1 00:00:04,120 --> 00:00:06,519 Speaker 1: It's the Happy Families podcast. 2 00:00:07,080 --> 00:00:10,320 Speaker 2: It's the podcast for the time poor parent who just 3 00:00:10,440 --> 00:00:11,320 Speaker 2: wants answers. 4 00:00:11,400 --> 00:00:15,960 Speaker 1: Now, we're going to have some problems in today's I'll 5 00:00:15,960 --> 00:00:19,880 Speaker 1: do a Better Tomorrow. We're quibling over whose story Today's 6 00:00:20,440 --> 00:00:22,840 Speaker 1: I'll do better Tomorrow is, and it's mine. I can 7 00:00:22,840 --> 00:00:27,680 Speaker 1: tell you that right now. The other thing is if 8 00:00:27,760 --> 00:00:30,840 Speaker 1: I leave your microphone, if I get it, oh that's unfair. 9 00:00:30,880 --> 00:00:31,600 Speaker 1: Let me send it on. 10 00:00:31,760 --> 00:00:32,920 Speaker 2: You're so squack. 11 00:00:34,760 --> 00:00:37,320 Speaker 1: This is doctor Justin Wilson. I'm here with my wife 12 00:00:37,360 --> 00:00:39,320 Speaker 1: and mum. We our six kids. Had a really cool 13 00:00:39,720 --> 00:00:41,880 Speaker 1: experience the other day. We've gone for our bike ride 14 00:00:42,360 --> 00:00:46,120 Speaker 1: because you're now getting fit. And following the bike ride, 15 00:00:46,159 --> 00:00:47,960 Speaker 1: I went and had my swim down at the local pool. 16 00:00:48,280 --> 00:00:50,279 Speaker 1: Bashed out a couple of kays in the pool, and 17 00:00:50,320 --> 00:00:52,199 Speaker 1: on the way back, I thought, I'll stop and check 18 00:00:52,240 --> 00:00:54,960 Speaker 1: the surf, because not that I have time to do everything, 19 00:00:55,000 --> 00:00:56,240 Speaker 1: but I'm going to have a look at the surf. 20 00:00:56,840 --> 00:00:58,800 Speaker 1: And it was really good, and I wanted to hang 21 00:00:58,840 --> 00:01:01,360 Speaker 1: around there for a while, but I had work to do. 22 00:01:01,840 --> 00:01:05,440 Speaker 1: But I was standing there and somebody said, oh my goodness, 23 00:01:05,560 --> 00:01:08,399 Speaker 1: I can't believe who I'm standing next to, and I 24 00:01:08,480 --> 00:01:10,080 Speaker 1: just love it when people know who I am and 25 00:01:10,080 --> 00:01:11,920 Speaker 1: want to say hi because we've made a difference in 26 00:01:11,920 --> 00:01:14,360 Speaker 1: their lives. And it was Jess who listened to the 27 00:01:14,400 --> 00:01:17,440 Speaker 1: podcast visiting the Sunshine Coast from Melbourne with her husband 28 00:01:17,680 --> 00:01:20,000 Speaker 1: and they had a great chat while we watched the 29 00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:22,160 Speaker 1: surf and it was it's just beautiful. I love when 30 00:01:22,160 --> 00:01:24,840 Speaker 1: people say hi. Thanks for saying hi, Jess. All right, 31 00:01:25,040 --> 00:01:26,400 Speaker 1: I'd about it tomorrow. For those of you who a 32 00:01:26,440 --> 00:01:27,600 Speaker 1: knew to the pod, this is where we have a 33 00:01:27,600 --> 00:01:29,240 Speaker 1: look at the week that was, talk about what worked 34 00:01:29,280 --> 00:01:31,000 Speaker 1: and what didn't and how it can be better parents. 35 00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:33,560 Speaker 1: It's about intentionality and mindfulness in our parentings so that 36 00:01:33,600 --> 00:01:36,680 Speaker 1: we can I don't know, raise happy, resilient kids. That's 37 00:01:36,760 --> 00:01:39,679 Speaker 1: the goal. So I guess we're going to have to 38 00:01:39,680 --> 00:01:40,880 Speaker 1: share this one. 39 00:01:41,240 --> 00:01:43,040 Speaker 2: Well, I've got the piece of paper to prove it's 40 00:01:43,040 --> 00:01:43,680 Speaker 2: my story. 