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Speaker 1: It's the Happy Families podcast. It's the podcast for the

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Speaker 1: time poor parent who just once answers, now, why.

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Speaker 2: Can't we have uplifting art? Why do we have to

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Speaker 2: have depraved, destruction oriented art that gets into the heads

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Speaker 2: of our kids so that when they watch a trailer

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Speaker 2: for something, they can't go to sleep.

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Speaker 1: And now here's the stars of our show, My mom

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Speaker 1: and dad.

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Speaker 2: Monday morning, the eleventh of October, we have got lockdowns

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Speaker 2: being what's the word removed for New South Wales.

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Speaker 3: Oh, they must be breathing a sigh of.

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Speaker 2: Relief, one of the longest lockdowns in the world. And wow,

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Speaker 2: how good must that feel? So that's some good news.

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Speaker 2: Tragedy occurred over the weekend in our home. I'm saying

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Speaker 2: tragedy with a smile, that it would so much sorrow

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Speaker 2: for you. Why don't you share the story? Kylie? Oh,

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Speaker 2: by the way, I'm justin here with Kylie, founder of

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Speaker 2: Happy Families dot com. Doda you what happened? What was

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Speaker 2: so tragic?

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Speaker 4: Let's just say I tried a new hairdresser. I don't

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Speaker 4: think I have ever cried so much over a haircut

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Speaker 4: in my life.

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Speaker 2: So here's the problem. Right, So you've gone to get

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Speaker 2: this haircut on Friday, try the new hairdresser. It hasn't

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Speaker 2: worked very well, and it was obvious that it hadn't

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Speaker 2: worked very well. As soon as you walked in the door.

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Speaker 2: I was doing my best to just be like, I

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Speaker 2: know you're having a hard time. Don't worry about your hair.

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Speaker 2: It'll grow on you.

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Speaker 3: Ha ha.

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Speaker 2: And we were supposed to go out because we both

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Speaker 2: have celebrated birthdays over the last week. Friday night, We're

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Speaker 2: going to go out, have the kids all organized. It

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Speaker 2: was just going to be you and me, romantic dinner,

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Speaker 2: enjoying one another's company, celebrating all of our years. And

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Speaker 2: you made me cancel dinner, and you got into bed

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Speaker 2: in your pajamas and you cried all night.

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Speaker 3: I did.

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Speaker 2: That gives you an idea. By the way of the haircut.

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Speaker 2: When Kylie walked in the door, I was like, I

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Speaker 2: didn't say it out loud, but I thought to myself

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Speaker 2: that maybe the worst haircut you've had in the entire

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Speaker 2: time that I've ever known you.

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Speaker 3: I just I could not do life. I couldn't even record.

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Speaker 4: We're recording this lad then we've ever had to record

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Speaker 4: an episode because I just I was so distraught. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: let's just say it still is the way it was.

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Speaker 2: No, no, no, no. You know, when you wake up

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Speaker 2: the next day after a bad haircut, you wash your hair,

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Speaker 2: you give it a bit of a in your own way,

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Speaker 2: and it's gone from being a one out of ten

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Speaker 2: to being about a six out of ten.

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Speaker 3: It's still awful.

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Speaker 2: So we're going to find it still awful to find

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Speaker 2: another new hairdresser this week.

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Speaker 3: I can't leave the house. I'm so glad this isn't videoed.

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Speaker 2: Oh dear me, it's something else that I.

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Speaker 4: Can't Honestly, I can't believe it, just the impact that

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Speaker 4: a bad haircut can have on the way you feel.

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Speaker 4: I've heard people do it, and I couldn't Honestly, I

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Speaker 4: couldn't understand why it was such a big deal. But

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Speaker 4: I literally couldn't stop crying.

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Speaker 2: Because I just need to emphasize, You're not You're not

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Speaker 2: that shallow, like, you're not superficially oriented. You're pretty relaxed

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Speaker 2: about I.

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Speaker 4: Have a five minute routine in the bathroom, like I

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Speaker 4: just I don't spend time on that stuff.

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Speaker 3: It's You're not me.

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Speaker 2: You're not a hair and makeup kind of person.

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Speaker 4: I just, you know, throw my fingers through my hair,

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Speaker 4: maybe put a bit of product and I'm done.

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Speaker 2: But on Saturday morning you woke up and you cried

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Speaker 2: some more.

