Speaker 1: Hey, it's Pats with another episode of Rage Against the Menopause,
Speaker 1: this one with another one of my favorite women, bridget
Speaker 1: To Chloe. I've worked with Bridgie and Top Rating Radio.
Speaker 1: She's one of Australia's most successful and much love personalities.
Speaker 1: But away from the studio, to know Bridge really is
Speaker 1: to love her whyse beyond her years, She's always had
Speaker 1: words of advice about all aspects of life, and I
Speaker 1: regard her as one of the original trailblazers, a woman
Speaker 1: who broke through the glass ceiling, dominating in what was
Speaker 1: once a man's world. I've always admired the way she
Speaker 1: reinvents herself. Currently a presenter on ABC Radio, also an
Speaker 1: accredited counselor with her own practice, I think you'll also
Speaker 1: find her a valuable addition to this series. Enjoy an invisible.
Speaker 2: Age, Menopause. It's coming for you no matter what.
Speaker 3: Let's build a village of support.
Speaker 2: Why is it so damn hut in here?
Speaker 3: Menopause is so hot right now?
Speaker 2: I think I'm finally in menopause.
Speaker 3: Women just want to feel heard.
Speaker 4: Rage Against the Menopause a very special guest for Rage
Speaker 4: Against the Menopause, and.
Speaker 3: This is a beautiful, beautiful.
Speaker 4: Soul who I had the honor of working with several
Speaker 4: years ago, an absolute legend in radio and TV.
Speaker 2: Bridget To Cloak, Welcome pets. It's so nice to see you.
Speaker 2: And now you're an award winner. I'm in very very
Speaker 2: esteemed company. I must say no about that.
Speaker 4: So thrilled that you could could join us. You have
Speaker 4: had a career change. You had thirty years in TV
Speaker 4: and radio. I read your news when you were Bridge
Speaker 4: and Limo won Gold FM.
Speaker 2: Yes you did, and we had a wonderful time doing that.
Speaker 2: Then sadly I got sacked and thought what the hell
Speaker 2: am I going to do with myself? But good I'd
Speaker 2: had a great un so, you know, thirty years in
Speaker 2: radio was pretty amazing. So yeah, I went back to UNI,
Speaker 2: which was incredibly difficult. As a fifty plus I bear
Speaker 2: something or other, couldn't remember how to write any sale
Speaker 2: or do anything anyway. Thankfully I had two adult kids. Yeah,
Speaker 2: so I went back and did a post grade counseling degree.
Speaker 2: So I'm now practicing as a counselor, which is very
Speaker 2: very different too.
Speaker 4: It is, but you know what, I'm not surprised that
Speaker 4: you've gone into this field because knowing you, being fortunate
Speaker 4: and blessed enough to know you, you have always always.
Speaker 3: Had a heart of gold.
Speaker 2: No, you have.
Speaker 4: And I remember when I was diagnosed with cancer, so
Speaker 4: nine nearly. Would you believe a decade ago Audrey was three?
Speaker 4: You remember Audrey as.
Speaker 3: A top I know, and you know how our whole world, Chris,
Speaker 3: our whole world had been turned upside down and shaken.
Speaker 3: And you came to my doorstep out in the western summers.
Speaker 3: You're like an hour away from home.
Speaker 4: You had all this beautiful cooking and you just sat
Speaker 4: and talked to me for like two or three hours.
Speaker 4: And you know, the biggest gift you can give some
Speaker 4: one is your time.
Speaker 2: And I'll never forget you. That's exactly what you do
Speaker 2: as well. So it was a very easy thing to
Speaker 2: do for someone like you.
Speaker 3: No, I've never forgotten it. It's just meant so much.
Speaker 2: It just made a lot, doesn't it. Things like that,
Speaker 2: There's no doubt about it.
Speaker 3: It does. And people, I guess too, people don't.
Speaker 4: Always know how to respond or what is the right
Speaker 4: thing to say, but sometimes just being present.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I've really learned that actually in my journey because
Speaker 2: a lot of people who come to see me say
Speaker 2: no one talks to me about it, and it's like
Speaker 2: and I try and explain it. It's often they it's
Speaker 2: their own uncomfortability. You know what to do, what to say,
Speaker 2: abound with you. I think always I say this to
Speaker 2: my kids too. The best thing you can do is
Speaker 2: say something, do something and go from there, but don't
Speaker 2: just leave it.
Speaker 3: But you didn't have to do that. And it was
Speaker 3: just thrilled to go to wheer Aby.
Speaker 4: It's very affluent out that way, not quite affluent as well, but.
Speaker 3: It meant so much because you know, I've always looked up,
Speaker 3: always looked up to you.
Speaker 4: You're so legendary and what you've done in mediawat.
