Speaker 1: Life Uncut podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout
Speaker 1: Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We
Speaker 1: pay our respect to their elders past and present and
Speaker 1: extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander
Speaker 1: people's today.
Speaker 2: This episode is recorded on Gadigal Land of the Aurora Nation.
Speaker 2: Hi guys, and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut.
Speaker 1: I'm Laura and I'm Brutney, and this is a wild,
Speaker 1: wild Saturday radio show. We are not that wild. We
Speaker 1: are having well, I mean, not for you. I have
Speaker 1: a bottle of champagne in my hand.
Speaker 2: I'm wearing a bride to be veil and I have
Speaker 2: a sash.
Speaker 1: What does it even say? Also bride to be? Well,
Speaker 1: I mean, what do you Okay, what do you want
Speaker 1: me to write on it? You're literally the bride to
Speaker 1: be But it's Laura one penis for life. That's what
Speaker 1: I wanted. Brittany Hockley one penis. That's back at the Hens.
Speaker 1: It is Laura's Hens Party weekend. So this is our
Speaker 1: Saturday radio show. So we had to interrupt this weekend
Speaker 1: away so we could come do the radio show, and
Speaker 1: now we go to revisit the Hen.
Speaker 2: If you've been watching across socials like you would know
Speaker 2: that this all started on Friday Saturday Radio. And then
Speaker 2: we're leaving radio to go and actually be one with
Speaker 2: the strippers. I don't actually know what's happening, but you
Speaker 2: know what, it's been a whild ride.
Speaker 1: Well, we did kick Mitch off the radio show today
Speaker 1: because it was a Hen's party only show. Well and
Speaker 1: because he called in six so that was the other
Speaker 1: reason why he couldn't enjoy it. But even if he
Speaker 1: wasn't sick, he wasn't allowed. You can't see with us.
Speaker 2: We have such a great show lined up for you
Speaker 2: today though. Okay, so we wanted to know we unpack
Speaker 2: what are the worst Hen's horror stories that you've ever experienced?
Speaker 2: And let me tell you, I'm just hoping that mine
Speaker 2: is nothing like yours.
Speaker 1: Well, you definitely there were a number of broken bones.
Speaker 1: You do not want to break a bone when your
Speaker 1: wedding is only a few weeks. It's only five weeks,
Speaker 1: it's five weeks away.
Speaker 2: That's insane, I know, especially because I have so many
Speaker 2: things that are not planned or booked in yet. Ex
Speaker 2: give me wild levels of anxiety, like it fluctuates through
Speaker 2: my body.
Speaker 1: Yes, absolutely, I think you should be worried. And then
Speaker 1: I like to pretend like it didn't happen, and then
Speaker 1: they get worried again. I'm supposed to soothe you. You
Speaker 1: should be worried. We also have Darren McMullin Stop Hing by.
Speaker 1: Darren McMullen is the host of the new I don't
Speaker 1: know if you guys been watching it is the new
Speaker 1: Love Show. He's or Laura, and Laura's gave him a
Speaker 1: what name did you give him? The Captain of Love?
Speaker 2: No, I think I said he was the I don't
Speaker 2: even know. I mean he is a Captain of Love
Speaker 2: because he's on the love boat.
Speaker 1: The show is called The Real Love Boat and it's
Speaker 1: put in just like really hot, young sexy beep on
Speaker 1: a boat in the Mediterranean, giving them some cocktails, letting
Speaker 1: them float around and do whatever happens. And I think,
Speaker 1: like this sounds I mean amazing, yes, but wild.
Speaker 2: Also speaking to Darren, he makes himself sound like he's
Speaker 2: like the old man of the boat.
Speaker 1: He was like, no, I'm too old for these people.
Speaker 1: I just walked around and parted my life advice on
Speaker 1: them all. Bro, you don't even have ten years on us.
Speaker 2: Like you're fine, You're like forty, you'll be fine. And
Speaker 2: plenty of forty year olds are dating twenty year olds.
Speaker 2: I mean, look at Leonardo DiCaprio.
Speaker 1: Also my supermarket saga, you know this dating supermarket.
Speaker 2: I'm talking about it for weeks, literally three weeks now,
Speaker 2: Britt and her like her plea to find a man
Speaker 2: in Woolworth.
Speaker 1: Well, it's gone viral. You're welcome. It's made it to
Speaker 1: the UK. There's been some articles about it. I've had
Speaker 1: lots of people sending it to me. So we're gonna
Speaker 1: unpack whether it actually works because we've been talking about it.
Speaker 1: Was it a myth? Does it actually? Is there a success?
Speaker 1: I don't know, because you never know.
Speaker 2: There is currently a Daily Mail article which we do
Speaker 2: talk about, and I just I'm pulling it back up, Britt.
Speaker 2: There's now a hundred comments on this Daily Mail article. No, no,
Speaker 2: that doesn't sound like a lot. But usually on any
Speaker 2: Daily Mail article there's like one or two unless it's
Speaker 2: about Mega Markel.
Speaker 1: But this is at like, people are caring so much
Speaker 1: about this that it's fucking weird. Yeah, but There's also
Speaker 1: a lot of people like get a grip girl and
Speaker 1: go to university, get an education. I'm like, hey, lucky,
Speaker 1: I do you have an education? But that's it. Loads
Speaker 1: coming up on the show. We hope you have as
Speaker 1: much fun today as we have had partying in studio today.
Speaker 1: All right, let's get into the show right around Australia,
Speaker 1: The Life on Cut Radio show with Britt Hockey and
Speaker 1: Laura Burne and Laura it is your Hands weekend. You
Speaker 1: have come in, actually it started last night. You've taken
Speaker 1: a break, You've come in. This is how much I
Speaker 1: love this show. I couldn't even take Actually, they wouldn't
Speaker 1: let me take a Saturday off. I tried and they said, well,
Speaker 1: if you want time off for your wedding, you can't
Speaker 1: take today off. So well yeah.
