Speaker 1: Life Uncut podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout
Speaker 1: Australia and their connections to land.
Speaker 2: Sea and community.
Speaker 1: We pay our respect to their elders past and present
Speaker 1: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait
Speaker 1: islander peoples today.
Speaker 3: This episode is recorded on Gaddigal Land of the Aurora Nation.
Speaker 2: Hi guys and I.
Speaker 3: Welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut. I'm Laura
Speaker 3: and I'm not pretty. I'm producing a feeling interbriate. You
Speaker 3: really jumped in there quick.
Speaker 2: Didn't you see that You're about to say something?
Speaker 3: I was like, And Brittany's not here, but don't worry,
Speaker 3: Producer Geisha is here to the rescue. No britt Look,
Speaker 3: she's got a few things happening at the moment. She's
Speaker 3: we're not currently able to record and so we are
Speaker 3: very very lucky to have the fabulous, wonderful, beautiful producer
Speaker 3: Keisha sitting in to talk to you all today about
Speaker 3: Tommy Lee's dick.
Speaker 4: Can't wait to talk about Tommy Lee's pain. And also
Speaker 4: I realized this morning that you and I we've worked
Speaker 4: together for like a year and a half now this
Speaker 4: is our first like one on one, this is our
Speaker 4: first time recording together, just the two of us.
Speaker 3: Also, I don't know why when you said that before
Speaker 3: you were like, this feels really intimate, it's our first time.
Speaker 3: I was like, this has got weird connotations that I
Speaker 3: don't think you should be saying to your work colleague.
Speaker 3: And we don't have a HR here because we're still
Speaker 3: recording it. If we had an age, none of us
Speaker 3: would have jobs.
Speaker 5: No.
Speaker 2: But also speaking of.
Speaker 4: Which, I am wondering what is going on on your
Speaker 4: neck there, because Laura ben that, if I'm not.
Speaker 2: Mistaken, is a huge hickey.
Speaker 4: I know that you and Matthew Johnson went to a
Speaker 4: wedding on the weekend, so I'm starting I think that
Speaker 4: things was successful at the wedding and there was a
Speaker 4: celebration of love.
Speaker 3: As if this thirty six year old woman mother to
Speaker 3: two has a hicky on her neck. Please, the people
Speaker 3: have been listening to this podcast long enough.
Speaker 4: Okay, I'm gonna describe what is on Laura's net because
Speaker 4: obviously this is for all right, We'll check this on socials.
Speaker 4: About two centimeters quite a deep purple, almost looks like
Speaker 4: a kind of scratch like Master really got his teeth
Speaker 4: into It.
Speaker 3: Doesn't look as bad on video as what it does
Speaker 3: in real life. No, the only fun Actually that's a lie.
Speaker 3: We did have sex on the weekend.
Speaker 2: Congratulations, thank you, thank you everyone.
Speaker 3: I have a minutes in heaven. Yeah. It was slightly, No.
Speaker 2: It was. It was very drunk. It was after the wedding.
Speaker 2: It was wrong. Sex is fun if you're in a relationship, though, Yeah,
Speaker 2: it was. We want to get to the fun of
Speaker 2: the round.
Speaker 3: It was because I had said to Matt. I was like,
Speaker 3: let's go home and have sex, and he was like, no,
Speaker 3: I'm too drunk. And then I was like, let's do
Speaker 3: it anyway, and he was like, no way, it's not happening.
Speaker 3: He was like, wow, I really didn't expect that tonight.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's and now you're here being like it was
Speaker 2: all right, I mean it. He warned you sometimes when
Speaker 2: they've had a lot to drink, it's not as funny.
Speaker 2: Nobody was. No, No, it was exceptional. It was just unexpected.
Speaker 2: That should be better.
Speaker 3: Yes, it was great, but I would just like to
Speaker 3: go back to the hickey situation.
Speaker 2: It's not a hickey. It is a burn from a
Speaker 2: curling ond that's what this is.
Speaker 4: You know, I think that that's exactly what my friends
Speaker 4: and I all used to tell our mums when we
Speaker 4: were about seventeen as well. So it's a convenient little
Speaker 4: excuse there that. Oh no, I just I dropped my
Speaker 4: straight now on my neck by accident and all of
Speaker 4: a sudden purple.
Speaker 3: I'm sorry, Are you trying to downplay my third degree burn?
Speaker 3: Is this what's happening here? Let's just stop talking about
Speaker 3: my potential Kiki also my sex life, love life.
Speaker 2: We can we're.
Speaker 4: Getting that is the foundation that this entire podcast is
Speaker 4: built off of.
Speaker 3: That is true, but we have something far more exciting
Speaker 3: to talk about than my sex life.
Speaker 2: I don't know if there's anything that exists that is exciting?
Speaker 2: Pretty do you tell me?
Speaker 3: Missionary position that is seven minutes, thank you, producing, Keisha? Okay,
Speaker 3: that is, and we announced it on Instagram last week.
Speaker 3: We talked about it on last week's episode.
Speaker 2: But we're doing our live show. Actually it's Britty. She's
Speaker 2: going to be there produced.
Speaker 3: Keisha will think I'm going to be there too, right,
Speaker 3: you will definitely be there. I mean we haven't discussed
Speaker 3: will you be on stage? Will you be backstage.
Speaker 2: I don't mind, just as long as I can be
Speaker 2: a part of it. You're like, do I have to
Speaker 2: buy tickets? Do I have to buy a ticket. We're
Speaker 2: doing a live show, baby, we.
Speaker 3: Are doing our very first live show. It is on
Speaker 3: in Sydney. It's at the City Recital Hall. We are
Speaker 3: so sorry to everybody who is not in Sydney. We
Speaker 3: understand that that's monumentally annoying if you're not here and
Speaker 3: not able to come. But the reason why we're doing
Speaker 3: just one show to trial it, to test it out,
Speaker 3: is because maybe if it does well and we don't
Speaker 3: absolutely suck, we will roll it out next year.
Speaker 2: Just dip in the little tip of the toe and
Speaker 2: just put it in, just just the tip. There's a
Speaker 2: lot of sexual in New windows Que early on in
Speaker 2: this podcast, which I'm assuming is exactly what the live
Speaker 2: show is going to entail of as well.
Speaker 3: But we have at the moment completely sold out the
Speaker 3: bottom floor of the City Recital Hall. That's like eight
Speaker 3: hundred tickets already sold out. There's two more levels which
Speaker 3: there are seats still available, but not many. I think
Speaker 3: there's like only two hundred or maybe two hundred and
Speaker 3: fifty tickets left. So once they are sold out, which
Speaker 3: they absolutely will be this week, that'll be a sold
Speaker 3: out show and then you won't be had to buy
Speaker 3: a ticket. That's pretty exciting, Just like this little side note.
Speaker 3: That's pretty fucking cool. I was telling my family about
Speaker 3: it this week. I was like, yeah, like, we're going
Speaker 3: to do a live show, and they didn't quite understand
Speaker 3: what that was. They were like, oh, the live radio
Speaker 3: recording and I was like, no.
Speaker 2: I don't know. We do one of those every week.
Speaker 3: I was like, we're going to get up and stand
Speaker 3: in front of people and talk about stuff, you know,
Speaker 3: probably our sex life.
Speaker 4: One thy two hundred of them, and are we going
Speaker 4: to talk about for the other fifty three minutes?
Speaker 2: Matt's brother, So Matt's brother. His name's David. Also single.
Speaker 2: If anyone is looking for a very handsome man in
Speaker 2: rock Hampton, excuse me, you work with Brittany and I.
Speaker 2: How have you not ever mentioned this? It's true? Oh
Speaker 2: you know, don't shit where you eat?
Speaker 4: Oh you don't think we're up to the standard of
Speaker 4: the Johnson Fair.
Speaker 3: No no, no, no, he's hot though, Yeah, reckon, you guys,
Speaker 3: get a little interesting.
Speaker 2: A few single people coming to the wedding. Very nice.
Speaker 2: Tell Brittany to keep a pause off.
Speaker 3: What I was going to say is that when I
Speaker 3: explained to him what the live show was, he stood
Speaker 3: there and went, oh, that's fucking frightening, And I was like,
Speaker 3: I know, I'm well aware.
Speaker 2: So yeah.
Speaker 3: Look, you know some people say faked to you make it,
Speaker 3: but I'm all about authenticity. I'm so excited and I'm
Speaker 3: equally very scared. It's going to be amazing. Come buy tickets. Well,
Speaker 3: let's do this together. There'll be lots of audience involvement.
Speaker 3: We've got some amazing guests already lined up. We've got
Speaker 3: some very fun music happening. All that's very secretive, but
Speaker 3: please don't miss out on buying a ticket.
Speaker 2: Where can you buy tickets? You can buy tickets. Thank
Speaker 2: you so much for asking produce, because you know it's funny.
Speaker 4: As the producer of your entire podcast, you would think
Speaker 4: that I would know exactly what the answer to that was,
Speaker 4: and you would think that that question was a little
Speaker 4: rhetorical or maybe rehearsed.
Speaker 2: It's not. I actually do is it ticket tech?
Speaker 3: Like, I know you know you're coming, but you haven't
Speaker 3: even looked to see where you buy the tickets from.
Speaker 4: I didn't think I would need to purchase one, but
Speaker 4: if I were to, which maybe after this conversation, I
Speaker 4: will have to.
Speaker 2: Is it this wipe up on Instagram? Buy or BUYO
Speaker 2: life on cut Pop.
Speaker 3: You could go onto my website, which we do also have.
Speaker 3: This is news to you, isn't it.
Speaker 4: No, No, I do update the website every week, so
Speaker 4: I'm across the website, but I didn't know that we'd
Speaker 4: put the tickets on there.
Speaker 2: But it's good to find.
Speaker 3: Let us tell you what today's episode is about. Go
Speaker 3: buy tickets like put pause us now go do that?
Speaker 2: Come back.
Speaker 3: Today's episode we are interviewing Lane Beachley. Now Lane Beachley,
Speaker 3: if you haven't heard of who she is. She is
Speaker 3: one of the greatest surfing legends of all time, a
Speaker 3: seven time World surfing champion. But there is so much
Speaker 3: more than just being a surfing champion. Lane's childhood is
Speaker 3: something that played a hugely profound role and impact in
Speaker 3: her life and the reason why she had such a
Speaker 3: drive to be successful, and part of that is because
Speaker 3: she was adopted into the Beachley family.
Speaker 2: When she was born.
Speaker 3: Now we're going to get into the full story, but
Speaker 3: the reason why Lane was adopted into the Beachley family
Speaker 3: was because she was conceived through assault. And it is
Speaker 3: truly a story where I think you sit back and
Speaker 3: your question like, what would you do if you're in
Speaker 3: that situation?
Speaker 4: And also I think something even more interesting about Lane's
Speaker 4: stories that like, we look at surfing today and she
Speaker 4: was she came through earlier generation, a generation ago when
Speaker 4: women surfing in particular was not what it is today.
Speaker 2: It was completely.
Speaker 4: Underfunded, it was really undersupported, and she was kind of
Speaker 4: a pioneer of women's surfing. So her story of how
Speaker 4: she got to the success that she is, it's just
Speaker 4: it's phenomenal and I think she's an incredible woman. Also,
Speaker 4: her love life has been very interesting and quite spicy,
Speaker 4: and she is currently married to one of the members
Speaker 4: of the founding members of In Excess. His name is
Speaker 4: Kirk Pengilly. They got married eighteen years ago. Their love
Speaker 4: story is remarkable, and yeah, I think you're really going
Speaker 4: to enjoy this episode.
Speaker 3: But first, now, before we get into the deep and
Speaker 3: moving and quite beautiful part of the episode, let's talk
Speaker 3: about something that wasn't so moving but was extremely alarming
Speaker 3: Tommy Lee and the dick pic that he posted to
Speaker 3: Instagram on Thursday night, well, Thursday night our time, I
Speaker 3: think it was.
Speaker 2: Early in the morning in the States. So for anyone
Speaker 2: who is in a work can I just.
Speaker 3: Set this first. I did not see this on Instagram.
Speaker 3: I didn't get on there and see the unsolicited dig pic.
Speaker 3: I got sent it by producer Keisha, So not only
Speaker 3: did everyone else get it, was like.
Speaker 2: Forced upon me through other channels. Excuse me. It is
Speaker 2: my job to find content for.
Speaker 4: The podcast, Like I resent it to our podcast group
Speaker 4: and I was like, whoa, guys, this is wild.
Speaker 2: By the time I send it to you, it had
Speaker 2: already been up for two hours.
Speaker 3: No content, warning, no nothing, just a penis in my inbox.
Speaker 3: It's been a long time since I've just had a
Speaker 3: penis in my inbox.
Speaker 4: So for anyone who missed it, and frankly, I don't
Speaker 4: know how you did, because it was it was genuinely
Speaker 4: everywhere Thursday evening our time. Tommy Lee, who is the
Speaker 4: fifty nine year old American musician. He is a part
Speaker 4: of the Motley Crue band and he's really known for
Speaker 4: the sex tape that was made with his then wife
Speaker 4: Pamela Anderson. He posted a full frontal selfie in the
Speaker 4: nude if you.
Speaker 2: Haven't seen it.
Speaker 3: I had conflicting feelings about how we were going to
Speaker 3: navigate this part of the recording. I was like, do
Speaker 3: I encourage people to go on Google it? But I
Speaker 3: guess the thing is he willingly posted it, so like totally,
Speaker 3: he's like consenting for you all to go and see it.
Speaker 3: It's not like his it's not like his eyecloud got
Speaker 3: hacked and these photos have been put out there without
Speaker 3: his you know will, or without like against his will.
Speaker 4: And that's why he didn't have a problem screenshoining it
Speaker 4: and sending it totally. Because if this was like a
Speaker 4: leaked photo, I would feel very, very very conflicted about
Speaker 4: talking about it and about encouraging that kind of do
Speaker 4: you know what I mean? There's such a difference because
Speaker 4: he's the one who actually posted it.
Speaker 3: Well, I guess just on what you said, Like if
Speaker 3: it was ELITD photo, I honestly think that when it's
Speaker 3: a leaked photo, talking about it actually is more problematic
Speaker 3: than letting it go under the radar because it encourages
Speaker 3: more people to go and google what the fuck is
Speaker 3: that that they're talking about. Whereas in this instance it
Speaker 3: was willingly posted Go Google, it is still very much
Speaker 3: on the internet. You can see exactly what it is
Speaker 3: that we're talking about. But for anybody who doesn't want
Speaker 3: to see it in all its glory, I'll describe it
Speaker 3: to you a little bit.
