:51,560
Speaker 1: I've heard you speak before about the fact that one

461
00:21:51,600 --> 00:21:53,960
Speaker 1: of your kids is a non sleeper. Was Eeden the

462
00:21:54,080 --> 00:21:54,840
Speaker 1: non sleeper?

463
00:21:55,640 --> 00:21:56,080
Speaker 2: Oh?

464
00:21:56,200 --> 00:21:57,879
Speaker 1: Yeah, she was.

465
00:21:58,160 --> 00:22:01,080
Speaker 2: I love her to death, but she was a nightmare

466
00:22:01,160 --> 00:22:01,720
Speaker 2: of a baby.

467
00:22:01,800 --> 00:22:02,360
Speaker 1: What happened?

468
00:22:02,920 --> 00:22:04,879
Speaker 2: We don't even know, if I'm gonna be honest with you,

469
00:22:04,920 --> 00:22:07,639
Speaker 2: I don't even think the pediatrician knew. They were just

470
00:22:07,800 --> 00:22:10,720
Speaker 2: hoping to give us things to try seeing what it

471
00:22:10,720 --> 00:22:13,479
Speaker 2: would do. They think she had an acid reflux and

472
00:22:13,560 --> 00:22:16,479
Speaker 2: maybe colic, which I think if you read into it,

473
00:22:16,600 --> 00:22:17,119
Speaker 2: they like, I.

474
00:22:17,119 --> 00:22:21,480
Speaker 1: Feel like everyone was like Lola was then on sleep

475
00:22:21,520 --> 00:22:23,840
Speaker 1: and I feel like everyone's just like I was just colic.

476
00:22:26,200 --> 00:22:29,479
Speaker 2: Silent reflex, yes, right, And I think do they just

477
00:22:29,560 --> 00:22:31,000
Speaker 2: do you reckon? They just say that to be like, oh,

478
00:22:31,200 --> 00:22:31,879
Speaker 2: you've got a label.

479
00:22:32,359 --> 00:22:35,160
Speaker 1: I don't want to say, we don't know reflex.

480
00:22:35,280 --> 00:22:35,359
Speaker 2: No.

481
00:22:35,480 --> 00:22:39,439
Speaker 4: I remember vividly a nurse turning him on his side

482
00:22:39,480 --> 00:22:40,920
Speaker 4: to sleep, and he just went.

483
00:22:41,880 --> 00:22:45,879
Speaker 1: She was pinching him. She was silent, So that's what

484
00:22:45,880 --> 00:22:47,000
Speaker 1: it is on the side.

485
00:22:48,280 --> 00:22:52,280
Speaker 4: Child, and he went and it was like a silent

486
00:22:52,359 --> 00:22:55,679
Speaker 4: reflex on the esophagus is on a particular side. So

487
00:22:55,680 --> 00:22:57,919
Speaker 4: if you put them on the other side, get some

488
00:22:57,960 --> 00:23:00,120
Speaker 4: rest because obviously we're taught as new dad.

489
00:23:00,359 --> 00:23:03,000
Speaker 2: And your parents in general, kid goes on their back

490
00:23:03,119 --> 00:23:03,480
Speaker 2: of course.

491
00:23:03,560 --> 00:23:05,960
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, she put two towels and you slept like

492
00:23:05,960 --> 00:23:07,119
Speaker 4: an absolute dream.

493
00:23:07,160 --> 00:23:08,840
Speaker 2: But don't do this at home. You're not allowed to

494
00:23:08,880 --> 00:23:10,600
Speaker 2: do it at home. To do it here. But I

495
00:23:10,640 --> 00:23:13,800
Speaker 2: definitely did it. But I think as she got older,

496
00:23:13,960 --> 00:23:16,880
Speaker 2: we realized it was probably just her personality because she's

497
00:23:17,119 --> 00:23:22,200
Speaker 2: very specific in the things that she likes. So she's

498
00:23:22,359 --> 00:23:26,000
Speaker 2: very much like, has her matching outfits, has her places

499
00:23:26,000 --> 00:23:28,280
Speaker 2: things need to go. She has an idea in her

500
00:23:28,320 --> 00:23:30,439
Speaker 2: mind of how the day should be, and if it

501
00:23:30,520 --> 00:23:33,280
Speaker 2: changes slightly from that, it can really like derail her

502
00:23:33,760 --> 00:23:34,520
Speaker 2: from time to time.

503
00:23:34,600 --> 00:23:39,320
Speaker 1: You describe sounds like my wife, I'm sorry.

504
00:23:40,600 --> 00:23:44,919
Speaker 2: Definitely not my life. So it was it was really

505
00:23:44,960 --> 00:23:47,600
Speaker 2: tough because I was doing breakfast radio, so I was

506
00:23:47,640 --> 00:23:49,719
Speaker 2: getting up at three point thirty four in the morning,

507
00:23:50,400 --> 00:23:52,800
Speaker 2: and the only thing sometimes it would come her down

508
00:23:53,119 --> 00:23:55,520
Speaker 2: would be standing in the shower with her. And I

509
00:23:55,640 --> 00:23:58,600
Speaker 2: don't even know how it happened, whether I got up

510
00:23:58,600 --> 00:24:01,080
Speaker 2: to have a shower for work and I was like,

511
00:24:01,160 --> 00:24:03,520
Speaker 2: just give it to me, give it me. But there

512
00:24:03,520 --> 00:24:05,760
Speaker 2: were times at like two o'clock in the morning after

513
00:24:05,800 --> 00:24:07,840
Speaker 2: my wife hadn't slept a wink, and I'm like, I've

514
00:24:07,840 --> 00:24:09,440
Speaker 2: got to get up in two hours anyway, so I

515
00:24:09,480 --> 00:24:11,119
Speaker 2: might as well just get up, give me the baby.

516
00:24:11,160 --> 00:24:15,320
Speaker 2: And I drained that hot water. I just just took

517
00:24:15,359 --> 00:24:18,480
Speaker 2: every last drop of it just to keep her quiet.

518
00:24:19,040 --> 00:24:20,840
Speaker 2: Or you put her in the bath or like a

519
00:24:20,920 --> 00:24:23,560
Speaker 2: change of scenery. I don't really know what it was,

520
00:24:24,040 --> 00:24:25,879
Speaker 2: but yeah, would she just sleep.

521
00:24:25,640 --> 00:24:28,120
Speaker 1: On you, like in the shell, or she just has

522
00:24:28,320 --> 00:24:29,240
Speaker 1: just content.

523
00:24:29,200 --> 00:24:31,760
Speaker 2: Just content with the water sort of running over her.

524
00:24:31,960 --> 00:24:34,719
Speaker 2: It's weird. Yeah, yeah, I don't know what.

525
00:24:34,720 --> 00:24:36,919
Speaker 1: It's just a sensitive way of approaching that. Thank you.

526
00:24:38,280 --> 00:24:38,879
Speaker 1: I stand by it.

527
00:24:40,200 --> 00:24:43,600
Speaker 2: Super weird and so different because the two boys were like,

528
00:24:43,960 --> 00:24:46,000
Speaker 2: give them boob, give them food, they'll sleep.

529
00:24:46,119 --> 00:24:53,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's like me now, yea. But yeah, how was

530
00:24:53,720 --> 00:24:56,360
Speaker 1: it then with you and esther? Because I like you

531
00:24:56,359 --> 00:25:00,280
Speaker 1: were describing lolled to a tea right, And I remember

532
00:25:00,320 --> 00:25:03,000
Speaker 1: we used to get anxiety as a couple leading up

533
00:25:03,040 --> 00:25:06,000
Speaker 1: to six seven o'clock because we're just like, we're going

534
00:25:06,080 --> 00:25:08,560
Speaker 1: to just go through hell. It was like nighttime was

535
00:25:08,600 --> 00:25:11,560
Speaker 1: just harder and worse. And when you're working and you're

536
00:25:11,560 --> 00:25:14,119
Speaker 1: frustrated because you're tired and you you know, you just

537
00:25:14,320 --> 00:25:15,320
Speaker 1: take it out on each other.

538
00:25:16,240 --> 00:25:18,480
Speaker 2: Yeah. Look, we probably said some things we didn't really

539
00:25:18,520 --> 00:25:21,000
Speaker 2: mean it all sorts of times in the morning. I

540
00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:23,919
Speaker 2: don't know, man, it's like you're just in it and

541
00:25:23,960 --> 00:25:25,320
Speaker 2: you just think it's never going.