Speaker 3: And for you to reach out like that, it meant
Speaker 3: a lot.
Speaker 4: And so it doesn't surprise me that you've gone into
Speaker 4: counseling because you've always had a heart of goals. You've
Speaker 4: all you know, the woman behind the persona of the
Speaker 4: media personality with the high profile. There's a beautiful soul
Speaker 4: in there and I'm so thrilled that everyone gets to
Speaker 4: benefit from.
Speaker 3: That, all your clients in your business.
Speaker 2: You're a darling. Thank you. Look, I'm really enjoying it.
Speaker 2: It's it's a very very demanding because you've got people's
Speaker 2: lives in your hands to a certain extent. I mean,
Speaker 2: I don't mean obviously medically or anything, but there's a
Speaker 2: lot going on out there, particularly since COVID. I so
Speaker 2: a lot of anxiety, a lot of depression, a lot
Speaker 2: of couples having problems. So I am really enjoying. I'm
Speaker 2: really enjoying doing it. It's it's great when you get
Speaker 2: a good result and you feel like you're making a difference.
Speaker 2: Sometimes it's really difficult, but yeah, no, look it's been
Speaker 2: it's been interesting and great and I'm you know, I'm
Speaker 2: proud of myself for being able to change careers because
Speaker 2: I could have just curled up in a ball and
Speaker 2: never got up again, which was tempting for a couple
Speaker 2: of days.
Speaker 3: Well, you know, radio can be brutal. Media can be
Speaker 3: absolutely brutal.
Speaker 4: And it's like it's that creative sphere, isn't it, where
Speaker 4: you just pour your heart And so especially with Brecky Radio,
Speaker 4: you bring your whole life to the show, don't you overshare?
Speaker 2: That's really dood to do.
Speaker 3: And so it does feel like you've been cut off
Speaker 3: at the knees.
Speaker 2: No, it was a terrible shock. But I look back
Speaker 2: at it now and I think, look, there's a lot
Speaker 2: of lot I could have done differently. But I do
Speaker 2: think I've never better about it because I think I
Speaker 2: am so lucky to have worked in the media when
Speaker 2: I did for as long as I did, and I
Speaker 2: think I just feel grateful for it. So I think
Speaker 2: that's helped with getting over the I think the shock
Speaker 2: and the grief. It's grief losing something that was like
Speaker 2: losing it, right, do you think?
Speaker 4: I always say, but I don't know how true it is.
Speaker 4: It doesn't define no who I am, but does it?
Speaker 2: Well? I always said that too, And I've been watching
Speaker 2: a colleague of ours get sacked a year earlier and
Speaker 2: thinking she was very about to define by it. Oh no,
Speaker 2: that won't be me. But it was me. I mean,
Speaker 2: all my kids knew me, as was that person on
Speaker 2: the rate. I knew a mother obviously, but I'd always
Speaker 2: been that. I didn't realize how much that was part
Speaker 2: of me, yes, until it stopped. So, which is really
Speaker 2: interesting now because now I work a lot with helping
Speaker 2: people regain their identity, like often school moms. When you're
Speaker 2: a school mum. When your child glave school, you left
Speaker 2: with a bit of a lack of purpose. What next?
Speaker 2: So it's redefining who you are. So I think that's
Speaker 2: what I had to do. But like you, Pats, I said, no,
Speaker 2: that's not me. This isn't who I am. But it
Speaker 2: is a big part of your life. You give everything,
Speaker 2: so of course it's going to be part of your identity.
Speaker 2: It has to be.
Speaker 4: It must have felt quite foreign because I know, if
Speaker 4: we're on survey break and Audrey is still at school
Speaker 4: and I'm there for breakfast, which she's.
Speaker 3: Not used to me, I get in the way.
Speaker 2: I know you're a nuisance when you see ruined the
Speaker 2: root I do, and.
Speaker 4: She'll say, Mum, it's okay, you just do your own thing,
Speaker 4: and I feel very useless.
Speaker 2: I know. It's funny, isn't it. It's so funny how
Speaker 2: you just realize that they get on quite well without you,
Speaker 2: but your home and wanting to be part of it all.
Speaker 2: I know, like back to.
Speaker 3: Work, it's not where you fit, mum. You're not in
Speaker 3: that part of the jigsaw.
Speaker 4: But that's also isn't that a problem to where when
Speaker 4: you're a working mum, and especially when you're doing Brecky
Speaker 4: radio and you're leaving house at you know, god, god
Speaker 4: forsaken hours. You've set them up, You've got It's like
Speaker 4: a fine routine, isn't it.
Speaker 2: It's like a factory.
