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Speaker 1: Have I ever told you about my mate? I got

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Speaker 1: to take my bush turkey? Please continue.

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Speaker 2: I don't know why he went after a bush turkey,

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Speaker 2: but he did, and it tore him to shreds.

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Speaker 3: Yeah you're overpowered by a bush turkey. Yeah, it turned

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Speaker 3: on him and just pecked the shit out of him.

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Speaker 3: He added up in hospital and everything. Just boot it

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Speaker 3: and think you try it?

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Speaker 1: Is he scared of bush turkeys? Now I don't know.

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Speaker 2: I'm not friends with him after that.

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Speaker 1: Welcome back to two notting dads. I am Mattie Jay

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Speaker 1: and I am This is a podcast all about parenting.

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Speaker 1: It is the good, it is.

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Speaker 2: The bad and the relatable.

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Speaker 1: And if you have come wanting any type of advice,

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Speaker 1: stop right now, press pause, stop. Thank you very much.

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Speaker 1: I need some but I need some buddy with a

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Speaker 1: human touch. Cracking song spice girls. Yeah, absolutely nothing wrong

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Speaker 1: with him, but I have to apologize just quickly. You've

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Speaker 1: come into a construction site.

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Speaker 2: I noticed I jumped the neighbors fence to get in.

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Speaker 1: There's a lot of a lot of men here, a

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Speaker 1: lot of men. I'll explain why they are all here. Why. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: let's have a drink first.

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Speaker 2: Yes, and today is something very different, something both of

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Speaker 2: us haven't had before from Stone and Wood. So it's

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Speaker 2: called the Northern Rivers be or NRB.

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Speaker 1: This is a cute little can.

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Speaker 2: It is cute. Yeah, I haven't had this one before either,

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Speaker 2: so will quickly crack this, have a little taste and

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Speaker 2: just let everyone know why it's so special.

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Speaker 1: So this is it's a limited limited in location as well,

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Speaker 1: so you can actually only get this in bottle shops

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Speaker 1: between Tweed and Yamber or online or online. I feel

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Speaker 1: that were one of the only people right now in

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Speaker 1: Sydney drinking.

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Speaker 2: Oh, that's delightful, multi.

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Speaker 1: Ooh, here's a hint of malt there.

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Speaker 2: It's multier than the other beers that they have. There's

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Speaker 2: a little floral do.

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Speaker 1: You say, there's a subtle malt flavor, low bitterness. But

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Speaker 1: but that is bloody delish.

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Speaker 2: And it's apparently the greenest beer not in color the environment.

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Speaker 1: Saint Patrick's Day. No, that do you mean?

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Speaker 3: Ash seventy percent certified sustainable molt and one hundred cent

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Speaker 3: certified sustainable hops.

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Speaker 2: Now, I don't wonder what you're thinking. What do you

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Speaker 2: mean by certified sustainable? All it means really is they

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Speaker 2: use less energy overall when brewing this beer. It's also

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Speaker 2: brewed in carbon neutral berries, making it the greenest beer.

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Speaker 1: Oh, you mean like they're using less water. Yes, Matt.

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Speaker 2: Anything that uses less energy and is better for the environment.

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Speaker 2: That is what this beer is all about. Cheers to

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Speaker 2: that is to that And good news for the listeners,

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Speaker 2: Matt is we are giving away a case of this

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Speaker 2: NRB this week.

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Speaker 1: All you have to do is what you have to

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Speaker 1: post a story of you listening to the podcast at

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Speaker 1: two doting dads tag Us tag Stone and would follow

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Speaker 1: both accounts, and we'll pick someone each week to have

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Speaker 1: this case of NIB sent directly to your front door.

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Speaker 2: It will be missing a couple because we thank you

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Speaker 2: Stony Wood.

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Speaker 1: For making this episode possible. How are you, Matt, it's

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Speaker 1: been it's been stressful. Have you recovered from you're sick?

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Speaker 2: Oh? I am?

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Speaker 1: I am. I'm holding on to the end my life

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Speaker 1: cycle ash of a flu. I would say it almost

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Speaker 1: always starts with the tingle, a sore throat. That sore

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Speaker 1: throat turns flemy. I have phlegm for four days and

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Speaker 1: then I come good. You're very routined, man. I find

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Speaker 1: I am like every single time, I'm like, come on,

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Speaker 1: sore throat, just and and I'm in the Flemy stage.

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Speaker 2: It's such a relief when you're in the Flemy stone age,

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Speaker 2: and like the feeling of getting a good bit of phlem.

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Speaker 1: Oh mate. This morning, I coughed up some phlegm and

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Speaker 1: I spat it out and it was like it had

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Speaker 1: it had the flem had veins in, it had like red.

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Speaker 1: It was like it was part of a brain.

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Speaker 2: There's any doctors listening, what's happening.

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Speaker 1: I'm just coughing up part of my lung. But I

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Speaker 1: felt great. I felt better afterwards. But in addition to

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Speaker 1: being a little bit sick at the moment, we do

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Speaker 1: have a number of tradesmen currently at my house, and

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Speaker 1: you may recall that they will probably start drilling soon,

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Speaker 1: so if they do apologize, I sometimes like to make

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Speaker 1: myself sound a bit more masculine when I talk to

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Speaker 1: the tradesman.

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Speaker 2: Is that why tools are out down?

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Speaker 1: I get it, I get it. He was explaining to

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Speaker 1: me what's wrong with the air of the house of

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Speaker 1: trying to fix It's a front window. You may recall

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Speaker 1: ash there was a little leak, a tiny little leak,

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Speaker 1: and every time it rained. We'll just be doing a

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Speaker 1: lot of lately in Sydney.

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Speaker 2: This is the same bedroom that you stuffed me into

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Speaker 2: when I came and stay.

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Speaker 1: This is this is that the guest room slash ash,

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Speaker 1: and my mum's room and the mold room. And so

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Speaker 1: he came along. He looked at it and goes, oh, yeah,

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Speaker 1: we're just going to patch this little thing up here

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Speaker 1: under the windows sill and you'll be good to go.

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Speaker 1: There's no window. So so as he started patching up,

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Speaker 1: he goes, oh, there's something wrong here. So he starts

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Speaker 1: taking away a bit of the Oh no, it's the word,

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Speaker 1: not the.

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Speaker 2: Jip rock is the house.

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Speaker 1: And then the more he took away, the more he

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Speaker 1: realized we have a big problem.

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Speaker 2: Tradies will do that once they get them in a

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Speaker 2: we're going to have a thing against trades.

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Speaker 1: Now. I'm not one to question, you know. The he

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Speaker 1: could say anything to me. He could say the wall

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Speaker 1: was about to fall down and we need to rebuild

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Speaker 1: the whole thing, and I would reply and say, gosh,

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Speaker 1: thank goodness, you spotted it. Better get to it. So

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Speaker 1: the window apparently wasn't wasn't drilled in. It was just

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Speaker 1: it was like it was like sitting there with some

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Speaker 1: type of adhesive. Anyway, they removed the entire window. So

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Speaker 1: what was meant to be a three hour job has

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Speaker 1: turned into a three day job and I'm now missing

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Speaker 1: the entire front window of my house.

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Speaker 2: I turned up and I was like, how am I

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Speaker 2: going to get in? Had to jump my neighbors fence.

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Speaker 1: But also I then had to explain to the three

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Speaker 1: boys and say, I do a podcast and would you

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Speaker 1: mind putting your tools down? And they were like, what's

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Speaker 1: a podcast? So yeah, so if they start drilling, I'm

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Speaker 1: not going to tell them to stop. You're going to

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Speaker 1: have to go out there because you're more masculine than

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Speaker 1: I am. Some have said that, and you also you're

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Speaker 1: part much.

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Speaker 2: You watch my accent change completely. I will go from

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Speaker 2: being like this to be like listening, turn it down?

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Speaker 1: Will Can you check what kind of wood they're using

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Speaker 1: for the window frame? What type was it?

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Speaker 2: I need to get a closer inspection, but I would

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Speaker 2: say it's probably some sort of hard wood considering unless

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Speaker 2: I'm it's something a bit more lightweight, like cedar because

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Speaker 2: it can be outside.

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Speaker 1: I do think they might use the seedar for anyone

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Speaker 1: who doesn't know ashwork in a timber yard, so he

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Speaker 1: knows wood.

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Speaker 2: And it's not a gay club.

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Speaker 1: What woods? This table?

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Speaker 2: By the way, is it oak?

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Speaker 1: Thank you? It's Tasmania. I'm pretty sure.

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Speaker 2: Is it something either that or American oak something like that.

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Speaker 2: Don't leave this in the rain anyway.

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Speaker 1: When are they going to be done? Maybe tomorrow?

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Speaker 2: Okay, your mum's back this week, isn't she? No?

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Speaker 1: Or she is back in the country. But she's back

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Speaker 1: in Brisbane right And when she comes back to Sydney.

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Speaker 3: I can't wait to get her back on the podcast.

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Speaker 3: She's going to come on the podcast. She's going to

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Speaker 3: update us. She just did a Kentucky to her, she's

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Speaker 3: essentially on a Kentigy tour and I would get these

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Speaker 3: updates from her. I should have I should have spoken

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Speaker 3: to her more frequently, but maybe every three days we'd

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Speaker 3: touch base, and every time i'd speak to her, she'd

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Speaker 3: been scammed again. She's been scammed more times than anyone

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Speaker 3: that I know who's gone on an overseas tree.

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Speaker 2: I love that. I can imagine her too. She's so

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Speaker 2: easily startled, so she was just seen like.

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Speaker 1: Any bit of transit. She was going to a couple

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Speaker 1: of places in France. Anytime she had to move to

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Speaker 1: another hotel, they were just like, this woman is easy prey.

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah. The taxi drivers are scamming her, people on

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Speaker 1: the street are scamming her. Even other tourists are like,

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Speaker 1: she's so easily scammed. I'm going to scam her.

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Speaker 2: Oh that's great. I love that. I hope she's having

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Speaker 2: a great time. She's listening, which she will be.

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Speaker 1: She will be always listens. But how are you? How

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Speaker 1: are good? Good? Good good?

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Speaker 2: Macy has been sick.

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Speaker 3: Everyone's sick, mate, It's getting around.

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Speaker 2: So we had a bit of a couch rot day yesterday.

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Speaker 2: Were just sorry, couch rot. Macey just sat on the

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Speaker 2: couch all day because she's poor things sick.

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Speaker 1: Who's coin phrase? Couch rot?

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Speaker 2: I think the next generation has which not our generation.

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Speaker 2: It's a new generation thing on social media. I love it,

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Speaker 2: bed roight couch rot. I've just pretty much said anyone

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Speaker 2: that is lazy and now essentially just rotten away.

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Speaker 1: I love it.

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Speaker 2: I love that, I love it. I love to bed rot.

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Speaker 1: It's one of my favorite things. What were you guys

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Speaker 1: watching on the couch rot? A mixture but a pepper Pig.

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Speaker 1: Yesterday we watched sing cracking film. It is a good one,

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Speaker 1: one of the best.

