1 00:00:06,080 --> 00:00:08,360 Speaker 1: At times it feels like your kids are completely out 2 00:00:08,400 --> 00:00:11,920 Speaker 1: of control today. What to do when your child is 3 00:00:11,960 --> 00:00:16,680 Speaker 1: having tantrums, being disruptive, aggressive, saying no, non cooperative, not 4 00:00:16,720 --> 00:00:21,160 Speaker 1: participating and all of those hard things. It's another tricky question. 5 00:00:21,320 --> 00:00:23,400 Speaker 1: On the Happy Families podcast, so glad to have you 6 00:00:23,400 --> 00:00:26,560 Speaker 1: along real parenting solutions every day. On Australia's most downloaded 7 00:00:26,560 --> 00:00:30,000 Speaker 1: parenting podcasts, we are Justin and Kylie Colson. Every Tuesday, 8 00:00:30,080 --> 00:00:34,720 Speaker 1: we answer your tricky questions family stuff, behavior stuff, relationships, 9 00:00:34,720 --> 00:00:37,680 Speaker 1: well being, screens, discipline. It doesn't matter what it is. 10 00:00:37,760 --> 00:00:39,599 Speaker 1: You could literally ask us anything, we'll have a chat 11 00:00:39,640 --> 00:00:41,320 Speaker 1: about it on the pod. Or you need to do is 12 00:00:41,360 --> 00:00:44,440 Speaker 1: send us a voice note to podcasts at Happy families 13 00:00:44,479 --> 00:00:46,959 Speaker 1: dot com. Do you or visit Happy Families dot com 14 00:00:46,960 --> 00:00:49,640 Speaker 1: dot you with your tricky question. There's a super simple 15 00:00:49,640 --> 00:00:53,000 Speaker 1: system there. We scroll out of the podcast part on page, 16 00:00:53,240 --> 00:00:57,800 Speaker 1: click the record button and start talking. Just like Anna 17 00:00:58,000 --> 00:00:58,920 Speaker 1: who asked us this. 18 00:01:00,120 --> 00:01:05,479 Speaker 2: I'm having trouble with my daughter. She's eleven, but she's 19 00:01:06,000 --> 00:01:14,959 Speaker 2: in full puberty and teenager here. She's constantly upset, lying, screaming, 20 00:01:16,280 --> 00:01:21,399 Speaker 2: not listening. Every morning, every day is a battle. I'm 21 00:01:21,440 --> 00:01:26,920 Speaker 2: just struggling so much to deal with everything, and I 22 00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:28,200 Speaker 2: don't know any more what to do. 23 00:01:29,319 --> 00:01:33,319 Speaker 1: Okay, Kylie, big question. You can hear the sadness in 24 00:01:33,440 --> 00:01:35,360 Speaker 1: AND's voice, you can hear the I don't know it's 25 00:01:35,360 --> 00:01:37,080 Speaker 1: desperations the right word. 26 00:01:37,160 --> 00:01:38,840 Speaker 3: I think it's just a resolve that this is what 27 00:01:38,880 --> 00:01:41,880 Speaker 3: life's become, and she doesn't see it out the exhaustion. 28 00:01:42,080 --> 00:01:45,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, it's just so hard. There could be so many 29 00:01:45,640 --> 00:01:49,800 Speaker 1: different things that are promoting and creating these challenges, and so, 30 00:01:50,280 --> 00:01:51,960 Speaker 1: in the limit of time that we've gotten, because there's 31 00:01:52,000 --> 00:01:55,480 Speaker 1: not a lot of information, let's just summarize what's going on. 32 00:01:55,680 --> 00:02:00,520 Speaker 1: Eleven year old girl, lying, screaming, not listening, creating challenges 33 00:02:00,560 --> 00:02:04,680 Speaker 1: on the daily every morning. Every day is a battle. 34 00:02:04,720 --> 00:02:06,960 Speaker 1: And we've got a mum who's really struggling. So we 35 00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:09,160 Speaker 1: don't know if there are big sisters or brothers, little 36 00:02:09,160 --> 00:02:10,960 Speaker 1: sisters or brothers. All we know is we've got this 37 00:02:11,040 --> 00:02:13,119 Speaker 1: child who's struggling. Don't know if dad's in the picture either. 