Speaker 1: Life Uncut podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country throughout
Speaker 1: Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. We
Speaker 1: pay our respect to their elders past and present and
Speaker 1: extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Island
Speaker 1: peoples today. This episode is recorded on Gadigal Land of
Speaker 1: the Aurora Nation.
Speaker 2: Can you beat box for me again?
Speaker 3: Life on Cat?
Speaker 2: It's so lame.
Speaker 3: To do it and set it up as in, like,
Speaker 3: what's that thing you can do again? And then when
Speaker 3: I do it, you go, that's so fucking lame.
Speaker 2: At what point of your life did you teach yourself
Speaker 2: how to do that?
Speaker 3: When I was a stoner in grade nine? What was
Speaker 3: his name? Is it Razelle? No idea? He's like a
Speaker 3: famous beatboxer.
Speaker 2: Literally, no one listening to this will know who that is.
Speaker 3: In high school, it gave you a lot of street
Speaker 3: cred being able to beat box.
Speaker 2: Did you pick up chicks because you could beatbox?
Speaker 3: No? But not if your guy friends.
Speaker 2: Oh well, there's always positive.
Speaker 3: Look at your face. You're so disgusted right now. I'll
Speaker 3: never do it again.
Speaker 2: Hi guys, and we'll welcome back to another episode a
Speaker 2: very special episode of life on cut because it's bat
Speaker 2: chunk cut and I'm joined, I'm Maddie Jay.
Speaker 3: It's great to be here in this absolute sauna of
Speaker 3: a bedroom all my days. This is very painful right now.
Speaker 2: Okay, we moved the recording after the abomination. That was
Speaker 2: the last record that we did. It sounds like, and
Speaker 2: I want to apologize. Monday's record sounds like we recorded
Speaker 2: in a kitchen.
Speaker 3: That's where we always record.
Speaker 2: Give there sound acoustics of a kitchen are particularly bad.
Speaker 3: And you've now forced us to record in a sauna
Speaker 3: with a heat turned on. Football. We're sitting in our
Speaker 3: undies right now in the bedroom.
Speaker 2: We're sitting in our undies. This is as intimate as
Speaker 2: it gets. The reason why we're in here is because
Speaker 2: I think this has the best acoustics. But it's also
Speaker 2: very hot, and I can't allow Matt to put the
Speaker 2: air conditioning on. So we've already had a fight before
Speaker 2: we even started his episode.
Speaker 3: Dying right now and she won't even let me drink
Speaker 3: gin because she's like, it's making too much noise. The
Speaker 3: ice is wrapping.
Speaker 2: She did not go on have a little refreshing sip
Speaker 2: right now I'm tied up. What was that, Matt. Look,
Speaker 2: we started this episode with a bicker. We'll probably bicker
Speaker 2: a bit more. We'll probably get drunk as it goes.
Speaker 2: You guys already know the and how this all unfolds.
Speaker 3: Or I don't get drunk. I have one drink at most,
Speaker 3: and you watch me. It's very civilized. You, on the
Speaker 3: other other hand, gosh, you're a hot mess.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but you knew that when you chose.
Speaker 3: I didn't. I didn't all. I was like, she looks
Speaker 3: like a lovely, sweet young lady. A little did I know?
Speaker 2: I washed my feet in the sink.
Speaker 3: You wash your feet in the sink. You're very rashy,
Speaker 3: and you sweat a lot.
Speaker 2: I do have a rash, but I have a forehead rash.
Speaker 2: It's a heat rash. It's yeah, Look, I don't look
Speaker 2: my most attractive right now. And also my bum is
Speaker 2: sticking to the painted lemonade on this chair. But anyway,
Speaker 2: we digress, and this is what we do to bring
Speaker 2: you the goods. We have watched so much Bachelotte once again,
Speaker 2: so that you don't have.
Speaker 3: To a couple of big episodes, dozies. I'm gonna say
Speaker 3: I'm just gonna I'm gonna preface this and say, of
Speaker 3: the last two episodes, I think it's EP ten EPI eleven,
Speaker 3: the best is at the very very end end of
Speaker 3: EPI eleven is great.
Speaker 2: I think that there were some pretty stella moments throughout
Speaker 2: both episodes. I enjoyed this, and we watched that.
Speaker 3: You enjoyed ten. Oh it's a little ten. It was
Speaker 3: a little slow, if I'm being really brilli honest, right now.
Speaker 2: Okay, we just didn't do anything for you. I think
Speaker 2: you said that about seventeen times on Mondays. It's just
Speaker 2: not doing anything for me.
Speaker 3: I just want a bit of the drama.
Speaker 2: Well, it's all coming since on Monday's episode you paid
Speaker 2: me out so much about my omnilux purchase, which, mind you,
Speaker 2: I have been using every single day, might also explain
Speaker 2: why I have rush in my face.
Speaker 3: Who knows, Actually that's where the rash is coming from.
Speaker 2: It's meant to be.
Speaker 3: Did you fell asleep with it on last night? And
Speaker 3: I had to be like, Laura, can you please turn
Speaker 3: that off? The entire room is illuminated bright red, and
Speaker 3: you're like, that's not that bad. It could be that
Speaker 3: it makes a little humming noise. Also like.
Speaker 2: It could be that it fell asleep with it. And
Speaker 2: then my face started to get sweaty because it's literally plastic. Again,
Speaker 2: It's like I glad to wrap my skin in to
Speaker 2: crito sleep.
Speaker 3: The good thing is, though any mosquitoes in the room
Speaker 3: do get attracted to it, they didn't die, just it's
Speaker 3: like a little I.
Speaker 2: Come home today and Matt's also made a purchase. He's
Speaker 2: purchased the stupidest It's a seat for Lola.
Speaker 3: It's practical.
Speaker 2: It's to go on top of his shoulders. Like it's
Speaker 2: not like a child backpack. It's a seat that you
Speaker 2: put on your shoulders that your infant child is supposed
Speaker 2: to sit in. It is the dumbest invention I have
Speaker 2: ever seen. Lola is petrified of it, and I cannot
Speaker 2: believe the hypocrisy of somebody who paid me out for
Speaker 2: buying a stupid item online and you just did the
Speaker 2: same thing.
Speaker 3: Okay, Well my item cost a fraction of what yours cost,
Speaker 3: and it's very practical because we're going on another trip
Speaker 3: in a few weeks time. Lola weighs a little bit
Speaker 3: as a small baby, as a small melon, and it's
Speaker 3: hard it's hard to carry one with one arm. She's
Speaker 3: obviously too small to go on my shoulders, so this
Speaker 3: allows the babies to go on my back, on my shoulders,
Speaker 3: but it braces them in. It's genius. Lola is going
Speaker 3: to take a little bit of convincing because she hates it.
Speaker 3: But Marley liked it.
Speaker 2: No, she didn't. Okay, neither of the kids like it.
Speaker 2: That works, screaming daddy, get me down. It's kind of
Speaker 2: I mean.
Speaker 3: You enjoy that. You fucking love that, don't you. And
Speaker 3: I was like, here, Lola, do you want to try
Speaker 3: the backpack?
Speaker 2: I was like, no, you don't, Lolla. That looks horrible.
Speaker 3: You literally you literally are.
Speaker 2: It's spat in at first, No, you you.
Speaker 3: Popped a balloon in her face. You bought balloons from
Speaker 3: the convenience store. And then as I'm going to have
Speaker 3: my one on one time with the kids, you pop
Speaker 3: the balloons in their faces and you're like, out, You're
Speaker 3: so evil.
Speaker 2: It was an accident. Okay, let's get into unpacking the Bachelor.
Speaker 2: It's ten ridiculous. Ten Well ten starts off discussing something
Speaker 2: that really has been the common thread throughout every single baby.
Speaker 2: Oh does it just needs to go away.
Speaker 3: It does need to go away.
Speaker 2: And what are we talking about?
Speaker 3: Polyamory?
Speaker 2: It's back again.
Speaker 3: I wonder if people who are actually polyamorous, that is
Speaker 3: that the right word? Yes, I wonder if they're even
Speaker 3: watching this going Oh God's sake.
Speaker 2: Now, I think people who are in open relationships are
Speaker 2: watching this absolute hit show of an open relationship go down.
Speaker 3: And it's not us.
Speaker 2: Yeah, they're like, we, well, that does not represent us,
Speaker 2: because it's I mean, we'll get into it. It's confusing,
Speaker 2: but I think it's a poor representation of an open relationship,
Speaker 2: and I actually think it does a disservice to people
Speaker 2: who are doing open relationships. Well, thank you for coming
Speaker 2: to my ted to talk. But anyway, straight into Felix
Speaker 2: and Jess on a segue.
