Speaker 1: I'm surprised you haven't said anything about the new piece
Speaker 1: of equipment behind me.
Speaker 2: The green bin. Have another look, you're an electric mower.
Speaker 2: I even see it. Yeah, let me stand up.
Speaker 1: That's eighteen vaults of pure power right there.
Speaker 2: I'm proud of you.
Speaker 1: You like that.
Speaker 2: That's amazing. You're so progressive. I've noticed as well that
Speaker 2: the grass is not mode.
Speaker 1: Welcome back to episode two two Doting Dads. My name
Speaker 1: is Matty Jay. I'm ass we've come back for round two.
Speaker 2: We're umming and ring about it, and then we knew
Speaker 2: will come back. In the last episode you said, we
Speaker 2: don't know if there by the end of the episode
Speaker 2: you'd committed as doing this every week. Just like that,
Speaker 2: we did.
Speaker 1: Have like a few week plan in place. There's always
Speaker 1: going to be around two. But you know, you've got
Speaker 1: to just have an air of mystery. You've got to
Speaker 1: keep people wanting more. And if we said, hey, this
Speaker 1: is going to be eight episodes, people be like, oh,
Speaker 1: listen to the next one.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and then we'd count down the eight episodes. Oh
Speaker 2: my god, I've got like six more to do after
Speaker 2: this one.
Speaker 1: It is nice to see, though, there's a lot of
Speaker 1: wives I'm assuming, Oh, girlfriends who are tagging their partners
Speaker 1: or tagging the husband's saying you might like this one. Yeah.
Speaker 2: I think they're doing that to be like, you might
Speaker 2: get some advice on how to parent. No, you will not,
Speaker 2: you will not. You might find a little bit of
Speaker 2: relatability in it and be like, oh fuck, I got
Speaker 2: shot on this week too.
Speaker 1: Yeah. I think if there is a dad right now listening, going,
Speaker 1: I haven't read the books, I don't know what I'm doing.
Speaker 1: I've not invested any energy whatsoever into like learning how
Speaker 1: to be your dad, and they've come here.
Speaker 2: Fuck, God help you, yeah.
Speaker 1: God help you.
Speaker 2: There's nothing like the reality just set in that there's
Speaker 2: no actual advice in this conversation. I don't even know
Speaker 2: where my kids are right now. They've been safely looked
Speaker 2: after by a professional. That's a lie where they get fed,
Speaker 2: probably a love I get the thing on the story
Speaker 2: app what they've eaten, and it's like, okay, so they
Speaker 2: have chicken and rice for lunch ate all. First of all, bullshit.
Speaker 2: That is the biggest load of shit ever. There's no
Speaker 2: way my kid's eating a full meal. I suppose they're
Speaker 2: starving them up to that point. At my house, they
Speaker 2: know with the snacks.
Speaker 1: Do you know what they always say, because I have
Speaker 1: questioned it. I've come in and I'm like, hey, I've
Speaker 1: just Marley's a really bad eater. Did she actually eat
Speaker 1: all her food?
Speaker 2: And they go, oh yeah, They're like, what did the
Speaker 2: app say?
Speaker 1: Ate at all? And then they always say when they're
Speaker 1: in the environment where all the kids are eating, they
Speaker 1: like to follow each other, and we find that, you know,
Speaker 1: the kids are a lot more engaged in like the
Speaker 1: food as opposed to when they're at home by themselves.
Speaker 2: Watching TV in front of a tvat that.
Speaker 1: Makes a lot of sense, it does, but I'm still
Speaker 1: calling bullshit.
Speaker 2: It's bullshit. There's no way my kids eating chicken and
Speaker 2: rice and all his vegetables just because the other kids
Speaker 2: are doing it. And the good thing about it is,
Speaker 2: though we look at it and go, okay, ate all
Speaker 2: So okay, I had a good nutritious meal today. What's
Speaker 2: for dinner? Toast? If we get like, oh, like they
Speaker 2: didn't they ate some of or they grazed at it
Speaker 2: or whatever, which is really the case, Like I got
Speaker 2: to cook him something tonight.
Speaker 1: We started off with like jam on toast.
Speaker 2: I actually got here and there was a piece of
Speaker 2: jam toast on the back. I considered eating it. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I was going to offer it to how desperate I
Speaker 2: am for leftovers.
Speaker 1: But now she's just gone like, that's Lola's Lola's jam
Speaker 1: on toast. Marley's just like a thick layer of butter
Speaker 1: on the toast, nothing else.
Speaker 2: M buttery goodness. Yeah, it's not bad. She's really lining
Speaker 2: those arteries. Are you on full butter or margarine?
Speaker 1: I'm on the full butter.
Speaker 2: We're on the nutles. Okay. Look, there's a reason why
Speaker 2: when Oscar was breastfeeding, April couldn't eat Deiry because obviously
Speaker 2: through the breast milk, yes, he would be very uncomfortable.
Speaker 2: So we had to get rid of all the dairy
Speaker 2: in the house and just never went back on that
Speaker 2: one thing.
Speaker 1: Easy, lactose and tolerate.
Speaker 2: I don't know, it's fine. Now, it's fine.
Speaker 1: You've just stayed on the nutlegs.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't know. We just never went back. We
Speaker 2: have milk, regular milk in the house. No one really
Speaker 2: drinks except for Macy like Oscoar have a bit here
Speaker 2: on the air. But like with the nutlegs, we just
Speaker 2: never went back. I don't know. It was kind of like,
Speaker 2: we're so loyal. They don't sponsor the show. Maybe they
Speaker 2: will yet, just straight nutlegs next to fake a buttery goodness,
Speaker 2: but you look at nutritional value on it and it's
Speaker 2: no better than butter.
Speaker 1: Does it have like a health star rating?
Speaker 2: What's the I can't remember.
Speaker 1: It can't be high, it must be can't be high one?
Speaker 2: No, no, I reckon it's probably I'll give benefit of
Speaker 2: the doubt, give it two and a half.
Speaker 1: Do you know what surprised me about honey star rating?
Speaker 1: What do you think it is?