38 00:02:13,919 --> 00:02:16,239 Speaker 1: So there's a handful of things that we need to 39 00:02:16,280 --> 00:02:22,000 Speaker 1: talk about. The first is just challenging behavior. Children behave 40 00:02:22,080 --> 00:02:26,240 Speaker 1: in challenging ways, usually because they have needs that aren't 41 00:02:26,240 --> 00:02:31,919 Speaker 1: being met. And sometimes it's physiological like basic safety needs 42 00:02:31,919 --> 00:02:34,760 Speaker 1: and that kind of thing. Other times it's psychological needs. 43 00:02:35,360 --> 00:02:37,720 Speaker 1: And on this podcast we talk all the time about 44 00:02:37,760 --> 00:02:41,800 Speaker 1: our children's three basic psychological needs. When I hear that 45 00:02:41,840 --> 00:02:44,320 Speaker 1: there's an eleven year old experiencing this level of distress, 46 00:02:44,800 --> 00:02:47,720 Speaker 1: this level of dysfunction, this level of deviation, those three 47 00:02:47,800 --> 00:02:51,080 Speaker 1: d's that indicate that there are definite challenges, I'm worried 48 00:02:51,120 --> 00:02:54,600 Speaker 1: here about things like depression and anxiety, although again we've 49 00:02:54,600 --> 00:02:58,399 Speaker 1: got limited information, even adhd Odd, it could be any 50 00:02:58,480 --> 00:03:01,720 Speaker 1: number of different things if we're looking for a diagnosis. 51 00:03:01,919 --> 00:03:04,239 Speaker 1: I'm not the kind of person who rushes for diagnoses, 52 00:03:04,639 --> 00:03:08,760 Speaker 1: but these things are indicative of dysfunction where somebody might 53 00:03:08,760 --> 00:03:14,359 Speaker 1: step in there. Behaviorally, I'm interested in exploring what's going on, 54 00:03:14,520 --> 00:03:16,880 Speaker 1: explaining what the rules are, and then empowering my child 55 00:03:16,880 --> 00:03:19,280 Speaker 1: to come up with some ways that we can navigate 56 00:03:19,320 --> 00:03:22,320 Speaker 1: these challenging times. So if mornings are tough, I want 57 00:03:22,320 --> 00:03:24,320 Speaker 1: to sit down with my child and say we're having 58 00:03:24,360 --> 00:03:27,120 Speaker 1: some really tough mornings. What's actually going on for you? 59 00:03:28,080 --> 00:03:31,520 Speaker 1: Is it that things are terrible at school and relationships 60 00:03:31,520 --> 00:03:34,119 Speaker 1: are horrible, or your child feels incompetent at school, maybe 61 00:03:34,120 --> 00:03:37,880 Speaker 1: they're being bullied. All of those kinds of things mean 62 00:03:37,920 --> 00:03:39,560 Speaker 1: that morning is going to be horrible, not because there's 63 00:03:39,600 --> 00:03:43,680 Speaker 1: a problem at home, but what's happening at home builds 64 00:03:43,680 --> 00:03:45,240 Speaker 1: into what the rest of the day has to be, 65 00:03:45,440 --> 00:03:46,920 Speaker 1: and they're nervous about the rest of the day. 66 00:03:47,200 --> 00:03:49,840 Speaker 3: There's so much going on for an eleven year old girl, 67 00:03:50,520 --> 00:03:54,520 Speaker 3: so much going on change almost I'm starting to just 68 00:03:54,760 --> 00:03:58,080 Speaker 3: ramp up, and she can't make sense of it, let 69 00:03:58,120 --> 00:04:01,960 Speaker 3: alone makes sense of the world outside her. So she's 70 00:04:01,960 --> 00:04:05,680 Speaker 3: got all of this internal turmoil, and clearly there is 71 00:04:05,760 --> 00:04:09,920 Speaker 3: some outside turmoil wherever that's coming from. And so our 72 00:04:10,040 --> 00:04:14,960 Speaker 3: job as parents is literally about exploring that. And sometimes 73 00:04:15,760 --> 00:04:19,960 Speaker 3: because of the lack of connection that exists because of 74 00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:23,679 Speaker 3: the challenging behavior, it's really hard to make that initial connection. 