Speaker 2: Also, can I just say, Missy, our producer brought in
Speaker 2: champagne this morning and it is a very interesting color.
Speaker 2: It has zero and it is flat and very yellow. Look,
Speaker 2: it's a beautiful champagne. Thank you so much producing, Missy.
Speaker 2: We are grateful.
Speaker 1: What else you can be grateful for is I've got
Speaker 1: you some things to wear today. It's your hens party.
Speaker 1: I've got you a sash. I've got your beautiful sash
Speaker 1: here that says bride to be. I've got you a
Speaker 1: little late headband with a veil. So I'm just going
Speaker 1: to quickly keep those tune. Now, do I have to
Speaker 1: wear this for the whole show?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 1: The whole show? Okay, hold on, all right, I've got
Speaker 1: a little bride tribe, so I'll like bride tribe. I
Speaker 1: can't wear, can't fet it on over my headphones. Put
Speaker 1: your sash on? Wow? And to kick off the hens,
Speaker 1: we have a game now, I called Manny J. I
Speaker 1: want to know how well you know each other? So
Speaker 1: I've asked Manny J some questions and I want you
Speaker 1: to answer them, and we've got to see if you
Speaker 1: get the same answer. I forget. They know him very well.
Speaker 1: I spend a lot of time with him.
Speaker 2: Missus laughing at me right now because she can't take
Speaker 2: me seriously?
Speaker 1: But did he know you do? I look good? Though?
Speaker 1: This is what I want to know. I'm just hoping
Speaker 1: this is what you wear on your actual wedding day.
Speaker 1: All right, We're going to kick this off. How well
Speaker 1: do you know each other? Aka? Should you get married?
Speaker 1: Maried Laura Ben who is your celebrity crush. Now that's
Speaker 1: what Matt. What you think Matt will say?
Speaker 2: I reckon, he probably said himself, But let's go with
Speaker 2: Jason Momoa.
Speaker 1: Is maje j celebrity I didn't say that.
Speaker 4: Yeah, without question, would be Jason Momoa, which is very
Speaker 4: concerning because he's about one hundred and ten kilos, long
Speaker 4: hair and a beard very different to how I look.
Speaker 1: He's also in Bondie at the moment. He was at
Speaker 1: my house last night. Yes, Laura, what would your last
Speaker 1: meal be tonight? You're on death row tomorrow. What are
Speaker 1: you gonna eat tonight? It's Thai?
Speaker 2: It would be a Hyu beef salad from grab Tye
Speaker 2: in bond.
Speaker 4: Laura's last meal would be Okay, there's two options here.
Speaker 4: The first would be a Thaie chicken stir fry.
Speaker 1: With peanut sauceas but not it or.
Speaker 4: Not to put tickets on myself. But she does like
Speaker 4: my chicken pie very good dish Okay.
Speaker 1: I thought he was going to say the pro pasta.
Speaker 2: He does make a very good prom past His chicken
Speaker 2: pie is also very good, but I kind of sometimes
Speaker 2: encourage him to make it when I'm lazy and I
Speaker 2: want him to cook, so I think I've overinflated how
Speaker 2: much I like it, just so he'll do it for me.
Speaker 5: All right.
Speaker 1: Favorite sex position Laura burn missionary.
Speaker 4: Laura's favorite sex position I think would be I don't
Speaker 4: want to make us sound really beige here, but it
Speaker 4: would be missionary. I think ninety five percent of the
Speaker 4: time that we have sex, it's missionary.
Speaker 1: But it just works.
Speaker 4: If it's not broke, don't try and fix it.
Speaker 1: It's the best seven minutes of my life. Baby, don't
Speaker 1: worry seven, he said. Three, Laura, what's your pet peeve?
Speaker 2: My pet peeve would have to be when well, one,
Speaker 2: when Matt leaves is closing the floor. But also Matt
Speaker 2: has no calms with farting at any time anywhere, it
Speaker 2: doesn't matter where I am.
Speaker 1: His farting is my biggest pet peeve.
Speaker 4: I think there's two for pet peeve.
Speaker 5: One would be.
Speaker 4: Whatever I brush my teeth and I have a bit
Speaker 4: of toothpaste foam around my mouth, and I wipe it
Speaker 4: on a towel.
Speaker 5: Laura hates that so much.
Speaker 1: Sure specific when we go to bed.
Speaker 4: And we say good night, and then I start asking
Speaker 4: you a question about anything like the kids or daycare
Speaker 4: or the wedding or anything like that. She hates it.
Speaker 2: But okay, how annoying you guys are not doing very
Speaker 2: well on this.
Speaker 1: How old you know each other? Don't you even know
Speaker 1: whether we we're out to in the tally? Where's the score?
Speaker 1: You're failing? Miserable? I got one right, okay, the very
Speaker 1: last one. This is gonna be make or break. What
Speaker 1: is your worst habit? Oh, I don't know.
Speaker 2: It's not a habit. I reckon he's going to say
Speaker 2: something about my dry feet.
Speaker 1: I have really.
Speaker 2: Dry How do you pick them all the time? Driest feet?
Speaker 2: It's so gross, They're so dry.
Speaker 1: Alway tells me that I'm going to ripped our bed
Speaker 1: sheets with my dry feet, and you've got your own
Speaker 1: Wiki feet page is beyond me because they can't tell
Speaker 1: texture from the photos.
Speaker 2: They can't see just how deep those crevicess go.