Speaker 2: It's low? Yeah, yeah, yeah, it sugar, but it's natural
Speaker 2: sugar allegedly, like how many bees are fucking together? How
Speaker 2: they do it? They fucking get honey or not? I
Speaker 2: don't know. They polling out, they rub their hands together
Speaker 2: and they get honey.
Speaker 1: I don't think honey is the byproduct of bees having sex.
Speaker 2: I thought it was like beechis. So they call the
Speaker 2: conversation with your kid the birds and the bees. So
Speaker 2: there's got to be some sort of truth behind what
Speaker 2: I'm saying. Look, sex is pretty sweet anyways, though we
Speaker 2: went real off on honey there, but yeah, Look, when
Speaker 2: I go for a run, I squirt a bit of
Speaker 2: honey in my mouth and go for a run. So
Speaker 2: it's kind of like giving me. Yeah, just like a
Speaker 2: little bit of energy. Kick a bit of bee semen,
Speaker 2: and you're good to get a bee seeming I can
Speaker 2: run all day.
Speaker 1: Question for you, Ashton, Question for you.
Speaker 2: U's my full name? Okay, mum, this is getting serious.
Speaker 1: How many times do you think I was at the
Speaker 1: hospital the emergency room over the weekend?
Speaker 2: Once is more than a half. You're there more than once.
Speaker 2: More than once I noticed that your kids are here.
Speaker 2: There's no sign of children. What happened? I was there
Speaker 2: twice twice in one weekend, in a forty eight.
Speaker 1: Hour two separate incidents, two separate hospitals, the same hospital,
Speaker 1: two separate kids. The weekend just gone. Was probably one
Speaker 1: of the hardest.
Speaker 2: That we've had just as a parent in general.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it was just you know, sometimes you're winning, sometimes
Speaker 1: you're losing. You know, sometimes you're swimming up the stream.
Speaker 1: Sometimes it's downstream.
Speaker 2: Yeah, mainly upstream though.
Speaker 1: This was all upstream into the rapids. So Friday, Friday morning,
Speaker 1: my did a WII and as she was doing a
Speaker 1: wee she was like, oh, to Laura's like, it really stings.
Speaker 1: And I was like, oh, that's not good. And Laura said,
Speaker 1: could be a uti and I was like uti, like
Speaker 1: where's she been? Four? And sometimes I don't know. You know,
Speaker 1: sometimes kids just when they do something, they're like, oh
Speaker 1: that really hurt or like oh, my stomach aches, and
Speaker 1: you're like.
Speaker 2: It's just a new feeling to them because they don't know,
Speaker 2: like I don't know what's going on.
Speaker 1: Definitely going to drop her at daycare and just.
Speaker 2: Like wait to see what happens.
Speaker 1: Yeah, two hours later, dayk calls me up and says, hey,
Speaker 1: Marley's got a really big fee, but it's now like
Speaker 1: thirty nine.
Speaker 2: You have to now pick her up because it's meant
Speaker 2: to be thirty seven, right, so anything over that, you're like,
Speaker 2: but then thirty nine and that's a decent jump.
Speaker 1: So they said we'll give some panodole. But then at
Speaker 1: this point you have to come collect, which is devastating
Speaker 1: because if anyone who doesn't have kids is listening, you
Speaker 1: still pay the full fee, paying the full whack for
Speaker 1: a day of daycare, even though she's been there for
Speaker 1: two hours.
Speaker 2: You're paying someone else and you've got to do the
Speaker 2: parenting from here on out.
Speaker 1: It's heartbreaking, especially when you're looking at like the rest
Speaker 1: of the day child free. I plan to do so
Speaker 1: much work.
Speaker 2: It doesn't matter that they're sick and there in pain
Speaker 2: or anything. Male he's like, help, and I'm like, I've
Speaker 2: got a uti.
Speaker 1: Yeah, picked her up, go home, gave her some damadole?
Speaker 1: Worked well? Wake up? Some what some damadol?
Speaker 2: I thought you'd be on the good stuff.
Speaker 1: What's the good stuff?
Speaker 2: Isn't it just panadole?
Speaker 1: Is that better? Is dambodol? Am? I?
Speaker 2: I don't know? Is that like just it just sounds
Speaker 2: like something you from the sheep? They were there, like
Speaker 2: do you want the generic brand? You're like, give us that.
Speaker 1: I though damadol was like the top or maybe I
Speaker 1: don't know, I could be so who knows.
Speaker 2: Maybe I get my wife on the blow. She wouldn't know,
Speaker 2: you know, the exact milliage? What's her weight?
Speaker 1: What does she wait, she's taken five mil?
Speaker 2: Yeah, she's four.
Speaker 1: I I know that much. Now that much. But the
Speaker 1: issue is you can only give it to them four
Speaker 1: times in twenty four hours, and then.
Speaker 2: That's what the bottle says. We maperiment a little bit.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's fine, Yeah, yeah, wake up. On Saturday morning,
Speaker 1: temperature was peaking. Still what height did it get to?
Speaker 1: So in the afternoon on Saturday, we're sitting at forty.
Speaker 2: Holy shit, I know she's sick man. Yeah, okay, yeah, and.
Speaker 1: So at this point we're like, we can't give it
Speaker 1: any more, damadol.
Speaker 2: What's your choice of thermometer? Rectal? Don't tell me is rectal?
Speaker 1: Actually? Do you know what we used to give though
Speaker 1: when they were newborns. Instead of giving them the liquid,
Speaker 1: we would give them some positories up the bum and
Speaker 1: hear me out. You know, it's so hard to give
Speaker 1: a newborn Oh it's like this, yeah, and to get
Speaker 1: them to swallow it, oh.
Speaker 2: Yeah, because youve got to, like you do a little
Speaker 2: blowing on the face.
Speaker 1: Just suppository. Suppository is weird obviously because you're like putting
Speaker 1: a pill up the back.
Speaker 2: Is it like a special insert? Yeah, I'm learning so
Speaker 2: much today, like a.
Speaker 1: Little rapper that you like peel up.
Speaker 2: So it's got like, this is fucking wild.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Someone said to me.
