1 00:00:00,240 --> 00:00:03,400 Speaker 1: Ash, I have a bone to pick with you. There 2 00:00:03,480 --> 00:00:08,720 Speaker 1: is something that you do that I choose your offense 3 00:00:08,800 --> 00:00:12,000 Speaker 1: by it if you're offended by it. Yeah, a little bit. 4 00:00:12,280 --> 00:00:14,680 Speaker 1: Every time we speak on the phone, you all get 5 00:00:14,720 --> 00:00:20,840 Speaker 1: an erection. You always say goodbye and then you just 6 00:00:20,880 --> 00:00:23,640 Speaker 1: sit there. Yeah, because I don't want to be rude 7 00:00:23,680 --> 00:00:25,760 Speaker 1: and hang up. But even if if you're at home 8 00:00:26,200 --> 00:00:30,240 Speaker 1: and I'm driving, that means the priority is for you 9 00:00:30,480 --> 00:00:31,120 Speaker 1: to hang up. 10 00:00:31,880 --> 00:00:33,560 Speaker 2: Yeah, but I don't want to be just in case 11 00:00:33,560 --> 00:00:34,680 Speaker 2: you've got something else to say. 12 00:00:35,200 --> 00:00:41,440 Speaker 1: We both said bye, there's a long pause and then 13 00:00:41,440 --> 00:00:42,280 Speaker 1: that's it. You hang up. 14 00:00:44,840 --> 00:00:48,159 Speaker 2: I do that because my grandmother does that too, but 15 00:00:48,200 --> 00:00:49,559 Speaker 2: she won't actually. 16 00:00:49,280 --> 00:00:50,280 Speaker 1: Care about your grandmother. 17 00:00:50,400 --> 00:00:53,120 Speaker 2: How dare you? You shut your beautiful mouth. 18 00:00:53,880 --> 00:01:13,959 Speaker 1: She says. Welcome back to two dads. Don't mean I'll 19 00:01:13,959 --> 00:01:16,440 Speaker 1: do my intro then you can, okay, Welcome back to 20 00:01:16,440 --> 00:01:18,320 Speaker 1: t dating Dads. I am Maddie Jay. 21 00:01:18,200 --> 00:01:19,400 Speaker 2: And I'm disappointed. 22 00:01:19,560 --> 00:01:21,800 Speaker 1: And this is a podcast all about parenting. It is 23 00:01:21,840 --> 00:01:24,399 Speaker 1: the good, it is the bad and the relatable. And 24 00:01:24,400 --> 00:01:28,440 Speaker 1: if you've come wedding any type of advice, stop right now, 25 00:01:28,760 --> 00:01:30,279 Speaker 1: thank you very much. 26 00:01:30,640 --> 00:01:33,640 Speaker 2: I need somebody with the humor. 27 00:01:34,319 --> 00:01:37,600 Speaker 1: We're not the podcast for you, as you probably tell 28 00:01:37,959 --> 00:01:38,920 Speaker 1: your grandma. 29 00:01:39,000 --> 00:01:39,640 Speaker 2: What does she do? 30 00:01:40,120 --> 00:01:41,240 Speaker 1: Pretend like I'm interested? 31 00:01:41,640 --> 00:01:46,000 Speaker 2: Lovely lady, lovely, lovely, lovely lady. She will not hang 32 00:01:46,080 --> 00:01:50,160 Speaker 2: up the phone. I'm saying, will not hang up the phone. 33 00:01:50,760 --> 00:01:54,280 Speaker 1: Is this the one that doesn't have she can't move, 34 00:01:54,360 --> 00:01:58,160 Speaker 1: she's she's bedridden. No, I only have one. I only 35 00:01:58,200 --> 00:01:59,440 Speaker 1: have one grandparent. 36 00:01:59,000 --> 00:02:01,880 Speaker 2: And she is not bedridden. She's far from it. But she, 37 00:02:02,960 --> 00:02:06,720 Speaker 2: for my whole life, has never hung up the phone 38 00:02:06,760 --> 00:02:09,760 Speaker 2: on me, or actually once and we were like, she 39 00:02:09,840 --> 00:02:10,440 Speaker 2: must be sick. 40 00:02:10,600 --> 00:02:13,120 Speaker 1: There must be like back in the day when phone's invented, 41 00:02:13,120 --> 00:02:15,160 Speaker 1: they must be like, don't off the phone, otherwise you'll 42 00:02:15,160 --> 00:02:15,840 Speaker 1: lose your soul. 43 00:02:17,320 --> 00:02:20,000 Speaker 2: She does this, she goes, okay bye, one two three, 44 00:02:20,080 --> 00:02:21,240 Speaker 2: you go bye? 45 00:02:23,320 --> 00:02:25,840 Speaker 1: One two three, all right, bye bye? 46 00:02:25,960 --> 00:02:29,520 Speaker 2: And why is she counting here, like counting for me 47 00:02:29,600 --> 00:02:30,200 Speaker 2: to hang up? 48 00:02:30,360 --> 00:02:33,200 Speaker 1: Yeah, But like even if she goes, oh. 49 00:02:33,120 --> 00:02:34,760 Speaker 2: Are you driving, I'll let you go, let you go, 50 00:02:34,880 --> 00:02:39,119 Speaker 2: let you go, okay bye bye, one two three bye, 51 00:02:39,720 --> 00:02:41,680 Speaker 2: to the point where I have to hang up on 52 00:02:41,720 --> 00:02:42,720 Speaker 2: her mid. 53 00:02:42,560 --> 00:02:44,680 Speaker 1: Center saying a lot from someone who never hangs out. 54 00:02:44,680 --> 00:02:47,560 Speaker 2: I know she'll be like, all right, but I don't 55 00:02:47,600 --> 00:02:48,240 Speaker 2: I hung up. 56 00:02:50,080 --> 00:02:52,040 Speaker 1: Anyway, so that's what I get it. At least give 57 00:02:52,040 --> 00:02:56,080 Speaker 1: her the one, two three. Ah. Yes, I think we 58 00:02:56,120 --> 00:03:00,200 Speaker 1: should probably have a cheeky little drop for sure, if 59 00:03:00,240 --> 00:03:02,480 Speaker 1: we may, just something that I've had sitting there in 60 00:03:02,480 --> 00:03:09,920 Speaker 1: the fridge. Spicy cheers, my friend. 61 00:03:10,200 --> 00:03:14,320 Speaker 2: Thank you, Matt. We are enjoying the NRB. However it's 62 00:03:14,360 --> 00:03:17,600 Speaker 2: pronounced sorry nrb. 63 00:03:18,919 --> 00:03:21,799 Speaker 1: Ash. We weren't drinking the NRB. On the weekend just gone, 64 00:03:21,840 --> 00:03:24,880 Speaker 1: we had another special drop from Stone and Wood, called 65 00:03:25,160 --> 00:03:29,919 Speaker 1: the Wood Fired Porter. This year's Stone beer boasts aromatic 66 00:03:30,000 --> 00:03:33,360 Speaker 1: notes of brood coffee, rich dark chocolate, hints of subtly 67 00:03:33,400 --> 00:03:34,600 Speaker 1: smoked barley. 68 00:03:34,600 --> 00:03:37,280 Speaker 2: With a paw that mirrors the depths of night itself. 69 00:03:37,360 --> 00:03:41,400 Speaker 2: Each sip is velvety smooth, balanced by its steady fast bitterness. 70 00:03:41,560 --> 00:03:43,360 Speaker 2: Enjoy this one with a mate by the fire, like 71 00:03:43,400 --> 00:03:45,000 Speaker 2: we were on Sunurday night. 72 00:03:48,040 --> 00:03:50,680 Speaker 1: The launch of this beer was at Festival of the 73 00:03:50,720 --> 00:03:53,640 Speaker 1: Stone Barron Bay on the weekend just gone, where they 74 00:03:53,680 --> 00:03:57,040 Speaker 1: tapped the first cake and shared it with some locals 75 00:03:57,640 --> 00:04:00,400 Speaker 1: the Blowings. The Blowings like the Blowings like me and 76 00:04:00,400 --> 00:04:04,120 Speaker 1: and the broader community and Ash. It was an event 77 00:04:04,160 --> 00:04:07,280 Speaker 1: that we were excited about for many many weeks, Ash. 78 00:04:07,320 --> 00:04:09,760 Speaker 1: I think the last festival that I went to was 79 00:04:09,840 --> 00:04:15,400 Speaker 1: about eight years ago. Same and it was sick. It 80 00:04:15,480 --> 00:04:18,080 Speaker 1: was awesome. We saw some great acts, some of whom 81 00:04:18,320 --> 00:04:20,279 Speaker 1: happened to be your family members. I did have some 82 00:04:20,400 --> 00:04:23,560 Speaker 1: family playing there, your mum and dad on a tambourine. 83 00:04:25,760 --> 00:04:28,400 Speaker 2: Not this year, maybe next year if they get the 84 00:04:28,480 --> 00:04:30,799 Speaker 2: call up. Yes, it was great, it was good fun. 85 00:04:31,200 --> 00:04:34,279 Speaker 2: They do it every year, Matt. I just so happened 86 00:04:34,320 --> 00:04:37,039 Speaker 2: to form the first day of winter, hence the tapping 87 00:04:37,080 --> 00:04:39,440 Speaker 2: of the egg. Two of my cousins happened to play 88 00:04:39,480 --> 00:04:42,760 Speaker 2: in the beefs who played that were amazing. Two of 89 00:04:42,800 --> 00:04:45,960 Speaker 2: them the drummer and the guitars, both my cousins. 90 00:04:46,080 --> 00:04:48,080 Speaker 1: Talented family and they. 91 00:04:47,960 --> 00:04:50,080 Speaker 2: Are also One of them is also dating ruby Field's 92 00:04:50,200 --> 00:04:52,520 Speaker 2: fun fact whirl Wind of a trip for me. 93 00:04:53,080 --> 00:04:57,640 Speaker 1: Laura was a static is probably the right word, she said, 94 00:04:57,800 --> 00:05:01,240 Speaker 1: your face I was. I was in Byron for my 95 00:05:01,320 --> 00:05:04,960 Speaker 1: brother's fortieth First of the Stone was that weekend. We 96 00:05:04,960 --> 00:05:07,200 Speaker 1: were staying at a hotel which also happened to be 97 00:05:07,240 --> 00:05:09,080 Speaker 1: the hotel that you were staying at. 98 00:05:09,279 --> 00:05:11,560 Speaker 2: Yes, so Stonewood had me up there for the event, 99 00:05:11,600 --> 00:05:12,800 Speaker 2: which is great and also. 100 00:05:12,560 --> 00:05:14,120 Speaker 1: Put me up in this same hotel. 101 00:05:14,279 --> 00:05:19,760 Speaker 2: Coincidentally, I didn't request that. Just so happened, be honest, 102 00:05:20,279 --> 00:05:23,240 Speaker 2: be honest. I put my foot down and I said 103 00:05:23,279 --> 00:05:27,360 Speaker 2: I must stay in the unit directly next to them. 104 00:05:27,440 --> 00:05:28,560 Speaker 2: That it wasn't like that. 105 00:05:28,880 --> 00:05:31,240 Speaker 1: I did forget. I thought it was hilarious. I forgot 106 00:05:31,240 --> 00:05:34,200 Speaker 1: to tell Laura. It was one of those things that 107 00:05:34,240 --> 00:05:35,880 Speaker 1: I was like, I'll tell her in a second, And 108 00:05:35,880 --> 00:05:38,560 Speaker 1: then before I knew it, there was a voice that 109 00:05:38,680 --> 00:05:41,080 Speaker 1: was bellowing out from the reception area as we pull 110 00:05:41,160 --> 00:05:45,000 Speaker 1: side and look who it is, long and behold it's Ashwicks. 111 00:05:45,120 --> 00:05:49,920 Speaker 2: And your mum was so happy. Shit, she was weirdly happy, 112 00:05:49,960 --> 00:05:52,279 Speaker 2: weirdly happy. I haven't seen her since the cruise where 113 00:05:52,279 --> 00:05:56,960 Speaker 2: we had a brilliant time and what happened between we 114 00:05:57,160 --> 00:05:57,920 Speaker 2: just viban. 