Speaker 1: What do your feet look like, Shami? Yeah, no, I
Speaker 1: need to see them. You've often how much money you've made?
Speaker 1: That fucking pinky toe? Who is paying for that thing
Speaker 1: that's hanging on for dear life? What is that?
Speaker 2: What is that? Guilty? Guilty?
Speaker 3: I did make some money on a certain platform with
Speaker 3: my feet.
Speaker 1: How fard you go up? Was it just feet?
Speaker 2: Feet? And Dick? Welcome back to two doting dads. But
Speaker 2: it's with a difference. Today it's with a doting mum.
Speaker 2: You interrupt me already.
Speaker 3: It's with a doting mum usually looking at Matt, but
Speaker 3: now I've got the pleasure of looking at Matt's wife
Speaker 3: and arguably the better parent, Laura Burn.
Speaker 2: Thank you for joining us.
Speaker 1: Definitely not the better parent.
Speaker 2: That will be the judge of that.
Speaker 1: I have been solo parenting for one week now and
Speaker 1: everything surprisingly has been going okay. But I have some
Speaker 1: very big choose to fill and I need to admit
Speaker 1: because I feel like I should have done my research
Speaker 1: and listened to some recent episodes just to get into
Speaker 1: the listen to it keaven for a little bit. Okay,
Speaker 1: let me finish the intro then, thank you. I don't
Speaker 1: know what stories Matt shared or whether I'm going to
Speaker 1: be telling the truth.
Speaker 2: We'll find out.
Speaker 3: This is a parenting podcast, the good, the bad, and
Speaker 3: the relatable, and we do not give any advice real
Speaker 3: advice unless you want to take it anyway.
Speaker 2: Lauria doesn't listen to us. I've just found out. So
Speaker 2: that's a good start. I do.
Speaker 1: I just have been so busy parenting this week that
Speaker 1: haven't been able to listen as regularly as I would.
Speaker 3: I'm not used to running the episode and Matte usually
Speaker 3: runs the episode, so please.
Speaker 2: Bear with me.
Speaker 1: Wow, this is Ash feeling completely out of his depth
Speaker 1: right now? Do you feel confident? Do you feel comfortable?
Speaker 1: How are you coping with my husband being away?
Speaker 2: Look, I'm struggling. It's only been at three minutes. But
Speaker 2: have you had a This is not about me, This
Speaker 2: is about you.
Speaker 1: Okay, So Matt as I'm sure you guys are all
Speaker 1: aware he's now in the I'm a celebrity jungle. By
Speaker 1: the time you're listening to this, it would have been
Speaker 1: on TV right there would have been a couple of episodes.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you potentially have played out. You should have been
Speaker 2: like four days in or three days.
Speaker 1: What did Matt update you guys on before him going away.
Speaker 1: Did he tell you about how that went with the
Speaker 1: kids and what this period for us has been like.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so he gave us an idea just how chaotic
Speaker 3: it was in trying to get loose ends tied up.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so Matt told I mean, he kind of left
Speaker 1: it really late. He told the girls that he was
Speaker 1: going away to do the show, but he didn't really
Speaker 1: think through the logistics of that. So firstly, he told
Speaker 1: both the girls specifically that he was going to Africa
Speaker 1: and he was going on a TV show called I'm
Speaker 1: a Celebrity, Get Me out of Here.
Speaker 2: As a five year old knows where Africa is.
Speaker 1: The the thing is she does. What she doesn't realize
Speaker 1: is what ndeser. So Maley had been going to day it.
Speaker 1: Marley had been going to vacation care and telling every
Speaker 1: single person, my dad's going on I'm a Celebrity, get
Speaker 1: me out.
Speaker 2: Of here, and he's going to Africa.
Speaker 1: So we rocked up to pick Molley up from school
Speaker 1: and this was like a week before he left, and
Speaker 1: the teachers.
Speaker 2: Were like, good luck.
Speaker 1: On the show, everyone knew, so I know it was
Speaker 1: meant to be embargoed, but if you live in Bondai,
Speaker 1: three quarters of Marley, it's Marley May And he also
Speaker 1: told Lola, and because Lola actually like kind of hates
Speaker 1: Matt and doesn't really care if he's there or not.
Speaker 1: Unfortunately he's great dad, but he he's not Lola's favorite.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's yeah. We've we did a period a whole
Speaker 2: year on that. Yeah.
Speaker 1: So he broke it to her that he was going away,
Speaker 1: and her reaction to that was girl's Day and it
Speaker 1: broke his goddamn heart.
Speaker 3: Oh, I bet because he's worked so hard at the
Speaker 3: last twelve months of try and it's kind of pathetic
Speaker 3: how hard you work, because he was like just trying
Speaker 3: to win her over, and every and every time he
Speaker 3: won her over last year, you'd come back into the
Speaker 3: room or I think you were away for a little
Speaker 3: while there, and it was Matt and the girls, and
Speaker 3: he was like, she's got no one else, so she's
Speaker 3: stuck with me. So hopefully by the time that Laura
Speaker 3: gets back, not forgotten about Laura. But I have evened
Speaker 3: it up a little bit so that I am a parent,
Speaker 3: yeah straight away apparently.
Speaker 1: Almost almost, but she no to be fair, she goes
Speaker 1: through these periods where she how do I describe it,
Speaker 1: It's like nah, nah, actually take it back now. She
Speaker 1: always just wants me more.
Speaker 2: She's she's a manipulator.
Speaker 3: I've noticed she manipulates him, I know, but they're good
Speaker 3: at it.
Speaker 2: Macy's also does the same thing.
Speaker 3: But one thing that stuck out for me was he
Speaker 3: was like I had won her over, like we're vibing,
Speaker 3: it was all good, and.
Speaker 2: Then he said, I, he's your own daughter.
Speaker 3: He turned around two quick ones and she was behind
Speaker 3: him and knocked her over.
Speaker 2: And that.
Speaker 1: Is the unraveling.
Speaker 2: And that's how quick it can unravel her.
Speaker 1: I've told Matt, I've tried to give him advice on this,
Speaker 1: because it is a real thing. It's called parental preference, right,
Speaker 1: when a child prefers one parent over the other.
Speaker 2: Is a real thing.
Speaker 1: Yeah, again, usually.
Speaker 2: Kind of a parenting podcast. I don't know that.
Speaker 1: Usually kids grow out of it at three. Lola is
Speaker 1: almost four and showing absolutely no signs of growing out
Speaker 1: of it anytime soon. But I like lovingly tried to
Speaker 1: explain to Matt that I just think, like I think
Speaker 1: Lola smells it on him. I think he reeks of desperation.
Speaker 2: We've said that. I said, I can smell it on
Speaker 2: you from.
Speaker 1: Here, mate, and she reminds me of me. But when
Speaker 1: I was like twenty years old, like I never wanted
Speaker 1: to be around the nice guys, and he's so nice
Speaker 1: to her. I was like, you just need to be
Speaker 1: a little bit.
Speaker 2: More sassy.
Speaker 3: Again.
Speaker 2: Exactly right.
Speaker 1: She's taken all my toxic traits from my early dating years.
Speaker 2: That's what this is.
Speaker 1: But I think, look, six weeks of her having potentially,
Speaker 1: if he does well, thing has crossed everyone vote. Six
Speaker 1: weeks of him being away, I feel as though either
Speaker 1: it's gonna be it's gonna be like the real antithesis
Speaker 1: of that, it's gonna be a real issue, or it's
Speaker 1: gonna be the opposite. Because the other night at dinner time,
Speaker 1: like she had no one else to fight with, so
Speaker 1: I was trying to get her fed and it was
Speaker 1: a whole debacle and it ended in her storming up
Speaker 1: the stairs and screaming, I want.
Speaker 2: Why dead out.