Speaker 2: He's sitting on the side of the bath.
Speaker 3: He's taken a selfie which has no head, no and
Speaker 3: it is from just his torso his nipples, his completely
Speaker 3: well shaven penis well maintained, and his schlong because that's what.
Speaker 2: You'd have to call it. It's very big. It's just
Speaker 2: dangling into the bath like slong and away.
Speaker 3: And I let me tell you, I saw it and
Speaker 3: I didn't know how to feel, because I did at
Speaker 3: the start, I was like, Oh, that's pretty funny. And
Speaker 3: then as a mom, I was like, there are children
Speaker 3: on Instagram. Someone think of the children. And then I
Speaker 3: started to consider more of the conversation around what is
Speaker 3: censored on Instagram. First, what is okay to post? And
Speaker 3: now obviously this picture was absolutely not okay to post.
Speaker 3: But the thing and the question and the conversation that
Speaker 3: has arisen is the fact that it did stay online
Speaker 3: for six hours.
Speaker 2: Yes, Look, I think.
Speaker 4: There are a couple of different ways that you can
Speaker 4: look at this, and if I'm being completely transparent, the
Speaker 4: very first way that I looked at it was whoa,
Speaker 4: and I laughed because I thought it was pretty fucking wild.
Speaker 4: But I also kind of thought it was a bit funny.
Speaker 4: The photo was filtered, it.
Speaker 2: Was captioned oops.
Speaker 4: I was like, oh, honey, this is a really desperate
Speaker 4: way to remain relevant. But congrats to you, because you
Speaker 4: know what, it fucking worked, and what's in his bio
Speaker 4: is order my new album.
Speaker 2: The album came out in twenty twenty.
Speaker 4: And if that is a successful publicity stunt to get
Speaker 4: eyes on your page, you have succeeded Tommy Lee. Now
Speaker 4: this is not to say I am very aware of
Speaker 4: how problematic of a person.
Speaker 2: Tommy Lee is.
Speaker 4: I got some some stats about Like I already had
Speaker 4: this idea in my head. I was like, I know
Speaker 4: that he's a bit of a trouble person and has
Speaker 4: a pretty checkered background. But just to give a little
Speaker 4: bit of context, in nineteen ninety eight, he said six
Speaker 4: months in a county jail pleading no contest to kicking
Speaker 4: Pamela Anderson while she was holding their son Dylan.
Speaker 2: He's been in.
Speaker 4: Trouble for swastika tattoos, instigating riots, racist comments, and assault.
Speaker 2: Like this guy, he's not a moral citizen. He's not
Speaker 2: someone that I look up too.
Speaker 4: And I would even go to say that I don't
Speaker 4: even think many of the one point five million people
Speaker 4: who follow him on Instagram are following him because they
Speaker 4: think he's an inspirational person.
Speaker 3: Well, I guess the other part of this, like, look
Speaker 3: before we unpack the reasons why, obviously it's problematic and
Speaker 3: kind of the nuanced parts around this whole conversation, it
Speaker 3: is very obvious that Tommy Lee does not give a fuck,
Speaker 3: Like that is why he posted the photo. He doesn't
Speaker 3: care about Instagram's censorship. He doesn't care about what impact
Speaker 3: it has on you. He doesn't care whether you consented
Speaker 3: to a photo of his.
Speaker 2: Dick or not. He doesn't care.
Speaker 3: So us talking about like the why or the psyche
Speaker 3: behind what compelled him to post this is pretty irrelevant.
Speaker 3: But I do think the thing that was very interesting
Speaker 3: is and I'm part of this, so are you, Keisha,
Speaker 3: Like we saw that photo and our very first initial
Speaker 3: reaction was to laugh, right, and then we were like, okay,
Speaker 3: that's a bit uncool. Very recently, Britney Spears was also
Speaker 3: posting photos of herself where she was actively nude but
Speaker 3: covering her private parts with her hands. And my initial reaction,
Speaker 3: and I would go as far as to say, as
Speaker 3: most people's initial reaction wasn't that's fucking funny. It was
Speaker 3: maybe there's something wrong, Maybe she's going through something that.
Speaker 2: Is really interesting for me.
Speaker 4: When I saw those photos of Britney Spears, a big
Speaker 4: part of me, a big part of me at the
Speaker 4: time thought, I get this because you have been so
Speaker 4: controlled for so long, and right now this is a
Speaker 4: middle finger to the men, like this is a kind
Speaker 4: of like now I can do whatever I want.
Speaker 2: However, you are completely right. The amount of.
Speaker 4: Conversations about like, oh my god, she's not well, like
Speaker 4: she's costing, you know, she's not okay.
Speaker 3: And I think about this now and I think about
Speaker 3: my own bias to it, and I'm like, you know,
Speaker 3: and obviously the whole Free Britney movement is a very
Speaker 3: separate conversation. Everyone is like entirely stoked that she's not
Speaker 3: under conservativeship because that was royally fucked. But I think
Speaker 3: about my own bias and why was my bias? Like
Speaker 3: is she okay? Verse when a man does it? I thought,
Speaker 3: and I think a lot of other people thought that's funny.
Speaker 3: So why is male nudity funny? And female nudity is
Speaker 3: something else that needs to be unpacked in moreover, like psychologically,
Speaker 3: what's wrong with that person?
Speaker 2: Why would they do that?
Speaker 3: And I think it goes to show that there is
Speaker 3: just two very different sets of standards when it comes
Speaker 3: to the way that we perceive nudity. But it also
Speaker 3: comes back to that whole notion about why are women's
Speaker 3: nipples sensored but not men's when ours has a functional
Speaker 3: purpose and there's literally there for no reason at all.
Speaker 2: They have a bit of an evolutionary hangover.
Speaker 4: Well, And I mean, as we have said, there are
Speaker 4: multiple layers to this, and most of the outrage that
Speaker 4: I saw was about the fact that they saw a
Speaker 4: penis when they didn't want to, which is fair enough.
Speaker 3: Like I said, it's been a long time since I've
Speaker 3: been sent an unsolicited dig pic, like long time really? Well,
Speaker 3: I mean, no, I'm not single, you are. When's the
Speaker 3: last time you got one?
Speaker 2: Unsolicited. When was the last time you got one at all?
Speaker 4: The last time they got one was much more recently,
Speaker 4: but unsolicit. It's been a while since I got one
Speaker 4: unsolicited entirely. I think the other ones I received were encouraged.
Speaker 4: But look, I mean, on top of that, in terms
Speaker 4: of this gender conversation about what isn't isn't okay on Instagram,
Speaker 4: I actually personally have a friend who's a sex worker
Speaker 4: and she's had I think upwards of three accounts completely
Speaker 4: removed before because she was found to violate the nudity's
Speaker 4: standards and in none of the photos that were actually
Speaker 4: the reason that they were taking her accounts were taken down.
Speaker 2: Was she actually nude?
Speaker 3: So what was she showing in these photos to have
Speaker 3: the accounts taken down? Or was it more the conversation
Speaker 3: that was taking place.
Speaker 4: Look, I'm not sure, I'm not Instagram, but the photos
Speaker 4: were raunchy, but she was not nude, So it kind
Speaker 4: of go It starts to make me question, Okay, so
Speaker 4: what's the difference between her posting photos that are almost nudes.
Speaker 2: Super hot photos?
Speaker 4: She looked great and it's her business that she's a
Speaker 4: sex worker, so she was promoting her business as a
Speaker 4: lot of us still on Instagram, Right, what's the difference
Speaker 4: between that and Tommy Lee? And the only thing I
Speaker 4: could think of was, Tommy Lee has a blue tick,
Speaker 4: is a verified account?
Speaker 3: Yes, And this was the big cause of outrage, right,
Speaker 3: the fact that this dick pic stayed online for six hours.
Speaker 3: It was still on Instagram's platform six hours after it
Speaker 3: was posted. Now something that I haven't seen come up
Speaker 3: too much in conversation around this, because I know a
Speaker 3: lot of people are talking about this dickpic, but it
Speaker 3: has to do with verification.
Speaker 2: So some of you might remember.
Speaker 3: But back in twenty fourteen, Rihanna had her entire account
Speaker 3: removed because she posted a photo which was her top,
Speaker 3: like you could see parts of her nipple, and it
Speaker 3: was a cover photo that she had done for a
Speaker 3: French magazine called lou And she posted the cover photo
Speaker 3: and her account was taken down and suspended. Rihanna then
Speaker 3: completely boycotted the platform because she was like, fuck this,
Speaker 3: I don't want to be on Instagram where I'm having
Speaker 3: my images, which are editorial commercial images censored. Instagram turned
Speaker 3: around and in order to combat that, what they did
Speaker 3: is they created a system. So part of their algorithm
Speaker 3: is if you have a blue tick and people are
Speaker 3: reporting you, your content is not taken down anywhere near
Speaker 3: as quickly as somebody who's not verified. And the reason
Speaker 3: for that is because so many people who do have
Speaker 3: a blue tick have their content reported all the time,
Speaker 3: and so it's to stop these sort of trigger algorithms
Speaker 3: that would allow someone's account to be taken down.
Speaker 2: And that's kind of I mean, I'm.
Speaker 3: Not here defending Instagram because like that is not the
Speaker 3: hill that I want to die on. But my thought
Speaker 3: is is that's what's happened here. There has been something
Speaker 3: in the algorithm. Obviously, millions of people would have been
Speaker 3: reporting this image. I have no doubt that Instagram was
Speaker 3: copying a huge amount of reports for violation of the codes. However,
Speaker 3: I think because of this weird loophole for being a celebrity,
Speaker 3: it's not just because he was a man, but it's
Speaker 3: because he's like a celebrity man that he was able
Speaker 3: to get away with it for so long.
Speaker 4: Do you know what I'm And this could be a
Speaker 4: little bit conspiracy theory of me, but remember how last
Speaker 4: week and the week before there was all of that
Speaker 4: shit about how Instagram had changed to be more like TikTok.
Speaker 4: The CEO of Instagram had to come out and be like, guys,
Speaker 4: we stuffed up.
Speaker 2: We're going back. Kylie Jenner with someone.
Speaker 4: Who was outspoken about how much she hated the changes,
Speaker 4: And there were all those memes about warning Instagram to
Speaker 4: just go back to its former glory of nice pictures
Speaker 4: of her friends right a part of me and it
Speaker 4: could be look, this is completely me chucking a question
Speaker 4: into the air and going did Instagram know about this?
Speaker 2: Sorry? Instagram is international, Oh they know. It's not like
Speaker 2: they were asleep. They weren't all asleep.
Speaker 4: There were people there monitoring it. And the stories that
Speaker 4: were being shared of Tommy Lee's picture were being taken
Speaker 4: down for nudity. So like, let's say you worked for Instagram.
Speaker 4: You see that and you go, okay, we need to
Speaker 4: take that down.
Speaker 2: It's got nudity. Where did that come from? The whole
Speaker 2: world right now is putting up all of these pictures
Speaker 2: of this penis?
Speaker 4: Where is it coming from? Six hours, very long time
Speaker 4: to respond. But if you want to turn the conversation
Speaker 4: away and back to everyone talking about this photo that
Speaker 4: was posted on Instagram, and away from the fact that
Speaker 4: they stuffed up this new format that tried to make
Speaker 4: it look like TikTok. Guess what's a good way to
Speaker 4: do that. Let it go up, Let the world talk
Speaker 4: about Instagram. Let them kind of divert that conversation away
Speaker 4: from how it's becoming this older platform that people are
Speaker 4: not enjoying as much, and let them talk about Instagram.
Speaker 3: So instead they have an old fifty six year old
Speaker 3: man posting his dick.
Speaker 2: I'm not waiting as him to do it, Okay.
Speaker 4: I think they might have seen an opportunity and gone,
Speaker 4: how can this benefit us?
Speaker 2: When did kisha petit turn into an a theory?
Speaker 4: I'm a little bit suss on them, just because of
Speaker 4: how much the backlash about Instagram had, and like we
Speaker 4: all know that TikTok has started to take over from Instagram.
Speaker 2: I'm a little bit it.
Speaker 4: He'll be a bit tinfoil hat going on, but I
Speaker 4: reckon that there could be something to it.
Speaker 2: Okay, Well, I hours is a long time. It is
Speaker 2: a lot media world, Yes, it's a very long time.
Speaker 3: Well, I actually did a poll because I guess when
Speaker 3: I kind of unpacked the way that I felt about
Speaker 3: this whole thing. And let me tell you, I have
Speaker 3: spent way too much time thinking about Tommy Lee's dick pick,
Speaker 3: like far too long, but I wanted to put a
Speaker 3: pole out there to see how you guys were all
Speaker 3: feeling about it. Now, there was eight more than eight
Speaker 3: thousand people who responded to this pole, and these were
Speaker 3: your options. I said, if you saw Tommy Lee's schlong
Speaker 3: on install last night, did you think it was a
Speaker 3: fucking funny Twenty one percent of you said you thought
Speaker 3: it was fucking funny, b absolutely fucked, thirty eight percent
Speaker 3: of you thought it was absolutely fucked, and see didn't
Speaker 3: really care. Forty one percent of you said you didn't care,
Speaker 3: which probably means we've been speaking about it.
Speaker 2: For way too long.
Speaker 3: But the other thing I wanted to add, and I
Speaker 3: think that this I mean just taking it away from
Speaker 3: Tommy Lee, taking it away from the fact that it
Speaker 3: was like we none of us consented to seeing this
Speaker 3: dick pic. The thing that I also find very interesting
Speaker 3: is just how much Tommy Lee's penis has been spoken
Speaker 3: about over the years, and how much he hasn't had
Speaker 3: a say in his penis being spoken about. So when
Speaker 3: we talk about the sex tape that was released of
Speaker 3: him and Pam that was released against their will. His
Speaker 3: sex tape, as along with Pamela's, was released against both.
Speaker 2: Of their wills.
Speaker 3: Pamela was hugely the victim in that because of the
Speaker 3: way that society perceived her at the time, and Tommy
Speaker 3: Lee kind of came out of it as a bit
Speaker 3: of a champion because his penis was so big.
Speaker 4: Yes, he came out notorious and she came out as
Speaker 4: the quote unquote slut who filmed a sex tape.
