Speaker 1: All right, I think my cat is broken. Your cat
Speaker 1: has broken. It's only new though, Yeah, take it back.
Speaker 1: You got a receipt. Do you get a receipt when
Speaker 1: you buy a cat? I think you have like an
Speaker 1: electronic type recording of the fact that we own it.
Speaker 1: It may have a chip, not sure. But the way
Speaker 1: it's broken is that what flavor Jesus Christ. The way
Speaker 1: that it's broken is used to keep jumping up on
Speaker 1: the tabletop. And I have a little sprayer that Laura
Speaker 1: would use for the plants and I would use it
Speaker 1: on the cat to get it down. And then now
Speaker 1: I sprayed it and it just sat there laughs, and
Speaker 1: I expected it again. It stared at me. It's like,
Speaker 1: do it again, and I was eight times. The cat
Speaker 1: was drenched. Welcome back to two Noting dads. I am
Speaker 1: Mattie Jay. This is a podcast all about parenting. It
Speaker 1: is the good, it is the bad. And if you
Speaker 1: have come winning any type of advice, steer clear my child,
Speaker 1: not us, not today, not today, not ever.
Speaker 2: I insisted today that we drink my favorite drop for
Speaker 2: a change.
Speaker 1: I'm not upset about this at all.
Speaker 2: That yeah, because we don't we often quite go with
Speaker 2: the Pacific Our, which is delightful. But I'm a big
Speaker 2: fan of that, but I'm a bigger fan of this.
Speaker 2: It's the cloudy pale owl from stone Wood.
Speaker 1: They call it a modern Paleol's so modern about it?
Speaker 1: I don't know, but they say it's it's tropical. It's
Speaker 1: got fruit, a roamas, a smooth mouth feel, and low bitterness.
Speaker 1: Laura actually prefers this one of all the stone Wood drinks.
Speaker 1: It's a favorite.
Speaker 2: You go, Let's go chicks always for making this episode possible.
Speaker 1: Oh that's good. It's very delicious. Yeah, dude, I was
Speaker 1: drinking this on the weekend and Laura was like, do
Speaker 1: you know what I feel like a beer? I was like, hey,
Speaker 1: I'll get your beer, don't touch more one. But it
Speaker 1: was normally she likes the wine, but she was like,
Speaker 1: this is really good. I'm like, yeah, I've been saying
Speaker 1: that for the last six Maybe they should. A weird
Speaker 1: thing happened to me.
Speaker 2: That's exactly how I want you to start every sentence
Speaker 2: when you talk to me.
Speaker 1: You know what I am here for. I like to
Speaker 1: be a good Samaritan. Allegedly, yes, I like to help people, allegedly. Yes.
Speaker 1: It feels good. Allegedly, I enjoy it. Allegedly I was anything.
Speaker 1: I was driving in North Sydney. I was at the
Speaker 1: lights and a car drove in front of me and
Speaker 1: I thought to myself, that doesn't look right. Car driving
Speaker 1: on the road. Let me explain. It was an elderly man.
Speaker 1: It was a blue Mercedes full drive. Everything seems normal.
Speaker 1: So far, so far normal, except in the side mirror
Speaker 1: of the driver's side there was a walking stick hanging
Speaker 1: on the side mirror. And he drove past quite slowly
Speaker 1: and he must have just caught the end of like
Speaker 1: an amber light, so he went in front of me.
Speaker 1: My light turned green. All of a sudden, I'm behind him.
Speaker 1: I drove up. It was a couple of lanes of traffic,
Speaker 1: so I drove up next to him because he's in
Speaker 1: the middle, and I was like, I'm gonna I'm going
Speaker 1: to help this guy out. You know, sometimes you see
Speaker 1: someone with like they've left something on the top of
Speaker 1: the car, and you see videos of you know, someone's
Speaker 1: left their phone on the car and they're like, oh,
Speaker 1: you know, they have no idea. And then I realized,
Speaker 1: like it's hard to explain to someone what's happening. And
Speaker 1: it's hard to explain, like I'm beating my horn and
Speaker 1: I pull up next to him, and he thought that
Speaker 1: I was like having aggressive I'd go at him for
Speaker 1: like going through the amber light. I'm trying to I'm
Speaker 1: pointing to out going the walking stick, the walking stick,
Speaker 1: and he's like, what you call me? He was like
Speaker 1: fuck you? Oh? Really? Yeah? He thought I was having
Speaker 1: a go, And so did you get out and help
Speaker 1: him out? Or that was it? So I thought to myself, Ash,
Speaker 1: what do I do here? What do I do? That's
Speaker 1: what I thought, And I said that's not that's not
Speaker 1: the helpful way. I said, This opportunity to help someone
Speaker 1: else is getting away from me. Didn't So I thought
Speaker 1: I'll give it one last crack next red light. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm behind him now, And so I thought, this is
Speaker 1: a lot, this is a lot. I'm going to hop
Speaker 1: out of my car. Did I see you in the news.
Speaker 1: So I hop out of my car, put the handbrake
Speaker 1: on when I come out and it's knock on his
Speaker 1: I knock on his window. Yeah, So, like, was he shocked?
Speaker 1: Was he spooked? He did not. He didn't want anything
Speaker 1: to do with it. He thought I was he I
Speaker 1: was saying, you've got because he was really old. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so he must have been hard of hearing. He was
Speaker 1: petrified and he didn't what he was like, did the
Speaker 1: stair through? Yeah, And I was saying, you're walking stick,
Speaker 1: you've got your walking stick, and I was I was
Speaker 1: going to grab it, and I was like, so you
Speaker 1: just left it? Yeah? Yeah, because I also I was
Speaker 1: I was this confrontation. You're very confrontational. You've probably had
Speaker 1: this face on you. You're like, must help, must help
Speaker 1: this man, beads of sweat coming down. I am the
Speaker 1: least threat looking person that you'll ever come across.