115 00:05:58,160 --> 00:05:59,320 Speaker 1: We're always vibing. 116 00:06:00,080 --> 00:06:02,160 Speaker 2: That's like my key demographic to a woman. 117 00:06:02,600 --> 00:06:05,520 Speaker 1: Is there certain there's a line, all right when someone 118 00:06:05,600 --> 00:06:08,240 Speaker 1: is enjoying the company of a loved one and then 119 00:06:08,240 --> 00:06:11,320 Speaker 1: it starts to cross over. Am I the loved one? 120 00:06:12,480 --> 00:06:16,080 Speaker 1: I just feel like I wouldn't be surprised in two 121 00:06:16,160 --> 00:06:18,400 Speaker 1: months down the track if I start calling you dad, Yeah, 122 00:06:18,440 --> 00:06:19,960 Speaker 1: well you might as well, start, now, are you having 123 00:06:19,960 --> 00:06:22,159 Speaker 1: sex with my mom? No? Okay, I am not. 124 00:06:22,320 --> 00:06:22,719 Speaker 2: April. 125 00:06:25,520 --> 00:06:28,560 Speaker 1: Is that directed at my mom? No, definitely not, but 126 00:06:28,640 --> 00:06:31,279 Speaker 1: she was very happy to Laula and Marley also happened 127 00:06:31,240 --> 00:06:31,680 Speaker 1: to see you. 128 00:06:31,800 --> 00:06:35,919 Speaker 2: And your sister all the females in your life. Really yeah, 129 00:06:35,960 --> 00:06:37,680 Speaker 2: and Bill, do you know what happened though? 130 00:06:37,760 --> 00:06:41,000 Speaker 1: Actually we were having a beautiful moment for my brother 131 00:06:41,320 --> 00:06:43,520 Speaker 1: for his fortieth We went run in a circle. Sounds 132 00:06:43,520 --> 00:06:45,920 Speaker 1: like we're in a cult, you are, And we were 133 00:06:45,960 --> 00:06:48,880 Speaker 1: saying a nice memory for my brother, and we were 134 00:06:48,880 --> 00:06:54,400 Speaker 1: like three siblings in you stormed and I saw you 135 00:06:54,800 --> 00:06:57,679 Speaker 1: kind of like just waiting a subtle like just one second, 136 00:06:57,720 --> 00:07:00,279 Speaker 1: you know, when you're like having a deeper, meaningful conversation, 137 00:07:00,480 --> 00:07:02,480 Speaker 1: someone comes in and you're like, I thought it was. 138 00:07:02,400 --> 00:07:02,880 Speaker 2: A what's up? 139 00:07:02,920 --> 00:07:03,160 Speaker 1: Brother? 140 00:07:04,240 --> 00:07:06,920 Speaker 2: I just came bursting through the door with all this 141 00:07:07,200 --> 00:07:12,440 Speaker 2: renewed Johnson energy for you. The place went wild. That's 142 00:07:12,440 --> 00:07:13,240 Speaker 2: how I remember it. 143 00:07:15,520 --> 00:07:17,320 Speaker 1: But it was a great weekend, not only for my 144 00:07:17,400 --> 00:07:20,640 Speaker 1: brother who celebrated his fortieth birthday. Also, will just say 145 00:07:20,640 --> 00:07:25,840 Speaker 1: that Adam Johnson is single on my Instagram. I encourage 146 00:07:25,880 --> 00:07:28,200 Speaker 1: her any other single females out there to go check 147 00:07:28,240 --> 00:07:30,640 Speaker 1: him out, and also check out my two younger brothers 148 00:07:30,640 --> 00:07:34,440 Speaker 1: as well, who are also single. Them to try and 149 00:07:34,480 --> 00:07:37,560 Speaker 1: get linked up with one of my followers unsuccessfully for 150 00:07:37,600 --> 00:07:38,360 Speaker 1: a long time now. 151 00:07:38,680 --> 00:07:40,160 Speaker 2: Just solicting your brothers out. 152 00:07:40,280 --> 00:07:43,800 Speaker 1: So just if you are interested, three brothers to pick from, 153 00:07:44,240 --> 00:07:45,960 Speaker 1: as a twenty eight year old, thirty one year old, 154 00:07:46,040 --> 00:07:46,760 Speaker 1: or a forty year old. 155 00:07:46,640 --> 00:07:48,760 Speaker 2: Tea, You've really got so many options. 156 00:07:48,840 --> 00:07:50,560 Speaker 1: Take all three if you will. I have all got 157 00:07:50,560 --> 00:07:54,880 Speaker 1: different hobbies. But it was a good weekend because I 158 00:07:54,920 --> 00:07:58,520 Speaker 1: think the last couple of weeks, Laura has been extremely busy, 159 00:07:58,640 --> 00:08:01,400 Speaker 1: as she always is, and we're very much in the 160 00:08:01,480 --> 00:08:04,520 Speaker 1: routine of just we wake up, Laura's out the door 161 00:08:04,560 --> 00:08:08,640 Speaker 1: really early, straight into the grind of getting the kids ready, 162 00:08:08,640 --> 00:08:12,320 Speaker 1: getting them to daycare. You come home, you're tired from work, 163 00:08:12,560 --> 00:08:14,200 Speaker 1: straight into the bedtime routine. 164 00:08:14,600 --> 00:08:18,160 Speaker 2: Yeah, which and then by that time you're like, oh fuck, you. 165 00:08:18,200 --> 00:08:21,080 Speaker 1: Got to cook dinner, You got a clean dinner, the laundry, 166 00:08:21,680 --> 00:08:25,600 Speaker 1: back in bed, and you do it all again weekend weekends, 167 00:08:26,040 --> 00:08:28,560 Speaker 1: and then kind of realize that there've been a little 168 00:08:28,560 --> 00:08:31,920 Speaker 1: period of time ash where Laura and I just went 169 00:08:32,000 --> 00:08:34,040 Speaker 1: dedicating decent amount of time. 170 00:08:33,800 --> 00:08:35,560 Speaker 2: To each other you're talking about sex. 171 00:08:36,640 --> 00:08:40,040 Speaker 1: I was trying to be subtle, but also I will 172 00:08:40,080 --> 00:08:42,520 Speaker 1: caveat it and say that it may be sometimes like 173 00:08:42,559 --> 00:08:45,680 Speaker 1: two days before we've been and in my mind, I'm like, 174 00:08:45,720 --> 00:08:50,640 Speaker 1: it's been months. I'm starving over this long hard slug. 175 00:08:50,880 --> 00:08:56,800 Speaker 1: It's drout. They say I need something, some form of adventure, 176 00:08:58,280 --> 00:09:03,040 Speaker 1: and it just so happened that the timing was right. 177 00:09:03,679 --> 00:09:06,880 Speaker 2: Holidays is always a good one. Gets everyone. Juice is flying. 178 00:09:07,760 --> 00:09:09,200 Speaker 1: I was trying to keep this PG mate. 179 00:09:09,280 --> 00:09:10,360 Speaker 2: Juice is flowing. 180 00:09:11,720 --> 00:09:17,000 Speaker 1: Laura was squirting. Oh my god, I'm joking. I'm joking. 181 00:09:17,000 --> 00:09:22,520 Speaker 1: She's not a squirter. Yeah, I am. I'm sorry. Sorry 182 00:09:22,520 --> 00:09:24,360 Speaker 1: to all the parents out there who came for the 183 00:09:24,440 --> 00:09:27,240 Speaker 1: discussion about kids and have ended up in this like 184 00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:30,000 Speaker 1: cesspit of a conversation. So I don't want to toot 185 00:09:30,080 --> 00:09:35,360 Speaker 1: my own horn here ash, but I will reveal great news. 186 00:09:35,480 --> 00:09:43,679 Speaker 1: Is sorry, Sorry, sorry? Can I just say what? 187 00:09:43,679 --> 00:09:43,760 Speaker 2: What? 188 00:09:44,040 --> 00:09:47,360 Speaker 1: Parents out there who were married have time for anal sex? 189 00:09:47,720 --> 00:09:49,840 Speaker 1: Send in, write in, tell us, I mean, are you 190 00:09:49,880 --> 00:09:51,439 Speaker 1: are you having anal sex? No? 191 00:09:51,880 --> 00:09:54,120 Speaker 2: That's my point, that's where you poop from. That's it. 192 00:09:55,679 --> 00:09:56,400 Speaker 2: If you ask me. 193 00:09:57,280 --> 00:10:00,560 Speaker 1: No one has something. We've got five minute windows and 194 00:10:00,800 --> 00:10:02,880 Speaker 1: you know, if we're going down that roade, take one. 195 00:10:04,440 --> 00:10:07,600 Speaker 2: Excuse me, I don't know what I think. We've gone 196 00:10:07,600 --> 00:10:11,040 Speaker 2: off track here, let's get back, let's bring it. No, 197 00:10:11,679 --> 00:10:14,680 Speaker 2: you never had no, never, not once, not one. This 198 00:10:15,000 --> 00:10:18,760 Speaker 2: a man or a woman. You're telling you sorry, this 199 00:10:18,880 --> 00:10:21,720 Speaker 2: is not about my sexual history. I made a silly 200 00:10:21,840 --> 00:10:23,840 Speaker 2: joke and we've gone on a tangent. 201 00:10:24,320 --> 00:10:26,400 Speaker 1: So Laura and I had we had sex twice, two 202 00:10:26,480 --> 00:10:30,200 Speaker 1: times in two days. In two days. Look, it's shut up, 203 00:10:30,240 --> 00:10:32,600 Speaker 1: it's you know when you have done it, you've cracked 204 00:10:32,640 --> 00:10:35,400 Speaker 1: the code. How did you do it? I don't know 205 00:10:35,480 --> 00:10:36,120 Speaker 1: even Laura and I. 206 00:10:36,360 --> 00:10:38,400 Speaker 2: Did you use the same move twice to get it going? 207 00:10:38,559 --> 00:10:41,760 Speaker 1: Or you just oh yeah, missionary, that's all we got. 208 00:10:42,480 --> 00:10:46,640 Speaker 1: Belly to belly. Yeah, it wasn't intentional. I didn't go 209 00:10:46,640 --> 00:10:50,280 Speaker 1: into this holiday with the sex. Wasn't intentional. Not the 210 00:10:50,320 --> 00:10:54,520 Speaker 1: second wasn't. It wasn't the second time around, first time round. 211 00:10:54,559 --> 00:10:57,959 Speaker 1: We're both like, tonight's the night, like we're doing get 212 00:10:57,960 --> 00:10:59,680 Speaker 1: the kids to bed, like one more story. We're like, 213 00:11:00,440 --> 00:11:02,000 Speaker 1: you guys are going to bed because mom and dad 214 00:11:02,080 --> 00:11:05,480 Speaker 1: need our special time. So the night one tick that box. 215 00:11:06,120 --> 00:11:09,520 Speaker 1: We're good to go and I was satisfied. I was happy, 216 00:11:09,600 --> 00:11:12,079 Speaker 1: I was content. I was already like after that. The 217 00:11:12,160 --> 00:11:15,000 Speaker 1: next morning, I was skipping down to breakfast. I was 218 00:11:15,200 --> 00:11:17,600 Speaker 1: the birds are chirping, the sun was shining, the flowers 219 00:11:17,600 --> 00:11:20,080 Speaker 1: smell beautiful, and my family were. 220 00:11:19,960 --> 00:11:21,400 Speaker 2: Like, meanwhile, it's actually raining. 