Speaker 1: I was like, fuck, if only was here to feel that,
Speaker 1: or he is so happy.
Speaker 3: I know, and no one was, like, no one was
Speaker 3: there to fight with her, So she was like, fuck,
Speaker 3: no one If that's a kryptonite.
Speaker 1: Did Matt tell you before he went away that he
Speaker 1: has a leg secret sign on the show for the girls?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 1: So, I mean it's gonna be hard for him. He's
Speaker 1: been acting very much like in the last couple of
Speaker 1: weeks that he's been pretty nonchalant about the whole thing,
Speaker 1: and then when it came actually to crunch time and
Speaker 1: him going away, he got really emotional and he had
Speaker 1: this station with the girls. He had a big cry.
Speaker 3: He's going to cry. Okay, here's my prediction. We put
Speaker 3: a prediction out there.
Speaker 1: He had a big cry.
Speaker 2: This is my prediction on the show is that Matt
Speaker 2: will cry a lot.
Speaker 1: He's the best.
Speaker 3: He'll cry a lot. And he'll also get snappy a lot.
Speaker 3: Because he gets snappy when he's hungry.
Speaker 1: I feel like that could be a really a good too,
Speaker 1: doting Dad's drinking game. If anyone's watching the show and
Speaker 1: you want to know like when to drink, it's when
Speaker 1: Matt cries and when he says something piece listeners.
Speaker 2: I love that guy.
Speaker 1: Matt can be a real fucking piece of work when
Speaker 1: he's hungry, though, So that might come back to.
Speaker 2: About it work with him. Every day he has.
Speaker 1: This little sign where he's going to do like a
Speaker 1: little love heart sign to the camera for the girls.
Speaker 3: I'm going to make it about me. You know, I'm
Speaker 3: going to make that about me. We know who it's
Speaker 3: really fall.
Speaker 2: And go, well, okay, how.
Speaker 1: Is this going to go over the next few weeks,
Speaker 1: because obviously with Matt being gone, could be two weeks,
Speaker 1: could be six weeks. How many of these are we doing?
Speaker 2: As many as you like? Is April doing? He is
Speaker 2: like a contingency plan.
Speaker 1: Did she know that she's part of the contention plan?
Speaker 3: Nod. I've got the valuum stock up stocked out so
Speaker 3: we can get her on. That's the only way we
Speaker 3: can get about voluum and a glass of wine.
Speaker 1: It'll be April just here like.
Speaker 3: She was.
Speaker 2: I watched that Mac go on TV the other night,
Speaker 2: any krad Al and I'm still drunk.
Speaker 1: All right, We'll see you back here every week.
Speaker 3: Then Matt gave was an update on Lola changing schools,
Speaker 3: because we are in January and there's a lot of
Speaker 3: change happening, like my kids Marley going to a big school,
Speaker 3: Oscar going to big school, but Lola's had to change daycares.
Speaker 3: First of all, I want your side of the story.
Speaker 3: I'm really going to set mat up here, and I'm
Speaker 3: really sorry Matt when you do hear this. What is
Speaker 3: your thoughts on the changing of the school and what's
Speaker 3: your side of the story of how it happens.
Speaker 1: I am horrified by everything, So okay, I feel as
Speaker 1: though a decision was made that I was not a
Speaker 1: part of.
Speaker 2: And to set the scene on there.
Speaker 1: So Lola's been going to one daycare since she was
Speaker 1: about nine months old she's now almost four, Like she's
Speaker 1: been going there pretty much her whole life. The daycare
Speaker 1: teachers from that daycare are also some of her babysitters,
Speaker 1: Like she has her little friends there, Like she's so
Speaker 1: ingrained in that daycare, and she's so confident there, and
Speaker 1: we also know it's an amazing daycare. Likes it's really
Speaker 1: really great. The annoying thing is is that it's probably
Speaker 1: about a forty minute drive round trip to drop her
Speaker 1: off in the mornings, because it's back where we used
Speaker 1: to live. It's not far, but it's like the traffic
Speaker 1: can be bad.
Speaker 2: In the morning. It's simmy everywhere.
Speaker 1: It's just annoying.
Speaker 2: Sometimes I look at the GPS and it's like five
Speaker 2: k's thirty minutes.
Speaker 1: I'm like, what, it's exactly that, but it's actually it's
Speaker 1: And also because Matt leaves it late, so he drops
Speaker 1: her off during school time like smack on when all
Speaker 1: the school kids which are across the road a going.
Speaker 1: So Matt he drops her off a couple of times
Speaker 1: a week, but I also do the pickup, so I
Speaker 1: pick her up on the way home from work, so
Speaker 1: where her daycare was was more convenient for me for
Speaker 1: a pickup, but more annoying for drop off. Cool establish
Speaker 1: that he came home this one day and had the
Speaker 1: idea that because Marley's going to school now, that he
Speaker 1: was going to unenroll Lola from her daycare and enroll
Speaker 1: her in a different daycare which is closer by three
Speaker 1: minutes to us, but it's the same daycare that his
Speaker 1: sister takes Lola's cousin too, so that way they can
Speaker 1: co share.
Speaker 2: The drop of options. I like that, Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: sure co share for co brother and sister parenting lovely.
Speaker 1: For only ten months though, because our niece is going
Speaker 1: to go to school like next year, so there's only
Speaker 1: ten months, so there's still going to be an additional
Speaker 1: year where we have to do that ourselves. So great
Speaker 1: in theory, but also not great in theory because when
Speaker 1: that decision was made, I originally was like, hey, I
Speaker 1: don't think this is a great idea, but it was
Speaker 1: also preceded him going and doing I'm a celebrity, and
Speaker 1: so I kind of felt like, Okay, well, if you're
Speaker 1: not going to be here, surely the easiest and best
Speaker 1: route should be the route that's like calm for Lola
Speaker 1: and fine for her from a transition perspective, and also
Speaker 1: for me since I'm doing all the pickups and drop offs, Like,
Speaker 1: why would we make a change that's actually going to
Speaker 1: make my life harder over this six weeks than anyway.
Speaker 1: So we had many fights about it. I lost. She's
Speaker 1: now going to a different daycare, and she fucking hates it.
Speaker 1: And yesterday, no wonder she hates him, she hates it.
Speaker 1: Yesterday she cried from the second I dropped Maley at
Speaker 1: school the whole way there, and then held onto her
Speaker 1: car seat, screaming as I pulled her out to take
Speaker 1: her inside. And so this is my question to you, Ash.
Speaker 1: Matt is no longer here, which means he can't make
Speaker 1: parenting decisions. Am I the asshole? If at the four
Speaker 1: week mark and he's not home and I'm still dealing
Speaker 1: with this, can I unenroll her and send her back
Speaker 1: to the old daycare?
Speaker 2: Send it back now, Send it back now time he
Speaker 2: gets back. Whenever he gets back, it's going to be
Speaker 2: too late. But when this comes out, he won't be
Speaker 2: able to hear it.
Speaker 3: So by the time he actually hears this, she'll be
Speaker 3: probably two or three weeks deep and back.
Speaker 2: And it's like, leave earlier. Bro, It's it's so hard that.
Speaker 1: I mean, anyone who's been through the process of trying
Speaker 1: to change their kids to a new daycare, it's it's
Speaker 1: like it is soul crushing. And when you have to
Speaker 1: leave your kid with a stranger and they're screaming, crying
Speaker 1: and their friends aren't there and they've got no friends.
Speaker 1: And I got into the car and I just burst
Speaker 1: out crying. I was so sad because she.
Speaker 2: Cried in the car or not, because that's the thing.
Speaker 3: You can't You shouldn't cry in front of them because
Speaker 3: then they think I'm never going to see you again.
Speaker 3: Don't cry. Don't cry on the show. Actually cry, that'd
Speaker 3: be great for the socials.