Speaker 4: Everyone's got their role, they know where they're meant to
Speaker 4: be at what time, and you almost do yourself out
Speaker 4: of a job.
Speaker 2: Well, I just have terrible guilt about not being around
Speaker 2: in the morning. God, yes, But then I realized, especially
Speaker 2: as the kid's got a bit older, that the afternoon
Speaker 2: was when they needed you because you had a bad
Speaker 2: day or whatever.
Speaker 3: That's where you always say that to me, that was
Speaker 3: the way.
Speaker 2: Maybe I was just justifying consult myself. Because I did,
Speaker 2: I felt terribly guilt. Yes, I never dropped them off.
Speaker 4: Ever, you miss the assembly, you miss the choir, you
Speaker 4: miss the violin assembly, the certificate giving. It's like I
Speaker 4: always have pangs of that even now. Bridge It's like,
Speaker 4: I look at Audrey, she's thirteen, nearly fourteen. We've only
Speaker 4: got maybe four or five years, and you know, they'll
Speaker 4: cryst will console me and say, yeah, but look what
Speaker 4: you've been able to do for her by exactly working.
Speaker 3: But it's not the same sometimes.
Speaker 2: Look, Look, I think working is a good thing for mums.
Speaker 3: I think it's good.
Speaker 2: And unfortunately the work we do, I did you do
Speaker 2: does take away that big chunk of the day. But however,
Speaker 2: as I always say, you're there for the rest of it,
Speaker 2: and you know, it's good that.
Speaker 3: Men a toast and sleep, sleep and grumpy.
Speaker 2: Even though you can't talk to them because you're exhausted.
Speaker 2: I mean, I gave my kids barbecue shapes for dinner.
Speaker 2: As I think I told you I was so tired
Speaker 2: some nights. Oh so yeah, yeah, do what you do.
Speaker 2: You do what you do, and everyone does what they do.
Speaker 2: I think every mother has guilt, every working mother has guilt,
Speaker 2: and even mothers are at home have guilt. Yes, from
Speaker 2: the minute you have a baby, you have guilt. Yep.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's hard that you get, Oh, you're not going
Speaker 4: back to work, aren't you. I got, oh you're not
Speaker 4: going back to work if you know it's taken you
Speaker 4: five years to have your baby, now you're going back
Speaker 4: to work. But it's almost Also, why should I stop
Speaker 4: being what I do just because I can do well,
Speaker 4: we're told we can do everything. But then you're right,
Speaker 4: stay at home mums get Oh you're staying at home.
Speaker 3: You can't win.
Speaker 2: You can't win, and I think the best way to
Speaker 2: do is except the best thing is just to accept
Speaker 2: you can't win and do the best at what you're doing.
Speaker 2: And you know, just accept that is the way it is.
Speaker 2: It's the only awake.
Speaker 4: Yeah, you were so helpful for me as I because
Speaker 4: I think I was back from Matt leave. I think,
Speaker 4: wasn't I when I went back to breakfast, So it
Speaker 4: certainly helped. You certainly helped get me through those mornings and.
Speaker 2: Those I just think it would help to have another
Speaker 2: mother in the team too, who understands what it's like
Speaker 2: to leave there. Well, mine worn't babies, but I left
Speaker 2: mine from when they were three months old. Yeah, I
Speaker 2: went back to work. That's hard. You know that I
Speaker 2: had ter good with that as well. Anyway, But once
Speaker 2: again you sort of wait up and you think, but
Speaker 2: least I can give you this, and that's.
Speaker 3: Right, that's right.
Speaker 4: Tell me, how is your work different? Because I guess
Speaker 4: you're so. You're such a great orator and talker and
Speaker 4: this it flows so beautifully and naturally. But this, I
Speaker 4: this must be different for you.
Speaker 2: The biggest thing I had to learn was one of
Speaker 2: the best skills you can have in counseling is listening.
Speaker 2: Now you and I know that if there's dead air
Speaker 2: for one minute, we start talking. Yes, And I've been trained,
Speaker 2: as we all have on radio, to just keep talking,
Speaker 2: keep talking, keep talking, because if you stop, it goes
Speaker 2: into panic mode and they put music.
Speaker 3: Emergency tape goes.
Speaker 2: So the biggest skill I've had to learn is sitting
Speaker 2: and listening and while they're talking, not being scared of
Speaker 2: dead air, like listen because then they'll keep going. So
Speaker 2: that's been the biggest thing. And I don't talk nearly
Speaker 2: as much as I used to imagine that, No I did.
Speaker 2: I literally sit there and I listen. I listened because also,
Speaker 2: you don't give advice, You just help them try and
Speaker 2: work it out for themselves. Yes, because if you give
Speaker 2: advice to somebody, if it's the wrong advice, that's a
Speaker 2: big thing. So I have really say to myself every
Speaker 2: day two years one mouth, yeah, which used.