221 00:11:22,480 --> 00:11:26,959 Speaker 1: Everything is perfect. I was loving life. And then second night, 222 00:11:27,880 --> 00:11:30,400 Speaker 1: I just went to give a kiss good night. That 223 00:11:30,520 --> 00:11:32,720 Speaker 1: was it, and it went for a split second too long. 224 00:11:33,120 --> 00:11:35,520 Speaker 1: A tongue slipped in, and then Laura and I were like, 225 00:11:35,520 --> 00:11:36,280 Speaker 1: are we doing this? 226 00:11:36,440 --> 00:11:38,599 Speaker 2: So you okay, let me get as straight. You have 227 00:11:38,840 --> 00:11:43,960 Speaker 2: sex one night and sex the following night. Similar times. 228 00:11:44,280 --> 00:11:47,120 Speaker 2: I'd say say, so, what you could really really be 229 00:11:47,160 --> 00:11:49,480 Speaker 2: bragging about it here is that you had sex twice 230 00:11:49,840 --> 00:11:51,200 Speaker 2: in twenty four hours. 231 00:11:51,440 --> 00:11:54,560 Speaker 1: I mean, what a man, What a man, what a 232 00:11:54,640 --> 00:11:58,199 Speaker 1: many good man. Laura and I afterwards were like, I 233 00:11:58,200 --> 00:12:03,319 Speaker 1: don't think that's happened. I don't think we've had sex 234 00:12:03,400 --> 00:12:06,920 Speaker 1: that much since like The Bachelor finished. Wow, people will 235 00:12:06,920 --> 00:12:10,719 Speaker 1: now refer to me as a sex maniac. I may 236 00:12:10,760 --> 00:12:12,679 Speaker 1: have a sex addiction. And when I by the way, 237 00:12:12,720 --> 00:12:14,520 Speaker 1: how many times do you think you have to have 238 00:12:14,600 --> 00:12:18,480 Speaker 1: sex in a week before it's considered an addiction. I 239 00:12:18,480 --> 00:12:19,040 Speaker 1: think I'm there. 240 00:12:19,960 --> 00:12:24,480 Speaker 2: I am listening going Bro's. 241 00:12:24,600 --> 00:12:26,559 Speaker 1: It's like someone who's just sprinted a hundred meters being like, 242 00:12:26,559 --> 00:12:28,400 Speaker 1: I'm pretty much a marathon, right, I'm pretty. 243 00:12:28,120 --> 00:12:30,640 Speaker 2: Sure they've got to do it like every day, like 244 00:12:30,840 --> 00:12:34,280 Speaker 2: every like multiple times a day, not that I would know. 245 00:12:34,400 --> 00:12:35,280 Speaker 1: I'm almost there. 246 00:12:35,520 --> 00:12:36,320 Speaker 2: You're so close. 247 00:12:36,400 --> 00:12:41,400 Speaker 1: Yeah, one more day. So it was a great holiday. 248 00:12:41,520 --> 00:12:44,040 Speaker 2: I had a good time. Enough about your sexy time, Matthew. 249 00:12:44,120 --> 00:12:48,000 Speaker 2: There's something serious coming up, something serious on the calendar, 250 00:12:48,320 --> 00:12:52,160 Speaker 2: which is Oscar's birthday, and you made a very strong 251 00:12:52,280 --> 00:12:59,000 Speaker 2: promise you were going to organize a manly see Oh shit, mascot. 252 00:12:59,160 --> 00:13:01,360 Speaker 1: Yes, Oh it's going very well because it is. 253 00:13:01,280 --> 00:13:04,600 Speaker 2: A Manly Sea Eagles themed birthday party and it's oscars. 254 00:13:04,640 --> 00:13:06,280 Speaker 2: Those who are just catching up on this. It is 255 00:13:06,320 --> 00:13:09,160 Speaker 2: the first ever birthday party the Oscar's ever had. He's 256 00:13:09,280 --> 00:13:10,000 Speaker 2: very excited. 257 00:13:10,080 --> 00:13:13,679 Speaker 1: Does he realize the enormity of the situation, Oh yeah, 258 00:13:13,840 --> 00:13:14,440 Speaker 1: does he? Yeah? 259 00:13:14,480 --> 00:13:16,679 Speaker 2: He can see the pressure, you can feel it. 260 00:13:16,840 --> 00:13:18,760 Speaker 1: Yeah, He's like, there's so much tension in the household 261 00:13:18,800 --> 00:13:19,240 Speaker 1: right now. 262 00:13:19,720 --> 00:13:21,600 Speaker 2: I think I may have fucked up. 263 00:13:22,080 --> 00:13:25,400 Speaker 1: Oh god, the wait. The good thing is we have 264 00:13:25,440 --> 00:13:26,520 Speaker 1: time two weeks away. 265 00:13:26,800 --> 00:13:30,920 Speaker 2: Just keeping in mind as well that April doesn't know 266 00:13:31,040 --> 00:13:34,120 Speaker 2: that I fucked this up. So she's listening right now. 267 00:13:34,240 --> 00:13:36,040 Speaker 2: She's finding out for the she's finding out for the 268 00:13:36,120 --> 00:13:39,400 Speaker 2: first time, and I'm hiding. Okay, okay, so spit it out. 269 00:13:39,400 --> 00:13:40,120 Speaker 1: What do you got? Okay? 270 00:13:40,120 --> 00:13:45,760 Speaker 2: So Manly Sea Eagles themed, So April Special ordered some stickers, 271 00:13:45,800 --> 00:13:50,439 Speaker 2: little Manly Sea Eagle stickers to go onto the lollig bags. 272 00:13:50,520 --> 00:13:51,880 Speaker 1: What's the problem. This sounds great. 273 00:13:52,200 --> 00:13:54,280 Speaker 2: So she's ordered the stickers that take eight to ten 274 00:13:54,400 --> 00:13:57,640 Speaker 2: days to be delivered. I think I accidentally threw them out. 275 00:13:58,760 --> 00:13:59,600 Speaker 1: How did you do that? 276 00:13:59,760 --> 00:14:03,319 Speaker 2: And she keeps checking the tracking because they haven't updated 277 00:14:03,400 --> 00:14:03,920 Speaker 2: the tracking. 278 00:14:04,720 --> 00:14:06,480 Speaker 1: SUD say it's been delivered. 279 00:14:06,600 --> 00:14:09,920 Speaker 2: No, there was something obscure looking in the letterbox, and 280 00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:11,360 Speaker 2: I thought it was junk mail. 281 00:14:11,440 --> 00:14:11,880 Speaker 1: It's abom. 282 00:14:13,320 --> 00:14:15,280 Speaker 2: I thought it was junk mail because I didn't know 283 00:14:15,360 --> 00:14:17,240 Speaker 2: that she was waiting on the stickers. So I've just 284 00:14:17,280 --> 00:14:20,040 Speaker 2: got the whole pile of ship and thrown it in 285 00:14:20,040 --> 00:14:23,080 Speaker 2: the recycling. Two days later, it was like, hey, can 286 00:14:23,120 --> 00:14:25,600 Speaker 2: you run out and check the letterbox. I think the 287 00:14:25,680 --> 00:14:29,240 Speaker 2: stickers have been delivered because it's been ten business days. 288 00:14:29,640 --> 00:14:33,160 Speaker 2: They said ten business days, it'll be here, and I went. 289 00:14:35,240 --> 00:14:36,760 Speaker 1: So, what's your course of action? Now? 290 00:14:36,880 --> 00:14:40,160 Speaker 2: I went to the letterbox just so I didn't look guilty, 291 00:14:41,520 --> 00:14:42,760 Speaker 2: just to check. 292 00:14:42,680 --> 00:14:44,680 Speaker 1: Like a fake walk to the letter box. Yeah, yeah, 293 00:14:44,720 --> 00:14:46,880 Speaker 1: I just went for a walk to me. Let me 294 00:14:46,920 --> 00:14:50,840 Speaker 1: just check the garage I was. I was like, so 295 00:14:51,120 --> 00:14:53,120 Speaker 1: whatem like, you sure? Sure? 296 00:14:53,240 --> 00:14:55,920 Speaker 2: She's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, the tracking has an updated 297 00:14:55,920 --> 00:14:59,360 Speaker 2: but it's but it's yeah, And I was like okay, yeah, So. 298 00:14:59,360 --> 00:15:02,040 Speaker 1: I love how committed you are to just not revealing 299 00:15:02,040 --> 00:15:04,120 Speaker 1: that you've done something wrong where you just like it 300 00:15:04,160 --> 00:15:04,680 Speaker 1: was the day. 301 00:15:04,800 --> 00:15:06,640 Speaker 2: It was the day but she asked me to check 302 00:15:06,680 --> 00:15:09,400 Speaker 2: the day I was leaving to go to buy her 303 00:15:09,400 --> 00:15:11,400 Speaker 2: and to meet you. And I was like, yeah, I 304 00:15:11,480 --> 00:15:14,880 Speaker 2: quickly run out of check. So just Saturday, ran out, checked, 305 00:15:15,280 --> 00:15:15,720 Speaker 2: came back. 306 00:15:15,760 --> 00:15:19,440 Speaker 1: I was actually opened the letter box. Yeah, watching it 307 00:15:19,520 --> 00:15:22,440 Speaker 1: played the part it's not that bad. Yeah. 308 00:15:22,520 --> 00:15:24,560 Speaker 2: And then she was like, oh okay, I'm like, look, 309 00:15:24,600 --> 00:15:27,160 Speaker 2: we've probably come on down Tuesday. So I've been like 310 00:15:28,480 --> 00:15:31,000 Speaker 2: just trying to fix the problem. I haven't fixed it 311 00:15:31,080 --> 00:15:34,840 Speaker 2: yet and she doesn't know. So by the time she 312 00:15:35,080 --> 00:15:39,440 Speaker 2: hears this, I will hopefully have having a solution. 313 00:15:39,560 --> 00:15:42,600 Speaker 1: What is the solution here because you can't or you 314 00:15:42,600 --> 00:15:43,160 Speaker 1: could reorder. 315 00:15:43,200 --> 00:15:46,160 Speaker 2: You have time, No, I don't. It's business days. No 316 00:15:46,280 --> 00:15:47,960 Speaker 2: need to yel there's business days. 317 00:15:48,600 --> 00:15:52,120 Speaker 1: You're raising your voice, and I appreciate your stress right now, 318 00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:54,160 Speaker 1: but there's no need to direct it at me. That's okay, 319 00:15:54,880 --> 00:15:57,960 Speaker 1: that's okay. You've got yourself in this situation. I'm trying 320 00:15:57,960 --> 00:15:59,560 Speaker 1: to get out of it. You've only got yourself to blame. 321 00:15:59,600 --> 00:15:59,800 Speaker 2: I do. 322 00:16:00,080 --> 00:16:02,040 Speaker 1: Can I help you in any way? Can I offer 323 00:16:02,080 --> 00:16:04,680 Speaker 1: my assistance? No, you've got your job, which just don't 324 00:16:04,720 --> 00:16:07,520 Speaker 1: let me down. Okay, just an update on that, by 325 00:16:07,520 --> 00:16:10,920 Speaker 1: the way. Okay, I did message manly you did on 326 00:16:10,960 --> 00:16:16,600 Speaker 1: Instagram and they blocked you no reply. They are playing 327 00:16:16,600 --> 00:16:18,720 Speaker 1: hard to get. I'm going to try as hard as 328 00:16:18,720 --> 00:16:20,880 Speaker 1: I can, but I just don't want to promise it. Like, 329 00:16:21,040 --> 00:16:22,479 Speaker 1: just don't tell Oscar. 330 00:16:23,000 --> 00:16:26,040 Speaker 2: Already too late. It's fun, I've told you. 331 00:16:26,120 --> 00:16:28,360 Speaker 1: Okay. If I can't get the actual mascot, I'll just 332 00:16:28,400 --> 00:16:33,520 Speaker 1: get like an eagle, Okay, like maybe like a fake eagle. Yeah, 333 00:16:33,840 --> 00:16:36,760 Speaker 1: actually I'll get a bulled eagle, a real balld eagle. 