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Speaker 1: And Lisa. We're not alone this morning. It's a revolving

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Speaker 1: studio door, isn't it. We've joined by a special guest

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Speaker 1: from the other side of the.

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Speaker 2: Glass, our producer, Lise is where the Hello lives everywhere. Now,

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Speaker 2: your dad eightieth birthday?

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Speaker 3: Was it on the weekends? He's an octagenarian now, yes.

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Speaker 2: Yes, And there was a big party and you were

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Speaker 2: tasked with the toast. But it was a roast.

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Speaker 3: Well intentionally or.

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Speaker 1: As master of ceremonies, did you turn it from a

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Speaker 1: toast into a row?

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Speaker 3: It kind of went from toast to row? Oh?

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Speaker 2: Okay, so it was it was meant to be a toast, meant.

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Speaker 3: To be a toast. But in my show, in my

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Speaker 3: show that his friends saw, everyone said I went too

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Speaker 3: easy on him, turned into the row.

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Speaker 2: Okay they I mean he had to have an inkling

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Speaker 2: that it was coming. He's known you all his life,

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Speaker 2: your life.

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Speaker 3: It was one of those moments where I was like,

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Speaker 3: once I started to write the roast, where do you stop?

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Speaker 3: Where do you start? It was actually very overwhelming.

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Speaker 1: There was a lot of stories.

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Speaker 2: Many are there any bits so she want to share?

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Speaker 3: I highlighted a bits from the speege okay, I sort

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Speaker 3: of started it up pretty lightly, talking about my dad's

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Speaker 3: mischievous nature and love of pranks. Nice and also I

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Speaker 3: was a really gullible child, so it was quite easy

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Speaker 3: to get me. And one time he was wearing a

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Speaker 3: pre jeans and he'd stuck a pair of socks down

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Speaker 3: the back and told me he'd poot his pants. And

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Speaker 3: I went to school the next day and for morning

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Speaker 3: news told everyone that he crap.

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Speaker 2: Show and Tell.

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Speaker 1: And it was a sizable one too.

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Speaker 3: It was everyone knew he was the dad that pooted

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Speaker 3: his pants, and that got brought up at parent teacher meeting,

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Speaker 3: so like stuff like that would happen. We were in

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Speaker 3: a motorbike crash when I was four years old in

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Speaker 3: Lean Cowie. My parents decided they'd always wanted to ride

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Speaker 3: a motorbike, so why not put the four year old

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Speaker 3: in the basket on the front, And we actually had

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Speaker 3: an accident and me and my mom were unscathed, but

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Speaker 3: my dad, unbeknownst to us, had broken multiple ribs and

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Speaker 3: my mom was just like, get on with it, we're

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Speaker 3: all fine. She made him climb a dormant volcano and

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Speaker 3: then later that night crippled in pain. He was like,

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Speaker 3: I've got to go to the hospital. So he tried

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Speaker 3: to walk to the local hospital, fell into an open

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Speaker 3: sewer and had to be hosed to be hosed down. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: from human feces and cowies. Great. Great, like a nurse's staff.

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Speaker 3: Nine Australian dollars. It costs to go to hospital there

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Speaker 3: to get everything done, so that was great.

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Speaker 1: How much to the hosing down cost?

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Speaker 3: That was probably more absolutely, and then there was another

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Speaker 3: one here. Oh, he loves Audi. I mean most dads

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Speaker 3: love Audi.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's all like this.

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Speaker 3: Supermarkets. It's all the PG stuff for radio. And he

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Speaker 3: really wanted to get a pair of gun boots to

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Speaker 3: go dog walking because the dogs sometimes go into the pond.

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Speaker 3: And they didn't have his size, but they had the

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Speaker 3: pink female gum boots in his size. So he goes,

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Speaker 3: I'll try him on for size, see how they go.

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Speaker 3: But they got stuck on his calf's and he couldn't

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Speaker 3: get him off. So he's down on the grind. I'm

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Speaker 3: trying to get them off.

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Speaker 2: He's quite old.

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Speaker 3: A crowd gather around him overhead. We need help in

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Speaker 3: the middle aisle. We've got a gentleman that needs assistance

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Speaker 3: in the middle aisle. More people, crowd managers come, but

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Speaker 3: scissors are brought out. They're going to do a surgical removal.

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Speaker 2: You break them, you buy, Okay, you need that jin

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Speaker 2: knife for this.

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Speaker 3: Managed. I think they oiled him up and got them off.

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Speaker 3: So yeah, and just everything.

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Speaker 2: So he was close to the spice, spice and oil

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Speaker 2: asle and.

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Speaker 3: All right, I'll just end up with this one really quickly.

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Speaker 3: He had a really he had a favorite expensive woolen jumper.

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Speaker 3: He left it at this Italian restaurant that we used

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Speaker 3: to always go to. He called up and was like, hey,

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Speaker 3: I think I left my jumper here. The owner said, no,

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Speaker 3: we haven't got it. A few weeks later, my dad

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Speaker 3: sees the owner's son walking around wearing it. My dad

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Speaker 3: goes back in the dead and like at night time

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Speaker 3: and lets this guy's car tires down as payback.

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Speaker 2: Don't miss with mister Walker. Take away from.

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Speaker 1: This absolutely, thank you, Liz, thank you.

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Speaker 2: Was it a good night.

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Speaker 3: Everyone had a lot of fun.

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Speaker 1: What about him?

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Speaker 2: He did, Actually he did tell him Happy birthday from

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Speaker 2: us toast to roast. Yes it happens. It's a fine line.

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Speaker 2: Mel In Woodridge, good morning.

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Speaker 4: Good morning, When did a toast.

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Speaker 2: Turn into a bit of a roast?

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Speaker 4: Oh, it was recently at my dad's lady his best mate, Doug,

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Speaker 4: who had married a woman called Dianne years ago and

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Speaker 4: ended badly, and he then married a lady called Dawn.

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Speaker 4: So he was up making it post to my dad

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Speaker 4: because he was his best mate with his speedway pick

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Speaker 4: through with him started talking about his wife and he

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Speaker 4: was saying Diane an uh oh yes, and so there

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Speaker 4: was a lot of gasts, and everyone was looking at

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Speaker 4: Dawn and she was she was kind of laughing nervously,

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Speaker 4: but she was actually a bit upset because he started

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Speaker 4: going on about Diane, my wife, Diane, and I'm yeah,

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Speaker 4: it was very very bad. Everyone was gasting and looking

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Speaker 4: at Dawn because everyone knew, like because that his first

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Speaker 4: marriage ended badly.

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Speaker 2: Eventually, you know, tweak with him. Did he do the

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Speaker 2: whole speech.

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Speaker 4: No, he kind of got three quarters of the way

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Speaker 4: through it, and then he I think he noticed everyone

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Speaker 4: was ghasting, and his wife looked a bit bit upsets, and.

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Speaker 1: Then there was a rush of blood blood from the body, and.

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Speaker 4: He went, yeah, his face was very red and he

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Speaker 4: apologized and said that's what happens when you marry a

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Speaker 4: Diane and then a Dawn, and.

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Speaker 1: Then and then Dawn said, come on, we're going giants.

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Speaker 2: Shovel just was going deeper and deeper, thank smell.

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Speaker 1: Awkward. And that moment of realization for him would be

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Speaker 1: you know how you just get that cold flash. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's like the blood has left your body and you go,

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Speaker 1: oh no,