Speaker 3: How good does tangalooma Island look?
Speaker 2: This episode is brought to you by.
Speaker 3: The whole time, I was like, that place looks fucking great.
Speaker 2: Where is Tangaluma Island? How did you even know that
Speaker 2: that's what it was?
Speaker 3: Because it starts off there's like a beautiful little boat
Speaker 3: and it says tangaloom Island Resort, and then it cuts
Speaker 3: to Felix and jess on a segway on the beach,
Speaker 3: and I thought to myself, we should go there on
Speaker 3: a holiday. Looks lovely you are. I could take the
Speaker 3: back back there.
Speaker 2: You are a giant dork. Has anyone ever told you that?
Speaker 3: Oh I'm sorry, I want to take our kids on
Speaker 3: a holiday somewhere i'll enjoy. Why are you shaming me
Speaker 3: for that?
Speaker 2: It's not that you're big boxing with a shoulder pack
Speaker 2: on the.
Speaker 3: Same You didn't get that on The Bachelor, DiDio.
Speaker 2: You are a big, strong man and you're my man,
Speaker 2: and I'm proud of you, and yes, I love you.
Speaker 3: Anyways, there's a part of me that wishes I was
Speaker 3: six foot five like Felix. And also he's very funny
Speaker 3: on this date, don't you think?
Speaker 2: I think Felix is actually quite funny. Like we've said
Speaker 2: on the last episode, this episode, the redemption arc is back.
Speaker 3: Is he perfect? No, he's not.
Speaker 2: But you know what, We're all a work in progress.
Speaker 3: Yes, every time I'm with Jessica, I find myself opening
Speaker 3: up to try new things, like I'm dabbling in polyamory
Speaker 3: for crush sake. I think he just wants jess to
Speaker 3: peg him. How do you think he's like, what are
Speaker 3: we going to be into next? Like, this week it's polyamory.
Speaker 3: Next week you're fisting me. Who knows? Who knows where
Speaker 3: we'll take this. Good on Felix for being so open minded.
Speaker 2: He is is ready to explore your things. Except he's
Speaker 2: not that open mind really, Like I mean, he wants
Speaker 2: to pick Jess at the end. It's so very obvious.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, he's upset with that. And this is the
Speaker 3: first time that I've really seen Felix and Jest together
Speaker 3: and thought, ah, they could be a.
Speaker 2: Couple, except that she has a boyfriend.
Speaker 3: Except Damien's just snorkeling in the background, and it's like, Damien,
Speaker 3: we can fucking see you, mate. Oh god, literally, Damien
Speaker 3: is everywhere.
Speaker 2: Next up is a date between Keiki and Thomas and
Speaker 2: now kicking and Thomas. These are the very last single
Speaker 2: dates as well of the entire season. Mine you sit,
Speaker 2: these are really important. You got to make the most
Speaker 2: of every second together because, as we all know, it's
Speaker 2: been rammed down our throats. There is an engagement coming.
Speaker 2: So Keeky and Thomas are sitting down and having a
Speaker 2: bit of a romantic time together.
Speaker 3: What were they doing again?
Speaker 2: Sitting like, where were they picnicking? I can't remember.
Speaker 3: I can't remember.
Speaker 2: Is a long time ago.
Speaker 3: It was like two hours ago that we rewatched it. Yeah, sorry, continue.
Speaker 2: Okay, not important. Kicking and Thomas are sitting down and
Speaker 2: Thomas has realized he really wants to have kids and
Speaker 2: they haven't had. He hasn't really gotten any clear answers
Speaker 2: out of Kiki, so instead of asking her a direct
Speaker 2: question like, hey, can we just talk about it again?
Speaker 2: Do you want to have kids? Could you see yourself
Speaker 2: having kids with me? Old meditation boy gets asked what
Speaker 2: do you see in your future? And well, he has
Speaker 2: this to say.
Speaker 4: The way that I see this with you is that
Speaker 4: after this and we kind of like take our time
Speaker 4: to really live every single moment, get to know each
Speaker 4: other more and experiencing the creation of life with each
Speaker 4: other and just growing.
Speaker 5: It.
Speaker 3: I love that. I love that, you know. It's almost
Speaker 3: It's such a great way of asking the question without
Speaker 3: obviously asking the question. He could even say things like
Speaker 3: do you like being really tired and exhausted all the time?
Speaker 3: Just testing the waters for where she's at.
Speaker 2: Sorry, that was funny, but I didn't know where you
Speaker 2: were going with it. So I was a bit like,
Speaker 2: where is this going? Can you say that last week?
Speaker 3: It's not like you to not laugh at my joke.
Speaker 3: Be in the moment, Laura, Be in the moment, in
Speaker 3: the moment you're thinking.
Speaker 2: About the joke.
Speaker 3: I know, and just trust that I will deliver something
Speaker 3: that's quite funny.
Speaker 2: I mean, it wasn't that funny, to be honest.
Speaker 3: Let me try it again.
Speaker 2: Okay. So instead of Thomas just saying I want to
Speaker 2: have kids, he says I would like to experience the
Speaker 2: creation of life with each other and just growing it.
Speaker 3: That's beautiful. That's beautiful.
Speaker 2: Been growing a child, like growing a human, growing the relationship.
Speaker 2: Like it's very ambiguous, experience.
Speaker 3: The creation of life? Shit, what does that even mean?
Speaker 3: It sounds good, though, I wonder if he really knows
Speaker 3: what he's saying or if he's just like, this sounds good.
Speaker 3: I feel yeah, I really dribble this out. I want
Speaker 3: to experience a creation of life. Imagine if I said
Speaker 3: that to you.
Speaker 5: Do you know?
Speaker 2: This reminds me of just like reading a horoscope, like
Speaker 2: it says everything and it says nothing. Thomas is a
Speaker 2: walk horoscope. So Kiki is confused. Thomas confused.
Speaker 3: Kick is like what and what do you want to do?
Speaker 3: What is it?
Speaker 2: Okay, they end up buying a plant and now we
Speaker 2: go in so what they get a plant together to
Speaker 2: experience life?
Speaker 3: No?
Speaker 2: Okay, yeah I thought I was.
Speaker 3: For a second. I was like, they buy a.
Speaker 2: Plant, they planted a plant, and they experience the creation
Speaker 2: of life and growing it. Gotcha, that's you know, people
Speaker 2: or a human.
Speaker 3: People must be so confused right now, like what what
Speaker 3: is the recap? And what is a joke? We don't know.
Speaker 3: I'm as confused as you guys are.
Speaker 2: Should we talk about Jed?
Speaker 3: Yeah, my beloved Jed.
Speaker 2: What does Jed do? You have to look at your notes?
Speaker 2: Jed goes on a date with Angela, and you know what,
Speaker 2: this is so close to the end now, and I
Speaker 2: think that for Jed, he really has taken the experiment seriously.
Speaker 3: So this last single day with Angela is so important
Speaker 3: to establish that relationship.
Speaker 2: What's up?
Speaker 3: Right? We have a lot to talk about still.
Speaker 2: Jed's supposed to be proposing in a week's time. They're
Speaker 2: getting married in a week's time, and he is saying
Speaker 2: this single date is so important to establish a relationship.
Speaker 3: I don't believe this proposal bullshit for one second. I'm
Speaker 3: so confused, so trying to tease it too much. Isn't
Speaker 3: like there will be a proposal, And now it's like
Speaker 3: there may be a proposal. Now it's just like there
Speaker 3: is a ring. It's like, God, is there going to
Speaker 3: be a proposal or not.
Speaker 2: Literally, nobody except for Leah wants to be proposed to.
Speaker 2: Not a single person in our house.
Speaker 3: Liz like, I'll accept a ring from any one of
Speaker 3: you three, don't care who it is. Anyone want one.
Speaker 2: But honestly, it's actually batshit crazy. Like they've been in
Speaker 2: there for seven weeks, and I think that that's what
Speaker 2: they said, seven weeks in total. If you propose to me,
Speaker 2: did you ever think about it, I'm trying to think bad.
Speaker 2: Did you ever have a moment where you were like, oh,
Speaker 2: fuck it, I'll just propose we can break up of it.
Speaker 3: No, I think I was being very sensible. I think
Speaker 3: now now, if like thirty five year old Matt went
Speaker 3: on The Bachelor, I'll be like, fuck it, I'm doing it.
Speaker 3: I'm knowing it.