Speaker 2: You can keep telling yourself that, but by the sounds
Speaker 2: of things, you really gave that old man a fright.
Speaker 1: I wouldn't be surprised if he's still with it. I was.
Speaker 1: I was prepared to stop at no length to help
Speaker 1: this poor old man. He didn't clearly didn't want your hell.
Speaker 2: Heine, you're telling this story of heroic. He's probably got
Speaker 2: his family side of bed at the hospital because he's
Speaker 2: in shock telling this story of how he was ambushed.
Speaker 2: Blay a young man. He was crazed. I say, do
Speaker 2: you know what I.
Speaker 1: Really what I was really upset about he wouldn't let
Speaker 1: you help him. He I just I wanted to have
Speaker 1: that moment of like thank you, thank you, and I
Speaker 1: didn't get it. It was like I had like blue balls.
Speaker 1: You got to close the loop.
Speaker 2: They say, traumatized him for the rest of what would
Speaker 2: I would say, his short life.
Speaker 1: I kept beeping him across the bridge. You're fucking walking.
Speaker 1: It's like, what do you call me?
Speaker 2: Anyway, April was a sort of per when she sees
Speaker 2: an old person, like at a bus stop, she cries
Speaker 2: and I'm like, why.
Speaker 1: These poor people are so confused? I know, why are
Speaker 1: you crying? It's just like it's so sad. What's sad
Speaker 1: about it? They were catching a bush? Very good man.
Speaker 1: I wanted to ask you a question.
Speaker 2: April went to a park with both kids the other
Speaker 2: day and there was someone in the park that was
Speaker 2: actually just this weird guy in the park, and April.
Speaker 1: Was like, what was weird about him? He was alone
Speaker 1: in the kids park, a man. I don't know if
Speaker 1: he was.
Speaker 2: I wasn't there, but the story I got was they
Speaker 2: walked into the park. I didn't really think anything of it,
Speaker 2: and then realized that this guy's not with not with
Speaker 2: any kids, and April was referring to him as the
Speaker 2: weirdo in the park. April was like to Oscar A Mazy,
Speaker 2: He's like, oh, we better go. There's like a weirdo
Speaker 2: in the park. Weirdo in the park. It's not really
Speaker 2: going to help anybody. But the kids were like, weirdo,
Speaker 2: who's the.
Speaker 1: Weird stranger danger? Is that?
Speaker 2: Well, That's what I'm trying to get at. Both of
Speaker 2: our kids now are a sort of five ish, just
Speaker 2: about hit.
Speaker 1: Five and three for Lola, and.
Speaker 2: They're sort of at the age where they could walk
Speaker 2: away from you, whether at the park or the shops.
Speaker 1: But I wanted to ask about when do you teach
Speaker 1: stranger danger. It's really hard, isn't it. It's hard because
Speaker 1: there's mixed messaging. YEP. On the one hand, you're like, hey,
Speaker 1: don't talk to any strangers, But on the other hand,
Speaker 1: we're constantly coming in contact with all sorts of people
Speaker 1: who Marley and Lawla are meeting for the first time,
Speaker 1: and we're like, hey, look, yeah to them, they are strangers. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's a bit of a weird one. And so we
Speaker 1: also have had a situation where it was an elderly
Speaker 1: lady once at the beach and we're on a park
Speaker 1: bench getting sunscreen on the kids, and she was just like, oh,
Speaker 1: you've got really cute kids, and we were like, thank
Speaker 1: you very much, and she was like, on Lola's who
Speaker 1: you know was Lola. She went to Lola and was like, oh,
Speaker 1: she is like just so gorgeous, and we're like, thank you,
Speaker 1: and then she picked her up. What. I didn't go anywhere,
Speaker 1: but she just like, I don't know, it just happened.
Speaker 1: It was almost in slow motion, and I was like,
Speaker 1: don't pick my kid up.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I was kind of had like an accomplished next
Speaker 2: we're going run.
Speaker 1: And then she kind of Lola. You know, Lola hates
Speaker 1: everyone who's not Laura. So Lola was like, we didn't
Speaker 1: have to teach her about stranger Dan just embedded in her. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and so then she put it down and then I
Speaker 1: was like, that was weird. Laura was like, yeah, like
Speaker 1: it happened really quickly in the same time. You didn't
Speaker 1: really give us a chance to say anything, but we yeah,
Speaker 1: we're kind of trying to tell mar we're doing a
Speaker 1: bad job at the moment.
Speaker 2: It's really like you said it's like there's a lot
Speaker 2: of mixed messaging. But April took it upon herself to
Speaker 2: be like, Okay, well, I can't be telling my kids
Speaker 2: there's a weirdo in the park because then they'll start
Speaker 2: calling people weirdos in the park, and.
Speaker 1: That's just that's weird in itself.
Speaker 2: So she was like, okay, I took the opportunity to say, hey, kids,
Speaker 2: the thing called stranger dangerous. If you don't know this person,
Speaker 2: they're technically a stranger to you and there could be
Speaker 2: some danger.
Speaker 1: However, she tried to do it.
Speaker 2: His Oscar telling the story about his and Macy's experience
Speaker 2: with the widow in the park.
Speaker 1: We saw a stranger and we went and then we
Speaker 1: went home puk.
Speaker 2: Fleet, so Oscar says in there we were at the park,
Speaker 2: we saw a stranger, then we left and Papa gave
Speaker 2: us a treat.