334 00:16:36,520 --> 00:16:38,480 Speaker 2: That might be dangerous around a bunch of kids. 335 00:16:39,160 --> 00:16:40,760 Speaker 1: No, that's what they want. 336 00:16:41,440 --> 00:16:44,440 Speaker 2: I've told me that's what they want. So if you 337 00:16:44,440 --> 00:16:47,520 Speaker 2: you when you have an update, yeah, and I'll let 338 00:16:47,560 --> 00:16:49,480 Speaker 2: you know once i've fixed this problem. But April, if 339 00:16:49,480 --> 00:16:51,840 Speaker 2: you are listening, I'm sorry. I am too much of 340 00:16:51,880 --> 00:16:54,040 Speaker 2: a coward to admit this to you. 341 00:16:54,160 --> 00:16:56,240 Speaker 1: And April, if you're also listening, I will not bring 342 00:16:56,280 --> 00:16:59,560 Speaker 1: a live balld eagle to the party. I promise you that, 343 00:17:00,040 --> 00:17:02,160 Speaker 1: but there will be an eagle or some description. Yes, 344 00:17:02,320 --> 00:17:05,880 Speaker 1: let's hope, so there won't be any eagle stickers. Can 345 00:17:05,920 --> 00:17:08,800 Speaker 1: I just say, can I just say, just so you know, 346 00:17:09,840 --> 00:17:12,359 Speaker 1: just you know, I had a job come through for 347 00:17:12,520 --> 00:17:17,199 Speaker 1: that weekend for Oscar's party, and I turned it down. 348 00:17:16,720 --> 00:17:21,119 Speaker 2: Okay, money was no good. You're not getting paid to 349 00:17:21,119 --> 00:17:21,960 Speaker 2: come to this birthday party. 350 00:17:21,960 --> 00:17:24,320 Speaker 1: You know this is my appearance fee. I've sent your 351 00:17:24,400 --> 00:17:26,880 Speaker 1: voice in the post, this person in the post. 352 00:17:26,960 --> 00:17:28,200 Speaker 2: I'll just throw it. 353 00:17:29,920 --> 00:17:31,240 Speaker 1: This birthday means a lot to me. 354 00:17:31,600 --> 00:17:35,040 Speaker 2: Oh so what you're saying is you're going to somehow 355 00:17:35,080 --> 00:17:36,119 Speaker 2: make this about you. 356 00:17:37,240 --> 00:17:39,080 Speaker 1: That's what I'm here. All I want you to know 357 00:17:39,480 --> 00:17:42,080 Speaker 1: is that it means a lot to me, and it 358 00:17:42,119 --> 00:17:45,440 Speaker 1: means a lot to Oscar. And come Hella high Water, 359 00:17:45,680 --> 00:17:47,840 Speaker 1: I will be there in attendance with your whole family. 360 00:17:47,920 --> 00:17:48,480 Speaker 2: I love that. 361 00:17:48,800 --> 00:17:52,280 Speaker 1: Maybe I'll bring Ellie along my mum. Should we dress 362 00:17:52,320 --> 00:17:52,840 Speaker 1: as an eagle? 363 00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:57,480 Speaker 2: Please bring your mum. Actually, I'll be super exciting. 364 00:17:57,600 --> 00:18:00,359 Speaker 1: I'll bet you will. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, April would joking. 365 00:18:03,200 --> 00:18:04,280 Speaker 1: I love how I'm going to put that in there, 366 00:18:04,359 --> 00:18:07,200 Speaker 1: just in case, just in case, I'm not joking a 367 00:18:07,200 --> 00:18:08,560 Speaker 1: beautiful seventy three year old woman. 368 00:18:08,720 --> 00:18:12,159 Speaker 2: I definitely threw those stickers out and I'm sorry. Also, 369 00:18:12,359 --> 00:18:15,600 Speaker 2: just with the Facebook, Matt, the Facebook, the Facebook group, 370 00:18:16,119 --> 00:18:19,520 Speaker 2: I do appreciate all of the suggestions for the lollibags. 371 00:18:19,880 --> 00:18:21,760 Speaker 1: There's there's a lot of people in the now we've 372 00:18:21,840 --> 00:18:24,199 Speaker 1: we ballooned from like one hundred and fifty members to 373 00:18:24,280 --> 00:18:27,600 Speaker 1: now I think three fifty. You were nearly four hundred. 374 00:18:27,680 --> 00:18:29,639 Speaker 1: Oh shit, we've gone viral. 375 00:18:29,880 --> 00:18:30,879 Speaker 2: We've gone viral. 376 00:18:30,960 --> 00:18:34,680 Speaker 1: We had some great suggestions for the Yeah, Plato always 377 00:18:34,720 --> 00:18:37,439 Speaker 1: goes down. Well, April, I said, did you get the Plato? 378 00:18:37,640 --> 00:18:40,840 Speaker 2: And she said no, no, no. I went with slime. 379 00:18:41,880 --> 00:18:49,159 Speaker 1: No, no, fuck, I'm giving you double slime is a nightmare. Yeah, slime? 380 00:18:49,400 --> 00:18:51,320 Speaker 1: Is that what I wanted to know? Dude. 381 00:18:51,520 --> 00:18:54,760 Speaker 2: I'm just saying it's just to me I've got my 382 00:18:54,800 --> 00:18:56,119 Speaker 2: hands full with this sticker stuff. 383 00:18:56,240 --> 00:19:01,359 Speaker 1: No name one situation where slime with kid under the 384 00:19:01,400 --> 00:19:02,920 Speaker 1: age of ten has gone, well. 385 00:19:02,920 --> 00:19:04,520 Speaker 2: I don't have one. I don't have one. 386 00:19:04,560 --> 00:19:07,400 Speaker 1: There you go and I look, you're looking at likeut 387 00:19:07,440 --> 00:19:10,719 Speaker 1: of my jurisdiction. It's a countdown of at least maximum 388 00:19:10,760 --> 00:19:13,920 Speaker 1: five minutes before it gets in their eye, in their hair, 389 00:19:14,240 --> 00:19:18,520 Speaker 1: on the furniture, on a pet. It's hey, I'm sorry, 390 00:19:18,600 --> 00:19:20,480 Speaker 1: I apologize. Out of my jurisdiction. 391 00:19:20,560 --> 00:19:22,520 Speaker 2: I don't want to tell you hands full with the 392 00:19:22,520 --> 00:19:23,360 Speaker 2: sticker situation. 393 00:19:23,560 --> 00:19:24,640 Speaker 1: You guys are two adults. 394 00:19:24,880 --> 00:19:28,080 Speaker 2: Can't monitor every purchase, okay, just this party. 395 00:19:28,280 --> 00:19:30,959 Speaker 1: My only advice for the party bags other than the slime, 396 00:19:31,280 --> 00:19:33,280 Speaker 1: is just making sure there's no choking hazards. 397 00:19:33,280 --> 00:19:35,879 Speaker 2: Oh, gu's gonna be full of dragging hazards. That's just 398 00:19:35,880 --> 00:19:36,800 Speaker 2: what lolllybags are. 399 00:19:36,960 --> 00:19:42,760 Speaker 1: And open it up and there'll be no stickers, serrated knives, blades, slime, syringes, 400 00:19:43,000 --> 00:19:45,840 Speaker 1: and then I'll get you and you go about the 401 00:19:45,920 --> 00:19:49,320 Speaker 1: asking love. But we appreciate the suggestion we do in 402 00:19:49,359 --> 00:19:50,919 Speaker 1: the face came coming through, come through. 403 00:19:50,960 --> 00:19:51,440 Speaker 2: We got time. 404 00:19:51,520 --> 00:19:55,159 Speaker 1: Ash. I made a mistake, you a mistake, No, I 405 00:19:55,240 --> 00:19:59,080 Speaker 1: know it doesn't happen often. It doesn't happen often. The 406 00:19:59,119 --> 00:20:01,600 Speaker 1: way that the response ability between me and Laura is 407 00:20:01,600 --> 00:20:06,919 Speaker 1: split up with the kids is that I do everything kidding, 408 00:20:07,640 --> 00:20:11,080 Speaker 1: I'm kidding, I'm kidding. Laura is very good. Laura is 409 00:20:11,160 --> 00:20:14,640 Speaker 1: very good, she owns the money. I look after the kids. 410 00:20:15,240 --> 00:20:16,600 Speaker 2: Sounds good, But. 411 00:20:16,560 --> 00:20:20,200 Speaker 1: When it comes to anything daycare related, because I normally 412 00:20:20,200 --> 00:20:22,720 Speaker 1: do the drop offs and the pickups, I'm the one 413 00:20:22,720 --> 00:20:26,240 Speaker 1: that's aware of when there's you know, certain things happening, 414 00:20:26,280 --> 00:20:29,480 Speaker 1: for example, like a morning tea, like Halloween dress up. 415 00:20:29,480 --> 00:20:32,000 Speaker 1: We had pajama Day the other day. I'm the one 416 00:20:32,040 --> 00:20:34,879 Speaker 1: that has to be aware of those type of calendar events. 417 00:20:34,960 --> 00:20:38,240 Speaker 2: Yeah, I am familiar with the calendar events. 418 00:20:38,280 --> 00:20:42,200 Speaker 1: And I missed a very important date. So the date 419 00:20:42,240 --> 00:20:46,080 Speaker 1: that I missed ash was one that we were informed about. 420 00:20:46,400 --> 00:20:48,640 Speaker 1: I want to say, like at least two weeks in advance. 421 00:20:48,680 --> 00:20:51,119 Speaker 1: There's a massive notice board at the entrance to the 422 00:20:51,160 --> 00:20:55,399 Speaker 1: daycare that says like, don't forget next week. On Tuesday, 423 00:20:56,440 --> 00:21:01,679 Speaker 1: it's daycare photo day. Oh fuck, And and for us 424 00:21:01,840 --> 00:21:04,360 Speaker 1: it's a very important day. They have a great photographer 425 00:21:04,359 --> 00:21:07,560 Speaker 1: come in and it's a chance that we get for 426 00:21:07,600 --> 00:21:10,520 Speaker 1: the girls to have a photo together. That's a beautiful keepsake. 427 00:21:10,720 --> 00:21:13,080 Speaker 2: Yeah, we not like a shit photo on the weekend 428 00:21:13,119 --> 00:21:15,320 Speaker 2: where they're like trying to outdo each other. 429 00:21:15,560 --> 00:21:17,760 Speaker 1: I don't know how this particular photographer does it, but 430 00:21:17,840 --> 00:21:24,119 Speaker 1: she gets great shots. Last year's photos, chef's kisses, candid Yeah, yeah, 431 00:21:24,240 --> 00:21:25,200 Speaker 1: I hate, I hate. 432 00:21:25,320 --> 00:21:29,399 Speaker 2: I hate the daycare photos because they're so posed, Like 433 00:21:29,480 --> 00:21:31,919 Speaker 2: especially with Oscar, they put him in some pose like 434 00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:34,840 Speaker 2: his hands in his pocket but his thumb's out. 435 00:21:34,920 --> 00:21:35,919 Speaker 1: He looks like, what's wrong with that? 436 00:21:36,080 --> 00:21:38,520 Speaker 2: It looks like the dad from Full House little Daddy 437 00:21:38,560 --> 00:21:39,160 Speaker 2: Tanner action. 