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Speaker 3: I did a lot.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I mean it was just so that was

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Speaker 2: our weekend. Happy for you New South Wales. Still in

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Speaker 2: morning here in Queensland or Kylie's hair. We did have

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Speaker 2: one bright moment though, on Sunday morning, as we were

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Speaker 2: having breakfast, we looked out onto the back deck and

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Speaker 2: noticed that Emily, our seven year old, was wiping the

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Speaker 2: dog's bum with some toilet. Parenting is just awesome, isn't it.

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Speaker 3: I was so proud of her once she done it,

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Speaker 3: she went.

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Speaker 2: So proud of it.

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Speaker 3: What is that?

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Speaker 2: Gosh? Anyway, we need to talk about something very serious.

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Speaker 3: So was that not serious enough?

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Speaker 2: I mean, seriously, your haircut was serious. We have a

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Speaker 2: lot of correspondence over the last week or so that

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Speaker 2: sounded just like this. Hi, justin. I was hoping you

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Speaker 2: could please help families like ours who have kids bombarded

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Speaker 2: by the TV show Squid Game. It's everywhere. I've told

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Speaker 2: my seventeen year old son, I don't recommend he watches

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Speaker 2: it until he's eighteen idearly twenty and my daughter is

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Speaker 2: ten and she's coming across it online, from seemingly innocent

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Speaker 2: clips on YouTube to kids copying the various games on

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Speaker 2: the show. Our daughter and I watched the trailer and

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Speaker 2: got only a few seconds in and we pulled the pin.

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Speaker 2: So the daughter's ten here and she couldn't sleep in

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Speaker 2: her own bed. Her peers are allowed to watch it.

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Speaker 2: It's sickening. I'd love to have your opinion so that

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Speaker 2: I could share it around, and I think you'll find

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Speaker 2: it maybe a pretty darn hot topic. So full disclosure,

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Speaker 2: You and I, Kylie, we are not the kind of

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Speaker 2: people who would watch squid Game normally, but we and

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Speaker 2: we haven't technically watched it. We've given it a look

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Speaker 2: is how I would describe what we've done with squid Game.

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Speaker 2: But we've also done a lot of reading about it,

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Speaker 2: and that, combined with the look, we need to talk

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Speaker 2: about squid Game and kids.

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Speaker 4: The first thing that jumped out at me is that

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Speaker 4: the rating this is an fifteen plus.

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Speaker 2: I think that it should be R rated, honestly. I

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Speaker 2: mean so, we were a few minutes into episode one,

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Speaker 2: and I'm so sorry for anyone who's Squeamish a few

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Speaker 2: maybe maybe eight minutes into episode one, and there's a

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Speaker 2: torture scene with a guy. I'm so sorry I'm even

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Speaker 2: saying this, with a guy who's got a knife up

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Speaker 2: someone's nose and he's torturing him. And it's just it's

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Speaker 2: it's depraved. It is utterly depraved. And as I've read

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Speaker 2: more and as we've skimmed through and looked at it

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Speaker 2: a little bit more, this is not a show for children,

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Speaker 2: full stop, end of story. And I really, truly I

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Speaker 2: can't say this clearly enough. I absolutely, unquestionably would have

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Speaker 2: to say that a parent who is letting their kids

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Speaker 2: watch squid Game is not doing their job as a parent.

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Speaker 4: This is an age problem. Ratings have always I mean,

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Speaker 4: I remember as a kid, my friends were able to

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Speaker 4: watch things that my parents would never have let me watch.

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Speaker 3: And yet as.

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Speaker 4: We've become parents and we've spent time with our kids,

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Speaker 4: we've actually let the rating be a guide. But it

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Speaker 4: still doesn't mean that we let our children watch it

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Speaker 4: just because it's a PG. And I think that as

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Speaker 4: parents we really need to take some responsibility.

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Speaker 3: What are we letting our kids watch?

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Speaker 4: You know this, parents acknowledged that her kids are being

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Speaker 4: bombarded by it from every side, and I think as

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Speaker 4: parents we need to rally together, like it's so important

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Speaker 4: for our kids to be able to be kids.

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Speaker 3: Why are we letting them.

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Speaker 4: Watch these shows that just go against, like I said,

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Speaker 4: the best of human nature.