Speaker 4: Laura's worst habit. I mean, it's very difficult for me
Speaker 4: to pick a worst habit for Laura, because as we
Speaker 4: all know, she is perfect, thank you. But if I
Speaker 4: had to pick something, it would be the fact that
Speaker 4: it takes her between four to six hours to drink
Speaker 4: a cup of coffee. Or it would be the fact
Speaker 4: that whenever I make her a this is going as
Speaker 4: far back to when we first started dating, she only
Speaker 4: ever takes I would say, three SIPs and then let's
Speaker 4: it go cold, and then she forgets about it.
Speaker 1: Look, I mean yesterday I bought your coffee and you
Speaker 1: had to reheat it five times. It was a five
Speaker 1: hour coffee. I don't mind drinking a cold tea of
Speaker 1: cold coffee.
Speaker 2: But also I'm really glad that we decided to like
Speaker 2: I baby trapped to two children prior to getting married
Speaker 2: because he doesn't have a say in it anyway, Lucky lock.
Speaker 1: Him down because you sound hideous. No, I think that.
Speaker 1: I think. Look, I think you got more wrong than right.
Speaker 1: But I'm going to also allow this wedding to go
Speaker 1: forward because I love the both of you. Thank you
Speaker 1: so much for giving us your blessing.
Speaker 2: This late in the piece, Brittany, Now it is time
Speaker 2: for fucking strange.
Speaker 1: That is the funniest sting I have ever heard. That
Speaker 1: intro from Britbusters. This is new thing you're going to do, Spritbusters. Well,
Speaker 1: it just happened very organically. Isn't that a good word? Organic?
Speaker 1: Like fruit? Organic?
Speaker 2: That's gonna be our first myth a little look we're
Speaker 2: going to start.
Speaker 1: This came off the back of something we spoke about
Speaker 1: the last few weeks about like this is this supermarket
Speaker 1: dating a thing? That was a question we had right
Speaker 1: Laura in the last two weeks, this going into a
Speaker 1: supermarket and putting your bananas upright? Does that signal you single?
Speaker 2: Well, for anyone who doesn't know, Brittany came in last
Speaker 2: week and she said that there's a brand new dating
Speaker 2: phenomena that you can go into your coals or your willies, go.
Speaker 1: Into your coals or your woolies.
Speaker 2: You put your bananas upright in the trolley, in the
Speaker 2: front of your trolley, and that means that you're open
Speaker 2: to a relationship and there is some like very classic
Speaker 2: dating signals that you can kind of lean into.
Speaker 1: Well, it was a question, it was like, is this
Speaker 1: a thing, is this a myth or a legend? Is
Speaker 1: this real or not?
Speaker 2: And then we said Brittany did to go away and
Speaker 2: try it for herself in real life. But in the
Speaker 2: meantime there's also been a wonderful article that's come out
Speaker 2: in the Daily Mail UK of course, the Secret Language
Speaker 2: of Supermarket Dating. Brittany Hockley reveals the codes and special
Speaker 2: trolley items that signal you want to pick up on
Speaker 2: the grocery run you are welcome.
Speaker 1: Not all heroes were capes. Some of them have bananas.
Speaker 1: Did you go? Did you do it? What happened? I
Speaker 1: hear the four one way K. I need to tell you.
Speaker 1: I did an online shop, so it didn't work, but
Speaker 1: I was routing long time. I had calls deliver, but
Speaker 1: I did do my due diligence. I put it out
Speaker 1: to the listeners. I put it out to everybody, and
Speaker 1: I said, has this ever happened to you? Do you
Speaker 1: know anyone that's happened to?
Speaker 5: Other?
Speaker 1: Success stories? And I am so happy to report there
Speaker 1: are success stories. We had people writing in. This has
Speaker 1: been around since the sixties apparently, and if you do
Speaker 1: your research, it is. But I had people write in
Speaker 1: saying that their grandparents got together in the fruit all
Speaker 1: because of having bananas in the trolley. So I think
Speaker 1: that's absolutely brilliant. I'm just not sure if the specific
Speaker 1: supermarkets you can only go to. Okay, I'm still dumbfounded
Speaker 1: though that this made international news one of my favorite
Speaker 1: and I want to read this out. This is a
Speaker 1: comment that's on the article.
Speaker 2: It says, as a single, middle aged man, I can't
Speaker 2: help but feel my basket that contains a microwave ready
Speaker 2: meal for one, a bottle of lubricant, a box of tissues,
Speaker 2: and a woman's weekly edition magazine featuring Australian women Olympic
Speaker 2: swimmers might give.
Speaker 1: The jig up.
Speaker 2: There's a few other things in the shopping center that
Speaker 2: my indie, Kate, where you're at in your relationship?
Speaker 1: This man is fine. The single flag loud and proud.
Speaker 1: Hang on, Becky, we have Becky on the line. Becky,
Speaker 1: where can you just call me from? Please tell me
Speaker 1: your call from a supermarket?
Speaker 6: No, not right now. But I thought it was so
Speaker 6: funny that you guys are talking about this because I
Speaker 6: didn't know it was a thing. And funny enough. That's
Speaker 6: how I met my now partner.
Speaker 1: Okay, wait, but how as in like what happened? What
Speaker 1: was that? What piece of fruit was in the trough?
Speaker 1: Was there a rock hard banana?
Speaker 6: Yes, it was a banana. I was just in my
Speaker 6: usual weekly shop and this man just approaches me. Okay,
Speaker 6: so just picture as well. I've got some ripe bananas
Speaker 6: sitting in my front tray and comes straight to me
Speaker 6: and he goes, hey, like, there's some nice bananas you
Speaker 6: got there, and I was like, whoa, where did you
Speaker 6: come from? And why you talk about my bananas? We
Speaker 6: just kind of hit it off though. He just kept
Speaker 6: talking to me. We started exchanging numbers, and then on
Speaker 6: our first date, I was like, Hey, what was with
Speaker 6: the banana thing? Like it was pretty forward of you
Speaker 6: to just start commenting.