Speaker 1: So that's his recount of the story. Sounds like a
Speaker 1: lovely day out. Was a lovely day out. It's almost
Speaker 1: like he's I'm looking for the strangers now because I
Speaker 1: want to get that treat from Pop.
Speaker 2: Well that too, but April took that opportunity for it
Speaker 2: to be to teach the kids strangers in the park.
Speaker 2: If the strangers in the park, you avoid the strangers
Speaker 2: in the park. And then what they did was they
Speaker 2: have evolved that now to everyone in the park is
Speaker 2: a stranger. So then April's taught them the meaning strange
Speaker 2: danger and he's a recording of both of them saying.
Speaker 1: It stranger danger. My god, she's adorable. I know, I know.
Speaker 2: But so that it's evolved into them just calling everyone
Speaker 2: stranger dangers now, which April was like, fuck, felt really
Speaker 2: awkward because they went to the park a week later
Speaker 2: and you know, usually what happens is you go to
Speaker 2: the park with your kids, and your kids run off
Speaker 2: and there's a bunch of adults standing there with no kids.
Speaker 1: There's always there's always a few moments you go, where
Speaker 1: are they on the slide? But the kids are confused.
Speaker 1: So my friend, who's a social worker okay, who she takes.
Speaker 2: Care of the world being of children, Okay, she was
Speaker 2: telling us about there's a new thing called.
Speaker 1: I'm actually really keen to know what the right thing is.
Speaker 1: I'm all about education today. Yes, I love it.
Speaker 2: So there's a new thing called now where instead of
Speaker 2: court saying strange a danger because what it would do. Yes,
Speaker 2: it rhymes and which is not great either.
Speaker 1: Rolls off.
Speaker 2: They're like strange danger, strange danger.
Speaker 1: That reminds me of kindergarten cop. Remember that scene they're
Speaker 1: like stranger danger when the dad comes back into the school.
Speaker 1: Do you remember that that? Okay? If anyone out there
Speaker 1: who does know, I'm right, aren't the guys? Yeah?
Speaker 2: So our friend, the social worker said, it's actually different
Speaker 2: now because the stranger danger implies you're at more risk
Speaker 2: when with strangers, when you're actually at more risk with
Speaker 2: people more familiar to you.
Speaker 1: Do you know what? This is big? This is big. Continue,
Speaker 1: this is big right.
Speaker 2: The new thing that they try and focus on is
Speaker 2: what they call tricky people.
Speaker 1: So it's a tricky people theory. Okay.
Speaker 2: It focuses on teaching kids about consent, body autonomy, safe people,
Speaker 2: and recognizing warning signs.
Speaker 1: Okay.
Speaker 2: So using the language of tricky people replaces the outdated
Speaker 2: notion of stranger danger with a more empowering approach and
Speaker 2: carrying children to trust, trust their instincts. So this being said, okay,
Speaker 2: because what's more common, according to this social where is
Speaker 2: someone who is to take advantage of your child? Is
Speaker 2: someone most close to them, being a family member or
Speaker 2: a friend. So April said to Oscar, do you know
Speaker 2: any tricky people and explain tricky people that have been
Speaker 2: have made you feel uncomfortable, have not made you feel comfortable,
Speaker 2: or you might feel a little bit scared, but majority
Speaker 2: of the time make you feel uncomfortable. And guess who,
Speaker 2: Oscar pointed out.
Speaker 1: April.
Speaker 2: She just like she was like, whoa, And let's just
Speaker 2: before everyone just go to rushing at my wife here.
Speaker 1: Oscar was confused.
Speaker 2: Okay, but the difference between comfortable and uncomfortable. So what
Speaker 2: I would say before you start to ask those sort
Speaker 2: of questions before year old, you make them aware of
Speaker 2: what the word's comfortable and uncomfortable.
Speaker 1: It's a bit like Lola says she wants to window
Speaker 1: down when she actually means she wants the window up. Yeah,
Speaker 1: she gets the words confused. Yeah.
Speaker 2: So we eventually we are on that app Where's where's April?
Speaker 1: Currently? She's locked up? She's locked up, she's locked up.
Speaker 1: Do you know it's a freaking miracle that we turned
Speaker 1: out semi okay, given how everything that we were taught
Speaker 1: when we were youngsters is now actually they now know
Speaker 1: they're like that that was the wrong thing to do.
Speaker 2: And yeah, look, once again, I don't have the right
Speaker 2: answer to anything.
Speaker 1: One thing that I learned in that same kind of vein, yeah,
Speaker 1: is you know, sometimes there's certain family members. I'm not
Speaker 1: going to name and shame them, but sometimes they will
Speaker 1: say to their own kids or to my kids, if
Speaker 1: they go up and say, someone so hit me, he goes,
Speaker 1: you don't want to be a dibber dubba, don't say that,
Speaker 1: And I can't. I I get it when it's annoying.
Speaker 1: You know, when there are certain kids who just yeah,
Speaker 1: they run to the parents and they go, Timmy did this.
Speaker 1: I always use Timmy as my fake child name. Timmy
Speaker 1: is getting thrown. He's kidding it rinsed lately. But then
Speaker 1: I now know that that's really bad messaging to try
Speaker 1: and put onto a child, of saying that you can't
Speaker 1: come to a parent and say that something bad has happened,
Speaker 1: and they'll get in trouble. You want to try and
Speaker 1: encourage that to a certain.
Speaker 2: Degree, a lot of mixed messaging, with so much mixed
Speaker 2: messaging being a parent.
Speaker 1: So my little piece of advice that is definitely not
Speaker 1: advice for anyone listening. This is just for ash and
Speaker 1: if you want to use this in your own situation,
Speaker 1: sure go ahead, but I take no responsibility. It'll be
Speaker 1: a disclaimer in the show notes. Yes, it's it's called heroes.
