WEBVTT - MINI: Christian At The Cinema

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<v Speaker 1>I Heart Podcasts. You can hear more gold when I

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<v Speaker 1>four point three podcasts, playlist and listen live on the

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<v Speaker 1>free iHeart app Got anything good? Hey, this is the

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<v Speaker 1>Christian O'Connell show podcast. Let me tell you about what

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<v Speaker 1>happens Saturday night. All right, So you're going to be

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<v Speaker 1>stunned that I said nothing, but you need to understand

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<v Speaker 1>in certain ways, I am becoming Australian having Australian passport,

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<v Speaker 1>but there are certain characteristics and behavior you can't deny

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<v Speaker 1>your DNA and where your raised. I am an Englishman

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<v Speaker 1>and there's something in our DNA you cannot stand the

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<v Speaker 1>thought of causing a scene. However, it is extreme what

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<v Speaker 1>happened to me Saturday night? So I went to see

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<v Speaker 1>this Elvis movie epic Elvis Live in Concept. As I

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<v Speaker 1>take my seat, I've got my glass of red wine

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<v Speaker 1>and my snacks. I'm good to go. I sit down

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<v Speaker 1>next to an elderly couple. They are a bickering. They're

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<v Speaker 1>really having a real full on bicker. They are I'm

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<v Speaker 1>guessing late seventies. As I'm sitting down, the credits are

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<v Speaker 1>starting to come and tell us about forthcoming feature presentations

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<v Speaker 1>at the cinema. They're still bickering, okay, and people are

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<v Speaker 1>starting to like tup. But I don't know whether the

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<v Speaker 1>mixt of them being old. They've also, you can tell,

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<v Speaker 1>had a couple of drinks. I'd simply lean over and say, hey,

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<v Speaker 1>everything all right? Right, She goes, he's forgotten his deafadeh.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm like, I said, well, look, I said, we're two

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<v Speaker 1>rows from the screen, because we were two rows from

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<v Speaker 1>the screen of a very big screen. I'm sure he's

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<v Speaker 1>going to pick up enough of what's happening. It's Elvis

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<v Speaker 1>live in concerts. They've obviously been around for a while.

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<v Speaker 1>But she goes, he's only going to hear some of it.

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<v Speaker 1>And I'm like, okay, and they start bickering. I'm saying,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm sure it's gonna be fine, and then she goes

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<v Speaker 1>to me. She leans over because he's in between us.

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<v Speaker 1>She leans on to me and goes, you can tell

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<v Speaker 1>him what he can't hear. Then ah nah, six bats down.

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<v Speaker 1>So five minutes in, I swear to God, Malcolm, we

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<v Speaker 1>became that close friends, leans leans over. It's the first

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<v Speaker 1>of many times, and goes away, Oh, I think you

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<v Speaker 1>got kidding me. I'll tell you what he said, suspicially

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<v Speaker 1>he's singing the whole thing is him live and got it?

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<v Speaker 1>He said, suspicious minds? Did you sing it back to him?

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<v Speaker 1>What did I felt like? And shall I go and

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<v Speaker 1>get the deaf fade? Where is it? She says, he's

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<v Speaker 1>partially deaf? And what does that mean? For the next

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<v Speaker 1>nineteen minutes? That's only the beginning of things with me

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<v Speaker 1>and Malcolm. Ten minutes in he puts his hand into

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<v Speaker 1>my popcorn that I haven't done and starts chomping on it.

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<v Speaker 1>Right I'm thinking, there's this woman next to me who

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<v Speaker 1>nudges me like he because that's not it's the optics

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<v Speaker 1>on because suddenly I'm having partially hearing man accusing of

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<v Speaker 1>stealing my popcorn. It's not a good look for me,

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<v Speaker 1>not like no, he really is rocking a hard place,

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<v Speaker 1>so I say nothing. Let him. I didn't touch the

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<v Speaker 1>popcorn his hand when in there. By the time he's

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<v Speaker 1>had three goes in there and he's chomping away, putting

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<v Speaker 1>it in his pie hole. I'm thinking, it's now Malcolm's popcorn.

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<v Speaker 2>But you should have what he should have done when

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<v Speaker 2>he went to put his hand in the popcorn you

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<v Speaker 2>put your hand in the popcorn as well, graze his hand.

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<v Speaker 2>Then you go, oh sorry, and you go, wait a minute,

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<v Speaker 2>this is my popcorn.

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<v Speaker 1>Because then what if he'd have said, he's confused as

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<v Speaker 1>it is, it's my popcorn. I didn't get thrown out.

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<v Speaker 1>There's a headline today. I would have given his knuckles

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<v Speaker 1>a bit of a smack. I can't know, Malcolm, get

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<v Speaker 1>out of it. I can't. And then then he does

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<v Speaker 1>the biggest move out of this. It came in threes.

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<v Speaker 1>There was a translate in the Elvis movie him eating

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<v Speaker 1>my popcorn, and now he unwraps, non stopping. You have

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<v Speaker 1>to draw last time. You have to stand for tob

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<v Speaker 1>This is my cinema dinner, Malcolm. Malcolm, he such an

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<v Speaker 1>unwrap a tob tobro is that it's not easy to

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<v Speaker 1>get one of those out either. That's not a casual thing, Malcolm.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't mind the popcorn, but the tobon. God damn it.

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<v Speaker 2>He would have known he didn't buy a toddler own

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<v Speaker 2>as well. This is an active aggression.

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<v Speaker 1>So again I'm just unders thinking. I just gotta let

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<v Speaker 1>it all go. I've just got to let it go.

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<v Speaker 1>You have to stand up for yourself. Man, I said

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<v Speaker 1>nothing about the popcorn. He took my tobleron, not just that.

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<v Speaker 1>Twenty minutes later, the lady who's next to me nudges

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<v Speaker 1>me to go and check it out. Now the toblain's

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<v Speaker 1>been moved. His wife, she's having something. Stop. No, I

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<v Speaker 1>know what this is.

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<v Speaker 2>I reckon. You know how old people are always getting scammed.

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<v Speaker 2>I reckon they're now re scamming the young people.

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<v Speaker 1>I reckon.

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<v Speaker 2>This is some sort of griff they do where he

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<v Speaker 2>pretends to be dead.

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<v Speaker 1>It's a long cont your toddler. They got played. He

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<v Speaker 1>got a free cinema dinner and came out and they're

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<v Speaker 1>ravished though he goes. If he goes to the red Wine,

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<v Speaker 1>then we're throwing we're throwing it down. It's on, Malcolm.

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<v Speaker 1>You can take the popcorn, okay, and I'm not happy

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<v Speaker 1>about the toblerone, but leave the red wine. I said nothing.

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<v Speaker 1>The Christian O'Connell Show go On podcast