Speaker 3: To be right all the way around.
Speaker 2: So I'm rewired, and that's probably bee the biggest challenge. Yeah.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm so proud of you. Do you know what
Speaker 4: you've done for women of our age? In our fifties.
Speaker 4: You're so right.
Speaker 3: It's like a.
Speaker 4: Collision sometimes of life. I think your fifties decade for
Speaker 4: me going through perimenopause and menopause. I think it's been
Speaker 4: an mind that I had cancer in my forties and
Speaker 4: fertility problems. I think it's been the most challenging, to
Speaker 4: be honest.
Speaker 2: And I don't think anyone prepares you for it. I mean,
Speaker 2: no one really prepares you for having a baby either,
Speaker 2: I suppose. But this menopause thing comes in so many
Speaker 2: different and everyone's just so different. Is terrifying, isn't it.
Speaker 2: Some of the things it does to you, which it
Speaker 2: was funny, not funny, actually was awful. I had a
Speaker 2: quite a young boy, you know, he has to be
Speaker 2: about nineteen or something. This was about a few months ago,
Speaker 2: and I suddenly started getting the sweats and I was
Speaker 2: literally dripping, dripping, and I'm like, it was so embarrassing
Speaker 2: because it's this young boy. I'm not gonna tell sorry,
Speaker 2: I've got menopause. Had it been like a someone else,
Speaker 2: I might have. But there was nothing I could do
Speaker 2: about it. And I've do you know, it's funny. I've
Speaker 2: been having watched the American election campaign. All I can
Speaker 2: do is look at Carmala Harris. I don't know where
Speaker 2: she sits in her journey. And I go back to
Speaker 2: Hillary Clinton, all these high profile women, How the hell
Speaker 2: do they manage menopause if they're getting bad effects from it?
Speaker 2: I think about that all the time.
Speaker 4: It's not fair, is it. At times? I can remember
Speaker 4: you sitting with a fan in the studio. You had
Speaker 4: that fan that plugged the USB thing.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I still have a fan. I've got this
Speaker 2: group of girlfriends and whenever we go to for dinner,
Speaker 2: we bring our hands and we all sit there and honestly,
Speaker 2: everyone else is going, what are they doing? But I don't.
Speaker 2: I'm a funny place, actually, because I was very late, right,
Speaker 2: funnily enough to actually stopping having all together. Yeah. So,
Speaker 2: and I have had not constant symptoms, but the ones
Speaker 2: like I've just described you have come from nowhere. Ye,
Speaker 2: and they and the nights where I can't sleep, Oh
Speaker 2: my god, it's the worst. Yeah, so bad. Yeah, But
Speaker 2: then it's all just seems to and you know, sometimes
Speaker 2: when you're moody, you can't work out why, whether is
Speaker 2: it that or is it something else? It's hard to know.
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 4: That's what I find most frustrating about it is And
Speaker 4: if you go to a specialist, they can't tell you
Speaker 4: at what point you are in your journey either.
Speaker 2: As I say, to look at your mother, don't they? Yeah,
Speaker 2: but my mother had his direct to met very early,
Speaker 2: so it's hard to look at her and say, what's
Speaker 2: your journey because apparently that is quite relevant.
Speaker 3: Well, my mum's eighty eighty one and still getting hot
Speaker 3: flushes the sweats.
Speaker 2: It's not fair some people have it. I actually had
Speaker 2: a client once again, a woman a bit younger than me,
Speaker 2: and it actually ruined her life. She got the worst
Speaker 2: symptoms I've ever seen started to affect a marriage.
Speaker 4: It's awful, it is what did you? What have you
Speaker 4: found helps has helped for you? I did try HRT
Speaker 4: for a while when that was going through that.
Speaker 2: That was good. But as I say, then I feel
Speaker 2: all fine again, and I think I've been one of
Speaker 2: the lucky ones, to be honest, but just having a
Speaker 2: hint of what it's like when it's bad, and for
Speaker 2: some people they get that all the time for years on.
Speaker 2: It's absolutely horrific and the brain fade.
Speaker 4: Yeah, Honestly, the amount of times I've been in the
Speaker 4: middle of saying something on air and then I'll just
Speaker 4: and I can't think, or I can't think of a word,
Speaker 4: and the boys just look at me, and I think, do.