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Speaker 2: We watched a bit of YouTube which Macy does. This

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Speaker 2: thing with YouTube now is because you know how the

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Speaker 2: ads in the middle. She'll just yell out ad until

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Speaker 2: I eventually hit skip. Like but all of the painkillers

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Speaker 2: has made Paul Macy very constipated. So she found her

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Speaker 2: in the cupboard again. Remember ages ago she was stealing

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Speaker 2: the mints. No like eight months ago. I said, I

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Speaker 2: lost Macy and I found her because she could smell

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Speaker 2: poo coming from the wardrobe. She just hides in the

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Speaker 2: wardrobe two hours. She was in the wardrobe this afternoon

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Speaker 2: and every time I go.

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Speaker 1: Do there not yet she was trying to do a

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Speaker 1: little pool. She was trying to I say, little poo,

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Speaker 1: but talk about it. If there's one thing that little

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Speaker 1: girl can do, it's big poos. She is she I've

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Speaker 1: never seen anything like it, something so small and delicate

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Speaker 1: and beautiful can produce something.

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Speaker 2: And this morning she was like a hit its peek

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Speaker 2: this morning where I've come downstairs and she's screaming and

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Speaker 2: April's like to help, trying to help her push it out.

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Speaker 2: I don't know if you've ever heard a scream of

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Speaker 2: a young girl who's constipated but a wretchet man?

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Speaker 1: Do you give them? Like I saw it on your

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Speaker 1: cupboard recently, you have a big container of metamucile. I

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Speaker 1: told her that in confident. Could you kind of sneak

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Speaker 1: in a couple of drink? I've never tried it. That's great,

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Speaker 1: she gets please not sponsored. Can you give her anything

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Speaker 1: to help the food come out?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, there's like mover cole and stuff like that, but

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Speaker 2: she just needs to stop eating ship not like actual shit,

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Speaker 2: but like she needs more fruit, like good fibrous fruit.

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Speaker 1: But yeah, dealing with that.

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Speaker 2: I was away over the weekend, so I missed the union,

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Speaker 2: the kids union.

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Speaker 1: I was going to ask you, I was how is

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Speaker 1: that investment going?

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Speaker 2: The investment's going great. They're playing really well.

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Speaker 1: What's the team called the game?

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Speaker 2: They call the Under six of Lambie Jets. Now, I

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Speaker 2: did miss this weekend's game, but I got to update

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Speaker 2: where we are. There was a drama, okay, within the

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Speaker 2: first ten minutes. As you know, it's been really wet Hasten,

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Speaker 2: Sydney for the last month, let's call it a month, yeap.

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Speaker 1: But the fields are open, but they were quite muddy.

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Speaker 2: So there was a lot of slips and falls, and

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Speaker 2: it just so happened that Oscar happened to be the

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Speaker 2: first slip in fall I heard in the mud?

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Speaker 1: Is he a child that? I feel like? Some kids

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Speaker 1: really enjoy the wet others hate it. Marley is one.

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Speaker 1: She doesn't like getting dirty, doesn't like getting wet in

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Speaker 1: any capacity. Is Oscar? Where's he on that scale?

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Speaker 2: He slipped in the among the first ten minutes and

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Speaker 2: they had to go home, and now it doesn't want

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Speaker 2: to go back.

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Speaker 1: Ah, he's blaming rugby union. That's the one thing they

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Speaker 1: can like, one little bad experience, and that that activity

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Speaker 1: is entirely tarnished.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. So there was a few slips, a few falls,

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Speaker 2: there's a couple of sore heads. All in all, played

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Speaker 2: really well. We don't keep score, of course, because they're

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Speaker 2: so young. I would say we want player of the

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Speaker 2: match Mac. I'm going this week Oscar will be attending.

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Speaker 1: How are you going to get it back on the field.

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Speaker 2: Just got to pick yourself up, boy, Just drag him

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Speaker 2: on a pep talk, Give the team a pep talk.

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Speaker 2: There's the footage of some of the some of the kids.

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Speaker 2: One kid in particular who's very good, Hugo, Young Hugo,

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Speaker 2: which is the son of Zach Beer.

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Speaker 1: Hugo is a strong name. I show you this footage afterwards,

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Speaker 1: but he's just I've actually already seen it. Oh, I've

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Speaker 1: seen it online. You're checking it on where it got.

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Speaker 1: I didn't go hunting for the footage. I found the

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Speaker 1: footage and I was to Laura. I was like, look,

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Speaker 1: that's the that's the team we sponsored. And she was like,

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Speaker 1: there are a bunch of kids, and I was like,

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Speaker 1: how dare you? How dare you?

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Speaker 2: You got to start somewhere.

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Speaker 1: Disrespect the athletes like that.

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Speaker 2: And athletes is correct, I think, And we maybe invest

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Speaker 2: a little bit more money into Hugo.

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Speaker 1: What do you how much are we talking our sky's

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Speaker 1: limits for this? Okay, we want to lock him down.

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Speaker 1: He's like a future Nathan Cleary. I was thinking about

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Speaker 1: locking him down for the next thirty five years. Okay,

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Speaker 1: sure's let's talk budgets.

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Speaker 3: After the podcast treats, we'll should get us to the

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Speaker 3: first couple a pack of snakes.

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Speaker 2: But anyway, they're going, well, I'll keep you updated with

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Speaker 2: anything that happens this week.

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Speaker 1: When would you like me to come and help out

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Speaker 1: as water boy? Very good question. We'll organize the time.

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Speaker 1: Maybe not this week, maybe not next because I'm away.

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Speaker 2: It's a long let me know, go twenty six rounds,

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Speaker 2: it's a long season.

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Speaker 1: I had something happened to me, Ash, which I can

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Speaker 1: only assume that this has never happened to you before.

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Speaker 1: And I promise you this is a truthful story. Okay,

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Speaker 1: I'm not embellishing it in any capacity.

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Speaker 2: I'm strapped in.

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Speaker 1: I'm going to tell you exactly what happened. It was

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Speaker 1: a very unique situation that I found myself in fire

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Speaker 1: Away on Sunday. Laura was up at the crack of

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Speaker 1: dawn standard and I was also awake. You know, sometimes

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Speaker 1: I like to give Laura, not to make myself sound

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Speaker 1: like an absolute hero. I like to give Laura a

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Speaker 1: little lieon. And Lola was like, what are we doing, daddy?

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Speaker 1: And I was like, you know what, Let's go get

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Speaker 1: Let's go get some croissants. How you say croissant, baby Chino?

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Speaker 1: And I can get my morning coffee because that's my

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Speaker 1: favorite time of the day. Ash.

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Speaker 2: How do you order the croissant? Do you say croissant

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Speaker 2: or croissant.

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Speaker 1: I say, I say, and then I say, and then

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Speaker 1: I say MESSI oh, it's.

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Speaker 2: Such an ick when like behind someone to line, I

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Speaker 2: just get a plan quassan.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you hate it when I try and talk in

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Speaker 1: the dialect of the country where the food comes from.

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Speaker 2: We're not in the country where the food comes from.

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Speaker 1: No, I know, but the crosshind is friends. You attacked

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Speaker 1: me like this on the podcast. I ordered my coffee

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Speaker 1: and I have a keep cup. They prefer the keep

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Speaker 1: cup without the lid on it. Right. See, when I

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Speaker 1: order it, I hand over the keep cup with no lid.

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Speaker 1: You keep the lid. I keep the lid. I put

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Speaker 1: the lid back on once the coffee is made. That's

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Speaker 1: just how they operate, and I'm happy. That's pretty standard.

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Speaker 1: I think I think it's pretty standard. I put the

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Speaker 1: lid back into the pram because that's where Lola is, yep,

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Speaker 1: and we wait for the coffee to be made. The

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Speaker 1: coffe it gets made. I then get the lid from

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Speaker 1: the pram and I put it back on the keep

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Speaker 1: cup and I start to screw it tight. Something strange

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Speaker 1: has happened. I look, and I'm just going to give

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Speaker 1: you a visual reference here so you understand. Okay, so

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Speaker 1: that's got a Keep cup. This is the key. It's

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Speaker 1: not like the brand Keep cup. I screw it on. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I look at the cup and I have half a

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Speaker 1: caterpillar hanging out. What. Yeah, there's half a caterpillar. It's

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Speaker 1: been severed by the Keep cup as I screwed it on.

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Speaker 1: So obviously the caterpillar was in the pram.

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Speaker 2: You've screwed a caterpillar into your coffee. What a way

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Speaker 2: to go the thing?

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Speaker 1: So then I'm like, shit, what do I do here?

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Speaker 1: What's a man to do? I've never found myself in

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Speaker 1: this situation before. Did you blame the caf caterpillars in

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Speaker 1: your milk? No? I couldn't because I was holding onto

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Speaker 1: the lid, right, So the responsibility now was entirely on

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Speaker 1: me the cafe. They have no involvement in the lid.

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Speaker 1: The lid is my responsibility. Okay. It's like when someone's

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Speaker 1: been crushed and you know you can't, like you don't

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Speaker 1: want to, you know that once like you move them

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Speaker 1: away from the car or like what they're being crushed by,

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Speaker 1: they're going to die. And the caterpillars looking at me,

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Speaker 1: going like wooz, don't don't touch anything, leave me be,

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Speaker 1: And I was like, caterpillar, I'm sorry, dude, I've got to.

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Speaker 2: You've already screwed around around, and he's probably the death

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Speaker 2: is imminent.

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Speaker 3: So I unscrew it. One half fall to the floor,

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Speaker 3: the other half into the coffee, into the coffee.

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Speaker 1: Did you drink it? Well? Then I was like, the

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Speaker 1: line for the cafe now is massive. I've beaten the rush.

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Speaker 1: So I'm like, I don't want to order a new coffee.

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Speaker 1: I don't want to pull this coffee out. Also, this

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Speaker 1: is it's metal. It keeps things really hot. This coffee

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Speaker 1: is molten lava. So I go and I get a

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Speaker 1: spoon and I start fishing out the second half of

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Speaker 1: the caterpillar in the coffee cup, trying to find it.

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Speaker 1: And every time I bring the spoon up to the

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Speaker 1: surface and I try and like drizzle out the coffee

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Speaker 1: to see if I can spot the second half of

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Speaker 1: this caterpillar, there's nothing there that's it melted. Well, then

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Speaker 1: I think to myself, I'm going to just drink the coffee.

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Speaker 1: And when I get to that body, you know, obviously

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Speaker 1: I'll I'll notice it in my mouth and I'll spit

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Speaker 1: it out. Ooh ooh. So I start drinking this coffee.

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Speaker 1: It could have easily been like you know that kid

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Speaker 1: that ate the.

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Speaker 2: Slug and he died.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, so there was there was a boy who ate

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Speaker 1: a slug and there's a parasite in the slug killed

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Speaker 1: him and it killed him. That's what I was thinking about.

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Speaker 1: That was at the forefront of my mind. Ash. But

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Speaker 1: I was like, I'm so tired, I'm so desperate for coffee.

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Speaker 1: I'll risk my life. I'm just going to drag to

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Speaker 1: drink it. And Lola was also very confused. She's like, well,

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Speaker 1: I could kill a caterpillar because we love caterpillars. Hungry Caterpillar.

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Speaker 2: Great book that. I don't know if there was a

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Speaker 2: hungry caterpillar ate a coffee in that, but did you

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Speaker 2: find it?

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Speaker 1: Well I started drinking the coffee. Yeah, And I'm also like,

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Speaker 1: does this coffee taste weird?