Speaker 2: Also, in hindsight, it worked out quite well. Yeah, so
Speaker 2: it's easy to say that now.
Speaker 3: But at the time.
Speaker 2: I think if you propose to me, I would have
Speaker 2: said no.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I really do think you'd have to be absolutely
Speaker 3: that shit crazy in the Bachelor to drop an ee unless.
Speaker 2: No offense to anyone who drops Blake Garby.
Speaker 3: Sorry, mate, don't better throw daggers at you over there.
Speaker 3: I do. I think you really need to be in
Speaker 3: the real world because it's just, you know, Maths is
Speaker 3: different Mass because you're with the one person the entire
Speaker 3: way through.
Speaker 2: I mean, and they do get married at the very beginning. Okay,
Speaker 2: so we're coming to the end of the single dates,
Speaker 2: but we do go back to Jessica and Felix's date
Speaker 2: one more time, just to have a little recap to
Speaker 2: try and establish where jess is at, because, to be honest,
Speaker 2: the girl talks in circles, and understanding where jess is
Speaker 2: at in her relationship is more confusing than listening to
Speaker 2: this podcast episode.
Speaker 5: Like sometimes when I look at you, especially I don't know,
Speaker 5: especially when you're like, oh, from the distance, Like I think,
Speaker 5: like I could legitimately fall like in love with this.
Speaker 3: Man, Why so far away? I don't get it. Why
Speaker 3: not when she's up close?
Speaker 2: Well, I feel like when she's up close, she's like,
Speaker 2: oh no, no, no decision. But when he's off in the
Speaker 2: distance a little bit blurry and she's a little bit drunk,
Speaker 2: she's like, I could have sex with that. I could
Speaker 2: do this anyway. We've all been there, right.
Speaker 3: I love Jess. Isn't she amazing? She's great.
Speaker 2: She's possibly the most confused person that's ever been on
Speaker 2: the Bachelor.
Speaker 3: And obviously, at this point, it's so obvious that Felix
Speaker 3: is obsessed with Jess.
Speaker 2: But and I've said it before, the reason why he's
Speaker 2: obsessed with her is because he wants to win. And
Speaker 2: I will get more into that later, but I think
Speaker 2: that this is all a game of chase for Felix.
Speaker 2: The other thing, as well, is in the golden days
Speaker 2: in the old Bachelor, the jeopardy that we used to
Speaker 2: have with Mark in my day, Mark and mid the
Speaker 2: jeopardy used to have was like someone lived in Sydney
Speaker 2: and the other person lived in Melbourne. Now we've got
Speaker 2: someone who lives in Townsville, someone who lives in Melbourne,
Speaker 2: and they've got a boyfriend.
Speaker 3: Yeah, they've really ramped up the jeopardy, haven't they. They
Speaker 3: sure did, So, who's an ex girl. She's passed away.
Speaker 3: But mom, dad, this is Samantha, who I really love,
Speaker 3: although she's not living. That's what it's going to be.
Speaker 3: I can't wait for next year's Bachelor.
Speaker 2: Do we have to unpack that one?
Speaker 3: No, this is the last season.
Speaker 2: We say that every year, so that's fine.
Speaker 3: Okay. A group dates.
Speaker 2: I love a group date.
Speaker 3: Group dates, and do you know what I love about you?
Speaker 2: Remind me what happened because I've forgotten.
Speaker 3: We had a sexologist.
Speaker 2: Oh, Juliet Allan? How did I forget? Yes, we have
Speaker 2: interviewed Juliet Allan on the podcast before, so when I
Speaker 2: saw her pop up on my screen, I was like,
Speaker 2: isn't this a moment of synchronicity?
Speaker 3: Well, you know what they normally do. There's been this
Speaker 3: old man who I think has done the last I'm
Speaker 3: going to say, four seasons of The Bachelor. He's the
Speaker 3: I don't know if you remember there, so bear with me.
Speaker 3: He's the human lie detector. Do you remember him? And
Speaker 3: then the year before that, he was like a former FBIA.
Speaker 3: Before that, he was like a sex coach. Before that,
Speaker 3: he was a chef.
Speaker 2: So we joked about this on the last season of Bachelor.
Speaker 2: That whenever they get an expert.
Speaker 3: On as an actor, that's a workstut.
Speaker 2: And yeah, and they never ever ever have the skill
Speaker 2: set that they say that they have.
Speaker 3: Because we had this, we had on a hard day,
Speaker 3: the psychic and she wasn't a psychic, no.
Speaker 2: Because she came back several seasons later as a love coach. Yes,
Speaker 2: all right, but Juliet Allen is actually a sex and
Speaker 2: love coach because we've had her on the podcast. She's brilliant.
Speaker 2: She's spoken about sex and lobido and loads of different
Speaker 2: things in the past. Also, she had a really saucy
Speaker 2: episode all around tantry sex like group sex thing that
Speaker 2: she did and it was fucking wild. Go listen to
Speaker 2: that episode. But they sit down with Juliet to get
Speaker 2: a bit more of an insight and to unpack some
Speaker 2: of the hairy, scary, dramatic questions that are going on
Speaker 2: in their relationships and for general, Lysia, who are the
Speaker 2: very first couple that sit down on the couch. The
Speaker 2: big jeopardy, the big cliffhanger, The big scary thing is
Speaker 2: that Alicia actually is in a right frame of mind
Speaker 2: and doesn't want to get engaged to at the end
Speaker 2: of this she just wants to have a lovely boyfriend,
Speaker 2: have a lovely, normal life date, and that seems to
Speaker 2: be a big problem.
Speaker 6: I understanding engagement is a big decision.
Speaker 3: It does mean something to me.
Speaker 6: It's a sign of commitment.
Speaker 3: This is a weird one. They're trying to make something
Speaker 3: out of nothing here because Alicia is like, Hey, Jed,
Speaker 3: I really really like you. I'm falling in love with you.
Speaker 3: I can see a great future. I just don't want
Speaker 3: to say yes to a proposal on a TV show,
Speaker 3: but I really want to date you. And Jed's like, fuck,
Speaker 3: I don't know what to do.
Speaker 2: For me, but hard I see I think this, like
Speaker 2: if he's actually genuinely using this as like, well, I
Speaker 2: don't know what I want because I need someone who's
Speaker 2: prepared to commit to a proposal for me. That's either
Speaker 2: being pushed by producers or it's a real sign of immaturity,
Speaker 2: Like you're not picking a relationship because somebody's going to
Speaker 2: be ready to get married after seven weeks, do you
Speaker 2: know what I mean? Like that's more about winning the Bachelor
Speaker 2: rather than picking the person who's right for you.
Speaker 3: Yes, maybe there could be that pressure from Felix who's like, yep, bro,
Speaker 3: I'm a little fucking proposed. Bro. Are you going to
Speaker 3: do it?
Speaker 5: Jed?
Speaker 3: Huh? And Felix is like yes, no, I mustay we're
Speaker 3: going to experience a life together. And then Jed's going, shit,
Speaker 3: I need to propose as well. I don't want to
Speaker 3: be the only one not proposing.
Speaker 2: Okay, but what if he ends up choosing somebody Like
Speaker 2: could you imagine if you chose the other person just
Speaker 2: because they were the more willing person to say that
Speaker 2: they would get married.
Speaker 3: Who's the other person? Again? It's Angela, Angela.
Speaker 2: It feels like a trick question.
Speaker 3: And there is Courtney in the mix. Let's not forget that.
Speaker 2: Oh sorry, yeah.
Speaker 3: But in this episode there are some people who get
Speaker 3: zero ware time. Yeah, like Courtney? Was she in the
Speaker 3: episode yet? The end? But group date Nah didn't see.
Speaker 2: Her irrelevant because we knew she's going to eat herself
Speaker 2: at the end. Anyway, she's out and she's out.
Speaker 3: She's like timers, chicken, Come on, Cotney, how you're still
Speaker 3: there for a moment? Can we just talk about a
Speaker 3: love story which was once blossoming? It was beautiful, it
Speaker 3: was lovely, and it is now a steaming pile of
Speaker 3: shit took the words right out of my mouth. Thank you,
Speaker 3: thank you. It's disgusting to watch on the screen.
Speaker 2: I mean it's not that bad, but poor Keiky and Thomas. God,
Speaker 2: the wheels really fell off that way with the Flora.
Speaker 3: Get them off the screen.