438 00:21:39,280 --> 00:21:43,240 Speaker 1: He looks great jeans. Yeah, what's what's wrong with the 439 00:21:43,280 --> 00:21:46,679 Speaker 1: hand in the pocket. It just looks just looks too posy. 440 00:21:46,720 --> 00:21:49,159 Speaker 1: I mean, if he's doing like the eyebrow rub, or 441 00:21:49,200 --> 00:21:51,399 Speaker 1: if he's doing like fixing up the button of his 442 00:21:51,480 --> 00:21:54,800 Speaker 1: sleeve on a French calf, yeah, did I get it? 443 00:21:56,160 --> 00:21:58,760 Speaker 1: And he's doing like legs crossed too much, too much. 444 00:21:58,880 --> 00:22:02,159 Speaker 1: But if he's doing a hand in the lean, like 445 00:22:02,280 --> 00:22:04,359 Speaker 1: it's going to be one of his head shots for 446 00:22:04,359 --> 00:22:07,000 Speaker 1: for those wondering ashes, pretending like he's leaning on a 447 00:22:07,040 --> 00:22:09,720 Speaker 1: wall looking over the shoulder with a raised eyebrow, which 448 00:22:09,760 --> 00:22:12,960 Speaker 1: I think is a beautiful part. Okay, but they look 449 00:22:13,000 --> 00:22:15,000 Speaker 1: it's a good mix summer candid summer. 450 00:22:16,600 --> 00:22:17,200 Speaker 2: But that's fine. 451 00:22:17,200 --> 00:22:18,920 Speaker 1: When I get the girls ready in the morning, Ash, 452 00:22:19,000 --> 00:22:21,639 Speaker 1: I normally just take the path of least resistance, which 453 00:22:21,680 --> 00:22:24,919 Speaker 1: means I let the girls pick what they want to wear. Yeah, 454 00:22:24,960 --> 00:22:29,119 Speaker 1: like what whether it's mismatched socks, okay, whether it's a 455 00:22:29,160 --> 00:22:31,200 Speaker 1: T shirt that was when there were two and it's 456 00:22:31,240 --> 00:22:33,520 Speaker 1: like and they're like, that's what I want to wear. 457 00:22:33,560 --> 00:22:35,240 Speaker 1: I'm like, that's what that's what you want. That's what 458 00:22:35,280 --> 00:22:37,159 Speaker 1: you get. I don't care when as we can get 459 00:22:37,160 --> 00:22:42,159 Speaker 1: out the house climate appropriate. Well, even if it's not, 460 00:22:42,359 --> 00:22:44,480 Speaker 1: I'm like, they'll find out the hard way. I'll put it. Jo, 461 00:22:44,640 --> 00:22:47,720 Speaker 1: you're in the bag. Yeah yeah, But I think that 462 00:22:47,840 --> 00:22:52,359 Speaker 1: morning Lola was wearing an old Christmas T shirt. Was 463 00:22:52,359 --> 00:22:56,080 Speaker 1: it was it like a came up. There was a 464 00:22:56,119 --> 00:22:58,919 Speaker 1: Mickey Mouse one, but it was too small, been in 465 00:22:58,920 --> 00:23:02,000 Speaker 1: the dryways many times, so her little belly was sticking out. 466 00:23:02,560 --> 00:23:06,800 Speaker 1: Marley was wearing like those Cama leggings. They lose their 467 00:23:06,840 --> 00:23:08,800 Speaker 1: elasticity so they kind of fall down her ass and 468 00:23:08,800 --> 00:23:11,400 Speaker 1: they're also like halfway uper calf they're so short now 469 00:23:11,400 --> 00:23:15,760 Speaker 1: as well, And I was like, whatever, it's fine, they're 470 00:23:15,800 --> 00:23:18,800 Speaker 1: wearing something. But also they hate me doing their hair. 471 00:23:19,480 --> 00:23:23,359 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, So I'm like, sweet, if you want to 472 00:23:23,359 --> 00:23:24,960 Speaker 1: go out looking like that, it's on you. 473 00:23:25,040 --> 00:23:26,480 Speaker 2: Yeah, it doesn't bother you, doesn't bother me. 474 00:23:26,600 --> 00:23:28,320 Speaker 1: So I got the daycare. I was like, I'm at 475 00:23:28,320 --> 00:23:30,119 Speaker 1: the finish line. I can drop them off. I can 476 00:23:30,160 --> 00:23:32,520 Speaker 1: get a moment of freedom. And I looked at the 477 00:23:32,520 --> 00:23:35,000 Speaker 1: fucking sign at the entrance to daycare and I was like, 478 00:23:35,040 --> 00:23:38,840 Speaker 1: today's the day we're having photos. 479 00:23:39,000 --> 00:23:42,440 Speaker 2: Fcking what'd you do? What are your options? 480 00:23:42,440 --> 00:23:45,560 Speaker 1: Though I knew that Laura would kill me if I 481 00:23:45,600 --> 00:23:47,160 Speaker 1: didn't do something about the situation. 482 00:23:47,520 --> 00:23:49,240 Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I'd be like too bad. 483 00:23:50,080 --> 00:23:54,680 Speaker 1: I turned around and I got a new outfit. You 484 00:23:55,000 --> 00:23:55,760 Speaker 1: did you leave? 485 00:23:56,320 --> 00:23:58,840 Speaker 2: How did that work? You drove all the way home. 486 00:23:59,160 --> 00:24:02,439 Speaker 1: I kicked the girls out of the car, dropped them 487 00:24:02,440 --> 00:24:05,439 Speaker 1: off for daycare, went back to get the routfits, and 488 00:24:05,520 --> 00:24:08,040 Speaker 1: I got them their beautiful party dresses that they're only 489 00:24:08,080 --> 00:24:09,879 Speaker 1: allowed to wear at birthday parties. They can't wear a 490 00:24:09,960 --> 00:24:12,200 Speaker 1: daycare because they get them way too messy with paint. 491 00:24:13,119 --> 00:24:14,719 Speaker 1: And so that was a treat in itself. I got 492 00:24:14,760 --> 00:24:16,479 Speaker 1: them the sparkly jackets that they always want to wear, 493 00:24:16,480 --> 00:24:17,800 Speaker 1: but I don't allow them to wear because they get 494 00:24:17,840 --> 00:24:20,520 Speaker 1: it too dirty. That's one with a sequence, the secret. Yes, 495 00:24:20,840 --> 00:24:22,520 Speaker 1: you know it. You know it. You're a big fan. 496 00:24:23,080 --> 00:24:25,440 Speaker 1: And we've got some beautiful photos. 497 00:24:25,560 --> 00:24:28,960 Speaker 2: Oh that's great, I'm happy. What about the hair? Ah, 498 00:24:29,160 --> 00:24:29,920 Speaker 2: who did the hair? 499 00:24:30,000 --> 00:24:31,719 Speaker 1: They do the hair there? How do they know how 500 00:24:31,760 --> 00:24:33,480 Speaker 1: to do the hair so well? Because there's a girl 501 00:24:33,560 --> 00:24:37,680 Speaker 1: called Savannah who was just like the queen of doing 502 00:24:37,680 --> 00:24:41,040 Speaker 1: the hair. Ah, I suck. I don't know what she does. 503 00:24:41,680 --> 00:24:43,720 Speaker 1: But they come they come back home with like beautiful 504 00:24:43,720 --> 00:24:46,440 Speaker 1: French braids and Savannah's like, that's fifty dollars? 505 00:24:46,480 --> 00:24:48,240 Speaker 2: How did you get them to sit there that long? 506 00:24:48,359 --> 00:24:49,320 Speaker 2: Like to do that? 507 00:24:49,400 --> 00:24:51,680 Speaker 1: Don't ask me, bro as Savannah. 508 00:24:51,359 --> 00:24:53,920 Speaker 2: We need to get her in for a lesson. That'd 509 00:24:53,960 --> 00:24:55,520 Speaker 2: be'd be something I'll be willing to do. 510 00:24:55,680 --> 00:24:57,600 Speaker 1: But the photos were great, photos were great. 511 00:24:57,600 --> 00:25:00,920 Speaker 2: I'm glad. I'm so happy speaking of cool pickups man 512 00:25:00,960 --> 00:25:03,960 Speaker 2: and drop offs, because you know that in my house 513 00:25:04,359 --> 00:25:06,719 Speaker 2: there's an array of people to do, an array of jobs. 514 00:25:07,440 --> 00:25:11,520 Speaker 2: One is the pickup behind you. It takes a village, 515 00:25:11,640 --> 00:25:18,159 Speaker 2: It definitely does. I'm the village idiot. Sorry, let me 516 00:25:18,240 --> 00:25:21,240 Speaker 2: redo that. 517 00:25:23,200 --> 00:25:24,080 Speaker 1: How did I get there? 518 00:25:24,560 --> 00:25:25,440 Speaker 2: How did I get there? 519 00:25:25,520 --> 00:25:29,520 Speaker 1: Well? We did? Do you want to try it again? 520 00:25:30,119 --> 00:25:30,719 Speaker 1: You can do it. 521 00:25:31,119 --> 00:25:34,920 Speaker 2: I can't believe I fumbled up the idiot. They say 522 00:25:34,920 --> 00:25:38,000 Speaker 2: it takes They say it takes a village Matt, and 523 00:25:38,040 --> 00:25:42,000 Speaker 2: I just happened to be the village idiot and insert laugh. Okay, 524 00:25:42,119 --> 00:25:50,120 Speaker 2: so how dare you so we do? I didn't even 525 00:25:50,119 --> 00:25:52,919 Speaker 2: rehearse that. It just came to me. Then do we 526 00:25:53,000 --> 00:25:55,840 Speaker 2: just juggle? Who does the pickups? Really? The drop offs 527 00:25:55,920 --> 00:25:58,240 Speaker 2: is just April and I unless we both have a 528 00:25:58,320 --> 00:26:00,600 Speaker 2: work commitment. And then Popper comes in day of the day. 529 00:26:00,680 --> 00:26:02,960 Speaker 2: Who's papa is April's dad? 530 00:26:03,080 --> 00:26:04,840 Speaker 1: Frank? Poppa shout out to Frank. 531 00:26:04,920 --> 00:26:07,080 Speaker 2: He won't be listening because I doubt that he wants 532 00:26:07,080 --> 00:26:09,320 Speaker 2: to hear his son in law. Yap on, I'm the 533 00:26:09,400 --> 00:26:10,800 Speaker 2: APPA of the family, believe. 534 00:26:10,520 --> 00:26:10,840 Speaker 1: It or not. 535 00:26:12,040 --> 00:26:15,520 Speaker 2: And so we do it. We take turns in specific days. 536 00:26:15,800 --> 00:26:18,560 Speaker 2: My wife's a very scheduled person. She hates it when 537 00:26:18,600 --> 00:26:20,880 Speaker 2: things go out the window. So I do the pick 538 00:26:20,960 --> 00:26:23,560 Speaker 2: up on Monday because April is home with Macy. It's 539 00:26:23,560 --> 00:26:26,080 Speaker 2: a Macy April day, and I pick up Oscar from 540 00:26:26,119 --> 00:26:29,240 Speaker 2: pre school around three thirty four o'clock, depending how busy 541 00:26:29,280 --> 00:26:31,200 Speaker 2: I am today, he's gonna have to wait. 542 00:26:32,040 --> 00:26:35,760 Speaker 1: I'll be honest. Yeah, I really appreciate you giving your 543 00:26:35,840 --> 00:26:41,280 Speaker 1: entire weekly schedule. I'll make it any fast. 544 00:26:41,359 --> 00:26:46,040 Speaker 2: But Tuesday and Wednesday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Papa pick picks them 545 00:26:46,080 --> 00:26:48,399 Speaker 2: up and keeps them to five o'clock, Thank heavens, which 546 00:26:48,440 --> 00:26:51,120 Speaker 2: is amazing. Love that because both April and I work 547 00:26:51,160 --> 00:26:52,000 Speaker 2: Tuesday Wednesday. 