Speaker 1: Mitch, cue the ominous music.
Speaker 2: Oh, I've got it ready, always prepared.
Speaker 3: There is a pandemic that is sweeping Melbourne right now,
Speaker 3: and it is something that mothers should be very very
Speaker 3: friend of fathers as well, but I'm sure more mums
Speaker 3: will care.
Speaker 1: Right now, I'm like, oh, this sounds so bad.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, sixty percent of children will be affected by this, Jez,
Speaker 3: and they are super in their powers, are.
Speaker 1: Super in their powers. Yeah, I'm actually trying to work
Speaker 1: it out. I don't even want the answer. I want
Speaker 1: to work it out.
Speaker 3: These blood sucking creepy Crawley, I've got vampires are coming
Speaker 3: for your children in a school, in a daycare right now.
Speaker 2: It's getting scary alright.
Speaker 1: What's the guys.
Speaker 3: Sixty percent of children in Melbourne are going to have nits?
Speaker 1: Oh no, because there is.
Speaker 3: A super There is a breed of super knits that
Speaker 3: are taking over Australia and they are so hard to
Speaker 3: get rid of.
Speaker 1: They do not respond to normal knit treatment. There are
Speaker 1: super nits. Remember what this was like when we were kids.
Speaker 3: I have so many memories of sitting in my mom's
Speaker 3: kitchen on the floor and she would have one of
Speaker 3: those stupid like those combs, those little metal combs.
Speaker 1: It's a nick comb. A nick comb.
Speaker 2: You couldn't see through the crack. The little prongs were
Speaker 2: so close together.
Speaker 3: But it was an electric one, so it would buzz
Speaker 3: them as it pulled them out. You'd feel this little Oh.
Speaker 4: I didn't have that one. My name was mainstream, like
Speaker 4: no buzzing. But can I tell you, I am traumatized
Speaker 4: from the moment I had nits.
Speaker 1: I the first one I got them.
Speaker 4: I was probably in year one, and I'll never forget that.
Speaker 4: I was going for my first proper haircut at a
Speaker 4: hairdressers that afternoon, and I remember I told everyone at
Speaker 4: school like, I'm getting.
Speaker 1: My hair done, blah blah blah blah.
Speaker 4: I get to the hair dressers and I sit in
Speaker 4: the chair and she puts the cap on me, and
Speaker 4: then she goes to touch my hair and I see
Speaker 4: her like recoil in the mirror.
Speaker 1: She was like, oh my god.
Speaker 4: She put her hands up and she goes, I can't
Speaker 4: touch your daughter to my mom and my mom was
Speaker 4: like what And she goes, She's got nitch.
Speaker 1: She's infected. And I've been so embarrassed in that moments.
Speaker 4: They took the cape off, and I had to leave,
Speaker 4: and then I had to go home get my knit treatment,
Speaker 4: and then everyone at school the other the next day
Speaker 4: was like, why didn't you get your hair done?
Speaker 1: That's humili and I had to say because I hadn't.
Speaker 5: I can still smell it. The smell of eucalyptus to
Speaker 5: this day gives me PTSD.
Speaker 1: Is that what you is that what you remember like
Speaker 1: from the nit tree?
Speaker 3: I don't remember the smell of the tree that it
Speaker 3: was t triol.
Speaker 2: Wasn't it cove your hair? Your mummud combed?
Speaker 5: And then my mum would get the glad out the
Speaker 5: super mega you know, like the big role of wrap
Speaker 5: you and I couldn't think of the word, and she'd
Speaker 5: wrap my head around.
Speaker 2: I'd sit there watching Nickelodeon while.
Speaker 1: Didn't even for that.
Speaker 3: But I think there's a lot of misconceptions though, right
Speaker 3: because a lot of kids think that you get nitscush're
Speaker 3: dirty like and that's why other kids get it. But
Speaker 3: really they're just attracted to kids that have clean hair,
Speaker 3: but really really thick hair. You miss this while you're
Speaker 3: away in the giant, while you're away in the jungle.
Speaker 3: I brought a public service announcement to all of the
Speaker 3: parents of Australia. I help them get out of you know, noses,
Speaker 3: little noses that could maybe get like an object trapped
Speaker 3: up them. I also taught the parents of Australia how
Speaker 3: to cycle wind out of their children.
Speaker 1: I think mich which was like such a willing participant
Speaker 1: in this.
Speaker 2: It wasn't you have been no choice.
Speaker 1: It's such an incredible like the child dummy.
Speaker 2: I would say, I did not offer my body up
Speaker 2: for science.
Speaker 3: And I think that now we owe another public service
Speaker 3: announcement and we do. We owe this to the Australian public,
Speaker 3: and that is Mitch Tomorrow. I'm going to show everyone
Speaker 3: on the show how to get nits out of their hair,
Speaker 3: and that's by using you.
Speaker 4: Should we make this actually accurate, scientifically accurate and put
Speaker 4: knits in his hair first?
Speaker 1: We can go to that length. How do you feel
Speaker 1: about that?
Speaker 3: But it doesn't matter, Actually, it doesn't matter how Mitch
Speaker 3: feels because it's happening on tomorrow show.
Speaker 2: You guys know this is a job, right, like there's
Speaker 2: a hr.
Speaker 1: You paid well for this. You can't complain.
Speaker 2: I'm not getting knits, I'm not getting infested.
Speaker 1: With We're not going to actually infest you. We're just
Speaker 1: going to pretend. We'll put pretend it's in it. Anyway,
Speaker 1: that's coming up on tomorrow show.
Speaker 2: Is that what we're doing on Wednesday? You guys said,
Speaker 2: we'll tell you after.
Speaker 4: The show, Mitch, glad rap Mitch.
Speaker 1: We'll come up with a better name for a person.
Speaker 1: Isn't it just Mittmit? Mitch?
Speaker 4: Mitt sounded better in my head.
Speaker 5: I'm not we need to talk after because I'm not.
Speaker 5: I don't know if I'm keen on this.
Speaker 4: All right, well let's go to Will and Woody. You
Speaker 4: don't have a choice, Mitch show. We're going to nit
Speaker 4: you delight your.
Speaker 2: Cant wait, that sound like a golden retriever.
Speaker 1: Oh, there's many techniques.
Speaker 3: We want to make sure people are using the most
Speaker 3: effective one against these super lice. Anyway, coming up next,
Speaker 3: what are the boys go on the show?
Speaker 5: Will and Woody are back on the air. They'll be
Speaker 5: on next and we are done. We'll see you all tomorrow.
Speaker 5: You've got to be able to smell me through the
Speaker 5: radio tomorrow, everyone, So apologies in advance.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and if you miss the show and you want
Speaker 3: to listen to it all on the pick Up you
Speaker 3: can go to wherever you listen to your podcast.
Speaker 1: It's the pick up Radio show.
Speaker 3: You can get it all there, all right, Smell your
Speaker 3: later guys away from the nets.
Speaker 2: Goodbye,