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Speaker 1: It's their Happy Family's podcast. It's the podcast for.

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Speaker 2: The time poor parent.

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Speaker 1: They just once answers mew.

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Speaker 3: Parents are increasingly telling me that their children are disregulated.

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Speaker 1: So today a conversation about what it means to be.

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Speaker 3: Regulated or disregulated emotionally. Hello, I'm doctor Justin Cole, someone

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Speaker 3: who with my wife and mum to our six sometimes

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Speaker 3: regulated and sometimes not so regulated, slightly disregulated children, missus

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Speaker 3: Happy families Kylie lots to talk about with emotions today.

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Speaker 2: Well, why do we start with emotions? What are they?

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Speaker 3: Emotions are data, emotions are information, and sometimes we use

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Speaker 3: that data really well. Other times though, either the data

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Speaker 3: is faulty or our response to the data is faulty,

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Speaker 3: and we take it to some kind of eternal truth

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Speaker 3: and we live and die by those emotions. And sometimes

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Speaker 3: that's functional, other times it's not. Sometimes it's quite maladaptive.

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Speaker 3: But ultimately we see emotions as the way things really are,

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Speaker 3: which is problematic because when we become more and more emotional,

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Speaker 3: we see things more and more myopically, and that leads to, well,

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Speaker 3: it leads to looking at the world through some very

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Speaker 3: emotional glasses that don't always reflect the reality that's in

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Speaker 3: front of us. The etymology of the word emotion. I

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Speaker 3: love this, the etymology that is where the word comes

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Speaker 3: from from French emos mvoir, which means to excite, but

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Speaker 3: like traditionally it was Latin which meant and I don't

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Speaker 3: speak Latin, but muver e e m o v e r,

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Speaker 3: which basically means to move. So emotions literally are to move.

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Speaker 3: So there's this psychological movement. And I really love that

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Speaker 3: Latin root of the word emotion, because when we feel emotional,

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Speaker 3: we feel moved, if you know what I mean. I

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Speaker 3: guess the one other thing that I would say in

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Speaker 3: answering your question what is it to be emotional? Some

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Speaker 3: researchers look at emotion on two dimensions. They look at

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Speaker 3: the pleasantness dimension and also the energetic dimension. So you

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Speaker 3: can have high high pleasant emotions and low pleasant emotions

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Speaker 3: or unpleasant emotions, and you can have high energy and

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Speaker 3: low energy emotions. And you can put that into a

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Speaker 3: little two by two with energy and emotion as the

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Speaker 3: X and Y axis, and all of a sudden you've

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Speaker 3: got this really cool way of grouping emotions. So if

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Speaker 3: I was to say to you, what's a highly pleasant,

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Speaker 3: highly energetic emotion, you would say excitement, absolutely. And if

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Speaker 3: I was to say, what's a highly unpleasant, highly energetic emotion, anger, great, okay, livid,

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Speaker 3: being hostile, just blowing up, explosiveness. Conversely, we could look

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Speaker 3: at low energy, low pleasantness sadness, yeah okay, And we

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Speaker 3: can also have low energy but high pleasantness peace. Oh nice. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: I like that one. I was thinking of a bliss,

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Speaker 3: but either I'll take either of them. They're the kind

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Speaker 3: of once you get into your thirties, forties, fifties, they're

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Speaker 3: the ones.

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Speaker 1: That you really like energy highly pleasant kids.

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Speaker 3: On the other hand, they really like the high energy

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Speaker 3: I want to see all the time.

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Speaker 1: It doesn't matter if it's highly unpleasant or highly pleasant.

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Speaker 3: Just as long as it's high energy, they're happy. So

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Speaker 3: that's that's kind of what emotions are. I guess would

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Speaker 3: be my definition of them. I guess one other thing

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Speaker 3: to highlight is that every emotion serves a purpose, so

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Speaker 3: we don't have good emotions and bad emotions. A lot

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Speaker 3: of people will say, oh, that's just a bad emotion.

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Speaker 3: I just I'm really uncomfortable with that language.

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Speaker 2: It's not okay to be angry.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, But context is everything because sometimes an emotion is

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Speaker 3: out of place, it doesn't belong where it is, so

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Speaker 3: it might be really maladaptive. Will give you a really

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Speaker 3: simple example, the kids being hyper excited right before bet.

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Speaker 3: It's just not the right time to have that emotion.