Speaker 2: You remember when we were in when we used to
Speaker 2: work together and I had that fan going and the
Speaker 2: boys used to tease us, tease me unmercifully. And I
Speaker 2: think back now and I think, and I lots of
Speaker 2: men are listening to your podcast because men need to
Speaker 2: get on board with this totally, and young men, young men,
Speaker 2: and be so supportive because it used to be a
Speaker 2: joke or she's going through the church and it's actually
Speaker 2: so offensive because it is, you know, we go through
Speaker 2: so much. And I would love to think that men
Speaker 2: listen to rage against the menopause and think how can
Speaker 2: I best support my partner.
Speaker 3: I think the tide is turning, you know, Bridge.
Speaker 4: I've had so much beautiful feedback from series one last year,
Speaker 4: and surprisingly it took me off guard. A lot of
Speaker 4: men in their thirties who say thank you for educating me,
Speaker 4: because I had no idea what it was. And they'll say,
Speaker 4: you know, I know my mum was going through something,
Speaker 4: but I didn't fully understand it. So thank you for
Speaker 4: educating me, and thank you for equipping me for when
Speaker 4: my partner in ten or twenty.
Speaker 3: Years goes through.
Speaker 4: That's what I've aimed to do in this and to
Speaker 4: get the donversation, and you have done a great job
Speaker 4: of that.
Speaker 2: And I really love that fact that these younger men
Speaker 2: are very different to them grew up with.
Speaker 3: It can't be.
Speaker 2: It's amazing. They're much more in tune with being sympathetic, empathetic,
Speaker 2: understanding and not just going on my wife's gating to
Speaker 2: you know, all that rubbish we used to get. I
Speaker 2: think I've seen a massive change in. I think young
Speaker 2: men these days are amazing and it's a credit.
Speaker 4: To their mothers and their fathers for bringing up this
Speaker 4: new generation of men. You've got Charlie's what now, twenty
Speaker 4: twenty five.
Speaker 2: I know he's a grown up, and my daughter's twenty three, Alex,
Speaker 2: so I know they're I know they're big, mature people now. Believable,
Speaker 2: But I do I've really seen a change in. I
Speaker 2: think I was listening to one of your podcasts with
Speaker 2: one of an expert she was saying this, the metopause
Speaker 2: now is a bit like what mental health was a
Speaker 2: few years ago where Noah is not talking and no
Speaker 2: one was talking about it. Now it is becoming something.
Speaker 2: Thank goodness for you and other people who are tackling it. Yeah,
Speaker 2: because it's still a little bit of one of those
Speaker 2: forbiddens up.
Speaker 3: Their stigma, which is ridicul It's.
Speaker 2: Ridiculous because half the population go through no.
Speaker 3: I know, and one third of is it one third
Speaker 3: of women?
Speaker 4: At any time, I was doing a bit of research
Speaker 4: and you were on a wonderful podcast, The Power of Women.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, that was very digillic.
Speaker 4: Yeah, of course, and you said something that I think
Speaker 4: a lot of women can relate to.
Speaker 3: I'm going to play the audio because.
Speaker 2: We were talking to all our girlfriends. We're all fifty plus, say,
Speaker 2: every single one of them has had to go through
Speaker 2: some sort of change transition, whether it be like me
Speaker 2: losing a job, my friend losing her husband, empty nest,
Speaker 2: the kids have moved out, menopause, feeling invisible. And I
Speaker 2: think that age group of women go through such a
Speaker 2: lot and the attention is not on them. Nobody seems
Speaker 2: to realize what an invisible age this is.
Speaker 3: I love that an invisible age And do.
Speaker 2: You know it's so interesting. I've and it is exactly
Speaker 2: what I said. They're watching friends, every one of my friends.
Speaker 2: Something's going on. Whether it might even be elderly parents
Speaker 2: getting sick.
Speaker 3: That's a big thing.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and there is. I really feel like this group
Speaker 2: of women I put, let's say fifty plus need a
Speaker 2: lot more support than what they're getting. I get a
Speaker 2: lot of women that age coming into my rooms as well,
Speaker 2: and often it is literally I don't know who I am,
Speaker 2: I don't know what to do with myself, or I've
Speaker 2: forgotten how to talk to my husband and all of
Speaker 2: these things and no one you know, when you're young. Occasionally,
Speaker 2: not that we want men whistling at us, but we
Speaker 2: used to get noticed. That we're a group of women
Speaker 2: who no longer get noticed. And it's not a matter
Speaker 2: of vanity or anything else. It's just like, oh, what
Speaker 2: would she do? Just there? You're not what would that
Speaker 2: person who's had all this life experience. No, And it
Speaker 2: is a very difficult age, and I would love to
Speaker 2: see a lot more done. In fact, before I did
Speaker 2: the counselor, I wanted to start a network group for women,
Speaker 2: which then the counseling can have just never got around
Speaker 2: to it. My partner Andy Webster, who's she's a counselor
Speaker 2: as well. We've for a long time wanted to put
Speaker 2: together this workshop where we bring women together who going
Speaker 2: through whatever it is and give them support one strategies,
Speaker 2: lover it skills how to find themselves again and get
Speaker 2: through that. And look it is a projected on the list.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think that would be brilliant.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I do so you felt that. I mean, you're
Speaker 2: a lot younger than maybe it with your friends.
