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Speaker 1: It is Christmas time. I have already started doing some

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Speaker 1: of my Christmas shopping, which is unusual for me.

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Speaker 2: I'm very importing.

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Speaker 1: Some people have been doing it for weeks, but I

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Speaker 1: went in for probably about two weeks ago for the

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Speaker 1: first time to do a bit of a reconnaissance mission

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Speaker 1: looking for ideas. I noticed a certain theme. Still, toilet

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Speaker 1: humor is definitely in this Christmas. I think that the

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Speaker 1: stockists at Kmart in this case have been inspired a

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Speaker 1: little too much by South Park Christmas.

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Speaker 2: Hello mister Hanky and Merry Christmas. You see wis thanks

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Speaker 2: sir Christmas out here?

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Speaker 1: I mean now, on one shelf I found a fart machine. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: with fifteen oh different, what is that fart sounds? Sorry, Look,

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Speaker 1: I'm very sorry for anybody having breakfast at the moment.

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Speaker 1: But hey, look, I'm just going to tell it as

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Speaker 1: it is at the moment, because if you go into

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Speaker 1: the shops this is going to confront you too. There

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Speaker 1: is a toilet timer that you can buy where you

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Speaker 1: can let others know when it's safe to go. It

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Speaker 1: ranges from safe to enter to pretty pongy to warning toxic.

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Speaker 1: There is a toilet basketball set slam dunk while you, yeah,

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Speaker 1: slam dunk, while you well, you know, slam dunk. Now

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Speaker 1: I found something for you, Lisa, did you I did.

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Speaker 1: I found something that you didn't. No, I did butt

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Speaker 1: put butt head that has that's the image. It has

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Speaker 1: six different sound effects.

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Speaker 3: Oh, no, I had an image of something else. It

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Speaker 3: wouldn't have been in the toy department.

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Speaker 1: The fishing for floaters poop game. What No, I'm serious.

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Speaker 1: This is on the shelves the car.

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Speaker 2: Don't fishing fom floated.

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Speaker 1: I don't condone this. I am just reporting the facts

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Speaker 1: back to you. This is what could be turning up

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Speaker 1: under Christmas trees all the world, all around Australia, certainly

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Speaker 1: all around Earth.

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Speaker 3: Is Christmas knucklebones or coplunk or any of that coplunk?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I think that might be the toilet bas Let.

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Speaker 3: Me pick another game, hungry Hungry her bos No.

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Speaker 2: Just farty stuff.

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Speaker 1: That's farty stuff. No, toilet humor is definitely the theme

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Speaker 1: this Christmas. It's in So if that is your thing, yes,

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Speaker 1: you'll definitely find it. Now, this is what I saw.

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Speaker 1: It came up, but I'm sure they're not the only

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Speaker 1: ones doing it. These are the gifts to give this

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Speaker 1: Christmas to someone, to someone you love, okay, because nothing

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Speaker 1: says or sells Christmas.

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Speaker 3: Quite like Chrismere's time wouldn't be the same without hugs

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Speaker 3: and kisses in a poochy train because, as you just

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Speaker 3: discovered recently, rustle the shelves.

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Speaker 1: As I wash, As I so eloquently put.

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Speaker 3: It, the shoves are a wash with toilet humor games

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Speaker 3: for kids, and it would seem that not much has changed,

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Speaker 3: because it reminds me of the toy that my nieces,

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Speaker 3: my great nieces Taylor and Charlie god but bos of

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Speaker 3: us about ten years ago, now it's a while ago,

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Speaker 3: called Doggie Do, the board game that involves a toy

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Speaker 3: sausage dog which you fed plaster sini stuff too and

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Speaker 3: then squeezed its lead up. You roll the dice and

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Speaker 3: squeezed the lead as the plast scene passes through said

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Speaker 3: toy sausage dog, and when it comes out the other side,

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Speaker 3: you're the loser.

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Speaker 2: This is basically how the ad went.

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Speaker 4: If you poofs you lose one one, listen to the

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Speaker 4: nicest thing mate, three ah.

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Speaker 2: And with that it came out and he lost the game?

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Speaker 1: Was that in the educational Department, because I'm thinking that's

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Speaker 1: really handy for kids who want to become vets. You

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Speaker 1: know what I'm saying. It's like, this is how it

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Speaker 1: works kids.

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Speaker 2: I just googled is the Doggy Doo Game educational?

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Speaker 3: And it says the game not only entertains, but also

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Speaker 3: helps develop fine motor skills, encourages friendly competition among players.

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Speaker 3: It's a fantastic way for kids to bond with their

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Speaker 3: peers while enjoying a lighthearted and silly theme.

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Speaker 2: Well, we did a fair bit of bonding over it.

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Speaker 3: That day, that's for sure, mostly as older ones there.