Speaker 2: Cry damn it.
Speaker 1: I couldn't. I had to let she was holding it
Speaker 1: to Actually she wasn't holding it together. I was holding
Speaker 1: it together. Yeah, And I was just devastated for her
Speaker 1: and she the next day I picked her up and
Speaker 1: she was like, Mommy, I have no friends. I don't
Speaker 1: know anyone's name, like, she was so so sad. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and I'm not used to her being sad. I'm used
Speaker 1: to her being like a fucking ruller recog. She's like, yeah,
Speaker 1: she's like my sassy kind of like a little bit angsty, angry,
Speaker 1: little four year old that nothing phases, and here she
Speaker 1: is being all sad and vulnerable.
Speaker 2: It broke me.
Speaker 3: Oscar's going to big school this year. But just with
Speaker 3: work and stuff, we've got to do the odd casual day. Yeah,
Speaker 3: because April's back at work and I'm here, back at work, and.
Speaker 2: I very hard. It's good to see I'm hard work.
Speaker 2: I had an app today. You started at two thirty.
Speaker 2: I literally did, what time is it? I'm done. It's
Speaker 2: two forty two, I'm done.
Speaker 3: I So I dropped him and Macy off yesterday and
Speaker 3: none of his friends were there, but Macy had friends there.
Speaker 2: And then I was like oh, I was really I
Speaker 2: was actually really worried.
Speaker 3: And I drove past and Oscar was playing with Macy
Speaker 3: and someone else's playing, and I rang April up.
Speaker 2: I'm like, none of his friends. I feel terrible, and
Speaker 2: you do feel bad?
Speaker 1: Did he cry?
Speaker 2: Was there any tea?
Speaker 3: No, he's sort of like at the stage now where
Speaker 3: he's like if Macey's there, he's pretty happy. He's chill
Speaker 3: because he'll look after Macy all day. He'll play whatever
Speaker 3: Macy's playing. And thankfully he came home yesterday and some
Speaker 3: of his friends arrived after I'd left.
Speaker 1: If he was hysterical, what would you do?
Speaker 2: I've gone back in and got him and spent the
Speaker 2: day with him. I've done that once.
Speaker 1: That is shocking to me.
Speaker 2: What do you mean?
Speaker 1: I wouldn't have picked that, or that I've got a heart.
Speaker 2: Not that.
Speaker 1: But just like I think that because I worry, and
Speaker 1: I thought about going back in and getting her and
Speaker 1: being like, oh, just I'm not doing this today, like
Speaker 1: I'll just stay home from work and be with you.
Speaker 1: But then I thought that if I did that, I
Speaker 1: would actually just make it worse for the next day.
Speaker 1: I thought I would just reinforce that if she has
Speaker 1: a huge tantrum and she cries her eyes out that
Speaker 1: then more Mum would just come back and get me.
Speaker 2: Yeah. See the difference here was it wasn't it was,
Speaker 2: it was a different cry.
Speaker 1: I love that because I think that, I mean, it's
Speaker 1: very surprisingly sentimental of you, Oush and vulnerable, but I
Speaker 1: think that you can sew, you can so deeply second
Speaker 1: guess what's the right thing to do, and everyone always
Speaker 1: tells you, oh, well when they when you walk away,
Speaker 1: they're fine fifteen minutes later, like that's kind of the
Speaker 1: thought when.
Speaker 2: And majority of the time that that could be the case. Yeah,
Speaker 2: but it.
Speaker 1: Hasn't been for us this time with Lola, and I
Speaker 1: know that this is going to be a few weeks
Speaker 1: and it's going to be really hard. It just kind
Speaker 1: of sucks that it's coincided when Matt's not here. Had day,
Speaker 1: but I will, but I will tend to pick her up.
Speaker 1: At the end of the day, she'd been there to
Speaker 1: four point thirty and she just looked like she'd been
Speaker 1: crying all day, and the teachers said, yeah, she cried
Speaker 1: on an awful day and often was saying how much
Speaker 1: she misses you, and asked when you're coming to pick
Speaker 1: her up, and I don't know, Like I mean, I
Speaker 1: know that she is resilient, and I know that she
Speaker 1: will be fine the more that we stick to it,
Speaker 1: But I don't know if I have that resilience in parenting.
Speaker 1: And then you have that big question of You're like, well,
Speaker 1: is this one of those moments where like it's going
Speaker 1: to be better for her in the long run.
Speaker 2: I don't know. He sees you being resilient about it.
Speaker 2: She might be more resilient about it too. You just
Speaker 2: give up, and what sort of message does that leave?
Speaker 1: So I shouldn't send her back to her audation podcast
Speaker 1: now sorry, where we unpack our feelings, hold each other
Speaker 1: and cry, and maybe it won't just be Matt crying
Speaker 1: I will also be growing by the end of the
Speaker 1: show as well.
Speaker 2: I would give it how long has been two weeks?
Speaker 2: In two weeks? Give it another week? Okay, that's true.
Speaker 1: I had planned on giving it four to six weeks,
Speaker 1: So like I was going to give it potentially until
Speaker 1: that comes home. Is this I do hope he stays
Speaker 1: in there longer than two weeks, Like if he comes
Speaker 1: home first, I think we've overshot it with how excited
Speaker 1: we've been and how much like.
Speaker 2: Whoa you better do? Really well? Imagine if he gets
Speaker 2: out first, I don't think so, it'd be worse than
Speaker 2: him in there, Like there has to be someone If
Speaker 2: ray Gun goes in, she's out first, surely do you
Speaker 2: know what they'll say, there's no kangaroos alouded here and
Speaker 2: now bounce you away out of here.
Speaker 1: There's been so many I think it's a very big
Speaker 1: possibility it is going to be her by the time
Speaker 1: this comes out. Well know, so like we're all going
Speaker 1: to know that she's in there or not. But anyway,
Speaker 1: well that is all the updates in the Burne Johnson household.
Speaker 3: I can't wait for a couple of days. I want
Speaker 3: to see the girl's reaction. I'm going to watch this season.
Speaker 1: Are you going to come to our house potentially on
Speaker 1: Sunday night?
Speaker 2: You guys should, That's a great idea, come.
Speaker 1: And do a watch party. I've invited a lot of
Speaker 1: people over.
Speaker 2: But can I be drunk?
Speaker 1: Yes, you stay, stay the night, do have.
Speaker 2: An event in the afternoon, but I can come afterwards
Speaker 2: because I'm a busy man. You are so popular.
Speaker 1: I'm going to the basketball Okay, so you will be drunk. Great, perfect,
Speaker 1: that's exactly how I like you. Actually ash what has
Speaker 1: been happening in your household.
Speaker 2: She's taken it upon herself to toilet train herself.
Speaker 1: Well done. I always knew she was a genius.
Speaker 3: Well we look, we're trying to we're trying to toilet
Speaker 3: train her, but only because she's pretty much forcing it
Speaker 3: upon us. She's just keep taking a nappy off everywhere.
Speaker 3: So we're and we're look, we highly encourage it straight away.
Speaker 1: How old is Macy now?
Speaker 2: Just three?
Speaker 1: It's time?
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah, And I'm like with her and I
Speaker 3: was like, oh sweet, because we were going to anyway.
Speaker 1: So how do you go about the toilet training? Like,
Speaker 1: how do you approach this?
Speaker 3: So during the day, we're in undies and it's the
Speaker 3: constant do you need to go the toilet? What do
Speaker 3: you do if you go to need to go the toilet?
Speaker 3: She's got a little toilet shaped potty, like a proper
Speaker 3: looking toilet thing, which she loves.
Speaker 2: It's pink, it's.
Speaker 1: Beautiful, gorgeous.