Speaker 1: You have certain heroes that you can say anything to
Speaker 1: without getting in any type of trouble. And so the
Speaker 1: heroes a mom, dad, and there's a couple of other
Speaker 1: people in the mix, like Nana as a hero.
Speaker 2: Because there's also that thing where it's like if just say,
Speaker 2: Oscar dobs on someone and gets a result, so he'll
Speaker 2: just dob on them for something that they didn't do
Speaker 2: to try and get a result in his favor.
Speaker 1: It's it's a minefield.
Speaker 2: Try to do something that I try to do something
Speaker 2: that's wrong, but somehow it turns out to be right.
Speaker 1: It's just like, where does it end. We are confirming
Speaker 1: that April is in fact, she is not a tricky person.
Speaker 1: She is not a tricky person.
Speaker 2: She is the mother of my children for those who
Speaker 2: listening for the first time. And Oscar has agreed that
Speaker 2: he was confused with the wording.
Speaker 1: Also, when she's trying to make him eat his vegetables
Speaker 1: at dinner, he's like you're a tricky person. Hey, Lola's
Speaker 1: started doing something weird.
Speaker 3: Is it a clipse, eclipse, mint weird, mint weird, or
Speaker 3: it's on part I think I'm more about that she's
Speaker 3: she's a kleptomaniac.
Speaker 1: The stages we've spotted it, Okay, give me tell me
Speaker 1: we're aware of the issue. We found out because sometimes
Speaker 1: Laura will pick up an item of clothing from kmart
Speaker 1: or or you know, online, and I'm not aware that
Speaker 1: you know, I'll go to put a jumper on. There's
Speaker 1: just a new jumper in the wardrobe, and I don't
Speaker 1: think anything of it, and vice versa. Like Laura will
Speaker 1: go to address the kids in the morning and she'd
Speaker 1: be like, oh, there's a new T shirt, BONDI pair shorts.
Speaker 1: No big deal, I okay. But then they kept being
Speaker 1: these new items of clothing and I was like, I
Speaker 1: don't recall seeing that particular shirt. Must be Laura. And
Speaker 1: also they weren't brand new. They have already had stains
Speaker 1: on them, for example, So I was like Laura, I
Speaker 1: was like, you know, I'm doing the washing and I'm like, Hey,
Speaker 1: who's is this? Is this? Like, you know, one of
Speaker 1: your nieces or nephews. Whose shirt is this? And I'm like,
Speaker 1: I don't know, and Lola will be like, that's mine.
Speaker 1: That's why put it back, put in a wash. We
Speaker 1: had all of these new this is an extra large
Speaker 1: and what she started doing is there's a big pile
Speaker 1: of clothes in Lola's room at daycare. That's that's lost property, okay, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: And she would just flick through that and be like, oh,
Speaker 1: this is a nice cardigan. That's savvy. And then the
Speaker 1: teachers also would would just take her word for it,
Speaker 1: and Lola would say this is my cardigan, and they'd
Speaker 1: be like, ah, how do you question that it's been
Speaker 1: here for a few weeks. Sure, I think it's fair game.
Speaker 1: And it was a nice cardigan. It was like rainbow colors,
Speaker 1: it was. It was beautiful. I wonder it was seed
Speaker 1: brand as well. She's got good taste already. Very that's
Speaker 1: like the Mercedes of kid's clothing.
Speaker 2: And that's the sort of stuff you give people you
Speaker 2: don't buy for yourself.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and you're definitely not wearing it to daycare.
Speaker 2: No.
Speaker 1: My household. Anyways, we have all these new items, and
Speaker 1: every day Laula was just like Peck and more. She
Speaker 1: loves it more and more once you get away with it.
Speaker 1: Once you would be like the.
Speaker 2: Thrill of it, and they're like, maybe I could take
Speaker 2: two cardigans.
Speaker 1: She's also got a Gabby Dollhouse backpack. It's a massive backpack.
Speaker 1: And I didn't notice it because you obviously you put
Speaker 1: in another spare of clothes. You put in another set
Speaker 1: of spare clothes in the backpack in case I have
Speaker 1: an accident, and that backpack was full to the brim,
Speaker 1: and I just thought it was Laura putting in more clothes.
Speaker 1: She has just started loading it into a backpack. Genius.
Speaker 1: And she won't give anything.
Speaker 2: Even say that was a problem. I'd say, that's just
Speaker 2: she's just getting the head.
Speaker 1: Of live and she's getting the good stuff.
Speaker 2: Yeah, start selling it on Facebook marketplaces and making a profit.
Speaker 2: You see selling it was like get out of here, iPhone.
Speaker 1: There's a lot of warnings. It's about Lola. Have you
Speaker 1: said to her you can't? Of course, of course you
Speaker 1: better get something more for any jewelry, any watches. She yeah,
Speaker 1: we have. She has returned all of the items are
Speaker 1: clothing back to lost property, and they've had to move
Speaker 1: the lost property to another area. And they now they've
Speaker 1: they've changed procedure. They only asked the parents about the
Speaker 1: lost property.
Speaker 2: That's the smart thing to do. In the first place.
Speaker 2: You go to swimming like where we just listen. They've
Speaker 2: got a lost property table at the front. I always
Speaker 2: check it out. So people have got till people missing.
Speaker 2: You never know, you never know what're can find in there.
Speaker 1: You were, Lola, Look, it's been a busy week for me,
Speaker 1: my friend. I have one more story. This one happened
Speaker 1: on the weekend. I was in the park the part
Speaker 1: and Laura's dad was actually down from North Queens Aunt. Terry, Terry,
Speaker 1: I can't forget that, right, they're a good memory. Never
Speaker 1: call him Tether, call him Terry, you are. He is
Speaker 1: a lovely lord in the man's eyes. Don't you talk
Speaker 1: about Terry like that. He is nothing but a saint.
