Speaker 1: Are you ready to meet someone weird?
Speaker 2: We'll get to that bit soon, but now it's time
Speaker 2: to faught over me.
Speaker 1: I'm the Gordo's at Simone, and being ridiculously good looking
Speaker 1: isn't the.
Speaker 2: Only thing I'm good at.
Speaker 1: I'm shockingly good at uncovering who people really are, whether
Speaker 1: it's a naughty little secret or something that they're into
Speaker 1: that's very strange. I will uncover what they're concealing. This
Speaker 1: is concealed. But met Simone. All right, let's not drag
Speaker 1: on any longer.
Speaker 3: Rall that time?
Speaker 4: Hello, Simone and someone you know. You know me very well,
Speaker 4: except there's one thing that I've been concealing from you.
Speaker 4: I have a skill that some people consider that I
Speaker 4: am the best in the world are So not only
Speaker 4: do you have to guess what I'm concealing, but you
Speaker 4: need to guess who I am.
Speaker 2: This is cook, Oh my god, this is a horror film.
Speaker 1: Okay, So I guess we're doing things differently here this week.
Speaker 1: My guest this week is anonymous. So far I don't
Speaker 1: know who they are. I can't see them. What I
Speaker 1: have in front of me is a hooded and masked
Speaker 1: figure scarily looking at me. Across from the studio. I
Speaker 1: only see two little eye holes, but I can't see
Speaker 1: beyond them. I see a little flash of a reflection
Speaker 1: from a pupil every now and then, but I'm very,
Speaker 1: very worried and confused, and I don't know what they
Speaker 1: sound like because we've got a voice changer on them
Speaker 1: as well. So that's what's sitting in front of me.
Speaker 1: But the way we do things that conceal it is
Speaker 1: I'm going to ask our guests three questions, and from
Speaker 1: the answers from the three questions, I need to work
Speaker 1: out not only what they're concealing, but.
Speaker 2: Also how the hell they are.
Speaker 1: So guest, anonymous figure, scary horror movie person, The first
Speaker 1: question I have for you is do I know you
Speaker 1: from this special skill?
Speaker 4: You know me through one of my skills, but the
Speaker 4: one I'm concealing is much more unusual, and no one
Speaker 4: would believe the two can work together.
Speaker 1: Okay, all right, so I know you from a different skill. Okay,
Speaker 1: two different skill. No one would believe the two could
Speaker 1: work together. Okay, so the one there, I know you
Speaker 1: from one skill, but this world's best skill is something else.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 1: Question number two, anonymous figure, how long have you been
Speaker 1: working on this best in the world skill.
Speaker 4: I've been perfecting this skill for many years. In fact,
Speaker 4: when I was running around in nature working on it,
Speaker 4: you were busy listening to my chemical romance and learning
Speaker 4: the drums as an instant teenager.
Speaker 1: This is getting creepy. I don't like this. Am I
Speaker 1: able to leave? Can I quit this episode? Can we
Speaker 1: end now? When I was a teenager, you were running
Speaker 1: around in nature perfecting whatever this skill is. Okay, nature?
Speaker 1: Oh I could be on on the Maybe you are
Speaker 1: a landscaper. Maybe you work for Jim's mowing and you've
Speaker 1: been doing it since I was fifteen. Okay, okay, all right,
Speaker 1: final question? Then, a final question I have for you?
Speaker 1: Is you say that I know you? Do we have
Speaker 1: a relationship you? Or are you someone I know of?
Speaker 4: Birds of a feather flock together?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Okay, all right, okay, birds of it?
Speaker 1: Okay, So you must be a drag queen or something
Speaker 1: related to that, because or you could be you have
Speaker 1: to be a drag queen. I don't know anyone else
Speaker 1: other than drag queens. I don't have many friends or acquaintances.
Speaker 2: Oh, this is tough. Okay, let's look at our facts.
Speaker 4: All right.
Speaker 1: I know you from something and something that I do
Speaker 1: as well, So it has to be drag or performing
Speaker 1: or just being really sexy. Maybe it's that being sexy people.
Speaker 1: And all right, so you've been doing this your best skill,
Speaker 1: the best in the world's good, been working on since
Speaker 1: I was a teenager, so that was, oh, good luck.
