Speaker 1: The Rise and Conquer Podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of
Speaker 1: the land which this episode is being recorded, the Yugen
Speaker 1: Bear region. We further acknowledge country throughout Australia and their
Speaker 1: connections to land, sea and community. We pay our respect
Speaker 1: to their elders past and present and extend that respect
Speaker 1: to all Aboriginal and terrest Rate Islander peoples today. Hello
Speaker 1: and welcome back to the Rise and Conquer Podcasts.
Speaker 2: This is the podcast for ordinary.
Speaker 1: People who want to do extraordinary things. If your love
Speaker 1: language is touched, you need to know how to like
Speaker 1: sort that out, yes, because you can't always you know, rely,
Speaker 1: I just think that's on the od vibrator.
Speaker 2: Hello and welcome back to the Rise and Conker Podcast.
Speaker 1: It is your host, Georgie Stephenson and guys, I'm back
Speaker 1: with another Geez hotline. These other episodes where you send
Speaker 1: in your life dilemmas and I provide you with my
Speaker 1: very young qualified two cents on the situation, and of
Speaker 1: course a tea is joining us. So guys, disclaimer, this
Speaker 1: episode is so chaotic. We went completely rogue.
Speaker 2: It's more than last time.
Speaker 1: We say this every time and then we just keep
Speaker 1: topping it and it's a bit spicy. I don't know
Speaker 1: how I feel about it, to be honest, I spoke
Speaker 1: to a Tea and Ellie and I'm like, do we
Speaker 1: just cut it chunk out? Yeah, it's a bit of appropriate,
Speaker 1: But as I say in it, we are grown ass
Speaker 1: women a TIA and we can talk about these things.
Speaker 1: Don't get me wrong, I will talk about these things
Speaker 1: all day, every.
Speaker 2: Day with you know friends.
Speaker 1: Yes, I guess I'm just conscious because we do get
Speaker 1: a bit spicy. We talk about sex life and when
Speaker 1: I lost my virginity, and like, I don't mean to
Speaker 1: be a prude because I'm really not in person. But
Speaker 1: then I remember that thousands of people listen to this,
Speaker 1: and I also don't know who listens to this, and
Speaker 1: I also know my mom and family members listen to this.
Speaker 1: So I'm gonna have to send my mum a message
Speaker 1: and just be like, look, dead's not the yep for you,
Speaker 1: not at all, not at all, but also happy to
Speaker 1: talk about it because.
Speaker 2: We are grown ass women ATIA.
Speaker 1: We are we are, So I'm sorry if we get
Speaker 1: a bit ooh, this is so inappropriate, But I was
Speaker 1: a little bit embarrassed, But definitely listen to this one
Speaker 1: with earphones and if you're in a public place. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's a great recommendation. A tea recommendation for the week.
Speaker 1: Mine is to Actually I've been doing it bit by
Speaker 1: bit every day. I don't I try not to spend
Speaker 1: too much time on it. But cleanse your Instagram following.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, yes, I love a good cleanse. Yeah, because
Speaker 2: I actually saw someone post that they went and unfollowed
Speaker 2: anyone who they followed that followed Andrew Tate.
Speaker 1: Ah love and we love that.
Speaker 2: Yes, we hate Andrew, we do.
Speaker 1: We could do a whole episode of that. Let us
Speaker 1: know if you want that. Yeah.
Speaker 2: But yeah, it's like, how would you find that out?
Speaker 2: You just click on his profile and you can. It'll
Speaker 2: show you who follows him that you follow Oh my god. Yeah.
Speaker 2: And I saw a few people's names and I was like,
Speaker 2: that doesn't seem right. So I actually DM them and
Speaker 2: I'm like, oh, why you following? I love you so much?
Speaker 2: You should unfollow him? And they're like because it was
Speaker 2: guys and yeah no, and they said, no, I don't
Speaker 2: believe any of it. It's just funny to watch because
Speaker 2: he's so crazy, and I'm like don't just don't give
Speaker 2: him that attention.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's an excuse. I do not accept that. Did
Speaker 1: you then go on and follow those people? Well, they
Speaker 1: unfollowed him. I've read them oh good, oh good, or good?
Speaker 2: But yeah, I am followed everyone I followed that followed him,
Speaker 2: And then it just got me thinking like, hey, let
Speaker 2: me cleanse it. And Instagram actually shows you in your
Speaker 2: following section. Now you're least interacting. So that's where I went,
Speaker 2: and I just do five minutes of that every day
Speaker 2: to just check. I love that. It's like a spring
Speaker 2: clean vibes.
Speaker 1: Yeah. My recommendation for the week is if you have
Speaker 1: me on socials, I'm doing a hot girl reset.
Speaker 2: I just love it.
Speaker 1: I just want to disclaim hot girl does not mean
Speaker 1: I think I'm a hotel because I like put this
Speaker 1: on my stories and Tim's like, why do you keep
Speaker 1: calling yourself a hot girl? And I was like, it's
Speaker 1: a TikTok trend. It doesn't actually mean I think I'm
Speaker 1: a hot girl. A hot girl like prioritizes herself and
Speaker 1: her self care and her healthy going on a hot
Speaker 1: girl walk, it doesn't necessarily He was like, I just
Speaker 1: don't think everyone knows this so concerning, Like he genuinely
Speaker 1: gets embarrassed for me.
Speaker 2: Sometimes I think everyone knows it except.
Speaker 1: It okay, good because I was like, oh gosh, oh gosh,
Speaker 1: So guys, I've been on a hot girl reset where basically,
Speaker 1: you know, I've come off the back of some really
Speaker 1: big launches, some really exciting stuff. And when my work
Speaker 1: life ramps up, because I'm so strict with my boundaries
Speaker 1: with Ivy, the thing that falls is my self care,
Speaker 1: my healthy habits, and my friends.
Speaker 2: I love your friends. So I just like.
Speaker 1: Wanted to do a little challenge for myself and I
Speaker 1: wanted to put on Instagram and also I'm telling you
Speaker 1: guys now here, just to keep myself accountable, just bed
Speaker 1: tiny things. And it's like these are also things that
Speaker 1: it's not restrictive. It's let's just put these healthy habits
Speaker 1: back in there, because I know myself habits are aren't
Speaker 1: hard once you have created them, if that makes sense.