548 00:26:55,160 --> 00:26:59,640 Speaker 1: But then I pick him up again on Thursday. I'm sorry, 549 00:27:00,160 --> 00:27:04,000 Speaker 1: it's part of the story, but every time I can 550 00:27:04,040 --> 00:27:05,119 Speaker 1: you let me get through it. 551 00:27:05,880 --> 00:27:08,520 Speaker 2: Every time I pick an Oscar up on a Thursday, 552 00:27:12,359 --> 00:27:16,879 Speaker 2: I can't work under these conditions. Continue continue what day 553 00:27:16,880 --> 00:27:23,199 Speaker 2: about Thursday, Thursday, We're at Thursday and then Friday night, Thursday, 554 00:27:23,480 --> 00:27:26,320 Speaker 2: I pick Oscar up and he's very disappointed all the time, 555 00:27:26,480 --> 00:27:29,480 Speaker 2: and he's sad disappointed, and I'm picking him up and 556 00:27:29,520 --> 00:27:32,879 Speaker 2: not Popper because he obviously loves Popper so much, or 557 00:27:32,920 --> 00:27:33,960 Speaker 2: as I thought. 558 00:27:33,960 --> 00:27:35,760 Speaker 1: Pop has been doing something that you've told him not 559 00:27:35,840 --> 00:27:36,600 Speaker 1: to do it, I'm not to do it. 560 00:27:36,600 --> 00:27:38,399 Speaker 2: And it's such a grandparent thing. And you'll pick up 561 00:27:38,400 --> 00:27:40,359 Speaker 2: on this and the parents at home who are listening 562 00:27:40,359 --> 00:27:42,760 Speaker 2: will also pick up on this that grandparents do this. 563 00:27:43,560 --> 00:27:45,680 Speaker 1: He gives him a special treat. 564 00:27:45,440 --> 00:27:49,680 Speaker 2: Every time he picks him up, and I. 565 00:27:49,640 --> 00:27:50,600 Speaker 1: Can't compete with that. 566 00:27:51,119 --> 00:27:55,000 Speaker 2: Okay, I've tried to compete with it, like by saying, oh, 567 00:27:55,080 --> 00:27:57,040 Speaker 2: I've got something in the car, but it's never good enough. 568 00:27:57,040 --> 00:27:59,359 Speaker 2: I don't know what he's given him. He's been told 569 00:27:59,400 --> 00:28:01,920 Speaker 2: not to do it, but he's sneakily doing it. 570 00:28:01,960 --> 00:28:04,240 Speaker 1: Did you tell him or did April? April? 571 00:28:04,320 --> 00:28:04,560 Speaker 2: Not me? 572 00:28:05,000 --> 00:28:07,440 Speaker 1: I was like, wow, So I imagine you like sitting 573 00:28:07,480 --> 00:28:09,320 Speaker 1: down Pop and being like, mate, me to talk. 574 00:28:09,560 --> 00:28:11,359 Speaker 2: Yeah, listen to you, mate, I'm going to rain you in. 575 00:28:11,920 --> 00:28:15,240 Speaker 2: It's not me that's doing it. But April's told him 576 00:28:15,240 --> 00:28:18,320 Speaker 2: once and April's like, look, did he hate it? He 577 00:28:18,440 --> 00:28:21,200 Speaker 2: must have, because he now he does it behind our backs. 578 00:28:24,040 --> 00:28:26,720 Speaker 2: And it's like April's like, I'm not going to say 579 00:28:26,760 --> 00:28:29,679 Speaker 2: anything else because he's honestly doing as a massive favor. 580 00:28:30,240 --> 00:28:33,760 Speaker 1: So now that is the tricky thing, isn't it, Because 581 00:28:33,800 --> 00:28:36,960 Speaker 1: on the one hand, you very much appreciate what he's doing, 582 00:28:37,320 --> 00:28:38,480 Speaker 1: but at the same time. 583 00:28:38,920 --> 00:28:41,600 Speaker 2: You're like, now he expects a special treat every time 584 00:28:42,120 --> 00:28:43,600 Speaker 2: I'm setting the kid up to fail. 585 00:28:44,000 --> 00:28:46,440 Speaker 1: No resilience in that child, no, and what do I 586 00:28:46,520 --> 00:28:46,800 Speaker 1: do do? 587 00:28:46,920 --> 00:28:50,600 Speaker 2: I just join the duck side and say to Popa, hey, 588 00:28:50,680 --> 00:28:52,880 Speaker 2: what do you give him? So I know to take 589 00:28:52,960 --> 00:28:55,680 Speaker 2: that with me to when I pick you up. I've 590 00:28:55,720 --> 00:28:57,800 Speaker 2: tried all sorts of things. I've been like, what about this, 591 00:28:57,920 --> 00:28:58,600 Speaker 2: You come get the. 592 00:28:58,520 --> 00:29:00,920 Speaker 1: Car and we'll go to the park, because it's to 593 00:29:00,960 --> 00:29:06,000 Speaker 1: propa oscar. We'll take you for a walk or a shuffle. 594 00:29:07,160 --> 00:29:10,360 Speaker 2: And I've been like, well, what about I've got Sometimes 595 00:29:10,400 --> 00:29:12,800 Speaker 2: I take Macy with me to like soften the blow. 596 00:29:14,120 --> 00:29:17,080 Speaker 1: Macy's like, what the It's not even my day to 597 00:29:17,120 --> 00:29:17,560 Speaker 1: be here? 598 00:29:18,440 --> 00:29:22,120 Speaker 2: And then it's just nothing's working, so I just have 599 00:29:22,200 --> 00:29:24,160 Speaker 2: to I think I'm just going to have to take 600 00:29:24,800 --> 00:29:26,840 Speaker 2: the disappointment. And I even tried to explain to him 601 00:29:26,840 --> 00:29:29,239 Speaker 2: that it's not a special treat if you get it 602 00:29:29,280 --> 00:29:31,520 Speaker 2: every day, so that's why it's special. When Poper picture 603 00:29:31,600 --> 00:29:33,440 Speaker 2: up and he stills just like yeah, but I want one, 604 00:29:33,920 --> 00:29:34,720 Speaker 2: but I want. 605 00:29:34,560 --> 00:29:37,800 Speaker 1: It, it sounds like he needs someone else external to 606 00:29:37,880 --> 00:29:40,360 Speaker 1: the family to have a word with Poppa. 607 00:29:41,440 --> 00:29:42,719 Speaker 2: I thought you kidnap him. 608 00:29:42,920 --> 00:29:45,000 Speaker 1: Okay, if you want to give me his address, I 609 00:29:45,040 --> 00:29:46,200 Speaker 1: will all phone number. 610 00:29:46,520 --> 00:29:48,560 Speaker 2: I will you can have it. I can have a 611 00:29:48,640 --> 00:29:50,800 Speaker 2: quick aspect to stern call from Maddie J. 612 00:29:51,080 --> 00:29:53,720 Speaker 1: I understand how frustrating it is because Laura had a 613 00:29:53,760 --> 00:29:56,120 Speaker 1: period where she was away for work quite a lot. 614 00:29:56,640 --> 00:29:59,360 Speaker 1: It's when she was doing the live shows. Oh yeah, 615 00:29:59,440 --> 00:30:02,280 Speaker 1: and every time should come back. There's one of the 616 00:30:02,280 --> 00:30:05,000 Speaker 1: news agencies at the airport that sell these little soft 617 00:30:05,000 --> 00:30:08,360 Speaker 1: toys and the kids absolutely love it. They go mad 618 00:30:08,400 --> 00:30:11,000 Speaker 1: for it, and she'd come home and she'd give them 619 00:30:11,040 --> 00:30:12,800 Speaker 1: the toy, and the kids kind of got into the 620 00:30:12,880 --> 00:30:15,280 Speaker 1: routine of they expect it. When when you come home, 621 00:30:15,320 --> 00:30:20,600 Speaker 1: they're like, where is it? Yeah? Literally, yeah right, literally, 622 00:30:20,640 --> 00:30:23,360 Speaker 1: like zero affection. And then when you say, oh, there's 623 00:30:23,360 --> 00:30:25,280 Speaker 1: no there is there is no toy, there's nothing here, 624 00:30:25,600 --> 00:30:31,719 Speaker 1: they just flip out, like you're dead to me now. 625 00:30:31,800 --> 00:30:36,280 Speaker 2: The other day we posted a video of Macy and 626 00:30:36,480 --> 00:30:40,200 Speaker 2: her attempt at pronouncing the word truck. 627 00:30:40,480 --> 00:30:41,920 Speaker 1: Do you mind if we put that in here right 628 00:30:41,960 --> 00:30:45,040 Speaker 1: now so people squiznip it? Yeah? Yeah, here's what she said. 629 00:30:44,880 --> 00:30:48,800 Speaker 2: Macy, can you say truck just one more time? 630 00:30:48,840 --> 00:30:56,400 Speaker 1: For me? Did you? Did you say? God? She's adorable. 631 00:30:56,480 --> 00:30:58,120 Speaker 2: I know the best part of that video is that 632 00:30:58,160 --> 00:31:00,360 Speaker 2: I said, you know, you said fuck and she was like, yeah, yeah. 633 00:31:00,840 --> 00:31:01,680 Speaker 1: I know what I'm doing. 634 00:31:02,040 --> 00:31:07,800 Speaker 2: You should hear us say oh no, oh no. So 635 00:31:07,920 --> 00:31:09,960 Speaker 2: we did put a call out, Matt, well you did 636 00:31:10,720 --> 00:31:12,560 Speaker 2: on the back of that because you thought to be hilarious, 637 00:31:12,560 --> 00:31:14,000 Speaker 2: which I also concurred. 638 00:31:14,280 --> 00:31:17,400 Speaker 1: There are many words that kids say unintentionally turning them 639 00:31:17,400 --> 00:31:20,800 Speaker 1: into swear words. And let's be honest, as much as 640 00:31:20,800 --> 00:31:23,480 Speaker 1: we don't want kids to swear, there is nothing funnier 641 00:31:23,960 --> 00:31:27,440 Speaker 1: than a toddler dropping the FBI as well as many 642 00:31:27,440 --> 00:31:30,760 Speaker 1: other profanities. So here are a few words that kids 643 00:31:30,880 --> 00:31:37,920 Speaker 1: accidentally turn into swear words. Crocodile turns into fuckodile, Garbage 644 00:31:37,960 --> 00:31:43,760 Speaker 1: truck turns into fuckage, fuckage, thank you turns into fuck you. 645 00:31:47,880 --> 00:31:49,160 Speaker 1: We say they don't know. 646 00:31:49,160 --> 00:31:52,680 Speaker 2: But they definitely know. I've got a couple here really quick. 647 00:31:52,800 --> 00:31:55,160 Speaker 2: So this one says my son says dinosaur, but it 648 00:31:55,200 --> 00:31:56,400 Speaker 2: always sounds like asshole. 649 00:31:58,760 --> 00:32:02,400 Speaker 1: I don't know how everything into like like it just 650 00:32:02,400 --> 00:32:05,160 Speaker 1: turns into fucking. Okay, what do you think this one is? 651 00:32:05,840 --> 00:32:06,360 Speaker 1: Fuck a fly? 652 00:32:06,680 --> 00:32:12,200 Speaker 2: That's a butterfly? Yeah, I go on here fucking. 653 00:32:14,280 --> 00:32:23,120 Speaker 1: But oh what a you got? Spring rolls struggling with 654 00:32:23,160 --> 00:32:26,640 Speaker 1: that one turns into fucking rolls. I don't know these 655 00:32:26,720 --> 00:32:28,280 Speaker 1: kids what they just love saying. 