Speaker 2: So we need to apologize. I think it's this point
Speaker 2: in the episode where we need to tell you that
Speaker 2: it's so obvious that we have no fucking idea what
Speaker 2: we're talking about. Because both Matt Night were convinced that
Speaker 2: Kiki was going to be there at the end. We
Speaker 2: were like, so convinced. I think I even said I
Speaker 2: might eat my own shit.
Speaker 3: I also said, oh my god, you're gonna have to
Speaker 3: eat your own shit tonight.
Speaker 2: I also said the same thing about Crystal, so I
Speaker 2: might have shit entree and shit mains delicious sorted. They
Speaker 2: both went home. So it's so obvious that we do
Speaker 2: not know what we're talking about.
Speaker 3: There must be a new editor working over there at
Speaker 3: Channel ten. They're doing a very good job keeping us guessing,
Speaker 3: aren't they They are.
Speaker 2: But I would like to say one thing. I think
Speaker 2: it is very admirable of Kiki that she didn't just
Speaker 2: say what Thomas wanted her to say, because you know,
Speaker 2: it's so easy easy to lie. It's so easy to
Speaker 2: just be like, yeah, but you know, I can see
Speaker 2: myself having two kids, and then just never get frank.
Speaker 3: Just do it, Jess, and just be like, maybe I
Speaker 3: think maybe I could have kids.
Speaker 2: Just talk in circles and say that's children. You know,
Speaker 2: it's a really empowering idea. And you know we have
Speaker 2: such an amazing connection, and children just really grow that connection,
Speaker 2: and you know you're gonna love my kids. She didn't
Speaker 2: answer the question. That's all you have to do. Just
Speaker 2: don't answer the question by answering the question with a
Speaker 2: lot of words.
Speaker 3: Just say I want to enjoy the recreation of life
Speaker 3: with you. And then even Thomas is like, what the
Speaker 3: fuck does that mean? The sexologist is like, you guys
Speaker 3: are cooked, get out of here. Felix Felix speaking of cooked. No, no, no, no, no.
Speaker 3: He's great, isn't it. He comes out with his fucking zingers.
Speaker 2: He does a good interview, He's got a few good
Speaker 2: liners in there, doesn't he. But he's just so on
Speaker 2: the jest train, and he's just so bedazzled by her
Speaker 2: little jewelly face and her blue eyes. He just the
Speaker 2: poor thing talking.
Speaker 3: About Felix and Kiki. Sorry Felix and Crystal. Felix and Crystal.
Speaker 2: Oh, Felix. I forgot she was.
Speaker 3: Doing because they've got a really obvious problem right now.
Speaker 2: Questioning with Crystal whether we can push past this friendship status.
Speaker 3: Is there a way of crossing that barrier of just
Speaker 3: sort of sex and laughter. I don't know what kind
Speaker 3: of friends Felix has, but I want some of those friendships.
Speaker 2: How many people have fucked there?
Speaker 3: Someone's like, Felix, you know you don't. You're not meant
Speaker 3: to fuck all your friends? And he's like, what do
Speaker 3: you mean? That's that's what friends are for.
Speaker 2: Right friend Zoneder I fucked her last night. She gets it,
Speaker 2: she knows where she standing.
Speaker 3: I love how we just get these little glimpses into
Speaker 3: what Felix is really like.
Speaker 2: We need to see if this can move past a
Speaker 2: friendship because all that we have is sex and laughter. Also,
Speaker 2: does it not make you question because like, and I
Speaker 2: know I've said it on every episode, there has to
Speaker 2: be more that's happened. If all they have is sex
Speaker 2: and laughter, maybe they had sex.
Speaker 3: Maybe they had sex and they've edited it.
Speaker 2: Out because it was too much Crystal. Maybe Crystal's the
Speaker 2: one we need to get on the podcast and get
Speaker 2: to the bottom of the lown and dirty.
Speaker 3: A lot of people have asked for Crystal to be on.
Speaker 2: I feel like she's the one person who would tell
Speaker 2: us the truth as well, and.
Speaker 3: I feel like she'd be the one person who would
Speaker 3: make a cracking bachelorette because obviously we've teased it and
Speaker 3: it's been peppy throughout this episode. She goes, she's out
Speaker 3: of here. Yeah, she gets let go.
Speaker 2: It was it was a sad moment, wasn't it. But
Speaker 2: we've got other things to talk about first. So basically,
Speaker 2: ya to get a YadA. Everyone gets a little bit
Speaker 2: of time on the couch to unpack their feelings and
Speaker 2: where they're out in the relationship, you know, to try
Speaker 2: and get to the bottom of all the deep questions.
Speaker 2: Once again, it's Felix and jests and show.
Speaker 3: I didn't even want to talk, we have to. It's
Speaker 3: very It's so quick because I'm so exhausted talking about
Speaker 3: those two. I can't, I cannot, I cannot. Laura make
Speaker 3: it snappy.
Speaker 2: So Felix basically thirty Seconday Felix aus Jess point blank,
Speaker 2: you know, are you going to break up with Damien
Speaker 2: after this? You're gonna still be with him? And Jess
Speaker 2: talks in circles and doesn't actually confirm that she will
Speaker 2: leave Damien.
Speaker 3: She's like, I still love him, and Felix is like, great,
Speaker 3: so you're breaking up with him tomorrow and she's like, no,
Speaker 3: he's someone I always want my life and he's like sweet,
Speaker 3: so we'll move then to Sydney together. He just doesn't
Speaker 3: get it.
Speaker 5: I will still love Damien, he just won't be my
Speaker 5: primary partner anymore.
Speaker 6: Would there be anything sexual in nature about that relationship
Speaker 6: with Damien?
Speaker 5: No, So if you and I were to end up
Speaker 5: together at the end, I don't think that I would
Speaker 5: be comfortable having sex with him.
Speaker 2: There's nothing more reassuring that getting into a relationship with
Speaker 2: someone and them saying I don't think I would be comfortable, right.
Speaker 2: I don't think I could do it, but maybe always
Speaker 2: good to keep your options over.
Speaker 3: Did do you think Felix is watching this back and
Speaker 3: being like, ah, that's what she was saying.
Speaker 2: I also like how Felix is like no. Jess has
Speaker 2: been very direct with me, and I feel like he
Speaker 2: is going to see this play out and go, hmm
Speaker 2: my bad. Sometimes you see what you want to see. Anyway,
Speaker 2: we then go into the cocktail party. The cocktail party,
Speaker 2: it should come as no surprise to anyone, and that
Speaker 2: is that there is more chat about polyamory. But the
Speaker 2: reason why this has come up again is because Jess
Speaker 2: drops an absolute.
Speaker 5: Bomb, like, if we're doing long distance school, I don't
Speaker 5: know how I'm going to go with no physical intimacy
Speaker 5: for that length of time because I find that I
Speaker 5: really disconnect from that person. And that's why my ideal
Speaker 5: situation is maintaining a physical sexual relationship with.
Speaker 3: Damien and Laura. Am I correct in? Because I did
Speaker 3: kind of zone out a little bit when.
Speaker 2: You were watching Tiktoks.
Speaker 3: Yes, I was so. Felix is under the impression that
Speaker 3: if he picks her, no more sexy time between Jess
Speaker 3: and Damien. Right, But now in the chat with Abigail,
Speaker 3: she's saying, well, you know, if it's long distance and
Speaker 3: I'm getting bored, I may get a bit of Damien.
Speaker 3: Is that what she's saying?
Speaker 2: Yes?
Speaker 3: Yeah, right, all right, Abigail is why would.
Speaker 2: You say that to the one other person who's dating
Speaker 2: the same guy, Like, why would you of all the
Speaker 2: women in the house that you could say that to,
Speaker 2: why would you say it to Abigail.
Speaker 3: It's like, well, she has a level of naivety. I
Speaker 3: think she's not quite aware of the impact that her
Speaker 3: words will have. Like, surely she must realize, but saying
Speaker 3: that to Abigail is huge news, right, I don't even.
Speaker 2: Know if that's like a bit of a game plan
Speaker 2: to get her angry, Like it's so weird.
Speaker 3: Imagine that actually tugs on on poor Abigail's dress. Hey,
Speaker 3: you want to hear something fucked up? Abigail's going? So
Speaker 3: what's that, Jesse, what do you want to tell me?
Speaker 3: I still want to have sex with Damien anyway, Babebs,
Speaker 3: Abigail is like, what the hell is going on?
Speaker 2: Abigail is off it, just like everybody else watching and
Speaker 2: talking about polyamorys off it now as well, Wow, let's it.
Speaker 2: Let's get am so quickly quickly, we.