Speaker 2: You know how, we said that this is not educational.
Speaker 2: We lied, We fucking lie. We've wrote you in. Now
Speaker 2: you're gonna hear us preach about suppositories.
Speaker 1: I will tell anyone who listens suppositories until they're like
Speaker 1: one or one and a half.
Speaker 2: Wow.
Speaker 1: But now the moment wise, it's just under the arm. Okay,
Speaker 1: yeah ideal. So Anymi is peaking and we're like, you know.
Speaker 2: She's just peaking. I love that big night out. She's
Speaker 2: paking on the cat Fred again on just.
Speaker 1: Go Jeller and you're like, do I go to hospital?
Speaker 2: Is the fucking worst too? They're like, she just want
Speaker 2: to go home.
Speaker 1: The biggest question is you don't want to rock up
Speaker 1: and then they look at you and go, fucking really,
Speaker 1: we're here to save the lives.
Speaker 2: Of kids just because you're a useless parent.
Speaker 1: So you don't want to have that guilt. But the
Speaker 1: best advice that we got from a nurse was we
Speaker 1: would rather have you come and then just tell you
Speaker 1: that it's nothing, don't worry about it, as opposed to
Speaker 1: you coming and them saying we wish you were here.
Speaker 2: Like yeah, one hundred percent. Like I think if anyone's
Speaker 2: listening and it's like the option to take your kid
Speaker 2: to a hospital or not, yeah take it, just go,
Speaker 2: just go. If you're unsure. Then the answer is yes,
Speaker 2: first hold me to that, though, just to be clear,
Speaker 2: don't hold me to that.
Speaker 1: But because she was at forty, which is very hard,
Speaker 1: we thought, hey, we'll give it one more little dose
Speaker 1: of damadol. And then as we're driving to the hospital,
Speaker 1: Marley's like, dude, do like, hey, dad, put on some
Speaker 1: of like that Disney song and just like, where are
Speaker 1: we off to you guys? And she's kind of turned
Speaker 1: a corner.
Speaker 2: Fucking dare she My adult's kicking in.
Speaker 1: But you know, I'm not going to ignore the fact
Speaker 1: that she's had a temperature for the last yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: twenty four hours. Laura and I are like who has
Speaker 1: to go in? Who's going to drive home with Lola?
Speaker 1: And who's going to take Marley? And Laura drew the
Speaker 1: short straw, so she's gone into hospital and Marley's just
Speaker 1: like running on the chairs.
Speaker 2: Like having a good old.
Speaker 1: Time, and Laura's like, she is so unwell, like she's
Speaker 1: been so sick. And they look behind Laura and Marley's
Speaker 1: ed just like running around doing cartwheels. In the hospital
Speaker 1: ended up seeing a MUTI give us an antibiotics and
Speaker 1: she's fine.
Speaker 2: Okay, that's the first trip to the hospital. That's number one,
Speaker 2: pretty smooth. How long was she at the hospital for.
Speaker 1: It was a good five hours still lot. Yeah, So
Speaker 1: Laura got home at like, fuck, that's a long time,
Speaker 1: nine point thirty maybe nine o'clock. Because it's not life threatening,
Speaker 1: you go wait, you turn the next morning. After spending
Speaker 1: all those Saturday locked indoors, wake up on Sunday morning
Speaker 1: and we thought, it's a beautiful day, go to the park.
Speaker 1: We'll like enjoy the outdoors. I hear this scream come
Speaker 1: from the living room and Marley has these microphones here. Oh,
Speaker 1: it was in the desk. I don't know if I
Speaker 1: put the mic there or maybe.
Speaker 2: Laura put did you play the blame game?
Speaker 1: It was me And Marley has pulled the cord and
Speaker 1: these way like fire.
Speaker 2: I picked it up before heavy. It's a dumbell.
Speaker 1: So she pulled it and pulled it onto herself and
Speaker 1: it's come down and smashed her right on the tip
Speaker 1: of the toe. Run in there and I look at
Speaker 1: her foot and she's taken all the skin off her toes.
Speaker 2: And taking any nails off, not yet, not that nail.
Speaker 2: That's the thing with the nail, It comes off down
Speaker 2: the track, so it's like it hurts now, and then
Speaker 2: the nail comes off down and it hurts again. It's relentless.
Speaker 1: It's the worst. It's the worst. And I look down
Speaker 1: and it looks mangled. And then if a kid looks
Speaker 1: at the cart nessye blood, they sup freaking out. And
Speaker 1: my initial reaction was like, why did you do that? Yeah,
Speaker 1: and then at the same time that I'm and then
Speaker 1: she's just in agony.
Speaker 2: It's been so much pain. Get yourself to the hospital.
Speaker 1: Yeah, there's your bag. And then Laura's like, well, we'll
Speaker 1: have to go back to the hospital.
Speaker 2: Packed the bag.
Speaker 1: Luckily it was still pretty much had everything in it
Speaker 1: from when.
Speaker 2: We got back from the hospital. Yeah, she's in the
Speaker 2: Wars this weekend.
Speaker 1: So like we drive there literally they're like, hey, You're like, no,
Speaker 1: it's and I was positive it was going to be broken.
Speaker 1: Didn't break it. But also being a Sunday footy's back. Yeah,
Speaker 1: Like the place Laura said it was.
Speaker 2: Just heaving broken bone full of kids.
Speaker 1: In like rugby jerseys and dislocated arms and broken legs
Speaker 1: and it was like a war zone in there.
Speaker 2: Oh bet that sucks. How long were you there for
Speaker 2: all this? Time, Well, Laura, you just sucking sent her again.
Speaker 1: I don't know hand on Hart. I'm yet to do
Speaker 1: the hospital trip myself.
Speaker 2: It's brutal, man, I've only ever.