Speaker 1: Over a decade, am I twenty eight? Yep, that's definitely me,
Speaker 1: all right. And Birds of a Feather okay, So I
Speaker 1: mean I've got nothing, so I'm just gonna do a
Speaker 1: wild guess. I'm going to say that birds of a
Speaker 1: Feather Okay, you are. It's the thirtieth anniversary of Priscilla. Okay,
Speaker 1: so let's go Priscilla. Oh my god, I'm going to
Speaker 1: say that you are Hugo Weaving and you know how
Speaker 1: to drive bus.
Speaker 3: Hi.
Speaker 5: My name is etcetera, etcetera, and I'm an internationally recognized
Speaker 5: drag artist. I know Aunt Simone from season one of
Speaker 5: Ruffle's Drag Race down Under. But what she might not
Speaker 5: know about me is as a teenager, I was an
Speaker 5: avid twitcher, which is the colloquial term for a bird watcher.
Speaker 3: Ah.
Speaker 1: Oh no, it's not a Hugo Weaving from the film Priscilla.
Speaker 1: It's my good friend, it't citra e cra How does
Speaker 1: she hide this from me? And she twitches? Well, I've
Speaker 1: always noticed a little twitch, but this is a big twitch.
Speaker 2: But how does she do it?
Speaker 6: Oh?
Speaker 2: All right, so we're not here with Hugo Weaving.
Speaker 1: In fact, it is my drag sister, miss et cetera,
Speaker 1: et cetera.
Speaker 2: Hello, Dowling, how are you?
Speaker 3: Ah?
Speaker 6: Hi on?
Speaker 5: I hope I'm a welcome surprise.
Speaker 6: I hope.
Speaker 5: I just thought you have a successful podcast, though I
Speaker 5: want to slice to the pie and I've come crawling in.
Speaker 1: Well, look, I do have issue because you've done me
Speaker 1: up in look the looks department. You've done very well
Speaker 1: with the way you look. But luckily, for a lot
Speaker 1: of our listeners, they're just listening. So would you like
Speaker 1: to describe how beautiful you look right now?
Speaker 4: Though?
Speaker 5: Yeah, I look really beautiful and stunning and gorgeous. I'm
Speaker 5: wearing a large asparagus green vig Yes, I smell a
Speaker 5: little like asparagus too, really, And I'm wearing a beautiful
Speaker 5: multicolored Gingham velvet blazer set with a neon green bias binding.
Speaker 5: That matches my acrylic nails that I have perfectly applied.
Speaker 1: And they are absolutely stunning. So so yeah, look, when
Speaker 1: they said drag queen, I was hoping it would be
Speaker 1: you because they could have, you know, paired me up
Speaker 1: with some dog that I don't actually like, and they
Speaker 1: thought I locked because I'm really good at faking everything.
Speaker 1: So it is a happy surprise to see you here
Speaker 1: today in front of me.
Speaker 5: Oh, you could sound a bit more genuine. It is
Speaker 5: a happy surprise. Yeah, No, it's great to be here.
Speaker 5: I've been waiting for this day to jump scare you
Speaker 5: on your own podcast, and here we are.
Speaker 2: Boom, here we are.
Speaker 1: So you've been concealing a talent from me that I
Speaker 1: had no idea about. And I feel like I know
Speaker 1: a lot about you and I've not heard about this.
Speaker 1: And when you first said Twitcher, let's clarify that's nothing
Speaker 1: to do with the platform Twitch, in which people stream
Speaker 1: gaming on low on.
Speaker 5: I'm not a nerd, so I don't know what that is. No,
Speaker 5: I'm joking because my special skill is actually potentially the
Speaker 5: most nerdy thing about me. It is the most the
Speaker 5: most uncool thing about me, and yet the most exciting.
Speaker 1: I was going to say, are you comfortable to share
Speaker 1: this with the world, because I think it's really going
Speaker 1: to paint you in a different light.
Speaker 5: Well, I was rather going to share this. I'm going
Speaker 5: to release my sex tape online, and I thought that
Speaker 5: this would be slightly better for myself and my mum
Speaker 5: probably won't get mad at me. No, my skill set
Speaker 5: is far more tame. It's actually something most people would
Speaker 5: not ever think about in their entire lives.
Speaker 2: So tell us about twitching.
Speaker 1: When we're not talking about involuntary convulsions, we're talking about
Speaker 1: what is that identifying bird sounds.