Speaker 3: Have to say it. People went home. Courtney grabbed Jed
Speaker 3: aside and was like, you know what, bro, I can
Speaker 3: tell that you love Alyssia so much that I'm wasting
Speaker 3: my time here, And then Jed goes, yeah, you're pretty much. Ah,
Speaker 3: So she gets out of there. Crystal leaves the one
Speaker 3: who you said was gonna win. Shock, horror, that's a shame.
Speaker 2: She was really upset. Crystal was crying.
Speaker 3: I do like Abigail. Okay, I know, I've called her
Speaker 3: the crazy cat lady for a little while, Carrots, carrots
Speaker 3: as well, hand on saucy girl. What else did I
Speaker 3: call her as well? Oh yeah, she to Mysaurce, I
Speaker 3: do like Abigail. I did think. I did think Cristal
Speaker 3: would be there at the end, and I'm very surprised
Speaker 3: that he let her go, Like Tilly and Crystal to me,
Speaker 3: two people who had a really strong connection. I know
Speaker 3: that's very cliche. I cannot believe that it's Abigail at
Speaker 3: the end. I didn't. I did not see this coming
Speaker 3: at all.
Speaker 2: You're gonna be okay, I'm fine. Want to get a gin?
Speaker 3: I'm fine? Yeah? Yeah? Oh wait? Who else went home?
Speaker 3: Did someone else go home? Courtney? Crystal and Kiki.
Speaker 2: I was so sure that Kiki was gonna end up
Speaker 2: with Thomas. But you know what, She's gone home to
Speaker 2: her kids and she's not having any more of them.
Speaker 3: For the best, Thank God. Episode eleven. But first I'm
Speaker 3: gonna have a really quick little drinks break. The last
Speaker 3: time we did the record, that was after we had sex,
Speaker 3: wasn't it? What last time we did the record and
Speaker 3: in Borron after we had sex?
Speaker 2: No, it was why would we have sex and then
Speaker 2: do a record like, oh the day prior? That's like,
Speaker 2: it's the secret sauce.
Speaker 3: I was still buzzing off that. I'm all clugged up
Speaker 3: right now. You're a lot funnier after we've had sex,
Speaker 3: I'll tell you that much.
Speaker 2: Jesus.
Speaker 3: You can tell me anything, and I'm just like, oh
Speaker 3: my god, you're amazing. But right now all I can
Speaker 3: think about is having sex?
Speaker 2: Is that true? You get to about day four and
Speaker 2: you're rubbish? Can I like it's been too long?
Speaker 3: You get the itch very right now?
Speaker 2: I'm just sweaty, very itchy, very sweaty. Should we get
Speaker 2: into unpacking episode number eleven?
Speaker 3: You do have quite a shiny brown I.
Speaker 2: Have such a rash on my forehead. What is this?
Speaker 3: What do you be wearing headbands or something? Honestly serious question?
Speaker 2: I look like I have a sweatband and on my
Speaker 2: foread do.
Speaker 3: Wear a hat today?
Speaker 2: I think it's from the hat I was wearing in Byron.
Speaker 2: I think I just had the hat on too much
Speaker 2: and I got like heat rash.
Speaker 3: It's really good. The rash is coming up, is it really? Yeah? Yeah?
Speaker 2: Oh my god.
Speaker 3: It is too very rashy.
Speaker 2: Damn it. I thought it was getting better. It's got
Speaker 2: worse out has it just been getting worse as the
Speaker 2: record's been going on.
Speaker 3: This is what married life looks like.
Speaker 2: Rashy, just rashy.
Speaker 3: And urundies sweating in the room and it's forty degrees
Speaker 3: in our room right now.
Speaker 2: This is talking about how we don't have sex.
Speaker 3: This is married life. It's it's beautiful.
Speaker 2: Talking about a TV show.
Speaker 3: Literally, yeah, this is any single people out there, don't
Speaker 3: do it, stay single, enjoy your lives, all right?
Speaker 2: Episode number eleven.
Speaker 3: Wasn't this a big episode? Holy dick, Jess.
Speaker 2: I love it.
Speaker 3: Let's start with Jess and Damien.
Speaker 2: Can you slow down? Warm them up? Matt's ready to go.
Speaker 2: Just slow it down. Let's let's get into it.
Speaker 3: You know I'm not good at full play, so true
Speaker 3: because you're always just like put it in. No, all right, No,
Speaker 3: we start kissing and you go get on top and
Speaker 3: I'm like, we've been kissing for what like a minute,
Speaker 3: and you're like, alright, let's wrap it up. Come on,
Speaker 3: let's get this show on the right people.
Speaker 2: It's not that, it's just that not like some full
Speaker 2: plays better than other full play and sometimes it's just
Speaker 2: like easy just to go to the main event.
Speaker 3: I'm trying to make full play happen, and you're always like,
Speaker 3: it's nine thirty, it's too late. Make it quick.
Speaker 2: Speaking when I said let's sit on this for a
Speaker 2: little while and flesh it out, I didn't mean talking
Speaker 2: about our sex life and then talking about what this
Speaker 2: episode was about before we just go straight to Jess
Speaker 2: and Damian. It's hometown's maybe since we're here, since we're
Speaker 2: on the topic, it's hometowns.
Speaker 3: But it's not really hometowns, is it.
Speaker 2: It's hometowns where the tears.
Speaker 3: Because it's hometowns, but it's all on the Gold Coast.
Speaker 3: The Old Coast is getting a red hot run.
Speaker 2: Oh that's true. Yes, But it's also basically like, not
Speaker 2: only do they meet so not only do the bachelor's
Speaker 2: meet the girl's parents, they also meet Felix's parents. So
Speaker 2: it's like it's like a combined family meet and greet.
Speaker 2: It's cute. Yeah, yes, which I like. And you know what,
Speaker 2: We kick it off with Felix, who goes on a
Speaker 2: beautiful date with Abigail. She is lovely, she is sweet,
Speaker 2: Abigail is honestly, she's a white material.
Speaker 3: She's wifey.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's not going to pick her, but she's life material.
Speaker 2: She is so basically everything just goes so lovely, which
Speaker 2: it also reaffirms to me that he's not going to
Speaker 2: choose her because it's too perfect, it's too easy. She
Speaker 2: gets along with the family. Everyone's lovely, love love you, happy,
Speaker 2: happy happy.
Speaker 3: She works on a law firm. O. Yeah, don't you
Speaker 3: think we should have known that?
Speaker 2: Like two, I didn't even commit that thing to memory,
Speaker 2: so that part of her story I still don't know.
Speaker 2: I just thought she stayed at home with a cat.
Speaker 3: I just like, what do you do? I have fifteen cats.
Speaker 2: Screaming at the fridge anytime someone gets a tomato sauce. Y,
Speaker 2: I hired from Tomato Sauce, and I feed my cats.
Speaker 2: That's pretty much it.
Speaker 3: Like, still better than Jess. Sorry, so bad? That was good? Keish?
Speaker 3: Was that good? Yeah? That was good? Keish? Right? Now
Speaker 3: is sitting there laughing, having a great old times.
Speaker 2: She hates editing these no, no, no, no, no.
Speaker 3: She told me, She's like, I love editing you and
Speaker 3: Laura fighting.
Speaker 2: Fighting and talking about Matt's files and how sweaty you are.
Speaker 3: We do have to edit out a few little squabbles
Speaker 3: here and there. Ohk you this being one of them.
Speaker 2: All right, Okay, So Abigail's family time is divine. They
Speaker 2: all love her. It's perfect.
Speaker 3: Imagine. I was like hoping that the producers would stitch
Speaker 3: her up and have a way to bring out tomato sauce.
Speaker 3: I was just like it was going so well that
Speaker 3: something had to go wrong, And I'm like, why that
Speaker 3: was such a missed opportunity.
Speaker 2: Okay, but what do you think of her throwing Jess
Speaker 2: under the bus?
Speaker 3: Yeah? I don't know about this one.
Speaker 2: Did she throw her under the bus?
Speaker 3: Yea? She picked her up and like tossed her on
Speaker 3: a highway full of buses.
Speaker 2: And Jess is onder being like, no stop, Abigail. Abigail's like,
Speaker 2: you will get under this bus literally, And that's pretty
Speaker 2: much what happened. I know, Okay. I think she went
Speaker 2: about it the wrong way. I don't disagree.
Speaker 3: What telling the mum?
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's the problem. I feel like Abigail needed to
Speaker 2: have a conversation with Felix, a direct conversation, saying, look,
Speaker 2: this came up at the last cocktail party.