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Speaker 2: Yes, it's got normal people last for sugar. You ended

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Speaker 2: up with a caterpillar.

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Speaker 1: So I I'm nearing the end and I'm thinking at

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Speaker 1: any point now, I've got the lid off the coffee,

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Speaker 1: and I'm like, I sip and I look, and I sip,

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Speaker 1: and I look, and I sip and I look, and

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Speaker 1: I get to, like my last sip, there's nobody. The

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Speaker 1: caterpillar is nowhere to be found. Well, what do you mean?

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Speaker 1: I don't fucking know, dude, And you're here to tell

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Speaker 1: the tale. I don't know. So then I finished the coffee.

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Speaker 1: I'm thinking, I can only assume that the heat of

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Speaker 1: the coffee, oh, has almost melted away the body of

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Speaker 1: the caterpillar.

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Speaker 2: And now you have super huge strength.

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Speaker 1: I was walking back home and I thought, you're a

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Speaker 1: bit sick. I was like, is this the sickness or

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Speaker 1: is this the caterpillar getting vengeance on me for eating

400
00:19:43,640 --> 00:19:46,200
Speaker 1: its body? I was like, I got this lump in

401
00:19:46,240 --> 00:19:52,000
Speaker 1: my throat, got's are feeling weird? That's disgusting. Has it

402
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Speaker 1: ever happened to you?

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Speaker 2: No, there's a few things I would have done differently,

404
00:19:56,040 --> 00:19:58,560
Speaker 2: so just bear with me. Well, just pick the main one.

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Speaker 2: I would have just ordered another coffee.

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Speaker 1: No, dude, you cannot tell me that you would have

407
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Speaker 1: lined up for another five ten minutes, waited another five

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Speaker 1: ten minutes. We're talking. We're on the cusp now thirty

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Speaker 1: minutes for another cup of coffee. I've got a screaming

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Speaker 1: three year old ash.

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Speaker 2: There's a caterpillar half alive in your coffee. Doesn't matter,

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Speaker 2: todde I once ordered a coffee and I went, I

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Speaker 2: walked out of the coffee shop. I was doing something

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Speaker 2: with the pram. I just put it onto rest on

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Speaker 2: the side of like a pole. It fell off immediately,

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Speaker 2: hadn't even had ai. I just walked away. I'd much

417
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Speaker 2: rather not drink the coffee than have to go through

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Speaker 2: the embarrassment of picking that up, take another ten minutes

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Speaker 2: to get a coffee without being poisoned by a caterpillar.

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Speaker 1: You just you're ignoring what I just said. There was

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Speaker 1: a queue. We were looking at minimum twenty minute wait time.

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Speaker 1: I don't have to. I've you gotta push on, you

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Speaker 1: gotta push on, push onto the next cafe. But I'm

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Speaker 1: also if it's going to wake me up, I'll drink

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Speaker 1: It's fair. Regardless of what's inside that coffee cup.

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Speaker 2: That's fair. And yeah, I probably still wouldn't have drank it.

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Speaker 1: I don't know. That's why you and Mere different, my

428
00:21:08,760 --> 00:21:13,640
Speaker 1: friend different, very different. Tenny environmentalists out there also don't

429
00:21:13,640 --> 00:21:15,520
Speaker 1: come for me. I will put it out there that

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Speaker 1: I love animals of all shapes and sizes.

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Speaker 2: Do the rest of the body start dragging itself away?

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Speaker 1: I ran it over in the prem accidentally. Wow.

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Speaker 2: Okay, that's a series of unfortunate events, and I'm glad

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Speaker 2: you're here to tell the tale.

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00:21:30,240 --> 00:21:33,520
Speaker 1: So far, I will say, I'm feeling okay. I'm not

436
00:21:33,560 --> 00:21:36,320
Speaker 1: out of the woods just yet. Matt.

437
00:21:36,359 --> 00:21:38,400
Speaker 2: It is that time of year again when the New

438
00:21:38,440 --> 00:21:42,400
Speaker 2: South Wales Blues take on the Queensland Maroons.

439
00:21:42,800 --> 00:21:46,080
Speaker 1: Yes, state against state, mate against mate. Ash at the

440
00:21:46,119 --> 00:21:48,879
Speaker 1: time when you and I we put the relationship on pause,

441
00:21:49,040 --> 00:21:52,239
Speaker 1: we do. Yes, we will dislike each other for the

442
00:21:52,280 --> 00:21:54,359
Speaker 1: next couple of weeks until Game three is over and

443
00:21:54,480 --> 00:21:58,480
Speaker 1: Queensland have retained the shield once again, we will see,

444
00:21:58,520 --> 00:21:59,920
Speaker 1: my friend. But one thing is for sure.

445
00:22:00,160 --> 00:22:04,119
Speaker 2: We are partnering with Puma to give away four you

446
00:22:04,200 --> 00:22:07,000
Speaker 2: heard it right, four jerseys that are signed two New

447
00:22:07,040 --> 00:22:11,080
Speaker 2: South Wales and two Queensland. As Matt, how do people

448
00:22:11,359 --> 00:22:13,119
Speaker 2: get their hands on these bad boys?

449
00:22:13,200 --> 00:22:15,320
Speaker 1: As? All you have to do is head to our pages,

450
00:22:15,800 --> 00:22:18,520
Speaker 1: personal pages, or it'll also be on two doting dads.

451
00:22:18,960 --> 00:22:23,520
Speaker 1: There is a photo of yourself and me dressed beautifully

452
00:22:23,600 --> 00:22:26,280
Speaker 1: in moron. You are wearing the disgusting light blue of

453
00:22:26,320 --> 00:22:30,960
Speaker 1: New South Wales, looking delicious, revolting, and all you have

454
00:22:31,000 --> 00:22:32,560
Speaker 1: to do is tag a mate that you would like

455
00:22:32,600 --> 00:22:34,679
Speaker 1: to share the prize with. So we have in total

456
00:22:35,000 --> 00:22:37,240
Speaker 1: four signed jerseys thanks to Puma.

457
00:22:37,440 --> 00:22:40,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, so tag you mate. Who else is your fellow

458
00:22:40,400 --> 00:22:42,640
Speaker 2: state supporter? Who would you watch the game with?

459
00:22:43,000 --> 00:22:45,239
Speaker 1: We'll pick two people, one from Queensland, one from New

460
00:22:45,280 --> 00:22:47,480
Speaker 1: South Wales And just a reminder, you have to also

461
00:22:47,600 --> 00:22:50,800
Speaker 1: be following at Puma Footy on Instagram to be eligible

462
00:22:50,840 --> 00:22:53,040
Speaker 1: to win. Come on, Queensland.

463
00:22:53,280 --> 00:22:57,760
Speaker 2: Good best of luck to you and best of luck

464
00:22:57,760 --> 00:22:58,480
Speaker 2: to Queensland.

465
00:22:59,240 --> 00:23:00,000
Speaker 1: You're going to need it.

466
00:23:00,080 --> 00:23:05,240
Speaker 2: Good luck, Matt. I recently put on our Facebook group

467
00:23:05,320 --> 00:23:06,960
Speaker 2: two Don't Dad Facebook group.

468
00:23:06,800 --> 00:23:09,359
Speaker 1: That is, I saw your post. I want to say,

469
00:23:09,640 --> 00:23:12,240
Speaker 1: considering how many followers we have, the post went viral.

470
00:23:14,480 --> 00:23:17,959
Speaker 1: All one hundred people are right. Normally there's like one

471
00:23:18,080 --> 00:23:20,080
Speaker 1: or two people will comment and I, you know you,

472
00:23:20,119 --> 00:23:22,239
Speaker 1: and I will say something and then like I think,

473
00:23:22,240 --> 00:23:25,400
Speaker 1: a name of Donna is normally the one person who replies, Donna,

474
00:23:25,480 --> 00:23:28,119
Speaker 1: thanks for messaging us. You've got like fourteen comments. My

475
00:23:28,160 --> 00:23:32,240
Speaker 1: friend whoa, that's it? And everyone was on the money,

476
00:23:32,840 --> 00:23:34,440
Speaker 1: the bang on the money.

477
00:23:34,560 --> 00:23:37,119
Speaker 2: So the update, it's not just an update, it's a

478
00:23:37,160 --> 00:23:38,960
Speaker 2: complete change to my parenting style.

479
00:23:39,000 --> 00:23:41,000
Speaker 1: What was your post for those of you, My.

480
00:23:41,040 --> 00:23:43,719
Speaker 2: Post said something along the lines of I just got

481
00:23:43,760 --> 00:23:45,119
Speaker 2: a text message from it were saying, can I have

482
00:23:45,160 --> 00:23:46,280
Speaker 2: the leftover tie? Please?

483
00:23:49,000 --> 00:23:51,520
Speaker 1: At least she's asking can you call her and say no?

484
00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:56,040
Speaker 1: Just calling April? Hey, what do you mean the tie?

485
00:23:56,160 --> 00:23:56,680
Speaker 2: What do you want?

486
00:23:57,600 --> 00:23:57,679
Speaker 1: No?

487
00:23:57,800 --> 00:23:58,359
Speaker 2: That's mine?

488
00:24:00,040 --> 00:24:00,600
Speaker 1: A bit late?

489
00:24:01,359 --> 00:24:02,000
Speaker 2: You ate it?

490
00:24:03,119 --> 00:24:03,920
Speaker 1: I literally just.

491
00:24:05,480 --> 00:24:07,359
Speaker 2: Well put it back in the fridge immediately.

492
00:24:09,040 --> 00:24:11,880
Speaker 1: You're not even high. You wouldn't need it, And I'm

493
00:24:11,920 --> 00:24:16,200
Speaker 1: just messing with you. Hi, April, Hi, how you going?

494
00:24:16,320 --> 00:24:20,000
Speaker 1: Don't pretend like it's not been eaten already. When I

495
00:24:20,040 --> 00:24:22,080
Speaker 1: texted you, I was actually eating it because I was like, oh,

496
00:24:22,119 --> 00:24:27,399
Speaker 1: I better just do very good.

497
00:24:28,000 --> 00:24:30,160
Speaker 2: I was just letting our listeners know about our big

498
00:24:30,200 --> 00:24:32,240
Speaker 2: update and announcement that we've got the.

499
00:24:33,760 --> 00:24:37,960
Speaker 1: Big party, April. I'll be there black.

500
00:24:39,760 --> 00:24:42,399
Speaker 2: April's really self conscious that she's not done enough or

501
00:24:42,440 --> 00:24:44,639
Speaker 2: not going to have done enough, which I think is ridiculous.

502
00:24:44,680 --> 00:24:47,960
Speaker 1: Will there be a petting zoo there? Not quite? It's

503
00:24:48,000 --> 00:24:53,119
Speaker 1: budget friendly. All right, Thank you, and enjoy your lunch April.

504
00:24:53,160 --> 00:24:54,679
Speaker 1: Thanks for saving me. So I appreciate it.

505
00:24:54,720 --> 00:24:58,240
Speaker 2: Welcome bye, back to it. Okay, so I said it

506
00:24:58,359 --> 00:25:08,000
Speaker 2: says it reads, I wrote, Am I a politician?

507
00:25:08,480 --> 00:25:08,800
Speaker 1: Yes?