656 00:32:28,400 --> 00:32:30,520 Speaker 2: They just love the fuck word. He go, okay, how 657 00:32:30,560 --> 00:32:31,560 Speaker 2: do you think this kid says? 658 00:32:31,560 --> 00:32:42,600 Speaker 1: Popcorn? Corn cockcorn kids asking for chocolate? They call it 659 00:32:43,640 --> 00:32:49,120 Speaker 1: shit cock. It doesn't even sound like it. 660 00:32:49,760 --> 00:32:51,480 Speaker 2: Beach bitch, that's pretty. 661 00:32:52,040 --> 00:32:55,480 Speaker 1: That's going to be bitch. They his parents written in 662 00:32:55,520 --> 00:32:57,920 Speaker 1: and said that their child would yell out, look at 663 00:32:57,920 --> 00:33:02,719 Speaker 1: my dick. Oh that's a nice dick. What are they 664 00:33:02,760 --> 00:33:06,280 Speaker 1: referring to you? Oh you got a dick too. My 665 00:33:06,400 --> 00:33:11,800 Speaker 1: dick's too long. I feel you talking about a stick. 666 00:33:13,160 --> 00:33:18,320 Speaker 2: Talking about a stick, I'd say the darndest things don't brilliant. 667 00:33:18,600 --> 00:33:21,200 Speaker 2: That's brilliant. Brilliant, very very good. 668 00:33:21,240 --> 00:33:24,040 Speaker 1: And as a parent, that's a little like humorous boost 669 00:33:24,160 --> 00:33:26,120 Speaker 1: that you need to get through the day slash week. 670 00:33:26,600 --> 00:33:30,400 Speaker 2: Absolutely, I love that. All right, Well, let's move on 671 00:33:30,440 --> 00:33:32,160 Speaker 2: to our favorite segment. 672 00:33:32,160 --> 00:33:33,040 Speaker 1: Man, Petty couples. 673 00:33:33,080 --> 00:33:40,120 Speaker 2: Petty couples, petty couple, Welcome down the street, petty couple. 674 00:33:40,920 --> 00:33:48,240 Speaker 1: They like with me couple. I love you, but immit. 675 00:33:48,000 --> 00:33:55,920 Speaker 2: You, no one can push me quite like you. So 676 00:33:56,000 --> 00:33:58,040 Speaker 2: this is the segment where you write in the petty 677 00:33:58,080 --> 00:34:02,400 Speaker 2: little thing that you do to your significant other because 678 00:34:02,400 --> 00:34:04,400 Speaker 2: we love that shit. I got a couple of quick 679 00:34:04,440 --> 00:34:06,040 Speaker 2: ones I want to rattle off, Matt, you. 680 00:34:06,000 --> 00:34:07,120 Speaker 1: Know I like it quick ash. 681 00:34:07,200 --> 00:34:10,279 Speaker 2: I know Laura told me, all right, this one's from Joan. 682 00:34:11,040 --> 00:34:11,480 Speaker 1: Fuck you. 683 00:34:12,880 --> 00:34:16,160 Speaker 2: Joan leaves the plastic on the cheese sandwich because he 684 00:34:16,360 --> 00:34:17,960 Speaker 2: should be making his own lunch. 685 00:34:18,000 --> 00:34:23,200 Speaker 1: Just absolutely, I agree. Do you know? It's an important 686 00:34:23,280 --> 00:34:25,840 Speaker 1: lesson that I learned as a youngster that if you 687 00:34:25,880 --> 00:34:28,640 Speaker 1: do a job badly, you don't get asked to do 688 00:34:28,680 --> 00:34:29,080 Speaker 1: it again. 689 00:34:29,760 --> 00:34:30,560 Speaker 2: Yeah, at least. 690 00:34:30,680 --> 00:34:32,080 Speaker 1: Look, I like the ones. 691 00:34:32,600 --> 00:34:36,040 Speaker 2: This one had context to why she does that go on, 692 00:34:36,320 --> 00:34:38,560 Speaker 2: But the next one there's no context, and I don't 693 00:34:38,600 --> 00:34:42,480 Speaker 2: know why. Obviously they've just got this secret. Maybe they 694 00:34:42,480 --> 00:34:44,080 Speaker 2: resent them and they just need to do this. But 695 00:34:44,239 --> 00:34:47,280 Speaker 2: Hallie says, I folded all his socks with odd ones. 696 00:34:47,960 --> 00:34:55,120 Speaker 2: Good good, it's so like its small, petty coind harmlet. 697 00:34:55,280 --> 00:34:57,120 Speaker 1: But what led you to that point? 698 00:34:57,280 --> 00:34:58,480 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's what I want to know. 699 00:34:59,560 --> 00:35:03,399 Speaker 1: There's no I think I dislike more Ash in this. Well, 700 00:35:03,440 --> 00:35:05,279 Speaker 1: actually a few things, but let's not go let's not 701 00:35:05,320 --> 00:35:09,840 Speaker 1: go into it. Why I dislike wearing odd socks. It 702 00:35:10,040 --> 00:35:13,040 Speaker 1: just I just can't do it, Ash, Yes, I have. 703 00:35:13,120 --> 00:35:14,560 Speaker 1: I have one here. It's a bit of a long one. 704 00:35:14,640 --> 00:35:17,640 Speaker 1: I won't say her name. She would like to say anonymous, 705 00:35:17,640 --> 00:35:20,080 Speaker 1: and of course I will respect those wishes. You can, 706 00:35:20,160 --> 00:35:23,000 Speaker 1: of course, a reminder to everyone out there, you do 707 00:35:23,160 --> 00:35:24,120 Speaker 1: not have to give your name. 708 00:35:24,160 --> 00:35:25,240 Speaker 2: We don't want to cause divorce. 709 00:35:25,440 --> 00:35:30,640 Speaker 1: We don't do we We we should like invest, like 710 00:35:30,719 --> 00:35:32,480 Speaker 1: buy into a divorce lawyer. 711 00:35:33,760 --> 00:35:34,439 Speaker 2: And live on. 712 00:35:35,719 --> 00:35:38,239 Speaker 1: Okay, this is from to say a name. 713 00:35:38,480 --> 00:35:40,680 Speaker 2: I will not nearly. 714 00:35:40,960 --> 00:35:46,920 Speaker 1: My husband and I have just celebrated our five year anniversary, congratulations, 715 00:35:47,000 --> 00:35:52,160 Speaker 1: and we are pretty petty fantastic. The latest petty thing 716 00:35:52,200 --> 00:35:55,719 Speaker 1: I've done, however, is somewhat fair. Let us be the 717 00:35:55,800 --> 00:35:59,919 Speaker 1: judge of that, she says. Ash. I refuse to share 718 00:36:00,200 --> 00:36:06,120 Speaker 1: my pubic hair because he refuses to shave his mustache. 719 00:36:06,800 --> 00:36:10,759 Speaker 1: Whoa yeah, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Let me stop your 720 00:36:10,760 --> 00:36:13,759 Speaker 1: eye there, go on. There is nothing wrong with a 721 00:36:13,800 --> 00:36:17,440 Speaker 1: man's mustache, and there's nothing someone call it the womb broom. 722 00:36:17,800 --> 00:36:21,560 Speaker 1: There is nothing wrong with a hairy viageme. Absolutely not. 723 00:36:22,000 --> 00:36:26,040 Speaker 1: That both are beautiful in their own right. Yeah, let's continue, 724 00:36:26,760 --> 00:36:30,319 Speaker 1: she says. Let me explain. My husband is a firefighter 725 00:36:30,400 --> 00:36:32,359 Speaker 1: and they're not allowed to grow a beard, so they're 726 00:36:32,400 --> 00:36:34,319 Speaker 1: only allowed to grow a mustache, and they have to 727 00:36:34,360 --> 00:36:38,400 Speaker 1: have a clean shaven every shift. Her husband has decided, 728 00:36:38,480 --> 00:36:41,200 Speaker 1: yet again, to grow his mustache, but the issue is 729 00:36:41,560 --> 00:36:44,160 Speaker 1: he grows the thickest hairs on his upper lip, resulting 730 00:36:44,200 --> 00:36:48,480 Speaker 1: in what looks like a seventies pawn star stash that 731 00:36:48,600 --> 00:36:51,839 Speaker 1: never softens. So kissing him is like kissing a cactus. 732 00:36:52,040 --> 00:36:54,800 Speaker 2: So the petty thing is she just refuses to shave 733 00:36:55,680 --> 00:37:01,160 Speaker 2: a bush. He's probably like thinking good. 734 00:37:01,480 --> 00:37:07,279 Speaker 1: Maybe he likes it. He's getting the seventies pointster cash. 735 00:37:07,320 --> 00:37:10,799 Speaker 1: Maybe he likes a Harry bush downstairs. Maybe. Look, I 736 00:37:10,800 --> 00:37:14,080 Speaker 1: don't think it's that petty. I think it's it's beautiful 737 00:37:17,280 --> 00:37:20,080 Speaker 1: of the mustache, of the mustache and your bush. 738 00:37:22,600 --> 00:37:25,359 Speaker 2: Let's get us some listening questions, so I'll go first. Man, 739 00:37:25,400 --> 00:37:27,800 Speaker 2: I have a question, Well, I don't I always say that, 740 00:37:28,400 --> 00:37:31,280 Speaker 2: Taylor does. How do you cope when your partner's parents 741 00:37:31,320 --> 00:37:32,360 Speaker 2: don't like you? 742 00:37:33,600 --> 00:37:36,320 Speaker 1: I can't give an answer based on personal experience because 743 00:37:36,440 --> 00:37:40,920 Speaker 1: everyone has always loved me, and I've never had a 744 00:37:40,960 --> 00:37:44,760 Speaker 1: situation where a parent, yeah, they've always been pretty happy 745 00:37:44,760 --> 00:37:51,120 Speaker 1: that I've been dating their child. I played that very cool. 746 00:37:51,160 --> 00:37:54,920 Speaker 1: Then I know a friend. I have a friend I 747 00:37:54,960 --> 00:37:59,440 Speaker 1: won't say his name is Matthew. But they had a 748 00:37:59,520 --> 00:38:05,520 Speaker 1: similar scenario where this woman had gotten together with a 749 00:38:05,560 --> 00:38:08,960 Speaker 1: guy and she was lovely. She was you know, if 750 00:38:09,000 --> 00:38:13,640 Speaker 1: you're wanting someone to marry your son. This woman ticked 751 00:38:13,640 --> 00:38:14,320 Speaker 1: all the boxes. 752 00:38:14,560 --> 00:38:14,759 Speaker 2: You know. 753 00:38:14,920 --> 00:38:18,880 Speaker 1: She was considerate, she was kind, she was hardworking, she 754 00:38:18,920 --> 00:38:20,799 Speaker 1: had a lot of love to give, excited to be 755 00:38:20,840 --> 00:38:24,560 Speaker 1: a mom, also career driven, just like all around great person. 756 00:38:25,440 --> 00:38:29,680 Speaker 1: And yet from the get go the mom hated her. 757 00:38:29,880 --> 00:38:30,759 Speaker 2: The mother in law. 758 00:38:30,920 --> 00:38:33,840 Speaker 1: Mother in law. Okay, so the mother of the guy 759 00:38:34,640 --> 00:38:35,560 Speaker 1: hated this woman. 760 00:38:35,680 --> 00:38:37,360 Speaker 2: Do you think it's like like a bit of a 761 00:38:37,480 --> 00:38:39,600 Speaker 2: like a you're not good enough my son complex? 762 00:38:39,680 --> 00:38:41,920 Speaker 1: It was. It was down to the fact that the 763 00:38:42,040 --> 00:38:45,239 Speaker 1: mom thought she had an issue with the fact that 764 00:38:45,280 --> 00:38:47,000 Speaker 1: she was like losing her son. 765 00:38:47,239 --> 00:38:48,720 Speaker 2: Oh to another woman. 