41 00:01:44,080 --> 00:01:46,920 Speaker 1: Yeah, the piece of paper was given to me that 42 00:01:47,040 --> 00:01:50,920 Speaker 1: you didn't read. It's not that I didn't read it. 43 00:01:50,920 --> 00:01:53,880 Speaker 1: It was about timing. It was timing. So here's the deal. 44 00:01:54,320 --> 00:01:56,560 Speaker 1: On what day was it? Monday? I think it was Monday. 45 00:01:56,560 --> 00:01:58,440 Speaker 1: You had to go down to Brizzy because we're homeschooling 46 00:01:58,440 --> 00:02:00,560 Speaker 1: our youngest two. You took them with you. One of 47 00:02:00,600 --> 00:02:02,600 Speaker 1: them decided to stay Grandma's for a couple of days. 48 00:02:02,880 --> 00:02:04,760 Speaker 1: But our ten year old Emily got to hang out 49 00:02:04,800 --> 00:02:07,240 Speaker 1: with one of her besties in our old neighborhood. While 50 00:02:07,280 --> 00:02:10,720 Speaker 1: she was there, they played roadblocks. I think did they 51 00:02:10,760 --> 00:02:14,800 Speaker 1: play roadblocks? No, they talked about roadblocks. They talked about 52 00:02:14,919 --> 00:02:19,120 Speaker 1: roadblocks and no stop. And that night, I don't know, 53 00:02:19,160 --> 00:02:21,840 Speaker 1: you'd gone for a walk with Abby, our second eldest, 54 00:02:21,880 --> 00:02:24,560 Speaker 1: along the beach and Emily came into the office right 55 00:02:24,600 --> 00:02:28,280 Speaker 1: before I was about to run a webinar for Cherrybrook 56 00:02:28,360 --> 00:02:32,239 Speaker 1: Technology High School parents. And right at the start of 57 00:02:32,280 --> 00:02:34,720 Speaker 1: the webinar, just before we pressed go, she walked in 58 00:02:34,760 --> 00:02:37,560 Speaker 1: and said, Dad, I need to talk to you. Have 59 00:02:37,639 --> 00:02:39,640 Speaker 1: to talk to you, And I said, not a great time. 60 00:02:40,080 --> 00:02:42,239 Speaker 1: She handed me a piece of paper. When it comes 61 00:02:42,240 --> 00:02:44,160 Speaker 1: to homeschool, the one thing you can't get Emily to 62 00:02:44,200 --> 00:02:46,560 Speaker 1: do is write. She just hates holding the pencil of 63 00:02:46,560 --> 00:02:51,240 Speaker 1: the pan, hates writing anything, winges, complains, wines, moans, and 64 00:02:51,240 --> 00:02:54,000 Speaker 1: we'll do anything to get out of writing. Except that 65 00:02:54,080 --> 00:02:56,920 Speaker 1: on Monday night she had me this list with fourteen 66 00:02:57,880 --> 00:03:03,960 Speaker 1: perfectly the best handwriting have done fourteen beautifully written statements 67 00:03:04,080 --> 00:03:10,920 Speaker 1: about why she should have roadblocks and all this week. 68 00:03:11,400 --> 00:03:14,480 Speaker 1: I mean, we've had tantrums, she's run away from the house. 69 00:03:15,720 --> 00:03:20,880 Speaker 1: It's been the roadblocks. Wars have begun. That's my story. 70 00:03:21,080 --> 00:03:23,280 Speaker 1: That's that's my old butt. It's tomorrow. 71 00:03:23,919 --> 00:03:25,080 Speaker 2: How are you going to be better? 72 00:03:27,360 --> 00:03:30,520 Speaker 1: Actually, my very simple take home message is that if 73 00:03:30,600 --> 00:03:33,160 Speaker 1: she had come to us with a list outlining or 74 00:03:33,240 --> 00:03:35,119 Speaker 1: let's say our fifteen or a sixteen year old, let's 75 00:03:35,160 --> 00:03:37,560 Speaker 1: our sixteen year old Annie, who sorry, she's seventeen now, 76 00:03:37,560 --> 00:03:39,440 Speaker 1: she's got a piece a couple of weeks ago. If 77 00:03:39,480 --> 00:03:40,960 Speaker 1: she'd come to us with a list when she was 78 00:03:41,000 --> 00:03:44,040 Speaker 1: sixteen and nine months and said, Dad, I can drive. 