Speaker 3: But he still didn't ask for that to happen. He
Speaker 3: still didn't want that sex tape to be released. The
Speaker 3: second thing as well in this is that if anyone
Speaker 3: has seen the Tommy and Pam docuseries that came out,
Speaker 3: there is a whole segment where he is standing in
Speaker 3: this and obviously it's an actor, but imagine if you
Speaker 3: had a docuseries made about you against your will and
Speaker 3: there is an actor there talking to his penis. The
Speaker 3: shot is like a full frontal penis shot of Tommy
Speaker 3: Lee's what's supposed to be Tommy Lee's penis. It's been
Speaker 3: tattooed and everything to make it look exactly what Tommy
Speaker 3: Lee's penis looked like in the sex tape, so once
Speaker 3: again his genitals are out there for public conversation and
Speaker 3: for public viewing.
Speaker 2: And then I.
Speaker 3: Almost feel like this is him getting to a point
Speaker 3: where he's like, fuck it here it is.
Speaker 5: Look.
Speaker 4: I think this conversation could be, Like, I definitely can
Speaker 4: see what you mean about him wanting to have ownership
Speaker 4: of his own body and or of his own body parts.
Speaker 4: I think it could be a very different conversation if
Speaker 4: he wasn't as proud of his dick like he was
Speaker 4: made famous. He was already famous, but he was made
Speaker 4: a lot more famous because of the look of his penis.
Speaker 4: And it's been I knew before I saw this photo.
Speaker 4: I have never seen the sex tape, I've never seen
Speaker 4: the Pam and Tommy dockuseries. I already knew from the
Speaker 4: pop culture space that Tommy Lee apparently has a big dick.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I agree, but I also think, like, let's look
Speaker 3: at this from the alternate perspective for a minute as well.
Speaker 3: And I, like I said, I am not here defending Instagram,
Speaker 3: nor am I here defending Tommy Lee, because I sit
Speaker 3: on the side of thinking it was wildly inappropriate. I
Speaker 3: have kids who absolutely do not need to see a
Speaker 3: man's penis on Instagram. Like, I think it was pretty
Speaker 3: fucking disgusting, but I do think it's an interesting thing
Speaker 3: to unpack. Let me flip this for a second, just
Speaker 3: going back to this idea of the double standards and
Speaker 3: the way that we kind of view female nudity versus
Speaker 3: male nudity. Imagine if her female had had a sex
Speaker 3: tape released where her and like this has happened. You
Speaker 3: don't need to imagine it, but like, just follow me
Speaker 3: along here. If a woman had had a sex tape
Speaker 3: released where her volver was front and center, then a
Speaker 3: docu series was made where her vulver once again was
Speaker 3: visibly front and center, and she didn't have ownership of it,
Speaker 3: and everyone was talking about it where her volver was talking.
Speaker 3: That's what happened in the docuseries. Tommy's penis was talking
Speaker 3: back to him. Then a few months later, she posted
Speaker 3: a photo of her.
Speaker 2: Actual volver to Instagram.
Speaker 3: Would we think it was a statement or would we
Speaker 3: think that it was just her doing a power play
Speaker 3: and trying to like claw back some sort of publicity.
Speaker 3: Would we view it differently?
Speaker 4: I think yes, I think, and I think it's a
Speaker 4: really interesting point that I hadn't actually thought about until
Speaker 4: he sat down to record this and you mentioned it, like,
Speaker 4: I don't think that i'd actually thought about it. In
Speaker 4: terms of if Pam were to do this, I would
Speaker 4: think it was a statement of her being like, I'm
Speaker 4: trying to get ownership of this back. I wouldn't necessarily have.
Speaker 4: I very much agree you made me think about how
Speaker 4: I initially thought this was pretty funny, but it wouldn't
Speaker 4: have been my response if Pamela. I wouldn't have thought
Speaker 4: it was hilarious. If Pam had been the one to
Speaker 4: post it.
Speaker 3: Who would have ever thought that a dick pic would
Speaker 3: be so thought provoking. This is certainly the most I've
Speaker 3: ever thought about one in my entire life.
Speaker 4: Well, actually, we had a lot of Facebook discussion in
Speaker 4: the discussion group. You can join it a life on
Speaker 4: Cut discussion group on Facebook. There was a lot of
Speaker 4: conversation about this, as I'm sure you are not surprised by.
Speaker 4: But there was one comment by one of our Facebook friends, Christiana,
Speaker 4: and I just loved this. She said, in all fairness,
Speaker 4: not a looking dong, a sight to behold something I'd
Speaker 4: be proud to show off when asked politely, of course,
Speaker 4: but not what I wanted to see while passing my
Speaker 4: morning stool, I thought, is exactly how the.
Speaker 2: Rise the Well felt perfectly.
Speaker 3: All right, Well, with all of that out of the way,
Speaker 3: let's get into our favorite part of the episode, accidentally unfiltered.
Speaker 2: All right, I'm gonna go first.
Speaker 3: A few years ago, I was in a shopping center
Speaker 3: and I had to kill time before a job trial.
Speaker 3: I decided to quickly go into a swimwear store and
Speaker 3: try on some bikinis. I picked a huge handful of
Speaker 3: different options and went into the Chaine rooms. I saw
Speaker 3: the sign on the door that said please keep your
Speaker 3: underwear on when trying swimwear. But for some reason, I
Speaker 3: decided I was going to ignore this. I felt like
Speaker 3: I couldn't see what the bikini looked like properly with
Speaker 3: undies on underneath.
Speaker 2: That's fair, and that's why they have the plastic thing.
Speaker 2: It's not fair. It's that is fucking rankicking. It is
Speaker 2: not fair. This was you. You wrote this in Okay.
Speaker 3: After I put a pair of swim bottoms on, then
Speaker 3: I looked at my phone and I realized the time
Speaker 3: I was running late. I quickly put my pants on
Speaker 3: over what I thought were my undies and walked out
Speaker 3: of the change room and handed the retail worker the
Speaker 3: swimmers that I didn't want. As I walked out of
Speaker 3: the store, the security buzzer went off and I realized
Speaker 3: I had walked out with the swimwear bottoms on and
Speaker 3: I had handed the retail worker my dirty undies. I
Speaker 3: was so embarrassed and realized I would either have to do.
Speaker 2: It run up.
Speaker 3: Steal the bikini bottoms, but I felt too guilty to
Speaker 3: do that, so I ended up having to walk back
Speaker 3: inside the store, colect my undies off the counter directly
Speaker 3: from in front of the woman, go back into the
Speaker 3: change room, change into my undies, and then I handed
Speaker 3: the bikini bottoms, which I had clearly tried on without underwear,
Speaker 3: despite the warning signs, back to the woman.
Speaker 2: This was the epitome of my most embarrassing moment. I
Speaker 2: have a question, that's a wal cachet. Why didn't you
Speaker 2: buy them?
Speaker 3: I'm sorry if she knows, and you know, and everyone
Speaker 3: knows that you have rubbed your vagina on those swimmers,
Speaker 3: they are not selling.
Speaker 2: You need to buy those are syllable. That's why they
Speaker 2: have the plastic.
Speaker 3: I'm sorry that you cannot try undies on in a
Speaker 3: shop you can't like.
Speaker 2: The plastic sticker is just in case that you're maybe
Speaker 2: your underwear is not thick enough. It's not for direct contact.
Speaker 4: I mean, I very much agree what I'm thinking about
Speaker 4: anyone else trying them on, because I don't want anyone
Speaker 4: else trying on.
Speaker 3: Zimt Imagine if you bought a perisoners that some one
Speaker 3: had tried on in a store, and then you, with
Speaker 3: your hands, peeled off that sticker you've touched.
Speaker 2: You just touch their vagina. I mean, without any of
Speaker 2: the pleasure.
Speaker 4: You got nothing out of it, nothing other than the
Speaker 4: remnants of a good time.
Speaker 2: You literally just got rubbish. That's all you got out
Speaker 2: of it. On this poor girl, I know why she
Speaker 2: didn't buy the underwear.
Speaker 3: Because she got to get to a job trial, because
Speaker 3: she didn't have a job, Because.
Speaker 2: That's why she couldn't buy the swimwear.
Speaker 3: Okay, I also think that you have way too much
Speaker 3: sympathy for her, and I still think you might have
Speaker 3: written that in your chat once you're acciently unfiltered.
Speaker 4: Okay, So I'm an emergency nurse, and because you're pretty
Speaker 4: much always rushing around, I had this habit of when
Speaker 4: someone asked for a vomit bag or looked like they
Speaker 4: needed it, I would grab a bag that comes neatly
Speaker 4: folded in its own little plastic ring, and I would
Speaker 4: punch my hand into the opening it would open it out.
Speaker 4: During one hectic shift, I was looking after a patient
Speaker 4: whilst I was standing at the bedside, who said to me,
Speaker 4: I think I need to vomit. I reached up, I
Speaker 4: grabbed the only bag left on the shelf, and I
Speaker 4: punched my hand into it. To my dismay, I quickly
Speaker 4: realized that the bag had already been used and I
Speaker 4: had vomit up to my elbow, as someone had already
Speaker 4: vomited in the bag and neatly folded it back onto.
Speaker 2: The shelf instead of putting it into the bin.
Speaker 3: So she literally just punched her hand. Punched her hand
Speaker 3: into liquid. It actually gets washing a bag of vomit.
Speaker 2: It gets worse.
Speaker 4: My patient still had throw up, and because there were
Speaker 4: no free vomit bags, ended up throwing up into their
Speaker 4: own hands on the bed, and so I sent the
Speaker 4: next twenty minutes apologizing cleaning up my patient, wiping their
Speaker 4: own vomit off of them, changing the vomit bed sheets,
Speaker 4: and also washing my entire right up.
Speaker 3: Can you imagine how confused that patient would have been
Speaker 3: when she picked up a full vomit bag and put
Speaker 3: down And also, I know the vomit is one of
Speaker 3: those conversations that makes people really squeamish. But I was
Speaker 3: once on a public train, super hungover. I went and
Speaker 3: saw Florence in the machine and I was so hungover,
Speaker 3: and I get motion sickness at the best of times.
Speaker 4: Dude.
Speaker 3: I was sitting on a Country Link train driving back
Speaker 3: to Wollongong, and I felt it from the depths of hell,
Speaker 3: and the only place there was was to vomit into
Speaker 3: my hands. And then I just had to drop it.
Speaker 3: What were you gonna do with it?
Speaker 2: What mean you just had to draw? I can't carry
Speaker 2: it down. It was dripping. I couldn't carry it down
Speaker 2: the carriage. I just left it.
Speaker 3: I mean I didn't just leave. I had to tell
Speaker 3: the lady that I had motion sickness. I did not
Speaker 3: tell her that I was hungover. I felt even more embarrassed. Anyway,
Speaker 3: this is not about me.
Speaker 4: I love how both of us have written in accident
Speaker 4: the unfiltereds today, I've been making art in my other people.
Speaker 2: This one time I punched a bag of mom It.
Speaker 3: Anyway, guys, on that note, let's get into the chat
Speaker 3: with Lane Beachley.
Speaker 4: Laane Beachley is a seven times world champion surfer. She
Speaker 4: spent nineteen years of her life on tour, and she
Speaker 4: was a pioneer for women in the sport of surfing.
Speaker 4: She's regarded as the most successful surfer in history, and
Speaker 4: she joins us on the podcast today.
Speaker 3: Now, we like to start every one of these interviews
Speaker 3: in exactly the same way. Is that we like to
Speaker 3: start with an accidentally unfiltered story where you tell us
Speaker 3: your most embarrassing story.
Speaker 5: Well, the challenge for me, Laura, is not to tell
Speaker 5: you my most embarrassing story. It is to pick which
Speaker 5: most embarrassing story to tell you. My life has been
Speaker 5: filled with embarrassing moments.
Speaker 3: Make sure it's the worst one like that, don't censor it.
Speaker 5: There was one I wanted to tell you, but I'm
Speaker 5: just so ashamed by my behavior that I just got.
Speaker 2: I mean, that's perfect, That's exactly what we're here for.
Speaker 3: Do you know what though it's so it's one of
Speaker 3: those things that's so galvanizing, Like everybody has something that
Speaker 3: they're so absolutely mortified by.
Speaker 2: That they are like, I'll never ever share.
Speaker 3: It, and that's the story that you should share because
Speaker 3: it makes everyone else feel better.
Speaker 5: Okay, I don't know how this could ever make anyone
Speaker 5: feel better. Certainly doesn't make me feel very good about it,
Speaker 5: but I have to get over it. So the more
Speaker 5: I share it, the more I'll process it, the less
Speaker 5: I'll care about it, and then it's out there in
Speaker 5: the world. One of the most embarrassing stories that when
Speaker 5: you ask this question, the first I always trust. The
Speaker 5: first one that comes to mind was when I was
Speaker 5: competing in Fiji many many years ago. There's about two
Speaker 5: thousand and one and your two thousand, two thousand and one. Anyway,
Speaker 5: we're at Tavarula, beautiful tropical island in the middle of
Speaker 5: the Pacific Ocean over there in Fiji. It's one of
Speaker 5: my favorite places to visit. The people is so warm
Speaker 5: and friendly and respectful. And at the time my relationship
Speaker 5: with my former partner go called Ken was really starting
Speaker 5: to dissolve, and in a typical athlete tenacious form, I
Speaker 5: just pretended that everything was okay, and even though I
Speaker 5: knew I was behaving in ways that was not congruent
Speaker 5: with who I am or aligned with my values. And
Speaker 5: we decided to party one night, and the contest was
Speaker 5: still midway. We hadn't completed it, but let's just get
Speaker 5: on the booze and hope for the best. And so
Speaker 5: we were partying, and everyone had gone to bed except
Speaker 5: for me, a lifeguard, and a couple of other None
Speaker 5: of my competitors were still out. It was just like
Speaker 5: one of the one of the lifeguards, one of the
Speaker 5: people who kind of work around there, and then me,
Speaker 5: and we decided that we were still thirsty even though
Speaker 5: they put padlocks and chains around the fridges, and I
Speaker 5: decided that there was a possibility we could possibly get
Speaker 5: under that and steal a couple of drinks because we
Speaker 5: just needed to keep going. Nothing good happens after eleven
Speaker 5: o'clock at night, right, you don't need to drink anymore.
Speaker 2: Eleven o'clock is early.
Speaker 3: Usually people say nothing good happens after two. Eleven o'clock
Speaker 3: is fair as well, nothing good happens after that.
Speaker 2: I feel like nothing good happens after a padlock A
Speaker 2: fair comment.