Speaker 3: I wish I had one when she goes. When we
Speaker 3: can get you on from child size there, yeah, I'd
Speaker 3: use it. Although we've I've heard about your shits. It's
Speaker 3: full to the single use single they are because you
Speaker 3: can take it out, put it in the toilet, wash it.
Speaker 3: Obviously she loves it. But she just disappears, like where's Macey?
Speaker 3: And you looked down the hall and she's sitting on it,
Speaker 3: which is great. So she's really good. She the first
Speaker 3: little while, she would just I don't know with kids,
Speaker 3: if they're into something, they're doing something, they just piss,
Speaker 3: right what like?
Speaker 1: So like early time, you mean she's distracted, she's not
Speaker 1: thinking about the toilet.
Speaker 3: She's real simple. She'll just weak because you think she
Speaker 3: forgets that she's not in a nappy anymore.
Speaker 1: Do you have underwear on her?
Speaker 2: Yes?
Speaker 1: Okay, that's where you're going wrong. Pantless so no pants
Speaker 1: at all, and you just like you have to just
Speaker 1: suck it up and do three days staying at home.
Speaker 1: Don't stuck the piss up, just stay at home.
Speaker 2: Oh damn, easy, clean up a paper straw for the environment.
Speaker 2: I've think of the turtles.
Speaker 1: You've got to do three days of no pants, no underwear,
Speaker 1: just be at home. So it's like as close to
Speaker 1: the potty as possible, so she can easily access it.
Speaker 1: But it's almost like I find that having them with
Speaker 1: no pants on is their constant reminder that when they
Speaker 1: need to go, they need to go to the toilet,
Speaker 1: where when they've got underwear on, they think it's a nappy,
Speaker 1: so they're not actually thinking about the fact that they
Speaker 1: need to go.
Speaker 2: So I am.
Speaker 1: I mean, one thing that I think we we didn't
Speaker 1: have as many struggles with when it comes to like parenting,
Speaker 1: was the potty training thing. I had a friend who
Speaker 1: was like, just once you've made the decision, don't.
Speaker 2: Do any of this.
Speaker 1: Oh, we'll put a nappy when we go out of
Speaker 1: the house and then we'll They're like, you just got
Speaker 1: to You've got to bite the bullet. You gotta go
Speaker 1: three days, hardcore, no pants for three days, just stay
Speaker 1: at home, and within three days they will be so
Speaker 1: close to being potty trained that you can like manage
Speaker 1: it way better.
Speaker 3: We're way past the three days, okay, unfortunately, but like
Speaker 3: we still wears a nappy when she goes to bed,
Speaker 3: because yeah, of course she every fucking day long still
Speaker 3: has a nappy. Yeah, but she takes it off even
Speaker 3: when we were leaving the house. We're still in Undie's work.
Speaker 3: We had ditched the nappies during the day, which is
Speaker 3: great because then we'd be like, we can't go anywhere
Speaker 3: into your weed, right, And I think it was like
Speaker 3: two or three days in it was really just after Christmas,
Speaker 3: and we were to this new park that's sort of
Speaker 3: been done up near our place in the afternoon.
Speaker 2: Great and it's got like a really big, windy slide,
Speaker 2: amazing fun.
Speaker 3: Kids are playing, having a great time and this is
Speaker 3: going it's perfect. And I'm at the bottom of the
Speaker 3: slide and I just see a trickle of what I
Speaker 3: thought at the time was water and it slightly built
Speaker 3: up a puddle at the bottom of the slide, and
Speaker 3: I was like, what the fuck.
Speaker 2: There's kids. There's more than just my kids there. I
Speaker 2: was like, what the fuck is this?
Speaker 3: And I was like, maybe someone's poured like a bottle
Speaker 3: of water down there. And then Macy comes sliding into
Speaker 3: her own pool of pits.
Speaker 1: It's Macy's own water slide.
Speaker 2: She literally and I was like, what the fuck and
Speaker 2: she slipped her and then she gets off the slide
Speaker 2: and goes it's wet, like she.
Speaker 1: Didn't know, and I was like, fuck, how'd you pack
Speaker 1: spare clothes.
Speaker 2: We did.
Speaker 3: We packed spare clothes, thankfully, but like we didn't have
Speaker 3: any wipes to wipe this slide down.
Speaker 1: Fuck it, that's someone else's problem. Macey's got her own
Speaker 1: wet and wild going on. She's just like who can't
Speaker 1: put over Christmas?
Speaker 2: So I got the what she was in. She was
Speaker 2: in a dress.
Speaker 3: I took the dress off, put her in a new dress.
Speaker 3: I sent oscar up there with the wet dress to
Speaker 3: come back down the slide to clean the wee off
Speaker 3: the slide.
Speaker 1: That was very responsible of you. I can't be sure
Speaker 1: that I would have done that.
Speaker 3: There was people right there, and I think they would
Speaker 3: have walked away if there was no one there, I'll
Speaker 3: believe in that piece of dry out.
Speaker 1: It's like when your dog does a poo but it's
Speaker 1: nighttime and you're like, could I get away with this?
Speaker 1: Should I pick this up? Or the always I always do?
Speaker 2: Always the fake pick up my old man does used
Speaker 2: to do. The fake pick up is the.
Speaker 1: Fake pickup where you just pick up next to it,
Speaker 1: but you don't actually pick it up. Yeah, don't know
Speaker 1: what you're talking about.
Speaker 3: Me where these things, my friends where it would be
Speaker 3: like if you had went to go pick up your
Speaker 3: dog shit.
Speaker 2: Everyone someone would fill me been.
Speaker 3: Like, oh.
Speaker 2: So childish.
Speaker 1: There is still so from when Matt and I like
Speaker 1: when The Bachelor was on air a million years ago.
Speaker 1: Now there is still Pat pictures and it's a series
Speaker 1: of Pat pictures of just of me picking.
Speaker 2: Up dog shit. That's good gear.
Speaker 1: And it was a full Daily Mail article just about
Speaker 1: me being environmentally conscious and how I clean up after
Speaker 1: my dog.
Speaker 2: So if anyone know you eat it after.
Speaker 1: Tough times back.
Speaker 2: Then, yeah, I feel like.
Speaker 3: With dog shit is if you don't pick it up,
Speaker 3: you're just going to step in it along the line.
Speaker 3: It's a cycle.
Speaker 2: I think like karma, it's karma.
Speaker 1: I saw this fantastic TikTok or Instagram or something the
Speaker 1: other day and this mum was talking about how she
Speaker 1: was going through the stage of potty training, right, and
Speaker 1: she said, the thing that's the hardest is when you
Speaker 1: know that your kid has done a shit somewhere, but
Speaker 1: you just don't know where, right, so I can smell it,
Speaker 1: I know that it's happened.
Speaker 2: You become a bloodhound like a truffle pig.
Speaker 1: So she was walking around the house documenting like where
Speaker 1: is the turd?
Speaker 2: Where is it? It's got to be somewhere. That'd be
Speaker 2: a really good idea for a book. And where's the book?
Speaker 2: Where's the turd?
Speaker 1: And the little boy has fallen asleep. He's asleep like
Speaker 1: next to the couch, so he hasn't fallen asleep in
Speaker 1: his bed. He's asleep just like next to the couch
Speaker 1: on the ground. The mom's walking around trying to find
Speaker 1: the pooh oh. She finds it. It's in his hands,
Speaker 1: holding on to it next.
Speaker 2: To his head.
Speaker 1: I'll try and find this. It was absolute goal.
Speaker 2: How comforting.
Speaker 1: You know how kids have that aversion where they think
Speaker 1: it's theirs, like they sometimes kids get upset when you
Speaker 1: flush it down a toilet or whatever because it's their
Speaker 1: part of their body.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so he was just holding on I store all
Speaker 2: my semen, jess face. Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Speaker 1: Where do you put it?