79 00:03:44,400 --> 00:03:47,119 Speaker 1: I've done my hours, I've demonstrated confidence in the car. 80 00:03:47,440 --> 00:03:49,560 Speaker 1: Here's my list of fourteen reasons why I should just 81 00:03:49,600 --> 00:03:51,320 Speaker 1: be allowed to drive to school on my own. Now, 82 00:03:51,880 --> 00:03:53,920 Speaker 1: it'd be a great list, but as the parent, I'd 83 00:03:53,960 --> 00:03:57,200 Speaker 1: say no. In this case, it is actually illegal for 84 00:03:57,240 --> 00:03:59,760 Speaker 1: you to do that. But outside of that, as a parent, 85 00:04:00,200 --> 00:04:02,080 Speaker 1: going to say no, why because sometimes his parents just 86 00:04:02,080 --> 00:04:04,560 Speaker 1: got to say no. Because you're interested in protecting your kids, 87 00:04:04,600 --> 00:04:07,200 Speaker 1: keeping them safe. That's our job. And when it comes 88 00:04:07,240 --> 00:04:12,440 Speaker 1: to issues of kids being online. I'm sorry, but I 89 00:04:12,480 --> 00:04:14,560 Speaker 1: know that I know that Emily's the only kid on 90 00:04:14,600 --> 00:04:17,000 Speaker 1: the planet who's not on roadblocks. I mean, she's given 91 00:04:17,080 --> 00:04:20,000 Speaker 1: us the list of every single one of her friends 92 00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:23,600 Speaker 1: who is on roadblocks, and it's a comprehensive list. And 93 00:04:23,640 --> 00:04:26,400 Speaker 1: she's also promised us and assured us that she'll only 94 00:04:26,440 --> 00:04:29,359 Speaker 1: play in public. She'll play with sound off. She's not 95 00:04:29,360 --> 00:04:32,039 Speaker 1: going to friend anybody that she doesn't know. She's aware 96 00:04:32,080 --> 00:04:32,200 Speaker 1: of it. 97 00:04:32,400 --> 00:04:33,680 Speaker 2: She watched parental guidance. 98 00:04:33,720 --> 00:04:36,520 Speaker 1: She was pro she's aware of the risks, dangers and 99 00:04:36,600 --> 00:04:39,719 Speaker 1: concerns that we have. But as a parent, sometimes you 100 00:04:39,760 --> 00:04:42,840 Speaker 1: just say no. And she's ten and I said no, 101 00:04:43,120 --> 00:04:45,320 Speaker 1: and so I'm the worst out in the world. She 102 00:04:45,360 --> 00:04:47,200 Speaker 1: knows that I still love her. We've had cuddles and 103 00:04:47,200 --> 00:04:49,160 Speaker 1: we've had good talks, but I'm the worst out in 104 00:04:49,200 --> 00:04:52,000 Speaker 1: the world, and my older better tomorrow is I'm okay 105 00:04:52,040 --> 00:04:54,600 Speaker 1: with that for now. I mean, it's really sad. Conversations 106 00:04:54,600 --> 00:04:59,760 Speaker 1: are ongoing, negotiations have not yet ceased, but I'm feeling 107 00:04:59,760 --> 00:05:01,520 Speaker 1: the lit a bit worn down by it, to be honest, 108 00:05:01,640 --> 00:05:04,719 Speaker 1: because this is the thing. When parents don't band together, 109 00:05:04,760 --> 00:05:07,360 Speaker 1: when parents don't form community. See what I'm doing here. 110 00:05:07,360 --> 00:05:09,520 Speaker 1: I'm blaming every parent that's listening to this podcast right now. 111 00:05:09,680 --> 00:05:12,400 Speaker 1: Let's their kids beyond roadblocks because I'm struggling with it 112 00:05:12,440 --> 00:05:14,000 Speaker 1: and I don't want her to be on there. It's 113 00:05:14,200 --> 00:05:17,960 Speaker 1: just I mentioned this the other day in a podcast. 114 00:05:18,320 --> 00:05:24,400 Speaker 1: It is literally, by design, a place where people with 115 00:05:24,600 --> 00:05:29,360 Speaker 1: ill intent, adults with ill intent can access and communicate 116 00:05:29,480 --> 00:05:35,120 Speaker 1: with a huge number of children at scale. That's what happens. 