Speaker 5: Nothing goods happens after a padlock has been put around
Speaker 5: a bar and you think it's an invitation to get
Speaker 5: in there. So I had the lifeguard lift and it
Speaker 5: was one of those benches bench freezers fridges, and he
Speaker 5: was lifting it up, straining the chain and the padlock,
Speaker 5: and so I'm reaching in to try and get my
Speaker 5: arm in this fine little hole between the top of
Speaker 5: the freezer and the rim. And as I'm reaching in
Speaker 5: to grab what really felt like a very warm beer.
Speaker 5: As I'm reaching into, the chain breaks, the freezer hits
Speaker 5: me in the chin. My tooth goes through my lip.
Speaker 5: I get a fat limp, and all of it has
Speaker 5: been captured on CCTV. So I then have to front
Speaker 5: up and face the music the following morning. Meanwhile, before
Speaker 5: that happens, I have to go and surf for heat.
Speaker 5: The waves pop up overnight. I'm hungover, feeling very sad
Speaker 5: and sorry for myself, with a fat lip, and incredibly
Speaker 5: embarrassed by my behavior. Anyway, I go out, I lose
Speaker 5: anyone surprised I lose in that heat. I come in
Speaker 5: and then the general manager of the tour at the
Speaker 5: time decides to rake me over the coals and made
Speaker 5: me watch the vision back and explain myself.
Speaker 2: Oh, no, unnecessary. He knows what's happened.
Speaker 3: We've seen it, do you know what, though, You're just
Speaker 3: lucky that this wasn't of the time of social media,
Speaker 3: or that's where it would have ended up, and then
Speaker 3: you would be reliving it all the time.
Speaker 5: The amount of things that I've done that have not
Speaker 5: been captured on social media is an absolute blessing in disguise.
Speaker 5: There's no way that my career would have the adulation
Speaker 5: and respect that it has. Everything that I did that
Speaker 5: was somewhat duplicitous or nefarious was caught on capture on
Speaker 5: social media.
Speaker 3: What I'm taking of that story, anyway, is just that
Speaker 3: you like a challenge, Like you saw an obstacle, you
Speaker 3: thought there's a way to overcome this. Unfortunately it doesn't
Speaker 3: always work out that way.
Speaker 5: Solutions focused well, Lane.
Speaker 3: We often start these interviews by asking what was your
Speaker 3: childhood like? And I feel like for you, your childhood has
Speaker 3: had such a profound impact on who you are as
Speaker 3: a person, and it's such an interesting part of your story.
Speaker 3: Could you tell us a little bit about what it
Speaker 3: was growing up as a Beachley, but more so, how
Speaker 3: you became a Beachley in the first place.
Speaker 5: So I was adopted into a beach loving family with
Speaker 5: the last name Beachley and became a world champion surfer.
Speaker 2: How many times have you heard that?
Speaker 4: That is so coincidental that you were adopted into the
Speaker 4: Beachley household and you spent your whole life.
Speaker 2: On the beach. I'm sure that's the fast I remember, right.
Speaker 5: If only I was given a dollar for every time
Speaker 5: I heard that, So you now owe me a dollar?
Speaker 2: Okay?
Speaker 5: Highyeah. And my dad was a surfer, and my brother
Speaker 5: Jason's a surfer, and the mother whod me was not
Speaker 5: a surfer, but love the beach. So we would just
Speaker 5: spend every day possible at the beach. I remember being
Speaker 5: plunked on the sand before I could walk, and I
Speaker 5: remember falling in love with the nature and the beauty
Speaker 5: and the freedom of the ocean and the sand and
Speaker 5: the sun. I mean, the ocean is my happy place
Speaker 5: and still is to this day. So I was very
Speaker 5: fortunate to have been adopted into that beach loving family
Speaker 5: and then be given the opportunity to fulfill my dreams
Speaker 5: and ambitions and set such audacious goals. But when I
Speaker 5: was four years old, that's when I started surfing. When
Speaker 5: I was five years old, I started surfing on the
Speaker 5: ocean side. I actually started surfing on the harbor side.
Speaker 5: When the fairies came in. That's when I would test
Speaker 5: my balance and ride my foaming.
Speaker 2: And this was at Manly Beach. Is that correct?
Speaker 5: Manley Beach? Yeah, the most appropriately named beach in the world.
Speaker 5: Nantown I call it. And yeah. And so by the
Speaker 5: time I'm six years of age, I'm out there having
Speaker 5: a ball. And that's when we lost Valerie. We lost
Speaker 5: my mum, Valerie to high blood pressure. She had a
Speaker 5: brain hemorrhage on the operating table during cosmetic surgery of
Speaker 5: all bloody things.
Speaker 3: Wo.
Speaker 5: So that was deeply distressing. And then that's when kids
Speaker 5: started asking questions, why do you look so different to
Speaker 5: your family? Where do you come from? Because all my
Speaker 5: family are over six foot tall, they're pasty white skins,
Speaker 5: they got brown hair, and I'm five foot well and
Speaker 5: five five. I've got dark olive skin. I've got bright
Speaker 5: blonde hair and bright blue eyes. So I didn't really
Speaker 5: look very much like my family. There was very few
Speaker 5: similarities as an eight year old. That's when dad decided
Speaker 5: to tell me that I was adopted and he knew
Speaker 5: nothing about my biological family at all.
Speaker 2: How did you take that information as an eight year old?
Speaker 5: At firstly I felt like the couch was swallowing me whole.
Speaker 5: I felt so scared because I had wrapped my identity
Speaker 5: around this story that I belonged here, this is my
Speaker 5: family unit, this is where I've always come from. And unfortunately,
Speaker 5: by the time you're six, your brainwaves have shifted and
Speaker 5: instead of being a narcissist and everything's happening about you,
Speaker 5: to you and for you, your brainwaves get to this
Speaker 5: capacity where you can judge, criticize, analyze, and create meaning
Speaker 5: around stories. So my dad said, you're my baby girl.
Speaker 5: We've always loved duty of not a blood relation. I heard,
Speaker 5: you've been abandoned by your own mother. You've been rejected
Speaker 5: by your mother. Your own mother didn't even want you.
Speaker 5: Therefore you are undeserving of love. That's how I took it.
Speaker 5: So I was very scared, felt very abandoned, felt very rejected,
Speaker 5: and instantly decided that I was now worthless. And I
Speaker 5: thought that the only way I could become worthy or
Speaker 5: deserving of love is that if I become a world
Speaker 5: champion surfer. So that's literally the goal that I set
Speaker 5: myself as an eight year old was to become a
Speaker 5: world champion, not a surfer, just a world champion, and
Speaker 5: I basically wrapped all my sense of self worth, my identity,
Speaker 5: my vision of success was around unless I become a
Speaker 5: world champion, I will never be deserving of love.
Speaker 3: Did you feel resentful or angry that you didn't know earlier?
Speaker 3: Because I feel like by eight, you really, even though
Speaker 3: you're still so young, as you said, you have this
Speaker 3: real understanding of your identity, of your place in the world.
Speaker 3: And also, coming off the back of your mother's death,
Speaker 3: you've already lost a cent of identity. You're already in
Speaker 3: this turmoil and grief to then be given another piece
Speaker 3: of information that who you thought you were doesn't quite
Speaker 3: fit into that puzzle anymore.
Speaker 2: Was there resentment there?
Speaker 5: It's a difficult thing to reflect on and anchor down
Speaker 5: those feelings. I have no doubt there was sadness. There
Speaker 5: must have been anger and frustration and that sense of
Speaker 5: loss because I lost my sense of identity and my
Speaker 5: sense of belonging, my sense of being and I don't remember.
Speaker 5: I don't recall feeling resentful or having resentful is not
Speaker 5: really an emotion that I tend to resort to. But
Speaker 5: there was definitely anger and sadness involved, for sure.
Speaker 4: And when was it that you found out about your
Speaker 4: biological mum?
Speaker 2: Was that you know in your childhood or was that
Speaker 2: much later in life?
Speaker 5: Much much later? So Dad told me when I was eight.
Speaker 5: I then joined the pro Tool fresh out of high
Speaker 5: school when I was seventeen, and then traveling the world
Speaker 5: seeing what the rest of the world has was very
Speaker 5: eye opening. And I often say that joining the pro
Speaker 5: to a fresh out of high school gave me a
Speaker 5: much broader education than any institution could ever give me.
Speaker 5: But it also opens when you open cans of worms.
Speaker 5: It presents as many questions as it does answers. So
Speaker 5: I started to seek more understanding of who am I,
Speaker 5: Where do I come from? Why am I the way
Speaker 5: that I am? Because I was constantly either being judged
Speaker 5: or ridiculed or told that I was this way, and
Speaker 5: I wanted to get an understanding of where does this
Speaker 5: behavior or where do these characteristics emanate from? So I
Speaker 5: went to the birth Deess and Marriages Registry in Sydney
Speaker 5: and applied for my original birth certificate because in the
Speaker 5: seventies it wasn't mandatory to have connection or contact. You
Speaker 5: didn't have to leave your details as a biological parent
Speaker 5: to allow you. Actually there was vetos on a lot
Speaker 5: of kids in that stage to actually prevent them from
Speaker 5: reaching out to connect with their biological families. So I
Speaker 5: fortunately when I applied there was no contact veto and
Speaker 5: I received my original birth certificate. So that gave me
Speaker 5: my mother's name, my name that I was born with,
Speaker 5: which was Tanyamara's Gardner, and it gave me an understanding
Speaker 5: of who she was and where she was at. So
Speaker 5: she was born in Glasgow, she was living in Surrey Hills,
Speaker 5: she was seventeen years of age. So we just put
Speaker 5: a story around that that perhaps maybe she was a
Speaker 5: backpacker or you know, who knows what happened. But that
Speaker 5: gave me some sort of solace in understanding, Okay, this
Speaker 5: is who I am, and this is where I've come from,
Speaker 5: and this is why I was given up And that
Speaker 5: helped me kind of piece it all together. And you
Speaker 5: know what, that same general manager of the tour decided
Speaker 5: to hand me because that certificate. That birth certificate came
Speaker 5: to me while I was in South Africa preparing to compete.
Speaker 5: Actually I was competing. It was a day that I
Speaker 5: was competing, and he received it from my flatmate who
Speaker 5: faxed it through and he decided I hand it to
Speaker 5: me fifteen minutes before I paddled out, like just clueless.
Speaker 5: So he adds me and my birth certificate right before
Speaker 5: I've paddled out, and of course it messes with my head,
Speaker 5: and I still win because I'm able to pull myself together.
Speaker 5: But that was the first indication of my original identity,
Speaker 5: and then that set the wheels in motion.
Speaker 3: What did you do with that information? I mean, even
Speaker 3: just knowing what your birth name was. I can't even
Speaker 3: imagine how foreign that must have felt. What do you
Speaker 3: do with that information? When you have a little bit
Speaker 3: of an insight into who your birth mother is, you.
Speaker 5: Take time to process it. That's fortunately what I did.
Speaker 5: I mean, I'd processed it while I was in the water,
Speaker 5: which was a massive distraction and I almost lost the heat,
Speaker 5: but I was able to get my head back in
Speaker 5: the game. And then I came in and I spoke
Speaker 5: to friends about it, who understood the journey that I've
Speaker 5: been on and were willing to share in that journey,
Speaker 5: and I shared some of my questions and just spoke
Speaker 5: about it, just shared it because a problem shared is
Speaker 5: a problem halved. And it did present quite a lot
Speaker 5: of challenges to me and understanding how important this piece
Speaker 5: of information was to fulfilling my desire to get a
Speaker 5: clearer picture of who I am and why I am there.
Speaker 5: But the thing is that what it did teach me
Speaker 5: is that we don't need to rely on our past
Speaker 5: to determine our future. You know, our past is a
Speaker 5: great reference point and we can learn a lot from it,
Speaker 5: But we decide who we are, We decide how we
Speaker 5: show up, how we feel, how we behave, and we
Speaker 5: can't keep relying on the events of our past or
Speaker 5: the genetic predisposition of our ancestors to predetermine how we
Speaker 5: feel about ourselves. So in the hindsight, I realized I
Speaker 5: was relying on historical references to validate who I am
Speaker 5: today when in actual fact, the only one that gives
Speaker 5: me permission to do that is me.
Speaker 4: Did your biological moment at the time know who you
Speaker 4: had become and the successes that you had.
Speaker 5: Gained no, and we didn't make contact first time until
Speaker 5: nineteen ninety nineteen ninety nine reached out to me. So
Speaker 5: I was twenty seven and I was about about six
Speaker 5: weeks away from winning my second world title. All these
Speaker 5: dates and numbers your following when.
Speaker 2: You've got so many trophies time, I do remember.
Speaker 5: Just by the years. I know, I won my first
Speaker 5: one in nineteen ninety eight, so it's on from there.
Speaker 5: And so she reached out to my dad and at
Speaker 5: the time, somehow she said she'd been searching for me
Speaker 5: for years and she found I don't know how she
Speaker 5: found it, but she found that my last name was Beachley,
Speaker 5: and the first person in the phone book under that
Speaker 5: name was my dad, and so she reached out to him.
Speaker 5: And that was the time that she found out that
Speaker 5: my mother had died when I was young, and that
Speaker 5: I grew up without the family unit that she so
Speaker 5: desperately wanted me to have, and that my name had
Speaker 5: been changed, and that was all a lot for her
Speaker 5: to process because she had these grand ideals around. You know,
Speaker 5: she wanted me to grow up with the name Tanya.
Speaker 5: She wanted me to have a mother and father, you know,
Speaker 5: she wanted all these things for me that she couldn't
Speaker 5: give me, and so she felt like she'd let me down.
Speaker 5: And my dad did his best to reassure her that
Speaker 5: she know she's part of a very loving family unit
Speaker 5: and that she's done okay for herself. But she's Indonesia.
Speaker 5: So she wrapped this story around the fact that I've
Speaker 5: made perhaps I'm a journalist and I've gone to Indonesia
Speaker 5: to find a story or something. Anyway, Google No, she
Speaker 5: googled me and found out who I was and what
Speaker 5: I'd done, and so then she got all excited and
Speaker 5: then got a little too excited because after my I
Speaker 5: was in I was on a surf trip in Indo
Speaker 5: went back to Hawaii. Dad ranged me and said, your
Speaker 5: mother's called. And I was like, well what, Dad, Yeah,
Speaker 5: first mom's dead. No, by lund, your mother's God like
Speaker 5: what I gave her you? I gave her your name,
Speaker 5: but I didn't give her your number, and I told
Speaker 5: her you would make contact with her when you were ready.