542
00:25:25,240 --> 00:25:27,760
Speaker 4: To end, right, Yeah, yeah, there's no you don't see

543
00:25:27,760 --> 00:25:30,080
Speaker 4: the light at the end of the tunnel like sometimes

544
00:25:30,119 --> 00:25:31,480
Speaker 4: you do and you're like, this is such a really

545
00:25:31,560 --> 00:25:32,000
Speaker 4: nice moment.

546
00:25:32,040 --> 00:25:33,840
Speaker 2: It can be like this all the time, of course,

547
00:25:34,400 --> 00:25:37,359
Speaker 2: but we kind of we just knew every night was

548
00:25:37,400 --> 00:25:40,520
Speaker 2: going to be a fight, you know, you just knew.

549
00:25:41,320 --> 00:25:44,239
Speaker 2: You do everything to plan properly, you think you were

550
00:25:44,280 --> 00:25:45,000
Speaker 2: going to be fine.

551
00:25:45,119 --> 00:25:48,400
Speaker 1: But so then did you reach out for help when

552
00:25:48,400 --> 00:25:49,879
Speaker 1: you guys were struggling with the sleep.

553
00:25:50,200 --> 00:25:51,919
Speaker 2: We went to the doctor a few times, and I

554
00:25:51,920 --> 00:25:54,359
Speaker 2: remember them when they said it was collic or reflux

555
00:25:54,440 --> 00:25:56,359
Speaker 2: or whatever. They gave us this medicine that had to

556
00:25:56,400 --> 00:25:58,760
Speaker 2: be compounded at the chemist, and I don't know, I

557
00:25:58,800 --> 00:26:02,160
Speaker 2: know exactly it probably have vile, yes, yeah, yeah, right,

558
00:26:02,240 --> 00:26:03,840
Speaker 2: And it was like when you say compounded as in

559
00:26:04,240 --> 00:26:07,160
Speaker 2: mixed or yeah, they make it there so you can't

560
00:26:07,240 --> 00:26:09,880
Speaker 2: it's not pre made you go to a special chemist

561
00:26:10,160 --> 00:26:12,920
Speaker 2: and they make it for you. Oh wow, Yeah, I'm

562
00:26:12,920 --> 00:26:15,320
Speaker 2: convinced it's just water. I thought so too, right, Yeah,

563
00:26:15,359 --> 00:26:16,920
Speaker 2: but I don't know if I told you the same thing.

564
00:26:16,960 --> 00:26:19,720
Speaker 2: The doctor was like, look, it may work, it may

565
00:26:19,840 --> 00:26:22,800
Speaker 2: not work. It takes like three months to start working.

566
00:26:23,200 --> 00:26:25,439
Speaker 2: So if you think it's working and you take them off,

567
00:26:25,480 --> 00:26:27,720
Speaker 2: it'll take another three months for it to start up again.

568
00:26:27,800 --> 00:26:29,639
Speaker 2: So you kind of just got to decide whether you

569
00:26:29,640 --> 00:26:30,879
Speaker 2: want to risk it or not. And I was like,

570
00:26:30,960 --> 00:26:34,200
Speaker 2: give me fifty fucking now.

571
00:26:36,320 --> 00:26:36,480
Speaker 4: Yeah.

572
00:26:36,560 --> 00:26:39,240
Speaker 2: I was like I don't care, give it to me.

573
00:26:39,320 --> 00:26:41,560
Speaker 4: But you're like, I don't know, I love that it

574
00:26:41,680 --> 00:26:43,800
Speaker 4: might or mind not where it's like science completely skip

575
00:26:43,880 --> 00:26:44,520
Speaker 4: this medication.

576
00:26:44,720 --> 00:26:46,080
Speaker 1: Is that at all?

577
00:26:46,160 --> 00:26:48,840
Speaker 2: It might not work. Yeah. It's also one thousand dollars

578
00:26:48,880 --> 00:26:51,640
Speaker 2: a meal, so keep it refrigerated.

579
00:26:52,080 --> 00:26:55,520
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, So did it make any difference?

580
00:26:55,680 --> 00:26:58,600
Speaker 2: I couldn't tell you. Yeah me either, No idea it

581
00:26:58,680 --> 00:27:01,000
Speaker 2: could have, but then again it couldn't. She's still on

582
00:27:01,040 --> 00:27:05,800
Speaker 2: it now and she's eight. It's great.

583
00:27:05,840 --> 00:27:07,840
Speaker 1: So when did you guys come out of those trenches?

584
00:27:08,400 --> 00:27:16,040
Speaker 2: I think probably around four long time. Look, it gradually

585
00:27:16,080 --> 00:27:20,800
Speaker 2: got better, but yeah, I think three to four is

586
00:27:20,840 --> 00:27:24,159
Speaker 2: when it just it got more consistent. She's a fabulous

587
00:27:24,200 --> 00:27:25,119
Speaker 2: sleep in our touch?

588
00:27:25,119 --> 00:27:27,320
Speaker 1: Would Lola put herself to sleep last night? She was,

589
00:27:28,640 --> 00:27:29,080
Speaker 1: it's weird.

590
00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:32,159
Speaker 2: She actually went to bed said I'm asleep. Was she?

591
00:27:32,280 --> 00:27:36,000
Speaker 1: I literally got pajamas on, was fapping around with the

592
00:27:36,000 --> 00:27:38,840
Speaker 1: book and the next thing looked down and she was asleep,

593
00:27:38,880 --> 00:27:40,560
Speaker 1: and Marley's like, where's my book? And I was like,

594
00:27:41,080 --> 00:27:43,960
Speaker 1: just the contrast if she you know, I was looking

595
00:27:44,000 --> 00:27:46,600
Speaker 1: at her asleep being like the pain you put me through,

596
00:27:47,080 --> 00:27:48,240
Speaker 1: that's what we were promised.

597
00:27:48,600 --> 00:27:51,160
Speaker 2: When did she kind of come out the other end?

598
00:27:51,720 --> 00:27:53,920
Speaker 1: I think it was around and it's all a blur.

599
00:27:54,200 --> 00:27:57,160
Speaker 1: I think the two year mark, Ryan, But yeah, we

600
00:27:57,280 --> 00:27:59,560
Speaker 1: used to put her in a cot in the hallway

601
00:28:00,200 --> 00:28:02,040
Speaker 1: so she was just as far away from all the

602
00:28:02,040 --> 00:28:05,520
Speaker 1: bedrooms as possible. Yeah, right, because she would just scream

603
00:28:05,600 --> 00:28:07,679
Speaker 1: from like sunset to sunrise.

604
00:28:07,880 --> 00:28:12,240
Speaker 4: It's so exhausting, isn't it, Like, and you said that before,

605
00:28:12,320 --> 00:28:14,159
Speaker 4: it's all a blur because your brain's like I.

606
00:28:14,160 --> 00:28:15,080
Speaker 2: Don't want to remember that.

607
00:28:15,280 --> 00:28:17,520
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, And like we were the same.

608
00:28:17,600 --> 00:28:19,400
Speaker 4: I think we were like one and a half two

609
00:28:19,400 --> 00:28:22,520
Speaker 4: when Oscar started to actually sleep, and you know, he

610
00:28:22,680 --> 00:28:25,119
Speaker 4: was such a cranky baby, which like we everyone hated

611
00:28:25,160 --> 00:28:27,720
Speaker 4: each other for so long. Yeah, and like you mentioned

612
00:28:27,720 --> 00:28:29,240
Speaker 4: about your daughter, now she's like such a.

613
00:28:29,480 --> 00:28:32,600
Speaker 1: Good sleeper and it's like, okay, you've had your torture.

614
00:28:33,320 --> 00:28:37,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, how are you going now with the new bub Yeah? Great?

615
00:28:38,160 --> 00:28:40,440
Speaker 1: I mean I like you, I want to jinx every

616
00:28:40,440 --> 00:28:43,160
Speaker 1: time I say things are great, I'm tempting fate And it

617
00:28:43,120 --> 00:28:47,520
Speaker 1: feels like but just unreal. That's just world's apart, and

618
00:28:47,560 --> 00:28:50,600
Speaker 1: I think it's kind of nicer. Marley was easy. So

619
00:28:50,600 --> 00:28:52,200
Speaker 1: we were like, oh, why the fuck do parents can

620
00:28:52,200 --> 00:28:54,240
Speaker 1: plain so much? Yeah, lolla, just the other end of

621
00:28:54,280 --> 00:28:55,880
Speaker 1: the spectrum that we were like, oh my god, what

622
00:28:55,920 --> 00:28:59,000
Speaker 1: have we done? And so we're just firmly fixed embrace

623
00:28:59,040 --> 00:29:02,360
Speaker 1: position for Poppy to arrive. And then so it's just

624
00:29:02,440 --> 00:29:05,920
Speaker 1: been our expectations were so low for what life was

625
00:29:05,960 --> 00:29:08,320
Speaker 1: going to be like that it's it's been a lot.