Speaker 5: So twitching is the colloquial term for people in the know,
Speaker 5: for bird watchers and people who enjoy orthonology, which is
Speaker 5: the study of birds. Twitching is the informal name given
Speaker 5: to people that like to meet up on weekends, go
Speaker 5: out and spot a few birds in the wild, have
Speaker 5: a drummage for a few turkeys in the bush, if
Speaker 5: you pardon the expression. Yeah, So I was a twitter
Speaker 5: as a teenager. I'd go out to the bush with
Speaker 5: groups of men in their late early sixties and I'd
Speaker 5: just have a look through some binoculars for different kinds
Speaker 5: of bird. Species. I'd wander through the paths of wonder
Speaker 5: in my local botanical gardens, hoping to catch a wren
Speaker 5: or a robin or maybe even a rooster.
Speaker 1: I feel like I've watched a documentary on this exact thing.
Speaker 1: So're you hanging out with old men in the forest.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean they were young at heart, but you're
Speaker 5: an old soul. My grandfather used to accompany me to
Speaker 5: make it less weird, and I'd tag along with him,
Speaker 5: so he'd be like, he'd pretend he was more into birds,
Speaker 5: so I would go with him, but he's actually scared
Speaker 5: of birds. So, I mean, the things that people that
Speaker 5: you love do for you.
Speaker 2: So what sparked this interest of bird watching and twitching.
Speaker 5: I didn't have many friends growing up, so a lot
Speaker 5: of time outside just kind of wandering around in the forest.
Speaker 5: Now I'm not even joking, this is exactly how. And
Speaker 5: I used to see the birds flitting from tree to
Speaker 5: tree and just thought, Wow, they've got something going on
Speaker 5: that I'd like to have you know some knowledge about.
Speaker 5: And I remember I bought a little field guide of
Speaker 5: birds Australian native birds, and I was like, you know what.
Speaker 5: By the end of the year, I'm gonna I want
Speaker 5: to have seen every single one, and I set myself
Speaker 5: a goal and it kind of turned into a full
Speaker 5: blown obsession.
Speaker 1: Did the birds take over your lof you know it was?
Speaker 1: Was it all about the birds for a bit?
Speaker 5: It was so about the birds that would I was
Speaker 5: carrying around a fueld guide with me, like to and
Speaker 5: from school to and from like everything I did. My
Speaker 5: parents would have to take it away from me before
Speaker 5: I went to sleep. Like I would be up at
Speaker 5: night looking through my windows with binoculars hoping to catch
Speaker 5: a night jar or a powerful owl or some species
Speaker 5: of that nature. It was really affecting my life. Probably, Yeah,
Speaker 5: obsession is the right word.
Speaker 1: Would you say this is almost like Pokemon, but in
Speaker 1: real life because you were going through your field book
Speaker 1: trying what happens when you find one? You just tick
Speaker 1: it off a list? Do you go and pluck a feather?
Speaker 1: Do you record the audio to prove that you heard
Speaker 1: it or saw it?
Speaker 5: Well, people just have to kind of take your word
Speaker 5: for it. But I did have this big almost like
Speaker 5: a spreadsheet printed out onto paper with all of the species,
Speaker 5: and I'd write down the time of the sighting, the
Speaker 5: date of the siding and the location, and then I
Speaker 5: could go back and flick through and have a look
Speaker 5: and reminisce about all the good times I spent with
Speaker 5: all of my bird friends.
Speaker 1: The bird sounds always the same? Or is there a
Speaker 1: differentiation from bird to bird but on the same species.
Speaker 5: Would you say, oh, bird sounds are so different. You
Speaker 5: would not believe the variety of sounds that birds can make,
Speaker 5: and even within the species, from juveniles to adults, from
Speaker 5: male to female birds. And I used to be really good.
Speaker 5: I used to be so good that I used to
Speaker 5: be able to identify, like whether it was a young
Speaker 5: bird or an old bird, or whether it was a
Speaker 5: bird starting its migration or finishing its migration. These days,
Speaker 5: I've been in the concrete jungle for a while. Now,
Speaker 5: I reckon I can do species. That's what I've got
Speaker 5: under my belt.
Speaker 1: Yet would you have to I don't know YouTube to
Speaker 1: know what sounds you listen for, or because they can't
Speaker 1: write in a field book, you know cocal like is
Speaker 1: there a different spelling on how to describe the sounds?
Speaker 5: Or that's where you're so wrong art? And I wouldn't
Speaker 5: I wouldn't blame you as a as a novice in
Speaker 5: this field. But there there are phonetic spellings different joke, Yes,
Speaker 5: in the field, guy, there's phonetic spellings like a.