Speaker 1: They just become routine. It just becomes what you've done.
Speaker 1: So I was like, I just need to like stick
Speaker 1: to these things for a week. It's going to become
Speaker 1: easy and I'll get back into routine. And so my
Speaker 1: little hot girl habits were increase my veggies. That was
Speaker 1: important because it was just like proteins and carbs for
Speaker 1: comfort food, comfort food and just quick and easy. And
Speaker 1: because it's a bit cold, I was off salad, but
Speaker 1: then vegetables it take so long to cook, so literally
Speaker 1: really fall enough. So just increasing our veggies. We know
Speaker 1: good few fiber vitamins and minerals. I wanted to increase
Speaker 1: my water intake, so at least two leads a day,
Speaker 1: which I'm doing with my fun little water bottle. I've
Speaker 1: got that you cannot see ten minutes of meditation and journaling.
Speaker 1: I do that already, but just you know, want to
Speaker 1: put that in their daily movement again. I do that already.
Speaker 1: Limit caffeine.
Speaker 2: I love that one. So she always has.
Speaker 1: Two coffees a day. You know the sitier, and I
Speaker 1: just know it's not a good friend.
Speaker 2: I love it.
Speaker 1: I love it so much, So to one coffee, like,
Speaker 1: let's not be dramatic and yeah, you don't have cut
Speaker 1: it out, no, So one coffee a day, one coffee
Speaker 1: at one pre workout. And then also my collagen, so
Speaker 1: I don't talk about collagen a lot bit. Collagen is
Speaker 1: like my ride or die product that I took while
Speaker 1: I was pregnant and also post partum, just to because
Speaker 1: baby takes all your collagen. Oh yeah, Like I actually
Speaker 1: had my GP be like, yeah, take collagen while you're pregnant,
Speaker 1: because baby just takes it all. That's why they say
Speaker 1: like girls take your beauty and stuff like that.
Speaker 2: Oh, because they're sucking all your collagen. Now, yeah, they
Speaker 2: literally take your collagen.
Speaker 1: So I was really big on that and I just
Speaker 1: felt like it really helped. And the last month I
Speaker 1: just have been so lazy of my daily collagen and
Speaker 1: I've noticed my skin and my hair and nail had
Speaker 1: nail sorry, just like I don't know, feeling a bit gross,
Speaker 1: feeling a bit like, eh, not shiny, not fun. So
Speaker 1: sticking to the collagen and obviously a little sneaky plug
Speaker 1: there is with my veggie intake using my n H
Speaker 1: greens and then also with limiting caffeine, we have a
Speaker 1: stim free pre workout, so it has been you know, easier.
Speaker 2: Do you have collagen that's very nice? Oh?
Speaker 1: Yes, of course, the collagen, the pure collagen. It's just tasteless.
Speaker 2: But yeah, I've just been.
Speaker 1: Doing a Hot Girl reset and it is day five
Speaker 1: and I've like stuck to it and I feel really
Speaker 1: good and I think it's you know, it may even
Speaker 1: be place ebo, but just sticking to some routines and
Speaker 1: like proving to yourself and knowing that you're creating good
Speaker 1: habits has been really nice.
Speaker 2: I love that, all.
Speaker 1: Right, guys, without further ado. Oh also sorry, Like the
Speaker 1: topics are we talk about love languages, we talk about.
Speaker 2: What else manifesting, like big things verse little.
Speaker 1: Things, big things versus little things and vibrators.
Speaker 2: No, look, you on to love it. Let's get straight
Speaker 2: into it. So our first hotline question, Georgie, I saw
Speaker 2: you post a story about your love language being touch
Speaker 2: and you had just gotten a ninety minute massage. I
Speaker 2: was just wondering if things like this really fill up
Speaker 2: your love language cup because mine is also majorly touched,
Speaker 2: and my partner is a very physically unaffectionate person, so
Speaker 2: I often feel largely lacking in that portion of my needs.
Speaker 1: Oh, I love this question too, she says every question.
Speaker 2: Yes, these are the best questions ever. This is why
Speaker 2: we chose some. I love this question.
Speaker 1: So my love language definitely touch, but also quality time.
Speaker 2: Yeah, both of them up there. It honestly depends on
Speaker 2: the mood which one is more important. Yeah, but I've
Speaker 2: asked Tim's also.
Speaker 1: His is definitely quality time, and I think acts of
Speaker 1: service okay, which I'm horrible at doing access, which is
Speaker 1: probably why it's his. Definitely if your love language is touch.
Speaker 1: And so I have every second week I have an
Speaker 1: acupuncture plus massage appointment.
Speaker 2: I love that. I actually have one today, very.
Speaker 1: Excited, and it's just like it's booked in every two weeks,
Speaker 1: so it's a reoccurring appointment. And I started getting acupuncture
Speaker 1: when I was trying to conceive, and then I just
Speaker 1: found this acupunctress who like she also does acupuncture and
Speaker 1: then like kind of finishes off with a sneaky little
Speaker 1: massage love and I was like, this is amazing. That's
Speaker 1: ever Yeah, And I found that that just like filled
Speaker 1: up my cup. And so then I started really seeking
Speaker 1: out regular massage places. And so the big thing with
Speaker 1: the massage places is it has to be for me,
Speaker 1: someone who's like a bit woo woo and spiritual, so
Speaker 1: someone can hold space for me and talk about not energetics.
Speaker 1: But it's not like I go to a massage place, you.
Speaker 2: Know, weird music playing, Yeah, or like you.
Speaker 1: Get a different person, like my massage place is I've
Speaker 1: found I go to the exact same person.
Speaker 2: I know who I'm getting.
Speaker 1: I love her energy, I'm I feel really safe in
Speaker 1: that environment, and I like how she massages. So it's
Speaker 1: an experience, yeah, and it really fills up my cup.