Speaker 2: On my pa. I think he was that like that
Speaker 2: sounds to me like a sexually it sounds like he's
Speaker 2: trying to be suggested about other things.
Speaker 6: I was a bit taken aback by it. Well, then
Speaker 6: he explained to me the whole banana situation means you're single,
Speaker 6: and I was like, what, I've never heard of that.
Speaker 6: So apparently it's kind of old school, but it's coming back.
Speaker 6: I don't even know. But we've been together for a
Speaker 6: while now.
Speaker 1: This is brilliant, So it does work. It's just that
Speaker 1: some people don't know what's happening, like yourself.
Speaker 2: There we go one and our very first Britbusters off
Speaker 2: the ranks. Do you know what something else I wanted
Speaker 2: to talk about? And coming up Kanye West? Or do
Speaker 2: we call him Yee now, well ms not Kanye. It's
Speaker 2: technically it's legally Yee.
Speaker 1: It's yea, all right, well yea.
Speaker 2: Now the Paris Fashion Show which was on this week,
Speaker 2: there was one show in particular, it was the Balenciaga
Speaker 2: Secret Fashion Show that has us talking and we have
Speaker 2: a few feelings about it.
Speaker 1: It's very controversial, a little bit tone deaf. I have
Speaker 1: some feelings, but that's coming up next week.
Speaker 2: It was Paris Fashion Week this week and there has
Speaker 2: been one particular fashion show. Well, actually, I think it's
Speaker 2: one particular person that has caused quite the uproar.
Speaker 1: I feel like it's always one particular person that he's
Speaker 1: causing the uproar. It is Kanye West. Well, previously known
Speaker 1: as Kanye West, we now call him ye now.
Speaker 2: It started off there was a Balenciaga Secret fashion show
Speaker 2: and it kind of looked like a war zone. It
Speaker 2: didn't really have There wasn't a lot of information that
Speaker 2: has come out around like the purpose of it, what
Speaker 2: was the theming behind it.
Speaker 1: Well, it looked like a big muddy battlefield. That is,
Speaker 1: from an outside perspective looking in, that's what it was like.
Speaker 1: A battlefield, a war zone. It looked gloomy, dark, ominous.
Speaker 1: It was not, and I didn't get a good vibe
Speaker 1: from it. Oh no, no one did.
Speaker 2: There was a massive trench that was dug out in
Speaker 2: the middle of it, which was meant to look like
Speaker 2: a huge grave, and the whole experience around this show
Speaker 2: was that you were meant to feel like you're walking
Speaker 2: through the terrain of a battlefield, which which I think,
Speaker 2: in the political climate of what is going on in
Speaker 2: the world at the moment, is very tone deaf when
Speaker 2: it doesn't seem like there was a true, like political
Speaker 2: reason behind it. It's not like Balenciaga has come out
Speaker 2: and said, look, this is the state when we were
Speaker 2: trying to make it just feels like it's glamorizing war.
Speaker 1: I find this a little bit disgusting in bad taste
Speaker 1: and tone death and I'm I don't love Kanye West anyway,
Speaker 1: but I thoroughly dislike the man. Now he's tipped me
Speaker 1: over the edge. You know what, though, you have to
Speaker 1: give him props. Now he's not very many props. You
Speaker 1: can give him. The props he's not.
Speaker 2: Getting props I'm giving him is that he's very good
Speaker 2: at keeping relevant, like he's very good at drumming up
Speaker 2: as much media attention as possible, and I think it's
Speaker 2: the old adage of like, you know, even bad publicity
Speaker 2: is good publicity, right.
Speaker 1: Okay, Usually I would say yes, and he's very, very
Speaker 1: good at that, but I think he has gone too far.
Speaker 2: Now.
Speaker 1: This is really pushing his white supremacy ideology, which he
Speaker 1: has done multiple times in the past, and usually people
Speaker 1: are on board with him, celebrity friends, everyone, everyone gives
Speaker 1: him a bit of a pass and they're like, Okay,
Speaker 1: we get why he did it. People have turned against
Speaker 1: him on this. There've been a lot of people coming
Speaker 1: out making their statements saying, we are not on board
Speaker 1: with you anymore. You've gone one step too far.
Speaker 2: Well, that is because the second part of the show.
Speaker 2: So obviously there was the Blenciaga show that had a
Speaker 2: bit of controversy around it, But then the real thing
Speaker 2: that everyone's been talking about this week is that for
Speaker 2: his own Yeasy show, he came wearing a white Lives
Speaker 2: Matters T shirt. Now, I don't I mean, and he
Speaker 2: hasn't made a lot of statements off the back of
Speaker 2: it to say what the purpose was for it, but
Speaker 2: it was alongside canus Owen. She is a right winged
Speaker 2: political commentator, so I think anyone can read between the
Speaker 2: lines of what the point is that he was trying
Speaker 2: to make here. But it just really delegitimizes how much
Speaker 2: of the conversation that's been happening this year around the
Speaker 2: Black Lives Matters movement, and it causes so much confusion.
Speaker 2: And something that's happened this week off the back of
Speaker 2: it is that because of him wearing this shirt, because
Speaker 2: he holds such power in pop culture, the hashtag of
Speaker 2: white Lives Matters has been trending across the world, and
Speaker 2: I think that that is the real powerful part of this.
Speaker 2: Like of course politics and fashion, they can emulate each other.
Speaker 2: They linked in at different times. But I think him
Speaker 2: being so powerful, but him also being so unstable. It's
Speaker 2: well documented that he has bipolar. I think it's a
Speaker 2: really dangerous combination.
Speaker 1: He put on his stories quote. Everyone knows that Black
Speaker 1: Lives Matter was a scam. This this is a common
Speaker 1: theme that has been appearing in Kanye West life for
Speaker 1: quite a while.