Speaker 3: Not that much younger. Yeah, I have and girlfriends as well.
Speaker 3: You know.
Speaker 4: I'll tell you a funny story. I was in a
Speaker 4: major retailer the other day in the shoe department, go figure,
Speaker 4: yes and yes, Imelda standing there, and I was right
Speaker 4: in the staffer's face, like I was right there, right there.
Speaker 4: There were two younger girls either side of me who
Speaker 4: came after, and she went to them, but she didn't
Speaker 4: even It was like truly didn't exist. It really was
Speaker 4: like I was invisible. And one of them fortunately said
Speaker 4: I'm sorry this lady was here first, and I thought,
Speaker 4: I'm not that hard to like, I'm here, I am here, Like.
Speaker 2: It is an invisible age.
Speaker 3: Really, invisible.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it really is. It's almost like you just discarded,
Speaker 2: like you know, we are an aging society, but it's
Speaker 2: a shame. In other countries, aging is considered the older
Speaker 2: you get, the more valuable you get, and I feel
Speaker 2: like in this country that is not the case at all. Yeah,
Speaker 2: but you know, I think, I think I'm turning sixty
Speaker 2: this year and I'm really excited about I've got no
Speaker 2: problem with getting older. I love the idea of being
Speaker 2: sixtycause I love the world life, all of that experience.
Speaker 2: But you can't buy no, But I am feeling all
Speaker 2: those things that you're just talking about, the invisibility and
Speaker 2: everything else, and it is something that we have to
Speaker 2: work on together as a group of women and give
Speaker 2: us the skills to get through that in the strategies,
Speaker 2: because it is. It's a terrible, terrible feeling. And I
Speaker 2: don't think men get that, No they don't. They don't know.
Speaker 3: Well, they're seen as a silver fox and a stallion.
Speaker 2: Look at those. Yeah, all those lives really suiting. We
Speaker 2: get a line and we suddenly you know, it really is. Look,
Speaker 2: it's getting better slowly. But I was never aware of
Speaker 2: all the things that women of this age go through.
Speaker 2: I think you I don't know whether you've heard that
Speaker 2: A lot of the homeless population and women.
Speaker 4: Over sixty, which is just marriage breakups and yet or
Speaker 4: no super or not all of that being, you know,
Speaker 4: not being out of work because I will bring.
Speaker 2: Up the children.
Speaker 3: It is disgusting because they give all of themselves.
Speaker 4: And that that's another point I want to make, and
Speaker 4: that you have made previously, is that don't in effect,
Speaker 4: don't rest on your laurels, like okay, I've had a
Speaker 4: thirty six year career in radio, but don't take for
Speaker 4: granted whatever industry you're in that well it just sounds
Speaker 4: dye that it won't be discarded.
Speaker 3: Have a backup.
Speaker 2: Well, okay, I talked a lot about that in that
Speaker 2: podcast that would diguill It. I never had a backup,
Speaker 2: and I look back now and think, you idiot, But
Speaker 2: I actually just just kept going and going and going,
Speaker 2: and I never ever crossed my mind that was stupid.
Speaker 2: So the worst thing about which you're right, That's what
Speaker 2: I learned, is always have a plan, be and don't
Speaker 2: think you're too old to not knowskill reskill. And I
Speaker 2: think when I went to Union, I was the oldest
Speaker 2: by a mile, but all the young kids were just
Speaker 2: lovely to me. They couldn't have been nicer. They were
Speaker 2: better at their essays, but they all said in the
Speaker 2: practical stuff, we can't get to where you are because
Speaker 2: you're older. You've just got an experience which we can't see.
Speaker 4: So I mean, you're so good at talking to people
Speaker 4: life experience.
Speaker 2: Well, we've got so much to offer, and we can't
Speaker 2: let menopause or anything else, or invisibility or anything else
Speaker 2: put us off and not feeling empowered that. You know,
Speaker 2: I'm excited about the next twenty years, assuming I really
Speaker 2: am excited about it, but I am passionate about I
Speaker 2: would really love to help, really would love to get
Speaker 2: this workshop together, which you need to do it. It's
Speaker 2: on my list, Pats.
Speaker 4: No, But I mean good things worth doing take time.
Speaker 4: It's like this podcast to you know this seriously, Bridge
Speaker 4: was like three four years in the making.
Speaker 2: And what made you so passionate because you were going through.