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Speaker 3: It's still a healthy emotion, but it's not adaptive, it's

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Speaker 3: not functional. There's a time and a place. And one

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Speaker 3: of the challenges that we have with emotional expression and

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Speaker 3: emotional regulation, and this regulation is helping kids to be social.

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Speaker 3: I mean, ultimate emotions are about being socialized. Sometimes people

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Speaker 3: are like, you shouldn't have to suppress your emotions. But

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Speaker 3: when we had a trip to the Gold Coast a

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Speaker 3: few months ago, Kylie, I don't know if you were

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Speaker 3: with me, as I was walking through will Worth picking

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Speaker 3: up some groceries.

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Speaker 1: I think you were with the kids.

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Speaker 3: But there was a lady in Ale six who was

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Speaker 3: being her authentic self. She was not suppressing her emotions

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Speaker 3: at all. She was letting the entire supermarket know exactly

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Speaker 3: how she felt.

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Speaker 1: And it was not appropriate.

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Speaker 3: Like it was everyone got out of Aisle six.

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Speaker 1: No one wanted to be near her.

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Speaker 3: It was dysfunctional, it was disregulated, it was maladaptive, and

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Speaker 3: it obviously came at a cost.

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Speaker 2: So you're using these words dysregulation and regulated emotion. What

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Speaker 2: is it exactly? What does it mean to be regulated?

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Speaker 3: Okay, yeah, I'm glad you want to know about regulation first,

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Speaker 3: because that's the goal. That's what we're really working towards

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Speaker 3: with our children. Emotional regulation is the ability to control

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Speaker 3: your emotional state in service of your goals. I want

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Speaker 3: to say that again because it matters a lot, not

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Speaker 3: just about controlling your emotions, because sometimes you want to

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Speaker 3: control them and suppress them, and other times you need

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Speaker 3: to express them. But what we really want to consider

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Speaker 3: is what am I working towards here in terms of

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Speaker 3: the quality of the relationship that I have with the

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Speaker 3: person I'm engaging with or with myself? What am I

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Speaker 3: working towards in terms of work or getting the house

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Speaker 3: organized or getting kids.

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Speaker 1: Into the car?

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Speaker 3: How is my emotional expression going to serve me and

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Speaker 3: getting to my goals? Do I need to suppress or

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Speaker 3: do I need to express and in what way? So,

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Speaker 3: emotion regulation is controlling your emotions in such a way

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Speaker 3: that you can use them healthily and adaptively in service

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Speaker 3: of your goals.

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Speaker 2: I'm curious about the concept of controlling your emotional state

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Speaker 2: in service of your goals. You've said that, right, So

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Speaker 2: I had a situation where somebody decided they needed to

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Speaker 2: speak their truth.

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Speaker 3: Oh sorry, tangent, speak their truth. What that means is

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Speaker 3: I'm going to say something that you're not going to like.

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Speaker 3: It's got nothing to do with truth. It means I'm

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Speaker 3: feeling emotional about something, and my choice is to not

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Speaker 3: suppress that in service of my goal to have a healthy,

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Speaker 3: happy relationship, but rather to express my opinion my emotion

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Speaker 3: because I think I'll feel better once I've got it out.

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Speaker 2: And that's exactly what it was.

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Speaker 3: And it's a real lack of emotional intelligence because nobody

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Speaker 3: I cannot think of a single time anyone has expressed

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Speaker 3: their truth to me, expressed my truth, like Capital T

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Speaker 3: truth or Little Tea truth anyway, I've never gone, Oh

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Speaker 3: I really needed that truth, Thank you so much. Like

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Speaker 3: I feel so much better as a person about myself

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Speaker 3: right now, come on, like, just we've got to stop

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Speaker 3: saying stuff like that, seriously, anyway, go on.

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Speaker 2: But that's my point. She wanted to speak her truth,

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Speaker 2: and the service of her goal is honesty.

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Speaker 1: Ah, okay, okay.

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Speaker 2: Right, So her goal is I'm an honest person, and

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Speaker 2: in order for me to be able to move forward,

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Speaker 2: I actually need to be honest with you about this situation.

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Speaker 2: But the reality is, whether I knew the truth or not,

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Speaker 2: in that situation, it had nothing to do with me

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Speaker 2: and everything to do with her.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: So how does that play out when we're as adults,

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Speaker 2: we're trying to be emotionally regulated.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, so maybe another definition that's often used when it

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Speaker 3: comes to the idea of emotional regulation is simply the

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Speaker 3: ability to control your emotional state. Now I add the

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Speaker 3: in service of your goal's element, because I trust that

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Speaker 3: most people are working towards having civil and social and positive, energizing,

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Speaker 3: life giving interactions with the people around them, and that

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Speaker 3: they want to do well.