117 00:05:35,800 --> 00:05:40,960 Speaker 1: And is it likely that our child will be approached? 118 00:05:41,600 --> 00:05:44,200 Speaker 1: I don't know, but I don't want to take that risk. 119 00:05:44,320 --> 00:05:46,440 Speaker 1: To me, it's too big of a risk. Anyway, that's 120 00:05:46,440 --> 00:05:47,960 Speaker 1: my older tomorrow. I don't know if that was a 121 00:05:47,960 --> 00:05:49,880 Speaker 1: fun one or an inspiring one, or if I just 122 00:05:49,920 --> 00:05:59,240 Speaker 1: sound like a big grump kylie, what's your old tomorrow? 123 00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:01,680 Speaker 2: Well, let me read you the list. 124 00:06:02,360 --> 00:06:04,120 Speaker 1: Never done one like this before. By the way, I'm 125 00:06:04,160 --> 00:06:07,560 Speaker 1: usually upbeat. I'm really inspired. I'm trying to help everyone 126 00:06:07,560 --> 00:06:10,479 Speaker 1: feel like, yeah, you can do this. Let's say the. 127 00:06:10,520 --> 00:06:14,320 Speaker 2: List Number one, I'll only play Brookhaven with Patrick and 128 00:06:14,320 --> 00:06:18,040 Speaker 2: my street friends Jessic, Sasha, Ali Harper and Olivia and 129 00:06:18,120 --> 00:06:20,680 Speaker 2: some other friends. There's a few in there. There are 130 00:06:20,839 --> 00:06:23,680 Speaker 2: number two some games don't even give the talking ability. 131 00:06:23,880 --> 00:06:26,320 Speaker 2: Number three. I'm not going to tell someone my whole 132 00:06:26,360 --> 00:06:28,599 Speaker 2: life story so that they can kidnap me or say 133 00:06:28,640 --> 00:06:32,440 Speaker 2: mean things. Number four. If they say inappropriate things, then 134 00:06:32,440 --> 00:06:35,200 Speaker 2: I will tell you, and I can contact roeblocks and 135 00:06:35,240 --> 00:06:38,880 Speaker 2: they will be banned forever. Number five. I will ban 136 00:06:39,080 --> 00:06:42,160 Speaker 2: everyone who I don't know from my house. Number six. 137 00:06:42,320 --> 00:06:44,720 Speaker 2: No one has the same usernames, so I will memorize 138 00:06:44,720 --> 00:06:49,640 Speaker 2: all my friends' usernames. Number seven. They have smooth and 139 00:06:49,760 --> 00:06:50,680 Speaker 2: amazing graphics. 140 00:06:50,760 --> 00:06:53,840 Speaker 1: I love this, smooth and amazing graphics. I've got to 141 00:06:53,880 --> 00:06:54,359 Speaker 1: be allowed. 142 00:06:55,240 --> 00:06:58,400 Speaker 2: Number eight. I can make my own characters looks and 143 00:06:58,520 --> 00:07:01,800 Speaker 2: save them, and I can make more. Number nine. There 144 00:07:01,839 --> 00:07:05,400 Speaker 2: are no inappropriate clothing options, and you can change your 145 00:07:05,440 --> 00:07:09,120 Speaker 2: face and have children and even pets. Number ten. I 146 00:07:09,160 --> 00:07:13,640 Speaker 2: won't spend your actual money on roadblocks. Number eleven, it's 147 00:07:13,680 --> 00:07:18,040 Speaker 2: like living my dream future. And house twelve it'll be 148 00:07:18,120 --> 00:07:22,040 Speaker 2: perfect for long car drives. Thirteen. Anyone can watch me play, 149 00:07:22,080 --> 00:07:27,160 Speaker 2: so nothing bad happens. And fourteen everyone has it all right. 150 00:07:27,200 --> 00:07:29,320 Speaker 1: Well, I've got my own list. Are you ready for this? 151 00:07:28,960 --> 00:07:31,400 Speaker 1: This is something that I'm taking from Hindenburg Research. I 152 00:07:31,520 --> 00:07:34,160 Speaker 1: talked about them on the podcast recently. Hindenburg Research is 153 00:07:35,040 --> 00:07:38,520 Speaker 1: a stock market analyst company, and they basically point to 154 00:07:38,640 --> 00:07:40,400 Speaker 1: companies that are going to be in trouble soon and 155 00:07:40,440 --> 00:07:42,040 Speaker 1: they're holding that Roadblocks will be. 156 00:07:42,080 --> 00:07:45,280 Speaker 2: That you've got ninety seconds. You're not hijacking this anymore. 