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Speaker 2: They're de praved. There's nothing uplifting, there's nothing redeeming, there's

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Speaker 2: nothing positive. It's punching down and it's just it's gross.

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Speaker 2: For those of you who don't know what's good. Game is,

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Speaker 2: by the way, I don't know where you've been hiding.

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Speaker 2: It's the number one show on Netflix globally and here

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Speaker 2: in Australia as well. You can either watch it with

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Speaker 2: subtitles or you can have it dubbed. We were watching

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Speaker 2: some of the dubbed stuff and which makes it even

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Speaker 2: worse to watch. I mean, it's just horrendous to watch

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Speaker 2: it with the dubbing. And it's kind of like the

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Speaker 2: Hunger Games, but on steroids. It's really really repulsive. Four

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Speaker 2: hundred and fifty five people who have got no money

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Speaker 2: and are desperate for money go into a game literally

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Speaker 2: it's called squid game, and they play kids' games. But

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Speaker 2: there's a murderous, deathly twist on every single one, and

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Speaker 2: if you don't win the game, you're basically you die,

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Speaker 2: and they die in horrible, horrible ways. I don't understand

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Speaker 2: the hype. I don't understand why people are into this.

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Speaker 2: But here's the thing. Our kids are watching it, everyone's

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Speaker 2: talking about it. We've got we've got Halloween coming up

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Speaker 2: in a couple of weeks time, and everyone's trying to

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Speaker 2: get their Squid Game costumes going for that. I mean,

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Speaker 2: there's the whole conversation about Halloween and Australia anyway, but

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Speaker 2: that's happening, and we've got parents who are saying, I've

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Speaker 2: got a ten year old, I've got a nine year old,

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Speaker 2: I've got an eleven year old. We've banned it, but

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Speaker 2: our kids' friends are sending them clips. They're playing it

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Speaker 2: on Roadblocks. There's like there's I think that I read

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Speaker 2: there's three hundred different Roadblocks games on the Squid Game theme. Like,

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Speaker 2: this thing is proliferating and going everywhere. If you're in

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Speaker 2: that situation, you want to know what to do, how

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Speaker 2: to protect your kids from it, what to do about it.

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Speaker 2: We're going to talk about that right after the break

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Speaker 2: it's the Happy Families Podcast.

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Speaker 4: For a happier family, Try a Happy Families membership, because

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Speaker 4: a happy family doesn't just happen.

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Speaker 2: Details at happy families dot com dot au.

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Speaker 4: It's the Happy Families Podcast, the podcast for the time

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Speaker 4: poor parent who just wants answers now and today we

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Speaker 4: are tackling this number one Netflix show.

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Speaker 2: This number one problem.

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Speaker 3: Well, that's what I wanted to say.

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Speaker 2: I don't want to I don't want to sound like

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Speaker 2: a wowser. I don't want to sound like one of

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Speaker 2: those people. And all the kids kind of do this stuff.

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Speaker 2: But this, this is gross, full stop, end of story,

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Speaker 2: and it just I don't see how it belongs in

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Speaker 2: a civilized society. I know some people canna say, oh,

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Speaker 2: it's art. Why can't we have uplifting art? Why do

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Speaker 2: we have to have depraved, destruction oriented art that gets

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Speaker 2: into the heads of our kids so that when they

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Speaker 2: watch a trailer for something, they can't go to sleep

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Speaker 2: at night.

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Speaker 4: Before the break, we tapped into the fact that this

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Speaker 4: is an age old story. Parents have been dealing with

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Speaker 4: these challenges and with ratings and all kinds of things

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Speaker 4: and knowing how to protect their children, especially when in

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Speaker 4: their own, homeless or not able to shelter them for

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Speaker 4: it in the playground or on their screen. So what

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Speaker 4: can parents do if they're in that position?

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Speaker 2: It's really really hard, right, So you can have all

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Speaker 2: the conversations you like at home, but once the kids

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Speaker 2: get to school, if they're interested, and if their friends

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Speaker 2: are interested, and if they're showing their friends stuff on

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Speaker 2: their devices before school, after school, during school. Obviously for

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Speaker 2: those who are in lockdown, I'm looking at you Melbourne,

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Speaker 2: Victoria and the Act, and there's still most New Southwest

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Speaker 2: kids are still at home anyway, it's probably not going

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Speaker 2: to be quite as big an issue. But everywhere else

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Speaker 2: the kids are hanging out with each other, they're being

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Speaker 2: exposed to it, visiting one another in their homes. This

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Speaker 2: stuff is going to be everywhere. As a parent, all

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Speaker 2: you can really do is say, hey, what have you heard?