626
00:29:08,360 --> 00:29:10,880
Speaker 4: Yeah, we recorded with the baby, like right there, and

627
00:29:11,120 --> 00:29:12,040
Speaker 4: like a whole.

628
00:29:11,800 --> 00:29:12,560
Speaker 2: Episode with Laura.

629
00:29:12,920 --> 00:29:15,080
Speaker 1: The baby made a couple of coups.

630
00:29:14,760 --> 00:29:18,120
Speaker 2: And like and then that was it. It set. Isn't

631
00:29:18,120 --> 00:29:20,320
Speaker 2: it funny though, when you're a bit smug as a parent,

632
00:29:20,800 --> 00:29:24,360
Speaker 2: how that just like rains down all fury on you.

633
00:29:24,520 --> 00:29:27,520
Speaker 1: Like I remember vividly speaking to Laura and being like,

634
00:29:27,560 --> 00:29:28,960
Speaker 1: why do parents complain?

635
00:29:30,280 --> 00:29:33,800
Speaker 2: You're going to get us canceled mat which I now regret.

636
00:29:33,960 --> 00:29:35,920
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I know, yeah.

637
00:29:35,720 --> 00:29:39,960
Speaker 2: We would do that. My sister in law has four kids,

638
00:29:40,160 --> 00:29:42,880
Speaker 2: and she, you know, like at that point when i'd

639
00:29:42,880 --> 00:29:45,520
Speaker 2: met esther, idn' been through the baby thing, right, because

640
00:29:45,760 --> 00:29:48,200
Speaker 2: Ethan was three, you know, have these toddler things you

641
00:29:48,240 --> 00:29:51,239
Speaker 2: were killing. It was easy, as I used to think

642
00:29:51,240 --> 00:29:53,600
Speaker 2: all the time, she'd be real stressed about sleep times

643
00:29:53,640 --> 00:29:55,840
Speaker 2: and eat times and naptimes. I'd be to and be like,

644
00:29:55,840 --> 00:30:01,000
Speaker 2: oh my god, your sister's so crazy. And then you

645
00:30:01,080 --> 00:30:02,520
Speaker 2: get a newborn baby and you're like.

646
00:30:02,960 --> 00:30:10,840
Speaker 1: Why why we always talk about ash and I there's

647
00:30:10,920 --> 00:30:13,880
Speaker 1: like a parenting hierarchy when you meet a new parent

648
00:30:14,360 --> 00:30:17,240
Speaker 1: and you compare ages of their child versus your child,

649
00:30:17,520 --> 00:30:19,560
Speaker 1: and whoever has the older child is obviously the more

650
00:30:19,600 --> 00:30:20,400
Speaker 1: dominant parent.

651
00:30:20,480 --> 00:30:22,600
Speaker 4: Of course, all the more kids, Like I haven't convinced

652
00:30:22,680 --> 00:30:24,080
Speaker 4: that had a third so he could be the more

653
00:30:24,080 --> 00:30:26,600
Speaker 4: dominant out of the child's.

654
00:30:25,800 --> 00:30:29,640
Speaker 1: Work, more masculinity than me. So I was just like, Laura,

655
00:30:29,680 --> 00:30:36,120
Speaker 1: come here, so far it's working. It is working, but

656
00:30:36,240 --> 00:30:41,640
Speaker 1: you are you are the alpha in this environ. You

657
00:30:41,680 --> 00:30:45,880
Speaker 1: are as granddad, granddaddy. When did you become a grandad?

658
00:30:45,960 --> 00:30:48,160
Speaker 2: Let's start with that. Just over a year ago and

659
00:30:48,200 --> 00:30:52,160
Speaker 2: you were the age of thirty seven. Got to be

660
00:30:52,200 --> 00:30:52,760
Speaker 2: a record.

661
00:30:53,160 --> 00:30:57,560
Speaker 4: Do you know what the youngest grand grandchild, youngest grandparent is?

662
00:30:57,800 --> 00:31:01,120
Speaker 1: What's I think it's like horrific, like twenty Yeah, I

663
00:31:01,440 --> 00:31:03,760
Speaker 1: could doone that it would be some legalities, I think

664
00:31:03,760 --> 00:31:04,440
Speaker 1: in the youngest.

665
00:31:04,480 --> 00:31:06,520
Speaker 2: But it was funny because it got picked The story

666
00:31:06,560 --> 00:31:09,400
Speaker 2: got picked up by a couple of you know, news outlets,

667
00:31:09,520 --> 00:31:11,480
Speaker 2: and there was some over in the UK, and you know,

668
00:31:11,520 --> 00:31:14,120
Speaker 2: the comments are always like, how is this possible with

669
00:31:14,160 --> 00:31:16,000
Speaker 2: the maths and blah blah blah blah blah. She looks

670
00:31:16,000 --> 00:31:17,800
Speaker 2: so young, I know, right, because.

671
00:31:17,640 --> 00:31:19,400
Speaker 1: People use a photo of you with no facial hair.

672
00:31:20,040 --> 00:31:22,160
Speaker 1: You were just talking about this. I was like, who's that?

673
00:31:22,800 --> 00:31:24,640
Speaker 2: I'm sure we're all the same. We grow facial hair

674
00:31:24,680 --> 00:31:26,160
Speaker 2: to get some sort of respect, right.

675
00:31:27,960 --> 00:31:31,160
Speaker 1: Talking to you guys with mustache, that's all great.

676
00:31:32,000 --> 00:31:33,800
Speaker 2: And so it was funny because in the comments you'd

677
00:31:33,800 --> 00:31:35,920
Speaker 2: see the people who are like, his wife's four years

678
00:31:35,920 --> 00:31:37,920
Speaker 2: older than him, if she was eighteen, he must have

679
00:31:37,960 --> 00:31:41,080
Speaker 2: been fourteen. That's illegal. And then you know, then you

680
00:31:41,160 --> 00:31:44,240
Speaker 2: get people who go coughing. She's just like, I know right,

681
00:31:44,320 --> 00:31:45,880
Speaker 2: she was saying to me, can you get in there

682
00:31:45,920 --> 00:31:50,440
Speaker 2: and say something. I'm like, no, popcorn, let the speak.

683
00:31:51,360 --> 00:31:54,000
Speaker 2: And then you get people from the UK who be like, oh,

684
00:31:54,000 --> 00:31:58,560
Speaker 2: that's completely normal my Auntie Bethel and like you.

685
00:31:58,560 --> 00:32:01,120
Speaker 1: Know, so yeah, Anil, Yeah.

686
00:32:00,960 --> 00:32:03,120
Speaker 2: Auntie Bethel. She was always up to no good Auntie

687
00:32:03,120 --> 00:32:05,320
Speaker 2: Bethel behavior. But yeah, so I was. I would was

688
00:32:05,360 --> 00:32:08,800
Speaker 2: thirty seven and yeah, it was a It was pretty

689
00:32:08,800 --> 00:32:11,920
Speaker 2: crazy like it even when Ethan so Ethan called me

690
00:32:12,120 --> 00:32:15,600
Speaker 2: to say he was proposing to his girlfriend and they'd

691
00:32:15,640 --> 00:32:18,320
Speaker 2: only been dating a very short time. They weren't pregnant

692
00:32:18,320 --> 00:32:21,280
Speaker 2: at the time, but my first thing was is she pregnant?

693
00:32:21,320 --> 00:32:24,479
Speaker 2: You've knocked her? And he's like, why would you ask that.

694
00:32:26,000 --> 00:32:27,400
Speaker 2: We've got a couple of things on the go here.

695
00:32:27,520 --> 00:32:29,520
Speaker 2: I'm at a food and wine festival and I've had

696
00:32:29,560 --> 00:32:32,200
Speaker 2: two bottles of Chirats, So that's the first thing.

697
00:32:32,280 --> 00:32:37,320
Speaker 5: Let me second question is you've just started dating mate,

698
00:32:37,520 --> 00:32:40,800
Speaker 5: Like that's but no, he was, Yeah, he'd fallen in

699
00:32:40,800 --> 00:32:43,440
Speaker 5: love and they wanted to get married, so wow, Yeah,

700
00:32:43,480 --> 00:32:46,080
Speaker 5: and then I knew after that, I knew if they

701
00:32:46,120 --> 00:32:47,280
Speaker 5: moved that quick to get married.

702
00:32:47,280 --> 00:32:49,960
Speaker 2: I was like, they're definitely you want to have kids quickly.