157 00:07:45,360 --> 00:07:49,320 Speaker 1: Hindenburg Research dot com slash Roadblocks Beyond inflated key user metrics, 158 00:07:49,640 --> 00:07:52,760 Speaker 1: Hindenburg's in game research revealed an x rated pedophile healthscape 159 00:07:52,800 --> 00:07:56,240 Speaker 1: exposing children of grooming, pornography, violent content, extremely abusive speech. 160 00:07:56,640 --> 00:07:59,840 Speaker 1: Number two. Roadblocks is compromising child safety and order report 161 00:08:00,160 --> 00:08:03,000 Speaker 1: to investigators per their interview with a former senior product 162 00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:05,640 Speaker 1: designer who said, and I quote, if you're limiting users engagement, 163 00:08:05,720 --> 00:08:07,640 Speaker 1: it's hurting your metrics in a lot of cases, the 164 00:08:07,680 --> 00:08:10,560 Speaker 1: leadership doesn't want that. Number three. For the second quarter 165 00:08:10,600 --> 00:08:13,120 Speaker 1: of twenty twenty four and a push towards profitability, Roadblocks 166 00:08:13,120 --> 00:08:15,920 Speaker 1: reported a two percent year over year decline and its 167 00:08:15,960 --> 00:08:19,080 Speaker 1: trust and safety expenses. Number four. Court of the problem 168 00:08:19,120 --> 00:08:22,520 Speaker 1: is that Roadblocks's social media features allow pedophiles to efficiently 169 00:08:22,560 --> 00:08:25,040 Speaker 1: target hundreds of children with no upfront screening to prevent 170 00:08:25,120 --> 00:08:28,320 Speaker 1: them from joining the platform. Number five. For example, in 171 00:08:28,320 --> 00:08:30,960 Speaker 1: twenty eighteen. Prior to Roadblocks going public, a twenty nine 172 00:08:31,040 --> 00:08:32,559 Speaker 1: year old was caught by police with one hundred and 173 00:08:32,600 --> 00:08:34,800 Speaker 1: seventy five hours of video footage of Hymn grooming and 174 00:08:34,840 --> 00:08:37,800 Speaker 1: engaging in explicit behavior with one hundred and fifty miners 175 00:08:37,880 --> 00:08:42,520 Speaker 1: using online platforms, namely Roadblocks. Number six. Media and nonprofit 176 00:08:42,640 --> 00:08:45,160 Speaker 1: expose as from twenty twenty three to July twenty twenty 177 00:08:45,200 --> 00:08:49,800 Speaker 1: four revealed digital strip clubs, red light districts, sex parties, 178 00:08:49,840 --> 00:08:53,240 Speaker 1: and child predators looking on Roadblocks. The National Center on 179 00:08:53,280 --> 00:08:56,959 Speaker 1: Sexual Exploitation in twenty twenty four labeled Roadblocks quote a 180 00:08:57,080 --> 00:09:01,000 Speaker 1: tool for sexual predators, a threat for children safety close 181 00:09:01,120 --> 00:09:04,839 Speaker 1: quote number seven. Numerous criminal indictments from twenty nineteen through 182 00:09:04,880 --> 00:09:07,920 Speaker 1: to twenty twenty four alleged that sexual predators groomed children 183 00:09:08,040 --> 00:09:11,960 Speaker 1: in game, ranging from eight to fourteen year olds, then kidnapped, raped, 184 00:09:12,080 --> 00:09:16,439 Speaker 1: or traded sexual content with them. Next one, following years 185 00:09:16,440 --> 00:09:19,120 Speaker 1: of scandals, Hindenburg performed their own checks to see if 186 00:09:19,120 --> 00:09:21,079 Speaker 1: the platform had cleaned up its act. As a test, 187 00:09:21,320 --> 00:09:23,079 Speaker 1: they attempted to set up an account under the name 188 00:09:23,160 --> 00:09:27,320 