Speaker 1: So I think definitely, like if your love language is touch,
Speaker 1: you're going to enjoy it. It might just be about
Speaker 1: finding like the right messuse. And I think also some
Speaker 1: people just are less affectionate. So if so with your partner,
Speaker 1: like it is just going to be a little bit
Speaker 1: harder if your love language is super like I want
Speaker 1: to be affectionate. I want to be touched all the time.
Speaker 1: I think it's definitely a conversation that you have with him. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but I think do what I do, go get a message.
Speaker 1: Tim's actually a very affectionate person, but like for me,
Speaker 1: I get away from me.
Speaker 2: My love likeguage is not touch right now. My love
Speaker 2: language is touched, but only with my business.
Speaker 1: But that's what I mean as finding different ways to
Speaker 1: inject that in your life, I think is so crucial.
Speaker 2: I love that idea and just I've never thought about
Speaker 2: it like that.
Speaker 1: And so quality of time too is I find obviously
Speaker 1: quality time with Tim, but quality time with myself, Oh
Speaker 1: my god, is like this is me.
Speaker 2: Literally, I need at least two to three hours by
Speaker 2: myself a week, at least at least oh gosh, Like
Speaker 2: Wednesday is my favorite day because I'm at home for
Speaker 2: beauty and no one else is at home, so I
Speaker 2: have the entire house till like five pm. Oh my god,
Speaker 2: I love.
Speaker 1: Yeah, when you're living at home and having the entire
Speaker 1: house to yourself is just like a dream. Literally, I
Speaker 1: come from a family of four kids, and anytime I
Speaker 1: would be hurt myself, I'm like, oh my god, this
Speaker 1: house is so big. Literally, but that's like something we do,
Speaker 1: especially since IVY is. I tell Tim like I just
Speaker 1: need a couple of hours. I'll go get a message,
Speaker 1: I'll go to the.
Speaker 2: Beach and journal.
Speaker 1: And even though a lot of people like I just
Speaker 1: don't have the time, it's like you make the time absolutely.
Speaker 1: And I think knowing your love language is so a
Speaker 1: big thing that she said is like he doesn't meet
Speaker 1: my needs, meeting your own needs yes, So then anything
Speaker 1: on top is like a little bonus.
Speaker 2: Yes. I love that, And just knowing your love language
Speaker 2: so that you can do that. Yeah, because what's the
Speaker 2: love language book? Oh, I don't know that. Have you
Speaker 2: never read the book? No, I've just read up a
Speaker 2: lot about it. But the five love Languages how to
Speaker 2: express heartfelt commitment to your mate. That is why I've
Speaker 2: not read this book.
Speaker 1: He is like, cannot relate, not applicable, but just think
Speaker 1: of yourself.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but I think it's very.
Speaker 1: Valuable knowing your love language, oh absolutely, and knowing how
Speaker 1: to meet your own needs. Also, this is going to
Speaker 1: be a bit crazy, and I'm just gonna go.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna go.
Speaker 1: Tmis like, oh my god.
Speaker 2: So this person too.
Speaker 1: If your love language is touch, you've got it and
Speaker 1: you've got a partner. I think I was gonna say
Speaker 1: it for that stop myself. I think this person also,
Speaker 1: you've got to learn how to satisfy yourself sexually.
Speaker 2: Dying.
Speaker 1: So inappropriate for me as a boss to be talking about.
Speaker 2: This, but it's for the podcast.
Speaker 1: Good. I agree.
Speaker 2: I think, especially.
Speaker 1: If your love language is touch, you need to know
Speaker 1: how to like sort that out, yes, because you can't
Speaker 1: always you know, rely, but yeah, that's just a little tidy.
Speaker 1: I just think that's something a vibrator.
Speaker 2: What I can't give you recommend out please Jaming, I
Speaker 2: will die.
Speaker 1: Don't cut that out of me. I can give you
Speaker 1: Viboda recommendations if you want.
Speaker 2: Not your tea out of the audience.
Speaker 1: A tears, Mom, I'm sorry.
Speaker 2: We are fucking grown women. A tear.
Speaker 1: Real about thirty. For God's sake, I think just going
Speaker 1: off that A tear in saying that I am someone
Speaker 1: like in my twenties. It has only been my later
Speaker 1: twenties that I have like figured it out and realized
Speaker 1: how I don't want to say the word freeing, but
Speaker 1: how empowering and important it is to know your own body. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I didn't respond to Jamie. Can you move the Gold
Speaker 1: Coast so we can have these discuptions because Tea just
Speaker 1: doesn't respond.
Speaker 2: No, I totally agree. It is very important, even if
Speaker 2: it's down to just checking your breasts next. I seem
Speaker 2: to be incredibly good at manifesting little things, things that
Speaker 2: are only a passing thought of that'd be nice. However,
Speaker 2: I seem to be stagnant on my bigger dreams or
Speaker 2: things that I really want and can't seem to manifest
Speaker 2: them in the same way. I've tried breaking down into
Speaker 2: smaller steps, but can't seem to crack my big goals,
Speaker 2: some of which I've had for years. Now, what do
Speaker 2: you think I should do? Ps og r and Z
Speaker 2: project gal I joined round one and the minute it
Speaker 2: opened and I loved it so sweet. I love my
Speaker 2: rn C project. Bam, this is a good question. It's like,
Speaker 2: I think it's very relatable.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so my initial thing that comes up here is
Speaker 1: if you find it easy to manifest smaller things rather
Speaker 1: than like bigger things, I guess my initial gut reaction is.
Speaker 2: For the bigger things, you need to feel worthy of them. Yes,
Speaker 2: is that what you were thinking? That's exactly what I
Speaker 2: was going to say. Do you feel worthy of the
Speaker 2: big thing? Exactly?
Speaker 1: Because it's actually quite funny. I'm actually the opposite where
Speaker 1: I struggle to manifest smaller things.
Speaker 2: Must be nice, as I say, first problems.
Speaker 1: Poor me. But even sometimes like manifesting a car park,
Speaker 1: that's a small thing. And sometimes I'll be on the
Speaker 1: way somewhere and I'll be like, oh, I really need
Speaker 1: a car park out front, because like I haven't got
Speaker 1: enough time, blah blah blah. But then like oh, we're
Speaker 1: getting close, and I'll be like, there won't be.
