WEBVTT - What to do when you get told you’re too much… 0:00:00.520 --> 0:00:03.640 I'd like to acknowledge the traditional owners on which this 0:00:03.720 --> 0:00:08.160 episode is being recorded, the combo marry people. We pay 0:00:08.320 --> 0:00:12.360 our respects to elders past, present and emerging and extend 0:00:12.480 --> 0:00:16.520 that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples. 0:00:16.560 --> 0:00:24.279 Today I'm your host, Georgie Stevenson, and this is the 0:00:24.400 --> 0:00:32.080 Rise and Conquer Podcast. This is the podcast where which 0:00:32.120 --> 0:00:36.560 have mindset, self development and becoming your higher self mix 0:00:36.640 --> 0:00:39.440 soon with a lot of laughs, plus behind the scenes 0:00:39.479 --> 0:00:43.040 of my life running two businesses and being among Think 0:00:43.080 --> 0:00:45.599 of us as the perfect combo of brunch with your 0:00:45.640 --> 0:00:49.239 besties mixed with self development. No matter where you are 0:00:49.320 --> 0:00:52.040 in your journey, We're here to help you be curious, 0:00:52.280 --> 0:00:55.640 pull yourself out, and embrace radical self awareness. 0:00:57.520 --> 0:00:58.840 If you're ready to get into. 0:00:58.760 --> 0:01:01.560 The driver's seat of your own life and stop letting 0:01:01.560 --> 0:01:04.399 life past you by, then you're in the right place. 0:01:10.440 --> 0:01:13.720 Hello and welcome back to the ron C Potty. On 0:01:13.800 --> 0:01:19.279 today's episode, we are unpacking the concept of being too much, 0:01:19.920 --> 0:01:23.560 what it actually means about you, about the person saying it, 0:01:23.640 --> 0:01:26.800 and how you can move forward. We also chat about 0:01:26.880 --> 0:01:29.399 do you actually need to change your behavior or is 0:01:29.440 --> 0:01:32.520 this something you can brush off. So if you've ever 0:01:32.600 --> 0:01:35.440 been told that you're too much of anything, too much, 0:01:35.520 --> 0:01:38.800 too excited, too loud, too dramatic, too selfish, then you're 0:01:38.800 --> 0:01:41.360 gonna love this episode. I also, I do a bit 0:01:41.400 --> 0:01:44.640 of a spin because I think the people who click 0:01:44.680 --> 0:01:46.880 on this episode and then listen, you're probably not going 0:01:46.959 --> 0:01:50.720 to expect what I say. So true, but it's a goodie. 0:01:50.880 --> 0:01:53.600 Keep listening. But before we get into the episode of tea, 0:01:53.640 --> 0:01:56.760 I just want to remind the ron C community. Our 0:01:57.080 --> 0:02:03.320 limited edition Life Happens for Me journaling boxes launch tomorrow 0:02:03.400 --> 0:02:06.680 at five pm. Set your alarms if you're listening in 0:02:06.720 --> 0:02:08.800 real time? Yeah, which is the nineteenth? 0:02:08.880 --> 0:02:09.560 Is it nineteenth? 0:02:09.639 --> 0:02:13.560 The nineteenth of April? Tomorrow, the nineteenth of April, five pm. 0:02:13.880 --> 0:02:17.799 They are limited edition. They include our beautiful journal, our 0:02:17.840 --> 0:02:21.200 beautiful Life Happens for Me glass that's secure little pink 0:02:21.240 --> 0:02:24.080 bubble mug that you've seen around I've been showing you guys. 0:02:25.360 --> 0:02:31.000 It includes a beautiful butterfly diffuser, a signature RNC sent 0:02:31.280 --> 0:02:34.359 Oh my god, it's incredible. It's grounding but also activating. 0:02:34.680 --> 0:02:35.840 So guys, set your alarm. 