508
00:25:09,680 --> 00:25:13,280
Speaker 2: After five years of avoiding this one aspect of parenting,

509
00:25:14,080 --> 00:25:16,280
Speaker 2: they say all good things must come to an end.

510
00:25:16,960 --> 00:25:19,880
Speaker 2: Can you guess what it is? If not, you'll find

511
00:25:19,920 --> 00:25:23,680
Speaker 2: out in the coming weeks that time has come. After

512
00:25:23,760 --> 00:25:27,119
Speaker 2: five years, I've decided to change my whole outlook on

513
00:25:27,200 --> 00:25:30,760
Speaker 2: parenting and throw one of my children a birthday party.

514
00:25:33,040 --> 00:25:37,880
Speaker 1: Don't all claim it once? Wow, I know, I never

515
00:25:37,920 --> 00:25:40,919
Speaker 1: thought the day would come. The day has come, my friend.

516
00:25:42,240 --> 00:25:46,879
Speaker 2: Some of the party planners, no, we can't afford them.

517
00:25:47,040 --> 00:25:50,480
Speaker 1: So what was the catalyst for deciding that this year

518
00:25:50,600 --> 00:25:51,959
Speaker 1: was the year that you were going to throw your

519
00:25:51,960 --> 00:25:52,800
Speaker 1: first birthday party?

520
00:25:52,840 --> 00:25:56,320
Speaker 2: I was shamed online for being a bad dad.

521
00:25:56,440 --> 00:26:01,800
Speaker 1: Actually, can I ask was it? What was it? When

522
00:26:01,800 --> 00:26:04,120
Speaker 1: we jumped on She's on the Money podcast.

523
00:26:03,760 --> 00:26:07,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, that was my money saving tip, and people were like.

524
00:26:07,880 --> 00:26:13,600
Speaker 1: You're a muster. Think of the children, because anyone who

525
00:26:13,640 --> 00:26:17,040
Speaker 1: doesn't know we jumped on. We were guest hosts of

526
00:26:17,080 --> 00:26:21,200
Speaker 1: that podcast. And it's not a serious money saving it's

527
00:26:21,280 --> 00:26:24,040
Speaker 1: kind of a half serious, half joke. Yeah, there were

528
00:26:24,080 --> 00:26:25,159
Speaker 1: a few outrage people.

529
00:26:25,400 --> 00:26:26,240
Speaker 2: They were outrage.

530
00:26:26,280 --> 00:26:28,520
Speaker 1: They didn't know us. They don't know the context. I

531
00:26:28,520 --> 00:26:30,199
Speaker 1: don't know the context. They don't know that.

532
00:26:31,000 --> 00:26:36,879
Speaker 2: I like to tell jokes and that's a joke ish.

533
00:26:35,960 --> 00:26:38,159
Speaker 1: Kind of real laugh. But I think it's funny. So

534
00:26:38,320 --> 00:26:39,240
Speaker 1: I've continued with it.

535
00:26:39,520 --> 00:26:42,400
Speaker 2: And someone was like, hey, dare you take the birthday

536
00:26:42,400 --> 00:26:45,560
Speaker 2: away from a child? And it's like, hang in a

537
00:26:45,600 --> 00:26:49,480
Speaker 2: fucking minute, I don't. I've never done that. We do

538
00:26:49,760 --> 00:26:52,160
Speaker 2: celebrate their birthdays. I'm not a gypsy.

539
00:26:52,240 --> 00:26:54,320
Speaker 1: We let Oscar out of his cage. I'm not a

540
00:26:54,400 --> 00:26:55,920
Speaker 1: gypsy shackle him.

541
00:26:58,040 --> 00:27:02,600
Speaker 2: We let him watch us eat cake. If that's how

542
00:27:02,640 --> 00:27:04,679
Speaker 2: they portrayed me, like there was some sort of monster.

543
00:27:05,160 --> 00:27:07,520
Speaker 2: And then they were like when I because I took

544
00:27:08,200 --> 00:27:11,520
Speaker 2: Macy's birthdays the same day as a friends a friend's

545
00:27:12,119 --> 00:27:15,919
Speaker 2: son's birthday, and the joke is so embedded in our

546
00:27:15,960 --> 00:27:18,920
Speaker 2: friend group that they threw Macy into the birthday song

547
00:27:18,960 --> 00:27:23,040
Speaker 2: at the same time. Well I did, and then I

548
00:27:23,880 --> 00:27:26,040
Speaker 2: tagged them in it, saying I've got you next year,

549
00:27:26,160 --> 00:27:30,080
Speaker 2: like it's my turn. Well, well that's a joke too,

550
00:27:30,720 --> 00:27:32,880
Speaker 2: and someone was like, those poor parents.

551
00:27:32,920 --> 00:27:34,200
Speaker 1: I would defriend you like.

552
00:27:34,720 --> 00:27:37,679
Speaker 2: Relax, all right, fucking relax.

553
00:27:37,920 --> 00:27:39,639
Speaker 1: It's a joke, have I said?

554
00:27:40,080 --> 00:27:44,520
Speaker 2: My response to this person's outrage comment was maybe you

555
00:27:44,520 --> 00:27:47,760
Speaker 2: should have a laugh every now and then just left

556
00:27:47,760 --> 00:27:50,879
Speaker 2: it at that, harmless. This is where we've ended up.

557
00:27:51,080 --> 00:27:54,600
Speaker 2: April's gilted me into having a party. Okay, it doesn't

558
00:27:54,600 --> 00:27:59,479
Speaker 2: mean I'm not going to sabotage it. No, we're in

559
00:27:59,560 --> 00:28:02,720
Speaker 2: We're in time. So we are having a party. I

560
00:28:02,760 --> 00:28:03,680
Speaker 2: wonder if you could guess.

561
00:28:03,480 --> 00:28:05,880
Speaker 1: What the theme is now, well, I got my invite.

562
00:28:06,560 --> 00:28:10,440
Speaker 1: Oh you did, I got my invite. That was an accident.

563
00:28:10,960 --> 00:28:12,000
Speaker 1: It's manly themed.

564
00:28:12,040 --> 00:28:14,960
Speaker 2: It's Manly seagulls theme. Yes, so we're having a Manly

565
00:28:15,040 --> 00:28:15,840
Speaker 2: seagulls cake.

566
00:28:16,280 --> 00:28:21,800
Speaker 1: Oh surely, surely you can get the mascot from Manly

567
00:28:21,880 --> 00:28:24,600
Speaker 1: Seagles down to the birthday party. We don't want to

568
00:28:24,600 --> 00:28:26,080
Speaker 1: say where it's being held, but is it in a

569
00:28:26,119 --> 00:28:28,840
Speaker 1: park because that's one of the big questions. Is it indoor,

570
00:28:28,920 --> 00:28:30,439
Speaker 1: outdoor venue, public space?

571
00:28:30,520 --> 00:28:33,640
Speaker 2: There's so many questions when you're like, you know, where

572
00:28:33,640 --> 00:28:34,280
Speaker 2: do you have it?

573
00:28:34,680 --> 00:28:35,360
Speaker 1: What do you do?

574
00:28:35,520 --> 00:28:37,080
Speaker 2: Are we doing too much?

575
00:28:37,160 --> 00:28:38,680
Speaker 1: What's not enough? No?

576
00:28:39,080 --> 00:28:42,680
Speaker 2: We opted for pub love that, so it's a pub

577
00:28:42,720 --> 00:28:45,959
Speaker 2: with a big kids playground, like a big one outside

578
00:28:46,800 --> 00:28:50,040
Speaker 2: and then all like the area that we've booked is

579
00:28:50,080 --> 00:28:52,000
Speaker 2: like up against the park so the kids can all

580
00:28:52,040 --> 00:28:52,560
Speaker 2: play in the park.

581
00:28:52,600 --> 00:28:56,040
Speaker 1: We get a table with shit there? Can I ask?

582
00:28:56,480 --> 00:28:59,240
Speaker 1: What is the mascot? Is a big eagle? It's a

583
00:28:59,240 --> 00:29:00,560
Speaker 1: big eagle. He's at the eagle.

584
00:29:01,000 --> 00:29:04,080
Speaker 2: I was with the manly ceo over the weekend, actually

585
00:29:04,120 --> 00:29:05,040
Speaker 2: got a flight with him on the.

586
00:29:05,200 --> 00:29:09,840
Speaker 1: All right legend. I didn't must be nice, it was

587
00:29:10,000 --> 00:29:15,600
Speaker 1: nice to Can you drop something mainly seagles? Name you?

588
00:29:15,760 --> 00:29:15,880
Speaker 2: Just?

589
00:29:16,320 --> 00:29:24,440
Speaker 1: Oh not the ceo? Already I already dropped with the seals.

590
00:29:24,640 --> 00:29:27,040
Speaker 1: Look how the tables have turned, my friend, I already

591
00:29:27,080 --> 00:29:27,400
Speaker 1: dropped it.

592
00:29:27,400 --> 00:29:31,240
Speaker 2: You didn't need to pick it up, so anyway, could I? Tony?

593
00:29:33,240 --> 00:29:37,000
Speaker 2: I didn't drop. I didn't say I didn't say anything. Okay,

594
00:29:37,000 --> 00:29:40,120
Speaker 2: I haven't said anything. But if they're listening, I will

595
00:29:40,320 --> 00:29:43,040
Speaker 2: would like the mascot for the afternoon. I think maybe

596
00:29:43,080 --> 00:29:43,920
Speaker 2: we could get that done.

597
00:29:44,320 --> 00:29:46,600
Speaker 1: Who is in the mascot? Does it change depending on what.

598
00:29:46,720 --> 00:29:48,400
Speaker 2: I used to have a friend that was the mascot

599
00:29:48,800 --> 00:29:50,760
Speaker 2: years ago. Hundred bucks a game used to get paid.

600
00:29:51,080 --> 00:29:51,680
Speaker 2: That's quite good.

601
00:29:51,760 --> 00:29:56,120
Speaker 1: That's quite good. I could I could I'd gladly invest

602
00:29:56,120 --> 00:29:59,320
Speaker 1: one hundred dollars to see just a smile on Oscar's

603
00:29:59,320 --> 00:30:00,440
Speaker 1: face for the first time.

604
00:30:01,160 --> 00:30:05,000
Speaker 2: Oh that's a low blow, my friend, are they very

605
00:30:05,640 --> 00:30:10,560
Speaker 2: low blow? So my job was to organize the pub,

606
00:30:11,360 --> 00:30:13,120
Speaker 2: organize the booking.

607
00:30:13,280 --> 00:30:17,400
Speaker 1: April's got me dming people. Who are you dming the pub?

608
00:30:18,360 --> 00:30:19,680
Speaker 2: We want to make sure we get that spot at

609
00:30:19,680 --> 00:30:21,320
Speaker 2: the front. I'm like, I'll just call on like the

610
00:30:21,360 --> 00:30:22,800
Speaker 2: week out, Like it's not a huge deal.

611
00:30:22,920 --> 00:30:25,400
Speaker 1: Also another question, did she want you to DM? Because

612
00:30:25,440 --> 00:30:28,800
Speaker 1: they may yes, they know they're talking to Does he

613
00:30:28,880 --> 00:30:31,880
Speaker 1: want to only this guy Ash Wicks you might get

614
00:30:31,920 --> 00:30:33,560
Speaker 1: the VIP space? Yeah?