75 00:04:24,720 --> 00:04:26,840 Speaker 1: And let's just tap into that word. This is the 76 00:04:26,920 --> 00:04:28,440 Speaker 1: key thing that I wanted to get to, and that 77 00:04:28,560 --> 00:04:30,800 Speaker 1: is that when you've got a child who is not 78 00:04:30,880 --> 00:04:33,960 Speaker 1: responding to you, when you've got a child who is arguing, fighting, 79 00:04:34,320 --> 00:04:37,840 Speaker 1: blowing up, your relationship becomes correction and direction and there's 80 00:04:37,839 --> 00:04:40,680 Speaker 1: a lack of connection. Definition of connection that I emphasize 81 00:04:40,760 --> 00:04:42,800 Speaker 1: over and over and over again, is feeling seen hurd 82 00:04:42,839 --> 00:04:46,479 Speaker 1: and valued. And I would guarantee, no matter how much 83 00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:50,000 Speaker 1: Anna is trying, I guarantee that from this eleven year 84 00:04:50,000 --> 00:04:51,960 Speaker 1: old's perspective, she's just saying, I don't feel seen, hurd 85 00:04:51,960 --> 00:04:52,400 Speaker 1: and valued. 86 00:04:52,960 --> 00:04:55,719 Speaker 3: And it's a perspective thing. Mum could be doing so 87 00:04:55,880 --> 00:05:00,800 Speaker 3: many amazing things, but her daughter doesn't perceive the that's 88 00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:01,360 Speaker 3: being offered. 89 00:05:01,520 --> 00:05:03,279 Speaker 1: And that will usually be because with the very best 90 00:05:03,279 --> 00:05:05,440 Speaker 1: of intentions, where as parents are stepping in with control, 91 00:05:05,520 --> 00:05:08,560 Speaker 1: we're stepping in with correction and direction, command and control. 92 00:05:08,800 --> 00:05:11,080 Speaker 1: There are these two other basic psychological needs, right. It's 93 00:05:11,080 --> 00:05:13,840 Speaker 1: not just relatedness, it's also feeling competent. So if I'm 94 00:05:13,839 --> 00:05:16,279 Speaker 1: stepping in with command and control, correction and direction, kids 95 00:05:16,320 --> 00:05:18,280 Speaker 1: don't feel confident because I'm telling them that they're doing 96 00:05:18,320 --> 00:05:20,760 Speaker 1: it wrong, and I'm also stepping in and taking control 97 00:05:20,800 --> 00:05:22,960 Speaker 1: and taking their autonomy away, and they don't feel like 98 00:05:22,960 --> 00:05:24,240 Speaker 1: they have a voice. I don't feel like they have 99 00:05:24,240 --> 00:05:26,200 Speaker 1: any sense of being in the driver's seat of their 100 00:05:26,200 --> 00:05:26,760 Speaker 1: own lives. 101 00:05:27,200 --> 00:05:28,919 Speaker 3: But they also don't have a sense that you actually 102 00:05:28,960 --> 00:05:30,039 Speaker 3: understand what they're going through. 103 00:05:30,120 --> 00:05:31,920 Speaker 1: Yeah you don't get me, yeah, totally. 104 00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:35,200 Speaker 3: And so before we can even have these conversations. When 105 00:05:35,200 --> 00:05:38,279 Speaker 3: we've got a child that's that distressed. Sometimes it's actually 106 00:05:38,320 --> 00:05:41,839 Speaker 3: about taking away the agenda, not even having the conversation, 107 00:05:42,240 --> 00:05:45,200 Speaker 3: and going and finding some space, some time to just 108 00:05:45,360 --> 00:05:48,880 Speaker 3: be together. If there's something that she loves doing, rollerskating 109 00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:51,480 Speaker 3: or riding a bike or going to the beach or whatever, 110 00:05:52,160 --> 00:05:56,800 Speaker 3: just creating the time and the space to distance yourself 111 00:05:56,960 --> 00:06:00,600 Speaker 3: from all the drama that's existing and connect. 