0:02:35.919 --> 0:02:39.120 It's limited edition, and ten dollars from every single box 0:02:39.600 --> 0:02:43.880 does go to Pink Elephants Support Network, who support women 0:02:44.040 --> 0:02:48.760 going through early miscarriages. Such a beautiful charity to partner 0:02:48.800 --> 0:02:51.760 with on this and we are so proud and yeah, 0:02:51.840 --> 0:02:57.560 so we're so excited. Georgie, what's your weekly recommendation? Well, okay, 0:02:57.680 --> 0:03:01.320 so how do I explain this? Well, I'm dabbling with 0:03:01.360 --> 0:03:04.160 the idea. I'm not fully there, but I was telling 0:03:04.200 --> 0:03:07.000 the girls. We had a team lunch a couple of 0:03:07.040 --> 0:03:11.160 weeks ago, and I was telling the girls that I've 0:03:11.160 --> 0:03:16.240 really been playing with this idea to fully stop consuming 0:03:16.280 --> 0:03:19.880 content that scares me. 0:03:20.280 --> 0:03:23.200 So just in the way of I just. 0:03:23.320 --> 0:03:28.640 Noticed how much, you know, social media, Netflix was consuming 0:03:28.680 --> 0:03:29.160 my time. 0:03:29.360 --> 0:03:31.280 And I don't think I'm gonna go. 0:03:31.320 --> 0:03:34.680 Cold turkey, but I'm just, I guess taking it up 0:03:34.680 --> 0:03:38.640 a notch with how intentional I'm being. No Netflix during 0:03:38.680 --> 0:03:42.240 the week. I can watch Netflix on the weekend with 0:03:42.320 --> 0:03:45.080 Tim as like a me and him thing, But no 0:03:45.280 --> 0:03:47.880 Netflix during the week unless it's a documentary. 0:03:48.040 --> 0:03:50.920 That's the rule. You would to shut your mouth. 0:03:51.040 --> 0:03:55.240 You guys can see my face. His mouth's open so wide. 0:03:56.000 --> 0:04:01.360 He shocked Wow and off social media media by seven 0:04:01.480 --> 0:04:04.800 seven point thirty, even though that's more because Ivy goes 0:04:04.800 --> 0:04:06.760 to bed at six. We have dinner and then I 0:04:06.880 --> 0:04:09.280 check my social media. But then once I get in bed, 0:04:09.320 --> 0:04:12.280 it's like off social media. Tim's actually deleted all his 0:04:12.360 --> 0:04:16.240 social media apps. I know he's currently going through a 0:04:16.279 --> 0:04:18.000 bit of a self development journey, and he's like, I 0:04:18.040 --> 0:04:20.479 love that, I just need to delete them because he 0:04:20.600 --> 0:04:23.159 just finds he wastes so much shine on them. So 0:04:23.480 --> 0:04:27.880 just more this idea of being so intentionable. And as 0:04:27.880 --> 0:04:29.760 you guys know, I do have a coach at the moment, 0:04:29.960 --> 0:04:33.679 and it's it's a one on one vibe. But also 0:04:33.800 --> 0:04:35.680 as a byproductor of that, I get a lot of 0:04:35.720 --> 0:04:39.520 you know, her course content. And so what I'm doing 0:04:39.760 --> 0:04:45.279 is like just like immersing myself completely in when I'm 0:04:45.320 --> 0:04:48.640 not working, It's like I'm doing self development, or I'm 0:04:48.720 --> 0:04:51.880 reading a book, or I'm in the sauna. I'm not scrolling, 0:04:52.080 --> 0:04:55.560 I'm not just watching random things to like, you know, 0:04:56.960 --> 0:04:59.560 I'm just being very intentional. Yeah, and so I will 0:04:59.600 --> 0:05:02.680 update this is a new thing. But I'm also just 0:05:02.720 --> 0:05:05.120 like I'm speaking it because it also gives me a 0:05:05.120 --> 0:05:09.239 bit of an accountability of And I said to the girls, 0:05:09.560 --> 0:05:12.720 I wonder what could shift and change if I stuck 0:05:12.760 --> 0:05:17.520 to this. So that's all I'm saying. Who knows, I 0:05:17.560 --> 0:05:19.560 love that. I'm just being very honest with you. So 0:05:19.640 --> 0:05:23.880 my weekly recommendation is, can you check in maybe do 0:05:23.960 --> 0:05:27.400 a bit of an audit of where you're currently not 0:05:27.480 --> 0:05:31.000 being intentional with what you consume? I love that. What's 0:05:31.000 --> 0:05:33.440 your weekly good solid watch? 0:05:33.440 --> 0:05:37.080 Your Netflix recommendation? A tear? I have two. 0:05:39.120 --> 0:05:42.360 One recommendation is Netflix. One is not because I felt 0:05:42.360 --> 0:05:44.400 like I needed to bring something else to the table. 0:05:45.120 --> 0:05:49.479 So my first recommendation, which is Netflix, is the Night 0:05:49.760 --> 0:05:51.880 Agent series. 