1 00:00:00,960 --> 00:00:05,640 Speaker 1: What makes a great question, Well, it depends on what 2 00:00:05,680 --> 00:00:09,080 Speaker 1: you're trying to figure out. Are you interviewing someone for 3 00:00:09,119 --> 00:00:12,319 Speaker 1: a job, are you asking someone on a date, or 4 00:00:12,360 --> 00:00:13,760 Speaker 1: are you trying to learn something? 5 00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:18,320 Speaker 2: Whatever it is, you probably have an answer or a 6 00:00:18,320 --> 00:00:21,439 Speaker 2: solution or a direction in mind when you ask a question, 7 00:00:22,360 --> 00:00:25,520 Speaker 2: and that's fine, but it's not always the path to 8 00:00:25,600 --> 00:00:29,040 Speaker 2: the best outcome. Zoe Chance is. 9 00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:32,640 Speaker 1: The author of Influence Is Your Superpower and a professor 10 00:00:32,720 --> 00:00:35,720 Speaker 1: at the Yale School of Management, and one of the 11 00:00:35,720 --> 00:00:39,919 Speaker 1: most popular influencing strategies Zoe teachers to her students is. 12 00:00:39,960 --> 00:00:41,760 Speaker 2: Called the magic question. 13 00:00:42,920 --> 00:00:46,600 Speaker 1: So what is the magic question? And how can it 14 00:00:46,640 --> 00:00:50,240 Speaker 1: become your superpower for being a better influencer. 15 00:00:55,160 --> 00:00:56,840 Speaker 2: My name is doctor amanthe Immer. 16 00:00:57,200 --> 00:01:00,320 Speaker 1: I'm an organizational psychologist and the founder of Behave Real 17 00:01:00,360 --> 00:01:04,520 Speaker 1: Science Consultancy Inventium, and this is how I work a 18 00:01:04,600 --> 00:01:07,400 Speaker 1: show about how to help you do your best work. 19 00:01:08,400 --> 00:01:11,200 Speaker 1: On today's My Favorite Tip episode, we go back to 20 00:01:11,240 --> 00:01:13,200 Speaker 1: an interview from the past and I pick out my 21 00:01:13,360 --> 00:01:16,560 Speaker 1: favorite tip from the interview. In today's show, I speak 22 00:01:16,600 --> 00:01:19,320 Speaker 1: with Zoe Chance about the magic question? 23 00:01:20,160 --> 00:01:22,120 Speaker 3: Can I metha? Can I just share a story that 24 00:01:22,160 --> 00:01:24,720 Speaker 3: will take a couple of minutes. Of course, yes, the 25 00:01:24,760 --> 00:01:27,240 Speaker 3: magic question sinks in a little better with a story 26 00:01:27,360 --> 00:01:30,959 Speaker 3: and from an influenced perspective. We can remember things better 27 00:01:31,440 --> 00:01:35,520 Speaker 3: when we have something concrete to visualize, So this will 28 00:01:35,520 --> 00:01:38,560 Speaker 3: help listeners remember the magic question. And this is a 29 00:01:38,640 --> 00:01:42,960 Speaker 3: story that an American feminist named Gloria Steinem told when 30 00:01:43,000 --> 00:01:45,320 Speaker 3: she came to my hometown of New Haven, Connecticut a 31 00:01:45,360 --> 00:01:48,240 Speaker 3: little while ago. She was and she told it for 32 00:01:48,280 --> 00:01:52,000 Speaker 3: a different reason, but it illustrates very well. She was 33 00:01:52,040 --> 00:01:55,720 Speaker 3: working on the problem of sex trafficking. She was speaking, 34 00:01:55,760 --> 00:01:59,360 Speaker 3: she was writing, she was traveling the world, and she 35 00:01:59,400 --> 00:02:03,520 Speaker 3: had gone to a sex trafficking conference in Zambia. After 36 00:02:03,600 --> 00:02:07,000 Speaker 3: the conference, she goes to visit some women in a 37 00:02:07,120 --> 00:02:09,399 