Speaker 3: Because I was frustrated.
Speaker 4: So when I was going through it, I just thought,
Speaker 4: why aren't we talking about this?
Speaker 3: Like why is it such a dirty word?
Speaker 4: Like there was so much emphasis on conception and pregnancy
Speaker 4: and birth, but why not again, It's that whole discarded
Speaker 4: generation where I thought, well, hang on, no, and you
Speaker 4: work decades and decades and decades to perfect your craft
Speaker 4: and then this hits.
Speaker 3: And you know, for me it was hang on.
Speaker 4: So I had infertility for five years and lots of
Speaker 4: pregnancy loss. Then I got cancer and then I hit
Speaker 4: It's like, now.
Speaker 3: You want me to go through.
Speaker 2: This, Yes, I know, and we'll be a mum. And
Speaker 2: it has there has to be a situation of empathy.
Speaker 2: It's like, it really annoys me that women don't get
Speaker 2: sanitary products. We're talking about half she's still.
Speaker 3: On probably I can't remember.
Speaker 2: All I know is that you know, when half the
Speaker 2: population is going through something, surely and the empathy from
Speaker 2: men is one of the most important things. And I
Speaker 2: do think hopefully that is thanks to you and other people,
Speaker 2: is coming to light. But you know the other thing
Speaker 2: where women have babies, and that's not easy. I mean,
Speaker 2: I'm glad we do. I'm glad we get to do
Speaker 2: that to be that person, but that is tough when
Speaker 2: you think what you go through with that, and then
Speaker 2: you come out the other end and off you go
Speaker 2: again into this other abyss of.
Speaker 3: Yeah, go and be professional again now.
Speaker 4: Plus you just feel like you're carrying so many bags
Speaker 4: and everything.
Speaker 2: I know, and I think I just think it's really
Speaker 2: important to have it out in the open, and it
Speaker 2: would be good, and it would have been nice if
Speaker 2: I could have when I was in the room sweating
Speaker 2: with that young boy embarrassed, well, I think I just
Speaker 2: think it caught me by surprise and I was horrified,
Speaker 2: and I just if it had been you sitting opposite me,
Speaker 2: that would have been easy. But I think in retrospect,
Speaker 2: I should have just said, also, you don't reveal too
Speaker 2: much about which, of course it might be a bit
Speaker 2: personal too, but I would definitely. I mean, the girls
Speaker 2: and I talk about it all the time. We spend
Speaker 2: our life talking about it with our fans, and that's
Speaker 2: great and everything else. And look, some of my friends
Speaker 2: have had it absolutely terribly, like they have really their
Speaker 2: whole lives have been affected by it. I changed their life,
Speaker 2: Britchie about to stop worker one has one's been on
Speaker 2: hrt off, hrt, tried this, tried that, just ongoing and
Speaker 2: very down in the dumps and you know, not a
Speaker 2: depressive personality at all. So that's been really really tricky.
Speaker 4: How many of your clients that you see through counseling
Speaker 4: do you think perhaps their mental state can be metopause
Speaker 4: part of it.
Speaker 2: A few, like a lot of women who come in
Speaker 2: who are in that range. I often say, I'm not
Speaker 2: sure I'm feeling this way if it's that or But
Speaker 2: usually it always plays a part, and some, as I've said,
Speaker 2: really drastically bad I was. I don't know. I don't
Speaker 2: know the answers to it because I haven't gone into
Speaker 2: it far enough because I haven't needed to. But I
Speaker 2: do think always heading down the Eastern track's a good
Speaker 2: idea to just seeing if there's some some sort of
Speaker 2: Chinese medicine that can help you. Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 3: If it means standing on your head up against a wall.
Speaker 2: If it helps, Yeah, It's like I do try to
Speaker 2: get pregnant to do the bicycle legs.
Speaker 4: Yes, you would have done it, pillow up under the
Speaker 4: bum you every single day. Well, I was taking Chinese herbs,
Speaker 4: so we were flying up to Sydney once a month.
Speaker 4: We had this German Chinese doctor, doctor Snell.
Speaker 3: He was brilliant.
Speaker 4: He had this tiny little practice in Chatswood and we
Speaker 4: go up once a month and he do dry needling.
Speaker 4: And I think it was at Moxie. Have you ever
Speaker 4: seen mine?
Speaker 2: I had moxy. I had Moxy, the burning box I
Speaker 2: called it. Yeah, I had that when I was trying
Speaker 2: to get pregnant.
Speaker 3: Yes, it's brilliant.
Speaker 4: And you know what so I had about because I've
Speaker 4: got indo and polycystic. So he cleared. I mean you've
Speaker 4: always got that, you can't get rid of it. But
Speaker 4: cleared all the gun out of my system. And then
Speaker 4: you pregnant and got pregnant with ordering and we've done
Speaker 4: IVF before that that didn't work.