Speaker 2: One, and.
Speaker 1: No, I'm not joking, And I struggle. It wears big
Speaker 1: goals and I'm like, of course, of course I'm worthy
Speaker 1: of that, but not a car worthy of my dream house?
Speaker 2: What are you stupid? But a car bar you got?
Speaker 2: I'm no. And it's so I think it's really about worth.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And I think there's something Obviously this person knows
Speaker 1: about limiting beliefs. They know about the RNC project formula,
Speaker 1: so they do have the tools. I just think they
Speaker 1: may need to go deeper and work on the self belief,
Speaker 1: work on the self esteem about why maybe they think
Speaker 1: they can't have those things.
Speaker 2: Yes, And I think also, are you placing an unnecessary
Speaker 2: weight or putting a goal on a pedestal that it
Speaker 2: doesn't need to be on, and that in itself is
Speaker 2: stopping you from achieving it? Interesting because I feel like
Speaker 2: some everyone looks at goals differently in terms of what's
Speaker 2: a little thing, what's a big thing? Because I would
Speaker 2: say that you call a car park a little thing.
Speaker 2: I was like, oh, maybe like an expensive item is
Speaker 2: a little thing, but someone else might look at that
Speaker 2: as a big thing. And by calling it a big thing,
Speaker 2: you're automatically kind of saying you're not worthy. Yeah, like
Speaker 2: putting a label on it. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And well this buys into what's your story around
Speaker 1: this thing, because she's already said I've had this goal
Speaker 1: for years and it just doesn't happen for me. Yes,
Speaker 1: So I think there is some sort of story going
Speaker 1: on here. I'd love to have more details about what
Speaker 1: it is actually, Yeah, because yeah, I think there's maybe
Speaker 1: a story that is replaying here that you think this
Speaker 1: thing is really hard and really big, and it's easy
Speaker 1: to manifest small things but not big things, whereas the
Speaker 1: actual truth of manifesting is everything is the same. The
Speaker 1: energy it takes to manifest a car park is the
Speaker 1: exact same.
Speaker 2: As the energy it takes to manifest a six million
Speaker 2: dollar house, in which would you rather up.
Speaker 3: Me?
Speaker 2: I will take the house please. Here I am with
Speaker 2: my car pug.
Speaker 1: He was like, I will take the car bar. But
Speaker 1: I think again, I think you hit the nail on
Speaker 1: the head. There are tear once you get your head
Speaker 1: around the whole. Even calling it a big thing and
Speaker 1: then calling the small things small things. Yeah, I think
Speaker 1: there's a story playing here that deep down it's worth
Speaker 1: or you have some sort of labels that are running
Speaker 1: the show rather than seeing everything as.
Speaker 2: The same energy. Yeah, and I think maybe even try
Speaker 2: and find an expander that's achieved this goal, to try
Speaker 2: and sort of shrink it down in a way for you. Yeah,
Speaker 2: because I find that expanders helped me not only believe
Speaker 2: that I can do it, but also bring it back
Speaker 2: down to earth in the sense that it's literally so achievable.
Speaker 2: Look at the amount of people that have done it.
Speaker 1: Yes, you know what's interesting A Tia, And I'm sorry
Speaker 1: I keep bringing up this episode, but the episode we
Speaker 1: did with Jason yes last Tuesday.
Speaker 2: If you haven't listened, you gotta so.
Speaker 1: It was really interesting because didn't we When we were
Speaker 1: like researching for the episode, we found out LSKD was
Speaker 1: like a fifty million dollar business or something like. Yes,
Speaker 1: outrageous like that. And it's really funny because I have
Speaker 1: been to the LSKD HQ and I have, like, I
Speaker 1: know the team, I've worked with them, and it is
Speaker 1: really impressive. But it's like they're still just a team,
Speaker 1: and it's like absolutely naked harvest. I still just have
Speaker 1: a team. Yeah, And it's like it really expanded me
Speaker 1: because I obviously have big goals and dreams for Naked Harvest,
Speaker 1: but we're obviously nowhere near at that fifty million dollar mark.
Speaker 1: But just to see Jason and like for him to
Speaker 1: sit in front of me and then to know that
Speaker 1: the in and out workings of his team is and
Speaker 1: obviously it's bigger and it's more impressive, but it made it.
Speaker 2: More Oh, I can do it too.
Speaker 1: Yes, And it was such a great expander for me,
Speaker 1: and I think that's it's so true. Let's find someone
Speaker 1: who has achieved that goal, who has similar circumstances. Because
Speaker 1: a big thing about Jason, as we come from the
Speaker 1: same area, yeah, which is that's like one sore, one
Speaker 1: little thing that just makes me, Yeah, he can do it.
Speaker 2: I can do it too. So yeah, that's a that's
Speaker 2: a great thing too. Is fine in a expander. So
Speaker 2: on last week's episode, you guys would have noticed that
Speaker 2: we did a little bit of a big question to
Speaker 2: start with after our rogue hotline that was chaotic. That
Speaker 2: was chaotic. We did put up a question box on
Speaker 2: Instagram if there was any other taboo topics that you
Speaker 2: guys wanted us to talk about. So we thought we
Speaker 2: might include some here and there in the Hotline episodes
Speaker 2: just to spice it up. And one we both really
Speaker 2: liked was weddings outside of church, sex before marriage? Who
Speaker 2: to invite? And then it says f E. But I
Speaker 2: think she means I E fights with siblings. So if
Speaker 2: you're having a massive fight with your sibling, do you
Speaker 2: still invite them to your wedding? Kind of thing? Interesting?
Speaker 2: I love talking about weddings.
Speaker 1: And also I think we can put in their e
Speaker 1: lope or do a ceremony. Oh yeah, okay, So I
Speaker 1: got married three years ago, so I had.
Speaker 2: A lot of takes on this. What's the first question?
Speaker 2: The first one is doing it outside of church? Well,
Speaker 2: I'm not really like, I guess outside of your religious
Speaker 2: institution if you are religious. Yeah, well I'm not religious,
Speaker 2: So that was an easy one.