Speaker 2: I honestly don't think that he realized just how much
Speaker 2: negative backlash. Like I think he was trying to get
Speaker 2: a reaction with this statement, but I don't think he
Speaker 2: realized how much negative backlash he would have received, because
Speaker 2: what I find really interesting is what's happened in the
Speaker 2: last couple of days, and it's been his reaction to
Speaker 2: the backlash.
Speaker 1: Instead of him acknowledging the T shirt.
Speaker 2: He's tried to deflect the whole situation around his custody
Speaker 2: battles with Kim Kardashian, which I think trying to like
Speaker 2: change the narrative so that the press and the media
Speaker 2: have something else to focus on. And throwing your ex
Speaker 2: wife under the bus. There's another there's another notch on
Speaker 2: the hugely problematic belt that is Ye, he's a key deflector.
Speaker 1: But he's pissed everyone off, even even the fashion week Ey,
Speaker 1: and I'm not even into fashion week. I am ticked off.
Speaker 1: We could talk about this forever and we don't want
Speaker 1: to be on here having winds.
Speaker 2: Well, you know, it's been a big week in political
Speaker 2: fashion statements. You know what else has been a big
Speaker 2: week in Brittan and I. We had the launch of
Speaker 2: our very first and only book that we've written together.
Speaker 1: Only and last.
Speaker 2: It's called We Love Love and We would Love to
Speaker 2: tell you a little bit about some of some of
Speaker 2: the deeper parts that you wouldn't have heard about. Britt
Speaker 2: has a few very special stories in there, and I
Speaker 2: also have a few things.
Speaker 6: You know.
Speaker 1: Some of it's got to do with being in the bedroom. Now.
Speaker 2: It is a very big Saturday today because both Britta
Speaker 2: and I have a glass of champagne in her hands.
Speaker 1: You have a bride to be veil in your hair,
Speaker 1: you have a sash watertime.
Speaker 2: To be alive Hen's party, which you know I didn't
Speaker 2: opt to have my Hen's party at work. We've left
Speaker 2: my Hen's party and come to work, but you know,
Speaker 2: we're talking about it just before horror Hen's parties. And
Speaker 2: then I remembered a girlfriend of mine just two weeks
Speaker 2: ago she had her Hen's party, and I mean, we're
Speaker 2: more like a work acquaintance. So I wasn't at this
Speaker 2: Hen's party, but she was home by seven pm because
Speaker 2: she went so hard so fast that from three o'clock
Speaker 2: to seven o'clock she was so legless that.
Speaker 1: She had to go home and be tucked into bed.
Speaker 1: I think that this is a thing. It was my
Speaker 1: sister's hens just two weeks ago, and we started at
Speaker 1: midday and I think it was probably I mean we
Speaker 1: went further than that, maybe nine thirty pm, maybe ten
Speaker 1: five at a stretch, but like we called it, we
Speaker 1: were like, we're all cooked. But it's a that's a
Speaker 1: big that is a big time of drinking.
Speaker 2: Okay, but what do I have in store for me?
Speaker 2: So we're leaving today. We're gonna leave today and we're
Speaker 2: gonna go on the rest of the Hen's party.
Speaker 1: We're leaving. I have a stretch hummer or something with
Speaker 1: some sort of nudity going.
Speaker 2: On, and I want every phallic shaped or like a straw.
Speaker 2: I want a pinata. But also we were talking about
Speaker 2: what are your horror hen stories? Thirteen one oh six five, Shauna.
Speaker 7: I am.
Speaker 3: It was actually my sister's Hens party we did four
Speaker 3: weeks ago. So basically we did some trapeasing up in
Speaker 3: the sky. I don't know if do you guys know
Speaker 3: what peeling is?
Speaker 2: Though? Do you know why I know this because that
Speaker 2: was Maddie Jay's first like group date with Georgia Love.
Speaker 1: They went to peezing like it's like, actually it's like acrobatics, right,
Speaker 1: You're like swinging around.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, that's a very ambitious Hens party. When I'm
Speaker 2: guessing it was a bit of drinking going on.
Speaker 1: It's an athletic for me.
Speaker 3: Well, we thought we could do it, but it turns
Speaker 3: out not so much. So the hen basically went up there,
Speaker 3: she grabbed the bar, then just fell straight onto her leg.
Speaker 3: We thought she might have just sprained it, but turns
Speaker 3: out she actually fractured her her leg. And we're partying
Speaker 3: and everything that night and next day said in her
Speaker 3: whole she.
Speaker 1: Was getting, she was getting, she's a bride.
Speaker 7: Well, the wedding is this week.
Speaker 3: No, so four weeks ago she did it and she
Speaker 3: needs to be in the moon. But for six weeks, oh,
Speaker 3: wedding and honeymoon.
Speaker 2: How did you plan on getting down the aisle? She's
Speaker 2: gonna hobble down or someone's going to carry out.
Speaker 3: Yeah, she's gonna she's going to hobble down.
Speaker 1: Thank you so much.
Speaker 7: Share it.
Speaker 2: We have Georgia on the line. Georgia, what was your
Speaker 2: horror hand story?
Speaker 5: Hey?
Speaker 7: Girls, So look, I was the horror at the hen party,
Speaker 7: and I was also the host of the hen. No,
Speaker 7: I was a bridesmaid hosting at my house.
Speaker 1: What did you do?
Speaker 6: Look?
Speaker 7: My girls were five and one at the time. So
Speaker 7: I peaked bloody early. Okay, I was ready for this
Speaker 7: Hens party by four in the afternoon. In a limo
Speaker 7: back to our house. I filled not one, but two
Speaker 7: champagne flutes with my own vomit.