Speaker 1: Jeffrey Epstein, only to see the name was taken along 189 00:09:27,360 --> 00:09:31,600 Speaker 1: with nine hundred plus variations Let's go again. Many were 190 00:09:31,679 --> 00:09:36,360 Speaker 1: Jeffrey Epstein fan accounts, including jeff Epstein's Supporter, which had 191 00:09:36,400 --> 00:09:40,000 Speaker 1: earned multiple badges for spending time in kids games. Other 192 00:09:40,200 --> 00:09:44,680 Speaker 1: jeff Epstein accounts had the user name I Groom Minors 193 00:09:45,240 --> 00:09:47,000 Speaker 1: and I'm not even gonna say the other one because 194 00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:50,120 Speaker 1: it's so offensive. It makes me want to weep. And 195 00:09:50,160 --> 00:09:52,840 Speaker 1: I can just keep on going and going and going. 196 00:09:53,040 --> 00:09:56,439 Speaker 1: We'll link to it. Hindenburg Research dot Com slash roadblocks. 197 00:09:56,880 --> 00:10:00,520 Speaker 1: I'm getting passionate about it. You want and gave me 198 00:10:00,559 --> 00:10:03,720 Speaker 1: ninety seconds, but I could keep on going. Have a 199 00:10:03,720 --> 00:10:07,480 Speaker 1: listen to this one. In the game beat Up the Pregnant, 200 00:10:07,760 --> 00:10:12,320 Speaker 1: users hated pregnant women to death in a Walmart parking 201 00:10:12,360 --> 00:10:14,440 Speaker 1: lot with machetes, or killed them with frying pans or 202 00:10:14,440 --> 00:10:17,319 Speaker 1: a selection of guns. What about this one? We played 203 00:10:17,559 --> 00:10:21,200 Speaker 1: guns Work at Hospital, say the Hindenburg team, where users 204 00:10:21,320 --> 00:10:25,040 Speaker 1: can go on a hospital shooting rampage. The game has 205 00:10:25,320 --> 00:10:28,160 Speaker 1: more than one point six million visits and remains on 206 00:10:28,200 --> 00:10:32,240 Speaker 1: the platform with no age restrictions. The game's thumb nail 207 00:10:32,720 --> 00:10:36,600 Speaker 1: is a picture of a terrified pregnant woman. Parents have 208 00:10:36,720 --> 00:10:39,640 Speaker 1: no idea how bad this thing is, and that's why 209 00:10:39,679 --> 00:10:41,120 Speaker 1: their kids are on there. Now. I know that there's 210 00:10:41,120 --> 00:10:43,319 Speaker 1: all sorts of restrictions, I know there's all sorts of 211 00:10:43,400 --> 00:10:45,440 Speaker 1: ways that you can keep your kids safe, and I 212 00:10:45,480 --> 00:10:48,719 Speaker 1: know that forty million plus kids are on there every 213 00:10:48,760 --> 00:10:51,560 Speaker 1: single day. I don't care. I'm not letting my daughter 214 00:10:51,600 --> 00:10:51,920 Speaker 1: on there. 215 00:10:52,360 --> 00:10:54,319 Speaker 2: Well, thanks for that comprehensive Liz. 216 00:10:54,120 --> 00:10:58,760 Speaker 1: You're welcome. I'll do better tomorrow. Mate, how are you 217 00:10:58,800 --> 00:10:59,240 Speaker 1: going to be odd? 218 00:10:59,720 --> 00:11:01,200 Speaker 2: Don't even though where to go from. 219 00:11:01,400 --> 00:11:02,839 Speaker 1: Well, you wanted to talk about the list, and you 220 00:11:02,880 --> 00:11:05,040 Speaker 1: want to talk about the emotions, and you're right. I 221 00:11:05,080 --> 00:11:09,240 Speaker 1: have hijackted and I love hijacked because I'm so frustrated 222 00:11:09,280 --> 00:11:11,000 Speaker 1: with the fact that this product is out there and 223 00:11:11,040 --> 00:11:13,719 Speaker 1: it is mass marketed to our kids, and parents are 224 00:11:14,040 --> 00:11:16,040 Speaker 1: blase and apathetic and say, no, we're fine. 225 00:11:16,480 --> 00:11:20,240 Speaker 2: So the challenge is it's easy to assume, based on 226 00:11:20,280 --> 00:11:22,040 Speaker 2: the fact that Emily has brought me this big, long 227 00:11:22,080 --> 00:11:24,560 Speaker 2: list of all the reasons why she should be able 228 00:11:24,559 --> 00:11:27,200 Speaker 2: to play roadblocks, that this is about a video game, 229 00:11:28,440 --> 00:11:33,520 Speaker 2: but it's actually not. And that is the challenge as parents. 