WEBVTT - MINI! Laura’s Teary Confession “I’ve failed as a parent”

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<v Speaker 1>Guys, I have something that's a lot more serious that

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<v Speaker 1>I wanted to talk to you about. It comes as

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<v Speaker 1>a bit of a PSA to parents out there. As

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<v Speaker 1>you might know, I'm a mom. I have two little kids, Marley,

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<v Speaker 1>she's four, and Lola's two. And on the weekend we

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<v Speaker 1>were faced with the situation that I did not think

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<v Speaker 1>I would be faced with this early with my kids.

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<v Speaker 1>So just to kind of give you the background, we

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<v Speaker 1>have a lovely older lady who lives next door to us.

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<v Speaker 1>She's in her eighties. It's been a really nice part

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<v Speaker 1>of like living in this new house is that the

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<v Speaker 1>kids will go over and they will visit this lovely

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<v Speaker 1>lady next door, and our doors always opened her and

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<v Speaker 1>we kind of try and keep her company as well

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<v Speaker 1>as you know, allow the kids to have a bit

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<v Speaker 1>of a relationship with our neighbor. And on the weekend

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<v Speaker 1>just passed, I went over there with the girls and

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<v Speaker 1>my neighbor and I were standing on the balcony having

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<v Speaker 1>a chat, and the girls run inside into her house

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<v Speaker 1>and we're playing around because she's got dolls inside, she's

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<v Speaker 1>got things in there. And about fifteen minutes past and

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<v Speaker 1>Marley and Lola came out, and Lola, who's two, was

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<v Speaker 1>white as a ghost, and Marley was bawling her eyes out,

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<v Speaker 1>and I thought, what could have possibly just happened? And

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<v Speaker 1>Marley came out and said, oh, there was something on

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<v Speaker 1>the TV. And I walked inside, and not realizing our

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<v Speaker 1>neighborhood is quite elderly, she didn't really register what she

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<v Speaker 1>had playing out on the TV. And she had a

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<v Speaker 1>true crime documentary playing and so the girls had run

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<v Speaker 1>inside they'd seen something on the TV, and then they'd

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<v Speaker 1>stood there and watched it, and they had seen something

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<v Speaker 1>truly horrific play out on TV, really violent. And now

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<v Speaker 1>this is so much for a little two year old

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<v Speaker 1>and a four year old to process, and also for

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<v Speaker 1>me as a parent to process the fact that they've

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<v Speaker 1>experienced this and they've seen it, and then how do

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<v Speaker 1>we deal with that? And it's just been such a

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<v Speaker 1>challenging two days, and it's going to make me upset

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<v Speaker 1>because you try so hard as a mum to protect

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<v Speaker 1>your kids from this sort of stuff and then it

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<v Speaker 1>feels like, in one moment you can completely fail them.

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<v Speaker 1>And that's how I felt off the back of that experience.

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<v Speaker 1>And you know, I thought, in this house, they were

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<v Speaker 1>so safe. We've done it a hundred times, and it

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<v Speaker 1>was just in that moment. And then you're like, how

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<v Speaker 1>do you take back something that they've now seen. How

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<v Speaker 1>do you comfort them in a way to explain what

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<v Speaker 1>they've seen on a TV isn't real when they're too

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<v Speaker 1>young to really comprehend what's happening.

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, I think the thing is here, not that

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<v Speaker 2>it makes it okay, But unfortunately in life, there are

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<v Speaker 2>going to be things that are outside of your control.

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<v Speaker 2>And you can be the best parent in the entire world,

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<v Speaker 2>which we all know you are, and these things can

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<v Speaker 2>still happen that you can't undo that, and you can't

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<v Speaker 2>be even a helicopter parent can't be with their kids

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<v Speaker 2>twenty four to seven. Like there's always going to be

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<v Speaker 2>something in life. And you know you hear this from

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<v Speaker 2>parents all the time at all different ages that you

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<v Speaker 2>wish you could protect them from everything and be there

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<v Speaker 2>with them every step of the way, but you just can't.