Speaker 3: I know that, but even that just makes her look
Speaker 3: even like the brother. Tell it to the brother, not
Speaker 3: the mummy.
Speaker 2: Why did she call her mummy? Anyway? She really throws
Speaker 2: Jess under a bus.
Speaker 6: When I last spoke to Jess, she was saying that
Speaker 6: after the finane she would still maintain that sexual contact
Speaker 6: with her.
Speaker 3: Current partner.
Speaker 6: Because she doesn't feel like they're at the point where
Speaker 6: she will let Damien go.
Speaker 2: Do you know what, though, I think Felix's mum is
Speaker 2: a real MVP of this whole situation.
Speaker 3: Oh she was great, wasn't she.
Speaker 2: I mean, and she's as confused as anyone.
Speaker 7: I just don't know why you would it's not there
Speaker 7: must be some other show she can go on.
Speaker 3: I love moms so much. I live for a good mum,
Speaker 3: not in a weird sexual way, but in a hometown's awkwardness.
Speaker 3: Great grab moving on, Felix's mum is quite hot. I
Speaker 3: like what she's got to offer. Yeah, what do you
Speaker 3: think think that little bob haircut with the fringe. She's
Speaker 3: very cute and you like her quite a lot.
Speaker 2: You're so fucking weird.
Speaker 3: Imagine if that's who I ended up with and I
Speaker 3: was like, Laura, I'm sorry, I'm seeing Felix's mom. Imagine
Speaker 3: Felix would fucking hate me if.
Speaker 2: You left me for Felix and then you became Felix's dad.
Speaker 3: Wouldn't that be a wild story.
Speaker 2: That would be a really good TV show. And then
Speaker 2: Miller then he'd be dating Jess and you guys could
Speaker 2: all live in a commune together.
Speaker 3: That's the dream.
Speaker 2: That's beautiful.
Speaker 3: One can only wish that.
Speaker 2: Was fucking weird. Thanks for taking it there, honey.
Speaker 3: Who was next? It was Jed's family again. Okay, great mother.
Speaker 3: I really enjoyed this episode. Jed's mom, don't even get
Speaker 3: me started.
Speaker 2: She's awesome. But what I love about me eating Jed's family?
Speaker 2: How can you stop? You're like licking your You're just
Speaker 2: being so weird. Okay, what I love is just what
Speaker 2: a normal family fucking stop?
Speaker 3: How I'm just sitting here?
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, and.
Speaker 3: What are you trying to do? I'm sitting here? Ready, ready,
Speaker 3: to continue on the conversation. You're painting me out like
Speaker 3: I'm this.
Speaker 2: Like you're masturbating in the corner, Felix.
Speaker 3: His mum is that you it's so hot in this.
Speaker 3: Laura and I are now naked.
Speaker 2: We're not lying. I'm pretty much top like it. I'm
Speaker 2: going topless here we are. This is just I'll put
Speaker 2: it back on that. It's like this is wild, okay, continuing.
Speaker 3: Jed's mum has a beautiful family.
Speaker 2: They're just the most wholesome family. But they had the
Speaker 2: most relatable, normal moment, a.
Speaker 6: Big moment ship.
Speaker 2: I wish you wouldn't speak like that.
Speaker 3: I'm not twelve years old.
Speaker 2: Shouldn't swear in front of Elizia.
Speaker 3: I'm not going to swear in front of them female,
Speaker 3: or their fan or your mother. I'm sorry for swearing,
Speaker 3: all right.
Speaker 6: Let me relax or stop pressing me.
Speaker 3: I'm trying to chill out. Fucking horrendous.
Speaker 2: If anything's going to solidify that Jed is only twenty
Speaker 2: six years old and still a bit of a child,
Speaker 2: it's getting in trouble by his mother. That's what's going
Speaker 2: to do it, right, Oh, Jed, We're so tired it
Speaker 2: our brains have turned into fucking mashed potato. Now that's
Speaker 2: where we're at.
Speaker 3: Because this episode went for four hours.
Speaker 2: It did, it went for so long, But okay, can
Speaker 2: we just say we're loving all the mums. Another mum
Speaker 2: that we love, which we should mention, is Alissier's mum,
Speaker 2: And you.
Speaker 3: Call me weird for focusing on the mums.
Speaker 2: Elizia's mum didn't even come and she's still great. I
Speaker 2: think she also knows and understands a bit more about
Speaker 2: reality TV than most.
Speaker 7: What about your mum?
Speaker 1: She coming, No, my mom thinks commercial TV is just
Speaker 1: an absolute crop of shi T.
Speaker 3: She definitely watched our season and thought, I'm definitely not
Speaker 3: getting involved in that shit.
Speaker 2: Also, don't you just love that Alyssia's family are so perfect,
Speaker 2: Like they look like they've walked out of a Vogue magazine.
Speaker 2: Alysia's dad walks in with tied around I feel.
Speaker 3: Lives that producers. Do you think they were like, hey,
Speaker 3: it's a bit nippy and there put this on? Was
Speaker 3: that his own wardrobe? Do you think?
Speaker 2: I don't know, do they normally change what?
Speaker 7: Like?
Speaker 2: Does a wardrobe change what your parents are wearing?
Speaker 4: Well?
Speaker 3: Maybe because it was just it was just so like
Speaker 3: proper preppy.
Speaker 2: Well, it couldn't be more chalk and cheese. And like,
Speaker 2: I think Jed has picked two very well put together
Speaker 2: women who, like you know, they seem very classy in
Speaker 2: the way that they dress and the way that they
Speaker 2: style themselves. They're not particularly alternate looking women, and I
Speaker 2: think he has a very alternate looking style. By meeting
Speaker 2: Alyssia's parents and will Unlissia's dad and her brother, I
Speaker 2: think it really highlights just how proper they appear, and
Speaker 2: it kind of like shows how much that they are
Speaker 2: chalk and cheese. That's what was That's what was achieved
Speaker 2: by that little hometown.
Speaker 3: But to me, it also just highlighted how boomers can be.
Speaker 3: You know, who cares that Jed.
Speaker 2: Don't offend all the boomers listening to this podcast episode
Speaker 2: that might be our target market.
Speaker 3: We don't know, Carol, apologies.
Speaker 2: Mom's out there. Apologies.
Speaker 3: Well there was there was examples of two boomers. One
Speaker 3: was a bit judgy, Alyssia's dad, and then we have
Speaker 3: the beautiful dad of Angela.
Speaker 2: No, no, no, we're not there yet.
Speaker 3: Oh where are we?
Speaker 2: Well, we're at the part where Alysia still doesn't know
Speaker 2: whether she She's like, I'm not getting married.
Speaker 3: I'm so sorry. I was like, yeah, come on, that
Speaker 3: chat's boring. Let's talk about the beautiful dad of Angela.
Speaker 2: Okay, sorry, you steamroll the jeopardy. Alicia has made it
Speaker 2: very clear, but she is not going to say yes
Speaker 2: to Jed's proposally.
Speaker 3: To get it, we get it. Jed's gonna propose. Jed's
Speaker 3: not going to propose. I guarantee it. I'll eat my
Speaker 3: own ship if he proposes.
Speaker 2: Can we stop eating?
Speaker 3: I just want to eat shit? So bad ship on me.
Speaker 3: I'll do something crazy, like I don't know, like my
Speaker 3: own ship. Remember, you could shoot on me.
Speaker 2: It's so hot in here, Matt. Matt's been holding his
Speaker 2: breath and it's hot. There's no brain cells left.
Speaker 3: I know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2: No, you don't.
Speaker 3: I regret nothing. I stand by my comments. I will
Speaker 3: live stream a ship eating after the finale on my instagrams.
Speaker 2: Shut up, okay, stop, okay, stop stop talking.
Speaker 3: Stop.
Speaker 2: So I feel like Jed has gotten a bit confused.
Speaker 3: No one cares Laura, No one cares about about the
Speaker 3: storyline of the proposal. We know that he's going to
Speaker 3: pick we know he's going to pick Alyssia up. We
Speaker 3: know he's not going to propose.
Speaker 2: Okay, but I feel like he has gotten confused as
Speaker 2: to whether he's going to be in a relationship with
Speaker 2: a woman or a ring.
Speaker 1: Well, this is a bit of a bloody disaster right
Speaker 1: now because the ring is endgame for me.
Speaker 3: I thought Alizia was endgame.
Speaker 2: But if the ring is off.
Speaker 3: The table, I'm I'm not sure he's going to pick.
Speaker 2: The ring at the end, He's going like, Alysia walks away,
Speaker 2: what's the other one saying? Georgia, Georgia? Is it Georgia.