703
00:32:50,000 --> 00:32:52,640
Speaker 2: Because he was twenty three when he had his he

704
00:32:52,640 --> 00:32:54,400
Speaker 2: would have been twenty year two.

705
00:32:54,440 --> 00:32:54,920
Speaker 1: Two.

706
00:32:55,320 --> 00:32:58,080
Speaker 2: Oh, I can't think of the man, No, twenty three.

707
00:32:58,120 --> 00:33:02,560
Speaker 2: You're right, you know him better than I do think.

708
00:33:02,920 --> 00:33:03,920
Speaker 1: I think I came.

709
00:33:04,080 --> 00:33:06,880
Speaker 4: I became a dad of what twenty nine, and I

710
00:33:06,920 --> 00:33:09,800
Speaker 4: was like, oh, that feels young, like he must have

711
00:33:10,040 --> 00:33:10,760
Speaker 4: I mean, he mustn't.

712
00:33:10,760 --> 00:33:12,280
Speaker 2: You must know what he wants, which is a good

713
00:33:12,360 --> 00:33:12,960
Speaker 2: quality to have.

714
00:33:13,040 --> 00:33:16,040
Speaker 1: Actually that I became another as you're becoming a granddad.

715
00:33:16,040 --> 00:33:17,000
Speaker 1: I had a third child.

716
00:33:17,320 --> 00:33:20,240
Speaker 2: Yeow, well, I said to esther, how crazy if we

717
00:33:20,280 --> 00:33:22,240
Speaker 2: went back for a third and you and our daughter

718
00:33:22,320 --> 00:33:23,960
Speaker 2: in law were in the hospital at the same time,

719
00:33:24,000 --> 00:33:27,720
Speaker 2: and baby, God, modern family stuff, you like, let's do it.

720
00:33:30,120 --> 00:33:31,880
Speaker 2: There's no chance of that happening.

721
00:33:32,160 --> 00:33:32,840
Speaker 3: Yes, me too.

722
00:33:33,360 --> 00:33:36,080
Speaker 1: So what's it like being a granddad at thirty seven?

723
00:33:36,320 --> 00:33:41,160
Speaker 2: It's actually really cool, right, Like it's funny because it's different,

724
00:33:41,200 --> 00:33:44,239
Speaker 2: I guess because you know, like your grandparents they've got

725
00:33:44,240 --> 00:33:46,040
Speaker 2: a little bit more or your parents they've got a

726
00:33:46,040 --> 00:33:48,800
Speaker 2: bit more time because the kids at home, right, So

727
00:33:49,120 --> 00:33:52,680
Speaker 2: the difficulties are if Maddie and Ethan want us to babysit,

728
00:33:53,200 --> 00:33:54,640
Speaker 2: like we're still in the middle of.

729
00:33:55,400 --> 00:33:56,600
Speaker 1: Throw me in with the rest of them as well.

730
00:33:56,680 --> 00:33:59,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, kids who do dance and go to

731
00:33:59,280 --> 00:34:03,040
Speaker 2: school and football and parties and all the stuff, you know,

732
00:34:03,280 --> 00:34:09,239
Speaker 2: and then we take along our grandchild, you know, so

733
00:34:09,880 --> 00:34:11,520
Speaker 2: and then I think, like, what's it going to be

734
00:34:11,600 --> 00:34:15,040
Speaker 2: like when she goes to school and they have grandparents Day.

735
00:34:15,200 --> 00:34:17,520
Speaker 2: You're getting roped into the double and.

736
00:34:17,440 --> 00:34:18,399
Speaker 1: You're skipping in.

737
00:34:18,840 --> 00:34:21,520
Speaker 2: So I'm going to be forty two.

738
00:34:22,000 --> 00:34:23,200
Speaker 1: You can be helping them down the stairs.

739
00:34:23,200 --> 00:34:25,440
Speaker 2: It's grandparents Day when I go along.

740
00:34:25,800 --> 00:34:29,200
Speaker 1: So what a flex you know, right, the only one

741
00:34:29,239 --> 00:34:36,040
Speaker 1: there with all your hips and knees and.

742
00:34:33,320 --> 00:34:36,920
Speaker 4: There's so there's so much material in this it's amazing.

743
00:34:36,960 --> 00:34:38,640
Speaker 1: We were talking. I'm like, what's the end goal?

744
00:34:38,680 --> 00:34:40,719
Speaker 4: How many greats do you want in front of grandfather

745
00:34:40,800 --> 00:34:41,719
Speaker 4: before you You're like.

746
00:34:42,600 --> 00:34:45,319
Speaker 2: Man, I could go if they keep it, If all

747
00:34:45,360 --> 00:34:48,120
Speaker 2: of my grandchildren they keep having them younger and younger,

748
00:34:48,600 --> 00:34:52,200
Speaker 2: like you could be great great great great grandfather. Yeah,

749
00:34:52,360 --> 00:34:54,080
Speaker 2: that might be some sort of record that I could

750
00:34:54,120 --> 00:34:57,560
Speaker 2: crack out. Surely, surely very expensive Christmas.

751
00:34:59,640 --> 00:35:00,640
Speaker 1: Please let me die.

752
00:35:00,680 --> 00:35:05,000
Speaker 2: I kind of all this, but yeah, it's it's yeah,

753
00:35:05,000 --> 00:35:08,319
Speaker 2: it's crazy. And obviously if I'm pushing the pram with

754
00:35:08,360 --> 00:35:11,080
Speaker 2: her in there, people would assume she's my daughter.

755
00:35:11,200 --> 00:35:13,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, totally, have you corrected?

756
00:35:13,719 --> 00:35:17,960
Speaker 2: Just oh, I love it. Oh it's if someone says, oh,

757
00:35:18,000 --> 00:35:20,640
Speaker 2: your daughter's so cute. Okay, this is my granddaughter, and

758
00:35:20,640 --> 00:35:23,319
Speaker 2: then they go ha ha, No, she's my granddaughter, and

759
00:35:23,360 --> 00:35:25,840
Speaker 2: then you see their mind ticking and then they're like,

760
00:35:26,360 --> 00:35:28,839
Speaker 2: am I lad to ask? Should I ask? Yeah? How

761
00:35:28,840 --> 00:35:31,160
Speaker 2: did that happen? Like? Yeah, I'm very young. I'm only

762
00:35:31,200 --> 00:35:32,920
Speaker 2: thirty eight. Anyway, have a great day, and I just

763
00:35:32,960 --> 00:35:33,399
Speaker 2: walk off.

764
00:35:34,360 --> 00:35:35,360
Speaker 1: I did the opposite.

765
00:35:35,400 --> 00:35:39,680
Speaker 4: Remember I missed grandparents and someone else I was like, oh,

766
00:35:39,760 --> 00:35:44,080
Speaker 4: so this is your granddaughters? Like oh yeah, I felt horrible.

767
00:35:44,800 --> 00:35:46,439
Speaker 4: I just moved on with my day real quick.

768
00:35:46,680 --> 00:35:50,640
Speaker 2: That's that's like a woman could be nine months pregnant,

769
00:35:50,960 --> 00:35:53,239
Speaker 2: the baby could be halfway out, and I would still

770
00:35:53,280 --> 00:35:54,520
Speaker 2: be like, oh are you pregnant?

771
00:35:57,400 --> 00:35:58,040
Speaker 1: I did that too.

772
00:35:59,280 --> 00:36:01,920
Speaker 2: That is two godlets, I will did.

773
00:36:01,800 --> 00:36:02,680
Speaker 1: That part of you?

774
00:36:03,719 --> 00:36:03,919
Speaker 2: Yeah?

775
00:36:03,960 --> 00:36:07,280
Speaker 1: She was like huge, I'm so sorry.

776
00:36:07,719 --> 00:36:09,399
Speaker 2: Yeah, no you don't. You don't run there.

777
00:36:09,520 --> 00:36:12,360
Speaker 1: No, Yeah, at the moment, the things that we have

778
00:36:12,400 --> 00:36:15,239
Speaker 1: to worry about his parents, Like my eldest Maley is

779
00:36:15,320 --> 00:36:18,640
Speaker 1: six and Oscar's six six at the same time a.

780
00:36:18,640 --> 00:36:23,799
Speaker 2: Week apart, man, you know where just to remind you me,

781
00:36:24,080 --> 00:36:26,279
Speaker 2: all right, So it's on you to remind him, don't

782
00:36:26,320 --> 00:36:26,720
Speaker 2: you worry?

783
00:36:26,800 --> 00:36:29,960
Speaker 1: I remind you. I know, his whole family's birthdays.