Speaker 1: He's a gentle giant. Okay. I don't know if he
Speaker 1: likes me. Maybe he does. He told me I was
Speaker 1: trying to impress Terry. I was trying to put on
Speaker 1: a good show, show him that I'm a hands on
Speaker 1: capable dad. You are. You don't need to show anyway,
Speaker 1: You don't need to prove that to anybody, but that
Speaker 1: sometimes you just want to flex that. Let him, let
Speaker 1: him know that his daughter is married to a capable,
Speaker 1: loving husband and father. I got news for Terry. And
Speaker 1: so we were at the park and I was having
Speaker 1: a particularly good day, and that it was We talked
Speaker 1: the other week about sometimes it's hard to, oh, yeah,
Speaker 1: play with a kid on the level, get on the level.
Speaker 1: You're trying to find a game that they're into, and
Speaker 1: you know, sometimes it's just not working. And this on
Speaker 1: Asian Marley and I had a really good game and
Speaker 1: we're playing it in front of Terry. What game was it?
Speaker 1: I'm glad you asked it was. There was a I
Speaker 1: want to say it was a crab, a wooden crab
Speaker 1: at the park. It was quite high, maybe like probably
Speaker 1: is about waist height. Marley was standing on the crab.
Speaker 1: The floor was lava. I was a lava monster, Okay.
Speaker 1: I was trying to get her you with me, with you? Yeah,
Speaker 1: very good game. You are way better parent than me.
Speaker 1: But anyway, let's go. I was a love monster, putting
Speaker 1: on a good show, not just for Terry, for all
Speaker 1: the people in the park. Yeah, letting everyone know who's alpha,
Speaker 1: who's the Alpha Dad. And the way the game worked
Speaker 1: is that I would run to Marley. I would try
Speaker 1: and push her off the crab, onto the lava. But
Speaker 1: she had superpowers. She could freeze me. She had super strength,
Speaker 1: and it was impossible. As lava monster, I couldn't get off.
Speaker 2: You gave her too many powers. You gave her way
Speaker 2: too many super bad But she was loving it.
Speaker 1: Bro, she was loving it. She's having a great time.
Speaker 1: She was laughing because every time I wanted to go
Speaker 1: grab her, she'd go freeze and I'd be like, and
Speaker 1: you're quite competitive, you make you say that, like my
Speaker 1: competitiveness had got the better of me. I think, I
Speaker 1: think that's where it's going. And then she would have
Speaker 1: superpowers and that she would like throw me off, and
Speaker 1: so I would go grab her and she'd throw Yeah,
Speaker 1: come back and she'd throw me off. Everyone's having a
Speaker 1: great time. Yep, what happened. I made a mistake. You
Speaker 1: got competitive, didn't you? I was overacting. No, And as
Speaker 1: I as I grabbed her, she said superpower and I
Speaker 1: went to like, I went to throw off. And at
Speaker 1: the same time I threw her threw are your child
Speaker 1: across the park? Threw her off and I didn't realize
Speaker 1: because I was like and then I looked up. As
Speaker 1: I turned around, she was just like slow mo, and
Speaker 1: I've thrown her like onto. Luckily it was the bark
Speaker 1: chip flooring in the park. Also, why can't they put
Speaker 1: something softer anyway? So she's landed on her back and
Speaker 1: she did the cry where she went, oh, she can't
Speaker 1: breathe anymore, and I was like waiting, waiting, and then
Speaker 1: she was it was all way. It was a bad scream.
Speaker 1: It was a bad scream. And also I was like,
Speaker 1: do you know what, we'll fix this? I was like,
Speaker 1: you can hit daddy. That's it for tat situation.
Speaker 2: I think every parent has done has been in the
Speaker 2: situation where they've been trying to play with their kid,
Speaker 2: do something nice for their kid or whatever it might
Speaker 2: be for your kid, and accidentally hurting them.
Speaker 1: And it's like it's such a weird feeling awful.
Speaker 2: It's awful, but you're also like, I don't know, it's awkward.
Speaker 2: It's kind of like when you were playing with a
Speaker 2: friend and you're like when you were a kid and
Speaker 2: you and you hurt that kid, You're like, don't don't anything,
Speaker 2: don't don't anything, don't anything, so no one to get
Speaker 2: in trouble.
Speaker 1: So then she started yelling, stranger danger, he's drinking. She
Speaker 1: ran straight to mom and they looked at her and
Speaker 1: you just he shook his head. Oh right, he said,
Speaker 1: you've done enough, right in front of your father in law.
Speaker 1: He didn't say that you've done enough around here. I've
Speaker 1: changed the locks.
Speaker 2: Have you seen the look in your daughter's eye when
Speaker 2: you accidentally throw them across the park.
Speaker 1: So it was a shame. It was a shame.
Speaker 2: I'm trying to think of when I I know this morning,
Speaker 2: April was like doing this game with the kids where
Speaker 2: it was like covering their eyes up and going like
Speaker 2: and pulling it away. But Macy was sitting on one
Speaker 2: of the classics while she was doing it and grabbing
Speaker 2: Macie's arm and just accidentally whacked.
Speaker 1: Her in the eye. And she was like and like
Speaker 1: you could see the look on April's face.
Speaker 2: She was like, oh my god, like it was I
Speaker 2: was trying to just play with you, but I've accidentally
Speaker 2: hurt you. So I think everyone who has kids who's
Speaker 2: listening and thinking, oh I've done.