615
00:30:33,560 --> 00:30:37,760
Speaker 2: So yeah. I was like, I'm a number one manly

616
00:30:37,840 --> 00:30:41,680
Speaker 2: member okay, And I'm not that's Hugh Jackman. I'm New Jackman.

617
00:30:44,200 --> 00:30:46,640
Speaker 2: And all I did was DM. They'll just say, hey, look,

618
00:30:46,640 --> 00:30:48,320
Speaker 2: I just want the and they're like, yeah, no worries,

619
00:30:48,360 --> 00:30:50,840
Speaker 2: which is great, just perfect. What else am I in

620
00:30:50,960 --> 00:30:54,560
Speaker 2: charge in charge of? I'm in charge of organizing my

621
00:30:54,760 --> 00:30:57,840
Speaker 2: friends that there, dad's and the kids. And that's the

622
00:30:57,880 --> 00:30:59,640
Speaker 2: thing when you're when you're having a party, it's like,

623
00:30:59,640 --> 00:31:01,280
Speaker 2: how do do you go on the guest list?

624
00:31:01,720 --> 00:31:04,120
Speaker 1: It's hard what's what's the capacity? What are we looking at?

625
00:31:05,320 --> 00:31:06,920
Speaker 2: What's a pop? How many people can get in there?

626
00:31:06,920 --> 00:31:10,040
Speaker 2: I'm just how many? So the invite will be on

627
00:31:10,040 --> 00:31:10,760
Speaker 2: my Facebook based.

628
00:31:13,040 --> 00:31:15,000
Speaker 1: If people would like to buy a present for Oscar,

629
00:31:15,680 --> 00:31:18,160
Speaker 1: where can they send them? I think this is great.

630
00:31:18,200 --> 00:31:20,680
Speaker 1: I'm very excited. I'm excited, and I can tell that

631
00:31:21,520 --> 00:31:24,840
Speaker 1: while your exterior is showing a little bit of discomfort frustration,

632
00:31:24,960 --> 00:31:28,160
Speaker 1: I can tell deep down there is a part of

633
00:31:28,200 --> 00:31:30,600
Speaker 1: you that's very excited to create this.

634
00:31:30,800 --> 00:31:33,520
Speaker 2: I am for Oscar. I am excited for a Saturday afternoon.

635
00:31:33,520 --> 00:31:35,200
Speaker 1: Can I help it anyway? Is anything you want to

636
00:31:35,200 --> 00:31:38,600
Speaker 1: help with? Can you leave me the responsibility of the mascot?

637
00:31:38,720 --> 00:31:39,000
Speaker 2: Yes?

638
00:31:39,360 --> 00:31:42,200
Speaker 1: Do you have a child entertainer? No? Okay, great, we

639
00:31:42,240 --> 00:31:46,120
Speaker 1: have an adult entertainment. Leave it with me. Leave it

640
00:31:46,160 --> 00:31:48,920
Speaker 1: with me, my friend. I don't want to promise anything, April,

641
00:31:49,000 --> 00:31:51,080
Speaker 1: you heard it. I don't want to promise anything, but

642
00:31:51,200 --> 00:31:53,120
Speaker 1: leave it with me. Leave it with me. I'm going

643
00:31:53,200 --> 00:31:55,920
Speaker 1: to see what I can wrangle where April.

644
00:31:55,960 --> 00:31:59,840
Speaker 2: I am most worried about April. Mainly she's like, what

645
00:32:00,160 --> 00:32:02,720
Speaker 2: no one turns up? Like that'll be a disaster, And.

646
00:32:02,680 --> 00:32:06,560
Speaker 1: It's like, don't you get a possibility. There's one person

647
00:32:06,600 --> 00:32:07,480
Speaker 1: who's going to be there.

648
00:32:08,240 --> 00:32:10,760
Speaker 2: There you go, and that is Oscar really wants is.

649
00:32:10,680 --> 00:32:14,560
Speaker 1: Maddie j He doesn't like me? Does he come to

650
00:32:14,760 --> 00:32:17,960
Speaker 1: duck me again? So actually, what I do.

651
00:32:17,960 --> 00:32:19,680
Speaker 2: Want to know is I don't know if you've got

652
00:32:19,720 --> 00:32:22,800
Speaker 2: any disaster stories, but I want and whether it's on

653
00:32:22,840 --> 00:32:25,080
Speaker 2: your face on the Facebook group or whether it's on

654
00:32:25,240 --> 00:32:29,240
Speaker 2: I might update. I might update the Facebook group with

655
00:32:29,560 --> 00:32:35,960
Speaker 2: the announcement of this and ask for disaster stories, birthday disasters.

656
00:32:36,400 --> 00:32:39,560
Speaker 1: Also, I'm going to just send that Facebook link to

657
00:32:39,640 --> 00:32:42,680
Speaker 1: all the people who criticized you previously. Ash. I'm going

658
00:32:42,720 --> 00:32:45,120
Speaker 1: to go out there and just make sure those people

659
00:32:45,160 --> 00:32:47,680
Speaker 1: who threw shade on you now. But then I guess

660
00:32:47,840 --> 00:32:49,680
Speaker 1: they'll be like, huh see I want.

661
00:32:49,880 --> 00:32:54,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, don't give it to them, still be wondering what happened?

662
00:32:54,360 --> 00:32:58,200
Speaker 1: Where is that Ash guy? This is exciting, man, I'm excited.

663
00:32:58,280 --> 00:32:58,840
Speaker 1: I'm excited.

664
00:32:59,120 --> 00:33:00,800
Speaker 2: Send a pub on a Saturay afternoon, and.

665
00:33:00,800 --> 00:33:02,840
Speaker 1: I think it's a great venue. I think a pub

666
00:33:02,920 --> 00:33:04,320
Speaker 1: is a great shot. If it's wet.

667
00:33:04,160 --> 00:33:08,960
Speaker 2: Weather inside, there's outside, You've got food there, there's heaps

668
00:33:08,960 --> 00:33:10,880
Speaker 2: of other people that don't have kids to annoy.

669
00:33:11,080 --> 00:33:13,600
Speaker 1: There's toilets. There's toilets, and then you know, if you

670
00:33:13,640 --> 00:33:15,000
Speaker 1: want to peel out, you can't peel out.

671
00:33:15,040 --> 00:33:19,440
Speaker 2: There's also like a restaurant that does food, not just beer.

672
00:33:19,680 --> 00:33:21,600
Speaker 1: Love that. So yeah, it should be good. And if

673
00:33:21,600 --> 00:33:24,160
Speaker 1: we want to kick on easy, we can stay that.

674
00:33:24,520 --> 00:33:27,600
Speaker 1: We can stay there. There's other places. I'm pumped. I'm pumped.

675
00:33:27,680 --> 00:33:32,240
Speaker 2: Great, Can I bring both kids? No, yeah you can.

676
00:33:32,520 --> 00:33:35,240
Speaker 2: We'll have enough Lolli bags for those kids. Okay, that's

677
00:33:35,280 --> 00:33:37,360
Speaker 2: another thing, trying to organize a Lolli bag that's not

678
00:33:37,360 --> 00:33:38,240
Speaker 2: for the choke hazards.

679
00:33:38,240 --> 00:33:41,760
Speaker 1: Okay, that is I think one of the hardest parts

680
00:33:41,800 --> 00:33:45,440
Speaker 1: of a kid's party is a Lolli bag and a

681
00:33:45,560 --> 00:33:46,120
Speaker 1: Tardi bag.

682
00:33:46,160 --> 00:33:47,560
Speaker 2: If you will try not to put something in there

683
00:33:47,560 --> 00:33:50,080
Speaker 2: that's going to choke a child, because that would fall

684
00:33:50,120 --> 00:33:52,840
Speaker 2: back on if you if your lollly bag choked a child,

685
00:33:52,920 --> 00:33:56,480
Speaker 2: and God for beard that child was to pass away,

686
00:33:57,320 --> 00:33:58,280
Speaker 2: you would be responsible.

687
00:33:58,360 --> 00:34:00,600
Speaker 1: Yeah. I put life saving in your pretty to go

688
00:34:00,640 --> 00:34:05,080
Speaker 1: to jail. We're all thinking it. I put life I've

689
00:34:05,080 --> 00:34:08,560
Speaker 1: seen you hole in your way too, pretty good. I

690
00:34:08,680 --> 00:34:11,640
Speaker 1: would be I would be worth quite a lot in prison.

691
00:34:11,520 --> 00:34:13,759
Speaker 2: You will be. I would be you'd be hanging onto

692
00:34:13,800 --> 00:34:15,759
Speaker 2: someone's pocket. Immediately shut up.

693
00:34:17,239 --> 00:34:19,719
Speaker 1: I put life savers in a party bag. I now

694
00:34:19,800 --> 00:34:22,960
Speaker 1: know the irony in that though three to four year

695
00:34:23,000 --> 00:34:25,000
Speaker 1: olds life savers are no.

696
00:34:24,960 --> 00:34:27,600
Speaker 2: Good, the irony in them called life savers, but they

697
00:34:27,640 --> 00:34:28,960
Speaker 2: could so easily take a chock.

698
00:34:31,239 --> 00:34:33,640
Speaker 1: I did, I did. I went to a party recently.

699
00:34:33,960 --> 00:34:36,799
Speaker 1: In the party bag. It wasn't it was a budget version,

700
00:34:36,840 --> 00:34:40,320
Speaker 1: it wasn't match Box brand. It was like the Kmart version.

701
00:34:40,440 --> 00:34:45,120
Speaker 1: Each party bag had a car, a new car. Just

702
00:34:45,160 --> 00:34:49,480
Speaker 1: why is there a BMW key in my will? It

703
00:34:49,520 --> 00:34:52,920
Speaker 1: went down very well, Yeah, no pressure. Just so is

704
00:34:52,960 --> 00:34:56,080
Speaker 1: not all lollies to have some kind of tangible gift?

705
00:34:58,040 --> 00:35:00,800
Speaker 2: Just going to plant to see you thinking with these kids,

706
00:35:00,840 --> 00:35:02,160
Speaker 2: like a calendar.

707
00:35:04,440 --> 00:35:04,920
Speaker 1: Or a book?

708
00:35:04,920 --> 00:35:06,399
Speaker 2: That's who don't need Dad's book? Question?

709
00:35:06,520 --> 00:35:11,000
Speaker 1: Free time available on pre sale. I love how every

710
00:35:11,000 --> 00:35:14,520
Speaker 1: episode we get it just quickly, ash. I don't want

711
00:35:14,520 --> 00:35:17,160
Speaker 1: to my own horn. I am a hero.

712
00:35:18,000 --> 00:35:20,399
Speaker 2: I've always said that I am a hero. You've saved

713
00:35:20,440 --> 00:35:22,640
Speaker 2: my baking in a lot of situations, so I want

714
00:35:22,680 --> 00:35:23,319
Speaker 2: to hear this one.

715
00:35:23,960 --> 00:35:27,919
Speaker 1: We were at the Entertainment Quarter on Sunday. Yes, More Park.

716
00:35:28,120 --> 00:35:30,400
Speaker 1: More Park is a suburban Sydney. By the way, people

717
00:35:30,440 --> 00:35:32,600
Speaker 1: outside of Sydney would be like, what does he mean?