Speaker 2: Where do you put it? Never you mind? Yeah? Sorry?
Speaker 1: To sell it on only fans, you would do something.
Speaker 1: It would be a slide business completely.
Speaker 2: There's no swimmers in there, I know.
Speaker 1: But it's like the woman who sells her farts like
Speaker 1: it's of no use, but like someone buys it really
Speaker 1: there's a woman on Yeah, there's a selles of farts. Yeah,
Speaker 1: there's another person that they're unfit sweat the dark holes
Speaker 1: I go down on the internet.
Speaker 2: You never you mind? How much money can I make?
Speaker 2: Do you think?
Speaker 1: I don't know?
Speaker 2: Ash?
Speaker 1: How much did you make from selling.
Speaker 2: Feet of your business? None of your business anyway?
Speaker 3: So yeah, Like I know, when when I changed Macy's nappy,
Speaker 3: if she's done it, she won't she has to pull
Speaker 3: it in nappy still.
Speaker 2: She might be sitting on the toilet, but she has
Speaker 2: to be wearing an appy. Oh the comfort. Yeah, But
Speaker 2: I like whenever I try and change it, she's like
Speaker 2: I want to see it, you know, like there's a
Speaker 2: there's a connection that they have with it.
Speaker 1: I think every parent can like remember that, or if
Speaker 1: they're going through themselves now, like the time when your
Speaker 1: kid's doing that transition of toilet training and they want
Speaker 1: you to put a nappy back on them so that
Speaker 1: they can go and do a poo. So you put
Speaker 1: a nappy on them, and then they'll go and hide
Speaker 1: behind the couch and go red face. But you know
Speaker 1: that that's what they're doing. But they need the security
Speaker 1: of the nappy because yeah, poo's are just a whole
Speaker 1: nother kettle of fish.
Speaker 3: So Macie will go into and for some reason she
Speaker 3: picks our bedroom to be her place to pooh. I
Speaker 3: would too, Yeah, just shit on my fucking pillow, not
Speaker 3: your pillow.
Speaker 1: It's just a it's comforting, you know, being close to
Speaker 1: mom and dad.
Speaker 2: And she can't it's a vulnerable moment. She can't pronounce
Speaker 2: the letter T, so like I'll come up the hallway
Speaker 2: and I hear this not yep. She's not ready for
Speaker 2: me to change it, so she's like, not yep, not yep,
Speaker 2: and then I'll walk in and it will fucking s.
Speaker 1: So Macy is the sweetest little thing.
Speaker 2: She is cute.
Speaker 1: She's so cute.
Speaker 2: She is cute.
Speaker 1: Can you get a record of not yep, going there
Speaker 1: somewhere the cuteness that is little she is.
Speaker 3: Yeah, she's she's very she's very cute. At the moment,
Speaker 3: she's sort of trying to say more words like Oscar
Speaker 3: was such a yapper. He is a yapper like his dad.
Speaker 3: It's just fucking yeap, yep. Yeah, I'm just like, fuck me, He's.
Speaker 2: Like, do you know what he's like?
Speaker 3: So my grandmother can talk the leg off a chair. Literally,
Speaker 3: she can talk underwater with a mouthful of marbles.
Speaker 2: He's just like that.
Speaker 1: Well, at least you know that he's got some good genes.
Speaker 1: At least you know that that's your son.
Speaker 2: Maybe I don't know where she came from. She's a
Speaker 2: ginger and she's white as a goat. She glows in
Speaker 2: the dark.
Speaker 1: Even I was suspicious.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was like, that's the that's the milkman's.
Speaker 1: People explained herself on this one. Yet, Yeah, getting canceled.
Speaker 1: I do hope that I don't get you guys cancer
Speaker 1: And Matt's done a.
Speaker 2: Really good It's meant to be, is it? It doesn't matter.
Speaker 1: I have a question for you, and it's I wonder
Speaker 1: if it's something you've experienced with your kids. So, and
Speaker 1: I know I talk about Lola a lot, and that's
Speaker 1: probably because Molly's Molly is like quite reliable. She kind
Speaker 1: of doesn't do anything that's outside the ordinary in terms
Speaker 1: of like she's very consistent in her behavior and in
Speaker 1: her personality. She really and she's like it's in the
Speaker 1: way she gets ricky because I'm a creature habit, and
Speaker 1: that's a creature the same I am too. I'm like,
Speaker 1: same lunch every day, Like I am such a person
Speaker 1: that likes to do the same thing on repeat.
Speaker 2: Like a serial killer.
Speaker 1: Yeah, really similar, similar traits when I think about it,
Speaker 1: And I've always identified just.
Speaker 2: To listen to if I go missing. You know, the
Speaker 2: number one suspect is go on.
Speaker 1: Well, okay, So Marley's consistent. She also is like a
Speaker 1: little bit of a you know, an A plus student
Speaker 1: kind of thing. Like she's very smart.
Speaker 2: She's a very humble brag. This is a humble parent.
Speaker 1: My child's genius.
Speaker 2: She's so clever.
Speaker 1: Whereas Lola's a bit more radical. You don't know what
Speaker 1: you're going to get from her, right, Like she is
Speaker 1: the outlier and it keeps life interesting. And I think
Speaker 1: it's a second child thing, but who knows, it could
Speaker 1: just be the wild card of parenting. So Lola is
Speaker 1: now in a phase where if she hurts me, I'm
Speaker 1: in the wrong. So she scratched my face yesterday. She
Speaker 1: got so angry at me that she she lashed and
Speaker 1: scratched my face. This was preceding her screaming I want
Speaker 1: my daddy. She she did it to the cat and
Speaker 1: I said, don't do that to the cat. So then
Speaker 1: she turned around and did it to my face, and
Speaker 1: I was like, hey, like, we don't do that, and
Speaker 1: that really hurt. Like I got upset because she got
Speaker 1: me straight in the eye, but I didn't get angry.
Speaker 1: I didn't yell.
Speaker 2: I was just like, WHOA like that?
Speaker 1: No, No, I didn't.
Speaker 2: I was really like, WHOA like that? Like, you don't
Speaker 2: do that.
Speaker 1: That hurt mummy, Like mummy, Mummy's upset. That hurt me.
Speaker 1: And her response was.
Speaker 2: Yo, hurt me, and shet Emotionally.
Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah, like I manipulated her because my hurt
Speaker 1: upset her. So then now she storms off and she
Speaker 1: manages to twist a situation.
Speaker 2: Gaslighted, just gas gas it by four year old, just
Speaker 2: manipulating the whole household.
Speaker 1: So she manages to I mean, obviously, don't apologize. I'm
Speaker 1: not like a battered mom. But at the same time,
Speaker 1: I'm like, how do I explain to you that actually
Speaker 1: you're not always the one that's the victim in every
Speaker 1: situation challenging?
Speaker 2: I don't know neither. I don't think I'm doing a
Speaker 2: good job this parenting thing.
Speaker 3: I remember Macey hit April once at the beach, which
Speaker 3: tiny little Mazy.
Speaker 2: It was like.
Speaker 3: She patted April and shop technically she patted April on
Speaker 3: the back, but like it was at the beach, so
Speaker 3: like skin it was made a slap. And I think
Speaker 3: like Macy's the one who cries. They might be embarrassed
Speaker 3: that they know they've done the wrong thing in front
Speaker 3: of you or to you.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, but it's not and I'm sorry.
Speaker 2: Cry, it's you hurt me. Cry.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but I think I'm angry you make me feel bad.
Speaker 3: I think that's a knee jerk trigger response because they
Speaker 3: don't understand the emotion or what it's called. I think
Speaker 3: they feel like I know when Oscar accidentally the other
Speaker 3: he poked me in the eye. It was it was
Speaker 3: a blatant accident. And my reactions straight away because because
Speaker 3: it fucking hurts you get poked in the eye. You've
Speaker 3: only got two of them, and you can lose them
Speaker 3: pretty quickly.