Speaker 1: Just dropped off.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's brew like we've been, not with Macy other
Speaker 2: than when she's born, obviously, but Oscar twice, both fire ambulance. Yeah,
Speaker 2: holy shit, not that the ambulance was required. So the
Speaker 2: first time, yes, So first time, he was about five
Speaker 2: months old. He stopped breathing in the middle of the
Speaker 2: night and he had like silent reflux. So he's I'm
Speaker 2: at one end of the house over to the other
Speaker 2: end of the house. The scream was very different. I'm
Speaker 2: half cut, like six beers deep watching the footing, and
Speaker 2: we both ran up to the bedroom and like he
Speaker 2: was noticeably choking, and I've whipped the light on, got
Speaker 2: him out, and it's mentally scarred in my mind of
Speaker 2: this child, purple eyes bulging out of his head. I
Speaker 2: didn't think I was gonna tell this story today, but
Speaker 2: I'm gonna. And I'm like, holy shit, like and April's
Speaker 2: on the phone, dribble zero and I'm ripping him out
Speaker 2: of his sleep suit and they're like don't hit him
Speaker 2: on the back. I'm like, too fucking late, because they're
Speaker 2: worried that the adrenaline pumping through you, you're going to
Speaker 2: knock the shit out of him. The ambulance was literally
Speaker 2: out the front in two minutes. They were going down
Speaker 2: the street and they've come up and he's sort of
Speaker 2: like still struggling a little bit to breathe, but he
Speaker 2: was breathing and he was returning to color by the
Speaker 2: time we got him into the ambulance and I'm sitting
Speaker 2: on my lap. You now ambulance lights alike, it's so bright.
Speaker 2: He was completely fine. He was like, this is sick, Like,
Speaker 2: this is amazing, and to the hospital. I'm up there
Speaker 2: for six hours. So what's happened is he's had some
Speaker 2: reflux in Mila night and it's hurt him. So he's
Speaker 2: got he's gone back down his windpipe and got start.
Speaker 1: So was it pat on the back that kicked him
Speaker 1: into breathing again.
Speaker 2: Yeah, essentially. By the time I got to him and
Speaker 2: got him up and got him, he was sort of
Speaker 2: I think getting him at an upright position was better
Speaker 2: than him laying down anyway. So I had to go
Speaker 2: to the hospital spent like six hours in the hospital
Speaker 2: with him. He was perfectly fine. So that was one time.
Speaker 2: Holy shit, at the time, it was really traumatic. I
Speaker 2: look back on it now and it's like four, Like
Speaker 2: I can't imagine how many people go through a similar thing.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but also like fuck just to hug him afterwards,
Speaker 1: knowing that he's fine like that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Yeah, it was huge. And the second time was
Speaker 2: he had this cough and anyone who's listening to their
Speaker 2: kids had creep. It's a very unique cough. We didn't know,
Speaker 2: like I didn't. We've never had that problem before.
Speaker 1: And do you want to give us a little taste
Speaker 1: to what that's a seal?
Speaker 2: It's got a seal in the other room, and like
Speaker 2: it progressively got worse and worse, and then like I
Speaker 2: was like, fuck, it's like eleven o'clock at night, and
Speaker 2: I remember I walked in there and he couldn't breathe
Speaker 2: because what it does it swells the airway. That's why
Speaker 2: they say, like a steaming hot shower can like open
Speaker 2: up your sinuses, open up your airway. But yeah, he
Speaker 2: physically was like struggling to breathe in and it was
Speaker 2: freaked out on the phone of the ambulance as you
Speaker 2: would be. They were there in like four or five minutes,
Speaker 2: two ambulances. The whole buildings lit up like you got
Speaker 2: the double, got the double, and look it was scary again.
Speaker 1: Why would they send two just like who's got it
Speaker 1: than one? Or was one? Like? Did one to have more?
Speaker 2: I think I don't know. I can't real yeah, but
Speaker 2: I think they wanted to get the first one there
Speaker 2: to figure out what's going on. And once they got
Speaker 2: there and realized that this is croup, this is what happens,
Speaker 2: because it's like you could fucking die, Like it closed
Speaker 2: his airway to a point where he was like like
Speaker 2: and I was like, holy shit. So here's the thing, Right,
Speaker 2: we get out to the ambulance and he's sort of
Speaker 2: come to a little bit seen all the flashy lights
Speaker 2: and that's amazing. They give him a steroid injection essentially.
Speaker 2: That's how they get it too, because you can't take
Speaker 2: medication or anything like, it just doesn't work. You had
Speaker 2: to wait like four hours for him to you know,
Speaker 2: So I'm going to entertain this kid in the middle
Speaker 2: of the night. I was in the hospital about four am.
Speaker 2: So for the week after he was like just crazy,
Speaker 2: like crazy. And I ran into friends of ours who
Speaker 2: their kids have suffered a group a lot, and they're like,
Speaker 2: did you get the steroid stuff? I'm like yeah, It's
Speaker 2: like is he crazy? She's just roid raging for two weeks.
Speaker 2: He's roid raging through the house. Like I was like, fuck,
Speaker 2: what's the hell is wrong with his shaving? He's like
Speaker 2: Stewie Griffin when he starts lifting, like yeah, yeah, get
Speaker 2: us a bit of milk. It's pretty much what he
Speaker 2: was like. But he was mental for like two weeks.
Speaker 1: Get him on the footy field and I get out.
Speaker 2: Of there straight. I've got one of those big chin's already.
Speaker 2: But yeah, like he's had it since, but we've been
Speaker 2: able to like manage it because we know what to expect.
Speaker 2: So there would be heaps of parents now listening being like,
Speaker 2: my kid's never had croup ononder, what was that?
Speaker 1: That's like, that is like the scariest part of you.
Speaker 1: Hear these horror stories of like, hey, you know, child
Speaker 1: wasn't too bad, put him down to sleep, and then
Speaker 1: something happened. And so when when Marley had her fever,
Speaker 1: we put her into bed with us because we were
Speaker 1: just like she's you know, thirty nine. If something happens,
Speaker 1: we'd rather her like be run. Yeah, and I sleep
Speaker 1: pretty heavily. Pin drops.
Speaker 2: What's that like?
Speaker 1: I was there anything? So the kids will have to
Speaker 1: cry for a while before I'm up. But Laura, if
Speaker 1: anything happens, she's up.
Speaker 2: She is very much mum instinct too.