Speaker 3: Angela, It's the end of the season.
Speaker 2: They both leave and he's like to the Ring, He's like,
Speaker 2: it was you all along. Will you spend the rest
Speaker 2: of your life with me? And then he just like
Speaker 2: you know, punk rocks out of there, him and his ring, and.
Speaker 3: You have a go at me for coming up with
Speaker 3: these weird storylines in your head.
Speaker 2: That's just gonna happen. They run away, Jed and the
Speaker 2: Ring are still really happy to get someone. Slid to
Speaker 2: my DMS and told me it's going strong anyway.
Speaker 3: You're so funny.
Speaker 2: What was next?
Speaker 3: Oh you're cute? Shut up, you're so cute. I'm tough.
Speaker 2: I love you, thank you, I love you, thank you
Speaker 2: so much. Remember the time that I told you I
Speaker 2: loved you and you said thank you?
Speaker 3: When was that? Now?
Speaker 2: I said, I'm falling in love with you and I said,
Speaker 2: and you said thank you, falling.
Speaker 3: In love with you? To me, that means nothing, NONI
Speaker 3: that is thank you, thank you. It's a very kind response.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so we come off the dumpster fire that is
Speaker 2: Alyssia's day. Alyssia's dad was also particularly mean to Jed.
Speaker 2: We didn't cover that. We didn't cover that ground, ashole,
Speaker 2: but he was very judgmental of Jed, and we didn't.
Speaker 2: We don't have time for that. We want people who
Speaker 2: are accepting and open, and you know what's supportive of
Speaker 2: our little Jeddie boy.
Speaker 3: Like Angela's dad, who also when he first appears on camera,
Speaker 3: does also seem very preppy. I thought it was going
Speaker 3: to be like another boomer, but he's a beautiful.
Speaker 2: Man and I'm surprised. And I'll say this, I thought
Speaker 2: Angela's family. I thought Angela, being that she was like
Speaker 2: Tennis and she also is a bit preppy, I thought
Speaker 2: that they would be the ones that would be the
Speaker 2: most kind of I guess like put off by the
Speaker 2: fact that Jed is a bit alternate. But Angela's dad,
Speaker 2: I was in tears. I cried.
Speaker 3: It was beautiful.
Speaker 2: I am pathetic and I cried. And do you know
Speaker 2: what I thought was so beautiful about this? It was
Speaker 2: the fact that I think Angela's dad was also hitting
Speaker 2: on Jed.
Speaker 3: The nails, yeah, the nosering, yeah, the tats. By the way,
Speaker 3: I love this one here, Oh thank you.
Speaker 6: I don't judge a book voice cover, so I'm happy
Speaker 6: to put all out aside.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think you're fairly attractive guy. So what is happening?
Speaker 2: And then Jed runs away with Angela's dad and the
Speaker 2: ring and now they are all living happily. I didn't
Speaker 2: want to spoil it. I didn't want to give that little,
Speaker 2: that little tidbit away.
Speaker 3: I mean, it's been a wild season. I wouldn't put
Speaker 3: it past producers to suggest.
Speaker 2: It, Okay, But the thing that I wanted to bring
Speaker 2: off the back of this day, back of this hometown, well, I.
Speaker 3: Feel like this is a very serious comment.
Speaker 2: Yes, Jed has fucked himself. Do you know why?
Speaker 3: Why?
Speaker 2: Because so Angela and Jed had this really beautiful moment
Speaker 2: at the end where Angela tells Jed that she's falling
Speaker 2: in love with him and Jed says the same thing back.
Speaker 2: He's like, you know, I've been waiting for you to
Speaker 2: say it, and now he's all in with his emotions.
Speaker 2: He's done it to both girls. He's not a lucky Gilbert.
Speaker 2: He's literally said I love you to both Angela and Alicia.
Speaker 2: Both of those girls are going into the finale. They
Speaker 2: are coming into Sunday red hot and ready thinking that
Speaker 2: they're the ones because he's basically said I'm picking you
Speaker 2: without saying I'm picking you.
Speaker 3: Do you know what, though, I do think Angela is
Speaker 3: kind of just going with the flow. I don't think
Speaker 3: she's into Jed as much as Alicia is into Jed.
Speaker 3: I don't know, no, I know I know it.
Speaker 2: Going back to Lysia for one second, I know that
Speaker 2: you're very tired of the whole proposal line. I know
Speaker 2: you're bored. I know I'm just going to standing through this.
Speaker 2: It was a little grab. I wanted to throw it
Speaker 2: in there. Here it is. I really like, once again
Speaker 2: the same thing with Kiki. I really like how strong
Speaker 2: and independent the women are being and how they're not
Speaker 2: being pushed around or pulled around by the production of
Speaker 2: the show. They're not just saying that they want to
Speaker 2: do something or that they will do something to be
Speaker 2: chosen in the end, and I think that is incredibly admirable.
Speaker 5: I was not aware of a proposal prior to coming here,
Speaker 5: and I don't plan on leaving with one just because
Speaker 5: it's a television show.
Speaker 2: Ah say it's sister. I just love it. I love
Speaker 2: that there are so many women on this season who
Speaker 2: are not saying the things that they think they need
Speaker 2: to say to win. They are being honest, and I
Speaker 2: think it's really changed the dynamic of the show. It's
Speaker 2: made it more interesting to watch because instead of everyone
Speaker 2: just vying for the bachelor's and then being like, who
Speaker 2: I get to take the pick of the litter? Even Jesse, Like,
Speaker 2: all these women are being really strong in their opinions
Speaker 2: and in what it is that they want, even though
Speaker 2: some of them don't know exactly what they want, they're
Speaker 2: still communicating that, and I think that that's really incredible
Speaker 2: and something that we've never seen on past seasons.
Speaker 3: I agree, I've got a little, I agree, I agree,
Speaker 3: I've got a lot of.
Speaker 5: You.
Speaker 2: Okay, I agree, you are literally rubbing your nipples at
Speaker 2: the same time. I agree.
Speaker 3: What I'm trying to say is I'm morning. I agree,
Speaker 3: that's great, I'm all for it.
Speaker 2: All right, what's the next Then we're going to.
Speaker 3: Talk about I cannot believe the mess we are in
Speaker 3: right now at the end of the show. This is
Speaker 3: the second last episode of the season, and guess who
Speaker 3: is back. I'm talking about Damien.
Speaker 2: Oh my days.
Speaker 3: I just don't understand in what world there's Jess Livin
Speaker 3: where she thinks it's a good idea to meet Felix's
Speaker 3: parents and bring along I don't want to swear, but
Speaker 3: her fucking boyfriend.
Speaker 2: I don't think it was her decision.
Speaker 3: No, n you know, she could have easily have said hey,
Speaker 3: in Oa in the hotel room, she met her brothers
Speaker 3: and then Damien came in. And I also want to
Speaker 3: say I feel sorry for Jess's brothers who got dragged
Speaker 3: along and didn't say a freaking thing the whole time.
Speaker 2: Could you imagine being Jess's brothers in that situation. It
Speaker 2: would have been absolutely mortifying. They would have just been
Speaker 2: sitting there going like, oh, look, we think the whole
Speaker 2: thing's cooked. We're sorry.
Speaker 3: I'm sure they do.
Speaker 2: We agree with you, but we love her, but this
Speaker 2: is a terrible situation.
Speaker 3: She could have said to Damien before she met the
Speaker 3: family with Felix, I don't think it's appropriate that you
Speaker 3: come along with me. I'm gonna go with my family only, Like,
Speaker 3: how did Jess think that was going to play out?
Speaker 3: When she's like, this is a really big moment and
Speaker 3: it has found me to like me. No, she's like,
Speaker 3: here's my freaking boyfriend.
Speaker 2: I don't I think that it was completely produced. I
Speaker 2: feel like Damien has always been a part of the storyline,
Speaker 2: as in, like when Jess signed up to do it,
Speaker 2: I feel like him coming on the show was always
Speaker 2: produced in like, I feel like it has to be.
Speaker 2: But you know, no, there's no way that she is
Speaker 2: that level of delusional that she would have thought that
Speaker 2: Felix's family would be okay with her bringing her boyfriend
Speaker 2: along like this it has to be produced.
Speaker 3: She could have said, hey, I don't want to go
Speaker 3: ahead with this if I have to walk into that
Speaker 3: room with Damien by my side. She could have said,
Speaker 3: this is this is not how it's going to happen.