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<v Speaker 2>And I guess now it's how do you explain to

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<v Speaker 2>them that that was fake, that that wasn't real, that

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<v Speaker 2>that's a growing up show where it's acting like I'm assuming.

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<v Speaker 3>That was tomatoesource that What is that what you had

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<v Speaker 3>to do? What was your first step as a parent.

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<v Speaker 3>Did you talk to Matt, your husband, and go, we

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<v Speaker 3>need to talk to them.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, And my first step with the girls was really reassuring.

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<v Speaker 1>I mean, they live in the safest house, They are

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<v Speaker 1>filled with love, like they are filled with safety. But

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<v Speaker 1>I just I was like, how do you explain to

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<v Speaker 1>them that what's happening on the TV isn't real? How

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<v Speaker 1>do you explain to them that what they've just seen

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<v Speaker 1>is not something that they should have to comprehend it?

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<v Speaker 1>And I guess partly as well, like you want to

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<v Speaker 1>validate that it's okay to be scared of that, because

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<v Speaker 1>I would have been scared too, but it's not real.

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<v Speaker 1>And I guess for me, I just having this experience

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<v Speaker 1>on the weekend, it made me exactly as you said,

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<v Speaker 1>like realize that you can try so hard, like you

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<v Speaker 1>can put all of the safety nets in place, and

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<v Speaker 1>sometimes things can happen that feel beyond your control. But

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<v Speaker 1>that doesn't mean that you don't feel incredibly guilty for it.

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<v Speaker 1>And That's what I'm dealing with now, is this, like

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<v Speaker 1>I feel like I'm the failure in that.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh, Gloria, you can't feel that. That's so normal and

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<v Speaker 3>so natural. It's part of growing up. Like you said, Britta,

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<v Speaker 3>I have memories to this day of seeing Pans Labyrinth.

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<v Speaker 3>Nowhere knew what the girls saw, but it's so scary.

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<v Speaker 3>And also all my cousins had all the Goosebumps books

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<v Speaker 3>and the front covers.

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<v Speaker 2>I was scared.

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<v Speaker 3>I would go downstairs in my cousin's house at family

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<v Speaker 3>events and I'd look at these covers and I'd look

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<v Speaker 3>at them and I'd be so terrified, and I would

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<v Speaker 3>lose sleep over them. I didn't tell anyone, and it's

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<v Speaker 3>not my parents fault. I don't think I'm blame my kids,

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<v Speaker 3>So your kids are not going to blame you.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, And maybe this is the reminder to parents, like

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<v Speaker 1>your kids at some point are going to see things,

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<v Speaker 1>whether it be because they have an older sibling who's

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<v Speaker 1>on an iPad or because you've been on Instagram, and like,

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<v Speaker 1>there's so much that's happening online these days, whether it

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<v Speaker 1>be violence overseas or whatever it is, but it is

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<v Speaker 1>very easy for them to come across something that is

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<v Speaker 1>not age appropriate. And I guess for me, this was

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<v Speaker 1>a real lesson around how much more I guess active

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<v Speaker 1>I have to be and how much more protection kids

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<v Speaker 1>need in terms of like screen time and having that

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<v Speaker 1>being in front of mind.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, of course, all right, let's get out of here, guys,

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<v Speaker 3>let's go. We're gonna chat to you tomorrow. We're back

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<v Speaker 3>for your Wednesday. If you've missed the show, you can podcast.

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<v Speaker 3>So we had a revelation that fifty percent of women

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<v Speaker 3>have a backup boyfriend. I don't.

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<v Speaker 1>There's three women in this room right now and none

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<v Speaker 1>of us have a backup boyfriend. So you have back

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<v Speaker 1>up boyfriends when you're dating.

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<v Speaker 3>I don't even have one boyfriend. No, I don't. I

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<v Speaker 3>don't have a backup But we had this conversation earlier

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<v Speaker 3>in the show podcast on iHeart search to pick up.

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<v Speaker 3>We'll see you guys tomorrow.

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<v Speaker 2>There