Speaker 1: Well apparently apparently. I wonder if I should google this
Speaker 1: Google after women give birth they release.
Speaker 2: This already thinking that they release a baby. That's what
Speaker 2: they do when they give birth.
Speaker 1: I was going to say a toxin, but.
Speaker 2: Yeah, look, I think you should start.
Speaker 1: They're actually half spider. Yeah, yeah, no, they release a
Speaker 1: chemical which let me, oh god, hang on, Okay, I
Speaker 1: can't find it. I can't. I've had a quick google,
Speaker 1: but there is literally I remember watching it on this documentary.
Speaker 1: It must be true that when women give birth they
Speaker 1: release this chemical, which means they do not enter the
Speaker 1: same level of deep sleep that they will get into
Speaker 1: pre kids.
Speaker 2: For how long?
Speaker 1: Forever?
Speaker 2: Forever, forever, so they're constantly on alert.
Speaker 1: Yeah anyway, but yeah, back to Marley's foot, wasn't broken.
Speaker 2: I didn't even think about that. I just thought about
Speaker 2: the skin coming up. Yeah, I know, nothing broke, bruised, bruised.
Speaker 1: She got it bandaged up. But then the annoying thing
Speaker 1: is for the rest of the day she was like
Speaker 1: I can't because she's quite traumatized and she saw she
Speaker 1: saw how cut it was. She was like, I can't walk,
Speaker 1: and I was like, no, you can. You can walk,
Speaker 1: just like put some weight on it.
Speaker 2: At this rate you're walking home.
Speaker 1: And she wouldn't, like, wouldn't even stand on it the
Speaker 1: rest of the Sunday on the couch to go to
Speaker 1: the bathroom because I was like, I'm not going to
Speaker 1: carry you like you can walk. She dragged herself like
Speaker 1: literally like you've been shot, Like she yet, like she
Speaker 1: no longer had any movement in her limbs, dragged herself
Speaker 1: to the bathroom. And I was like, I'm not going
Speaker 1: to help you. I know what you're doing. Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: you're fine.
Speaker 2: It's like I was going when he gets like the
Speaker 2: smallest booboos, I can't do that, and you're like do that, Yeah.
Speaker 1: You're fine. But also you're like, did they miss it
Speaker 1: on the X ray? Maybe it is broken, And she's
Speaker 1: just like and I'm like, you will walk on it,
Speaker 1: And she's got like a bone sticking out, please listen
Speaker 1: to me down Monday, dropped her a daycare and I
Speaker 1: was like, look, she's got one shoe on because she
Speaker 1: had an.
Speaker 2: Accident and we're away from the other kids.
Speaker 1: They were like, god, she's been in the walls. But
Speaker 1: I was like, she will walk. She's fine. But I
Speaker 1: picked her up on Monday and I said, did she
Speaker 1: walk on it? And they're like, she literally dragged herself.
Speaker 1: We would help her. Still wasn't walking on it. Only now,
Speaker 1: like days later. I think Laura had to bribe her
Speaker 1: with chocolate to make her stand. Like all good parents,
Speaker 1: we bribed our child with treats.
Speaker 2: Briberry is like the best parenting methods by threatening.
Speaker 1: It's the benchmark to how my parent. And she's only
Speaker 1: now starting to walk on it.
Speaker 2: So she's on the end.
Speaker 1: We've come out the other end. Foot's not broken.
Speaker 2: She's on the end of beautiful. Top weekend. Really, it's
Speaker 2: going to be like that's what you're saying, it's like
Speaker 2: the worst weekend, like has it like mentally trying to
Speaker 2: get through all.
Speaker 1: That last week. We said that we were going to
Speaker 1: put it out there, and people did have questions. We
Speaker 1: were going to be in a position to answer them.
Speaker 1: Not in a serious way, definitely not offering any serious
Speaker 1: advice here, but just if we can share any of
Speaker 1: our wisdom of being parents. I've been a dad now
Speaker 1: for almost four years. May a peppering of advice that
Speaker 1: I can offer people. But we're going to have a
Speaker 1: quick look at some of the questions that people have submitted,
Speaker 1: So we put the call out there. Lots of good questions.
Speaker 1: We only have time for three questions today. I believe, Ash,
Speaker 1: how are you for time? I'm good for three, I've
Speaker 1: gone through. These are other ones that I think are
Speaker 1: the best questions. We appreciate all the questions, always appreciate
Speaker 1: all the questions. We're a couple of crap ones.
Speaker 2: And then there's a couple of abusive ones.
Speaker 1: Yeah, can you guys shut the fuck up? And I'm
Speaker 1: like no. Question number one, Ash, how did you manage
Speaker 1: sleep in the first few months? Did you follow a program?
Speaker 2: Good question? So two kids. One kid was a terrible
Speaker 2: sleep and one was much better. The first kid brutal.
Speaker 2: I found like managing it you have to. I mean,
Speaker 2: there's always this thought in the back of your head
Speaker 2: when you have a kid that you need to get
Speaker 2: up when your wife gets up in the middle of
Speaker 2: the night as well, and it's like, you don't because
Speaker 2: then two of you are tired. Someone needs to be rested.
Speaker 2: You can do the stuff during the day or whatever
Speaker 2: when so she can rest. Also, some solid advice from
Speaker 2: me is, if you do get up in the middle
Speaker 2: of the night with each other, don't say a fucking word.
Speaker 2: If she asks you to get water, don't even say yes,
Speaker 2: just go and get it, because it's an instant argument.
Speaker 2: That was one thing someone said to me, and they
Speaker 2: were like, just don't talk.
Speaker 1: There is nothing more testing in those periods where you're
Speaker 1: both so sleep deprived. Oh and it doesn't matter who
Speaker 1: said what or in what tone, You're just gonna there's
Speaker 1: gonna be an argument. Yeah, it's just gonna happen. It
Speaker 1: doesn't matter how much you love each other. Yeah, and
Speaker 1: it doesn't matter who's right who's wrong.
Speaker 2: At that time of night, No one's right, no one's wrong.