Speaker 1: That, everyone's done that. Everyone's done a bit of rough
Speaker 1: house are they're only little.
Speaker 2: There's that ongoing joke about like how rough, how rough
Speaker 2: dads are with their kids, want to get like into
Speaker 2: toddless stages, and it's like you're just like, you know,
Speaker 2: thinking that they're unbreakable, but they're breakable.
Speaker 1: Turns out they are. They are. Turns out they are.
Speaker 1: Morley was like, why, daddy, what? Because I'm the lava
Speaker 1: monster and that's what happened. You made me the monster.
Speaker 1: I just acted like it is it time for it
Speaker 1: is time for our.
Speaker 2: New segment, Teddy couple, welcome down the street.
Speaker 1: Petty couple. They like with me, dirty couple. I love you,
Speaker 1: but immature.
Speaker 2: No one can pull wish me quite like you.
Speaker 1: Is this a petty comment? We went down to Wollongong
Speaker 1: recently for a very exciting interview which we'll be talking
Speaker 1: about in the coming weeks. But it was Dan and
Speaker 1: Willongong and that morning Laura said where are you off
Speaker 1: to today? And I said, I'm going to Willongong and
Speaker 1: she goes, I didn't know that, and I said, we
Speaker 1: didn't ask me that, petty A little bit, okay, it's
Speaker 1: a little bit aggressive. It was a bit aggressive. She's
Speaker 1: supposed to ask you every single aspect of your life. Well,
Speaker 1: she didn't ask me about it, so I thought, you
Speaker 1: don't care. They fight in words, they're fighting word. Yeah,
Speaker 1: she didn't like it. She didn't like it. I apologize.
Speaker 1: I don't think it's apologized worthy. Well, I just I'm
Speaker 1: so sorry. I don't say it like that. I've heard you. Okay.
Speaker 2: So I also did a petty thing which I did
Speaker 2: promise the listeners I was going to do, which is
Speaker 2: make me there and not make April.
Speaker 1: You did it? I did it. You're a video. How
Speaker 1: did it go down? She was a bit confused at first?
Speaker 1: Or did you cook her? I made a roast for me? What?
Speaker 1: Hang on a second? I did make her on no occasion,
Speaker 1: and no occasion is a roast a one person meal.
Speaker 1: Oh it was this night. Okay. That is the That
Speaker 1: is the biggest. That makes it so much more regressive.
Speaker 1: That is so much. No.
Speaker 2: I did make the full ros and I just hid hers.
Speaker 2: I just wanted the reaction.
Speaker 1: Where did you hide it in? I left it in
Speaker 1: the oven, nice and warm. But she came down the stairs.
Speaker 2: I knew she was hungry, and she was like, how
Speaker 2: do you know she was hungry? Because she said, daddy,
Speaker 2: I'm hungry. She came downstairs and she was like, as
Speaker 2: you seen the video, where's mine?
Speaker 1: And then it cuts out. But after that April would
Speaker 1: be such a monster.
Speaker 2: In the video is just like, yeah, I got a
Speaker 2: lot of comments being like rest in peace, my guy.
Speaker 1: Fair enough. But after a little bit more of stirring.
Speaker 2: Up and egging how much longer? I think I ate mine?
Speaker 2: At least started eating one and then she's like, no, no.
Speaker 1: Come on, come on, where's mine?
Speaker 2: And I was all right, and then I got out
Speaker 2: the other and she ate it and she really enjoyed it.
Speaker 2: But she will never ever comment on my cooking ever again.
Speaker 2: I guarantee you that if you've got anything petty to
Speaker 2: say about your partner, or anything that you do to
Speaker 2: your partner that's petty, please email us hello at two
Speaker 2: doing dads dot com or just send us a DM. Okay,
Speaker 2: this one comes from Maculvar Markov says we love petty games.
Speaker 1: Now household and then she says, well I do. Obviously
Speaker 1: a husband doesn't know.
Speaker 2: She says, he keeps leaving icy pole sticks around the house,
Speaker 2: so I keep putting them in different place, like his
Speaker 2: work boots under his pillow, inside.
Speaker 1: His socks, etc.
Speaker 2: Also, when he does piss me off when I'm in
Speaker 2: the shower, I turn the shower head facing down, so
Speaker 2: when he goes to turn the water on to warm
Speaker 2: up his shower, it sprays him straight in the eyes.
Speaker 1: Surely he must know what's going on here. You're going
Speaker 1: to cop it at one point, Michael Bay, he's just
Speaker 1: saving up if he's going to bed and he's got
Speaker 1: icy polse sticks under his pillow. Surely I need to
Speaker 1: be like, I don't remember leaving this here. At some
Speaker 1: point he's going to get you back.
Speaker 2: And if he is listening, please, once you do that,
Speaker 2: please send us in what you did to her.
Speaker 1: This one is from Jackie. She says, just sharing with
Speaker 1: you my own heavy relationship behavior towards my partner for
Speaker 1: the amusement of all. Thank you very much, Jackie. I
Speaker 1: better be amused. I have recently started using our fridge
Speaker 1: whiteboard to express my frustration with the lack of division
Speaker 1: of labor, but in our household. Mm hmm, what's this
Speaker 1: boke doing? Come on, lift your game now. In addition
Speaker 1: to all the usual family reminders, grocery lists, and school crap,
Speaker 1: I'm keeping a running tally of days since the other
Speaker 1: half unloaded the dishwasher, and she calls it the fridge
Speaker 1: of shame. She says, I might switch it up next
Speaker 1: week and start counting how many weeks since he mowed
Speaker 1: the lawn. I'm going to need a bigger whiteboard. Oh
Speaker 1: that is absolute petty behavior. I love it. Fridge of shame.