718
00:35:33,080 --> 00:35:35,879
Speaker 1: Now they know there is a great park there. There

719
00:35:35,960 --> 00:35:39,160
Speaker 1: is great park, pretty new. Is it free? Free? Park?

720
00:35:39,440 --> 00:35:42,520
Speaker 1: Park is free? Parking is not free? The park is free.

721
00:35:42,640 --> 00:35:45,360
Speaker 1: They're confusing. You're with me, it's continuing confused.

722
00:35:46,920 --> 00:35:48,680
Speaker 2: Parked up the slide in my fucking car.

723
00:35:51,560 --> 00:35:55,480
Speaker 1: There was it's like a rocket ship type setup if

724
00:35:55,680 --> 00:35:58,239
Speaker 1: if you're with me, where you have to climb up

725
00:35:58,239 --> 00:36:02,120
Speaker 1: to these little chambers and then I'll show you a

726
00:36:02,200 --> 00:36:05,200
Speaker 1: video so you understand what what I'm talking about. But

727
00:36:05,400 --> 00:36:07,160
Speaker 1: it was quite hard to climb up. There wasn't like

728
00:36:07,160 --> 00:36:08,560
Speaker 1: a set of ladders. You had to climb up a

729
00:36:08,640 --> 00:36:11,560
Speaker 1: rope to get then into these chambers and then to

730
00:36:11,600 --> 00:36:13,680
Speaker 1: get to the top you had to go through little pipes,

731
00:36:14,000 --> 00:36:16,040
Speaker 1: just go up into differently and then once you're at

732
00:36:16,080 --> 00:36:18,719
Speaker 1: the top, then there's the top slide and that's how

733
00:36:18,760 --> 00:36:19,759
Speaker 1: you then go back down.

734
00:36:20,160 --> 00:36:21,399
Speaker 2: Is that the only way back down?

735
00:36:22,160 --> 00:36:24,239
Speaker 1: Or you have to come back on yourself and go

736
00:36:24,320 --> 00:36:26,439
Speaker 1: through the pipes. You have to come on and it's

737
00:36:28,719 --> 00:36:31,560
Speaker 1: but even I found it a little bit hard. You know,

738
00:36:31,560 --> 00:36:36,040
Speaker 1: obviously I'm a big guy because sorry, sorry.

739
00:36:35,800 --> 00:36:42,120
Speaker 2: Okay, big guy, what I meant.

740
00:36:42,480 --> 00:36:46,400
Speaker 1: What I meant is I'm an adult and this was degned.

741
00:36:47,960 --> 00:36:50,440
Speaker 1: But Lola wanted to go on the slide. She was like,

742
00:36:50,480 --> 00:36:52,600
Speaker 1: that looks great. She was like, Dad, come with me.

743
00:36:52,640 --> 00:36:55,520
Speaker 1: And I was like, oh, big guy, don't know if

744
00:36:55,560 --> 00:36:59,960
Speaker 1: you can tell can I go down sideways? But I thought,

745
00:37:00,080 --> 00:37:02,200
Speaker 1: you know, I'll go with it because also the slide

746
00:37:02,320 --> 00:37:05,399
Speaker 1: was pretty pretty steep as well, you know.

747
00:37:05,680 --> 00:37:08,680
Speaker 2: But you're a big guy, so for you as fu.

748
00:37:09,400 --> 00:37:13,440
Speaker 1: Okay, So I start climbing through and I'm just going

749
00:37:13,520 --> 00:37:16,719
Speaker 1: to show you what the final chamber looks like.

750
00:37:16,880 --> 00:37:21,400
Speaker 2: A final chamber, like it's some sort of torture chamber interest.

751
00:37:21,320 --> 00:37:24,080
Speaker 1: Play, my guy, Holy shit, thank you?

752
00:37:24,239 --> 00:37:25,680
Speaker 2: Is that an outdoor of bonfire?

753
00:37:26,040 --> 00:37:31,440
Speaker 1: So that's that's the chambers, right, And also they're fully

754
00:37:31,560 --> 00:37:34,759
Speaker 1: enclosed as well, so you don't know how many people

755
00:37:34,840 --> 00:37:38,080
Speaker 1: are like currently playing inside those chambers. That's a prison

756
00:37:38,080 --> 00:37:38,640
Speaker 1: for children.

757
00:37:39,360 --> 00:37:42,880
Speaker 2: That's what some almost like, great news, We've built a

758
00:37:42,880 --> 00:37:44,960
Speaker 2: prison specifically for children.

759
00:37:45,560 --> 00:37:47,840
Speaker 1: Here's what it looks like, right, So it looks impressive,

760
00:37:47,880 --> 00:37:51,240
Speaker 1: but actually, yeah, it's a child trap. So I climb

761
00:37:51,320 --> 00:37:54,040
Speaker 1: in there, I get to the top chamber. Dude, what

762
00:37:54,080 --> 00:38:00,560
Speaker 1: do I find skeleton. There's like eight kids crying up there.

763
00:38:01,120 --> 00:38:02,640
Speaker 2: Oh my god, they're stuck.

764
00:38:03,000 --> 00:38:06,600
Speaker 1: All the kids are stuck. They're all crying and they're like, Mommy, please.

765
00:38:06,880 --> 00:38:09,839
Speaker 1: No other parents noticed because it's so hard. Now other

766
00:38:09,920 --> 00:38:13,200
Speaker 1: parent's gone up there. So I'm found myself with all

767
00:38:13,200 --> 00:38:19,480
Speaker 1: these kids, and I'm like, don't worry everybody. So I'm like,

768
00:38:19,520 --> 00:38:22,040
Speaker 1: all right, who's first. I imagine this is what it

769
00:38:22,080 --> 00:38:25,080
Speaker 1: would have felt like being one of the rescuers from

770
00:38:25,160 --> 00:38:28,960
Speaker 1: the tie cave situation, being face to face with all

771
00:38:29,000 --> 00:38:33,840
Speaker 1: these kids in a life threatening situation, a live threatening situation,

772
00:38:34,000 --> 00:38:38,600
Speaker 1: waiting for the tide to come in. So I'm all

773
00:38:38,600 --> 00:38:41,120
Speaker 1: of a sudden, I'm directing these kids down the slide,

774
00:38:41,160 --> 00:38:44,560
Speaker 1: which is very steep, and they're all pretty scared. Don't

775
00:38:44,600 --> 00:38:49,839
Speaker 1: worry I start sedating the kids. I didn't. I didn't.

776
00:38:50,200 --> 00:38:52,560
Speaker 1: I was wondering, like, go backwards, if you're scared, go

777
00:38:52,640 --> 00:38:57,480
Speaker 1: back to close your eyes, timmy, and I start. All

778
00:38:57,520 --> 00:39:00,960
Speaker 1: these kids are going down. Then finally it's low. It's myself.

779
00:39:01,160 --> 00:39:03,839
Speaker 1: She goes down first. I go down afterwards, and I'm

780
00:39:03,880 --> 00:39:06,080
Speaker 1: coming down this slide and I'm just wondering to myself,

781
00:39:06,120 --> 00:39:08,640
Speaker 1: what kind of reaction, will I get you know, these

782
00:39:08,680 --> 00:39:11,200
Speaker 1: parents must have been worried, sick. Where the hell's Timmy?

783
00:39:11,400 --> 00:39:12,200
Speaker 1: Where are my kids?

784
00:39:12,760 --> 00:39:13,040
Speaker 2: No one?

785
00:39:13,560 --> 00:39:16,440
Speaker 3: No one knows nothing.

786
00:39:16,680 --> 00:39:19,839
Speaker 2: Parenting is a thankless chore, my friend.

787
00:39:19,800 --> 00:39:22,240
Speaker 1: I don't know how long these kids have been up there, days, weeks.

788
00:39:22,280 --> 00:39:24,960
Speaker 2: Perhaps that story reminds me of have you seen the

789
00:39:25,000 --> 00:39:25,840
Speaker 2: opening of Trolls?

790
00:39:26,280 --> 00:39:31,799
Speaker 1: Yes? No, and he comes down with his daughter. I

791
00:39:31,840 --> 00:39:33,960
Speaker 1: get nothing. I don't do this for the pat on

792
00:39:34,000 --> 00:39:36,279
Speaker 1: the back afterwards. But you're looking for it?

793
00:39:36,320 --> 00:39:36,480
Speaker 2: Now?

794
00:39:36,520 --> 00:39:39,239
Speaker 1: Are you not a single bit of repig you're looking

795
00:39:39,280 --> 00:39:45,440
Speaker 1: for it? Did you come down like, yeah, I got nothing?

796
00:39:46,080 --> 00:39:48,640
Speaker 2: You know what? Well done, sir, Thank you.

797
00:39:48,880 --> 00:39:50,520
Speaker 1: A lesser man would have gone.

798
00:39:50,920 --> 00:39:51,720
Speaker 2: Not my problem.

799
00:39:51,880 --> 00:39:54,560
Speaker 1: That lesser man would have been me. Again, I don't

800
00:39:54,600 --> 00:39:56,640
Speaker 1: do this to hear those words spoken about me.

801
00:39:56,760 --> 00:39:57,719
Speaker 2: Because they're appreciated.

802
00:39:57,920 --> 00:39:58,279
Speaker 1: Thank you.

803
00:39:58,440 --> 00:40:02,640
Speaker 2: Speaking of praise, let's go into our favorite segment, which

804
00:40:02,719 --> 00:40:09,080
Speaker 2: is heady couple, Welcome down the street, petty couple.

805
00:40:09,920 --> 00:40:15,400
Speaker 1: They kind of like with me, dirty couple. I love you,

806
00:40:15,560 --> 00:40:21,000
Speaker 1: but immiture, no one can push me quite like you.

807
00:40:23,719 --> 00:40:30,840
Speaker 1: Ash first one here is from t J. Spelt Te Space.

808
00:40:31,280 --> 00:40:33,320
Speaker 2: Do not know there's a quicker way to spell that.

809
00:40:33,640 --> 00:40:36,160
Speaker 1: I love words. Marley's learning how to spell right now,

810
00:40:36,440 --> 00:40:41,200
Speaker 1: words like TJ. They're fantastic, very easy, very easy for

811
00:40:41,400 --> 00:40:46,200
Speaker 1: young minds. It's just two letters, well said. TJ says.

812
00:40:46,640 --> 00:40:49,000
Speaker 1: My husband did one of the few loads of washing

813
00:40:49,040 --> 00:40:52,560
Speaker 1: he's ever done and hung it on the line. Well done,

814
00:40:52,600 --> 00:40:55,680
Speaker 1: well done. Round of applause. That's great, bar so low,

815
00:40:55,760 --> 00:40:58,560
Speaker 1: that's so good. Good to see him doing his fair share.

816
00:40:59,280 --> 00:41:02,480
Speaker 1: Not fair share? Is it? He's on the road, it is,

817
00:41:04,000 --> 00:41:06,080
Speaker 1: She says. I noticed it was still in the line

818
00:41:06,080 --> 00:41:08,319
Speaker 1: the next day and reminded him to bring it in.

819
00:41:08,560 --> 00:41:11,480
Speaker 1: The reminders continued over the next couple of days. Those

820
00:41:11,560 --> 00:41:17,600
Speaker 1: clothes and towers remained on the line days, she says. Heah,

821
00:41:17,600 --> 00:41:21,040
Speaker 1: And I don't know if she's embellishing the story, TJ. TJ.