Speaker 1: I mean, I know, a flute's pretty narrow. I'm looking
Speaker 1: at one now because we are having champagne like that
Speaker 1: is not a lot of vomit. So I feel like
Speaker 1: it's you're not doing too bad.
Speaker 2: I'm actually really impressed by the skill that you had
Speaker 2: to be able to get it into the.
Speaker 7: Flue everywhere else at elegance and grace. I didn't spill
Speaker 7: a drop.
Speaker 1: You'd have to. You would have to put your lips.
Speaker 1: Can you show us, Laura, You'd have to put your
Speaker 1: lips inside of the glass. No, in the Oh my god,
Speaker 1: that was nod in the glass like this.
Speaker 2: Okay, I put mine over the glass anyway, Georgia. How
Speaker 2: did the bride respond to all this?
Speaker 5: Oh?
Speaker 7: Look, she had a great time. This was a COVID
Speaker 7: delayed Hens party, so we were all like ready for
Speaker 7: this Hens party. Okay, there were photos. Everyone just loved it.
Speaker 7: I got brought up in the groom's speech at the
Speaker 7: wedding like it was. I was the entertainment.
Speaker 2: Basically, well, you know what, mom to mum, I feel
Speaker 2: like that could be where I am come three o'clock.
Speaker 1: So I'm very much like, Okay, that is enough. Thank
Speaker 1: you so much, George. We can't scare Laura anymore because
Speaker 1: we've got to go get on this Hen's party started,
Speaker 1: and coming up next, we have Darren McMullen talking love
Speaker 1: for he's the host of the Real Love Boat on ten,
Speaker 1: the brand new show. Laura, have you seen it?
Speaker 2: I've seen the first one, but not the second episode yet,
Speaker 2: and I can't wait to hear what's happening.
Speaker 1: We have the Master of Love, the host of love.
Speaker 2: We've got Darren McMullin, the host of the new ten
Speaker 2: series The Love Boat, which premiated this week.
Speaker 1: Darren, Welcome to life on Color.
Speaker 5: I've always been called the jack master of none. I
Speaker 5: was gonna say master of Love. I will take that.
Speaker 1: How do we think Gosha feels, Laura about you throwing
Speaker 1: that master of love so freely? Do we call Darren
Speaker 1: the Captain of Love? That is far more fitting? Darren?
Speaker 1: Have you found love? Not you found love? Have you
Speaker 1: the book? Have you assisted some couples on the real
Speaker 1: Love Boat with Love. Can you tell us do we
Speaker 1: get happy?
Speaker 5: I would like to have a happy ending. Jesus turned,
Speaker 5: didn't it?
Speaker 1: Does that online podcast?
Speaker 3: Listen?
Speaker 5: Yes? I have before regretfully, I thought it was a
Speaker 5: legitimate massage place. It wasn't.
Speaker 1: Look it happens to the bend was fine.
Speaker 5: I was too far in before I realized. But that
Speaker 5: was a long time ago.
Speaker 1: I don't think you're too far and hang on, there
Speaker 1: are so many puns that we've got to point out here.
Speaker 5: Let's get back to the show. I think, actually, yes,
Speaker 5: we have a tow my knowledge, there are still two
Speaker 5: couples together, and there was a lot with great potential
Speaker 5: that I haven't heard from, so perhaps they're still together
Speaker 5: as well. So there really was something in the era
Speaker 5: in the Mediterranean. But you know, you get a bunch
Speaker 5: of young hot singles cruising around the men in the
Speaker 5: middle of summer and going at amazing destination dates and
Speaker 5: Tuscany and Rome and Marsee's. You know, sparks are are flying.
Speaker 2: Now what is it like for you being the host
Speaker 2: and being stuck on this show when everybody else who
Speaker 2: is in there is single. You're surrounded by beautiful, as
Speaker 2: you said, hot single couples, not even couples yet. Is
Speaker 2: there ever a time where you were like, oh I
Speaker 2: could date one of these an object.
Speaker 5: No, I mean part of it forty So I'm a
Speaker 5: little like the demographic. I mean, most people on the
Speaker 5: show are the twenty maybe early thirties at most, So
Speaker 5: to them, I was like the old guy host.
Speaker 1: You the godfather of the show.
Speaker 5: The godfather, yes, But because of that, they did reach
Speaker 5: out to me a lot of claims. And you know,
Speaker 5: I was very particular about jumping into all situations and
Speaker 5: hearing the moment and being very involved in the show.
Speaker 5: Before I went in, I was aware of who was
Speaker 5: having connections. I was aware of who wasn't. So if
Speaker 5: everyone were face to face and we were, we had
Speaker 5: a decision about who was going to go on the
Speaker 5: destination base or not, and somebody told me a porky pie,
Speaker 5: I could jump in right away and go, well, that's
Speaker 5: actually not true. I watched the whole date and I
Speaker 5: think you're just faking it just to get off the ship.
Speaker 1: So did you call a few people out for being fakes?
Speaker 1: Did you call a few people out saying I don't
Speaker 1: actually believe you're that into that person and you just
Speaker 1: want some scrape.
Speaker 5: Yeah, we have it. We have. As soon as I
Speaker 5: joined the Captain's table, which is coming up at five
Speaker 5: or sent, everything gets shaken up. So essentially that's their
Speaker 5: chance to pitch for the best relationship to go on
Speaker 5: to these destination dates which we have in these wonderful
Speaker 5: money camp buy experiences. And there was a couple of
Speaker 5: people I was aware of at that point that maybe
Speaker 5: weren't there for the right reason. And I just come
Speaker 5: off Celebrity Apprentice, and I think I was channeling my
Speaker 5: inner lord's sugar, and yeah, I really grilled a lot
Speaker 5: of them. I was like, you know what, I think,
Speaker 5: you're absolutely full of crap and you're not good for
Speaker 5: the right reasons. I think probably it was a good
Speaker 5: bagtop situation with Hannah and myself probably being the bad cop,
Speaker 5: and then we've got the lovely duty to come in
Speaker 5: and pick.