784
00:36:30,160 --> 00:36:31,160
Speaker 2: He doesn't even know mine.

785
00:36:31,360 --> 00:36:37,680
Speaker 1: That's August twenty six, wrong, It's part of the stick.

786
00:36:38,880 --> 00:36:40,719
Speaker 1: But the things that we have to worry about at

787
00:36:40,760 --> 00:36:43,040
Speaker 1: the moment are like, you know, teaching the kids how

788
00:36:43,080 --> 00:36:47,080
Speaker 1: to read, you know, having like little play dates. And

789
00:36:47,120 --> 00:36:49,200
Speaker 1: I often try and imagine what it's going to be

790
00:36:49,360 --> 00:36:51,759
Speaker 1: like when my kids are in high school, in that

791
00:36:52,040 --> 00:36:53,520
Speaker 1: next stage of their lives.

792
00:36:54,160 --> 00:36:58,120
Speaker 2: What is that like, It's a whole different ballgame.

793
00:36:58,400 --> 00:36:59,480
Speaker 1: What do we have to watch out for.

794
00:37:00,160 --> 00:37:04,000
Speaker 2: It's probably even changed a little bit more since like

795
00:37:04,080 --> 00:37:06,480
Speaker 2: Ethan was in high school. But I mean, the social

796
00:37:06,520 --> 00:37:08,799
Speaker 2: media thing is a huge thing, right, Like that was

797
00:37:08,840 --> 00:37:11,920
Speaker 2: only just kicking off when he was in high school,

798
00:37:12,360 --> 00:37:16,120
Speaker 2: like with Facebook and Instagram was a new thing, you know,

799
00:37:16,239 --> 00:37:20,080
Speaker 2: like and we were like, we I know what I

800
00:37:20,239 --> 00:37:23,839
Speaker 2: was like as a teenager. So I would we'd check

801
00:37:23,880 --> 00:37:28,000
Speaker 2: his phone a lot. You know, he got catfished on

802
00:37:28,040 --> 00:37:32,200
Speaker 2: Facebook by someone. Yeah, this very attractive girl was sending

803
00:37:32,280 --> 00:37:34,600
Speaker 2: him messages. And this is before AI too, so there's

804
00:37:34,600 --> 00:37:37,319
Speaker 2: a lot of effort that goes into this one. And

805
00:37:37,400 --> 00:37:39,880
Speaker 2: I was like, oh, yeah, classic, you know, chatting da

806
00:37:39,960 --> 00:37:41,960
Speaker 2: da da. But then as I went through the messages

807
00:37:42,000 --> 00:37:45,800
Speaker 2: more and more they were asking him to send explicit

808
00:37:46,000 --> 00:37:49,800
Speaker 2: picks to her. Wow, And I was like, this is full.

809
00:37:49,640 --> 00:37:52,840
Speaker 1: On, and can I just ask would you check his

810
00:37:52,960 --> 00:37:54,760
Speaker 1: phone regularly or correct?

811
00:37:54,880 --> 00:37:57,200
Speaker 2: Yeah? And we were open with him about that because

812
00:37:57,200 --> 00:37:59,839
Speaker 2: he had an iPhone and we're like, you know, we're

813
00:38:00,120 --> 00:38:03,399
Speaker 2: to give you this to have, but we will check

814
00:38:03,440 --> 00:38:08,080
Speaker 2: it like and frequently. So the scariest flag in the

815
00:38:08,120 --> 00:38:11,479
Speaker 2: whole thing was they were asking for the photos of him,

816
00:38:12,040 --> 00:38:14,719
Speaker 2: but they were wanted his face in them. They were

817
00:38:15,080 --> 00:38:17,719
Speaker 2: very like, make sure your faces in them. We want

818
00:38:17,760 --> 00:38:19,319
Speaker 2: your face. Your face has got to be in it.

819
00:38:19,640 --> 00:38:22,719
Speaker 2: And luckily we caught it in time because then when

820
00:38:22,719 --> 00:38:25,120
Speaker 2: I sort of looked into it, they use it to

821
00:38:25,200 --> 00:38:28,880
Speaker 2: blackmail the kid, to go like, hey, we have this

822
00:38:28,920 --> 00:38:31,480
Speaker 2: photo of you. We're not this chick, you know, We're

823
00:38:31,480 --> 00:38:33,839
Speaker 2: going to send it to all your contacts on Facebook

824
00:38:34,120 --> 00:38:36,560
Speaker 2: unless you do. Yeah, you know, and you've heard stories

825
00:38:36,560 --> 00:38:39,160
Speaker 2: about it before. It didn't get that farther, Like we

826
00:38:39,239 --> 00:38:40,560
Speaker 2: knew that's where it was going to go.

827
00:38:40,880 --> 00:38:43,560
Speaker 1: But and had he mentioned to you those messages were

828
00:38:43,560 --> 00:38:44,240
Speaker 1: there or did.

829
00:38:44,120 --> 00:38:45,799
Speaker 2: You we found them? I found them?

830
00:38:46,520 --> 00:38:51,520
Speaker 4: Fuck imagine if yeah, later, you're making parenting right now

831
00:38:51,520 --> 00:38:52,760
Speaker 4: for me seem really easy.

832
00:38:53,000 --> 00:38:57,560
Speaker 2: So yeah, that seems like really like oh man, yeah,

833
00:38:57,640 --> 00:39:01,800
Speaker 2: totally right. And so we caught that. Luckily iPhone straight

834
00:39:01,840 --> 00:39:04,520
Speaker 2: off him went to Big w and bought the shittiest

835
00:39:04,640 --> 00:39:07,880
Speaker 2: Nokia phone you could possibly get. That was just texting

836
00:39:07,920 --> 00:39:11,560
Speaker 2: and calling, and he had to earn back the phone.

837
00:39:12,040 --> 00:39:14,400
Speaker 2: But it's a hard one to manage because when we

838
00:39:14,440 --> 00:39:17,680
Speaker 2: took that away from him, all of his basketball team

839
00:39:17,719 --> 00:39:20,320
Speaker 2: and stuff they were all on Messenger, So he missed

840
00:39:20,320 --> 00:39:23,360
Speaker 2: out on a whole heap of things to do with

841
00:39:23,480 --> 00:39:28,080
Speaker 2: his friends and stuff because they don't really text, so

842
00:39:28,640 --> 00:39:30,400
Speaker 2: it's hard to go.

843
00:39:31,120 --> 00:39:32,480
Speaker 1: We don't want to isolate.

844
00:39:32,080 --> 00:39:34,480
Speaker 2: Them, correct, So we had to manage that. That was

845
00:39:34,480 --> 00:39:36,480
Speaker 2: probably one of the scariest moments.

846
00:39:36,640 --> 00:39:39,480
Speaker 4: It's also hard too, because it's like he's a teenage

847
00:39:39,560 --> 00:39:43,360
Speaker 4: boy thinking he's talking to a girl, which is completely

848
00:39:43,400 --> 00:39:47,400
Speaker 4: normal and it's exciting, and then all of a sudden

849
00:39:47,440 --> 00:39:49,719
Speaker 4: you're being punished for it, and it's like because you

850
00:39:49,760 --> 00:39:52,360
Speaker 4: don't understand what you were actually the rabbit hole you

851
00:39:52,400 --> 00:39:55,400
Speaker 4: were going down because you are still a teenager.

852
00:39:55,440 --> 00:39:58,160
Speaker 1: And then you've got to navigate that as a parent.

853
00:39:58,239 --> 00:40:00,600
Speaker 4: Oh man, I'm freaking out already in my kids. He's

854
00:40:00,640 --> 00:40:01,239
Speaker 4: away from that.

855
00:40:01,640 --> 00:40:05,000
Speaker 2: So that stuff, that stuff is scary to navigate. But

856
00:40:05,400 --> 00:40:07,520
Speaker 2: you know, I think my only advice to people, and

857
00:40:07,640 --> 00:40:09,600
Speaker 2: you know, whether it's try to wrong, is just be

858
00:40:09,840 --> 00:40:15,200
Speaker 2: like so grossly open and honest about things that you

859
00:40:15,239 --> 00:40:17,120
Speaker 2: can catch it if it makes sense.

860
00:40:17,520 --> 00:40:19,680
Speaker 4: Yeah, And I look back now when I was a

861
00:40:19,719 --> 00:40:22,719
Speaker 4: teenager and how gross and honest my mum was with

862
00:40:22,840 --> 00:40:25,600
Speaker 4: me all the time. Now that I think it's, you know,

863
00:40:25,680 --> 00:40:27,200
Speaker 4: like what she spent half an hour telling me what

864
00:40:27,239 --> 00:40:30,120
Speaker 4: an orgasm was, and I'm like, Jesus Christ, Mum, I'm.