822
00:41:21,080 --> 00:41:23,359
Speaker 1: I don't want to call you a liar, but this

823
00:41:23,440 --> 00:41:25,680
Speaker 1: is this is a bit far fit, she's saying. Cut

824
00:41:25,719 --> 00:41:30,120
Speaker 1: to ten months later. No, ten months. They weren't out

825
00:41:30,120 --> 00:41:32,359
Speaker 1: there for ten months, that's what she's saying. TJ says.

826
00:41:32,360 --> 00:41:35,239
Speaker 1: It must be true. He finally took them off the

827
00:41:35,239 --> 00:41:39,439
Speaker 1: line ten months later. She says, I looked at them

828
00:41:39,560 --> 00:41:44,200
Speaker 1: every single day out of sheer pettiness, I refuse to

829
00:41:44,280 --> 00:41:47,080
Speaker 1: bring them in. TJ. You've done the right thing here,

830
00:41:48,120 --> 00:41:50,719
Speaker 1: You've done the right thing ten months.

831
00:41:51,239 --> 00:41:58,960
Speaker 2: That's more than a pregnancy. Oh that's pretty petty.

832
00:41:59,120 --> 00:42:00,439
Speaker 1: TJ say.

833
00:42:01,200 --> 00:42:03,719
Speaker 2: They're probably his clothes too, Like, that's probably why she's

834
00:42:03,760 --> 00:42:05,600
Speaker 2: left it, if it was anything important of hers.

835
00:42:05,680 --> 00:42:09,120
Speaker 1: I guarantee you TJ's got that off. Also, like the

836
00:42:09,160 --> 00:42:11,120
Speaker 1: one time he finally does the washing, he just does

837
00:42:11,160 --> 00:42:12,160
Speaker 1: his clothes and not hers.

838
00:42:13,080 --> 00:42:17,160
Speaker 2: So who's the pew on air, Matt, I've got one

839
00:42:17,600 --> 00:42:18,960
Speaker 2: from Gemma.

840
00:42:19,239 --> 00:42:22,000
Speaker 1: Jemma says sharing a bathroom.

841
00:42:21,520 --> 00:42:25,600
Speaker 2: With my husband is so annoying. Separate bathrooms.

842
00:42:25,600 --> 00:42:25,920
Speaker 1: I'm with you.

843
00:42:26,920 --> 00:42:30,000
Speaker 2: If he shakes too vigorously and sprays his piss.

844
00:42:29,719 --> 00:42:38,680
Speaker 1: On the floor, I use his towel. No. Oh.

845
00:42:38,719 --> 00:42:41,640
Speaker 2: She also goes under say the same applies if he

846
00:42:41,640 --> 00:42:44,279
Speaker 2: gets water all over the floor because he's incapable of

847
00:42:44,360 --> 00:42:45,680
Speaker 2: using a bath mat properly.

848
00:42:46,680 --> 00:42:49,960
Speaker 1: Oh my, so it still goes.

849
00:42:50,600 --> 00:42:53,680
Speaker 2: She then says, sometimes I watch him drying his face

850
00:42:53,760 --> 00:42:57,880
Speaker 2: and creep, but you've got to kiss that face.

851
00:42:58,320 --> 00:43:01,600
Speaker 1: She don't have to, bro she doesn't have to. I

852
00:43:01,680 --> 00:43:02,560
Speaker 1: hope he's not listening.

853
00:43:03,040 --> 00:43:04,680
Speaker 3: He's got to get his four skin checked and it's

854
00:43:04,719 --> 00:43:08,600
Speaker 3: not his problem. He's got a six skin. That's great

855
00:43:08,680 --> 00:43:10,359
Speaker 3: and I love them. Keep them coming in.

856
00:43:10,520 --> 00:43:10,840
Speaker 1: Wow.

857
00:43:11,440 --> 00:43:13,719
Speaker 2: You can send them to hello at two Doting dads

858
00:43:13,719 --> 00:43:16,360
Speaker 2: dot com, or you can DM two Doting Dad's the

859
00:43:16,440 --> 00:43:18,120
Speaker 2: Instagram page and we.

860
00:43:18,200 --> 00:43:20,160
Speaker 1: Will try and it around to all of them. There

861
00:43:20,160 --> 00:43:21,000
Speaker 1: are lots.

862
00:43:20,719 --> 00:43:23,280
Speaker 2: Because people are out there being petty makes the days

863
00:43:23,280 --> 00:43:23,680
Speaker 2: go by.

864
00:43:23,960 --> 00:43:28,000
Speaker 1: I love how all these men are just completely oblivious

865
00:43:28,520 --> 00:43:32,640
Speaker 1: to what's happening around them, wiping their face, like town

866
00:43:32,719 --> 00:43:36,800
Speaker 1: smells a bit weird. Why does my towel smell pissy? Anyway? Anyway,

867
00:43:36,840 --> 00:43:40,200
Speaker 1: it must be me questions, Ash, Yes, questions. We do

868
00:43:40,280 --> 00:43:42,880
Speaker 1: have a question. Last episode, I think it was we

869
00:43:43,120 --> 00:43:45,680
Speaker 1: told a story about a friend of mine who bit

870
00:43:45,760 --> 00:43:48,800
Speaker 1: their kid as a way to tearing them. You're careful

871
00:43:49,400 --> 00:43:51,640
Speaker 1: not to say that we're advocating for parents to bite

872
00:43:51,680 --> 00:43:55,400
Speaker 1: their own kids. Holy shit. It was an outpouring of

873
00:43:55,480 --> 00:43:59,319
Speaker 1: parents being like, I'm a barter. They're everyone's not. Your

874
00:43:59,360 --> 00:44:01,200
Speaker 1: kids are biting. They're probably just like, that's what we're

875
00:44:01,200 --> 00:44:04,879
Speaker 1: supposed to do. Everyone's biting and it is the most

876
00:44:04,920 --> 00:44:06,960
Speaker 1: effective way, according to the people that have reached out

877
00:44:07,000 --> 00:44:09,320
Speaker 1: to us, to stop the kids from biting other kids.

878
00:44:09,800 --> 00:44:12,239
Speaker 1: And even people were saying I was a bier as

879
00:44:12,280 --> 00:44:15,200
Speaker 1: a kid and I got bit by my parent. I

880
00:44:15,280 --> 00:44:18,560
Speaker 1: no longer bit. So once again, we're not advocating for this.

881
00:44:18,719 --> 00:44:20,279
Speaker 1: We're just saying that there's a lot of people out

882
00:44:20,320 --> 00:44:23,600
Speaker 1: there that say, as parents, it works, as kids getting

883
00:44:23,600 --> 00:44:25,240
Speaker 1: bit by their parents also worked.

884
00:44:25,560 --> 00:44:26,440
Speaker 2: That's crazy for.

885
00:44:26,360 --> 00:44:28,040
Speaker 1: Everyone who reached out. We want to say thank you.

886
00:44:28,280 --> 00:44:33,120
Speaker 1: I have a taste and let us question here is

887
00:44:33,160 --> 00:44:38,879
Speaker 1: from Rhonda. Ronda asks Ash, when you're giving your kids

888
00:44:38,880 --> 00:44:41,960
Speaker 1: a bath at night time, what do you do if

889
00:44:41,960 --> 00:44:44,400
Speaker 1: they we in the bath? Do you change the bathwater

890
00:44:44,560 --> 00:44:47,000
Speaker 1: or do you just push on, push on.

891
00:44:49,360 --> 00:44:53,560
Speaker 2: Nice words there. I definitely depends on how yellow it is,

892
00:44:54,160 --> 00:44:57,399
Speaker 2: because if I can't see it, I don't know it's there.

893
00:44:58,239 --> 00:45:01,319
Speaker 2: But the other day I said to Scar, do we

894
00:45:01,600 --> 00:45:04,480
Speaker 2: get in the bath because I don't need to shares

895
00:45:04,480 --> 00:45:05,759
Speaker 2: a bath with his sister.

896
00:45:05,640 --> 00:45:07,920
Speaker 1: And especially now when it's a bit colder. As soon

897
00:45:07,960 --> 00:45:10,399
Speaker 1: as they hit that warm water floodgates open.

898
00:45:10,520 --> 00:45:14,719
Speaker 2: He and he was so dear high and I was like,

899
00:45:15,920 --> 00:45:20,000
Speaker 2: get over and had to redo the whole bath again. Subsequently,

900
00:45:20,200 --> 00:45:22,480
Speaker 2: we only have a small hot water heater at our house.

901
00:45:22,520 --> 00:45:24,800
Speaker 1: So both April and I ended up with cold showers.

902
00:45:24,920 --> 00:45:27,680
Speaker 1: Oh no, she was not very happy. What is it

903
00:45:27,719 --> 00:45:31,200
Speaker 1: with kids? They like my kids. They've now got a

904
00:45:31,280 --> 00:45:34,399
Speaker 1: taste of pissing in the bath and they prefer that

905
00:45:34,400 --> 00:45:37,799
Speaker 1: than pissing in the toilets. Every time. I'm like, before

906
00:45:37,840 --> 00:45:40,240
Speaker 1: you get in the bath, do are we on the potty?

907
00:45:40,400 --> 00:45:42,800
Speaker 1: And they're like, no, no, are we in there? And

908
00:45:43,600 --> 00:45:48,000
Speaker 1: I'm it's like they will fight. They will fight me

909
00:45:48,280 --> 00:45:50,520
Speaker 1: to not wei on the potty. I'm like trying to

910
00:45:50,560 --> 00:45:52,640
Speaker 1: force them on. So I'm like, hey, fine, But then

911
00:45:52,680 --> 00:45:55,200
Speaker 1: they want to drink the bath water. Yeah, freak, that's

912
00:45:55,239 --> 00:45:58,760
Speaker 1: what they've got, this taste now, the taste for urine.

913
00:45:58,880 --> 00:46:01,160
Speaker 2: What is wrong with you? You see ships in the bath?

914
00:46:02,960 --> 00:46:05,919
Speaker 2: I've set your photos of that ship, which I get

915
00:46:05,920 --> 00:46:10,000
Speaker 2: about immediately. Immediately you change the bath water then or

916
00:46:10,280 --> 00:46:14,760
Speaker 2: baths over. Dad's going to fish out of the drain

917
00:46:14,880 --> 00:46:18,399
Speaker 2: that bath is well and truly, because then I've got

918
00:46:18,400 --> 00:46:19,840
Speaker 2: to like disinfect the bath.

919
00:46:21,360 --> 00:46:24,719
Speaker 1: I didn't think you would. I wouldn't April make it?

920
00:46:27,760 --> 00:46:30,239
Speaker 1: What about you? Do you push on through? Yeah? Yeah,

921
00:46:30,440 --> 00:46:34,640
Speaker 1: always always would. It would have to be like acid

922
00:46:35,320 --> 00:46:38,239
Speaker 1: coming out of their body for me to change the

923
00:46:38,280 --> 00:46:41,239
Speaker 1: bath water. I'm like, man, that's wild. That's good to go.

924
00:46:41,400 --> 00:46:44,200
Speaker 1: You guys are fine. You won't notice. That's a lot

925
00:46:44,200 --> 00:46:46,040
Speaker 1: of water, Matt.