Speaker 2: I reckon.
Speaker 1: I can imagine you were upset.
Speaker 2: They're bits of jelly in your head.
Speaker 1: We're all we all know what I balls up.
Speaker 3: If someone put their mouth over your eye and sucked
Speaker 3: hard enough, it had come out. That's what we're dealing
Speaker 3: with here.
Speaker 1: I don't think that's true.
Speaker 2: Would should we try go yet?
Speaker 3: Anyway, he poked me in the eye and it was
Speaker 3: an accident, but my knee jerk response was oh fuck,
Speaker 3: and he got really upset, like you saw it.
Speaker 2: No, I didn't swear. I actually didn't say fuck. I
Speaker 2: just said that for comedic effect. I was like ah.
Speaker 2: I was like ah, noticeably it hurt and it was
Speaker 2: clearly an accident.
Speaker 3: But he then got upset around me, like I forced
Speaker 3: his finger into my eye, and I think it's the
Speaker 3: same thing. I think maybe she doesn't know the response
Speaker 3: or the emotion. I'm just going to get more upset.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like I'm going to get upset because then
Speaker 1: it counteracts.
Speaker 2: It's like, yeah, I don't know how to react when
Speaker 2: I've done the wrong thing. So instead I screamed for
Speaker 2: my father, who I actually don't want to know actual more.
Speaker 2: If he was here, I hit him too.
Speaker 1: Poor Matt got it. Yeah, he really drew the short
Speaker 1: I miss him, and he drew the short straw with that.
Speaker 1: And I know that we're making jokes now, but in
Speaker 1: a week's time I'm going to be so sad. I
Speaker 1: am a pathetic puddle without that man, never leave me, Matt.
Speaker 1: When you listen to this, all right.
Speaker 2: I hope you anyway, we're going on track it. I've
Speaker 2: got a scenario. I want to run by you.
Speaker 3: Great, that happened, not to me, I witnessed it. I'm
Speaker 3: a good people watcher. I love people from the bush.
Speaker 2: That's that's a peeping tom. That's different. You look outside,
Speaker 2: you you can.
Speaker 1: Get that in the suburbs down by someone's house.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, through the window when they're in the shower.
Speaker 2: It wasn't me. I just happened to witness it while
Speaker 2: I was stalking someone masturbating. Sorry, yes I was. We
Speaker 2: were at the park and.
Speaker 3: This particular park has a basketball court next to it.
Speaker 3: It's a half court just to paint your picture, thank you.
Speaker 2: And there's it's not overly busy.
Speaker 3: There's a teenager I'm going to say teenager here's probably twenty,
Speaker 3: that's how old I feel.
Speaker 2: I am him and his girlfriend.
Speaker 3: And he was playing on the basketball court along with
Speaker 3: another little boy that had a ball.
Speaker 2: And then there was a mom there right with her pram.
Speaker 3: She had a baby in the pram and she had
Speaker 3: a smaller kid about Macy's age two or three.
Speaker 2: Around there somewhere the smaller ones out of the pram.
Speaker 3: But the lady was standing in the middle of the
Speaker 3: basketball court, directly below the hoop pretty march. Why I
Speaker 3: don't know, with her pram and her two year old
Speaker 3: kid that's running around and so.
Speaker 1: Wait, was there another kid that was in the pram
Speaker 1: or the two year old kid was the kid that
Speaker 1: was in the prem I.
Speaker 3: Know there was a smaller baby babies. She's standing there
Speaker 3: in the middle of the basketball court used predominantly for basketball,
Speaker 3: and there are people trying to There's a guy trying
Speaker 3: I watched him for a while because he was like
Speaker 3: talking to his girlfriend and then saw they were there
Speaker 3: and waited, like politely waited and was like, I want
Speaker 3: to play.
Speaker 2: I'm here to play basketball. You're in the basketball court.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And then he's gone, fuck it. He started to
Speaker 3: bounce the well just around to sort of give the
Speaker 3: idea that you're in the middle of the basketball court here.
Speaker 3: I know, your kids running circles around the thing.
Speaker 2: Whatever. There's a whole playground right there for that sort
Speaker 2: of stuff.
Speaker 3: And then he sort of stands next to them a
Speaker 3: little bit like as he's kind of like edging them
Speaker 3: out to be like, can you if a ball hits
Speaker 3: your kid, it'll probably not the kid out.
Speaker 2: You're standing in the wrong spot.
Speaker 3: And she he has just completely ignored him, and he's
Speaker 3: gone to thrown the ball into the hoop okay and
Speaker 3: she turns to him and goes, you could hit my
Speaker 3: kid with that ball, and he and I watched it.
Speaker 3: He stood his ground. He said, this is a basketball court.
Speaker 3: And she's like, you need to be more careful. You
Speaker 3: need to be more careful. You could have hit my
Speaker 3: kid with your ball. Blah blah blah blah blah if
Speaker 3: it wasn't a basketball court and there's a ball flying
Speaker 3: around and we.
Speaker 1: All know how much you like basketball. I love so
Speaker 1: I understand got to shoot some hoops.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And he stood that.
Speaker 3: He stood his ground and was like, Hey, you are
Speaker 3: standing beneath a hoop okay with a pram with a
Speaker 3: newborn pretty much a baby in it, and you're letting
Speaker 3: your two year old run around on a basketball court
Speaker 3: with no basketball, and then you want to have a
Speaker 3: dig at me for doing what the purpose of this is.
Speaker 1: I have a question for you, what side of this
Speaker 1: argument do you sit on.
Speaker 2: I'm on the I'm on the guy kid who wanted
Speaker 2: to play basketball side.
Speaker 1: I am, but I think he went about it the way.
Speaker 1: I think he lacks the ability to have a conversation.
Speaker 1: I think the smarter way would have just been, hey,
Speaker 1: do you mind moving? There's a playground right there, and
Speaker 1: he's perfect and we want to play. I'm also saying
Speaker 1: he's a teenager too. Yeah, I know, I get that,
Speaker 1: But I also think that like, just because you might
Speaker 1: technically be in the right, doing something that then puts
Speaker 1: someone in danger puts you in the wrong. That's the problem, right,
Speaker 1: It's like the way, it's the reaction to the problem
Speaker 1: that then means she probably reacted in a way that
Speaker 1: she wouldn't have had he just said, Oh, we want
Speaker 1: to play basketball, could you move?
Speaker 2: Yeah? I also think like some self awareness.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and I and I do genuinely think and this
Speaker 1: might get me in trouble from like other moms maybe,
Speaker 1: but they're they're definitely our parents who think that them
Speaker 1: being parents is the most important thing, Like that they're
Speaker 1: that there's this sense of like, well, I have a baby,
Speaker 1: and I have a pram, especially a really little baby,
Speaker 1: you kind of expect that everyone else gets out of
Speaker 1: the way for you, I think to some degree, and
Speaker 1: it doesn't always work like that. So maybe she is
Speaker 1: someone who has that sense of entitlement. Yeah, but yeah, no,
Speaker 1: I don't think that in that situation. I am completely
Speaker 1: on his side. I just think you went about the wrong.
Speaker 2: Way for sure. For sure, I felt I feel like
Speaker 2: anything communicated with communication, right, But then it just comes
Speaker 2: down into a pram.
Speaker 3: You're standing directly under a fucking basketball hoop, for God's sake,
Speaker 3: with a baby in your pram and your two year
Speaker 3: old running a mark next to a playground where they
Speaker 3: can do that stuff safely.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I understand your fury. I am on your side.