Speaker 3: village that's in the middle of nowhere, near a big 38 00:02:09,400 --> 00:02:12,520 Speaker 3: game preserve. And three of the young women from that 39 00:02:12,600 --> 00:02:16,440 Speaker 3: village had been lost to sex trafficking the previous year. 40 00:02:17,240 --> 00:02:19,920 Speaker 3: And Gloria Steinem is sitting down with this group of 41 00:02:19,960 --> 00:02:23,200 Speaker 3: women on a tarp in the middle of a barren field, 42 00:02:23,720 --> 00:02:28,280 Speaker 3: and she asks them the magic question. She says, what 43 00:02:28,320 --> 00:02:32,440 Speaker 3: would it take or what would it have taken for 44 00:02:32,560 --> 00:02:36,000 Speaker 3: those three young women not to have left the village? 45 00:02:36,040 --> 00:02:39,480 Speaker 3: In that way, and they told her an electric fence, 46 00:02:40,680 --> 00:02:45,520 Speaker 3: an electric fence. They said, when the corn reaches a 47 00:02:45,520 --> 00:02:48,160 Speaker 3: certain height, the elephants come and they eat it and 48 00:02:48,200 --> 00:02:50,960 Speaker 3: they trample it, and we have nothing to eat, We 49 00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:52,680 Speaker 3: have nothing to sell at the market. We don't have 50 00:02:52,720 --> 00:02:56,200 Speaker 3: any money to send our kids to school. So these 51 00:02:56,240 --> 00:03:01,800 Speaker 3: young women and their families were desperate. Glorias Steinem says, listen, 52 00:03:02,520 --> 00:03:05,120 Speaker 3: if I send you the money, will you clear the 53 00:03:05,160 --> 00:03:07,920 Speaker 3: field and build the fence. These women say yes. So 54 00:03:07,919 --> 00:03:10,359 Speaker 3: Gloria s Dynham goes back home, she raises a few 55 00:03:10,400 --> 00:03:13,480 Speaker 3: thousand dollars. She sends the money to these women in 56 00:03:13,520 --> 00:03:16,200 Speaker 3: the village, and the way she tells it, she comes 57 00:03:16,240 --> 00:03:19,240 Speaker 3: back a few years later and they have a bumper 58 00:03:19,280 --> 00:03:21,880 Speaker 3: crop of corn, and since they put up the fence, 59 00:03:22,600 --> 00:03:26,160 Speaker 3: no young women have been lost to sex trafficking from 60 00:03:26,200 --> 00:03:29,760 Speaker 3: that village. It also happens that the women in that 61 00:03:29,880 --> 00:03:33,920 Speaker 3: village had ended up collaborating with the women in the 62 00:03:33,960 --> 00:03:37,320 Speaker 3: village next door, and they have now created and as 63 00:03:37,360 --> 00:03:39,800 Speaker 3: far as I know, it's still going on. There's a 64 00:03:40,000 --> 00:03:43,520 Speaker 3: chicken collective and a tailoring operation and their group is 65 00:03:43,560 --> 00:03:46,840 Speaker 3: called Waka Simba. It means strong women So the magic 66 00:03:46,920 --> 00:03:51,520 Speaker 3: question is just what would it take? And it's magic 67 00:03:52,520 --> 00:03:56,040 Speaker 3: for multiple reasons. First of all, it's respectful, and so 68 00:03:56,160 --> 00:03:59,160 Speaker 3: that means it's comfortable on the other side and comfortable 69 00:03:59,200 --> 00:04:02,840 Speaker 3: for you too. You are acknowledging that you're not the 70 00:04:02,920 --> 00:04:07,040 Speaker 3: expert here. They're the expert on their situation and their obstacles. 