865
00:40:30,000 --> 00:40:33,760
Speaker 1: Fourteen, probably a little too open. Let me show you

866
00:40:34,840 --> 00:40:39,120
Speaker 1: whoa whoa whoa Wow. We'll take it out. That's right,

867
00:40:39,160 --> 00:40:39,840
Speaker 1: that's good, get.

868
00:40:40,880 --> 00:40:42,880
Speaker 2: Just out of curiosity. What is an orgasm?

869
00:40:43,080 --> 00:40:47,040
Speaker 1: I don't know, but they feel good.

870
00:40:48,360 --> 00:40:51,120
Speaker 2: I'll say. This is another one, which was another wild

871
00:40:51,200 --> 00:40:54,640
Speaker 2: story was as Ethan got older, he had a girl

872
00:40:54,640 --> 00:40:58,240
Speaker 2: who was his girlfriend. Was real, this one was real nice,

873
00:40:58,320 --> 00:41:01,040
Speaker 2: But that was obviously also starting to take like some

874
00:41:01,080 --> 00:41:02,880
Speaker 2: of the messages were starting to take a bit of

875
00:41:02,880 --> 00:41:05,160
Speaker 2: a sexual turn, as they do when they're chatting or whatever.

876
00:41:05,600 --> 00:41:08,839
Speaker 2: And I said to Estogo, you know, he's fifteen. We're

877
00:41:08,880 --> 00:41:11,680
Speaker 2: going to have to have the talk. We obviously talked

878
00:41:11,680 --> 00:41:14,000
Speaker 2: about how it all works before she goes in what way?

879
00:41:14,040 --> 00:41:15,600
Speaker 2: I said, he needs to know how to put on

880
00:41:15,640 --> 00:41:18,640
Speaker 2: a condom? Yeah, she goes, how are you going to

881
00:41:18,880 --> 00:41:19,480
Speaker 2: teach him that?

882
00:41:19,680 --> 00:41:24,640
Speaker 6: Yeah, I'm glad you asked. It's like, hold my bee,

883
00:41:28,600 --> 00:41:31,080
Speaker 6: grab one out, one of.

884
00:41:31,040 --> 00:41:31,839
Speaker 1: The extra large ones.

885
00:41:31,840 --> 00:41:35,920
Speaker 2: Of course, of course, grab it out. Come storm to

886
00:41:36,080 --> 00:41:39,520
Speaker 2: go down the down the hallway. Kick probably wasn't this dramatic,

887
00:41:39,560 --> 00:41:42,040
Speaker 2: but I feel like, kick the door open. It's like

888
00:41:42,280 --> 00:41:45,280
Speaker 2: we need a chat. He's on like chatting playing games online.

889
00:41:45,280 --> 00:41:47,080
Speaker 2: Of his mates say, oh, my dad's here. Boys, I'll

890
00:41:47,120 --> 00:41:50,840
Speaker 2: be a second. Anyway, say, when we've seen the messages,

891
00:41:51,200 --> 00:41:53,800
Speaker 2: we don't think you should obviously you know, be going

892
00:41:54,040 --> 00:41:56,960
Speaker 2: you know, doing that still too young or uh, anyway,

893
00:41:57,000 --> 00:41:58,799
Speaker 2: let's learn how to put a condom on? Grab his

894
00:41:58,840 --> 00:42:04,520
Speaker 2: PlayStation remote, tear it open.

895
00:42:05,320 --> 00:42:06,359
Speaker 1: I was like, what are you doing.

896
00:42:06,440 --> 00:42:08,040
Speaker 2: I'm like, you need to know.

897
00:42:08,360 --> 00:42:09,880
Speaker 1: You need to.

898
00:42:11,120 --> 00:42:12,080
Speaker 2: And you rolled it over it.

899
00:42:14,440 --> 00:42:18,520
Speaker 1: Did you get it back to him?

900
00:42:21,080 --> 00:42:26,800
Speaker 2: Yeah? So he was like half traumatized, half educated, perfect

901
00:42:27,000 --> 00:42:28,600
Speaker 2: all perfect parenting.

902
00:42:28,920 --> 00:42:30,880
Speaker 1: All the boys in the game are like what the

903
00:42:31,280 --> 00:42:34,040
Speaker 1: is going on while they're on Xbox playing Papal Mansion.

904
00:42:35,920 --> 00:42:37,880
Speaker 2: So I probably could have done that in a in

905
00:42:37,880 --> 00:42:41,040
Speaker 2: a better way, but I was only in my twenties. Yeah,

906
00:42:41,080 --> 00:42:44,040
Speaker 2: you just learned how to put it, You're right, you know,

907
00:42:44,200 --> 00:42:47,160
Speaker 2: so you you never really know how to do something.

908
00:42:47,160 --> 00:42:49,400
Speaker 2: You just I think it just it's like a band,

909
00:42:49,719 --> 00:42:50,400
Speaker 2: you do your best.

910
00:42:50,719 --> 00:42:54,319
Speaker 4: I think, oh man, I'm I'm petrified now thinking about it.

911
00:42:54,360 --> 00:42:56,760
Speaker 4: But then at the same time, I like the idea

912
00:42:57,040 --> 00:42:58,720
Speaker 4: of approaching.

913
00:42:58,280 --> 00:42:59,160
Speaker 1: It with a bit of humor.

914
00:42:59,640 --> 00:43:00,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, get help.

915
00:43:00,600 --> 00:43:01,319
Speaker 1: I think it helped.

916
00:43:01,360 --> 00:43:03,239
Speaker 2: And I know I remember me as a teenage boy,

917
00:43:03,239 --> 00:43:05,760
Speaker 2: and you would have been the same. The same. Embarrassment

918
00:43:06,040 --> 00:43:07,520
Speaker 2: is the worst punishment.

919
00:43:07,640 --> 00:43:09,240
Speaker 1: So I think I've been able to have it.

920
00:43:09,280 --> 00:43:11,360
Speaker 4: And that's that's my Mum was trying to tell me

921
00:43:11,400 --> 00:43:14,440
Speaker 4: what an orgasm was, and I'm like.

922
00:43:14,239 --> 00:43:15,120
Speaker 1: I just don't.

923
00:43:15,200 --> 00:43:17,239
Speaker 4: But I think if it was made to be about

924
00:43:17,280 --> 00:43:19,400
Speaker 4: to be a bit more fun and funny.

925
00:43:19,719 --> 00:43:21,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, it would have sunk in a lot more. I

926
00:43:21,440 --> 00:43:23,839
Speaker 1: would know what it is, you know what I mean?

927
00:43:24,080 --> 00:43:25,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, I definitely, I definitely know. I mean it kind

928
00:43:25,920 --> 00:43:27,239
Speaker 2: of breaks the ice a little bit.

929
00:43:27,320 --> 00:43:29,319
Speaker 4: Yeah, and you know what, he'll tell that story down

930
00:43:29,360 --> 00:43:31,760
Speaker 4: the line too, and it's like, that's an amazing story

931
00:43:31,800 --> 00:43:32,120
Speaker 4: to have.

932
00:43:32,560 --> 00:43:36,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's quite girthy though, those controllers. Well he's used

933
00:43:36,120 --> 00:43:38,799
Speaker 1: to it.

934
00:43:37,440 --> 00:43:37,719
Speaker 2: I'm not.

935
00:43:40,560 --> 00:43:44,440
Speaker 1: Anyway, moving on, my god, we love kids books.

936
00:43:44,480 --> 00:43:48,759
Speaker 2: What a segue? Hey, well, you know what, you've got

937
00:43:48,800 --> 00:43:50,400
Speaker 2: to take the condumn off to make the kids, to

938
00:43:50,440 --> 00:43:58,040
Speaker 2: sell them the books. You have a kids Yes, I

939
00:43:58,040 --> 00:44:00,560
Speaker 2: believe we're a table of authors, right, that would be

940
00:44:00,920 --> 00:44:01,640
Speaker 2: we're all.

941
00:44:02,400 --> 00:44:05,480
Speaker 1: Didn't do that all. It doesn't matter. We still write it.

942
00:44:05,600 --> 00:44:07,560
Speaker 1: We were published.

943
00:44:08,080 --> 00:44:08,319
Speaker 2: Yeah.

944
00:44:08,640 --> 00:44:09,120
Speaker 1: Do you know what?

945
00:44:09,160 --> 00:44:11,600
Speaker 4: The library down at my place has heaps of copies

946
00:44:11,600 --> 00:44:12,960
Speaker 4: of it and they're all out all the time.