Speaker 5: And then there was all these stories from you know,
Speaker 5: my partner at the time. I wonder if she's googled you.
Speaker 5: I wonder if she's a gold digger, you know, if
Speaker 5: she's a fame, bit of a moth, you know, moth
Speaker 5: after a bright flame. Who knows what the circumstances are,
Speaker 5: but you know, he wrapped all this kind of almost
Speaker 5: fear ambiguity around it, and I just wouldn't look I
Speaker 5: trust it. I'm going to make the conversation. I'm going
Speaker 5: to make the effort to have a conversation with it,
Speaker 5: but I'm going to wait till I get home, when
Speaker 5: I'm in my own home and my own space and
Speaker 5: I can feel comfortable and relaxed. Before I had that chance,
Speaker 5: she picked up the phone and called my home phone
Speaker 5: number and then tried to make up for the last
Speaker 5: twenty seven years in the first fifteen minutes of our
Speaker 5: first phone call together. So it was really confronting.
Speaker 3: I guess there's so much for you at that point
Speaker 3: to package up and to actually get your head around.
Speaker 3: And also for someone you said your mum was seventeen
Speaker 3: or your birth mother was seventeen when she put you
Speaker 3: up for adoption, there's also a lifetime of her wondering
Speaker 3: where your life is and wondering about this child that
Speaker 3: she said goodbye to. Can you tell us a little
Speaker 3: bit around why she at that time, at seventeen put
Speaker 3: you up for adoption.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I'd say the one big regret I have is
Speaker 5: actually never of deciding to view it from her perspective.
Speaker 5: You know, it was all about me.
Speaker 2: Impossible too though at that age.
Speaker 5: Yes, of course, but I didn't take the time to think,
Speaker 5: imagine what I have, no idea what she's been through
Speaker 5: to give birth to me. And in the seventies, you know,
Speaker 5: it would have been easily to abort me. There was
Speaker 5: no guarantees that she was going to keep me. And
Speaker 5: so in the first meeting I hear from her that
Speaker 5: she went on a date. She was an aspiring model
Speaker 5: and went on a date with a guy who owned
Speaker 5: a modeling agency, and after dinner he invited her back
Speaker 5: to his place, and she thought that that was an
Speaker 5: innocent introduction, and then he took advantage of her and
Speaker 5: raped her, and then I was conceived. So essentially I'm
Speaker 5: the product of date rape. And she says in my
Speaker 5: book that she picked up the phone and called him
Speaker 5: and said, this is what you've done, goodbye. And so
Speaker 5: we don't actually have any record of this guy who
Speaker 5: what I know his first name, don't know his last name,
Speaker 5: and SBS have come knocking asking me to do who
Speaker 5: do you think you are? And when they basically ran
Speaker 5: all the facts that my mum had about this guy,
Speaker 5: they all rang true. You know, there's really no evidence
Speaker 5: of this guy, so I can't do that. I have
Speaker 5: no connection to the paternal side of my being, but
Speaker 5: that's okay. I have a very nurturing dad and loving husband,
Speaker 5: and so I connect in that way. But as far
Speaker 5: as try to make sense of it, it's very difficult
Speaker 5: because it's smoke and mirrors back there. No, there's no
Speaker 5: real guarantees about what I'll find, so I can see
Speaker 5: through date rape and then her parents told her that
Speaker 5: she wasn't allowed to keep me, so she put me
Speaker 5: up for adoption, and then the rest is history.
Speaker 3: You know, you said something early on which really like
Speaker 3: I've been waiting to bring it back up with you,
Speaker 3: so sorry to pull it back up from the depths
Speaker 3: of the interview. You said that when you very first
Speaker 3: decided like I'm going to be a world champion, I'm
Speaker 3: going to be the best at this, I'm going to succeed,
Speaker 3: that a lot of those feelings were spurred on when
Speaker 3: you were eight years old and you found out that
Speaker 3: you had been adopted, and you were like, I'll prove
Speaker 3: my worthiness. I want to get into that whole period
Speaker 3: of your life and the successes that you did have.
Speaker 3: But what do you do when you have created a
Speaker 3: whole life around achieving, succeeding and being the absolute best
Speaker 3: at something. What happens when you come to the end
Speaker 3: of that journey and your whole identity and worthiness is
Speaker 3: tied up in being one thing.
Speaker 5: You feel lost. That's what happened. You lose all sense
Speaker 5: of self. I mean, it's a wonderful question because everybody
Speaker 5: goes through it, especially if you're as fiercely dedicated, committed
Speaker 5: and tenacious as I am. And I did feel really
Speaker 5: lost at the end of my career, even though I
Speaker 5: chose to retire, and it was a really easy decision
Speaker 5: to make. For retire, I'm still working as hard as ever, But.
Speaker 2: From that one thing that you were like, that's it.
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I had to find a mentor
Speaker 5: to help me through it because I kept thinking that
Speaker 5: I had to reinvent myself. I kept thinking I had
Speaker 5: to do the next thing that was going to bring
Speaker 5: me that next sense of fulfillment. Annihilation, nothing compares to
Speaker 5: standing on a podium in a bikini, holding a world
Speaker 5: titled trophy above your head, being sprayed with champagne. It's
Speaker 5: just there's no nothing like.
Speaker 4: It, you know, for me, that's a regular Saturday like
Speaker 4: that on a podium.
Speaker 2: Getting sprayed and hanging out in your bikini. He's single,
Speaker 2: she's living the best life.
Speaker 5: A trophy above your head. It's irreplaceable, and it's it's
Speaker 5: a difficult thing to let go of. Like when you say, Laura,
Speaker 5: when you defined yourself by it, you know your whole
Speaker 5: sense of self and identity has been wrapped up in it.
Speaker 5: So I had to redefine. I had to let go
Speaker 5: and start all over again. As Ben Crow often says,
Speaker 5: I was a human doing and I had to become
Speaker 5: a human being. And I learned so much from my
Speaker 5: professional career. And that's what I'm teaching people today, either
Speaker 5: through a wake academy or from on stage as a
Speaker 5: motivational speaker or facilitator. But ultimately it's about defining who
Speaker 5: you are, how you feel, and what you want and
Speaker 5: then you can then go and see gifts with the world.
Speaker 5: But if you're sense of self worth is constantly wrapped
Speaker 5: up in things outside of you, then no matter what
Speaker 5: you do, you're never going to be enough. And then
Speaker 5: you're riding this roller coaster when one day you're successful,
Speaker 5: so therefore you're up, and the next day you may fail,
Speaker 5: so therefore you're down. And then it's just like this
Speaker 5: consistent roller coaster that just slaps you around and there's
Speaker 5: just no comfort, no satisfaction, no joy, and it just
Speaker 5: it rips you apart to the point where when you
Speaker 5: if you become so identified with and defined by things
Speaker 5: outside of you that your heart is just never feel
Speaker 5: and it's never full, it's never filled. You just feel
Speaker 5: incomplete and unhappy and dissatisfied all your life.
Speaker 4: Plane it makes me question, you know you were You're
Speaker 4: a seven times world champion. You're the only surfer male
Speaker 4: or female to ever get six in a row, so
Speaker 4: the most successful.
Speaker 5: Not even King Kelly. You can read six.
Speaker 4: When you are at that level of a success, I assume,
Speaker 4: I mean I I've never done anything to that extent,
Speaker 4: so I can't personally relate like to have that amount
Speaker 4: of dedication to something.
Speaker 2: Do you have to be one hundred percent?
Speaker 5: You know?
Speaker 2: Are you talking about that?
Speaker 4: You struggled after you retired because it was the only
Speaker 4: thing that you identified with. But is there any other option, Like,
Speaker 4: when you are so wholly devoted to surfing, was there
Speaker 4: time for anything else?
Speaker 5: Yes? Absolutely, I made time for other things. And no
Speaker 5: matter how much you love your job, and no matter
Speaker 5: how committed you are doing, you still need a break
Speaker 5: from it. And I learned that early on because we
Speaker 5: often believe that the only way achieved something is through
Speaker 5: the way in which we know. And what I've learned
Speaker 5: throughout my career is that I can disprove what I
Speaker 5: know by learning how to do it a different way.
Speaker 5: So I've won seven world titles. I won six in
Speaker 5: a row, but I only won two in a state
Speaker 5: of love, the other five a one in a state
Speaker 5: of fear. And the way that I differentiate the two
Speaker 5: is when I'm in a state of fear, I'm outcome driven.
Speaker 5: So when I'm not winning, I am losing and I
Speaker 5: am a dismal failure. When I'm losing, I beat myself up,
Speaker 5: I give myself hard time. So now I'm winning at
Speaker 5: all costs. If you're not with me, get the fuck
Speaker 5: out of my way. I'm on an absolute mission and
Speaker 5: I'm on a path of destruction, so I must win.
Speaker 5: You don't understand how much of my self worth, my identity,
Speaker 5: everything about me is wrapped up in this and if
Speaker 5: I don't achieve this, then it's your fault, So piss off,
Speaker 5: leave me alone. I got to get this done. That's
Speaker 5: world titles number two to six, number one to seven,
Speaker 5: my loved based world titles. We're one in a love
Speaker 5: of process. How can I be better today than I
Speaker 5: was yesterday? If I'm a little bit fatigued, then what
Speaker 5: do I need to do to re energize my body?
Speaker 5: If I'm feeling really focused and energized, am I making
Speaker 5: the most use of that particular amount of energy? So
Speaker 5: everything was self actualized. Everything was in alignment. And when
Speaker 5: I had good days, there were good days. But when
Speaker 5: I had bad days, they weren't bad days, they were
Speaker 5: speed bumps. So when I wasn't winning, I was learning.
Speaker 5: So the victim mentality is if I'm not winning, I'm losing.
Speaker 5: The victor is if I'm not winning, I'm learning. It's
Speaker 5: a really subtle mindset shift to go from losing to learning.
Speaker 5: But it just comes down to a commitment and asking
Speaker 5: yourself is the way in which I'm going after my goals,
Speaker 5: or the way in which I'm pursuing my ambition sustainable
Speaker 5: because welld title number one and seven prove to me
Speaker 5: that it can be done in a sustainable, fun and
Speaker 5: effortless way if you continue to thank yourself in gratitude.
Speaker 5: Well titles number two to six, which were win at
Speaker 5: all costs mentality, must get this job done. If my
Speaker 5: body's breaking, it's just a sign that I have to
Speaker 5: work harder. I will not honor my body, I will
Speaker 5: not honor my health. I will sacrifice and compromise every
Speaker 5: aspect of my being because if I don't win, I
Speaker 5: will not be deserving of love. And I prove to
Speaker 5: myself that I was worthy and deserving. And Well title
Speaker 5: number one, why did I stop trusting in that? Because
Speaker 5: I've place to story around it?
Speaker 3: That was going to be my very next question. I
Speaker 3: was like, why did something change? At World title number two?
Speaker 5: I just expected more of myself. I thought that the
Speaker 5: world expected more of me, and the only way that
Speaker 5: I was going to fulfill that expectation is by working
Speaker 5: twice as hard, trying twice as hard, doing twice as more.
Speaker 5: And then I wonder why my body breaks down. So
Speaker 5: halfway through the first nineteen ninety nine was my second
Speaker 5: world title, and in May I tear the medial ligament
Speaker 5: in my right knee. Now, instead of taking six weeks out,
Speaker 5: I take ten days out, and I come back and
Speaker 5: I surf and I compete, and then I win the
Speaker 5: richest event in the world at the time with a
Speaker 5: knee brace on. And then the next time I fracture
Speaker 5: a rib, I surf. Well, it feels like I've got
Speaker 5: a punctured lung. You know when there's a rib out
Speaker 5: and it just feels like it's constantly hitting you with lungs.
Speaker 5: You can't breathe properly. And then I smash my face.
Speaker 5: I get a wave that lands on the back of
Speaker 5: my neck, horne heads a disc because heav's my spinal cord.
Speaker 5: Eighty percent of my spinal cord is seven My left
Speaker 5: arm is numb, atrophy pins and needles, blood, hot butter knife,
Speaker 5: wedge between my shoulder blades. You know what I did,
Speaker 5: ignored it. Let's just keep going, Let's just keep pushing through.
Speaker 5: A wave lands on the smaller my low back folds
Speaker 5: me in half, crushes my lumbar spine. Paddle back out
Speaker 5: thirty minutes later to win another world title, like just push, push, push,
Speaker 5: it all costs, gotta win. And now in my fifties,
Speaker 5: I am in constant pain management. I have to go
Speaker 5: and see physios, I have to do cryo chambers, I
Speaker 5: have to see chiropractice, massage therapists. I have at least
Speaker 5: two sessions a week just to manage my body because
Speaker 5: I didn't honor it when I was competing.
Speaker 3: You know, you speak about this from someone who worked
Speaker 3: and performed at the most elite level of professional serving
Speaker 3: and you are the one who put all of these
Speaker 3: demands on yourself because success was so important to you.
Speaker 3: Something I think that's so important is like people do
Speaker 3: this in different variations, not just in professional sport, but
Speaker 3: people do this in different ways.
Speaker 2: In their life all the time.
Speaker 3: From what you've learned, and when you got to a
Speaker 3: point when you were like, my body is like I've
Speaker 3: done this to myself. I can't keep performing at this level.
Speaker 2: What changed in you?
Speaker 3: How did you recognize that you were just at a
Speaker 3: point where you were completely taking yourself for granted, or
Speaker 3: you kept expecting and yes, you could keep doing it,
Speaker 3: but you kept expecting an amount from yourself that was
Speaker 3: not sustainable.
Speaker 5: What changed? Well, I won my six consecutive world title.
Speaker 5: I decided that winning six consecutive world titles meant being
Speaker 5: the most successful surfer in history. I had defined success
Speaker 5: as being the most successful surfer in history, and I
Speaker 5: defined being worthy of love as being successful, which meant
Speaker 5: being a six times consecutive world champion. So what changed
Speaker 5: was a friend of mine said, to you enough yet,
Speaker 5: And she asked her in a way where she said,
Speaker 5: what's driving you? Do you think it's because you're adopted?
Speaker 5: And that was the first time that question had been
Speaker 5: asked in that way to me. And it's so strongly
Speaker 5: resonated with my heart it almost put a stake through it.
Speaker 5: I just went, oh, oh, my goodness, I'm still trying
Speaker 5: to prove that eight year old girl that she's enough.