230 00:11:33,600 --> 00:11:38,040 Speaker 2: Our children give us stimulus on any given day, and 231 00:11:38,360 --> 00:11:43,680 Speaker 2: we either accept it for what it appears to be, 232 00:11:44,240 --> 00:11:49,439 Speaker 2: or we take the time to explore, explain, and empower 233 00:11:49,600 --> 00:11:52,480 Speaker 2: our kids as we recognize what the core root is. 234 00:11:53,080 --> 00:11:55,400 Speaker 2: So I sat down with Emily after she had run 235 00:11:55,440 --> 00:11:59,360 Speaker 2: away from home for half an hour or so. She 236 00:11:59,480 --> 00:12:01,200 Speaker 2: came back and I said, we need to have a 237 00:12:01,200 --> 00:12:03,040 Speaker 2: little cuddle, and she came and lay on the bed 238 00:12:03,080 --> 00:12:06,040 Speaker 2: with me and we started to talk about her list, 239 00:12:06,240 --> 00:12:08,720 Speaker 2: but she got really really upset and didn't want to 240 00:12:08,760 --> 00:12:11,360 Speaker 2: and she turned her back to me and I just said, Emily, 241 00:12:11,800 --> 00:12:14,960 Speaker 2: I said, is this really about roadblocks? Or is this 242 00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:19,000 Speaker 2: about the fact that you miss your friends? And she 243 00:12:19,080 --> 00:12:24,600 Speaker 2: pretty much burst into tears. There are so many awesome 244 00:12:24,640 --> 00:12:28,680 Speaker 2: things about homeschooling, and she recognizes it and loves it, 245 00:12:29,520 --> 00:12:32,199 Speaker 2: but there are also some really big challenges. She doesn't 246 00:12:32,320 --> 00:12:34,839 Speaker 2: like being the new kid in the room. She doesn't 247 00:12:35,320 --> 00:12:40,240 Speaker 2: want to invest in meeting new friends if they're not 248 00:12:40,280 --> 00:12:43,000 Speaker 2: going to be lifelong friends. There's some really big challenges 249 00:12:43,040 --> 00:12:46,920 Speaker 2: for her around this, and so starting to infiltrate new 250 00:12:47,720 --> 00:12:50,840 Speaker 2: homeschool groups and things is a really, really big deal 251 00:12:50,880 --> 00:12:53,160 Speaker 2: for her. And so we haven't spent a lot of 252 00:12:53,200 --> 00:12:56,240 Speaker 2: time looking in that space. She spent a lot of 253 00:12:56,280 --> 00:12:58,640 Speaker 2: time on her own and she's been really happy doing it, 254 00:12:59,160 --> 00:13:02,440 Speaker 2: but as time has gone on, there is this a 255 00:13:02,520 --> 00:13:07,040 Speaker 2: deep hole, the big gape in her life where she 256 00:13:07,320 --> 00:13:10,080 Speaker 2: wants her friends, but she's the only one who's not 257 00:13:10,120 --> 00:13:13,880 Speaker 2: at school, and it's really really hard to sit there 258 00:13:14,440 --> 00:13:17,400 Speaker 2: and navigate that space when there's so many other challenges 259 00:13:17,480 --> 00:13:20,400 Speaker 2: going on. So this started off about roadblocks, but it's 260 00:13:20,440 --> 00:13:23,359 Speaker 2: actually not about roadblocks. This is about a little girl 261 00:13:23,920 --> 00:13:27,880 Speaker 2: who is desperate for connection. And I think the power 262 00:13:27,920 --> 00:13:30,280 Speaker 2: comes when we can sit in those hard places with 263 00:13:30,360 --> 00:13:35,360 Speaker 2: our kids and have hard conversations and help them to 264 00:13:35,520 --> 00:13:40,160 Speaker 2: understand why they're so passionate about whatever it is that 265 00:13:40,440 --> 00:13:43,599 Speaker 2: they're talking about. She thought that this was about roadblocks, 266 00:13:44,200 --> 00:13:47,280 Speaker 2: but as we explored it together, there was a recognition 267 00:13:47,320 --> 00:13:49,520 Speaker 2: that this is actually not really about roadblocks. 