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Speaker 2: What do you know? What are your friends talking about?

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Speaker 2: So that's where you do the explore stuff, and then

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Speaker 2: you explain, and that's where you get the opportunity to

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Speaker 2: explain your values. This stuff's gross, or you might even

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Speaker 2: ask how do you feel about it? Before you talk

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Speaker 2: about what you think about it. But you want the

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Speaker 2: kids to be sharing how they feel about it, and

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Speaker 2: then it's really about impairing them. What do you think

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Speaker 2: is the best way to respond if someone wants to

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Speaker 2: show you, I would be talking to the kids about saying,

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Speaker 2: we can't stop you from looking at it, but we

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Speaker 2: want to caution you against it. And here's what we

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Speaker 2: want you to pay attention to. If you do see it,

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Speaker 2: pay attention to how it makes you feel inside.

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Speaker 3: That was the exact thing I was thinking.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, it's so easy for us to just get dragged along,

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Speaker 4: But if we can teach our kids to have that

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Speaker 4: internal dialogue and that internal awareness of what they're actually

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Speaker 4: feeling in any given moment, that becomes their internal compass, right.

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Speaker 2: Right, And that's what we need to help them to grow.

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Speaker 2: That's why the explorer explained in Power three Easier Effective

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Speaker 2: Discipline strategy is so useful. You want them to listen

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Speaker 2: to their inner voice. When I teach my sessions to

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Speaker 2: parents and teachers about how to talk about consent with

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Speaker 2: their kids, this is actually an issue of consent in

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Speaker 2: because the program will assault your kids. It's precisely what

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Speaker 2: it will do. It's got horrendous violence in it, and

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Speaker 2: from what I've read in the reviews, Well, we haven't

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Speaker 2: seen it this part of it ourselves. It's also quite

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Speaker 2: sexually explicit from what the reviews are saying, so it

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Speaker 2: will assault your children, especially your young children. In fact,

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Speaker 2: with the little bit that we saw, I felt assaulted.

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Speaker 2: It's just not and I would actually say, our kids

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Speaker 2: haven't brought it up, but we're going to have a

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Speaker 2: conversation with them about it once we finished talking about

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Speaker 2: it on the podcast. I will actually say to our kids,

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Speaker 2: this is not a program that I would ever look at.

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Speaker 2: This is not something that I want in my life.

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Speaker 2: This is not going to edify me. It's not going

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Speaker 2: to teach me anything. It's not going to help me

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Speaker 2: to be a better person, and it's not going to

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Speaker 2: help me to make a positive of difference in the world. Therefore,

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Speaker 2: I don't want it in my life. It's not useful

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Speaker 2: in any possible way, and it's not even entertaining. It

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Speaker 2: just makes me feel gross. But also acknowledge with your kids,

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Speaker 2: you're still probably going to feel a bit curious about it.

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Speaker 2: You're still going to want to check it out because

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Speaker 2: this stuff is intriguing.

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Speaker 4: Well, we talk a lot in our home about the

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Speaker 4: fact that force creates resistance. If you just put a blanket,

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Speaker 4: your band ban on it, your kids are.

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Speaker 3: Going to be more curious than ever.

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Speaker 2: And they'll get sneaky because I mean ten and eleven

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Speaker 2: year olds, they know how to get sneaky.

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Speaker 4: But we had a conversation last week with Michael Parker,

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Speaker 4: Oh yes, about how to have important conversations with your

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Speaker 4: kids that really matter.

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Speaker 2: And Michael Parker, principle at Newington College in Sydney, wrote

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Speaker 2: a book called Talk with Your Kids About Things that

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Speaker 2: Matter How to have these conversations.

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Speaker 4: I think Michael's going to get a plug just about

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Speaker 4: every conversation we have because every time people ask questions.