Speaker 5: I'm still I'm trying to prove to the world that
Speaker 5: that little eight year old who felt so scared, so abandoned,
Speaker 5: so rejected, even though she was being reassured that she
Speaker 5: is loved and worthy and belongs here. She has been
Speaker 5: proving to the world that until she becomes something, she'll
Speaker 5: never be enough. And the lesson that I've learned is
Speaker 5: no one can ever tell you that you're enough. No
Speaker 5: one will ever give you permission to be enough unless
Speaker 5: you do. You know, we all talk about how love
Speaker 5: comes from the self. You know what enoughness comes from
Speaker 5: the self as well. Enoughness is acceptance that where you are,
Speaker 5: who you are, what you're doing right here, right now
Speaker 5: is more than enough. Now. I had convinced myself that
Speaker 5: myself that the only way that I could be enough
Speaker 5: was to become the most successful surfer in history. And
Speaker 5: then I got there and I went, am I enough yet? Yeah?
Speaker 5: I'm enough now? Okay, so now let's go for another one.
Speaker 4: You know, I think exactly like what Laura just said
Speaker 4: that you did this in the sense that very few
Speaker 4: people are professional athletes that are seeking validation by getting
Speaker 4: world titles.
Speaker 2: But I think a lot of us.
Speaker 4: I mean, I know that for a lot of my
Speaker 4: girlfriends and I we've spent a lot of our twenties
Speaker 4: kind of figuring out.
Speaker 2: Whether we're enough for the guy that we're dating.
Speaker 4: And I think that when you get to that point
Speaker 4: of realization of I mean, for me, it came in
Speaker 4: my quite late twenties when I really started to unpack
Speaker 4: validation and started to unpack why do I feel as though.
Speaker 2: I'm not enough for these people?
Speaker 4: And I think that there's that point of our maturity
Speaker 4: perhaps where you really start to process, Actually, this might
Speaker 4: not have anything to do with not being enough for
Speaker 4: this other person. This might have a little bit to
Speaker 4: do with me and about me seeking validation in unhealthy ways.
Speaker 4: And I think for you, seems that you sought it
Speaker 4: through winning, through becoming the absolute best at say when.
Speaker 3: I think it's even interesting that you say that, keish
Speaker 3: because I don't see this necessarily as being a token
Speaker 3: of maturity, because I think there are plenty of people
Speaker 3: who are in their fifty sixties, seventies who never reach
Speaker 3: a state of being able to self validate. I think
Speaker 3: that it's a mindset, it's you know, some people might
Speaker 3: learn it in their twenties, some people might learn it
Speaker 3: in their fifties. I don't think that it's necessarily something
Speaker 3: that you just arrive at when you hit thirty years
Speaker 3: of age and you go, ah, now I realize I
Speaker 3: don't need to get my validation from external sources.
Speaker 5: And to that point, I know teenagers that are enough. Yeah,
Speaker 5: I know thirteen year olds, twelve year olds, ten year olds,
Speaker 5: six year olds, that are enough.
Speaker 3: Lane, Just speaking about your time in surfing, working in
Speaker 3: an industry that was so male dominated, What was it
Speaker 3: like at that time? And this is very much in
Speaker 3: terms of just your day to day being a professional
Speaker 3: sports athlete in an industry that women didn't really have
Speaker 3: a foothold in it yet, what was it like being
Speaker 3: a pioneer of that sport.
Speaker 5: It was a shit show. It was a chauvinistic, sexist
Speaker 5: shit show. Yeah, the nineteen eighties, seventies, eighties and nineties
Speaker 5: and women's surfing was not a very glamorous or welcoming
Speaker 5: place to find yourself as a woman. It was really toxic.
Speaker 5: You know. We were first rejected by our male counterparts,
Speaker 5: We had no support from the industry, and the governing
Speaker 5: body really saw us as a distraction to the men.
Speaker 5: So if you've seen that documentary called Girls Can't Surf,
Speaker 5: that's a really classic snapshot of what we were encountered,
Speaker 5: what we're up against. Like, let's cancel the women's event,
Speaker 5: put the money back into the men because we want
Speaker 5: to pay them more because they attract bigger crowds. But
Speaker 5: then we'll keep the bikini contest. It was a really
Speaker 5: toxic culture, and like it says in the film, we
Speaker 5: weren't given permission by the surf industry, of the surf
Speaker 5: culture to be embraced by it, supported by it. So,
Speaker 5: as Catherine Fox and Kirsten Ferguson wrote in their book Womenkind,
Speaker 5: when women find themselves in an environment where they devalued,
Speaker 5: they devalue themselves and they devalue each other. And that's
Speaker 5: what women surfing look like to me in the nineties.
Speaker 5: So not only were we devalued by the industry and
Speaker 5: our male counterparts and the governing body, but then we
Speaker 5: saw every opportunity as a threat. So there were no opportunities.
Speaker 5: Everything was a challenge, and so we dragged each other down,
Speaker 5: we pulled each other back, and we really didn't celebrate
Speaker 5: or elevate each other. And it was divide and conquer.
Speaker 5: There was no collaboration, there was no cohesion. There was
Speaker 5: very little camaraderie. And women are the minority in the
Speaker 5: majority of situations, so if we see another woman succeed,
Speaker 5: we automatically think that's one less opportunity available to us.
Speaker 5: But at the end of the day, if I reflect
Speaker 5: on my career, every single one of us knew that
Speaker 5: when we were entering the sporting arena, when we're entering
Speaker 5: competition and well titled only one person's going to win lane.
Speaker 2: I fucking love that quote.
Speaker 3: I had never heard that before, but it's so I mean,
Speaker 3: and I think it's true for so many things that
Speaker 3: you've spoken about so far, Like, yes, it's relative to
Speaker 3: the sporting world, that's relative to how women interact with
Speaker 3: each other in many different industries on social media in
Speaker 3: so many different ways. And I remember having a conversation
Speaker 3: with someone recently and the response to something that we
Speaker 3: were talking about was like, oh, well, women are the
Speaker 3: worst for it, like they're so mean to each other
Speaker 3: on social media or they're so mean in how they interact.
Speaker 3: And it is exactly what you just said. It's this
Speaker 3: idea that when we're already pitted against each other, that
Speaker 3: we turn on each other. Yeah, And I think there's
Speaker 3: so much to learn in that conversation as well.
Speaker 5: And the advertising agencies or the advertising world in the
Speaker 5: marketing world ride off the back of that. They ride
Speaker 5: off our vulnerability, they ride off our belief that we're
Speaker 5: done enough by negatively reinforcing us to belief that we
Speaker 5: aren't enough. We're never going to be happy until we
Speaker 5: achieve this. We're not going to be deemed successful until
Speaker 5: we achieve that. We're not going to have enough money
Speaker 5: until we're able to drive that, live there, wear this,
Speaker 5: do that. You're not pretty enough, tall enough, skinny enough,
Speaker 5: short enough, Like, no matter what you do, you're never enough.
Speaker 5: So we're constantly reinforced to believe that. And then, like
Speaker 5: I said, if we see limited opportunity, then instead of
Speaker 5: elevating another to do it and celebrating that, we pull
Speaker 5: the push them out of the way and stomp on
Speaker 5: them and silicone the glass ceiling up and say, look,
Speaker 5: I had to do it tough, but it's worked out
Speaker 5: all right for me, So you're going to have to
Speaker 5: do it tougher because I want you to be better
Speaker 5: than me. It's like, where's the encouragement, where's the compassion,
Speaker 5: the consideration, Like the whole reason that we've got female
Speaker 5: pioneers is to pave the way, not to close it
Speaker 5: up and seal it up and preventing the other woman
Speaker 5: from getting through there. You know, one of my major
Speaker 5: bug bears is seeing women in leadership positions making it
Speaker 5: harder for women to follow in their footsteps. Where the
Speaker 5: sign of a good teacher is when their student succeeds them.
Speaker 2: What is the female surfing world like now?
Speaker 5: No, it's a very very different environment.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 4: Yeah, And does that make you proud because I know
Speaker 4: that you were a really monumental part in changing that narrative.
Speaker 5: Absolutely, I'm really proud of where women's surfing is today.
Speaker 5: To say that there's still a long way to go,
Speaker 5: and I'm proud of where women's sport is today, but
Speaker 5: then there's a shit time of work still to be
Speaker 5: done to make that a better playing field for women.
Speaker 5: We all want to experience a state of equality. Whatever
Speaker 5: that looks like and feels like, I don't know. But
Speaker 5: as long as we can keep pushing the cause and
Speaker 5: reinforcing the need to have female role models and pioneers
Speaker 5: in environments where they're paving the way for future generations.
Speaker 5: The way I like to present it is every pioneer
Speaker 5: must have the courage to plant a seed and water
Speaker 5: that seed to grow a tree that they may one
Speaker 5: day never have the chance to sit under. And quite honestly,
Speaker 5: in my life, I never expected women's surfing to be
Speaker 5: the first surfing to be the first sport to announce
Speaker 5: pay equity. Not in my wildest dreams that I see coming.
Speaker 5: But I'm really grateful that I was a part of
Speaker 5: that narrative and drove that so hard because I was
Speaker 5: just extremely disappointed in the way in which we were treated.
Speaker 5: I mean, in nineteen years on tour, I owned a
Speaker 5: half a million dollars in prize money. Today, Stephanie Gilmore
Speaker 5: or Tyler Wright or Sally Fitzgibbons, they can earn more
Speaker 5: in one year than I earned in nineteen So it's
Speaker 5: a completely different environment. And it's not just about the money,
Speaker 5: but they're respected, they've got an industry body supporting them,
Speaker 5: they've got a governing body who believes in them, who
Speaker 5: will actually stand up and fight for them versus fighting
Speaker 5: against them, which is what they did to us. The
Speaker 5: men would protest that the waves had got too good
Speaker 5: for us. Back in two thousand and two, they were
Speaker 5: protesting that the waves were too good for us, and
Speaker 5: they stormed the judges tower and they asked the governing
Speaker 5: body to prevent us from being able to surf in
Speaker 5: waves that, in their eyes, were too good for us.
Speaker 5: And we stood up for the first time in a
Speaker 5: very long time and fought against that and we won
Speaker 5: that battle and we got surf that day and I
Speaker 5: won that event. But the guys were glowing about how
Speaker 5: well we served. It's like, no, shit, sure, look it's
Speaker 5: the first time you've had a surfing decent conditions. The
Speaker 5: quality of your performance is definitely dictated to by the
Speaker 5: quality of the conditions in which you're performing in. If
Speaker 5: you're surfing in shit waves all the time, which the
Speaker 5: constant narrative is if it turns to shit, send the
Speaker 5: girls out, then of course we're always going to be
Speaker 5: depicted in that way.
Speaker 3: But also then it's that vicious cycle of like, well,
Speaker 3: you're surfing shit waves, which people don't want to watch,
Speaker 3: so therefore the crowds aren't there, so therefore the investment
Speaker 3: and advertising. You know, I think this is like and
Speaker 3: it's a question I want to throw to you in
Speaker 3: terms of how you view women's sports across the board.
Speaker 3: But there is this ongoing debate comes up every year
Speaker 3: and it's around, well, women's sport shouldn't be paid the
Speaker 3: same because it doesn't get the same amount of views,
Speaker 3: so therefore it doesn't get the same amount of advertising dollars.
Speaker 3: And I guess from majority of people, it's like, well,
Speaker 3: it's chicken before the egg, Like, unless the conditions are
Speaker 3: the same, the equity and the quality of the sport
Speaker 3: won't increase. But what is your view on that when
Speaker 3: someone says to you, oh, but it doesn't get the
Speaker 3: same amount of advertising, so how could they possibly pay
Speaker 3: women the same?
Speaker 2: Well, even in.
Speaker 4: That conversation, this year was the first year that for
Speaker 4: the state of origin that the women were paid the
Speaker 4: same amount as the men. In Queensland, if you played
Speaker 4: for the Queensland team, you got paid the same amount.
Speaker 4: But if you played from New South Wales, the women
Speaker 4: got paid substantially less than the men. And so even
Speaker 4: within the same sport, in the same game, you've got
Speaker 4: this inequality.
Speaker 2: Yeah, disparity, sorry of pay.
Speaker 5: Yeah, well this is this is an issue that goes
Speaker 5: across all industry, not just sport. I mean, we see
Speaker 5: female lawyers earning less, female doctors earning less, female presenters
Speaker 5: earning less. Why is that based on gender? Is it
Speaker 5: because we allow it? I think, you know, there's an
Speaker 5: element of personal accountability and responsibility that needs to fall
Speaker 5: on our shoulders. And look, I talked that very seriously
Speaker 5: when I was competing because my sponsors would question my
Speaker 5: motivation even after winning six consecutive all titles and threaten
Speaker 5: to drop me, whereas they're still going all out to
Speaker 5: support their male team writers. So to answer your question,
Speaker 5: I feel that it's multifaceted. I feel that there's got
Speaker 5: to be a confluence of events that needs to occur.
Speaker 5: We can't just keep putting the onus on the industry
Speaker 5: to pay women more because women need to not so
Speaker 5: much earn it, but they need the opportunity to build
Speaker 5: themselves up to be worthy of it. Because if I
Speaker 5: look at Women's AFL, like the first couple of years,
Speaker 5: it was such a scrappy game, but that was because
Speaker 5: they didn't have the opportunity to play on the right fields.
Speaker 5: They didn't have the support, they didn't have the coaching,
Speaker 5: they didn't have change rooms, they didn't have just the
Speaker 5: comforts to make them feel like they belonged in the game.
Speaker 3: And they couldn't train because they weren't getting paid enough,
Speaker 3: so they had to do other jobs. You know.
Speaker 2: There's all that.
Speaker 5: Yes, there's a lot more to it than just money.
Speaker 5: Though there's a lot more to it, but they need
Speaker 5: to feel like they belong there. They need to be
Speaker 5: given the equal opportunity. My belief is that women do
Speaker 5: deserve to be paid equally, and that argument, especially when
Speaker 5: it comes to Grand Slams in tennis, that women only
Speaker 5: play three sets, So why do they get the same
Speaker 5: prize money as someone that's just played five. Well, there's
Speaker 5: no guarantee that the men's winner will have to play
Speaker 5: five sets, by the way, he could win it in three.
Speaker 5: And secondly, what about the enormous amount of sacrifice and
Speaker 5: commitment and compromise that women have had to endure to
Speaker 5: get to that place and to generate that equal opportunity.
Speaker 5: We need the partners, the sponsorship to see the value
Speaker 5: in the future of it. Sure, right now it might
Speaker 5: not be that valuable, but you have an obligation and
Speaker 5: a duty to make it more valuable than what it is.