947
00:44:13,000 --> 00:44:15,960
Speaker 2: So that's a good sign. Excellent something too.

948
00:44:16,640 --> 00:44:21,879
Speaker 4: Hey, that's every time I tell that story is yours out?

949
00:44:22,160 --> 00:44:25,920
Speaker 2: Yes? Yeah, it's called Bumble, the bum Stinger and ours

950
00:44:25,960 --> 00:44:28,759
Speaker 2: we kind of did it. The proceeds all going to

951
00:44:28,800 --> 00:44:31,600
Speaker 2: the Make a Wish Foundation, so people will buy a

952
00:44:31,640 --> 00:44:34,720
Speaker 2: book if you guilt them. We've found away.

953
00:44:34,920 --> 00:44:36,160
Speaker 1: So yeah, why make a wish?

954
00:44:36,200 --> 00:44:38,319
Speaker 2: We did on our radio show like it was all

955
00:44:38,440 --> 00:44:40,759
Speaker 2: part of the like all the listeners would have got

956
00:44:40,760 --> 00:44:42,960
Speaker 2: involved helping us write it. You know, the best thing

957
00:44:42,960 --> 00:44:44,920
Speaker 2: about a radio show on the podcast, you can outsource

958
00:44:44,960 --> 00:44:47,200
Speaker 2: it to the listeners, which is good and we wanted

959
00:44:47,200 --> 00:44:50,400
Speaker 2: to do. Sometimes it's really hard, you know, when you

960
00:44:50,400 --> 00:44:53,439
Speaker 2: do charity stuff. It can be for people everyone's going

961
00:44:53,480 --> 00:44:55,880
Speaker 2: through something, you know, and it can be hard to

962
00:44:55,880 --> 00:44:59,200
Speaker 2: pick one cause sometimes like that's where we put it.

963
00:44:59,520 --> 00:45:00,880
Speaker 2: You know, we've done a lot of things on our

964
00:45:00,880 --> 00:45:04,040
Speaker 2: show before where we've helped people individually and stuff. So

965
00:45:04,080 --> 00:45:07,520
Speaker 2: we wanted to just do something a bit more joyful,

966
00:45:07,880 --> 00:45:10,400
Speaker 2: if that makes sense. And I just love make a

967
00:45:10,440 --> 00:45:12,719
Speaker 2: wish like what they do, not just for the kids

968
00:45:12,760 --> 00:45:16,120
Speaker 2: who've gone through really hard time. A lot of the

969
00:45:16,160 --> 00:45:19,040
Speaker 2: wishes are for the whole family, because you know, they're

970
00:45:19,080 --> 00:45:21,840
Speaker 2: siblings of those kids who've had to deal with a

971
00:45:21,840 --> 00:45:24,759
Speaker 2: lot of trauma, who've had to give up a lot

972
00:45:24,760 --> 00:45:27,960
Speaker 2: of their stuff to help their brother or their sister

973
00:45:28,200 --> 00:45:31,160
Speaker 2: through that time. And Abby, who I'm on air with,

974
00:45:31,320 --> 00:45:33,879
Speaker 2: had a friend of hers who had had a child

975
00:45:34,239 --> 00:45:36,480
Speaker 2: get a wish granted before, and we just thought like

976
00:45:36,560 --> 00:45:39,799
Speaker 2: that was the perfect charity to support. So that's why

977
00:45:39,800 --> 00:45:40,319
Speaker 2: we picked them.

978
00:45:40,400 --> 00:45:42,400
Speaker 1: Can I ask, I don't want to give away any spoilers,

979
00:45:42,680 --> 00:45:44,319
Speaker 1: but what does the bum stinger get up to?

980
00:45:44,680 --> 00:45:47,640
Speaker 2: Stings all of his friends. He's just pretty much a pest,

981
00:45:48,080 --> 00:45:50,640
Speaker 2: can't get anyone to like them, And then the three

982
00:45:50,680 --> 00:45:55,400
Speaker 2: friends had to plan to protect themselves from the bum Stinger.

983
00:45:55,600 --> 00:45:58,480
Speaker 4: I know what we're reading at bedtime tonight. My kids

984
00:45:58,520 --> 00:46:01,200
Speaker 4: are going to love that. The word bum is well play.

985
00:46:01,360 --> 00:46:07,880
Speaker 2: Yes, that was my contribution to the book. So the

986
00:46:07,920 --> 00:46:11,239
Speaker 2: other three characters are Stave, Abby and myself, my co

987
00:46:11,320 --> 00:46:13,920
Speaker 2: hosts on the radio show It's Cool and It Rhymes,

988
00:46:13,960 --> 00:46:16,000
Speaker 2: which was the other thing, and that One of the

989
00:46:16,040 --> 00:46:18,720
Speaker 2: main things we decided on the book was we wanted

990
00:46:18,760 --> 00:46:21,400
Speaker 2: to make it long enough that you didn't have to

991
00:46:21,400 --> 00:46:24,560
Speaker 2: read two books, but short enough that you didn't have

992
00:46:24,640 --> 00:46:27,040
Speaker 2: to skip a page and accidentally skip a page that

993
00:46:27,080 --> 00:46:28,799
Speaker 2: they really love and they go, you missed a page,

994
00:46:28,880 --> 00:46:29,520
Speaker 2: go back to the start.

995
00:46:30,400 --> 00:46:31,160
Speaker 1: We went wrong there.

996
00:46:31,280 --> 00:46:33,200
Speaker 4: We didn't think about that, did we, Because now it's

997
00:46:33,239 --> 00:46:36,040
Speaker 4: like ours is like a bit too long, and people

998
00:46:36,040 --> 00:46:37,360
Speaker 4: are like dare you do this to me?

999
00:46:37,920 --> 00:46:39,440
Speaker 1: It's a marathon every book reading.

1000
00:46:39,520 --> 00:46:42,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, but this is cool, really colorful.

1001
00:46:41,719 --> 00:46:43,000
Speaker 1: I like, and where is it available?

1002
00:46:43,080 --> 00:46:45,480
Speaker 2: So book typia dot com dot au is we can

1003
00:46:45,480 --> 00:46:47,399
Speaker 2: get that. But it's a different world making a book

1004
00:46:47,400 --> 00:46:50,680
Speaker 2: be as you guys know. They need time to do stuff,

1005
00:46:51,360 --> 00:46:51,600
Speaker 2: you know.

1006
00:46:52,040 --> 00:46:55,040
Speaker 1: But it's also it's like, here's my analogy. If you're

1007
00:46:55,080 --> 00:46:56,800
Speaker 1: going to be in a play where you've got heaps

1008
00:46:56,840 --> 00:46:59,719
Speaker 1: to say, you don't stress so much of each word

1009
00:46:59,719 --> 00:47:02,000
Speaker 1: because you've got so much of them. But when you're

1010
00:47:02,000 --> 00:47:03,879
Speaker 1: writing a kid's book and you've only got a really

1011
00:47:03,920 --> 00:47:08,280
Speaker 1: finite number of words, agonize over every single one. It's harder.

1012
00:47:08,320 --> 00:47:11,520
Speaker 2: I reckon, Yeah, definitely. Even when we wrote ours and

1013
00:47:11,520 --> 00:47:13,600
Speaker 2: then we sent it off to the editor to check

1014
00:47:13,760 --> 00:47:16,160
Speaker 2: and they send it back and we're obviously done because

1015
00:47:16,160 --> 00:47:17,400
Speaker 2: we changed a lot of those words.

1016
00:47:17,600 --> 00:47:21,120
Speaker 4: Matt actually rewrote most of our book off the back

1017
00:47:21,160 --> 00:47:23,560
Speaker 4: of a ghostwriter because he had a much better vision.

1018
00:47:23,600 --> 00:47:25,319
Speaker 2: I would say, and he.

1019
00:47:25,280 --> 00:47:28,239
Speaker 1: Could, and the micromanager in me was like, I need

1020
00:47:29,320 --> 00:47:30,560
Speaker 1: He was like, do you mind if I rewrite?

1021
00:47:30,560 --> 00:47:33,200
Speaker 4: It was like, I'm not much of a writer, but

1022
00:47:33,960 --> 00:47:37,040
Speaker 4: you're right, Matt, trying to get your message into only

1023
00:47:37,080 --> 00:47:39,400
Speaker 4: a finite amount of words and keep the engagement of

1024
00:47:39,440 --> 00:47:42,600
Speaker 4: a child is so much harder than trying to well

1025
00:47:42,640 --> 00:47:44,360
Speaker 4: as I would imagine. I've never written a play.