Speaker 3: She this is the thing, right she She stormed off
Speaker 3: after pulling the I'm the mum card, stormed off, sort
Speaker 3: of passed me and looked.
Speaker 2: At me to be like, I'm on your side. I
Speaker 2: was like, oh, I just don't make eye contact.
Speaker 1: I yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 1: If my thing is is like maybe I would have
Speaker 1: reacted like her as well. I think I not on purpose,
Speaker 1: only because like if I'd done something like that without realizing,
Speaker 1: but then a kid who is still a kid, like
Speaker 1: a young guy, reacted in a way that was a
Speaker 1: bit reckless. I probably would have turned around and pulled
Speaker 1: the mum card of like fucking grow up, you little shit.
Speaker 2: You know, at the same time, you've got to be
Speaker 2: You've got to be like, it's not all about me.
Speaker 1: Can I tell you one time that I was feeled?
Speaker 1: I mean, I probably could just say this, So I've
Speaker 1: got actually content to talk about the next time on
Speaker 1: this podcast.
Speaker 2: But whatever, I'll blome a load the nut of content.
Speaker 1: The one thing that, like I thought it was that
Speaker 1: next to mat sorry, the one thing, the one thing
Speaker 1: that comes to mind when I think about like being
Speaker 1: absolutely enraged as a parent, like like to the point
Speaker 1: where I was like I wanted I've never been so
Speaker 1: angry that I wanted to hurt another person, right, And
Speaker 1: I was like, I'm gonna spit on this girl. I
Speaker 1: was furious. I'm want to break her windscreen wipers. Like
Speaker 1: it was road rage as well, so like like a
Speaker 1: different kind of rage when you're like it's like a
Speaker 1: you can't even describe its.
Speaker 2: Behind a windscreen.
Speaker 1: So Lola was a newborn baby. Well, actually that's a lie.
Speaker 1: She must have been Oh when was it okay? Irrelevant?
Speaker 1: She was little, she was little. I had Marley in
Speaker 1: the car as well, and we were driving around. It
Speaker 1: was like peak fucking Christmas. So she must have been
Speaker 1: like ten months then, so or nine months. It was
Speaker 1: peak Christmas time. We were trying to drive around to
Speaker 1: find a car park in Bonnet Junction. I had been
Speaker 1: driving around for forty five fucking minutes and this was
Speaker 1: like Christmas Eve with two kids in the car. Don't
Speaker 1: ask me why I was doing it, but I was.
Speaker 1: Marley's screaming, Lola's screaming. All I needed to do was
Speaker 1: duck in and get one thing. And I had been
Speaker 1: circling around where the parent's parking the cars are anyway,
Speaker 1: I had my indicator on to go into this car park,
Speaker 1: and this other woman just zipped in and took the parent,
Speaker 1: like the woman with PRAMS. It's got a picture of Prams.
Speaker 1: She zipped in and took it. And I then, like,
Speaker 1: I obviously caught around and I was like, oh my.
Speaker 1: I was like, dude, I have two kids in the car.
Speaker 2: You can hear them.
Speaker 1: You could see I was going into that park and
Speaker 1: you just took it. And she goes, well, that's your
Speaker 1: fault for having children, and I.
Speaker 2: Was like, well, Oh my god, that's warranted.
Speaker 1: That's just my rudeness, so angry.
Speaker 2: That is outright, that's outrageous.
Speaker 1: I called Matt and I was like, I am going
Speaker 1: to snap this woman's windscreen wipers off, and he was like,
Speaker 1: don't do it. And I was like, I'm going to
Speaker 1: buy a smoothie and throw it on her window, and
Speaker 1: he was like, don't do it. He talked me back
Speaker 1: off a ledge. Oh my god, but that is my
Speaker 1: Roman empire. I think of that moment all the time
Speaker 1: all the time. I'm not a rage filled person.
Speaker 3: No, I know.
Speaker 1: I know that, and I wanted to physically armor.
Speaker 2: Yeah, look I think that. Look, that's just straight up rudeness.
Speaker 2: I was like, I wish your mum never had a child.
Speaker 1: I think she was swallowed.
Speaker 2: I was. I was filled with I was filled with it.
Speaker 2: I could have wow, so many, so many. And there's
Speaker 2: the thing when you think back that you think what
Speaker 2: I could have done, But I should have said what
Speaker 2: I can say. So when he missed.
Speaker 1: Opportunity, I said nothing because I was so startled, and
Speaker 1: then all of the responses came to me.
Speaker 2: For weeks afterwards.
Speaker 1: I'd be in a shower brushing my teeth, and I'd
Speaker 1: be like, Laura, Yes, it's time for some listener questions.
Speaker 2: Yes, it is good. You read my mind, right, I've
Speaker 2: got one for you. Okay, So this comes off the.
Speaker 1: Back of a do you call this ask two doting darts? No,
Speaker 1: just listen to questions.
Speaker 2: Just listen to question.
Speaker 1: Should get a name for this segment asking cart's good?
Speaker 2: Can you cut that out? All right? What do you
Speaker 2: have for me? Okay?
Speaker 3: So we have a guest on the podcast at a
Speaker 3: while back, Steph Claiar Smith, who is currently pregnant.
Speaker 1: There has never been a more attractive pregnant person like
Speaker 1: she just frighteningly. I never knew I was attractive to
Speaker 1: pregnant women, but here we are.
Speaker 3: I know, like like she popped out so like perfectly forward.
Speaker 3: If she was if you looking at her from the
Speaker 3: from the back, you'd be like, oh, there's Steph. And
Speaker 3: then she's like, oh, I got you're pregnant. Yes, yes,
Speaker 3: off the bait. And she's having trouble with her eldest
Speaker 3: child his name, Yes, she hasn't asked me and asked
Speaker 3: this question.
Speaker 2: But notice that she's having problems with his sleep and
Speaker 2: how clingy he is.
Speaker 3: But we have had a question from a listener similar circumstance,
Speaker 3: so I thought we'd touch on it now.
Speaker 2: The question.
Speaker 1: I knew that Steph Klasmith really wanted advice from us,
Speaker 1: so I'm.
Speaker 2: Glad that she doesn't want to advice from us. She
Speaker 2: might from you, not from me. I think she's doing
Speaker 2: just fine.
Speaker 3: Yes, So the question is, I'm currently pregnant with my
Speaker 3: second child. My first, who is four, is acting very clingy.
Speaker 3: They won't let me go to sleep.
Speaker 2: What do I do?
Speaker 1: Oh man, that's so hard. I mean, there's probably lots
Speaker 1: of things that you can do in this situation. I
Speaker 1: would probably check, like as in, like, you know, have
Speaker 1: a little mental check and see if you think you're
Speaker 1: spending enough one on one time with them, because big
Speaker 1: changes happening. Kids don't understand what that change is, but
Speaker 1: they know that a baby's coming, which means less attention
Speaker 1: for them, less time for them, and that mum's occupied
Speaker 1: with something else, you know, and there's lots of excitement
Speaker 1: talking about this new baby. But I think because like
Speaker 1: Maley and Laula are really close in age, and I
Speaker 1: think one thing that helped us was getting Maley excited
Speaker 1: about being a big sister and about all the things
Speaker 1: that it's going to mean for her as well.
Speaker 2: That's not to say that once.
Speaker 1: Laula came, like she was so jealous and it was
Speaker 1: really hard, and we had loads of those clinging periods,
Speaker 1: but trying to make it more about her rather than
Speaker 1: about the baby. And also the second thing that we
Speaker 1: had to do, which helped, like I can't even tell
Speaker 1: you how much it helped, was just me having really
Speaker 1: like designated one on one time with Marley, so like
Speaker 1: I would take Marley to go and get her nails done,
Speaker 1: or I would take Maley for a walk just us,
Speaker 1: so we'd go get ice cream. And I know that,
Speaker 1: like you obviously can't just leave the baby at home
Speaker 1: because it's in your belly, but it's like just not
Speaker 1: with dad, having time just the two of you where
Speaker 1: you don't talk about the baby, you don't talk about pregnancy,
Speaker 1: and you just focus on them and their little wants
Speaker 1: and needs. Like I don't know, I think that that's
Speaker 1: probably all you can do. Like it's only going to
Speaker 1: be a couple of months, it's a phase.