Speaker 2: I imagine referring, imagine referring him back to it and
Speaker 2: just been like, babe, you mind this washer.
Speaker 1: It's like I always do it. Have you checked the fridge?
Speaker 1: What does that tell you? I love that very good, Jackie,
Speaker 1: Thank you very much, Thank you very much. I love
Speaker 1: that ship. As should we end on a couple of
Speaker 1: listener questions, Absolutely we should, so, Matt. This is from Jenna.
Speaker 2: Hey, Jenna, she wants to know how to parents deal
Speaker 2: with the unexpected toilet runs.
Speaker 1: Just pish your pants like the rest of it. Do
Speaker 1: your kids love bush Wee's Oscar's a bushwier mace he's
Speaker 1: still in nappies. Ah, yes, yes, moments Oscar go doing
Speaker 1: bushweed that's his favorite, loves it.
Speaker 2: Was it you telling you out of the pool and
Speaker 2: do a bushwii? And he just turned around and peed
Speaker 2: into the pool from outside of it like it was
Speaker 2: a big toilet.
Speaker 1: I have heard about that one before.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he loves it so much that I'm worried if
Speaker 2: I say it indoors, he'll just find a plant pot.
Speaker 1: My girls they love a bushwii. So if we're doing wheeze,
Speaker 1: totally fine if it's unexpected. So for me, the issue
Speaker 1: is when it's a bush wei and because the girls
Speaker 1: aren't a nappies now Lola West nappy at nighttime. Issue
Speaker 1: is when a bush wei turns into a bush pooh.
Speaker 1: Because I got only rare occasions. Do I remember to
Speaker 1: bring baby whites with me just in case? Yeah? Okay,
Speaker 1: So we're at the markets, the food markets recently, Marley
Speaker 1: wanted to do a little Bushwii. So I was like, cool,
Speaker 1: I can, I can take it. There's like a behind
Speaker 1: a little bush, there's like an area where everyone gets
Speaker 1: their food and sits down there just in the middle gun.
Speaker 1: So then it's all because she was like she was
Speaker 1: winging and she's liked daddy, it's going to be like
Speaker 1: a bush poo And I was like, oh, it's a
Speaker 1: bit red hot to be doing a ship right here. Yeah,
Speaker 1: people are trying to eat, and I had to kind
Speaker 1: of explain to her, like trying to try and finish
Speaker 1: the Wii. We're going to try and then transition. She's
Speaker 1: like I can't, Oh my god. But it's also like
Speaker 1: there are certain times like if you're going through security,
Speaker 1: for example, into the airport, and your kid is like,
Speaker 1: I need to go to the toilet. That's a situation
Speaker 1: if there's a line. Yeah, like ques ques, I would say,
Speaker 1: the worst environment to begin with a surprise toilet trip.
Speaker 1: It's fucked, isn't it.
Speaker 2: We were at the Easter Show and April was like
Speaker 2: to Oscar, do you need to weak?
Speaker 1: And I was like no, but also, don't ever trust
Speaker 1: the answer. You never never trust the answer.
Speaker 2: He was like no to April and I was like
Speaker 2: you sure, and he's like no. And he hadn't weeding
Speaker 2: ages he needed to wi and he was like no,
Speaker 2: he's even grabbed his dick. For God's sake, the guy
Speaker 2: needs to weep. He's like no, and he goes, okay, well,
Speaker 2: I'm going to go off to the bathroom and leave
Speaker 2: you here with Macy and Daddy to go Wii. Okay,
Speaker 2: And it was like okay, sweet, And then she's gone off,
Speaker 2: and then ask He turns to me and goes.
Speaker 1: Oh, need to we of course you do.
Speaker 2: I was like, of course you do. You only want
Speaker 2: to go because mum's gone now. She told you so
Speaker 2: many times. And it's not just as easy as being like, okay,
Speaker 2: let's go. I've got to get stop Macie what she's doing,
Speaker 2: pick her up, put her back in the pram, strap
Speaker 2: her back in the pram, hold his hand, walk all.
Speaker 1: The way over there. But then I can't walk into
Speaker 1: the bathroom with the pram and him. It's like what
Speaker 1: the fuck?
Speaker 2: So then we've got to sit there and wait for
Speaker 2: April to come back out so I can be like,
Speaker 2: here's your child. He actually doesn't need to week. And
Speaker 2: then she walks out and I go, he needs to
Speaker 2: weat and she looks at me like.
Speaker 1: It's my fault. Was there a cue as well?
Speaker 2: So it's annoying. I'm sure any parent listening could be like,
Speaker 2: fuck it. Hell, just when we ask you to wei,
Speaker 2: just just wi.
Speaker 1: Every time we bought a plane, we say do you
Speaker 1: need to weat? They absolutely not, There's no we needed none.
Speaker 1: What's the Weever? I sit down and as soon as
Speaker 1: we put on the toilet. They're like, well, who as
Speaker 1: well release a little bit. Actually, now that I'm in here,
Speaker 1: I kind of feel like I need to we It's like,
Speaker 1: oh shit, this one is from Morgan. She says, it's annoying.
Speaker 1: Isn't it just nice? It's nice to acknowledge the people
Speaker 1: who have written in and given us questions. Morgan says,
Speaker 1: how can I be more helpful and inclusive of friends
Speaker 1: with kids? Assuming here that Morgan may not have kids, right, right, right,
Speaker 1: right right.
Speaker 2: I would say, look, it's a tough question actually, but
Speaker 2: I would say, be flexible with you your time.