Speaker 5: It can't just fall on the players. It has to
Speaker 5: or the participants. It's got to be a multifaceted approach.
Speaker 5: So I reckon the partners have a lot to play
Speaker 5: in it. The broadcasters give us more airtime. We need
Speaker 5: to see our role models. I mean, one of the
Speaker 5: reasons why I was so compelled to become a professional surfer.
Speaker 5: As I used to watch the Coke Class on TV.
Speaker 5: I videotaped it and I would rewind that cassette and
Speaker 5: play it every day. Just being able to watch my
Speaker 5: role models, being able to see that on national television
Speaker 5: helped me create a story around how I can be
Speaker 5: that too. So it comes down to the partners, the broadcasters,
Speaker 5: and then ultimately the talent. Now when I say the talent,
Speaker 5: I mean the people who like me. Don't rely on
Speaker 5: either the broadcasters or the sponsors to dictate who I am.
Speaker 5: I need to know who you are because the more
Speaker 5: I know about you, the more I want to support you.
Speaker 5: The more I connect with you, the more encouraged I'll
Speaker 5: be to come to the games to support you, to
Speaker 5: elevate you, to celebrate you, to share in your successes,
Speaker 5: to console you in your losses. To be a part
Speaker 5: of that journey is what we all want, and that's
Speaker 5: how we connect with each other. So women need to
Speaker 5: tell We need to be able to tell bigger stories,
Speaker 5: better stories, and we need to be given the same
Speaker 5: level of opportunity to do that. As women, we need
Speaker 5: to hold each other accountable, but we also need to
Speaker 5: stand firm in who we are. We need to stand
Speaker 5: firm in our values and what we set the standards
Speaker 5: by what we allow. And I must admit I allowed
Speaker 5: way too much chauvinistic and sexist behavior to be considered normal,
Speaker 5: so much so that I still have this underlying belief
Speaker 5: that men don't respect women in the water. I've been
Speaker 5: able to disprove that by the guys I surf with today,
Speaker 5: but I can still go back to and validate that
Speaker 5: story very quickly if I just want to go down
Speaker 5: surf a manly or narrab.
Speaker 4: If you do go and surf a manly like, I
Speaker 4: can only imagine. I actually have surfed at manly and
Speaker 4: I picture myself paddling onto a wave, and by the
Speaker 4: time I realize that it's Lane Beachley to my co
Speaker 4: to my side, I go, there's no fucking way I'm
Speaker 4: paddling for a wave.
Speaker 2: I am getting out of her way.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I do get my fair share. I must admit
Speaker 5: it takes a lot to slow me down. Lane.
Speaker 4: Life on Cut largely built off of relationships and talking
Speaker 4: about love.
Speaker 2: We did love a bit of love. Chat here do
Speaker 2: love a bit of love.
Speaker 4: And for anyone who doesn't know your husband equally is successful.
Speaker 4: I don't know how you guys are competitive fliers in
Speaker 4: your household.
Speaker 2: She's like, how many trophies do you have? How many
Speaker 2: trophies does Kirk have?
Speaker 5: I don't know because they're locked up somewhere, like he
Speaker 5: never really wanted to display them because he was worried
Speaker 5: that people would feel overwhelmed or overwawed when they walked
Speaker 5: into his presence. And I was like, let's celebrate this shit.
Speaker 5: You were the biggest fan in the world, Kirk. Come on,
Speaker 5: let's celebrate that, so that these are all pluks.
Speaker 4: To give a little bit of context for anyone who
Speaker 4: doesn't know, Kirk, your husband of eighteen years now, eighteen
Speaker 4: nineteen years something.
Speaker 5: Like that, twenty years this year, one of.
Speaker 2: The most successful musicians in the world. He's one of
Speaker 2: the founding members of you Excess.
Speaker 5: Correct, and everyone wants to marry a man that can
Speaker 5: blow a horn, and he's a great sex sophonist.
Speaker 3: Elaine, the thing that I love and I've heard your
Speaker 3: story before about how the two of you met. This
Speaker 3: is a conversation and debate that comes up all the
Speaker 3: time on life on cart and it's whether if you
Speaker 3: don't have any instance spark with someone, Should you go
Speaker 3: on a second date?
Speaker 2: Should you try and see if something grows?
Speaker 3: Now I heard that when you very first met Kirk
Speaker 3: and went on a first date, there wasn't really a
Speaker 3: spark there.
Speaker 5: There was no chemistry, no connection, there was nothing. Quite honestly,
Speaker 5: I didn't even want to go on the date. I
Speaker 5: had no interest in him whatsoever. John Stevens decided that
Speaker 5: we would be a great match, and quite honestly, I
Speaker 5: was much more attracted to John Stevens than I was
Speaker 5: goping Gilly.
Speaker 4: John Stevens from Noiseworks again, yes, in case people don't
Speaker 4: know it, also a musician, so.
Speaker 5: He was frontman of Noiseworks, became the front man of
Speaker 5: in Excess after they tragically lost Michael, and then they
Speaker 5: did some work with Terrence Strint Derby, and then John
Speaker 5: came along and then they've obviously reinvented themselves a couple
Speaker 5: of times since then. But John's been a great mate
Speaker 5: and a big supporter, and there's still an incredible singer
Speaker 5: and musician and performer. He decided that Kirk and I
Speaker 5: would be a great combination. I have no idea how
Speaker 5: or why, because Kirk and I have nothing in common,
Speaker 5: and that continues to be reinforced to day about how
Speaker 5: little we have in common. But we've been together for
Speaker 5: twenty years, we've been married for since the tenth of
Speaker 5: the tenth, so twelve years. And our first date was
Speaker 5: really tenuous. And I promised John that I'd take Kirk
Speaker 5: on a date, so I literally took him ten bin
Speaker 5: bowling at yurself. We always want to start a date
Speaker 5: with a competition, don't we who won? We won one
Speaker 5: game each.
Speaker 3: I think it's always good to do an activity on
Speaker 3: a first date. Then that way you're not tired at
Speaker 3: talking at dinner. There's actually nothing to talk about exactly.
Speaker 5: And so then we walked from Dyiri to dy Beachfront
Speaker 5: to go to a restaurant that friends of mine own,
Speaker 5: and the whole way Kirk decides to talk about surfing,
Speaker 5: and I was like, fuck me, really, the last thing
Speaker 5: I want to think about is and talk about is surfing.
Speaker 5: But you obviously think that's maybe the only thing I
Speaker 5: do know anything about, So okay, I'll honor this conversation.
Speaker 5: And you know, Kirk hates the sun, hates the sand,
Speaker 5: doesn't like owner the beach. Yet we live right by
Speaker 5: one and then when we sit down at dinner, we're
Speaker 5: yawning each other's face. We're really struggling to find conversation.
Speaker 5: I go to the bathroom. I'm thinking, if there's a window,
Speaker 5: I can climb that off. I'm fucking out of here.
Speaker 5: And I'm thinking, if I've done, if I've spent enough
Speaker 5: time in here, maybe I've given him enough time to
Speaker 5: do a runner. And he's literally thinking, well, he's at
Speaker 5: the table. If I put money down, do a runner,
Speaker 5: I think you'll care. And then he realized his car
Speaker 5: was at my house, so we couldn't do that because
Speaker 5: he doesn't really remember where I live. So I came
Speaker 5: out of the bathroom, and I must admit I was
Speaker 5: a little disappointed because he was still sitting at the table. Thought,
Speaker 5: I gave you plenty of time. Yeah, yes, exactly what. Anyway,
Speaker 5: the owner of the restaurant's a good made of mine,
Speaker 5: and he recognized that things weren't going so well, so
Speaker 5: he sat down with us with a fresh bottle of
Speaker 5: his known as lemoncello, and that really loosened everything up,
Speaker 5: like we just let's get out, let's shake off the shackles,
Speaker 5: and let's relax into this and have a real fun
Speaker 5: conversation and we laughed and told classic old stories. And
Speaker 5: then we walked home to my house and I was
Speaker 5: bouncing off the doors of cars, just so drunk, just
Speaker 5: square dancing all the way home. And then we get
Speaker 5: home and then I put on Monster z Inc. Because
Speaker 5: I'm so fucking romantic. I'm like, we're going to sit
Speaker 5: down and watch a kid's film?
Speaker 2: What are we doing? What is this day?
Speaker 5: It's just shit shows what it is? So we watch
Speaker 5: Monsters Inc. And then halfway through it, I'm thinking, Okay,
Speaker 5: surely he's sober enough now to drive home, but if
Speaker 5: he's a good kisser, I'll let him stay. So we
Speaker 5: went out of the balcony and he's still talking. I'm like,
Speaker 5: fucking just shut up and kiss me. So he kissed me.
Speaker 5: I'm like, all right, yeah, you're passed, so right, you
Speaker 5: can stay. And so I made him sleep in his
Speaker 5: clothes and then he woke up alone in my bed
Speaker 5: because I got up at six before dark and windsurfing,
Speaker 5: and he went and he woke up went is this
Speaker 5: what I'm in for? So? Gee, she's been a bit presumptuous.
Speaker 5: Aren't you what you're going to be? For the rest
Speaker 5: of your life.
Speaker 2: As it turns out.
Speaker 4: Now I am assuming he wakes up most mornings and
Speaker 4: you're not in bed and he's alone.
Speaker 2: That's nothing's changed.
Speaker 5: No, that's changed a lot because I don't like getting
Speaker 5: up early, especially in winter. But it's too cold and
Speaker 5: all the briefcase bandits and the school kids are in
Speaker 5: the water. So I like to get up around seven,
Speaker 5: go surfing around eight to eight birdie. That way, it's
Speaker 5: a changeover briefcase Bandit's gone, the work kids gone to school,
Speaker 5: have it to myself. So yeah, we've found our mojo,
Speaker 5: We've found our routine that serves us. Really a kirks
Speaker 5: and real cuddler. He's very, very nurturing, very affectionate, lovesy
Speaker 5: snaggles and cardles.
Speaker 2: He's a physical touch guy.
Speaker 5: That's definitely one of his love languages, his physical touch. Yeah,
Speaker 5: so I'm not allowed to get out of bed when
Speaker 5: it's dark unless it's absolutely necessary.
Speaker 3: Lane, you are the founder of Awake Academy. And now,
Speaker 3: what it says on the website is that it provides
Speaker 3: self empowerment and helps people detach from fear and take
Speaker 3: control and design a life they love.
Speaker 5: No bullshit, transformation.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and I love this idea of detaching from fear.
Speaker 3: Why was this foundation so important to you?
Speaker 5: So before COVID, I had decided that it was time
Speaker 5: to write another book, and I really wanted to condense
Speaker 5: all the life lessons that I've learned. So my biography
Speaker 5: is obviously it's a biography, it's you know, it's a
Speaker 5: historical reference of the things that I've been through. But
Speaker 5: it really didn't encapsulate all of the really deep, fundamental,
Speaker 5: valuable life lessons that are really applicable to our day
Speaker 5: to day lives. So I wasn't able to really incorporate
Speaker 5: that into my book, into Beneath the Waves. So I
Speaker 5: thought it's time to write another book, and I'm going
Speaker 5: to call it Above the Waves since the first one
Speaker 5: was Beneath the Waves.
Speaker 2: Great sequel, I see where you did that.
Speaker 5: So I decided to put it into like a PowerPoint
Speaker 5: keynote format and I rode tested it at my next
Speaker 5: One of my next keynotes was some of the things
Speaker 5: and and a lot of it resonated a bit, you know,
Speaker 5: fell flat, and I was like, Okay, I'll just keep
Speaker 5: working on it. And then I decided that I was
Speaker 5: going to host a public workshop, and it was the
Speaker 5: first time I'd ever asked people to come and pay
Speaker 5: to hear from me, as opposed to being paid to
Speaker 5: go and speak to others. And the self imposed the
Speaker 5: self imposter, you know, the imposter syndrome sparked up was
Speaker 5: like I'm not smart enough that I'm not deserving of this,
Speaker 5: I'm not worthy to share this information, Like is there
Speaker 5: really any value in it? Anyway? People paid, people showed up,
Speaker 5: and that gave me the confidence to believe that actually,
Speaker 5: my content is of value and is of worth and
Speaker 5: does need to be shared. And then my girlfriend, Tess,
Speaker 5: who's now my business partner, she helped me do like
Speaker 5: a snapshot, you know how retailers do stock takes to
Speaker 5: work out what's working and what's not, get rid of
Speaker 5: stuff that isn't. She did that with me. I did
Speaker 5: a stock take on my life, like what's working, what's not?
Speaker 5: How sustainable is my current lifestyle. I'm talking about living
Speaker 5: in a well, I'm talking I'm teaching people how to
Speaker 5: achieve sustained success, and yet it's unsustainable. And I realized
Speaker 5: I had fallen back into that fear mentality that win
Speaker 5: it all costs mentality, that ferocious tiger shark, the one
Speaker 5: that must achieve it all costs. My body was broken,
Speaker 5: my relationship with my husband was strained, but I just
Speaker 5: kept doing, doing, doing, and she went, whoa wait, wait,
Speaker 5: how sustainable is this? And I went, no, not for ari.
Speaker 5: She's like, do you want to write another book? I
Speaker 5: said no, not really. Writing's not my jam. I've paid
Speaker 5: for a write like an editor, and I'm paying her
Speaker 5: a shit tone and she's like, ah, you sending me anything.
Speaker 5: I'm like, not, haven't written in the last two months?
Speaker 5: Like maybe we should stop doing this. You're right, I'm
Speaker 5: throwing money away. And so she said, well, what about
Speaker 5: doing a course like building a course? I said, that
Speaker 5: lights me up, and then COVID hit and I spent
Speaker 5: the next six months in front of this little computer
Speaker 5: that I'm talking to you on, typing out a course
Speaker 5: called Own Your Truth that's housed on the Awake Academy
Speaker 5: platform to help people own their shit like wake Up,
Speaker 5: own your Shit, Trust in Love. Because a lot of
Speaker 5: us are going through life on default mode. We're living
Speaker 5: life by default. This course helps you live it by design.
Speaker 5: So we're all about cultivating connection, growth, and happiness. In humanity,
Speaker 5: and everyone that's done this course has walked away feeling
Speaker 5: more centered, connected and confident. And that's all I really
Speaker 5: want to do. I really wanted to harness what I've
Speaker 5: learned over the last forty years turn it into a
Speaker 5: self paced online course that people can go through it
Speaker 5: their own time and their own pace and take bits
Speaker 5: from it that they can apply to make them feel
Speaker 5: happier and healthier. It's enabled me to broaden my impact.