Speaker 3: But the fact that like not letting mum go to sleep, yeah,
Speaker 3: that means everyone's tired in the house. At what point
Speaker 3: did you just go jump in to bed with me
Speaker 3: and that your time and create that bad habit.
Speaker 2: But then then you've got.
Speaker 1: To break note because then you've got to break that
Speaker 1: habit once baby comes along, and then that's like hell
Speaker 1: on earth, literally hell on earth. I also that kind
Speaker 1: of question in this time. I think we can all
Speaker 1: do it where like, when you're pregnant, everything it almost
Speaker 1: becomes part of your personality, right, Like your personality becomes
Speaker 1: that you're pregnant. Everyone talks about your pregnancy, everyone's asking
Speaker 1: about it. It's like all of the focus goes from
Speaker 1: everything else in the world to the fact that you're pregnant.
Speaker 1: That's like a really exciting thing. And I wonder if
Speaker 1: like you're little kid is picking up on that and
Speaker 1: they feel a little bit like, Okay, well, the most
Speaker 1: exciting thing that's happening in.
Speaker 2: Mum's life is that mum's pregnant. Yeah, what about me? Yeah?
Speaker 1: And everyone's talking about the pregnancy and we're always talking
Speaker 1: about the baby. But like, but like I'm here, you know,
Speaker 1: and kids are like in built. It's a I was
Speaker 1: actually listening. It's probably going too deep, but whatever, we'll
Speaker 1: go there. I was listening to a child psychologist talk
Speaker 1: about how siblings are actually really in competition with each other,
Speaker 1: Like as much as they love each other, they also
Speaker 1: see each other as like a direct threat, a direct threat,
Speaker 1: a direct threat to their attention source, or a direct
Speaker 1: threat to the thing that keeps them safe and makes
Speaker 1: them feel loved. And so it's almost like it's started already,
Speaker 1: but for you, it's just the baby's not born yet,
Speaker 1: but that direct threat is still there that you know,
Speaker 1: that little child still knows fuck, like, I gotta work
Speaker 1: so much harder for mum's attention now.
Speaker 2: So it's like all the attention has been taken away
Speaker 2: from you when it's been with you for the whole time.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, I look back on having Lola and
Speaker 1: I My biggest regret is that I think I loved
Speaker 1: it at the time, the idea of having them really
Speaker 1: close together, and I love it now, But when they
Speaker 1: were really little, I found that it made Marley grow
Speaker 1: up too quickly and she no longer was the baby,
Speaker 1: even though I look back on photos and I'm like,
Speaker 1: holy shit, you're in a nappy, you were a baby.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, they were only nineteen months apart or something,
Speaker 1: and I think that that was a bit unfair on
Speaker 1: her because she didn't get to be the baby for
Speaker 1: very long, and she kind of got thrusted onto Matt
Speaker 1: and I took Lola, and I don't know. I now
Speaker 1: look back and I understand why she had the moments
Speaker 1: of like neediness that she had, But at the time,
Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god, this is so hard.
Speaker 1: Get off me, Let me go to sleep. You know,
Speaker 1: it's hell on earth when you don't get sleep.
Speaker 2: It's the worst. It's the worst part of those early
Speaker 2: years of parenting.
Speaker 3: Yeah, So do you think that, like maybe the work
Speaker 3: can be done during the day, spend just a little
Speaker 3: bit more one on one time and make it about them,
Speaker 3: you know, doing that last bed bath routine that you
Speaker 3: would do with them one.
Speaker 1: Hundred percent one on one time. And if that doesn't work, melotonin.
Speaker 2: Forever, I'm still sleep with my mum, you would.
Speaker 1: Both the kids are in the bed now with me.
Speaker 1: Now that Matt's not here, Oh yeah, as soon as I.
Speaker 2: Go away or I'm not there for the night or
Speaker 2: whatever it might be. Oscar's he's got yeah, he's there.
Speaker 2: He's like, what do you mean you're away tonight, like you.
Speaker 1: Bear, your spot is still warm, and Oscar just like
Speaker 1: slides on in. I just worry, like when Matt comes home,
Speaker 1: he's never going to be able to sleep in the
Speaker 1: bed again.
Speaker 2: We've gone back to square one. That's the dream. I'm
Speaker 2: going to finish the episode now, I'm nervous.
Speaker 1: What are you nervous about?
Speaker 2: Don't know what we do at the end. What do
Speaker 2: you do? We all get naked, just your first she's
Speaker 2: back there to work and he's just.
Speaker 1: Naked the whole time.
Speaker 2: You can only see from the neck up.
Speaker 1: Anyway, guys, that is it from us. Thank you for
Speaker 1: having me on the podcast.
Speaker 2: Yes, you'll be back next week. I will be so.
Speaker 2: If you do have questions for Laura on the Facebook
Speaker 2: group I've asked.
Speaker 1: Maybe I'll put up a question box as well. If
Speaker 1: you have any parenting to any dad questions that you
Speaker 1: want a mom to answer, I'm here, cheeky plug. If
Speaker 1: I've enjoyed this episode, please leave review five stars. If
Speaker 1: you're going to leave a review, you'd hope it's five stars.
Speaker 1: Anything less than that would be annoying, wouldn't it is?
Speaker 3: With this one, we got one saying get your own
Speaker 3: slogan and it was like, must be nice.
Speaker 2: It was so fun.
Speaker 1: I did read that. I did.
Speaker 2: Did you see the one that was just like no,
Speaker 2: it was one star anyway?
Speaker 3: That is it Join us on socials as well, two
Speaker 3: doting dads on Instagram, like I said, the Facebook group
Speaker 3: also TikTok. We also have a couple of calendars there
Speaker 3: where else can I plug in this little section here?
Speaker 1: You do. There's actually quite a few of the raunchy
Speaker 1: ranch calendars that are at my house currently. And I
Speaker 1: think that if you want to get someone at present
Speaker 1: in January, now is the time to get a calendar
Speaker 1: to get your life in order for twenty twenty five.
Speaker 1: Just never mind the little typo one March. Apart from that,
Speaker 1: it is perfect well said. It's a beautiful, beautiful calendar also,
Speaker 1: and I think before we wrap this up, we have
Speaker 1: a very very important request.
Speaker 2: Please go and vote for my husband.
Speaker 1: Whether you've enjoyed this or not, if you've really enjoyed it,
Speaker 1: the way to keep that away longer is by going
Speaker 1: joining I think it's ten play. You've got to sign
Speaker 1: up and you can vote for Mattie Jay in the jungle.
Speaker 1: Let's see him eat a zebra asshole. It'll make everyone happy.
Speaker 1: Session with this zebra assholes running, it's kind of just
Speaker 1: a rotting joke with Matt and I.
Speaker 2: I want to actually get him a zebra's asshole.
Speaker 1: That's it from us.
Speaker 2: See, Hey guys, I'm trying to get pregnant, are you?
Speaker 2: I'll tell you with a baster.
Speaker 1: Matt just is we're using we're using condoms. So when
Speaker 1: I just go and fish them out of the bin,
Speaker 1: that's a lot I don't two. Doting Dance Podcast acknowledges
Speaker 1: the traditional custodians of country throughout Australia and the connections
Speaker 1: to land, see and community.
Speaker 3: We pay our respects to their elders past and present
Speaker 3: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestraate island
Speaker 3: the peoples today