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Speaker 2: Gus, it is generous, generous of you.

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Speaker 3: I'm a capacious kind of guy. But some people are

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Speaker 3: the opposite. Some people are capricious and their goals even

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Speaker 3: there though, a person who is not thinking about the

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Speaker 3: long term, they may feel that if they just share

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Speaker 3: their quote unquote truth, if I just share my truth,

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Speaker 3: it's going to make everything better. The goal is still

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Speaker 3: to make things better, it's just that the goal is

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Speaker 3: misguided it's misaligned and therefore it's not going to it's

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Speaker 3: not going to be successful.

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Speaker 2: If that's what emotional regulation is, what is dysregulation and

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Speaker 2: what does it look like? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: So disregulation is when your emotion.

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Speaker 3: Is fair idea, when you're not controlling your emotional state.

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Speaker 3: I mean, that's kind of it, but I want to

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Speaker 3: go a bit deeper on it because the more I've

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Speaker 3: thought about this idea of dysregulation, and I don't know

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Speaker 3: if you'll find this in a textbook so much, but

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Speaker 3: the way I look at it is it's when your

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Speaker 3: emotions are stronger than your ability to act with autonomy. Yes,

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Speaker 3: And the keyword there for me is.

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Speaker 1: And that's why I've added it.

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Speaker 3: You don't find that in the textbooks, but the ability

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Speaker 3: to act with autonomy around your emotions. When you are disregulated,

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Speaker 3: you've stopped choosing.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I love that. And one of our daughters

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Speaker 2: would actually say to me when she would get to

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Speaker 2: a point where her emotions were so big, and we

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Speaker 2: kind of looked at it like Jack Wull and heigh.

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Speaker 2: She was so calm and controlled most of the time,

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Speaker 2: and then she would just have this massive explosion. And

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Speaker 2: after she'd had the explosion. Then she had all of

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Speaker 2: the guild associated with it because it was so not

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Speaker 2: who she was, and she would say to me, I

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Speaker 2: just don't have any control in that moment. It would

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Speaker 2: overpower her. So I love how you've articulated that because

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Speaker 2: I've seen it and I've obviously lived it in my

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Speaker 2: own life.

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Speaker 1: You know what I mean.

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Speaker 3: Sometimes I'm just such indity. Right, I'm a parenting expert.

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Speaker 3: I've got a PhD in psychology. I'm supposed to know

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Speaker 3: all this and get it right. But last week on Friday,

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Speaker 3: we were talking about how we had this trip. It

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Speaker 3: was overseas and on the way home we ended up

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Speaker 3: getting stuck. We had three transfers to do anyway right,

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Speaker 3: but then the airline diverted from Brisbane because of fog

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Speaker 3: and we had to go into Sydney and then into

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Speaker 3: Canberra before we could finally get back to Brisbane. It

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Speaker 3: meant that we spent approximately forty two hours in transit

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Speaker 3: and I only got about three hours sleep. So I

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Speaker 3: don't sleep on planes now. My ability to choose my emotions.

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Speaker 3: By the time we got to Thursday night or Friday

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Speaker 3: night or whatever it was, I was an absolute mess.

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Speaker 3: I was a disaster, and I actually got explosive. And

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Speaker 3: that's what a disregulated brain does. It moves into fight

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Speaker 3: or flight. It becomes completely dysfunctional. Response is completely disproportionate

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Speaker 3: to the context or to.

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Speaker 1: The goals that we have.

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Speaker 3: I wanted to have good relationships with my family, but

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Speaker 3: something happened and I just blew up. And what I

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Speaker 3: blew up, Well, I was so emotionally disregulated because I

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Speaker 3: was so physically disregulated.

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Speaker 1: It was just the worst.

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Speaker 3: So disregulated brains tend to be explosive or withdrawn right

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Speaker 3: go into the bedroom and hide and not talking to anybody,

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Speaker 3: which probably brings us to parenting and us and our

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Speaker 3: kids and big emotions.

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Speaker 2: You started the podcast saying that more and more parents

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Speaker 2: are saying that their kids are struggling with emotional dysregulation.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, And a lot of parents that I talked to

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Speaker 3: about this are blaming it on resilience. They're saying, Oh,

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Speaker 3: if my kids were more resilient, then they wouldn't be

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Speaker 3: so emotional, and you're.