926
00:46:46,120 --> 00:46:49,360
Speaker 2: This one's from Sam. What do you tell your kids

927
00:46:49,440 --> 00:46:54,160
Speaker 2: when they ask you how babies get inside mummy's belly?

928
00:46:54,880 --> 00:46:55,840
Speaker 1: Well, that's a good question.

929
00:46:57,000 --> 00:46:59,439
Speaker 2: We want to turn it back on them to see

930
00:46:59,440 --> 00:47:00,000
Speaker 2: how they.

931
00:47:00,040 --> 00:47:01,799
Speaker 1: Think the baby got in the belly. What do your

932
00:47:01,840 --> 00:47:02,320
Speaker 1: kids saying?

933
00:47:02,320 --> 00:47:05,000
Speaker 2: Whatever they say, I just say that that's the answer.

934
00:47:05,640 --> 00:47:09,400
Speaker 1: I've always been pretty upfront, pretty transparent with my kids,

935
00:47:09,480 --> 00:47:11,759
Speaker 1: and it's funny you ask. I've got a tape here.

936
00:47:13,920 --> 00:47:17,400
Speaker 1: I say that you're always babies are in mummy's tummy.

937
00:47:18,280 --> 00:47:20,879
Speaker 1: But when it comes to explaining the intricacies of how

938
00:47:20,920 --> 00:47:24,479
Speaker 1: they got in there, I'm like, go ask your mother.

939
00:47:26,280 --> 00:47:31,360
Speaker 1: I just say, when you love someone very much, you

940
00:47:31,440 --> 00:47:36,879
Speaker 1: cuddle a little. Always the case, though I don't don't.

941
00:47:37,000 --> 00:47:38,520
Speaker 2: Sorry to those single mums out there.

942
00:47:38,800 --> 00:47:42,799
Speaker 1: I don't say I don't say specifically how good in there?

943
00:47:42,800 --> 00:47:44,880
Speaker 1: But I just say that when mum and dad, as

944
00:47:45,000 --> 00:47:46,960
Speaker 1: me and Laura, when we loved each other very much,

945
00:47:47,120 --> 00:47:51,360
Speaker 1: that's how the baby happened. End of good night, and

946
00:47:52,040 --> 00:47:52,799
Speaker 1: let's get out of here.

947
00:47:53,080 --> 00:47:53,879
Speaker 2: Let them figure it out.

948
00:47:54,000 --> 00:47:57,279
Speaker 1: I don't think. I mean, I do think laambled my

949
00:47:57,320 --> 00:48:00,960
Speaker 1: way through it. I do think did she no? Maybe

950
00:48:01,000 --> 00:48:04,600
Speaker 1: not thinking if she said to them they come out

951
00:48:04,600 --> 00:48:07,320
Speaker 1: the vagina. Hmm, that's what they come out of. Know

952
00:48:07,360 --> 00:48:10,200
Speaker 1: how they got in there? No, well, actually that's not true.

953
00:48:10,600 --> 00:48:14,080
Speaker 1: It's both true. I don't think she did. I don't

954
00:48:14,160 --> 00:48:17,400
Speaker 1: quote me on this. I do have this memory of like,

955
00:48:18,200 --> 00:48:20,719
Speaker 1: that's where babies come out from. I think, Okay, this

956
00:48:20,800 --> 00:48:24,160
Speaker 1: is for getting deep and dark. It's a lot for

957
00:48:24,200 --> 00:48:26,120
Speaker 1: the young mind of a four year old to comprehend.

958
00:48:26,320 --> 00:48:28,920
Speaker 1: So I think all that Marley cares about is that

959
00:48:28,920 --> 00:48:31,920
Speaker 1: the baby's inside the tummy. She's not really pushing hard

960
00:48:32,040 --> 00:48:35,279
Speaker 1: for direct answers of like tell me, now, how did

961
00:48:35,280 --> 00:48:38,120
Speaker 1: it get in there? She's looking for a specific anatomy. Yeah. Yeah,

962
00:48:38,120 --> 00:48:40,239
Speaker 1: we're just like it's in there, like, eh, fair enough,

963
00:48:40,280 --> 00:48:42,160
Speaker 1: fair enough, it's in there, then it's not. So we'll

964
00:48:42,239 --> 00:48:45,120
Speaker 1: just park that for now, for now, until she's a

965
00:48:45,120 --> 00:48:49,520
Speaker 1: bit older, yes, and until the kids start asking specific questions.

966
00:48:50,000 --> 00:48:51,840
Speaker 1: Then I'll start to lighter them more.

967
00:48:53,200 --> 00:48:56,600
Speaker 2: Perfect. That sounds like a really good plan. That sounds

968
00:48:56,680 --> 00:48:59,040
Speaker 2: that actually is something I would love to do. Just

969
00:48:59,120 --> 00:48:59,560
Speaker 2: laugh at them.

970
00:48:59,560 --> 00:49:02,759
Speaker 1: About it. I have this weird memory sometimes it's just

971
00:49:02,800 --> 00:49:06,000
Speaker 1: strange how one particular moment sticks out in your mind.

972
00:49:06,080 --> 00:49:08,880
Speaker 1: And I remember, I think I was grade five. I'm listening.

973
00:49:08,960 --> 00:49:12,080
Speaker 1: His name was Kieren, and I don't remember how he

974
00:49:12,120 --> 00:49:14,040
Speaker 1: was using it, but he was using the word stiffy,

975
00:49:15,440 --> 00:49:19,719
Speaker 1: and I was like, stiffy. You say, what is it?

976
00:49:19,760 --> 00:49:21,279
Speaker 1: What is a stiffy? And he was like, you don't

977
00:49:21,320 --> 00:49:23,279
Speaker 1: know what a stiffy? He had older brothers, Yeah, he

978
00:49:23,400 --> 00:49:26,560
Speaker 1: was like yeah. And I went to my brother and

979
00:49:26,600 --> 00:49:28,719
Speaker 1: I was like, what's the stiffy? And he was like.

980
00:49:29,320 --> 00:49:30,840
Speaker 1: My brother was like, you don't know what a stiff

981
00:49:30,840 --> 00:49:33,560
Speaker 1: he is. Maybe he didn't know, but he was like,

982
00:49:33,600 --> 00:49:36,719
Speaker 1: I'm not telling you, bro. Yeah. So I went to

983
00:49:36,800 --> 00:49:38,400
Speaker 1: mum and I was like, what's a stiffy? She wouldn't

984
00:49:38,440 --> 00:49:41,440
Speaker 1: tell me. That's just wrong, thank you? Do you know?

985
00:49:41,719 --> 00:49:43,280
Speaker 1: I was recapping one.

986
00:49:43,160 --> 00:49:45,040
Speaker 2: Of the worst conversations I ever had with my mum,

987
00:49:45,520 --> 00:49:47,600
Speaker 2: and that was her explained to me what an orgasm is.

988
00:49:48,040 --> 00:49:49,080
Speaker 1: How old were we twelve?

989
00:49:52,040 --> 00:49:53,000
Speaker 2: It makes so much.

990
00:49:52,840 --> 00:49:55,080
Speaker 1: Sense now, doesn't that I did.

991
00:49:55,120 --> 00:49:57,319
Speaker 2: We just have this school near us called Sant Augustine's

992
00:49:57,400 --> 00:49:59,719
Speaker 2: and the nickname for it was Santa orgasms, and I

993
00:49:59,760 --> 00:50:01,839
Speaker 2: was like, we'll say orgasms.

994
00:50:01,280 --> 00:50:03,040
Speaker 1: Like some of the boys again to an orgasms. She

995
00:50:03,080 --> 00:50:04,440
Speaker 1: was like, would you like to know what orgasms?

996
00:50:04,480 --> 00:50:08,160
Speaker 2: I'm like no, and she she went on to try

997
00:50:08,200 --> 00:50:10,120
Speaker 2: and explain it to me, but I was like, like,

998
00:50:10,440 --> 00:50:11,240
Speaker 2: so distraught.

999
00:50:11,719 --> 00:50:16,160
Speaker 1: Good on her, Good on her? Anyway? Did you call

1000
00:50:16,200 --> 00:50:19,560
Speaker 1: it orgasms? Following that, never, I never used the word

1001
00:50:19,560 --> 00:50:23,160
Speaker 1: ever again, genius missus Wicks. We'll play anyway. That's all

1002
00:50:23,160 --> 00:50:24,960
Speaker 1: we got time for. The builders need to get back

1003
00:50:24,960 --> 00:50:28,279
Speaker 1: to work. We need to get out of here, get

1004
00:50:28,320 --> 00:50:31,759
Speaker 1: back to They're all currently waiting like we had to

1005
00:50:31,800 --> 00:50:34,960
Speaker 1: come to the house of a podcaster. Yeah, waiting for

1006
00:50:34,960 --> 00:50:36,759
Speaker 1: me to give them the signal extra line back on

1007
00:50:36,800 --> 00:50:41,759
Speaker 1: the tools. Boys get who wants some tea and lemonade?

1008
00:50:42,520 --> 00:50:44,680
Speaker 1: I have to get them drinks at one thirty No,

1009
00:50:44,840 --> 00:50:47,920
Speaker 1: I promised them, Well, they can have big it's the

1010
00:50:47,960 --> 00:50:49,279
Speaker 1: biggies some lemonade.

1011
00:50:49,560 --> 00:50:52,560
Speaker 2: If you've enjoyed this episode, please share it with someone

1012
00:50:52,560 --> 00:50:55,080
Speaker 2: who needs a laugh parent and non parent definitely not

1013
00:50:55,120 --> 00:50:58,360
Speaker 2: a pet parent, otherwise we'll find out and leave us

1014
00:50:58,360 --> 00:50:59,719
Speaker 2: to review and subscribe as well.

1015
00:50:59,800 --> 00:51:04,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, subscribe review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify watch us

1016
00:51:04,040 --> 00:51:09,040
Speaker 1: some shorts. Yeah whatever, do whatever, and yeah, if you

1017
00:51:09,040 --> 00:51:11,279
Speaker 1: have any advice for Ash's party, please send it up

1018
00:51:11,280 --> 00:51:13,440
Speaker 1: away because we want to make sure it's the Bash

1019
00:51:13,520 --> 00:51:15,440
Speaker 1: of the year. Yes, and don't forget.

1020
00:51:15,520 --> 00:51:18,080
Speaker 2: If you want to win this case of Stonewood, follow

1021
00:51:18,320 --> 00:51:19,400
Speaker 2: whatever Mat said earlier.

1022
00:51:19,719 --> 00:51:22,000
Speaker 1: Go back and listen to it again from the start.

1023
00:51:22,160 --> 00:51:31,840
Speaker 1: All right, sir, back two. Doting Dad's podcast acknowledges the

1024
00:51:31,840 --> 00:51:35,800
Speaker 1: traditional custodians of country throughout Australia and the connections to land,

1025
00:51:35,960 --> 00:51:37,160
Speaker 1: see and community.

1026
00:51:37,360 --> 00:51:39,920
Speaker 2: We pay our respects to their elders past and present

1027
00:51:39,960 --> 00:51:42,719
Speaker 2: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Straight

1028
00:51:42,760 --> 00:51:46,719
Speaker 2: Islander people's today. This episode was recorded on Gadagle Land