Speaker 3: You know, like they.
Speaker 7: Spell it t W I T with a little like
Speaker 7: little lats or anything, or it's just a wash with lauch.
Speaker 7: Oh way, Yeah, it's really They've almost built another language
Speaker 7: for me.
Speaker 5: Top. And I didn't just listen. I spoke back. I
Speaker 5: would know you're not hearing me, I would I learned
Speaker 5: the language of the birds. Wow, so fluently?
Speaker 2: Could you have conversations with them?
Speaker 5: Well, he's actually a funny story. When I was in
Speaker 5: primary school, I was in year six and I had
Speaker 5: not many friends because I'd repeated year six, that boring story.
Speaker 5: Who cares? But I would spend all of my lunchtimes
Speaker 5: on the school oval and bird watching, of course, and
Speaker 5: there was this little pod of magpis that would gather
Speaker 5: every lunchtime and kind of scuttle around, and I started
Speaker 5: talking to them, you know, giving them at Oh.
Speaker 2: That's actually very good.
Speaker 5: Yeah. I used to be better before my voice broke.
Speaker 5: But you know, birds don't go through puberty apparently. Anyway.
Speaker 5: I would sing to the magpies and feed them little worms,
Speaker 5: and they used to come up to me and we'd
Speaker 5: have little conversations and hang out at lunchtime. It was
Speaker 5: all great until one day I was sitting in class
Speaker 5: and I heard a tapping on classroom window and all
Speaker 5: of the magpies were outside the window tapping. And then
Speaker 5: they one day they came into the school corridors and
Speaker 5: started tracking me down to find me in the classroom.
Speaker 5: And after that I was banned from speaking to the magpies.
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, because yeah, I really, I kind of like
Speaker 5: indoctrinated them a bit, and I think I made them
Speaker 5: dependent on me like some big mother bird.
Speaker 1: Could you give me because I'm just so impressed by
Speaker 1: your magpie, could you give me a couple of other
Speaker 1: bird noises for me?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 5: I could give you. Okay, let me give you a
Speaker 5: yellowtail black cockatook Okay wait wowow okay is that one?
Speaker 5: I've got an eastern whip bird Okay, okay, okay. Oh,
Speaker 5: I'll do a lie bird, but I'll do a liarbird
Speaker 5: that is copying me. Hi, my name's etcetera, etcetera. That's
Speaker 5: what a liarbird would say if it was around me.
Speaker 1: And what would a libird sound like copying you doing
Speaker 1: an Eastern whip thing.
Speaker 5: Probably that they actually make chainsaw noises and everything. It's
Speaker 5: kind of crazy. You can be in the bush and
Speaker 5: you just hear like a chainsaw running and you're like, well,
Speaker 5: they're coming to get me.
Speaker 1: So has there been any moments in your life where
Speaker 1: your special skill has come in handy as a twitter?
Speaker 2: No, except for this moment right here.
Speaker 5: Well, actually, the only moments that I think it has
Speaker 5: been good is kind of like at a party, you
Speaker 5: do an ice breaker to get to know people and
Speaker 5: hopefully get them to like you. When I meet someone
Speaker 5: at a party and I want them to leave me
Speaker 5: alone immediately, I just start talking about it. Hey, do
Speaker 5: you know what I was a teen interested in birds?
Speaker 5: Do you want me to do some bird calls for you?
Speaker 5: Suddenly know what to be seen? It's perfect.
Speaker 1: So I want to clarify something because in your introduction
Speaker 1: you did say you were the best at the world this.
Speaker 1: Now do you officially hold this title or are we
Speaker 1: just leaning into your own delusion?
Speaker 5: I would say I would say out of those in
Speaker 5: the world who do it, there, I would be fairly good.
Speaker 5: If you put us all in a room together, I
Speaker 5: would be one of the one of the top hundreds.
Speaker 1: What this sounds like, sounds like you've lied on your
Speaker 1: resime just to get on the podcast.
Speaker 5: Is this true? Well, you did ask me to impersonate
Speaker 5: a liar bird, didn't you? And I'm a bird that lies.
Speaker 1: So you haven't stayed in the field of bird watching
Speaker 1: and you know bird calls. You've moved into a different career,
Speaker 1: which I don't know if I'm outing you here, but
Speaker 1: is drag You are a drag queen?
Speaker 5: Oh my god? How could you tell?
Speaker 3: Do you.