766 00:38:49,520 --> 00:38:53,239 Speaker 1: And it didn't matter what she did, she always like 767 00:38:53,360 --> 00:38:55,440 Speaker 1: had an issue with how she was doing things. Whether 768 00:38:55,480 --> 00:38:57,560 Speaker 1: it was like that's on the mom though, that's what 769 00:38:57,719 --> 00:39:00,399 Speaker 1: And it's similar to this scenario here is like what's 770 00:39:00,440 --> 00:39:03,960 Speaker 1: your reasoning, Like you're I know, it must be really hard. 771 00:39:04,000 --> 00:39:06,359 Speaker 1: I can imagine that when my children grow up when 772 00:39:06,360 --> 00:39:10,359 Speaker 1: they are, you know, having their own families, and then 773 00:39:10,480 --> 00:39:12,880 Speaker 1: you know, either will be a period where I'll be 774 00:39:12,960 --> 00:39:15,480 Speaker 1: like waving goodbye to them and they're all going to. 775 00:39:15,440 --> 00:39:17,840 Speaker 2: Hate them, unless it's a truly haterable person. 776 00:39:17,960 --> 00:39:22,560 Speaker 1: Yeah, if you're disliking your child's partner purely based on 777 00:39:22,560 --> 00:39:25,360 Speaker 1: the fact that you feel like the relationship is being removed, 778 00:39:26,360 --> 00:39:27,560 Speaker 1: grow the fuck up. 779 00:39:27,719 --> 00:39:29,560 Speaker 2: Yeah, totally, grow the fuck up. 780 00:39:30,160 --> 00:39:32,560 Speaker 1: The thing that sucks is, though, if you're on the 781 00:39:32,600 --> 00:39:36,879 Speaker 1: receiving end, you have to I think, just acknowledge that 782 00:39:36,880 --> 00:39:40,759 Speaker 1: that relationship, unfortunately, may never get better. The person who 783 00:39:40,760 --> 00:39:43,800 Speaker 1: I'm referring to, they've been married for almost ten years 784 00:39:43,840 --> 00:39:48,040 Speaker 1: now and the relationship has never progressed, never progressed that 785 00:39:48,200 --> 00:39:51,319 Speaker 1: level of tension. Question for you, Yes, do you have 786 00:39:51,400 --> 00:39:54,800 Speaker 1: any advice? This is This is from Charlotte. She asks, 787 00:39:54,880 --> 00:39:57,839 Speaker 1: do you have any advice for how you can get 788 00:39:57,920 --> 00:40:02,399 Speaker 1: your children to wipe their own b Oh? 789 00:40:03,239 --> 00:40:04,960 Speaker 2: No, Anyway, that. 790 00:40:05,200 --> 00:40:09,040 Speaker 1: Side tells me that you are a man who was defeated. Yeah, look, 791 00:40:09,480 --> 00:40:13,359 Speaker 1: I hate does Oscar. First of all, Oscar will sit 792 00:40:13,360 --> 00:40:15,520 Speaker 1: there on the toilet hee pool and you're going, mom, 793 00:40:15,680 --> 00:40:19,040 Speaker 1: it was like busy or something like, oh do it like, okay, 794 00:40:19,080 --> 00:40:20,000 Speaker 1: I'll do it, and he's like. 795 00:40:20,040 --> 00:40:25,200 Speaker 2: No, Mom, Like, first of all, ouch, it's not a 796 00:40:25,200 --> 00:40:28,840 Speaker 2: pleasure to wipe your asshole. But and I've been trying 797 00:40:28,840 --> 00:40:30,200 Speaker 2: to be like, you're going to have to do this 798 00:40:30,320 --> 00:40:33,719 Speaker 2: on your own, mainly because the other day I was 799 00:40:33,719 --> 00:40:37,560 Speaker 2: wiping his bart my finger slips through the toilet paper. Ah, 800 00:40:38,440 --> 00:40:41,440 Speaker 2: not good, not good, pool all over my finger. 801 00:40:41,560 --> 00:40:47,040 Speaker 1: Get that thing away from me. Fucking weird. Anyway, I 802 00:40:47,239 --> 00:40:49,600 Speaker 1: was like, so, make make him wipe his own bump, right. 803 00:40:49,680 --> 00:40:51,480 Speaker 2: I was like, you need to wipe your own bomb. 804 00:40:51,840 --> 00:40:53,840 Speaker 2: And he was like no, And I was like, okay, 805 00:40:54,160 --> 00:40:57,239 Speaker 2: And I've said this before. If you're not gonna wipe 806 00:40:57,320 --> 00:40:59,560 Speaker 2: your bum and I have to wipe your bum, that 807 00:40:59,640 --> 00:41:02,400 Speaker 2: means you have to wipe my bump from now on. 808 00:41:02,960 --> 00:41:05,920 Speaker 2: Oh and I made it sound as bad as it 809 00:41:05,960 --> 00:41:06,560 Speaker 2: actually is. 810 00:41:06,680 --> 00:41:09,480 Speaker 1: You gotta be careful because that could get your children 811 00:41:09,520 --> 00:41:10,239 Speaker 1: taken away from me. 812 00:41:11,640 --> 00:41:13,680 Speaker 2: I just wanted it to be like, oh no, why, 813 00:41:13,719 --> 00:41:16,880 Speaker 2: I'd much rather do my own. So far hasn't worked. 814 00:41:17,120 --> 00:41:20,520 Speaker 2: I still wipe in his butt, but and I even go, 815 00:41:20,719 --> 00:41:23,080 Speaker 2: I even do what he does, and I open the 816 00:41:23,080 --> 00:41:26,040 Speaker 2: door and I go oscar, like just to tease him. 817 00:41:26,239 --> 00:41:30,719 Speaker 1: This smell from the behind must be. 818 00:41:30,239 --> 00:41:32,439 Speaker 2: I opened the door, and I'm like, who am my kiding? 819 00:41:32,440 --> 00:41:37,359 Speaker 2: The door's already opened. I'm like, Oscar can't wipe my butt, no, like, 820 00:41:37,760 --> 00:41:38,880 Speaker 2: So I'm working on him. 821 00:41:38,880 --> 00:41:42,280 Speaker 1: I'm wearing him down because even when I have had Marley, 822 00:41:42,360 --> 00:41:45,120 Speaker 1: who's now almost five, wipe her own bump, it's just 823 00:41:45,160 --> 00:41:45,840 Speaker 1: making a mess. 824 00:41:45,880 --> 00:41:47,080 Speaker 2: So you'd much rather just do it. 825 00:41:47,280 --> 00:41:49,680 Speaker 1: Yeah, I just do it properly Otherwise, otherwise she's going 826 00:41:49,760 --> 00:41:53,520 Speaker 1: to be like, just smear shit literally everywhere on the 827 00:41:53,560 --> 00:41:55,719 Speaker 1: toilet seat on her backside, and she'll whip her under 828 00:41:55,719 --> 00:41:57,440 Speaker 1: his own and get dressed and be like one finished. 829 00:41:57,960 --> 00:42:01,799 Speaker 1: She doesn't understand like that, you have to wipe until 830 00:42:01,960 --> 00:42:03,000 Speaker 1: the toilet paper's clean. 831 00:42:03,360 --> 00:42:04,919 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like that time where I told that story 832 00:42:04,960 --> 00:42:06,640 Speaker 2: where Oscar pooped in the back of the that and 833 00:42:06,680 --> 00:42:08,160 Speaker 2: the in flicked against the wall and it hit the 834 00:42:08,200 --> 00:42:09,680 Speaker 2: wall and slid down the tile ball. 835 00:42:09,760 --> 00:42:12,000 Speaker 1: Yeah, they don't understand it. They don't get it. They 836 00:42:12,000 --> 00:42:14,480 Speaker 1: don't get it. So I've got no advice. Then I. 837 00:42:15,960 --> 00:42:18,719 Speaker 2: Just persevere until they move out. Before we go, Matt, 838 00:42:18,800 --> 00:42:22,319 Speaker 2: we do have a little treat okay, off the back 839 00:42:22,360 --> 00:42:25,280 Speaker 2: of our little stone and would chat earlier if something's 840 00:42:25,320 --> 00:42:25,880 Speaker 2: come up. 841 00:42:25,760 --> 00:42:30,480 Speaker 1: It's naked photos of ash with no, it's just the 842 00:42:30,520 --> 00:42:31,960 Speaker 1: cases of Stone and with themselves. 843 00:42:32,040 --> 00:42:35,319 Speaker 2: Yes, to celebrate the release of the wood fired port, 844 00:42:35,560 --> 00:42:38,680 Speaker 2: we have a carton to give away, Matt. How does 845 00:42:38,680 --> 00:42:39,239 Speaker 2: someone win this? 846 00:42:39,520 --> 00:42:41,040 Speaker 1: All you have to do is share a story of 847 00:42:41,080 --> 00:42:43,920 Speaker 1: yourself listening to two doting dads tag us, tag Stone 848 00:42:43,920 --> 00:42:46,680 Speaker 1: and would follow both accounts and we'll pick someone at 849 00:42:46,800 --> 00:42:49,839 Speaker 1: random to win the case of beer. And we'll pick 850 00:42:49,880 --> 00:42:53,160 Speaker 1: someone at random. Can I win this one? You already 851 00:42:53,239 --> 00:42:55,960 Speaker 1: have like twelve cases in your garage? I would need 852 00:42:56,000 --> 00:43:00,640 Speaker 1: one more ash. We better we better back up, mate, 853 00:43:00,680 --> 00:43:03,319 Speaker 1: because it's time for lunch and I need to drive 854 00:43:03,440 --> 00:43:05,640 Speaker 1: back to Bondai, which will take me back. 855 00:43:05,480 --> 00:43:07,400 Speaker 2: To the motherland quickreat. 856 00:43:08,200 --> 00:43:10,239 Speaker 1: But if you have enjoyed this episode, we would love 857 00:43:10,239 --> 00:43:11,879 Speaker 1: it if you would share it with anyone else out 858 00:43:11,880 --> 00:43:14,279 Speaker 1: there who you think may benefit from two idiots talking 859 00:43:14,280 --> 00:43:17,320 Speaker 1: about the hardships of parenting. Maybe give us a review. 860 00:43:17,440 --> 00:43:21,680 Speaker 1: Maybe it'd be nice spot people. Okay, can I just 861 00:43:21,680 --> 00:43:23,920 Speaker 1: can I have a qualm with people who give us 862 00:43:24,480 --> 00:43:25,520 Speaker 1: a five star. 863 00:43:25,400 --> 00:43:27,880 Speaker 2: Rating and don't leave it and don't leave any comments. 864 00:43:28,320 --> 00:43:30,720 Speaker 1: Just just I will not wipe your bump. No, yes, 865 00:43:31,600 --> 00:43:32,520 Speaker 1: don't appreciate it. 866 00:43:32,640 --> 00:43:37,000 Speaker 2: Four point nine stars is apparently, let's yeah. Whoever's bringing 867 00:43:37,080 --> 00:43:38,520 Speaker 2: us down that point one. 868 00:43:39,920 --> 00:43:49,000 Speaker 1: Lookout, but we'll see you guys next episode two. Doting 869 00:43:49,040 --> 00:43:53,200 Speaker 1: Dad's podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout Australia 870 00:43:53,320 --> 00:43:55,880 Speaker 1: and the connections to land, see and community. 871 00:43:56,120 --> 00:43:58,640 Speaker 2: We pay our respects to their elders past and present 872 00:43:58,680 --> 00:44:01,799 Speaker 2: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestrate Island of. 873 00:44:01,800 --> 00:44:02,520 Speaker 1: Peoples to day. 874 00:44:03,120 --> 00:44:05,439 Speaker 2: This episode was recorded on Gadagal Land