0:05:52.520 --> 0:05:53.719 I started watching this. 0:05:54.080 --> 0:05:56.600 You didn't like it, no, when it first came out 0:05:56.640 --> 0:05:59.279 a couple of weeks ago. Yeah, I just thought it 0:05:59.360 --> 0:06:00.000 was really bored. 0:06:00.600 --> 0:06:01.480 Oh I loved it. 0:06:01.920 --> 0:06:04.599 I'm in polar opposite. It's like the first TV series 0:06:04.640 --> 0:06:07.520 I've watched in such a long time that I was like, no, 0:06:07.880 --> 0:06:10.919 I'm gonna watch this an episode at a time over 0:06:11.000 --> 0:06:14.279 a few days because I needed to give my attention 0:06:14.360 --> 0:06:16.599 to it, Like I couldn't cook and watch. 0:06:16.440 --> 0:06:17.280 Yeah kind of thing. 0:06:17.720 --> 0:06:20.279 I just I'm not vibe in the whole like White House. 0:06:20.720 --> 0:06:23.640 Oh okay, I love them. I love those. If you've 0:06:23.680 --> 0:06:26.440 like if you like White House, down or like Olympus's Fallen, 0:06:26.520 --> 0:06:27.400 those kind of movies. 0:06:27.520 --> 0:06:30.560 I like scandals. I didn't like Scandal. 0:06:30.680 --> 0:06:38.640 Okay, what'll she next? My second recommendation is an episode 0:06:38.760 --> 0:06:41.719 of the Life on Cut podcast that I listened to. 0:06:42.120 --> 0:06:46.840 It's called Matthew Hussey does Not Give a F Word 0:06:47.040 --> 0:06:50.960 about Your Relationship, and it's an interview with a man 0:06:51.040 --> 0:06:53.960 named Matthew Hussey, and he's like a very very well 0:06:54.040 --> 0:06:59.320 known relationship expert, and I just loved hearing his perspective 0:06:59.360 --> 0:07:02.400 on stuff. I'd seen videos of him for years, like 0:07:02.480 --> 0:07:04.440 he's been on YouTube for years. If you look at 0:07:04.440 --> 0:07:07.760 his face, you'll probably know him. And what I really 0:07:07.800 --> 0:07:10.920 loved that they spoke about was the concept of needing 0:07:11.000 --> 0:07:13.560 to be your whole self fixed and ready for a 0:07:13.600 --> 0:07:16.720 relationship before you get into one, and how he doesn't. 0:07:16.520 --> 0:07:17.040 Agree with that. 0:07:18.640 --> 0:07:21.360 So it's a really, really great interview and I'd highly 0:07:21.360 --> 0:07:24.960 recommend that to pretty much everyone. I love that. 0:07:24.960 --> 0:07:26.320 That's actually so interesting. 0:07:26.440 --> 0:07:27.640 I was reading a quote. 0:07:27.880 --> 0:07:28.680 I will literally take. 0:07:28.560 --> 0:07:31.760 A photo it because Kay I thought of this exact thing, 0:07:31.920 --> 0:07:35.520 and it was kind of this quote about yeah, not 0:07:35.760 --> 0:07:38.760 agreeing that you know how it's like to love some 0:07:39.120 --> 0:07:42.280 I've got it. It's like to love someone how to 0:07:42.360 --> 0:07:46.160 love yourself first before someone can love you. Yes, and 0:07:46.600 --> 0:07:49.360 it was saying, we don't agree with that quote because 0:07:49.640 --> 0:07:52.520 you need someone to show like you need to be 0:07:52.600 --> 0:07:55.400 shown how to love first. Yeah? 0:07:55.560 --> 0:07:57.520 Is that him? And we think about that. 0:07:57.520 --> 0:08:00.480 Maybe that is from him because he he was sort 0:08:00.520 --> 0:08:04.040 of along this a similar line. But he also like 0:08:04.200 --> 0:08:08.480 brought up that sometimes you'll have insecurities, but that'll be 0:08:08.560 --> 0:08:12.360 someone's favorite thing. Their favorite thing about you is the 0:08:12.440 --> 0:08:15.400 thing you're insecure about, and they will show you like 0:08:15.480 --> 0:08:19.240 a different way to love yourself almost. Yeah, if that 0:08:19.320 --> 0:08:20.920 makes sense. Yeah, I love that. 0:08:21.120 --> 0:08:22.080 Yeah, and so cool. 0:08:22.160 --> 0:08:26.960 Also about how in relationships