112 00:06:00,839 --> 00:06:03,800 Speaker 1: Even hearing you say that, though, something that jumps into 113 00:06:03,800 --> 00:06:05,560 Speaker 1: my mind here is just the value of getting away 114 00:06:05,560 --> 00:06:10,080 Speaker 1: for the weekend, going camping, getting away from everything. We 115 00:06:10,360 --> 00:06:12,960 Speaker 1: don't do a great job of this. We're so busy, 116 00:06:13,000 --> 00:06:16,719 Speaker 1: we're so hurried. Love is spelled time to a child, 117 00:06:17,760 --> 00:06:21,760 Speaker 1: but what is hurry? Spell? And when we're correcting, directing, 118 00:06:21,839 --> 00:06:24,240 Speaker 1: taking away agency, taking away a sense of control in 119 00:06:24,320 --> 00:06:26,760 Speaker 1: their lives because we're taking control ourselves because we're so 120 00:06:26,800 --> 00:06:29,480 Speaker 1: ticked off because they're upsetting us and nothing's working out. 121 00:06:29,680 --> 00:06:31,560 Speaker 1: This is really challenging to hear, but as parents, we've 122 00:06:31,600 --> 00:06:33,719 Speaker 1: literally got to do the opposite of what we want 123 00:06:33,800 --> 00:06:34,920 Speaker 1: to do in these situations. 124 00:06:34,920 --> 00:06:35,400 Speaker 3: That's right. 125 00:06:35,800 --> 00:06:37,200 Speaker 1: If you want to speed it up, you've got to 126 00:06:37,200 --> 00:06:38,880 Speaker 1: slow it down. You want to get into control, You've 127 00:06:38,920 --> 00:06:41,479 Speaker 1: got to step back and give them voice. These things 128 00:06:41,520 --> 00:06:44,200 Speaker 1: are really really hard. Now after the break, there are 129 00:06:44,200 --> 00:06:46,480 Speaker 1: two other things that we've really got to talk about 130 00:06:46,680 --> 00:06:56,480 Speaker 1: that could definitely move the needle. Okay, so in love 131 00:06:56,480 --> 00:06:59,039 Speaker 1: of year old girl who's having a really big challenge. 132 00:06:59,320 --> 00:07:03,000 Speaker 1: My centraal thesis here, my main hypothesis is that basic 133 00:07:03,040 --> 00:07:07,560 Speaker 1: psychological needs are being stomped on by well intentioned but frustrated, harried, exhausted, 134 00:07:07,600 --> 00:07:11,440 Speaker 1: and over at parents who are unfortunately struggling to help 135 00:07:11,520 --> 00:07:13,960 Speaker 1: kids feel connected, help kids feel like they have a 136 00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:16,600 Speaker 1: sense of control, and help kids feel like they're competent 137 00:07:16,640 --> 00:07:17,560 Speaker 1: at anything. 138 00:07:17,520 --> 00:07:20,880 Speaker 3: And almost certainly struggling to manage their own emotions. 139 00:07:20,960 --> 00:07:24,440 Speaker 1: Aroound me, right, that's it. I mean we sit here 140 00:07:24,480 --> 00:07:26,000 Speaker 1: and do this podcasts and we talk about how as 141 00:07:26,040 --> 00:07:27,840 Speaker 1: parents we just need to help the kids with ABC 142 00:07:27,960 --> 00:07:30,440 Speaker 1: and D, but sometimes we're talking to parents who are 143 00:07:30,440 --> 00:07:33,720 Speaker 1: dealing with their own staff, big baggage diagnosis of their 144 00:07:33,720 --> 00:07:38,640 Speaker 1: own anxiety depression ADHD, adult challenges, financial issues, all that 145 00:07:38,680 --> 00:07:41,400 Speaker 1: sort of stuff, and parents just going I can't do it, 146 00:07:41,480 --> 00:07:43,120 Speaker 1: like I don't know how to do it. So that 147 00:07:43,160 --> 00:07:45,360 Speaker 1: brings me to the second thing that I wanted to emphasize. 148 00:07:45,920 --> 00:07:48,120 Speaker 1: When I hear this and I hear Anna's voice, and 149 00:07:48,160 --> 00:07:52,480 Speaker 1: I hear that tiredness, that weariness that I don't know, 150 00:07:52,760 --> 00:07:56,080 Speaker 1: I just don't know anymore, that hopelessness in Anna's voice. 151 00:07:56,640 --> 00:07:59,440 Speaker 1: What I'm really curious about is what are we doing 152 00:07:59,480 --> 00:08:02,040 Speaker 1: as parents? What are we doing as parents that we're 153 00:08:02,080 --> 00:08:04,160 Speaker 1: not aware of, or that we're doing with good intentions, 154 00:08:04,200 --> 00:08:06,200 Speaker 1: but it's actually undermining the very thing that we're trying 155 00:08:06,240 --> 00:08:08,320 Speaker 1: to do. I've just started listening to a pod that 156 00:08:08,320 --> 00:08:09,800 Speaker 1: I've heard about a lot of times. There's a guy 157 00:08:09,800 --> 00:08:15,160 Speaker 1: called Billy Garvey and he's a pediatric neurodevelopmental psychologist, and 158 00:08:15,520 --> 00:08:17,680 Speaker 1: I'm listening to the conversations he's having very much like 159 00:08:17,680 --> 00:08:20,080 Speaker 1: the conversations we have. It's almost like we're the same podcast. 