Speaker 1: I personally couldn't think of anything worse than having my
Speaker 1: wedding in a church when I'm not religious.
Speaker 2: Yeah weird, Yeah that feels weird. Did you have it
Speaker 2: in like a chapel though?
Speaker 1: No? Okay, so we had it no, yeah, just like
Speaker 1: at a place and it just had a beautiful.
Speaker 2: View of the Hindland. Oh nice.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I been saying that I've got a girlfriend who's
Speaker 1: not religious, but they had it in a chapel and
Speaker 1: the whole ceremony was quite religious, just because her family
Speaker 1: is quite religious and she just like wanted to please them,
Speaker 1: which I thought was quite sweet.
Speaker 2: Yeah that is nice. Yeah, so what was your ceremony?
Speaker 1: Like?
Speaker 2: Super casual and super fun.
Speaker 1: We did our own vowels. The guy was like really
Speaker 1: funny and just very fun and homie.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, what would you do? I definitely want the
Speaker 2: religious We call it a nicker when you get married,
Speaker 2: but that doesn't have to be done in a mosque.
Speaker 2: So I think it would just come down to where
Speaker 2: in the world I'm getting mad married and the costs
Speaker 2: and who to and who to because this is this
Speaker 2: is not a thing I went through on my head.
Speaker 1: Because, for example, if you marry a man who is
Speaker 1: not Muslim.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think I'd still want a knicker, yes, and
Speaker 2: to be married Islamically, would you? I wonder if he
Speaker 2: could dissipate.
Speaker 1: It's just you at the wedding.
Speaker 2: I actually don't know. I should check on that.
Speaker 1: Actually, this is a rogue question. Would you ever marry
Speaker 1: someone who isn't Muslim?
Speaker 2: Yes? But their values need to match mine. Love that,
Speaker 2: So I have no issue marrying someone not Muslim as
Speaker 2: long as our values aligned, but because a lot of
Speaker 2: mine tend to align with my religion. But also as.
Speaker 1: Long as he was super respectful of your beliefs. Religion exactly.
Speaker 2: And I would never want him to stop doing anything
Speaker 2: that because obviously I don't drink and stuff like that.
Speaker 2: But say he had a wine here and there. I
Speaker 2: wouldn't ever want a press for someone to stop. But
Speaker 2: I would have to be okay with that. Yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 2: But I would never make someone stop being who they
Speaker 2: are just because they're marrying me. Good, I would hope not.
Speaker 1: No.
Speaker 2: All right, next question, sex before marriage? I love her
Speaker 2: follow ups.
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna go road and be very open and say.
Speaker 2: I had sex when I was fourteen.
Speaker 1: Oh my god. Yeah, I was a child, and I.
Speaker 2: So in Jehovah's witness. Is that against the rules?
Speaker 1: Yes? Rules?
Speaker 2: I was no longer Jehovah's witness.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, I was like and also I was going
Speaker 1: through my rebel teenage stage.
Speaker 2: I was a bad teenager. I was.
Speaker 1: It was really funny because I started being a rebel
Speaker 1: and going to parties and stuff when I was fourteen fifteen,
Speaker 1: and then I became really studious in grade eleven and twelve,
Speaker 1: Like I've pulled it together, yeah, and.
Speaker 2: Like stop going to parties and like stop drinking and stuff.
Speaker 2: Oh wow. Yeah.
Speaker 1: So I had like a really bad stint when I
Speaker 1: was younger and then kind of got through it. And
Speaker 1: then it's funny because everyone else was going through their
Speaker 1: rebel stage and I was.
Speaker 2: Like, been there, done that. So I can't believe I.
Speaker 1: Just said that on air.
Speaker 2: So I had sex quite young.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's something now looking back, I didn't even understand
Speaker 1: the whole concept.
Speaker 2: And it is just because my parents.
Speaker 1: Had the belief that you don't have sex before marriage. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so I didn't get did they both follow that? They say?
Speaker 1: Literally I asked them and they're like, we never had
Speaker 1: sex before marriage when I was younger, and then like
Speaker 1: now they're like, yeah, of.
Speaker 2: Course we didn't. And I was like you why would
Speaker 2: you say that? Is you know, no wonder why I
Speaker 2: went through a rebel stage?
Speaker 1: You lied to me anyway, So I.
Speaker 2: Was like pushing back.
Speaker 1: But now, looking back, this is a random rant. But
Speaker 1: for example, I've had this conversation with Tim that with Ivy.
Speaker 1: I to be very open about sex because my parents weren't,
Speaker 1: and I went through it at a stage where I
Speaker 1: actually didn't really understand the whole concept, and I wish
Speaker 1: I had more information and more just understanding because I
Speaker 1: don't think I would have had sex so young.
Speaker 2: That makes so much sense, do you know what I mean? Yeah,
Speaker 2: it's almost if you don't talk to someone or have
Speaker 2: an open conversation about those things, they're more likely to
Speaker 2: do it. And then it's like when you're underage drinking.
Speaker 2: I feel like it's the easiest way to explain it
Speaker 2: is that you'd rather do it in the safe space
Speaker 2: because you're going to do it anyway, so at least
Speaker 2: be educated and understand what you're doing before you do it,
Speaker 2: because then you can make an educated decision as to
Speaker 2: whether to do it or not.
Speaker 1: Correct And for me, in that situation, all my friends
Speaker 1: had already had sex, so I just thought it was
Speaker 1: the thing I think we all did. Yeah, And I
Speaker 1: also I did have a long term boyfriend and he
Speaker 1: was really sweet and it was fine. Yeah, But but
Speaker 1: now looking back, I wish there was some more openness
Speaker 1: and some conversation about it. Yeah, for me to actually
Speaker 1: having an understanding about sex, not it being like this
Speaker 1: weird exclusive thing that you don't have sex before you're marriage,
Speaker 1: and yeah, because it's just that's not applicable for everyone.
Speaker 2: I feel like it.