it's not necessarily about doing 0:08:27.000 --> 0:08:30.280 everything together, but it's about supporting your partner in whatever 0:08:30.320 --> 0:08:32.760 they want to do. And he spoke about how he 0:08:32.960 --> 0:08:35.240 has some ritual he does in the morning that his 0:08:35.400 --> 0:08:38.080 partner would never do, but he does it like in 0:08:38.120 --> 0:08:40.000 a different room in the house and one time he 0:08:40.040 --> 0:08:42.040 woke up and she'd set up the room perfectly for 0:08:42.160 --> 0:08:43.880 him to do it, and it just meant so much 0:08:43.920 --> 0:08:46.080 to him that even though she didn't do it, she 0:08:46.280 --> 0:08:49.920 respected that he did. But yeah, really get an interviews. 0:08:50.040 --> 0:08:52.440 I'm pulling the most random bits from it. It probably not 0:08:52.440 --> 0:08:53.360 being too convinced. 0:08:53.480 --> 0:08:55.640 No, we love it. Yeah, but I loved it. 0:08:55.840 --> 0:08:57.160 I highly recommend. 0:08:57.559 --> 0:08:58.280 Yeah, awesome. 0:08:58.320 --> 0:09:12.160 All right, let's get into the episode. 0:09:12.720 --> 0:09:14.920 Yeah, well, let's bloody get straight into it. 0:09:15.920 --> 0:09:19.160 So today we're talking of the concept of being too much. 0:09:19.920 --> 0:09:21.120 I love this so much. 0:09:21.559 --> 0:09:24.360 Why because I've had this said to me so many 0:09:24.440 --> 0:09:27.800 times throughout my life, and I feel like most listeners 0:09:27.800 --> 0:09:30.679 would too, one hundred percent. If you're an R and 0:09:30.720 --> 0:09:35.960 C listener, you've probably been told you too much. I like, 0:09:36.200 --> 0:09:38.960 and you know this can be you have been told 0:09:39.160 --> 0:09:42.679 you're too much like in regards to you're too energetically, 0:09:42.760 --> 0:09:47.040 you're too like hyped up, you're too emotional, you're too loud, 0:09:47.040 --> 0:09:49.679 you're too unpredictable, you're too difficult. 0:09:49.760 --> 0:09:50.760 I was the difficult one. 0:09:50.920 --> 0:09:55.040 I was, And I also like, you're too spicy or 0:09:55.160 --> 0:09:58.440 too direct, too dramatic, Oh, so dramatic. It was like, 0:09:58.480 --> 0:10:01.200 my whole childhood is mean getting called dramatic and difficult, 0:10:02.040 --> 0:10:06.320 and also me getting called like selfish. You know, I 0:10:06.360 --> 0:10:09.280 felt like as a child, I held my boundaries really strong, 0:10:09.679 --> 0:10:11.920 and so like I was called like, oh, you're being selfish, 0:10:11.960 --> 0:10:14.720 you're not thinking about the others, but I'm like, no, no. 0:10:14.600 --> 0:10:18.680 I just know my boundaries. Wow, yeah, don't you think 0:10:18.920 --> 0:10:19.240 I was? 0:10:19.679 --> 0:10:22.840 No? I agree in like that definition, but I was 0:10:24.160 --> 0:10:27.560 like a doormat as a kid and through high school. Yeah, 0:10:27.960 --> 0:10:32.600 no boundaries none, a tr I know, But I know 0:10:32.720 --> 0:10:35.760 better now. Yeah, good, I do know better now. And 0:10:35.800 --> 0:10:38.160 like one thing that someone said to me that stuck 0:10:38.160 --> 0:10:41.440 with me. They're like people are dormats and dinosaurs, and 0:10:41.440 --> 0:10:43.160 then then it's like a good in between when it 0:10:43.200 --> 0:10:45.960 comes to like holding your boundaries. But some people who 0:10:46.040 --> 0:10:49.280 are dormats all the time, you'll come out and be 0:10:49.320 --> 0:10:51.680 a dinosaur about the most random thing. And that would 0:10:51.720 --> 0:10:55.439 happen to me, Like I'd have little random almost explosions, 0:10:56.320 --> 0:11:00.000 super super silly things. Yeah, And I couldn't understand why 0:11:00.360 --> 0:11:02.760 until I actually learned that, like, oh, it's because I'm 0:11:02.920 --> 0:11:05.120 letting people push me over for so long and then 0:11:05.520 --> 0:11:08.520 I explode and it balances, but I could just maintain 0:11:08.679 --> 0:11:13.040 balance instead. That self awareness is amazing that you can 0:11:13.080 --> 0:11:16.480 even register that of like I'm not strong enough my boundaries. 