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Speaker 2: That's not too bad. It was just purple plus.

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Speaker 1: That's all right.

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Speaker 2: But yeah, that was the Doggie Doo Game.

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Speaker 1: I like it.

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Speaker 2: I wonder what's going to be under the tree this year?

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Speaker 1: Sounds like a matel classic.

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Speaker 3: Right, Let's get a dowling downs. Good morning, Kristen, morning christ.

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Speaker 5: Morning, guys.

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Speaker 1: How are you good?

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Speaker 2: What was under the tree?

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Speaker 5: This is what I've recently seen on TIMU as a

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Speaker 5: docking stuffer. Okay, it's a plus six seven doll. So

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Speaker 5: it's a number six, a number seven joined together with

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Speaker 5: arms and legs and eyes.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, this six seventh thing is just out

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Speaker 1: of control. I still don't understand it, and I don't

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Speaker 1: want it.

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Speaker 2: I don't know. Yeah, well you've got a better chance

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Speaker 2: than me.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, well that's that's if I bothered to inquire. I

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Speaker 1: don't know, Christen, I think I'd rather the toilet toilet,

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Speaker 1: maybe a bit of slam dunk on the back.

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Speaker 2: Of the wall, tu under the tree.

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Speaker 1: Thanks Kristen, thank you. Yeah, the gift that keeps giving

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Speaker 1: for Christmas.

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Speaker 3: Up, I have seen you have sent through the most

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Speaker 3: disturbing photo that I had laid eyes on this week.

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Speaker 2: Anyway, talk us through it.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, my daughter she wanted to go see the municipal

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Speaker 6: Waist concert and I only had a set of tickets

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Speaker 6: for a Christmas present, which would have.

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Speaker 2: Been a cart Yeah.

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Speaker 6: And anyway, she may be going watch Sore ten I

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Speaker 6: think it was ten or eleven, one of them. Yeah,

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Speaker 6: I had to go watch that.

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Speaker 5: Yeah.

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Speaker 6: And then as a joke on Marketplace, I've seen a

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Speaker 6: necklace of ears. I think it's the Walking Dead.

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Speaker 3: Yes, it's Darren's necklace much yes, yeah.

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Speaker 6: Oh yeah, collectible and anyway, so it never got used,

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Speaker 6: but apparently you just hang it around your neck and

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Speaker 6: it puts a fragrance on your like a necklace, but

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Speaker 6: you don't actually wash yourself with it.

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Speaker 2: Oh you don't use it like a soap on a rope.

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Speaker 6: You just no, no, you just hang it around your

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Speaker 6: neck and jumped. I think it's like in a box

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Speaker 6: frame from Red Dott or whoever.

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Speaker 3: It's beautiful, it's original, it's glorious.

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Speaker 1: Thank you Paul.

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Speaker 2: That's going to stay with me all day.

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Speaker 1: And I thought what I saw on the shelves was tacky.

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Speaker 1: That nothing compared to the dead the walking on a rope.

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Speaker 3: Daryl made that necklace, I think to mask his smell

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Speaker 3: or something from the walkers. And if you're looking for

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Speaker 3: something under the tree for this year, I saw a

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Speaker 3: fantastic meme the other day from from from a mum

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Speaker 3: who said every package, jar and carton and boxer goes

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Speaker 3: back in the pantry and fridge empty.

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Speaker 2: From her family, it's getting wrapped up and going under the.

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Speaker 1: I want to do that.

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Speaker 2: You should.

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Speaker 1: Yes spoiled Christmas and send them a message at the

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Speaker 1: same time.

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Speaker 2: Yes, it's a little educational experiment.

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Speaker 1: Coral in high Wickham weirdest thing under the tree?

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Speaker 7: Oh hi there, good morning. So my dad is an

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Speaker 7: avid jigsaw man. So last Christmas, the grandkids are brought

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Speaker 7: in this fantastic jigsaw puzzle one thousand pieces, and in

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Speaker 7: keeping with your Pooh theme, it was a hundred pooping puppy.

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Speaker 8: God.

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Speaker 7: He was pretty much disgusted because he's such a jigsaw enthusiast.

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Speaker 7: He did it, and he goes it was all green

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Speaker 7: grass and trees, puppies and all this brown stuff. So

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Speaker 7: he did it and then he gave it back to

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Speaker 7: me and said I want to see it again.

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Speaker 1: He didn't get it put on a board and framed

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Speaker 1: and up on the wall. The kids for the achievement

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Speaker 1: of putting it together.

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Speaker 3: The kids must have thought it was the funniest thing

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Speaker 3: that had ever happened in the history of funny things.

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Speaker 7: Absolutely, everyone can have a flower jigsaw. Yeah no, this

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Speaker 7: was puppies. I think you can get a calendar now, but.