Speaker 2: It's just like yeah, So like, yeah, I always say
Speaker 2: to my friends are having kids, I'm like, just don't
Speaker 2: say anything. You know, you could be so in love
Speaker 2: and you could be too nice as people on earth,
Speaker 2: but at that time of night. One slight tone change
Speaker 2: can do anything. So it's just not it's not worth it.
Speaker 1: So why wasn't I stro a good sleeper?
Speaker 2: He was just always like a cranky baby, silent reflux.
Speaker 1: Just like his father.
Speaker 2: I am a yeah, I am a cranky as hell,
Speaker 2: so cranky others all right, right now, I'm cranky. But yeah,
Speaker 2: he was like just uncomfortable. He slept forty minutes around
Speaker 2: the clock for the first like six months. It was brutal.
Speaker 1: And then Macy.
Speaker 2: Macy was a dream so I think we a lot,
Speaker 2: as you do, you learn a lot from the first one.
Speaker 2: But she was noticeably better. Is better in all like,
Speaker 2: he still wakes us.
Speaker 1: We had it the other way around where Mary dream child.
Speaker 1: She breastfed well, she slept well. Laura and I would
Speaker 1: look at each other and be.
Speaker 2: Like, ahre we you amazing at this?
Speaker 1: What are parents complaining about?
Speaker 2: Oh? Yes, is the breed You're going to trigger some
Speaker 2: people just saying oh I look.
Speaker 1: Back, and I'm like, you were so naive and had
Speaker 1: literally no idea. You just you get lucky and you
Speaker 1: get a good child.
Speaker 2: I always say, you get a sleeper or you don't.
Speaker 1: Yes, Because then Lola was the same as Oscar in
Speaker 1: that like, I think I look back and I've kind
Speaker 1: of eraised it from my memory. Like it's funny how
Speaker 1: all of those terrible times, like the lowest of the low,
Speaker 1: you just put that area. Yeah, you buried it into
Speaker 1: a deep dark section of your brain where you never
Speaker 1: revisit it until Laura will say, hey, do you remember
Speaker 1: that time when this happened? And I'm like, oh, yeah,
Speaker 1: that sucks. You always forget about the bad parts, otherwise
Speaker 1: you'd never have another kid. Laura would only sleep on
Speaker 1: Laura's chest and would only see maybe like forty minutes,
Speaker 1: same as Oscar at a time. I remember there were
Speaker 1: times when I was just like holding Lola at like
Speaker 1: three in the morning. She'd been fed, she'd been burbed,
Speaker 1: and she was just screaming, scream screaming.
Speaker 2: You're just existing, You're.
Speaker 1: Just in a place of such like frustration.
Speaker 2: And yeah, it's not you, it's not your real you.
Speaker 2: I'll talk about this with my therapist a lot. Yeah,
Speaker 2: it's not the real your. It's more like the situation
Speaker 2: and the days and days of lack of They used
Speaker 2: to use it as torture, right, keep people away. So
Speaker 2: I get it. I get it, and like those feelings
Speaker 2: they're not abnormal.
Speaker 1: But the good thing is it gets better.
Speaker 2: It does allegedly it does get better. And like, yeah,
Speaker 2: look the program thing we did get into. Oh that's
Speaker 2: the fact. That's another thing too. And every parent does this,
Speaker 2: so your kid has a good night's sleep. So what
Speaker 2: you do the next day is you try and mimic
Speaker 2: exactly what you did leading up to that good sleep.
Speaker 2: Everybody that and I just thought it's worth noting that
Speaker 2: doesn't work.
Speaker 1: I didn't pay any attention to actual like sleep program.
Speaker 2: And we paid someone to come in.
Speaker 1: What do they teach you?
Speaker 2: Look, it's more of the support, I would say. They
Speaker 2: sort of give you a rough idea of what to
Speaker 2: look out for, what to be doing, when to do it,
Speaker 2: What do you look out for, just like tired signs early,
Speaker 2: that sort of stuff, because you want to get rubbing
Speaker 2: the eyes or you want to get onto their routine
Speaker 2: before they're overtired, and you don't want to start the
Speaker 2: routine when they're already tired and by the time you
Speaker 2: finish it they're overtired. You don't want to do that.
Speaker 2: But also like I feel like and I have this
Speaker 2: conversation with a lot of people about I'm not sleep
Speaker 2: exper I'm just put that in there that they try
Speaker 2: to put their kids into a routine too early. They're like,
Speaker 2: and look, it's it's crazy because the world has like
Speaker 2: and like social media has sort of made a lot
Speaker 2: of people think that, Okay, well what am I doing
Speaker 2: wrong because I can't get my kid into a routine.
Speaker 2: It's like your kids three months, chill out, yeah, just
Speaker 2: go with the flow. I think that's a difference between
Speaker 2: Oscar and Macy's where we went more with the flow
Speaker 2: with Macy where it's like if she falls asleep on
Speaker 2: me right now at three months, who gives a shit?
Speaker 2: But with the first one, because you're like, there's so
Speaker 2: much pressure on a your mum, which sucks and new
Speaker 2: parents in general, that you've got to be getting into
Speaker 2: a routine so quickly, Like my kids are what four
Speaker 2: and nearly two. Macy's got a slight routine. Oscar was
Speaker 2: really routine from two onwards and finally he sleeps now
Speaker 2: so it'll work. Early on it was pretty much pointless
Speaker 2: because you're like, oh, we've got this routine and then
Speaker 2: they regress.
Speaker 1: Because then if you try and adhere to that routine.
Speaker 1: You will never leave the house.
Speaker 2: No, And there was a time there we didn't where
Speaker 2: it was like, oh fuck, like we can't leave the
Speaker 2: house because we've got to do an hour.
Speaker 1: It's spirals and spirals. Yeah, that's when it gets high.
Speaker 2: The worst is when you go you do so many
Speaker 2: weeks and it's like starting to pay off, like great,
Speaker 2: and then they regress and they hit the worst word
Speaker 2: in the English dictionary, which is a leap. I hit
Speaker 2: a leap and.
Speaker 1: Going my spine.