160 00:08:20,120 --> 00:08:22,840 Speaker 1: But he's got a more medical focus. I've got a 161 00:08:22,840 --> 00:08:26,520 Speaker 1: more psychological focus. But as I'm listening to him talk 162 00:08:26,600 --> 00:08:29,440 Speaker 1: to his co host Nick, I'm hearing this dad Nick, 163 00:08:29,440 --> 00:08:32,240 Speaker 1: Who's saying, Yeah, I did this, and Billy's like, it's wrong, 164 00:08:32,960 --> 00:08:34,920 Speaker 1: You're doing it wrong. You've got the best intentions, and 165 00:08:34,960 --> 00:08:37,000 Speaker 1: it makes sense, Like logically, it makes sense that you're 166 00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:39,520 Speaker 1: doing it, But how's this perceived for your child? And 167 00:08:39,559 --> 00:08:41,440 Speaker 1: as I'm listening to Anna and I'm thinking about what's 168 00:08:41,480 --> 00:08:45,040 Speaker 1: going on, I can't help. I don't want to shame parents. 169 00:08:45,080 --> 00:08:46,880 Speaker 1: I don't want to say you're doing it wrong. But 170 00:08:46,920 --> 00:08:48,760 Speaker 1: what I'm actually saying is you're probably doing it wrong, 171 00:08:48,960 --> 00:08:51,160 Speaker 1: because most of us are. When our children are having 172 00:08:51,240 --> 00:08:53,840 Speaker 1: these kinds of challenges. We're stepping in with the best 173 00:08:53,840 --> 00:08:56,760 Speaker 1: of intentions, but we're undermining the things that I need 174 00:08:56,800 --> 00:09:00,480 Speaker 1: the most. Thinking that we're fixing it. I'm actually going 175 00:09:00,480 --> 00:09:02,720 Speaker 1: to suggest that, not that I'm trying to flog a book. 176 00:09:02,760 --> 00:09:04,160 Speaker 1: I make three bucks on a book, right, like the 177 00:09:04,200 --> 00:09:06,240 Speaker 1: publisher takes all the money. But get a copy of 178 00:09:06,240 --> 00:09:08,360 Speaker 1: my book Misconnection. It will show you how to do 179 00:09:08,400 --> 00:09:14,120 Speaker 1: it right. It'll show you how to step into need support, 180 00:09:14,360 --> 00:09:17,079 Speaker 1: and I think it'll make a difference. There's one last 181 00:09:17,080 --> 00:09:20,360 Speaker 1: thing to wrap up with. Lately, I've been doing a 182 00:09:20,360 --> 00:09:22,560 Speaker 1: lot of listening, a lot of reading, a lot of 183 00:09:22,640 --> 00:09:28,240 Speaker 1: learning around how so much of the psychological drama that 184 00:09:28,360 --> 00:09:31,440 Speaker 1: we and our children experience in our lives has to 185 00:09:31,480 --> 00:09:34,680 Speaker 1: do with nothing psychological at all. It has to do 186 00:09:34,720 --> 00:09:37,480 Speaker 1: with lifestyle factors, like what we're eating, and how much 187 00:09:37,520 --> 00:09:40,960 Speaker 1: we're sleeping, how much we're moving our body, what our 188 00:09:41,000 --> 00:09:43,560 Speaker 1: friendships are like, and how much nature we're getting. 189 00:09:44,320 --> 00:09:47,720 Speaker 3: And I just wonder she clearly hasn't shared it with us, 190 00:09:47,720 --> 00:09:51,479 Speaker 3: but I wonder whether or not her daughter has screens. 191 00:09:51,920 --> 00:09:53,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, at eleven. 