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Speaker 1: Lovely yes, calendars, no much, it's not the same, you know, challenge.

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Speaker 2: No, no thanks. Definitely a theme under the tree.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it seems to be so weirdest thing under the

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Speaker 1: tree we could be this Christmas could be last Christmas

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Speaker 1: from many Christmases ago.

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Speaker 3: Have you seen the have you seen the text Murray

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Speaker 3: is just sent through the Pooping puppy calendar.

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Speaker 1: Google it.

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Speaker 2: It's twenty twenty six.

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Speaker 3: So it says dogs pooping in beautiful places.

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Speaker 1: Dogs spoiling otherwise perfect photos. Oh no, so there you go.

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Speaker 1: There's a gift giving idea for you right there. Just

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Speaker 1: google it dogs pooping in Beautiful Places for twenty twenty.

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Speaker 3: In Hillary has to say, there was once a six

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Speaker 3: pack of ringpool cans of Chardonnaye under the tree.

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Speaker 2: Bernard King would be rolling in his grave.

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Speaker 1: Classy, classy.

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Speaker 3: First, do you remember the Bernadettes burned King and the

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Speaker 3: Bernadettes would all be rolling in their grave. And Bowen

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Speaker 3: Rockingham says he got that dog pooping calendar. It's a

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Speaker 3: calendar of dogs pooping in beautiful places as a secret

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Speaker 3: stantic if from work two years ago. It couldn't even

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Speaker 3: give it away, nobody wanted it. It's never been used.

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Speaker 1: Didn't even hang it up himself. Unbelievable. Serena is in Quanana.

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Speaker 1: Good morning, Serena, good morning.

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Speaker 2: What's under the tree.

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Speaker 9: Well, we have an extended family Christmas every day. Yeah,

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Speaker 9: and theme is bad taste skiffs.

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Speaker 2: Oh nice.

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Speaker 9: Yeah, So there's lots of things, But in keeping with

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Speaker 9: your poo sme, the best one was my nephew's fart

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Speaker 9: in a jar.

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Speaker 2: Fart in a jar?

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Speaker 9: Can I tell you like it was a real one, a.

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Speaker 3: Real one, verified fart in a jam because he opened

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Speaker 3: it and.

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Speaker 1: Your family's next level, Serena.

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Speaker 3: Honestly, what is with the theme of these Christmas times?

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Speaker 1: Christmas has gone off the rails.

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Speaker 2: This is not what it used.

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Speaker 9: There's a few that I can't mention on the radio.

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Speaker 2: Yes, I bet it sounds like fu though, oh my god,

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Speaker 2: it is fun.

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Speaker 9: And there's a few that do the rounds, like the

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Speaker 9: big granny nickers with a crutch.

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Speaker 8: Cutter out.

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Speaker 2: Get three gifts of year after year.

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Speaker 9: Yeah, and the that's a phelic symbol.

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Speaker 2: Which okay, yes.

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Speaker 1: We may have seen that one, that one adventure BALI

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Speaker 1: all right, thanks, Serena, Serena, I hope you get something

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Speaker 1: nice this year. Good Lord, Christy.

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Speaker 3: And Merriton, good morning, good morning, are you good? What

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Speaker 3: was the weirdest thing that was under the Christmas tree?

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Speaker 8: Well, I've never heard of it before. I got one,

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Speaker 8: and I'd to think you guys having It's called a brush?

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Speaker 8: What a liky brush?

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Speaker 2: A likky brush.

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Speaker 8: Yeah, so it's a it's a cat tongue and you

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Speaker 8: stick it in your mouth and it's got the form

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Speaker 8: of a cat tongue with a little spokesman.

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Speaker 3: No, oh, that's an icky brush, not a liky brush.

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Speaker 8: You can google it if you want to have a

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Speaker 8: look at a best part. It glows in the dark.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god.

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Speaker 1: So yeah, you wouldn't look weird at all using all that.

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Speaker 6: I didn't use it.

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Speaker 1: No, so where is it?

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Speaker 8: Well, it's taking an adventure with the bin.

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Speaker 2: Is it is? It?

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Speaker 7: Was?

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Speaker 2: It? Is it to clean your tongue?

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Speaker 8: No, it's not a cat if you've got a cat. Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 8: so you stick it in your mouth and the cat's

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Speaker 8: supposed to come up and he rubbed themselves and oh

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Speaker 8: backs yourselves on your the liky tongue.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, I love my cats.

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Speaker 1: But it's really not like that.

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Speaker 8: Yeah. But that's so if you google you'll see pictures

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Speaker 8: of it.

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Speaker 1: There you go, perfect for regifting.

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Speaker 3: I think I think that is that is so weird

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Speaker 3: that elicited such a reaction that you've got to be

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Speaker 3: our winner today.

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Speaker 2: Christy