Speaker 1: I love the concept, not really, I don't love it,
Speaker 1: but like I understand the concept of no sex before marriage,
Speaker 1: but if it's not applicable, I think it's important for
Speaker 1: young women to understand it. Yeah, just everyone, of course,
Speaker 1: it needs to be something that I think they do
Speaker 1: talk about it more in schools now than they did
Speaker 1: when we were in school.
Speaker 2: I remember sex ed, but it wasn't sex ed. It
Speaker 2: was like, here's how reproduction work.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel like, but that's what I mean, Like
Speaker 1: I just had no concept of again tear my about
Speaker 1: how to like what felt good for me, how like
Speaker 1: knowing my body, Yeah, understanding about what sex is actually
Speaker 1: about and how you should feel very empowered and you know,
Speaker 1: it should be feel very like.
Speaker 2: Knowing what good feels like vers knowing what bad feels like. Yeah,
Speaker 2: kind other than just like things being painful or not painful.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I think just openness about it. Yeah, because
Speaker 1: it felt like this naughty thing. And I think also
Speaker 1: being a young rebellious child, a naughty thing. You want
Speaker 1: to go do it? Yes, He's like, cannot relate. I'm like,
Speaker 1: I was just the most uptight kid ever up tied here.
Speaker 1: I was like getting drunk, dying and feels and grateful.
Speaker 2: My mom told me I needed to learn how to
Speaker 2: take a joke, so I borrowed a Knock Knock joke
Speaker 2: book from the library. Oh tear, you're so sweet. I
Speaker 2: love you.
Speaker 1: It's funny because you're not that uptight now.
Speaker 2: No, no, no, I've chilled out good. I was wound up,
Speaker 2: like wow. It was insane interesting in the sense that
Speaker 2: to the point that my teachers had to work with
Speaker 2: me to not get an entire week's worth of homew
Speaker 2: I've done on the day they gave it to me,
Speaker 2: because I'd just like stay up till midnight. In primary school,
Speaker 2: I would stay up till midnight doing the homework they
Speaker 2: gave to me that day when I had a week.
Speaker 2: There was something going on there. What, Yeah, it was
Speaker 2: a crazy concern. I was. I don't know why I
Speaker 2: was wound so tightly, but I'm fine now. So it's okay.
Speaker 2: We love this transflation for you anyway.
Speaker 1: That's my view what's your view on sex before marriage?
Speaker 2: I don't know your moment.
Speaker 1: No, your religion is no sex before marriage, just like
Speaker 1: Jehovah's witness.
Speaker 2: I feel like I feel close religions are no sex
Speaker 2: before Maria. Yeah, and I haven't had a boyfriend, so
Speaker 2: I can't really comment because I don't know what I
Speaker 2: would want to do. She'll get back to us. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I don't think i'd ever casually do it just to
Speaker 2: do it, you know, like this, I'm not going to
Speaker 2: download Tinder and go hook up with someone just because
Speaker 2: I want to have sex? Why not? Though I don't
Speaker 2: want to right now, But that's the things you don't
Speaker 2: want to I couldn't tell you why for someone who
Speaker 2: does want to have sex, Oh, go for it. Yeah,
Speaker 2: Like I have no issue with that.
Speaker 3: Yeah good, Yeah, it's because that's actually not like for
Speaker 3: me myself and I I felt like growing up there
Speaker 3: was such a stigma around like slutty girls and that
Speaker 3: sort of thing, which now looking back.
Speaker 2: I'm like, what is wrong with people? Yeah?
Speaker 1: And that's like another conversation that I want to have
Speaker 1: with Ivy and like just being like you should feel empowered.
Speaker 2: To sleep with as many people as you want.
Speaker 1: Yeah safely please Yeah, yeah, obviously safely. But also it's like,
Speaker 1: if you're a person who enjoy sex and you love yeah,
Speaker 1: you love that experience and it feels really good for
Speaker 1: you and really empowering, you should feel empowered to go and.
Speaker 2: Do that thing. Absolutely.
Speaker 1: You shouldn't feel like, oh, society says as a woman,
Speaker 1: I should sleep with one persons off in my whole life.
Speaker 2: Guys get praised for sleeping with lots of women, but
Speaker 2: girls get shatter. This is this is a whole other episode.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it is like and I grew up with three brothers,
Speaker 1: so you can imagine, yeah, toxic masculinity.
Speaker 2: Yeah, in it wasn't toxic.
Speaker 1: Like my brothers are great, they're very respectful.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I want to put that on there.
Speaker 1: But yeah, it's just a whole thing where it's like
Speaker 1: you get to decide and I just want again, this
Speaker 1: is me talking about Ivy is.
Speaker 2: I just want her to feel.
Speaker 1: Really empowered and her to make that decision and in
Speaker 1: the end, like it's all it's all left us.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And I feel like another important thing that isn't
Speaker 2: spoken enough about feeling empowered to have sex verse sex
Speaker 2: making you feel good because you're happy someone wants to
Speaker 2: sleep with you because your self esteem is that low. Yeah, Like,
Speaker 2: I've seen both ends of the stick, and I it's
Speaker 2: like a weird subject to broach with someone because they're
Speaker 2: always like, oh, but it makes me feel good. And
Speaker 2: I know you can't really tell someone that something's making
Speaker 2: them feel good for the wrong reasons. But it's more
Speaker 2: like the dip after that is so low that they
Speaker 2: just need to sleep with someone else to get on
Speaker 2: a high. Yep, Like it's kind of addictive. Interesting.
Speaker 1: I've I don't have a lot of thoughts on the
Speaker 1: topic because I've never thought about it, yeah, or been
Speaker 1: in that scenario because I'm someone who's had a boyfriend
Speaker 1: like her whole life.
Speaker 2: Yeah, or wait, he's my husband and my boyfriend to.
Speaker 1: Ask, Yeah, and like both long term relationships. But yeah,
Speaker 1: I understand what you mean.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Interesting, that's all I upset on that. Okay, I
Speaker 2: love this. Who to invite to your wedding? I love this.
Speaker 1: I'm a big advocate that you don't have to invite everyone.