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Speaker 4: It's really about being able to have these intelligent conversations

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Speaker 4: with our children where we draw out their values as

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Speaker 4: we have these conversations and such explore what all this means.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, hey, I just want to quickly quote as well

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Speaker 2: from Leoni Smith. She's the cyber safety Lady. You can

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Speaker 2: follow her on Facebook. Leoni does a really great job

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Speaker 2: in keeping people up to date with what's going on

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Speaker 2: as well. And I'm not into roadblocks. Our kids aren't

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Speaker 2: into rowblocks. But I was looking for some more resources here,

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Speaker 2: and this is what she said. If you've got kids

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Speaker 2: who are playing squid games on roadblocks, here's what you

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Speaker 2: need to know. I was playing one with another thirteen

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Speaker 2: year old account on the weekend, and I think it

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Speaker 2: was a bit too scary for any under thirteen year old.

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Speaker 2: You die several times before you get the hang out

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Speaker 2: of some of the games being shot off. You get

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Speaker 2: shot or your fall. I played in the most popular version.

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Speaker 2: It was pretty scary. And then she edited an updated

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Speaker 2: and said I played several other versions today and there

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Speaker 2: were some really scary versions that were way more graphic

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Speaker 2: and scary than the first one I played. She's taken

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Speaker 2: some picks and out of them to her Facebook post.

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Speaker 2: There are over three hundred games on the squid game theme.

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Speaker 2: It depends on which one your child's playing, and she's

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Speaker 2: basically just said these games are not for kids, and

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Speaker 2: don't let your kids play roadblock squid games because it's really,

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Speaker 2: really gross. So I guess it just comes back to

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Speaker 2: the whole thing. Parents. We need to monitor what's going on.

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Speaker 2: We need to ask questions, explore, get curious, not furious,

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Speaker 2: explain what our expectations are and why let them know

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Speaker 2: that it's normal to want to know and then empower

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Speaker 2: them so that they can work out what will they

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Speaker 2: do when their friends are talking about it.

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Speaker 3: It's interesting.

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Speaker 4: We've had this conversation a couple of times now, but

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Speaker 4: the more we know our children's friends and their families,

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Speaker 4: the more we get to actually have a say in

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Speaker 4: the village that we build.

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Speaker 3: So many times our kids have come home.

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Speaker 4: And everybody's doing it, and I've gone there's no way

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Speaker 4: everyone's doing this. And I'll ring one of the parents

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Speaker 4: and say, hey, my kid's talking about this, what's your

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Speaker 4: kids doing And they'll be like, oh, no, we don't

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Speaker 4: do that in our house. And all of a sudden,

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Speaker 4: I've got an ally, I've got someone that allowed just

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Speaker 4: gives me permission to feel stronger in my stand and

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Speaker 4: I think as parents, we need to droll it together. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: we're worried about all of us are worried about our children,

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Speaker 4: and if we just you know, kind of look out

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Speaker 4: for each other and kind of give each other.

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Speaker 2: The support the backup. Yeah, Yeah, this is tough.

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Speaker 3: This stuff's tough.

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Speaker 2: So the village have those conversations. We hope that this

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Speaker 2: has been a helpful podcast. The village is also good

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Speaker 2: for other things, like crying when you get a bad haircut.

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Speaker 4: No, I don't want to feel it when I have

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Speaker 4: a bad haircut. I need a hat.

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Speaker 2: I've got to finish that. When we were talking about

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Speaker 2: whether we were going to cancel Friday night, you basically said,

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Speaker 2: I will only go out with you if we can

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Speaker 2: eat in the dark while I'm wearing your hat. And

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Speaker 2: then you've got an abendan cried. Hey. We hope that

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Speaker 2: the podcast has been helpful for you, not about haircuts,

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Speaker 2: not about wiping dogs bumbs with the toilet paper, but

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Speaker 2: about squid game. Thank you so much for listening. If

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Speaker 2: you have any questions, you can contact us podcasts at

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Speaker 2: Happy Families dot com dot au. That's podcasts with an

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Speaker 2: s at happy Families dot com dot au. The Happy

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Speaker 2: Families podcast is produced by Justin Ruland's from Bridge Media.

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Speaker 2: Craig Bruce is our executive producer. If you would like

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Speaker 2: more info about how you can make your family happier,

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Speaker 2: including checking out our Happy Families memberships, please visit us

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Speaker 2: on Facebook or our website. Oh and a quicker reminder tonight,

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Speaker 2: if you have a child with ADHD, we're doing an

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Speaker 2: adhd Answers webinar It's happening tonight. All the information at

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Speaker 2: happyfamilies dot com dot au