268 00:13:49,960 --> 00:13:53,079 Speaker 1: Yeah, for the record, I just love everything that you've said, 269 00:13:53,559 --> 00:13:57,920 Speaker 1: and I also know it's not about roadblocks, but roadblocks 270 00:13:57,960 --> 00:14:00,680 Speaker 1: it's just such a big problem. I want to read 271 00:14:00,679 --> 00:14:02,360 Speaker 1: more stats to you. That's how fast fred I am. 272 00:14:02,880 --> 00:14:05,760 Speaker 1: But ultimately my older better tomorrow to come out of 273 00:14:05,760 --> 00:14:08,040 Speaker 1: that is the answer will be know for her because 274 00:14:08,080 --> 00:14:11,200 Speaker 1: of that and more, and because roadblocks won't solve the 275 00:14:11,240 --> 00:14:12,200 Speaker 1: problem you know. 276 00:14:12,400 --> 00:14:14,120 Speaker 2: One of the things she said to me, she said, 277 00:14:14,360 --> 00:14:16,280 Speaker 2: I just want to be normal, And I said, what 278 00:14:16,360 --> 00:14:18,760 Speaker 2: does what does that mean? She said, well, I just 279 00:14:18,840 --> 00:14:22,120 Speaker 2: want parents who actually don't care what I watch and. 280 00:14:22,000 --> 00:14:22,880 Speaker 1: What I play. 281 00:14:23,120 --> 00:14:26,080 Speaker 2: Because that's in her mind, that's what she's seeing. She 282 00:14:26,240 --> 00:14:28,360 Speaker 2: just thinks that her friends are allowed to do whatever 283 00:14:28,360 --> 00:14:30,760 Speaker 2: they want when they want, which is not the case. 284 00:14:30,560 --> 00:14:32,440 Speaker 1: No, of course not, but from her are saying that 285 00:14:32,480 --> 00:14:33,360 Speaker 1: their parents don't care. 286 00:14:33,480 --> 00:14:36,520 Speaker 2: No, but from her perspective, that's what she sees, because 287 00:14:36,800 --> 00:14:39,480 Speaker 2: we're putting limitations on her that her other friends don't have. 288 00:14:40,600 --> 00:14:41,320 Speaker 2: Just to be normal. 289 00:14:41,840 --> 00:14:44,200 Speaker 1: I'll do better tomorrow understanding your kids. By the way, 290 00:14:44,200 --> 00:14:46,400 Speaker 1: that conversation led to some of the best hugs, and 291 00:14:47,200 --> 00:14:48,920 Speaker 1: it was beautiful lay on the bed with our little 292 00:14:48,920 --> 00:14:51,040 Speaker 1: ten year old and just listen to her and have 293 00:14:51,080 --> 00:14:53,920 Speaker 1: her pour her heart out to us. It was a highlight, 294 00:14:54,000 --> 00:14:56,960 Speaker 1: a highlight of the week. Just before we wrap up, 295 00:14:57,600 --> 00:15:01,760 Speaker 1: if you've got autistic kids, our cour for Parenting Autism 296 00:15:01,960 --> 00:15:05,640 Speaker 1: is on sale until Monday. Early bird closes on Monday 297 00:15:05,640 --> 00:15:07,320 Speaker 1: at the end of the weekend. If you'd like to 298 00:15:07,400 --> 00:15:10,920 Speaker 1: join us for what is just a life changing, game 299 00:15:11,040 --> 00:15:14,240 Speaker 1: changing course about parenting autism. Visit happy families dot com 300 00:15:14,280 --> 00:15:17,000 Speaker 1: dot IU. The Happy Families podcast is produced by Justin 301 00:15:17,040 --> 00:15:19,200 Speaker 1: Rowland from Bridge Media. I hope you have a great weekend. 302 00:15:19,320 --> 00:15:23,720 Speaker 1: We'll be back with you on Monday.