Speaker 1: Up the pieces to darn quickfire. Would you be the Bachelor?
Speaker 5: I don't think so. I think most of the relationships
Speaker 5: I've had i've met quite organically, and beyond the apps,
Speaker 5: beyond TV shows. I think the best way to me
Speaker 5: someone is having us through a friend or at a bar,
Speaker 5: or through a hobby of years.
Speaker 1: So now I say, single person, a single person, How
Speaker 1: what does organically mean to you? How are you doing it?
Speaker 1: Because I'm stuck. Someone just told me to go to
Speaker 1: a supermarket fruit department to meet someone. I was like,
Speaker 1: surely I'm not there again, Well, that's that's very la.
Speaker 5: Actually, I think everybody's hanging out in Whole Foods and
Speaker 5: ere one in La Juices. Yeah. Look at all these
Speaker 5: amazing foods I'm cooking up tonight. I've only had some of.
Speaker 3: The cooks for Darren.
Speaker 1: Will you stick around after the break? We want to
Speaker 1: play a game with you that we play with all
Speaker 1: our guests is called headlines. We want you to debunk
Speaker 1: the headlines written about you, so stick around. We'll get
Speaker 1: to that soon.
Speaker 2: Now it is time for this, Why head Lies. Darren McMullen.
Speaker 2: You are the host of tense new series The Real
Speaker 2: Love Boat. We do a game with all our guests
Speaker 2: on the show. It is called head lies, and that
Speaker 2: is your opportunity to debunk some of the headline or
Speaker 2: headlines that have been written about you.
Speaker 1: And you can kick it off with number one.
Speaker 5: All right, just for Donald Trump on this.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yes, yes, absolutely, you can say it is fake
Speaker 2: news that you know what. We know the truth, so
Speaker 2: we may we may hold you accountable.
Speaker 1: Okay. Headline or headline entertainment for Laura Burns Hens party
Speaker 1: is revealed. Darren McMullen to serenade the girls on a
Speaker 1: multimillion dollar yacht on Sydney Harber. It is Laura's Hens today,
Speaker 1: by the way, Darren, Well, I mean I'm waiting for it.
Speaker 1: Is that a headline?
Speaker 5: Are you are you?
Speaker 1: Are you coming to Serenada tonight? You do like being
Speaker 1: on a boat, so I.
Speaker 5: Well, do I ruin the surprise? Well?
Speaker 1: Yeah, maybe maybe we won't.
Speaker 5: Maybe that book, Laura, we're refecting you.
Speaker 1: I don't know if this is having the desired effect.
Speaker 1: I'm just going to put that out there. Sorry, Darren,
Speaker 1: I think a panni just went on.
Speaker 2: All right, Darren McMullen reveals he's meeting women on Instagram.
Speaker 5: That's a lie.
Speaker 2: Oh god, well it apparently it's It's the truth. It's
Speaker 2: a headline from Daily Mail twenty nine Daily Mail, and
Speaker 2: they never love.
Speaker 5: I love how you said it's true because the Daily
Speaker 5: I know she should know.
Speaker 1: We know that they always.
Speaker 5: Tell the inquirer.
Speaker 1: Okay, let's here the masked singers. Prawn is finally exposed.
Speaker 5: That's a headline.
Speaker 1: Okay, we got okay, we got one finally. Yeah, all right,
Speaker 1: I've got one more for you.
Speaker 5: I will say that's a lot worse than it sounds.
Speaker 5: You know, I wasn't exposing myself.
Speaker 1: You didn't exposure prawn, but also my head.
Speaker 5: I exposed my head and not that head sarying.
Speaker 1: You'd hope the headline wasn't exposed prawn and like it'd
Speaker 1: be like exposed whale or something, and prown's a bit smaller.
Speaker 1: Do you know what though, I would be offended by this.
Speaker 1: You know, the old saying about a prawn.
Speaker 2: It's like pull the head off and the body's okay, Darren,
Speaker 2: I would have a problem with that.
Speaker 5: No one the opposite. My body is absolutely horrendous.
Speaker 2: And my faces Okay, then you take what you can get, right, Okay,
Speaker 2: all right, Ossie TV host to Darren McMullin and the
Speaker 2: blocks Ronnie spark up new romance.
Speaker 5: And that's an absolute headline.
Speaker 1: Oh and why is that? Yeah, that seems like there's
Speaker 1: some singing.
Speaker 5: There absolutely no love lost between me and Ronnie from
Speaker 5: the block about is for sure darn.
Speaker 2: Thank you so much for joining us on the show.
Speaker 2: We've loved speaking for you. And if you want to
Speaker 2: watch The Real love Boat as every Wednesday and Thursday
Speaker 2: at seven thirty on ten up.
Speaker 1: Next, we have Confessionals, where for some reason, you guys
Speaker 1: want to vent and tell us your deepest, darkest secrets. Look,
Speaker 1: we're not mad about it because they're pretty fun. Nick Laura,
Speaker 1: can I say you look magnificent today? You've what have
Speaker 1: you done with your hair? Here? Do you like my
Speaker 1: little veil? Actually?
Speaker 2: What have I done with my hair? You made me
Speaker 2: wear this for the entire show? If you have just
Speaker 2: joined us, This weekend is my Hen's party, and I
Speaker 2: rocked up today and I've been given a sash, I've
Speaker 2: been given a veil. I was given a glass of champagne.
Speaker 2: I'm not complaining about that part of it, but yeah,
Speaker 2: it has been.
Speaker 1: A very good day. Your sash has glitter on it.
Speaker 1: It's catching my eye ites catching a light. The veil
Speaker 1: is I mean, I can only hope that that is
Speaker 1: similar to the actual wedding veil you are.