192 00:09:55,320 --> 00:09:58,240 Speaker 3: We've watched it with so many of our friends and 193 00:09:58,800 --> 00:10:04,040 Speaker 3: their children. Earlier we introduce hand how devices to our children, 194 00:10:04,720 --> 00:10:08,320 Speaker 3: the bigger the detrimental impact it has on them. 195 00:10:08,400 --> 00:10:11,559 Speaker 1: So that's anecdotally. I've actually got the evidence. There's some 196 00:10:11,800 --> 00:10:13,920 Speaker 1: research out of a place in the States called the 197 00:10:13,920 --> 00:10:17,720 Speaker 1: Sapiens Lab, and they've gone to a great, big cohort 198 00:10:17,720 --> 00:10:19,440 Speaker 1: of eighteen to twenty four year olds. They've done a 199 00:10:19,440 --> 00:10:22,480 Speaker 1: well being test, mental health quotient, and there's just us 200 00:10:22,480 --> 00:10:24,920 Speaker 1: one question in there about screens. How old were you 201 00:10:24,960 --> 00:10:28,880 Speaker 1: when you were first given your very own first handheld device? 202 00:10:29,480 --> 00:10:32,720 Speaker 1: And they found that there's this remarkably strong correlation, especially 203 00:10:32,720 --> 00:10:36,200 Speaker 1: for girls. The younger she gets given that device, the 204 00:10:36,240 --> 00:10:39,840 Speaker 1: greater the mental health challenges she experiences in her early twenties. 205 00:10:40,559 --> 00:10:42,640 Speaker 1: So when you're dealing with an with an eleven year 206 00:10:42,679 --> 00:10:45,000 Speaker 1: old who's moving from a play based childhood to a 207 00:10:45,000 --> 00:10:48,720 Speaker 1: screen based childhood. To use Jonathan Hat's words, her relationships 208 00:10:48,720 --> 00:10:52,079 Speaker 1: are changing, she's not getting as much physical activity, her 209 00:10:52,080 --> 00:10:54,400 Speaker 1: body's changed, her body is changing, She's probably not getting 210 00:10:54,400 --> 00:10:57,320 Speaker 1: as much high qualities sleep because of the screens as well. 211 00:10:57,400 --> 00:10:58,960 Speaker 1: I'm not saying that it's a screen thing. I'm saying 212 00:10:58,960 --> 00:11:00,839 Speaker 1: this could be part of it. All those other factors 213 00:11:00,880 --> 00:11:03,840 Speaker 1: are linked to screens. They also apply even if screens 214 00:11:03,920 --> 00:11:06,640 Speaker 1: aren't the issue. So let me save them again. Quality 215 00:11:06,679 --> 00:11:13,319 Speaker 1: of relationships at home and at school, fiscal activity, sleep, nutrition. 216 00:11:14,080 --> 00:11:16,120 Speaker 1: The more food she eats that comes out of a packet, 217 00:11:16,920 --> 00:11:19,719 Speaker 1: the worse it's going to be for her brain, inflammation 218 00:11:19,800 --> 00:11:23,200 Speaker 1: in her body, and her psychology. So these are the 219 00:11:23,200 --> 00:11:25,000 Speaker 1: things that I'd be looking at, and if we had 220 00:11:25,000 --> 00:11:27,559 Speaker 1: more info, we could be more precise. This is pretty general, 221 00:11:28,080 --> 00:11:30,600 Speaker 1: but hopefully this gives you and any other parent whose 222 00:11:30,679 --> 00:11:33,680 Speaker 1: children are just driving them bonkers right now, a handful 223 00:11:33,720 --> 00:11:36,800 Speaker 1: of things to play with. I love tricky questions, Thanks 224 00:11:36,840 --> 00:11:38,800 Speaker 1: so much for asking. If you've got a tricky question, 225 00:11:38,880 --> 00:11:42,199 Speaker 1: please send us an email. Podcasts at happy families dot 226 00:11:42,200 --> 00:11:44,600 Speaker 1: com you with a voice note, and we'll do our 227 00:11:44,600 --> 00:11:46,960 Speaker 1: best to answer your tricky questions. You can literally ask 228 00:11:47,040 --> 00:11:49,040 Speaker 1: us anything, or we would love for you to visit 229 00:11:49,040 --> 00:11:52,000 Speaker 1: our website. We've got this really simple to use solution online, 230 00:11:52,080 --> 00:11:55,080 Speaker 1: Happy families dot com dot You just scroll down to podcasts, 231 00:11:55,200 --> 00:11:58,240 Speaker 1: click the record button and start talking. Tell us your 232 00:11:58,440 --> 00:12:02,000 Speaker 1: big challenge. Families podcast is produced by Justin Rowland from 233 00:12:02,000 --> 00:12:04,480 Speaker 1: Bridge Media. If you'd like more information and resources to 234 00:12:04,520 --> 00:12:07,120 Speaker 1: make your family happier, you'll find them at happy families 235 00:12:07,200 --> 00:12:10,480 Speaker 1: dot com dot A you