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Speaker 2: Obviously suggesting that that's not the case.

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Speaker 1: Well, sometimes they're right.

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Speaker 3: Sometimes it is a resilience issue, and in some way,

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Speaker 3: it's just the ability to exert that control comes down

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Speaker 3: to how we're able to control our environment and be resilient.

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Speaker 3: But I think often this is a misdiagnosis.

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Speaker 2: I'm thinking about when our kids have been the most disregulated,

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Speaker 2: and more times than not, it's when they're young.

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Speaker 3: Right, Yeah, Absolutely, emotion regulation develops across time. It starts

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Speaker 3: at around about the age three, like two year olds.

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Speaker 3: Anyone who's ever had a two year old knows they

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Speaker 3: struggle so much to regulate their emotions. Once they get

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Speaker 3: going or once something doesn't work out their way, just kaboom.

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Speaker 3: They don't have the capacity to regulate.

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Speaker 2: So they actually need us to be the calm influence

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Speaker 2: so that they can kind of borrow that calm.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, they catch out predictability safety exactly, they catch our calm.

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Speaker 1: What age do you reckon?

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Speaker 3: That developmental process starts to get to a point where

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Speaker 3: kids can, in most situations regulate their emotions.

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Speaker 2: I was going to say, does it ever happened?

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Speaker 3: Okay, so I mean, obviously I'm nearly fifty years old,

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Speaker 3: and it happened to me last week because I was

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Speaker 3: tired and jet lagged or whatever else.

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Speaker 2: But look, I would say anywhere between, depending on the child,

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Speaker 2: But between eight and ten, okay, is where you'd start

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Speaker 2: to see some good control.

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Speaker 3: When I'm talking to school teachers and I asked this question,

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Speaker 3: they all kind of go, yeah, the first couple of

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Speaker 3: years of school are really hard, but by around grade

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Speaker 3: two or grade three they get it together. And most

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Speaker 3: research points to somewhere around the age of nine. But

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Speaker 3: there's a whole lot of other stuff going on, Right,

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Speaker 3: They're supposed to get better at regulation as they get older,

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Speaker 3: but they'll still have plenty of struggles, just like adults.

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Speaker 3: And you can probably think of a few reasons why.

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Speaker 2: We've go tired, hungry, stress, still, lonely, bored.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah, And then there's medical conditions or just

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Speaker 3: being jet lagged, or maybe they've got ADHD or there's

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Speaker 3: some other kind of neurodiversity going on. And what happens

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Speaker 3: is kids, when they get dysregulated, they ENTI file flight mode.

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Speaker 3: They struggle to cope, they do not listen to reason.

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Speaker 3: Because I've said this for years, high emotions intelligence, Right,

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Speaker 3: we're in a different part of the brain.

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Speaker 1: Now. When children experience acute stress.

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Speaker 3: They usually are just really really highly reactive, just like

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Speaker 3: your I as an adult. No pause, not considering anything logical,

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Speaker 3: not considering long term goals. Why disregulated, So you end

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Speaker 3: up with biting and the kicking and the swearing and

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Speaker 3: the spitting and the crying and the clenching fists and

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Speaker 3: the slamming of the doors. That's classic fight mode.

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Speaker 2: So, you know, I've never actually thought about it. But

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Speaker 2: toddlers obviously are a perfect case study of this. But

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Speaker 2: I've never thought of it as fight mode. But when

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Speaker 2: they get really worked up, they do.

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Speaker 3: They just want to fight, right, That's exactly what it is.

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Speaker 1: What's really going on is the front lobe shuts down.

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Speaker 3: That's the part of the brain that does the thinking,

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Speaker 3: the planning course with the toddle that don't even really

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Speaker 3: have a frontal.

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Speaker 1: Lobe, it's barely there.

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Speaker 3: The amygdala that triggers survival mode, and so canborm.

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Speaker 1: It all happens.

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Speaker 3: The brain's alarm system sends out a false alarm, triggers

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Speaker 3: survival instinct, and then it's fight or flight, and kids

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Speaker 3: just don't access the higher cognitive function like reasoning and

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Speaker 3: decision making. It just doesn't happen. So as parents, we've

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Speaker 3: got some really big challenges when it comes to children,

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Speaker 3: and they're disregulated emotions, but so much of it is

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Speaker 3: developmentally appropriate, and our job is to help them through

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Speaker 3: those years from three to nine to slowly, very slowly

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Speaker 3: develop the emotional regulation they need.