Speaker 1: Think there's any crossover there's been any crossover for you? Like,
Speaker 1: have you been able to identify drag queens squawking down
Speaker 1: Oxford Street? Or is there any kind of integration between
Speaker 1: the two industries.
Speaker 5: I mean, to be honest, most drag queens are too
Speaker 5: broke to afford nice feathers, So normally I'm just seeing
Speaker 5: a chicken or a maraboo strutting around, which isn't the
Speaker 5: most exciting bird.
Speaker 4: Look.
Speaker 5: To be honest, it's all color and movement. It's all
Speaker 5: color and movement, And I think I've become the bird,
Speaker 5: like a magpie or a little bower bird collects little
Speaker 5: trinkets and things for their nest to increase the chances
Speaker 5: of being able to find a mate. I collect little
Speaker 5: things so I can increase my chances of maybe one
Speaker 5: day owning property in Sydney. Yeah, and that's that's my version.
Speaker 5: One day I will be a bird enough to buy
Speaker 5: a house.
Speaker 1: I want to put your claims to the two because
Speaker 1: I still don't believe any of this. All right, So
Speaker 1: what I'm going to be doing is playing some bird
Speaker 1: noises for you, and you have to identify what bird is.
Speaker 2: Can you do that? Oh?
Speaker 5: Absolutely, Yeah, I'm fully prepared. I've got it. I've got
Speaker 5: it on lock.
Speaker 2: Okay, all right, first bird sound effect?
Speaker 5: Oh okay, now let me tell you what that is.
Speaker 5: You may not know it from my earlier impression, but
Speaker 5: that's an Eastern whipper.
Speaker 2: That is an Eastern whip bird.
Speaker 1: Okay, you've got that one one down, all right, Yeah,
Speaker 1: you can still have your claim to fame.
Speaker 2: Sound number two.
Speaker 5: Here we go. Yep. You'd think that was my knees
Speaker 5: when I stand up, but that's actually a ganggang cocka.
Speaker 2: Okay, that is correct.
Speaker 1: I also would have accepted one of the fung guy
Speaker 1: people from the last of us, the clickers would accepted that.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's good.
Speaker 2: Okay. Bird three? What's that?
Speaker 5: I believe that would be a magpie?
Speaker 6: Wrong?
Speaker 5: Was it currawong?
Speaker 3: Wrong?
Speaker 5: What is that?
Speaker 2: That's a noisy fryer bird.
Speaker 5: That's a noisy fryer bird.
Speaker 2: Oh okay, you've got two out of three so far.
Speaker 5: I've said that ain't bad. Bird number four okay.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't like that one.
Speaker 5: What's that home? I think that might be? Is that
Speaker 5: a musk duck? No, this is going really well for me.
Speaker 5: Wait what is that?
Speaker 2: It's a cassillary?
Speaker 5: Oh see it.
Speaker 2: Also sounded a bit like an e because the emos
Speaker 2: do that same.
Speaker 5: Little never got near one of those.
Speaker 2: Oh so you didn't collect them in your book?
Speaker 5: Well, not many of them down in Canberra.
Speaker 2: Well okay, okay, this is the break up.
Speaker 1: This is what's going to define whether you are in
Speaker 1: the world's best or you're a cheap phony.
Speaker 2: It's our final one.
Speaker 5: Okay, are you ready?
Speaker 2: Here we go me? What bird was that?
Speaker 5: Is that? Road runner? I'm the best, I'm the best
Speaker 5: in the world.
Speaker 1: Okay, et cetera. C keep your claim to fame as
Speaker 1: the best in the world.
Speaker 2: At twitching. Oh well done.
Speaker 5: How do you feel that actually stressed me out? I'm
Speaker 5: in that stressed ages. I can't believe it.
Speaker 1: Wow, well you maybe I believe you a little bit now,
Speaker 1: maybe just a bit.
Speaker 5: Well, you know what, Thank you, because but my childhood
Speaker 5: without friends to be able to correctly identify some birds
Speaker 5: and maybe one day we can go bird watching together.
Speaker 2: That we'd lovely take me out into the forest with
Speaker 2: some old men.
Speaker 5: I was trying so hard not to laugh under that, Mars,
Speaker 5: that was the hardest part not to laugh.
Speaker 1: You've been listening to an iHeart Australia production can seal
Speaker 1: it with art Simone.
Speaker 2: Listen to more of what
Speaker 1: You love on iHeart and if you're fond of a
Speaker 1: two faced twitch, check us out on the socials.