Speaker 2: I might think I'm either a spectacle or it looks
Speaker 2: spectacular one of the two.
Speaker 1: The line is very blur. Why can't they go hand
Speaker 1: in hand? That's what I want to know. Why can't they?
Speaker 7: All?
Speaker 1: Right, it is time for a favorite segment. We haven't
Speaker 1: done it in a while, but I'm thinking now is
Speaker 1: the time forgive me father. I have seen life one
Speaker 1: cuts confessionals, Confessional. This is confessionals.
Speaker 5: Now.
Speaker 1: We get so many people writing the weird and wonderful
Speaker 1: to life on cut.
Speaker 2: Well, we get so many Often we get questions. We
Speaker 2: do ask guncut where you guys write in your devas
Speaker 2: darks burning questions. But we also very frequently get in
Speaker 2: some secrets and we have some absolute doozies.
Speaker 1: It's almost like we.
Speaker 2: Receive these with the expectation that it absolves some of
Speaker 2: your sins.
Speaker 1: It does, to be clear, it does not absolve anything,
Speaker 1: but keep them coming.
Speaker 2: You have been absolved, Amen, say three hol fathers.
Speaker 1: It's a callter hell father, I don't even know. Look
Speaker 1: hail Mary's okay, you tell me if you are going
Speaker 1: to absolve this sin. I'm going to kick off with
Speaker 1: a pretty big one. I have been sleeping with a
Speaker 1: guy for three years now. He has a girlfriend. Oh
Speaker 1: and they have a house and a dog together. We
Speaker 1: have the same name as well. The excitement. No, that's
Speaker 1: too naughty. Do you know what?
Speaker 2: I like it when these things are really trivial stuff,
Speaker 2: not when they're like home wrecking terrible things.
Speaker 1: This makes me feel bad, like I need to call
Speaker 1: the boyfriend. Well, I'm sorry about it, feel like I'm shocked.
Speaker 1: I was looking, I was like, is there a phone number?
Speaker 1: I was like, well, no, I'm not about it. I'm
Speaker 1: not absolving anything from this. I think that you need
Speaker 1: to stop doing this immediately. Excitement aside, same name aside,
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. Having the same name as a person's partner
Speaker 1: you're having the affair with.
Speaker 2: Makes it makes it very easy to cheat though, because
Speaker 2: you just have to have.
Speaker 1: The one name in the phone.
Speaker 2: You could be texting whoever, or you could just send
Speaker 2: off the same text copy paste if it goes one
Speaker 2: hundred percent, not absolving it. Okay, all right, I've got
Speaker 2: another one. So that's a that's a big no. This
Speaker 2: one gave me a little bit of a giggle, but
Speaker 2: for the wrong reasons. My boyfriend believes we started dating
Speaker 2: in January. On January eighteen, twenty eighteen, and I thought
Speaker 2: that it was actually July twenty eighteen, so I was
Speaker 2: still casually dating other people for six months. Do you
Speaker 2: need to tell Like if you thought if your partner
Speaker 2: thought that you were in a committed relationship and you
Speaker 2: thought that you were single, and there's been ambiguity for
Speaker 2: six months, Like he's gonna think that he was cheating
Speaker 2: on for six months.
Speaker 1: It's six months is a big time for one of
Speaker 1: you to think you're in the relationship and the other not.
Speaker 1: Like you, guys, if anything, need to work on your communication,
Speaker 1: that's right, I think, Oh, I don't know.
Speaker 2: I almost think like, no, it's just take it to
Speaker 2: the grave that one. Don't tell anyone.
Speaker 1: Okay, what about this? This is a sin. But my
Speaker 1: friend and I hated this teacher that we had and
Speaker 1: before our year twelve graduation we backwashed into the religious
Speaker 1: wine and the teacher drunkns you, I mean hopefully was
Speaker 1: this before COVID. You can't go and spin to something.
Speaker 1: You can't spin to wine pre COVID. I mean, yeah, ever,
Speaker 1: but like during COVID. This is a big note. But
Speaker 1: that is it from us today. Guys. We've got to
Speaker 1: get going because Laura bern has to get to her
Speaker 1: Hens party. We're halfway through. We need to get you
Speaker 1: back to some strippers. We need to get you drinking again. Okay,
Speaker 1: is there strippers? I told you you won't tell me anything.
Speaker 1: You've got Jason Mamoea and Darren McMullen. What more do
Speaker 1: you want?
Speaker 7: Women?
Speaker 2: All right, I'm just expecting to get their ow Maddi.
Speaker 2: Jy's going to rock up and do a strip show.
Speaker 2: That's about all we have time for now. This week
Speaker 2: on the podcast, if you want to listen to some
Speaker 2: more life on cart we are interviewing Rob Mills and
Speaker 2: his amazing new book that he had and he's speaking
Speaker 2: about everything from mental health to his time going from
Speaker 2: being a reality TV icon to being a Broadway sensation.
Speaker 2: He truly is such a warm and wonderful person to
Speaker 2: speak with and just.
Speaker 1: To falling in love too. I really loved chatting to him.
Speaker 1: He was really incredible and he was funny. He was
Speaker 1: really really funny. But that is coming out on Tuesday.
Speaker 1: You can get that anywhere you get your podcasts. And
Speaker 1: speaking of he's not the only one on the book out.
Speaker 2: We have a book out too this week called We
Speaker 2: Love Love and you can get that from all good
Speaker 2: bookstores and also some terrible bookstores as well.
Speaker 1: We do not discriminate.
Speaker 2: It's available everywhere, and that is if from us.
Speaker 1: You know the drill. Don't forget to tell you mum,
Speaker 1: tell you dad, tell you dog, Tell your friends, and
Speaker 1: share the love, because we love love