1026
00:47:45,160 --> 00:47:46,000
Speaker 1: Maybe we should do that.

1027
00:47:48,360 --> 00:47:50,640
Speaker 2: I just wish my English teacher was alive to see it,

1028
00:47:50,680 --> 00:47:53,560
Speaker 2: because I handed in no assignments in year twelve. I

1029
00:47:53,600 --> 00:47:55,799
Speaker 2: think she would be so proud that I've actually got

1030
00:47:55,840 --> 00:47:57,160
Speaker 2: something written down. Yeah.

1031
00:47:57,600 --> 00:47:59,920
Speaker 4: My English seature said I would be a used car salesman,

1032
00:48:00,040 --> 00:48:01,880
Speaker 4: and I was, and then I wrote a book, so

1033
00:48:02,880 --> 00:48:03,480
Speaker 4: fuck you.

1034
00:48:04,680 --> 00:48:08,160
Speaker 1: We always end the episode on a hypothetical, but this

1035
00:48:08,280 --> 00:48:11,239
Speaker 1: is a little bit different because you've, as a granddad,

1036
00:48:11,600 --> 00:48:15,880
Speaker 1: experienced this. But now that your first son has flown

1037
00:48:15,920 --> 00:48:18,600
Speaker 1: the nest, he's no longer living at home, And tell me,

1038
00:48:18,640 --> 00:48:20,480
Speaker 1: if you've achieved this or not, what is the one

1039
00:48:20,520 --> 00:48:22,160
Speaker 1: thing you want him to remember about the house he

1040
00:48:22,200 --> 00:48:22,680
Speaker 1: grew up in.

1041
00:48:24,239 --> 00:48:28,040
Speaker 2: I think you want them to remember it as somewhere

1042
00:48:28,040 --> 00:48:30,640
Speaker 2: they could always come back to. Now. I know that

1043
00:48:30,800 --> 00:48:33,879
Speaker 2: is probably the cliche answer. Everyone gets you. Everyone probably does.

1044
00:48:34,239 --> 00:48:34,399
Speaker 4: No.

1045
00:48:34,480 --> 00:48:37,239
Speaker 1: Actually, usually like once they go they go on get out.

1046
00:48:37,120 --> 00:48:40,359
Speaker 2: Of here, right. Yeah, I thought we would think that too.

1047
00:48:40,440 --> 00:48:44,200
Speaker 2: You know, he moved out, he had the biggest bedroom downstairs,

1048
00:48:44,239 --> 00:48:46,400
Speaker 2: and I was like, sweet, I'm getting that real estate.

1049
00:48:48,520 --> 00:48:50,920
Speaker 2: But then after a couple of nights, you're kind of

1050
00:48:50,920 --> 00:48:54,040
Speaker 2: sitting around thinking where are they and what are they doing?

1051
00:48:54,320 --> 00:48:54,560
Speaker 4: You know.

1052
00:48:55,120 --> 00:48:57,399
Speaker 2: So I would always want him to remember that it's

1053
00:48:57,400 --> 00:49:00,560
Speaker 2: his house so he can come back anytime he wants.

1054
00:49:00,640 --> 00:49:02,480
Speaker 2: And he does. He walks through the door, He's like, oh, mom,

1055
00:49:02,560 --> 00:49:05,160
Speaker 2: hod it opens up the fridge, take something out. And

1056
00:49:05,719 --> 00:49:09,480
Speaker 2: I guess in my situation that he is as equal

1057
00:49:09,520 --> 00:49:12,400
Speaker 2: as all the other kids. That's always been really important

1058
00:49:12,440 --> 00:49:15,440
Speaker 2: to us that, you know, he's never felt like, you know,

1059
00:49:15,480 --> 00:49:18,120
Speaker 2: he's a step child or anything like that. And I

1060
00:49:18,160 --> 00:49:20,399
Speaker 2: would hope that he felt like that growing up, that

1061
00:49:20,400 --> 00:49:22,799
Speaker 2: that's how he was treated, and that's how I see

1062
00:49:22,840 --> 00:49:25,040
Speaker 2: him anyway. You know, like I never even say, oh,

1063
00:49:25,040 --> 00:49:27,439
Speaker 2: he's my step son. I always just call him my son.

1064
00:49:27,760 --> 00:49:30,239
Speaker 2: I love that. Yeah, that would be my main, main thing.

1065
00:49:30,280 --> 00:49:32,080
Speaker 1: It's great, man, I acted, and it's been a pleasure.

1066
00:49:32,239 --> 00:49:33,600
Speaker 2: Thank you boys. This has been a lot of fun.

1067
00:49:33,640 --> 00:49:35,600
Speaker 4: Thanks so much for spending some time with us and

1068
00:49:35,680 --> 00:49:37,600
Speaker 4: gifting us a book for us to read tonight to

1069
00:49:37,640 --> 00:49:38,240
Speaker 4: our children.

1070
00:49:38,560 --> 00:49:40,880
Speaker 2: Look, I wouldn't even hold it against you if you

1071
00:49:40,920 --> 00:49:42,960
Speaker 2: read it once and then it got regifted or throw

1072
00:49:42,960 --> 00:49:44,400
Speaker 2: it in the bin. You know. It's like I always

1073
00:49:44,440 --> 00:49:46,959
Speaker 2: say to my wife, if there's incoming into the house,

1074
00:49:47,000 --> 00:49:49,919
Speaker 2: there needs to be something outgoing. Yeah, be careful because

1075
00:49:49,920 --> 00:49:51,000
Speaker 2: it'll be you one day.

1076
00:49:53,560 --> 00:49:56,600
Speaker 1: Thanks, thanks, thank you much. Do you know what I

1077
00:49:56,640 --> 00:49:58,600
Speaker 1: kind of wish? I kind of wish I was a

1078
00:49:58,600 --> 00:50:02,879
Speaker 1: granddad really thirty seven? I want to be a young granddad. Yeah,

1079
00:50:03,160 --> 00:50:08,840
Speaker 1: like a guilf Yeah I think so, Yeah, I think so. No,

1080
00:50:08,920 --> 00:50:11,120
Speaker 1: I just want to be amongst the other granddads being like, hey,

1081
00:50:11,160 --> 00:50:16,520
Speaker 1: can you do this? It's like run, can you walk? Unassisted?

1082
00:50:17,320 --> 00:50:18,480
Speaker 1: We'll show on you guys.

1083
00:50:18,719 --> 00:50:18,919
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1084
00:50:19,080 --> 00:50:20,360
Speaker 3: The only thing you won't be able to keep up

1085
00:50:20,400 --> 00:50:22,640
Speaker 3: with them is their memory because you have a similar memory.

1086
00:50:23,200 --> 00:50:26,120
Speaker 1: Okay, Well, if you've a job this episode, leave us

1087
00:50:26,120 --> 00:50:28,400
Speaker 1: a review, because let's get out of here. I'm very offended.

1088
00:50:28,520 --> 00:50:34,080
Speaker 4: Otherwise, you can join us on socials, Instagram, Facebook, TikTok.

1089
00:50:33,760 --> 00:50:36,319
Speaker 1: Yep, and YouTube yep. And if you would like us

1090
00:50:36,360 --> 00:50:43,000
Speaker 1: to interview any mom's dad's granddad, granddad's grandmothers, give us

1091
00:50:43,000 --> 00:50:45,279
Speaker 1: some suggestions. We've got some great guests lined up for

1092
00:50:45,320 --> 00:50:47,600
Speaker 1: this year. But obviously if there's one that you're itching

1093
00:50:47,680 --> 00:50:50,440
Speaker 1: to hear from. We would love to scratch that for you.

1094
00:50:50,520 --> 00:50:52,799
Speaker 4: The good thing about the word, Gilf Matthew is it

1095
00:50:52,880 --> 00:50:56,080
Speaker 4: works both ways for grandma and granddad.

1096
00:50:56,200 --> 00:51:01,640
Speaker 1: Okay, well let's get out of here anyway. We'll see

1097
00:51:01,680 --> 00:51:17,239
Speaker 1: you later. Two Doting Dads podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians

1098
00:51:17,239 --> 00:51:20,480
Speaker 1: of country throughout Australia and the connections to land, sea

1099
00:51:20,719 --> 00:51:21,440
Speaker 1: and community.

1100
00:51:21,680 --> 00:51:24,200
Speaker 4: We pay our respects to their elders past and present

1101
00:51:24,280 --> 00:51:27,279
Speaker 4: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestraight Island

1102
00:51:27,280 --> 00:51:31,040
Speaker 4: the peoples today. This episode was recorded on Gadigal Land