0:11:16.480 --> 0:11:18.360 That it's like I let it get to a limit 0:11:18.679 --> 0:11:21.560 and then there's this limit and then I explode rather 0:11:21.640 --> 0:11:24.800 than bringing the boundary back here and it's like this 0:11:24.880 --> 0:11:26.240 actually just gets to be it and. 0:11:26.200 --> 0:11:28.440 Then it doesn't have to come out in a toxic way. 0:11:28.640 --> 0:11:30.880 Yeah, because I used to do that too, like it 0:11:30.920 --> 0:11:33.000 would like build and build and build, and then it 0:11:33.040 --> 0:11:35.120 would come out in this like toxic way because they 0:11:35.120 --> 0:11:36.480 didn't know how to express myself. 0:11:36.640 --> 0:11:40.640 Yes, but going back to it, so I have an 0:11:40.679 --> 0:11:41.680 interesting take on this. 0:11:42.000 --> 0:11:45.040 I feel like this is a conversation we probably had 0:11:45.040 --> 0:11:49.040 on this podcast of being called too much, too much 0:11:49.080 --> 0:11:52.079 of whatever, and I feel like so many people can 0:11:52.120 --> 0:11:56.000 resonate with it, and I think there's two parts to this, 0:11:56.280 --> 0:11:58.640 so I want to speak to both. Yeah, so the 0:11:58.720 --> 0:12:01.600 first part is very much what you probably thought this 0:12:01.640 --> 0:12:05.240 episode was going to be about, where when someone's calling 0:12:05.280 --> 0:12:10.120 you too much, it's very much their responsibility of what 0:12:10.240 --> 0:12:16.600 they define and what's a thing for them, rather than like, actually, 0:12:16.840 --> 0:12:19.680 what's wrong with you kind of thing. There is, though, 0:12:20.240 --> 0:12:22.840 a second part to this conversation where I feel like 0:12:22.920 --> 0:12:25.000 we haven't had this on the podcast, and I want 0:12:25.040 --> 0:12:28.440 to unpack this a little bit today of realizing that 0:12:28.559 --> 0:12:34.040 you also have a responsibility of if you're getting if 0:12:34.080 --> 0:12:37.240 you're feeling the feelings of shame because you feel too much, 0:12:37.880 --> 0:12:41.000 or guilt because you feel too much in whatever angle, 0:12:41.160 --> 0:12:45.600 or getting the feelings of your upset that someone called 0:12:45.640 --> 0:12:49.440 you too much, of taking some responsibility in regards to 0:12:50.240 --> 0:12:53.080 not letting outside opinions sway you. 0:12:53.880 --> 0:12:55.800 Yes, so true, don't you think? 0:12:55.960 --> 0:12:58.560 It's kind of a two part And I think sometimes 0:12:58.679 --> 0:13:02.600 usually the conversation, especially I've been guilty of this of 0:13:02.800 --> 0:13:06.120 like we're like, oh, well, the other person's just they 0:13:06.160 --> 0:13:09.720 can't handle you know, even the quotes of like you know, 0:13:09.920 --> 0:13:12.040 if you think I'm too much, you don't get me 0:13:12.080 --> 0:13:17.800 at my or if you can't handle me at my worst, 0:13:17.840 --> 0:13:19.120 you don't deserve me at my bed. 0:13:19.240 --> 0:13:19.440 Yeah. 0:13:20.080 --> 0:13:22.480 But the other one I was thinking of where it was. 0:13:22.559 --> 0:13:26.000 I saw it on TikTok and it was if you 0:13:26.040 --> 0:13:29.520 say I'm too much, go and find less. Yes, yes, 0:13:29.640 --> 0:13:32.240 like I think, like like I like, I do agree 0:13:32.240 --> 0:13:34.720 with it, but it's like also, I think a big 0:13:34.720 --> 0:13:37.719 part of self development too is realizing where the other 0:13:37.800 --> 0:13:41.600 person has responsibility. But also we're realizing you can have 0:13:41.679 --> 0:13:44.920 responsibility and clean some