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Speaker 2: But big emotions, they're normal and healthy. It's really important

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Speaker 2: for us to be able to express our emotions.

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Speaker 3: We are first and foremost emotional beings. Now that's not

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Speaker 3: necessarily in our best interest, but first and foremost we're

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Speaker 3: emotional beings, and then we are rational beings.

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Speaker 1: Second.

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Speaker 3: I love it's quote from Brenne Brown. She says, when

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Speaker 3: something difficult happens, emotion is at the wheel. Cognition and

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Speaker 3: behavior are bound and gagged in the trunk, and emotion

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Speaker 3: is driving. And that's kind of what's going on. I mean,

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Speaker 3: it's such a really I love the metaphor. When we

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Speaker 3: spoke with Lisa de Moore on the Happy Families podcast

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Speaker 3: a little while ago, in the episode that we shared

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Speaker 3: with her, she said two.

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Speaker 1: Brilliant things about emotions.

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Speaker 3: Number One, sometimes our kids and sometimes us as well,

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Speaker 3: become regulated by expressing emotions in a disregulated way. So

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Speaker 3: we've got to work through the disregulation. And I remember

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Speaker 3: when we had young kids, Kylie, every now and again

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Speaker 3: you would just say, this baby will not go to sleep,

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Speaker 3: and it pained both of us, but you would sometimes

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Speaker 3: just put the baby in the cot for five or

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Speaker 3: ten minutes and they would scream their lungs out, and

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Speaker 3: we'd sit there going, oh, my goodness, what are we doing.

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Speaker 3: But once they'd had a big scream, we'd pick them up.

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Speaker 3: They felt safe and secure, they'd have a feed, and

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Speaker 3: they would go to sleep perfectly. Now we're not recommending

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Speaker 3: that you do that every night or anything like that,

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Speaker 3: but from time to time you would say, sometimes they

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Speaker 3: just need to scream. And that's that wholely said to

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Speaker 3: more thing. Sometimes when you disregulated, you just have to

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Speaker 3: be disregulated to work through the disregulation.

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Speaker 1: And pull it back together.

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Speaker 3: And the second thing she said is that, and this

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Speaker 3: is picking up on the whole Brene Brown idea. Emotions

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Speaker 3: should have a seed at the table of your cognitive

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Speaker 3: board of directors. But they don't chair the board. That's

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Speaker 3: our job to make sure that they're not chairing the board.

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Speaker 2: Recently, you were having some Spanish lessons.

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Speaker 3: Ah see, see.

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Speaker 2: You came across you wanted to say.

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Speaker 3: I'm hungry, yes, yes, And.

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Speaker 2: When you looked at the translation, it wasn't I am hungry,

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Speaker 2: it was I have hunger.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, And the difference between associating the emotion with who

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Speaker 2: you are and the acknowledgment that what you have is

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Speaker 2: an emotion is a really important differentiation. Yes.

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Speaker 3: So instead of saying I am hungry in Spanish, they

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Speaker 3: would say tengo hungry, and tengo means I have So

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Speaker 3: if I was to say no, tengo pisos, I'd be

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Speaker 3: saying I don't have any pesos. So I would say,

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Speaker 3: tengo hungry. I'm hungry, but it's not actually I'm hungry,

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Speaker 3: it's I have hunger. In other words, I don't I

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Speaker 3: am not this emotion. I'm not angry or I'm not sad.

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Speaker 3: I have sadness. And I love that because it means

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Speaker 3: that it comes and it goes. It's not always with us.

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Speaker 3: And that idea of tengo hungri, I just I think

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Speaker 3: it's beautiful. Anyway, we need to wrap up, so let's

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Speaker 3: share just a couple of quick ideas about what we

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Speaker 3: can do if we want the kids to regulate well.

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Speaker 3: First thing, recognize the developmental realities. If they're age between

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Speaker 3: three and nine, the younger they are, the harder it

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Speaker 3: is for them to do the emotional work of regulating

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Speaker 3: their emotions. They're going to spend more time disregulated when

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Speaker 3: things aren't working out. Number two, be regulated yourself.

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Speaker 1: You're laughing.

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Speaker 3: I don't know if you're laughing at me or laughing

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Speaker 3: at you, but you're thinking about last week when I

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Speaker 3: lost it.