Speaker 2: I'm so glad I don't really have to hear that
Speaker 2: word anymore.
Speaker 1: Question number two ash thoughts on plac center encapsulation. Would
Speaker 1: you take the capsules yourself?
Speaker 2: What the fuck does any of that mean?
Speaker 1: We I'm glad you asked. I've googled this, I've googled.
Speaker 2: I literally don't know what any of those words were
Speaker 2: that you just gave to me.
Speaker 1: Plus center encapsulation.
Speaker 2: Do you want to guess what I think it means?
Speaker 1: Go on?
Speaker 2: Yeah, I have a try something to do with trapping
Speaker 2: the placenta.
Speaker 1: Yeah, well pretty much pretty much. But when you say trap,
Speaker 1: it means like you're like setting like a bear traff
Speaker 1: at nighttime. It comes, and then you come back the
Speaker 1: next day and you're like, well, we've got boys, and
Speaker 1: you're like, oh, we've got this is a good size.
Speaker 2: It's kind of like it it's funny that like every
Speaker 2: time you know, you're talking with your other parent friends,
Speaker 2: there's always someone who's got a story about something to
Speaker 2: do with the placenta.
Speaker 1: There's always someone out there who's a little bit.
Speaker 2: And I saw like someone baked bread with it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, because you can drive it out and well, this
Speaker 1: is kind of just kind of what this is. So
Speaker 1: let me read you to your description. Okay. In the
Speaker 1: placenta encapsulation process, the placenta is steamed, dehydrated, ground into
Speaker 1: a powder, and then sealed envitamin sized capsules. What why
Speaker 1: There are companies out there that will do it for you,
Speaker 1: And if you work with your duela, she might offer
Speaker 1: that service as well. And if you're wondering why, it
Speaker 1: says here keyword is possible. The possible benefits of placenta
Speaker 1: encapsulation include a decrease in postparter mood disorders good thing, possible,
Speaker 1: increased production of oxytocin possibility, decrease in stress hormones another possibility,
Speaker 1: and restoration of iron levels following bleeding after birth, and
Speaker 1: an increase of milk.
Speaker 2: Supply or from It's like a mirror. I'm pretty sure
Speaker 2: there's a multivitamin out there that does all of that, surely,
Speaker 2: But it's not made out of a human organ. Is
Speaker 2: it an organ I don't even know. Yeah, i'd say
Speaker 2: it's helped create life, of course, I mean.
Speaker 1: If you're just taking a capsule. But even the thought
Speaker 1: of it.
Speaker 2: I love how it's said there, if you can't do it.
Speaker 1: Yourself, organizations out there?
Speaker 2: Who on earth is doing that themselves? How many ways
Speaker 2: you need to cook that thing? You dried it, you
Speaker 2: steamed it, you grilled it, your air fryer marinated, you
Speaker 2: marinated it.
Speaker 1: It's delicious.
Speaker 2: Grounded it into a fine powder, there'd be nothing left.
Speaker 2: It just be like eating a capsule full of sand.
Speaker 1: But I always think I've tried to take fish capsules
Speaker 1: like fish oil, and I'll take it.
Speaker 2: And then burbie fish.
Speaker 1: Yeah, burb and you can taste the fish.
Speaker 2: I love how they also on that fish oil thing,
Speaker 2: they're like, yeah, no, like it's got no aftertaste. Bullshit.
Speaker 1: It absolutely does. Imagine the aftertaste of placenta.
Speaker 2: I don't know what the foretaste of placenta would be, and.
Speaker 1: For no guarantee of the benefits.
Speaker 2: It's just like just possible.
Speaker 1: It might help or it may not do anything at.
Speaker 2: All, all right, So the question was would I tell yeah,
Speaker 2: so why would I need to take it?
Speaker 1: I'm going to take a guess, or like your wife
Speaker 1: or your partner is going through it, then I guess
Speaker 1: it may be nice to also join her along that journey.
Speaker 2: A look, if April was like, this is what we're
Speaker 2: going to do, well I'm going to do I'd be like,
Speaker 2: you can do that. I'll support you and what you do. One,
Speaker 2: You're not doing it in the house. Don't bring that
Speaker 2: thing back here too, It's not for me.
Speaker 1: So can I take a guess and say that during childbirth,
Speaker 1: did they ask you the question of like do you
Speaker 1: want to like they have this thing in a tub,
Speaker 1: like do you want to keep it? Do you remember that?
Speaker 2: Nah? Nah? Like first one was ended up being an
Speaker 2: emergency C section, so.
Speaker 1: There was no like discussion of well, then we're about
Speaker 1: number two today it.
Speaker 2: Was a plan C section. There's no discussion of that either.
Speaker 2: So I've missed out on two plent they're missing. If
Speaker 2: anyone sees two placentas, they're my wife's, she definitely doesn't
Speaker 2: want to.
Speaker 1: I think I'm trying to, like calf my memory back
Speaker 1: to childbirth, and I'm pretty sure it's and there's so
Speaker 1: much going on.
Speaker 2: Did you faint?
Speaker 1: No, no fainting.
Speaker 2: I did.
Speaker 1: We'll say that for another story. This thing's big, like
Speaker 1: it's a it's a big, hunky like meaty. It's not
Speaker 1: just like a little dainty thing.
Speaker 2: Well people like eat it right, yeah, and it.
Speaker 1: Looks fucking awful and they say like, do you want
Speaker 1: to do? You want to keep it? What do you
Speaker 1: want us to do?
Speaker 2: How do you want to cook? So we've got an
Speaker 2: fer over here, a steamer over here with a smoker
Speaker 2: on this side, or we could grill it.
Speaker 1: Medium rarely pepercorn sauce, sureroom sauce. But if Laura wanted
Speaker 1: to do it, I'd be like, go knock yourself out,
Speaker 1: but I'm not jumping on.
Speaker 2: And don't kiss me after it.
Speaker 1: Let's center encapsulation, not for me, not for me.
Speaker 2: If the fact is it's like us, think with these things,
Speaker 2: how did we get there? How did the person who
Speaker 2: came up with this get there.