stuff up. Because, for example, if 0:13:44.920 --> 0:13:47.640 you clicked into this episode that I'm you know, a 0:13:47.720 --> 0:13:50.040 tea is probably gonna call it something about being too much. 0:13:50.559 --> 0:13:54.680 It's because that provokes you, It upsets you, it triggers you. 0:13:55.760 --> 0:13:59.280 So you need to look into that trigger. Because truly, 0:13:59.800 --> 0:14:02.000 if if you were so clear on who you are, 0:14:02.640 --> 0:14:04.200 and you were so clear on like who you are 0:14:04.200 --> 0:14:06.199 at your heart and what you bring to the table, 0:14:06.720 --> 0:14:09.600 and that wasn't rocked, you wouldn't even be. 0:14:09.679 --> 0:14:10.440 Worried about this. 0:14:11.040 --> 0:14:13.120 Yeah, you wouldn't be clicking into an episode like this 0:14:13.160 --> 0:14:14.560 because you're like, I don't give a fuck. 0:14:14.880 --> 0:14:16.920 Yeah, So that's why I just I. 0:14:16.880 --> 0:14:18.600 Think we need to speak on kind of the both 0:14:18.679 --> 0:14:23.640 sides of like, you know, taking responsibility for yourself and 0:14:23.680 --> 0:14:27.720 then also realizing how much this is a representation of 0:14:27.760 --> 0:14:30.640 what the other person is going through. Yeah, so true. 0:14:30.800 --> 0:14:33.880 I actually have a cool quote that I wrote when 0:14:33.920 --> 0:14:34.960 I was getting my brows done. 0:14:34.960 --> 0:14:35.800 Oh my gosh, I loved that. 0:14:35.960 --> 0:14:37.320 I was not that I wrote, but it's like I 0:14:37.360 --> 0:14:38.840 had this thought on my head and I was like, 0:14:38.880 --> 0:14:40.680 I've got to write this down before I forget. So 0:14:40.800 --> 0:14:42.640 what I want to bring to this episode is like 0:14:42.760 --> 0:14:50.960 realizing that it doesn't matter externally what is seen, but 0:14:51.200 --> 0:14:54.680 it matters internally how you feel. 0:14:56.880 --> 0:14:59.240 Let that simmer, Let that sink in. 0:14:59.440 --> 0:15:03.840 So, for example, if someone telling you you're too much 0:15:04.800 --> 0:15:11.960 upsets you, dysregulates you, triggers you. It's because your identity 0:15:12.040 --> 0:15:17.680 of yourself you half believe them. Otherwise, why would it 0:15:17.760 --> 0:15:18.120 upset you? 0:15:18.240 --> 0:15:20.720 Usually because you know who you are. Yeah, so that's 0:15:20.760 --> 0:15:21.280 what I'm saying. 0:15:21.320 --> 0:15:23.680 I think there's two parts to this conversation, which is 0:15:23.800 --> 0:15:27.640 really cool because it's not just people like, of course 0:15:27.680 --> 0:15:30.200 there are just like jerks out there, there's people who 0:15:30.200 --> 0:15:33.600 are just like they're just their asshole, stupid assets. But 0:15:33.720 --> 0:15:38.160 also realizing when you know people are adding you and 0:15:38.200 --> 0:15:42.920 it's triggering you of like, oh, whereas actually my identity 0:15:42.960 --> 0:15:45.760 of self not solid here, I have a question. 0:15:46.360 --> 0:15:46.800 Talk to me. 0:15:47.040 --> 0:15:49.560 Do you feel like you've worked through the too much wound? 0:15:50.520 --> 0:15:51.720 I do? Yeah. 0:15:52.160 --> 0:15:54.160 I feel like I wasn't like really bad for you 0:15:54.200 --> 0:15:58.280 at any point huge in my early twenties, and I 0:15:58.360 --> 0:16:01.640 it was a I'm too much, I need to conform 0:16:02.280 --> 0:16:04.720 or I'm too much. Let me have a song and 0:16:04.800 --> 0:16:07.600 dance about it, like let me fucking tell you how 0:16:07.680 --> 0:16:11.640 you thinking I'm too much is all about you, and 0:16:11.680 --> 0:16:14.600 like let's make it dramatic. Oh my god, because truly 0:16:14.600 --> 0:16:17.080 it triggered me. Yeah, and I think like I think 0:16:17.080 --> 0:16:19.000 that's also fine. I think it's so normal. 0:16:19.080 --> 0:16:20.040 We're all on our journey. 