Speaker 3: It's look, it's whatever.
Speaker 2: Works, whatever works for you, and I don't care how crazy. Yeah,
Speaker 2: it's like I remember when Jim Stein's had cancer and
Speaker 2: he's doing everything he could and he ended up drinking?
Speaker 2: Is you? And I think at once that's and I'm like,
Speaker 2: I was thinking, go for it, like whatever you can
Speaker 2: do to help yourself. But I think the best thing
Speaker 2: is talking about it, getting your partners talking about it.
Speaker 2: Without that And I really think back to those days
Speaker 2: with that fan and the mockery like it was constant,
Speaker 2: wasn't it, And look good hearted in every way, But
Speaker 2: I think back on now. I think I shouldn't have
Speaker 2: had to probably had to know that.
Speaker 4: No, No, I think yeah, there's lessons to be learned.
Speaker 2: I think, yeah, yeah, and you're teaching them. Patsy. I'm
Speaker 2: very proud of you.
Speaker 3: I'm proud of you.
Speaker 2: Well, I'm prouder proud.
Speaker 4: Like So if women are grappling and they're in Melbourne
Speaker 4: because you're where is your.
Speaker 2: Oh that's very nice. If you it's Bridget Duco Counseling.
Speaker 2: I've got rooms in South Yarra, so if you can
Speaker 2: just yeah, google Bridget do Co Counseling.
Speaker 3: I've got rooms in South Yarra. No I haven't.
Speaker 2: You've got rooms in Richmond, and you've got a website.
Speaker 2: I've got a website. So it's b D yeh one
Speaker 2: of those things. What's underscore hyphen hyphen bd bd?
Speaker 4: Oh god, this is the rain fog. Just just blame
Speaker 4: the brain fog. We can put a link, we can
Speaker 4: put a link.
Speaker 2: We can absolutely, I see that's menopause. Anyway, it's b
Speaker 2: D Counseling dot com dot means because it's so embarrassing.
Speaker 2: Thanks for the plug, which I've just mucked up.
Speaker 3: No you haven't.
Speaker 4: We'll put a link up because seriously, if people are grappling,
Speaker 4: it helps to talk to someone that's not necessarily your
Speaker 4: partner or a girlfriend.
Speaker 3: You just need to find the right mix, don't you.
Speaker 2: And I just think, and there are strategies, which you know.
Speaker 2: I love helping people try and not feel the pain
Speaker 2: their feeling. But I put some things into place. There
Speaker 2: are a lot of things you can do. And I
Speaker 2: think often with women our age, you've spent so much
Speaker 2: time throwing everything in to the kids, You've actually forgotten
Speaker 2: how to soothe yourself.
Speaker 3: It's shop syndrome. I call it.
Speaker 2: Yep.
Speaker 4: You just you always put yourself last. And it's not
Speaker 4: a conscious decision you make. I just think, as a mum,
Speaker 4: you do that.
Speaker 2: You do that, and then suddenly it's like, oh, I've
Speaker 2: forgotten how to look after myself. I don't know how
Speaker 2: to start. So yeah, I mean that's where And I
Speaker 2: am passionate aboutetting these workshops, which I will must one
Speaker 2: of these days.
Speaker 3: I'd love to see you do that. Yeah, you should
Speaker 3: do this podcast series.
Speaker 2: Now I'm on yours. I don't want to do mine.
Speaker 3: I'm quite happy a big guests, Bridgie, thank you so much.
Speaker 2: You just adorable.
Speaker 3: I love you a bit well, I.
Speaker 2: Love you too, and I'm good on you. I think
Speaker 2: this is a really amazing podcast. I've listened to every episode,
Speaker 2: and I also think good on you because I know
Speaker 2: you've put the whole thing together yourself and it's amazing.
Speaker 1: So good on, congratulations, Thank you. Bridge to Chloe. You know,
Speaker 1: some people just come into our lives reason. She's certainly
Speaker 1: one of those blessings in my life. Join me in
Speaker 1: episode five, as I hit the halfway mark of series
Speaker 1: two of Rage Against the Menopause, I talk about a
Speaker 1: breakthrough in treatment.
Speaker 2: Ossie.
Speaker 1: Women suffering from debilitating symptoms finally have access to the
Speaker 1: first new kind of hormone therapy to be subsidized by
Speaker 1: the federal government in more than two decades. We explore
Speaker 1: those options with Professor doctor Sonya Davison, endochronology lead at
Speaker 1: the Gene Hales Clinic. I'm Petrina Jones, and thanks for
Speaker 1: listening Rage Against the Menopause.