Speaker 5: It's enabled me to deliver such profound content without me
Speaker 5: having to be there because it's all done through video
Speaker 5: and workbook. And it's also I've been able to turn
Speaker 5: it into a corporate model where I've been able to
Speaker 5: scale it into corporate organizations and for ninety minutes a
Speaker 5: week for four weeks, I can literally transform your team
Speaker 5: and your workforce to make them feeling more sender, connected,
Speaker 5: and confidence. So it's something I'm very proud of and
Speaker 5: something that's enabled me to be a better version of me.
Speaker 5: And it actually helped me anchor my why because we
Speaker 5: all need to know our why. It's what helps us
Speaker 5: get up, especially on the days when we don't feel
Speaker 5: like it, and my why is awakening others awakens me.
Speaker 3: Lane, thank you so much for doing the pod today.
Speaker 3: It's been an absolute joy speaking to you. Thank you
Speaker 3: for being so open and sharing so much of your
Speaker 3: story but also so much of where you're at now.
Speaker 3: It's truly been a pleasure. And can you please tell
Speaker 3: everyone where they can find you?
Speaker 5: Your Instagram so they can go onto Awake Academy dot
Speaker 5: com dot au. They can also find me on LinkedIn,
Speaker 5: which is Laane Beachley or Instagram Blaine Beachley or Twitter
Speaker 5: Lane Seabeachley. I think it's Twitter.
Speaker 2: It's pretty easy to find It's what we're saying.
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, it's really not hard to find me.
Speaker 2: Just Google, Yeah, just google me.
Speaker 5: You probably find my phone number, but really easy to
Speaker 5: find me. And the majority of my content is delivered
Speaker 5: through LinkedIn and Instagram, so just follow me there and
Speaker 5: then come and find me Awake Academy.
Speaker 2: Thank you so much to your timeline.
Speaker 5: Thank you. Girls. Love it to chat all right.
Speaker 3: You know that we never finished an episode without our
Speaker 3: suck and our sweet, our highlight and our low light
Speaker 3: of each and every week. Producer, Keisha, you can go first,
Speaker 3: what has been you said?
Speaker 2: You have a funny one. What has been your suck.
Speaker 4: So my suck is that I mean you are kind
Speaker 4: of aware of it. Is that I was really sick
Speaker 4: last week and it was the first time in years
Speaker 4: that I can remember. I had been like fully knocked
Speaker 4: on my.
Speaker 2: Ass for quite a few days. Have you had COVID yet?
Speaker 2: I don't know. I don't think so had all the
Speaker 2: symptoms that didn't test. No, don't talk about these things.
Speaker 2: I didn't test.
Speaker 4: I just think that it would be really hard for
Speaker 4: me to live the lifestyle that I do and not
Speaker 4: have had it. So I'm assuming that I've had it
Speaker 4: and just been completely asymptomatic.
Speaker 2: So it was a week that it like it really
Speaker 2: rattled me.
Speaker 4: And as it turns out, I've been to the doctors
Speaker 4: and they think that I've picked up an amoeba in Indonesia.
Speaker 2: What's an amoeba?
Speaker 4: It's a parasite, right, Yeah, So they think that that's
Speaker 4: what's going on, and the way that they test that.
Speaker 4: And this is where the funny part comes in because
Speaker 4: it's something that I've never had to do before. And
Speaker 4: there are moments in your life where like you're really
Speaker 4: humbled by your existence, and one every time I get
Speaker 4: a perhaps there is Yeah, this is of the same level,
Speaker 4: maybe worse.
Speaker 2: For the first time, I had to do a poop scoop.
Speaker 4: And I had to do a eco sample, which involves
Speaker 4: you pooping onto a little leg picture like a paper bag,
Speaker 4: but they're dissolvable, so you line the toilet with this
Speaker 4: paper bag.
Speaker 2: Mouth is wide open. I am in shock that we
Speaker 2: got here.
Speaker 4: You go to the bathroom and then you have to
Speaker 4: get the little scoopy scoop and collect your own shit
Speaker 4: into a little tube.
Speaker 2: And then you know what's worse, No, I don't want to.
Speaker 4: Know, is that you have to go back to the
Speaker 4: place and you are walking around with a bag of
Speaker 4: your own until you get a pathology place and drop
Speaker 4: it off in the little collection sample plant.
Speaker 2: Yeah reallymble humbolizing? Is that a word?
Speaker 4: I probably not, certainly not one of those moments that
Speaker 4: I thought, Wow, no matter how how much you think
Speaker 4: you've matured and progressed in your life, no matter the
Speaker 4: successes you have, there's always a poop of scoop that
Speaker 4: can bring you back down.
Speaker 2: No matter what.
Speaker 4: Fame and fortune you read in life, You've still got
Speaker 4: to do your own poop scoop. Like even Beyonce she's
Speaker 4: not getting her assistant to do that.
Speaker 3: I reckon beyond a nah, I reckon Beyonce with an amba,
Speaker 3: there'd be someone there to poop the scoop, to scoop
Speaker 3: the poop.
Speaker 2: So that was my suck. Wow.
Speaker 3: Can I tell you when I was in India, when
Speaker 3: I was like very young, I went to India. I've
Speaker 3: got a terrible gut problem. I ended up in hospital
Speaker 3: and I'll never forget when the guy was like, we
Speaker 3: need a sample, and I was like, you don't want that,
Speaker 3: and I did it and I handed it to him
Speaker 3: and he said, no, not a your own sample, a
Speaker 3: still sample.
Speaker 2: And I was like, that's what we're working with. That's
Speaker 2: where we're at. Pal oh stu is the word I
Speaker 2: should have been news. That's what that is.
Speaker 4: But it is a pretty obvious suck to my existence,
Speaker 4: not just my week.
Speaker 3: Okay, Well, I'm very sorry that you brought home more
Speaker 3: than you bargained for from Indonesia, and I hope that
Speaker 3: you send it back very soon.
Speaker 2: Thank you, thank you. I do she what is your sweet?
Speaker 4: My sweet for the week is that as an amoeba
Speaker 4: is not contagious. I was allowed back out into the
Speaker 4: wild and some of my friends from high school came
Speaker 4: to Sydney for the weekend, came for one of the
Speaker 4: girl's birthdays, and we got to spend all this time
Speaker 4: together and like, they're friends that I don't really get
Speaker 4: to spend that much time with regularly, and we ended
Speaker 4: up doing some really cool stuff, like we went to
Speaker 4: some awesome restaurants and we went to the Mulan Route.
Speaker 3: I am a sheesh. If you guys haven't seen the
Speaker 3: Mulin Rouge, I am. I was like in fucking in love.
Speaker 3: I can't even find words.
Speaker 2: I was absolutely sick on it. Produced a Kasha not
Speaker 2: so much. She was like, Eh, take it or leave it.
Speaker 4: No that I wouldn't say that, but but I will
Speaker 4: admit I'm a massive, massive fan of the theater.
Speaker 2: So I've been to musicals and I loved it. See
Speaker 2: I loved it at.
Speaker 4: A time where like throughout COVID and artists, particularly like
Speaker 4: stage performers went through the absolute ringer. And I've got
Speaker 4: a couple of friends that are in that industry, and
Speaker 4: I kind of know how hard it has been for
Speaker 4: them too, because you know, they because we got in
Speaker 4: and out of lockdown, they kind of came out and
Speaker 4: the productions were back on and then they'd be forced
Speaker 4: out of the productions again, and I know that they're
Speaker 4: really sough with people kind of being like, I can't
Speaker 4: do this anymore, It's not sustainable enough. And so being
Speaker 4: back in the theater again was fucking great.
Speaker 3: So what Keisha's saying is that she doesn't want to
Speaker 3: say anything negative because she wants you to all go
Speaker 3: and buy Mullin Rooge tickets. But honestly, I think just
Speaker 3: you know what, I actually would say, it wasn't the
Speaker 3: best show I've ever seen.
Speaker 2: However, getting to go and see shows is really great.
Speaker 4: It's like I forgot that newfound of appreciation of it
Speaker 4: because we missed out on it for so long, And
Speaker 4: so are we looking like?
Speaker 2: There are a lot of shows on that are not
Speaker 2: as big as the Muln Route.
Speaker 3: Speaking of shows, also, there is a live show that
Speaker 3: you should have gone book tickets to.
Speaker 2: I think it's called Life on Cut.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yes, it is at the cityous Atole All in Sydney,
Speaker 3: one thousand, two hundred seats. There's still some left like
Speaker 3: go by tickets. It's gonna be the best fucking show.
Speaker 2: That'll be my speak for that week, So what is
Speaker 2: your suck?
Speaker 3: So my suck for the week, unfortunately, also centers around Pooh,
Speaker 3: but slightly different.
Speaker 2: So we went away for a wedding.
Speaker 3: My mum and actually a couple of my really good
Speaker 3: friends took care of the girls. But then on the
Speaker 3: day that we were arriving back, my and my stepdad Neil,
Speaker 3: came up and they took the kids, and so there
Speaker 3: was a lot of people in a very small house.
Speaker 3: My sister and my nephew had also come over, and
Speaker 3: my niece, so there was like seven people.
Speaker 2: Eight people. I can't get crazy.
Speaker 3: There was a lot of people in the house, a
Speaker 3: lot of yelling, a lot of stuff happening, And I
Speaker 3: was like, can we just put the kids outside, like,
Speaker 3: put the four kids outside, just to try and bring
Speaker 3: this energy down a little bit.
Speaker 2: So we did.
Speaker 3: We chucked the kids outside. The energy came down and.
Speaker 2: Shut the door, locked the door.
Speaker 3: Unfortunately, we left the door open. That was the problem.
Speaker 3: Left the door open, pushed the kids outside. I was like, cool,
Speaker 3: the energy was coming down. Everyone was feeling better for it.
Speaker 3: The kids were coming back and forth inside and outside.
Speaker 3: Molly was making potions and then I could smell something
Speaker 3: and I was like, what the what stinks?
Speaker 2: Something in our house stinks.
Speaker 3: Then I realized that three of the four children had
Speaker 3: walked through dog shit and had been walking it through
Speaker 3: my house, just in and out and in and out. Ummy,
Speaker 3: looks this potion in and out.
Speaker 4: And there was a thoroughfare of dog shit footsteps all
Speaker 4: the way down the hallway. Have you ever seen that
Speaker 4: picture that went viral of the you know, the robot
Speaker 4: vacuum that went through the dog shit. I'm picturing that
Speaker 4: but in children form, like back and forth, back and forth.
Speaker 3: That is my idea of a horror story because so
Speaker 3: many people send it to me because I'm so obsessed
Speaker 3: with my robot vauum cleaner, which if you call me
Speaker 3: an Instagram.
Speaker 4: Sweet, is it the sweet that you just got the
Speaker 4: robot vacuum ount to clean up where the kids?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 3: Because I see, look, it's too technical. You can't actually
Speaker 3: just set a roomba across dog shit because it won't
Speaker 3: actually clean up the dog shit or just mop up.
Speaker 3: It'll just put dog poo on the pads and then
Speaker 3: put those pads all around the house.
Speaker 4: Ah, because it doesn't change the pads. Right, Okay, this
Speaker 4: is a lot about robot vackum. I think you know
Speaker 4: what it needs to become more intelligent. It's not up
Speaker 4: to status yet.
Speaker 2: I agree wholeheartedly. Okay.
Speaker 3: Most sweet for the week though, is that we went
Speaker 3: to a wedding. We went to Brisbane. We got to
Speaker 3: see all of MAT's family. There's like the best, lovely,
Speaker 3: wonderful people. I forced Matt and to dancing with me,
Speaker 3: and then I also convinced him to have sex with me,
Speaker 3: not against his will. He was very willing, just a
Speaker 3: little bit drunk, and then that was it. We had
Speaker 3: a really it was our first night ever away from
Speaker 3: the kids together. We have never ever, ever Matt and
Speaker 3: I had a night away from the children together. There's
Speaker 3: always been one of us or the other, but never
Speaker 3: two people away from the children entirely.
Speaker 2: How did that fit? Will you be anxious? Freeing? It
Speaker 2: was good like you felt good? Yes, I will do
Speaker 2: it again. Great, all right? You will not be putting
Speaker 2: them in my care I know ever. Anyway, guys, that
Speaker 2: is it from us.
Speaker 3: Britt will be back on Thursday for our ask Guncut
Speaker 3: episode produce.
Speaker 2: Akeisha, thank you.
Speaker 3: So much for jumping in for filling in the very
Speaker 3: big boots of Brittany Hockley. I mean her feet, aren't
Speaker 3: that be but for filling in her shoes. And if
Speaker 3: you guys have loved the episode, you know where to
Speaker 3: find us. You can jump on Instagram at Life on
Speaker 3: Cut podcast, so you can join us in the Facebook
Speaker 3: discussion group, and you can also find us on TikTok
Speaker 3: because that's what we do now. We tick and we
Speaker 3: talk thirty six year old women millenniums that we are.
Speaker 4: Do you see that meme posted which is something that
Speaker 4: we actually do do on Instagram a lot, and it said,
Speaker 4: oh for people over thirty discussing TikTok And it's a
Speaker 4: picture of the women from Golden Girls sitting around at table.
Speaker 2: That's us talking about TikTok.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and it's at Life on Cup podcast. We have
Speaker 3: three thy eight hundred follow us.
Speaker 2: That's not bad.
Speaker 4: Go join get amongst it's a pretty exclusive little collection
Speaker 4: and if you want to get tickets to the live show,
Speaker 4: you can find the details.
Speaker 2: Where can they find it?
Speaker 5: Keys?
Speaker 2: They can find them in our bio and on our website.
Speaker 4: Yes, they're on the website by for detail. Super organized.
Speaker 4: That's why that's why you've got me here.
Speaker 3: You can find tickets to the live show on our
Speaker 3: Instagram bio or on the website and go buy tickets.
Speaker 3: It's in Sydney, it's on the twelfth of October. It's
Speaker 3: going to be so much fun and we can't wait
Speaker 3: to see you all.
Speaker 2: And you know the drill, Tell your mom, tell you dad,
Speaker 2: tell you don't tell you this, you won't tell you dad.
Speaker 2: Hey mom, tell your
Speaker 4: Dad, tell your dog to tell your friends and shared a
Speaker 4: love because very love that