0:16:20.440 --> 0:16:24.400 But that's I do feel like I have kind of 0:16:24.440 --> 0:16:28.000 transcended this wound, and that's kind of what I want 0:16:28.040 --> 0:16:31.360 to bring into it. If it does trigger you, I 0:16:31.400 --> 0:16:34.800 think you need to do some identity work around how 0:16:34.920 --> 0:16:40.600 you see yourself and getting solid in how you see yourself. Yeah, 0:16:40.640 --> 0:16:43.960 and I think the biggest part here is realizing that 0:16:44.640 --> 0:16:48.720 you know someone's too much is another person's Holy shit, 0:16:48.840 --> 0:16:53.120 she's magnetic, you know, Like so many people would see 0:16:53.280 --> 0:16:57.520 my content and think, fuck, she is way too much, 0:16:58.000 --> 0:17:00.520 and then the exact same piece of content someone else 0:17:00.640 --> 0:17:02.560 is like, fuck, she's inspiring. 0:17:02.800 --> 0:17:04.000 She just expanded me. 0:17:05.520 --> 0:17:08.160 So do you see how like I can be Like 0:17:08.280 --> 0:17:11.240 if someone thinks I'm too much, or I'm too emotional, 0:17:11.280 --> 0:17:15.080 I'm too dramatic, or a big thing I'm actually. 0:17:15.040 --> 0:17:17.480 Leaning into right now, I can be why I am. 0:17:17.520 --> 0:17:20.760 I'm so direct, and I think some people can really 0:17:20.800 --> 0:17:24.440 see that as I'm not a heartfelt person, or I'm 0:17:24.440 --> 0:17:27.240 not a caring person, or I'm a mean person or whatever, 0:17:27.680 --> 0:17:31.600 And sometimes that can upset me or just regulate me 0:17:31.720 --> 0:17:35.639 because I am like, oh, but I am a caring person. 0:17:35.800 --> 0:17:38.640 Yeah, like that's something I haven't fully like worked. 0:17:38.320 --> 0:17:40.720 Through and I can fully see that, but it's like 0:17:40.880 --> 0:17:45.560 just kind of figuring out where you feel solid in 0:17:45.640 --> 0:17:48.800 who you are and where it's like, oh, I actually 0:17:48.880 --> 0:17:51.440 i'd want to feel solid in this aspect because I 0:17:51.520 --> 0:17:53.560 truly love how direct I am. 0:17:53.880 --> 0:17:56.000 Yeah, because that's how I get points across. 0:17:56.119 --> 0:17:58.720 That's how i am quickly, easily and quickly. 0:17:58.400 --> 0:17:59.520 Because I've got no time. 0:18:00.680 --> 0:18:03.560 And also that's what I love. And if someone's talking 0:18:03.560 --> 0:18:06.439 to me and they've just taken fucking twenty minutes to 0:18:06.520 --> 0:18:09.159 get to one point, I'm like, dude, I don't have 0:18:09.240 --> 0:18:11.880 dime in this. And also like stop with the context, 0:18:11.880 --> 0:18:14.960 stop with like the fluff. Yeah, tell me exactly how 0:18:14.960 --> 0:18:18.760 you feel, tell me your deepest, darkest secrets right now. 0:18:18.640 --> 0:18:19.720 And let's just go straight in. 0:18:20.760 --> 0:18:23.080 Do you mean like that's my vibe? Yeah, So that's 0:18:23.080 --> 0:18:24.120 the vibe I give out. 0:18:24.240 --> 0:18:24.440 Yeah. 0:18:24.480 --> 0:18:27.040 Because also I'm trying to attract people. Yeah, like that, 0:18:27.760 --> 0:18:30.479 So that's why I'm like, you know, you can battle 0:18:30.480 --> 0:18:32.960 with those sorts of things. So I think a big 0:18:33.000 --> 0:18:35.959 thing of like if you're told you're too much, and 0:18:36.400 --> 0:18:39.600 it does just regulate you a little bit of being like, oh, 0:18:40.000 --> 0:18:43.240 that's so interesting because I I, you know, my concept 0:18:43.320 --> 0:18:46.399 of self is I'm a confident person. But am I 0:18:46.440 --> 0:18:50.600 actually that confident if that comment upsets me? So true? 0:18:50.680 --> 0:18:53.879 And then figuring out and it's all about reframing, so 0:18:54.040 --> 0:18:57.119 first of all, you know, like going straight into it 0:18:57.160 --> 0:18:59.640 of like not going into shame and guilt that