71 00:04:07,760 --> 00:04:13,280 Speaker 3: It second is magic because it often gives you a 72 00:04:13,560 --> 00:04:16,960 Speaker 3: roadmap to success that's actually so much easier than you 73 00:04:17,000 --> 00:04:19,680 Speaker 3: would have expected, or maybe than you would have even 74 00:04:19,720 --> 00:04:25,640 Speaker 3: been willing to do. And third, it's magic because if 75 00:04:25,760 --> 00:04:30,200 Speaker 3: that person or those people in this case have told 76 00:04:30,200 --> 00:04:33,960 Speaker 3: you what it will take, then they have implicitly committed 77 00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:37,640 Speaker 3: to supporting that outcome. And the way that I interpret 78 00:04:37,680 --> 00:04:42,200 Speaker 3: this story, it's not that the electric fence magically prevented 79 00:04:42,200 --> 00:04:45,839 Speaker 3: sex trafficking, but the women who had said this is 80 00:04:45,839 --> 00:04:49,000 Speaker 3: what it would take would make sure that none of 81 00:04:49,040 --> 00:04:53,520 Speaker 3: their friends, neighbors daughters, neighbor's daughters are going to be 82 00:04:53,640 --> 00:04:57,080 Speaker 3: sex trafficked now they have the fence. So the magic 83 00:04:57,160 --> 00:05:01,640 Speaker 3: question you can work with almost any situation and any person, 84 00:05:01,839 --> 00:05:03,719 Speaker 3: even if you've used it before, even if you've talked 85 00:05:03,760 --> 00:05:06,359 Speaker 3: them the magic question, and then the laugh at you like, 86 00:05:06,960 --> 00:05:09,840 Speaker 3: you know. I'll use it with my daughter. She'll use 87 00:05:09,880 --> 00:05:11,720 Speaker 3: it with me and I'll be like, oh, ripley the 88 00:05:11,720 --> 00:05:14,640 Speaker 3: magic question again and she's like, I know. But then 89 00:05:14,880 --> 00:05:15,960 Speaker 3: they give you an answer. 90 00:05:19,040 --> 00:05:21,440 Speaker 1: I hope you're feeling a bit inspired to use the 91 00:05:21,520 --> 00:05:24,800 Speaker 1: magic question in your life this week. I know that 92 00:05:24,920 --> 00:05:28,680 Speaker 1: since interviewing Zoe many months ago now, I've used it 93 00:05:28,760 --> 00:05:31,039 Speaker 1: quite a bit in my own life, and I must 94 00:05:31,040 --> 00:05:33,320 Speaker 1: say I find it particularly useful with my eight year 95 00:05:33,360 --> 00:05:36,440 Speaker 1: old daughter when she really doesn't want to do something, 96 00:05:37,000 --> 00:05:40,560 Speaker 1: because with the magic question, what would it take? We 97 00:05:40,640 --> 00:05:44,880 Speaker 1: can often find a way through. If you're looking for 98 00:05:44,960 --> 00:05:47,800 Speaker 1: more tips to improve the way that you work, I 99 00:05:47,839 --> 00:05:51,440 Speaker 1: write a short fortnightly newsletter that contains three cool things 100 00:05:51,480 --> 00:05:54,679 Speaker 1: that I've discovered that helped me work better, ranging from 101 00:05:55,000 --> 00:05:58,960 Speaker 1: software and gadgets that I'm loving through the interesting research findings. 102 00:05:59,279 --> 00:06:01,919 Speaker 1: You can sign up for that at Howiwork dot co. 103 00:06:02,440 --> 00:06:06,159 Speaker 1: That's how I Work dot co. How I Work is 104 00:06:06,200 --> 00:06:10,039 Speaker 1: produced by Inventium with production support from Dead Set Studios, 105 00:06:10,279 --> 00:06:12,520 Speaker 1: and thank you to match Nimba, who does the audio 106 00:06:12,600 --> 00:06:15,599 Speaker 1: mix for every episode and makes everything sound so much 107 00:06:15,600 --> 00:06:17,159 Speaker 1: better than it would have otherwise. 108 00:06:17,800 --> 00:06:18,599 Speaker 2: See you next time.