Speaker 1: It's just who you like, So just because they're family
Speaker 1: doesn't mean they get to come to your wedding. Ooh,
Speaker 1: huge advocate like, for example, my wedding was expensive. Yeah
Speaker 1: per head, you're paying hundreds and hundreds of dollars per head.
Speaker 2: Yeah. So it's like if you're just inviting people to
Speaker 2: please that person, well, not like to please a person
Speaker 2: who's getting invited, yeah, or just because you think you
Speaker 2: have to. I don't know, not a vibe for me.
Speaker 2: What would you say, say you have a group of
Speaker 2: six girlfriends, Yeah, and you get along with five of them,
Speaker 2: and then the extra one is like a mutual friend
Speaker 2: of someone that's come into the group and you'reinly vibe.
Speaker 2: Do you have to invite that person? No? No, why
Speaker 2: you'll invite the it's my wedding.
Speaker 1: I so a big thing that I'm sim with the
Speaker 1: the big thing that I do is would I be
Speaker 1: invited to their wedding?
Speaker 2: And what if you would be? Then what do you do?
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, true? Yeah? Well yeah, or what if you
Speaker 2: have been invited to their wedding? Oh yeah, look, I'd
Speaker 2: probably just didn't mind that. I'd probably feel bad.
Speaker 1: But also I think with that whole friend's situation, before
Speaker 1: the wedding invites went out, I would have a conversation
Speaker 1: with that person and go, look, I love your company.
Speaker 1: I obviously spend a lot of time with you could
Speaker 1: because we've come together because of mutual friends. I just
Speaker 1: want to let you know our wedding is super intimate
Speaker 1: and it is quite expensive, and for that reason, we
Speaker 1: have had to just be very you know, particular with
Speaker 1: who were invited. And I'd love for you to come
Speaker 1: to the engagement party, but you just you're not on
Speaker 1: the wedding list.
Speaker 2: Was your wedding intimate like eighty people? Okay, yeah, that's
Speaker 2: pretty small. Yeah, I think you can say that. And
Speaker 2: I and I feel like anyone who's having a big
Speaker 2: wedding you just got to stuck it up and invite
Speaker 2: the people. Yeah. I don't know, I don't agree with that.
Speaker 1: I just like, if you had your wedding people there,
Speaker 1: who knows, three hundred people?
Speaker 2: There were three hundred people at my uncles.
Speaker 1: Oh that's a whole other thing. Yeah, that's like family
Speaker 1: family vibes.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Wait, the sibling question. Yeah, so it's like, do
Speaker 2: you invite your sibling if you're having a fight with
Speaker 2: them to your wedding? I think you do.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I agree, if you don't think this fight is
Speaker 1: going to last forever, I think you do. I think
Speaker 1: even if you think the fight's going to last forever,
Speaker 1: you invite them because of your sibling and you don't
Speaker 1: know what's going to happen. What if you mend this relationship,
Speaker 1: no matter how broken it is at that point in time,
Speaker 1: and then you come to regret not having them there?
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1: Yeah, Like I another actual thing just to note on
Speaker 1: that with the people is something I did at my
Speaker 1: wedding is I said for extra people who I was
Speaker 1: close with, but it's like, you know, we didn't have
Speaker 1: enough seats or whatever. I did say, you can come
Speaker 1: to the ceremony, we just don't have enough spots for
Speaker 1: you at the you know, Oh that's nice after party
Speaker 1: or whatever. The reception, Yeah, reception, the after party, that thing.
Speaker 2: I've heard that some people sell tickets to their reception
Speaker 2: ticket what do you.
Speaker 1: Like, make them pay for it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, they'll pay for like the eighty people, and they'll
Speaker 2: have a ceremony with one hundred people and they'll say, oh,
Speaker 2: if you want to come to the reception, it's going
Speaker 2: to be two hundred dollars. What are your thoughts on that? Oh,
Speaker 2: I just don't have them. That's weird. Yeah, you can't
Speaker 2: ask someone to pay. Again, I was.
Speaker 1: About to say, but I come from a wedding where
Speaker 1: like we paid for everything, even with like the bridesmaids
Speaker 1: and groonsmen and stuff like we just yeah, I just
Speaker 1: had the view like if I'm not making them be
Speaker 1: a bridesmaid. But I was just like I didn't want anyone,
Speaker 1: especially because like when I got married, like I was
Speaker 1: twenty two or twenty three, So it's like, so you
Speaker 1: were young. I was young, and I knew a lot
Speaker 1: of our friends didn't have a lot of money. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and I wasn't gonna make them like fork out a
Speaker 1: lot of money just so we could have our special day.
Speaker 1: But did you have like, were you pretty financing stable
Speaker 1: at that point? Somew It definitely cost us a lot
Speaker 1: of money. But for example, if you're making the decision
Speaker 1: to have a big wedding, I think you should wear
Speaker 1: the cost.
Speaker 2: That was just our view.
Speaker 1: So we were happy to wear the cost, yeah, and
Speaker 1: just be broke for a bit because it did left us,
Speaker 1: you know. But then I think that's why if you're
Speaker 1: someone who wants to have this lavish wedding and all
Speaker 1: the extras, but then you want, you know, everyone to
Speaker 1: pay money to come.
Speaker 2: I just I don't know, I don't think that's very fair. Yeah, no,
Speaker 2: I totally agree in that sense. But what about It's
Speaker 2: interesting because I know a lot of people that have
Speaker 2: also asked bridesmaids and groomsmen to pay for the suits
Speaker 2: or dresses and to shoes. Yeah, like if it's a
Speaker 2: couple of hundred dollars or whatever like for like those people. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I think that's fine.
Speaker 1: I just think asking people to pay for their seat
Speaker 1: at a reception or for example, I think this is
Speaker 1: just my view. Bridesmaids, if you want them to have
Speaker 1: an expensive dress, you know, a Zimmerman or a Beckon
Speaker 1: Bridge or something like that that is over two hundred dollars,
Speaker 1: I think you should pay for it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, absolutely, or like subsidize the cost majorly. Yeah, because
Speaker 2: I've known people who literally make their brides maids pay
Speaker 2: for like eight hundred dollars dresses. No, And it's like
Speaker 2: I just am like, oh my gosh, I said, I
Speaker 2: meant never buy dress from Pedal and Pup. They ordered, yes,
Speaker 2: well that's yeah.