that's 0:18:59.640 --> 0:19:04.240 still upset you or you know, I think also like 0:19:04.280 --> 0:19:07.040 I'm just gonna randomly bring this in. A big thing 0:19:07.119 --> 0:19:12.320 that has helped me is like just not taking things personally. Yeah, 0:19:12.840 --> 0:19:16.000 how much does like one comment and you just fucking 0:19:16.040 --> 0:19:18.760 take it to heart and it's like the only thing 0:19:18.800 --> 0:19:21.560 you think of for years, for years, it can be 0:19:21.680 --> 0:19:24.440 for years, and it's like some on set of fleeting comment, 0:19:24.520 --> 0:19:26.119 like the amount of shit that comes out of my 0:19:26.240 --> 0:19:31.120 mouth that probably is just like me talking shit, And it's. 0:19:30.760 --> 0:19:32.800 Not in a like no, I know what you mean. 0:19:32.840 --> 0:19:34.960 It's like I would never want someone told onto that 0:19:35.040 --> 0:19:38.280 hold onto something. And I think that's also a big 0:19:38.320 --> 0:19:40.480 thing too, is like stepping back a little bit and 0:19:40.480 --> 0:19:43.280 being like, oh am I taking this too personally because 0:19:43.320 --> 0:19:48.720 also like how are you gonna get through life? Hard? 0:19:49.760 --> 0:19:51.119 And like I want to live in the vibe of 0:19:51.160 --> 0:19:52.080 life happens for me. 0:19:52.600 --> 0:19:54.639 So it's like, oh, nah, I'm just not gonna take 0:19:54.680 --> 0:19:57.240 that personally because also I know it's such a reflection 0:19:57.320 --> 0:20:00.320 of what that person is going through and they're level 0:20:00.400 --> 0:20:04.240 of emotional intelligence and their level of their self development. 0:20:04.440 --> 0:20:06.399 So true. So I'm like, oh, just not, I'm not 0:20:06.520 --> 0:20:10.760 here for this conversation. Yeah. I had to work through 0:20:10.800 --> 0:20:15.360 the wound quite young. Yeah, from like literally as long 0:20:15.400 --> 0:20:21.520 as I can remember, all through school, my friends, teachers, family, everyone. 0:20:21.600 --> 0:20:24.280 Oh she talks so much. Oh she's so intense. Oh 0:20:24.359 --> 0:20:27.560 she's so dramatic. And then into high school a lot 0:20:27.720 --> 0:20:32.160 like often it was like intense, intimidating, just like non 0:20:32.240 --> 0:20:35.280 stop talking, Like if I try to talk to someone 0:20:35.280 --> 0:20:38.480 about a topic, I'm passionate about it, just like my 0:20:38.560 --> 0:20:42.720 speech never ends. Yeah, and and you know what, it's sorry, 0:20:42.800 --> 0:20:46.560 just quickly interect here. Oh she's so political, Like she's 0:20:46.600 --> 0:20:50.320 so opinionated. I always got the opinionating. Oh yeah, I 0:20:50.359 --> 0:20:51.480 was like, what would you rather me. 0:20:51.480 --> 0:20:56.919 Not have opinion? Would you rather me not speak? Because 0:20:56.960 --> 0:21:00.000 that's kind of where you're leading with it, literally. 0:21:00.400 --> 0:21:02.760 And that's what I got told. And even when it 0:21:02.800 --> 0:21:05.119 came to things like I think it must have been 0:21:05.119 --> 0:21:07.560 like fifteen, But this was a comment that I really 0:21:07.600 --> 0:21:09.479 had to work through, which is why I still remember. 0:21:09.520 --> 0:21:12.119 It was when my friends are talking about boys and 0:21:12.160 --> 0:21:13.480 all that sort of stuff, and I was like, oh, like, 0:21:13.520 --> 0:21:16.879 I've never had a boyfriend. And then someone made a 0:21:16.920 --> 0:21:20.119 comment about me being a bit of a handful, and 0:21:20.160 --> 0:21:23.320 then someone else was like, oh, just one, and I 0:21:23.400 --> 0:21:26.160 was like oh, and I'm like, but you know what 0:21:26.359 --> 0:21:29.960 that's like, as in, like I'm a lot to handle. Yeah, 0:21:30.000 --> 0:21:33.280 Like I get it, and then someone okay, yeah. 0:21:32.720 --> 0:21:34.040