Speaker 1: Start doing yoga. Yeah, every time you see that, make
Speaker 1: sure you've got baby wips. No, I would say, you
Speaker 1: know what, that's a that's a good point. That's a
Speaker 1: good point. Always. It's never a bad idea to have
Speaker 1: extra baby wipes with you. To put that out there, sorry,
Speaker 1: continue to have as many as you can, say, walk
Speaker 1: around with them, don't hand them out a palette, drive
Speaker 1: a forklift of the palette of baby wipes.
Speaker 2: I would say, be flexible with your time because for us,
Speaker 2: like trying to leave the house during the day, if
Speaker 2: it's like someone's like, yeah, come down, let's catch up.
Speaker 2: Bring your kids down. We'll catch up in the morning sometime.
Speaker 2: And they're like, why don't we meet at like eleven o'clock.
Speaker 1: That's not gonna work. Makes she still naps at twelve o'clock,
Speaker 1: you get nap trapped. You get nap trapped.
Speaker 2: And it's like, oh, yeah, we can meet at eleven,
Speaker 2: but we're going to be there for a whole fifteen
Speaker 2: minutes before I turn around and come home. And I
Speaker 2: would say, as a parent with a child who still naps,
Speaker 2: I am not dragging my child there for any.
Speaker 1: Time less than two hours. If we're there for only
Speaker 1: an hour, it's a waste of time. But thankfully, in my.
Speaker 2: Experience investment, I'm wondering, shut up. Sorry, I know what
Speaker 2: the person with that kid's probably thinking. I'll make it
Speaker 2: a bit later to give them plenty of time to
Speaker 2: get up, do their thing, and then be able to
Speaker 2: know we're up.
Speaker 1: Can I ask you a question, I'm up at six am.
Speaker 2: If you said meet you at seven am, there's much
Speaker 2: more of a chance of me being there than being
Speaker 2: there at eleven.
Speaker 1: Question for you there, sit down, I am sitting perfect.
Speaker 1: Do you prefer going out to meet these people, or
Speaker 1: would you rather they say, I'm going to come to
Speaker 1: your house at seven o'clock.
Speaker 2: Oh, why, because if the kids are stuck at home,
Speaker 2: they're mental. If you've got no kids and you've got
Speaker 2: friends with kids, here is my advice. You say, if
Speaker 2: you want to catch up with them and see the kids,
Speaker 2: you say, Hey, let's catch up for coffee at a
Speaker 2: kid's park at a reasonable time. Eight o'clock gives them
Speaker 2: time to be up awake. Kids are fair dressed. Eight
Speaker 2: eight point thirty can be late. Expect them to be
Speaker 2: late if they've got kids, because between the hours of
Speaker 2: eight thirty to midday, that's your time.
Speaker 1: There's no need to raise your voice at me. Sorry,
Speaker 1: that's your time. Okay.
Speaker 2: If it's an RVO sash, it's like, let's not hey,
Speaker 2: let's meet, let's meet like five o'clock.
Speaker 1: I'm not coming.
Speaker 2: I'm not coming because the kids will fall asleep in
Speaker 2: the car. You're going to ruin the rest of my
Speaker 2: evening when they're actually asleep. So I would say, if
Speaker 2: you're going to meet a friend in the afternoon two thirty.
Speaker 1: Another question for you, dinner din with friends? Yeah, who
Speaker 1: don't have kids, who don't have kids, they're coming to
Speaker 1: my house.
Speaker 2: That's where they come to my house because I can
Speaker 2: say get here at seven, because it'll be you'll get
Speaker 2: to say good night to the kids, and they'll love that,
Speaker 2: and you'll love that.
Speaker 1: Then they'll troof off to bed and then and then
Speaker 1: we can get shit faced. I've kind of worked out
Speaker 1: perfect out. This is not the first time you've thought
Speaker 1: about this.
Speaker 2: I think about all the time every day when someone
Speaker 2: says to me, let's let's let's do something, It's like
Speaker 2: it needs to fall within that time because if I
Speaker 2: variate my kids nap time, it ruins my afternoon. If
Speaker 2: I variate my kids actual sleep time, it ruins the
Speaker 2: rest of my night.
Speaker 1: And for anyone who doesn't have kids and may be
Speaker 1: confused with how rigid this schedule is, write it down
Speaker 1: if you do have any listener questions. For us, two
Speaker 1: doting dads don't really give advice, but may give advice.
Speaker 1: I feel like this is a nice advice ash has
Speaker 1: been just spewing out. It's like a volcano of advice
Speaker 1: non stop. This is like Pompeii, and advice is just
Speaker 1: like showering the town. I e. Me and the listeners
Speaker 1: golden showering the town. What do they send them to
Speaker 1: our Instagram to Doting dwns our email at two Doting
Speaker 1: dot com. Perfect and I think that's this episode done.
Speaker 1: And Dustin and of course we've enjoyed this episode of
Speaker 1: any episode of the Two Doting Dads catalog of episodes.
Speaker 1: What do you do?
Speaker 2: Actually, you share them to everyone you know, and you
Speaker 2: leave a review, leave a star radio, send us all
Speaker 2: your money.
Speaker 1: And if you are joining us for the first time,
Speaker 1: we've actually had a few new listeners we have. I
Speaker 1: just want to take the opportunity to say, don't fucking
Speaker 1: leave us. We haven't got to the don of begging.
Speaker 1: Go anywhere, not far off. We need you. We'll leave
Speaker 1: us a review atap podcast Spotify and we'll see you guys,
Speaker 1: see you guys. But Two Doting Dads podcast acknowledges the
Speaker 1: traditional custodians of country throughout Australia and the connections to land,
Speaker 1: see and community.
Speaker 2: We pay our respects to their elders past and present
Speaker 2: and extend that respect to all original and torrestrate Islander.
Speaker 1: Peoples to day. This episode was recorded on gadigal Land