Speaker 1: The last wedding I went to literally my dresses from
Speaker 1: Pedal and Pup and I was like, of course I'm
Speaker 1: gonna buy it. Yeah, exactly, and like amazing, But yeah,
Speaker 1: I think I don't know. I've just known a couple
Speaker 1: of stories of like people having bougie weddings, but.
Speaker 2: Like then wanting people to pay for things. I'm like,
Speaker 2: what another question on weddings, what is the appropriate amount
Speaker 2: to gift a couple if they're having a wishing well
Speaker 2: wedding or what is an appropriate wedding gift? First? Inappropriate
Speaker 2: wedding gift?
Speaker 1: I always do money because as someone who had a wedding,
Speaker 1: I would want money. Yeah, because you're just trying to
Speaker 1: repay all the money you spent. Yeah, do you want
Speaker 1: an actual amount? Because I'm happy to do that.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I reckon, let's do it and then let's pull the
Speaker 1: audience on what they think.
Speaker 2: Yeah, this is also remembering. This is as a couple.
Speaker 1: I think it's to get around if you're a single person.
Speaker 1: As a couple, if it's someone we're not as close with,
Speaker 1: but it's like you've been invited to the wedding, mutual
Speaker 1: friends having fun.
Speaker 2: Like maybe you're seated towards the back of the reception
Speaker 2: kind of relationship with the person.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you're at the back yeah, I reckon like two
Speaker 1: hundred to three hundred. Yeah, absolutely, any close friends, we've
Speaker 1: always gone like five hundred. Yeah, because for example, our wedding,
Speaker 1: I remember it was close to two hundred per head. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so you're basically covering what your per meal and drinks are. Yeah,
Speaker 1: knowing this person has just spent a lot of money
Speaker 1: and you really love this person and you want them.
Speaker 2: To have a great day, and would you give them
Speaker 2: a gift as well? Then no, or like say if
Speaker 2: you were a bridesmaid, Oh yeah, if.
Speaker 1: You're a bridesmaid, because you do a little gift, you're
Speaker 1: you know, all the bridesmaids.
Speaker 2: Put in and you get her a little gift.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think that's fine it and then like a
Speaker 1: little bit of money and a yeah yeah, So like
Speaker 1: rule of FuMB depending on the wedding, it's kind of
Speaker 1: how to cover your own costs to a certain extenth
Speaker 1: to just like help them out and enjoy the day.
Speaker 1: But in saying that, yeah, I think I don't know
Speaker 1: if that's I don't know where that sits in the
Speaker 1: realm of how other people.
Speaker 2: I kind of look at it the same. I would
Speaker 2: put about one hundred to one hundred and fifty dollars
Speaker 2: in yeah, by myself, Yes, because I'd say that's probably
Speaker 2: around what the wedding would cost. Yeah. Or I'd get
Speaker 2: them something that I know they need, Like if I
Speaker 2: know they're just about to move out and they might
Speaker 2: need something for their kitchen, and I have a good
Speaker 2: relationship with them and I know that they need that
Speaker 2: specific thing, I will do it, but with a gift receipt.
Speaker 2: Always with a gift receipt just in case they get
Speaker 2: given five of them. But otherwise you have money. Yeah.
Speaker 2: The last thing I wanted to talk about eloping versus
Speaker 2: having a ceremony, verse having a huge wedding or a
Speaker 2: small wedding. I think it's just completely up to you.
Speaker 1: If it's really important for you to have your big
Speaker 1: day and you want, you know, the big ceremony, then
Speaker 1: like do that. But if it's not really your vibe,
Speaker 1: I wouldn't bother quote unquote wasting the money.
Speaker 2: How did you and Tim design? I?
Speaker 1: You know, I come from a Biggish family. I have
Speaker 1: three brothers, I have a lot of arnies and uncles,
Speaker 1: and I always have great memories of other weddings and
Speaker 1: it being like really beautiful family time.
Speaker 2: And like I wanted to wear the big white dress.
Speaker 2: I wanted to have.
Speaker 1: All the flowers. I wanted to feel like, you know,
Speaker 1: a queen on my wedding day. So I always knew
Speaker 1: I wanted the big wedding day.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm a very That's that's my style. If you
Speaker 2: haven't known that.
Speaker 1: In saying that, Like my best friend she's and I
Speaker 1: was also like quite young, and it was that was
Speaker 1: just my mentality. I thought I did like we did,
Speaker 1: we really wanted to do.
Speaker 2: That means yeah.
Speaker 1: But for example, my best friend, she she's actually not engaged,
Speaker 1: but she said when we get married, she's like, I
Speaker 1: just want a big party.
Speaker 2: And she's just like, we'll probably hire at a house.
Speaker 1: We'll just have our close friends and family. She doesn't
Speaker 1: have a lot of family, so she's like and she's like,
Speaker 1: we'll probably literally just you know, get married at the
Speaker 1: court and then come back to the house and.
Speaker 2: Just have a big celebration. I love that. Yeah, So
Speaker 2: I think it's just and she's not a traditional sort
Speaker 2: of girl. Yeah. And how did you guys decide sort
Speaker 2: of what circle of friendship to stop inviting people at?
Speaker 2: If that makes sense, We.
Speaker 1: Just invited our close friends and that was it. I
Speaker 1: don't have many friends, so it was quite easy.
Speaker 2: I feel like I didn't have any friends many friends either,
Speaker 2: so look, there weren't a lot of people.
Speaker 1: Man. All right, guys, we're going to do a poll
Speaker 1: of these wedding questions to see what you guys think.
Speaker 1: So it makes sure you come to our Instagram later
Speaker 1: on today. But yeah, I hope you enjoyed this saucy
Speaker 1: butt line episode. Thank you, Thank you so much for
Speaker 1: listening to another episode of the Rise and Conquer podcast.
Speaker 1: If you enjoyed it and want more, come connect with
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