Speaker 1: Well, I guess maybe it's because animals in the wild
Speaker 1: would eat the percenta.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but I get that. But I mean, how do
Speaker 2: who was thinking let's go through all these processes to
Speaker 2: get it to a fine capsule. What was that person thinking?
Speaker 2: Were they like, what were they hoping to achieve? I
Speaker 2: just don't know how we got it.
Speaker 1: It does like it kind of appeals to me a
Speaker 1: little bit, and like the primal aspect, like truly in
Speaker 1: the animals in the wild, But I think animals in
Speaker 1: the wild eat the percenta to like, obviously you don't
Speaker 1: want to have anything that's going to try.
Speaker 2: Animals in the world just kill each other for food. Matt.
Speaker 2: I'm not basing my eating a placenta.
Speaker 1: Of what it how it does in the wild of a.
Speaker 2: Prime just because of the primal aspect of it. It's
Speaker 2: from me, from me.
Speaker 1: We did have a third question I've looked at the time.
Speaker 2: Ash, We'll make it a quick one, Yeah, just make
Speaker 2: it really que bang it out anyway.
Speaker 1: Okay, what is the most asshole thing your child has
Speaker 1: said and done? Do you order someone else?
Speaker 2: Nothing for me comes to mind. I do have a
Speaker 2: funny story about a friend so, as we all know,
Speaker 2: as a kids get a little bit older, two three,
Speaker 2: getting him into bigger car seats, it becomes a struggle.
Speaker 2: So a friend of mine was at the park trying
Speaker 2: to leave the park, trying to put his kid into
Speaker 2: the car seat, and she was obviously not obliging, so
Speaker 2: she started to scream help. Just so we've got a
Speaker 2: fully grown man trying to abduct a three year old
Speaker 2: child and dreaming.
Speaker 1: People come over.
Speaker 2: Non he got really lucky that the people were at
Speaker 2: the park also saw them, Like, yeah, it was definitely,
Speaker 2: but like he was saying to me, it's happened more
Speaker 2: than once, and it's aole. That's an asshole move, that's toxics.
Speaker 2: I know, it's crazy. Like imagine like the embarrassment of
Speaker 2: that of people thinking you're abducting this child.
Speaker 1: And also you have to like go through and get
Speaker 1: photos if someone goes to you abducting that child, to
Speaker 1: then try and convince.
Speaker 2: The last thing I want to do is steal my
Speaker 2: own child. Okay, if someone else, so your mate, take
Speaker 2: him with you. Thankfully it hasn't happened to me yet.
Speaker 2: What about you? To me? Your kids aren't assholes?
Speaker 1: I reck well, sometimes they have their moments, and I'm
Speaker 1: I'm a bit of a sensitive soul.
Speaker 2: Lash I picked up on that I only cried before
Speaker 2: when I was talking to you about my hospital.
Speaker 1: Was it the tears when you told me about your story?
Speaker 2: I reckon.
Speaker 1: The most asshole thing my kids have done is probably
Speaker 1: when just like Miley will look at me and be
Speaker 1: like I love you anymore.
Speaker 2: It's brutal, isn't it. I don't want to play with you.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you're not my best friend.
Speaker 2: Ah dagger, absolute dagger.
Speaker 1: And sometimes you know, I take offense to that, and
Speaker 1: I'm like, you can't.
Speaker 2: I just got it. You can't say that to me, especially.
Speaker 1: In public, so that that hurts. Or sometimes if I
Speaker 1: really try and do something nice, like you're going to
Speaker 1: go to Kmart, maybe I'll give her a little treat,
Speaker 1: and she's just like, doesn't give me anything in return.
Speaker 1: In return, she's like like a border a jumper once
Speaker 1: and she was like, I hate this jumper and it
Speaker 1: was meant to be, like it's really sweet, Daddy daugh
Speaker 1: at a moment where I was like, she's gonna love
Speaker 1: this and like it's a cute little pink jumper, and
Speaker 1: she's just like spitting.
Speaker 2: On it when you go and buy them something they
Speaker 2: need and then they try and swap it out with
Speaker 2: something they want on the way out. Yeah, it's like
Speaker 2: I want this instead. It's like a toylet.
Speaker 1: It's a loveless game we play.
Speaker 2: Yes, I'm sure that every parent at some stage their
Speaker 2: kids gone, I don't love you anymore.
Speaker 1: I will this house right now.
Speaker 2: This is my world.
Speaker 1: You're just living in ash Wicks.
Speaker 2: Yes, that is time. Time, it's time to wrap us up.
Speaker 1: Thank you for joining us.
Speaker 2: Yes, thank you guys again.
Speaker 1: If you have listened and you've enjoyed this episode, we
Speaker 1: would love it more than anything, more than the children.
Speaker 2: That we own.
Speaker 1: That if you subscribed, and if you gave us a review,
Speaker 1: a few words, if you will, and maybe five stars.
Speaker 2: And check out our Instagram as well.
Speaker 1: Well.
Speaker 2: Thanks again.
Speaker 1: We will at some point, We're not sure when. Maybe
Speaker 1: not next week, maybe not the week after that, but
Speaker 1: we will do an interview with other parents.
Speaker 2: Yeah, we want to try and get some other dads on,
Speaker 2: even moms. I mean I don't want to, like I
Speaker 2: just sort of threw that because we had two. I
Speaker 2: would honestly hate to be a woman sitting in this
Speaker 2: room when what happens when the microphones were off the farting, Oh.
Speaker 1: My god, Oh I like got backed up right now.
Speaker 2: They've got that growling in my stomach anyway, But yeah,
Speaker 2: we definitely want to try and get some other parents on.
Speaker 1: But if there's any parents you want to have us interview,
Speaker 1: we are absolutely open to any thoughts.
Speaker 2: If you know them personally and it's probably best.
Speaker 1: But until then, thank you very much. We see next week.
Speaker 1: There Two Doting Dads podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of
Speaker 1: country throughout Australia and the connections to land, sea and community.
Speaker 1: We pay our respects to the elders past and present
Speaker 1: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait
Speaker 1: Islander peoples today. This episode was recorded on Gadaga Land