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Speaker 2: Oh, I'm laughing about it all because the reality is

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Speaker 2: probably the hardest thing we do as parents when our

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Speaker 2: children's emotions are massive is actually being self regulated.

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Speaker 3: Right, Because emotions are contagious.

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Speaker 2: So you make it sound like it's just a really

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Speaker 2: easy checkpoint.

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Speaker 1: We just need to be Just regulate yourself. You'll be fine.

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Speaker 3: Okay, their kids, they're going to lose it. Your job

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Speaker 3: is to go you're a kid, you're losing it. I

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Speaker 3: get it.

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Speaker 1: It's not a problem. That's the job, right.

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Speaker 3: Number three, The more that you can create a predictable

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Speaker 3: and safe environment, the better it is for your kids.

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Speaker 3: If the environment is unpredictable and unsafe, your why your

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Speaker 3: kids for stress, which means that they're highly reactive. They

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Speaker 3: spend more time just regulated. Now, that doesn't mean that

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Speaker 3: we need to make the environment completely safe all the time.

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Speaker 3: Research shows that kids do need to have some unpredictability,

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Speaker 3: and they especially need to do stuff that's risky. It

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Speaker 3: helps them to manage their emotions really well when they're

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Speaker 3: involved in risky play, really healthy for them.

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Speaker 2: But I think that it's different. It's about being emotionally safe.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, well, yeah, yeah, it is.

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Speaker 2: So One thing that I've really really noticed since we've

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Speaker 2: brought Emily home from school and she's now homeschooling, is

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Speaker 2: that she's so much karma. She is so much calmer

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Speaker 2: and the reality is I'm not doing things perfectly by any.

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Speaker 3: Stress and feels so much more safe and predictable for her.

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Speaker 2: She feels so much more connected to me, but calmer

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Speaker 2: because there's predictability in the emotions within our space.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: We expect so little of our kids physically in twenty

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Speaker 3: twenty four and so much of our kids emotionally, and

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Speaker 3: we've got it the wrong way around. We should expect

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Speaker 3: a little less of them emotionally because they're kids and

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Speaker 3: they're still regular learning how to regulate, and we should

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Speaker 3: be letting them go and do so much more physically,

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Speaker 3: like get outside and take risks and have fun and

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Speaker 3: climb trees and ride skateboards and go to the park

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Speaker 3: on your own because you eight like, go and do that.

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Speaker 1: Now.

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Speaker 3: I know context is everything, So please don't have a

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Speaker 3: heart attack if you live in a place where you

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Speaker 3: couldn't let you right year old do that.

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Speaker 1: But we can let it anyway. I digress.

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Speaker 3: Last thing, hold the line. We need to be We

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Speaker 3: need to really be compassionate, but we've got to hold

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Speaker 3: the line, have boundaries, but be really kind to our kids.

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Speaker 3: And if we can do those things, then they're going

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Speaker 3: to get better and better at emotional regulation. Over time,

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Speaker 3: they'll be less disregulated. And most parents are going to

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Speaker 3: be saying to me, my kids are so disregulated, what

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Speaker 3: do I do? I think you've left something off the list,

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Speaker 3: pot if I've forgotten.

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Speaker 2: Well it's not. It is actually on the list.

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Speaker 1: Okay.

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Speaker 2: But you talk about us needing to be regulated ourselves,

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Speaker 2: it has so much to do with how we model

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Speaker 2: what it looks like to be emotionally regulated to allow

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Speaker 2: them to see us with our big emotions working through it.

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Speaker 2: They don't need us to be happy and cheerful all

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Speaker 2: the time. That doesn't help them at all. They actually

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Speaker 2: need to see us working through some really big emotions.

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Speaker 3: Because in a regulated way where we're taking autonomy and

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Speaker 3: control and looking after ourselves.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, they need to see that because they need to

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Speaker 2: know number one, it's okay to have those emotions, and

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Speaker 2: number two, there is a better way to get through

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Speaker 2: it than kicking and screaming.

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Speaker 3: I hope this has been a helpful conversation. The Happy

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Speaker 3: Families Podcast is produced by Justin Rulan from Bridge Media.

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Speaker 3: If you'd like more information about making your family happy,

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Speaker 3: we'd love for you to reach out to us happy

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Speaker 3: families dot com dot You just go to the website,

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Speaker 3: click on the podcast Link's a message asking us your

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Speaker 3: questions that we will do our best to answer on

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Speaker 3: the pod tomorrow. Doing exactly about answering your questions on

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Speaker 3: the Happy Families Podcast