Speaker 3: Look at Lysia. Alyssia's you know, she's strong, independent, she's
Speaker 3: making her own choices, and her mom does.
Speaker 2: Think commercial TV is a Crocors shit, So she wasn't there.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And I bet you, I bet you. Alyssia's mom
Speaker 3: is like, I told you so, look at this hot mess.
Speaker 2: Do you know what? Though, Okay, this was, I feel
Speaker 2: like this is really where Damien's people's feelings towards him.
Speaker 2: I think everyone always thought it was a bit, you know,
Speaker 2: it's a bit of an unusual setup, but I think
Speaker 2: people's feelings towards the relationship that they seem to have.
Speaker 2: And obviously we can only see what plays it on TV.
Speaker 2: It's all produced, it's all edited. We totally appreciate that.
Speaker 2: But I almost find that the way that he communicates
Speaker 2: with Jess by saying like, you don't have to make
Speaker 2: any decisions. You can be in a relationship with me,
Speaker 2: but you can have everything else. At the same time,
Speaker 2: he's almost creating an environment where she's not able to
Speaker 2: make decisions, she's not able to assert herself because she's
Speaker 2: so frightened of hurting someone.
Speaker 3: She's so the repercussions of her actions.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and like the severity of like losing that one
Speaker 2: person who's making himself available no matter what she does.
Speaker 2: It almost feels like softly manipulative. And I don't know
Speaker 2: how to describe it, because it was just something about
Speaker 2: that whole environment that made me feel really uncomfortable. And
Speaker 2: especially when Felix, who has boundaries, he doesn't want to
Speaker 2: be in an open relationship, he wants monogamy. He's kind
Speaker 2: of been led down the garden path a little bit
Speaker 2: and he's saying, cool, I want some boundaries put in
Speaker 2: place there. But Damien isn't allowing Felix to have any boundaries,
Speaker 2: and that feels real controlling of this situation.
Speaker 3: But how are we back here now? The last episode,
Speaker 3: I thought the narrative was Jess saying, I'm falling in
Speaker 3: love with you. By the way, I'm going to end
Speaker 3: it with Damien, I'm not going to have sex with him,
Speaker 3: and then all of a sudden, we're still back to
Speaker 3: day one, like it's just gone full circle.
Speaker 2: Considering everything, I feel like Felix is taking it really well.
Speaker 2: Ah okay, but once again Felix's mum. Felix's mum comes
Speaker 2: in with the goods. She is harsh, she is very
Speaker 2: critical of Jess, And you know what, I don't think
Speaker 2: necessarily going in hard on Jess is fair, But I
Speaker 2: think Jess needs a little bit of a wake up
Speaker 2: that she's being a little bit deluded about the outcome
Speaker 2: because she keeps flip flopping between these two options and
Speaker 2: hasn't really been able to make any decisions. And look,
Speaker 2: Felix's mum has a lot to say about it. Do
Speaker 2: you not wos me.
Speaker 7: Why you keep referring to it as an experience. It
Speaker 7: comes across as not sincere A relationship is not an experience.
Speaker 7: I feel don't mean like you've been used for an
Speaker 7: experience in Felix. I don't want Felix to be used
Speaker 7: as an experience. You're going to move on to another experience.
Speaker 7: You are a girl of experiences.
Speaker 2: Holy shit, that's a really mean That was like, I
Speaker 2: feel like that was mean.
Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, parts of that I agree with, but I also, yeah,
Speaker 3: it's pretty full on. I thought I thought they were
Speaker 3: about to start going at it.
Speaker 2: And then Felix's mum holds it to the ground and
Speaker 2: starts they have a full beer dumping on her head. Yeah, like,
Speaker 2: what's Carl Stefanovic and yeah, She's like can't. That's just
Speaker 2: in the car part. They'll be hitting each other.
Speaker 3: Damian Felix start wrestling, and then the brothers of Jess
Speaker 3: are like, oh god.
Speaker 2: Well they just cracked a beer open and are standing
Speaker 2: on the silence. Was filming it and sending it to
Speaker 2: Daily Mail. It's really spiral out of control. It's going
Speaker 2: to be in the papers tomorrow, like it was a lot.
Speaker 2: Felix's Mum's okay though, but she she won obviously. Yeah.
Speaker 3: Can I just say I think why people are getting
Speaker 3: frustrated right now is because we've had an example of
Speaker 3: Thomas wanting to be with someone with an understanding that
Speaker 3: they don't have the same wants and needs, i e.
Speaker 3: He wants kids, Kiki doesn't. So then he can say, hey,
Speaker 3: do you know what, we're not aligned. It's not gonna work.
Speaker 3: I'm going to say goodbye. As hard as that is.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And I think also with what you're saying, like
Speaker 2: Thomas really I think, I mean, obviously it could be eady,
Speaker 2: but I think he really wanted to pick Kiky. I agree,
Speaker 2: And it was only that that was like such a
Speaker 2: glaringly obvious thing that did not Onligne for them that
Speaker 2: he was like, well, this is not going to work.
Speaker 3: Out for us, okay, And when I say this, I
Speaker 3: know that I'm just stealing. How you have you know,
Speaker 3: digested the whole situation and how you think it's playing out.
Speaker 3: But I think for Felix it's more about just wanting
Speaker 3: to win. It's that competitor inside of him, rather than
Speaker 3: it actually being a case of him wanting to be
Speaker 3: with a woman that he's fallen in love with.
Speaker 2: They are a monumentally bad match. Like them as a couple,
Speaker 2: it doesn't work. And the fact not only is they
Speaker 2: haven't even spoken about the fact that they live on
Speaker 2: opposite sides of the country. They don't need to talk
Speaker 2: about that because the other jeopardy that they have in
Speaker 2: their relationship is already so ridiculously big that that hasn't
Speaker 2: even gotten a look in, like how are they going
Speaker 2: to navigate long distance? But for me, I'm like, I
Speaker 2: think exactly what you said, Matt, and I know that
Speaker 2: you took it from something I said earlier. But Felix
Speaker 2: wants to win. There's a person here to compete against.
Speaker 2: He was this professional sportsperson like he wants the woman
Speaker 2: who there is a chase for and he wants at
Speaker 2: the end of this for Jess to say I choose you,
Speaker 2: even though she's saying repeatedly over and over again that
Speaker 2: you know, I don't know if I can choose you.
Speaker 2: I don't know if I want it. Could you imach it?
Speaker 2: Picking the person who is saying to your face, I
Speaker 2: am in love with someone else and will probably have
Speaker 2: sex with them.
Speaker 3: It's absolutely insane. But do you think that I don't
Speaker 3: know if it's just me. But does Felix kind of
Speaker 3: enjoy being in these situations where Damien is also there,
Speaker 3: Like do you think that he's like, maybe.
Speaker 2: They're all together now, maybe the three of them are
Speaker 2: in a relationship. Maybe they are, and that's gonna be
Speaker 2: the big block twist at the edge.
Speaker 3: That Felix and Damien end up hooking up. Is that,
Speaker 3: Oh my god, that'd be amazing. I freaking hope, so.
Speaker 2: I will subscribe to that because.
Speaker 3: Because no one is picked at the end of this episode,
Speaker 3: it's like it's all like, oh, what's gonna It's gonna happen.
Speaker 2: Okay, we're at this point, though, who do you think
Speaker 2: is going to win?
Speaker 5: Now?
Speaker 2: Like, who are your final three and I'll tell you
Speaker 2: my final.
Speaker 3: Three, Okay, starting with Jed is gonna pick Alicia. I
Speaker 3: think Thomas is going to pick well, I'm torn. I
Speaker 3: think it'll be Leah. Really, I think it will. I
Speaker 3: think he'll go to say option okay, and then and
Speaker 3: then Felix because I bless him.
Speaker 2: That's an idiot.
Speaker 3: He is an idiot. I think you'll pick Jess.
Speaker 2: Okay, right, I'm gonna say Felix is gonna pick Jess.
Speaker 2: Wild if he does not pick Abigail and he picks Jess,
Speaker 2: like we will riot. But I think he's gonna pick Jess.
Speaker 2: I think that Jed is going to pick Angela. Oh
Speaker 2: shut up, I don't believe it. I know he's gonna
Speaker 2: pick this year. But like, I'm gonna just go for
Speaker 2: something different. You know, I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna
Speaker 2: be that person.
Speaker 3: Please come Angela.
Speaker 2: Okay, I think Jed's gonna pick Angela this yeah, but Angela.
Speaker 2: And I think that Thomas is going to pick Lauren.
Speaker 2: Also not convinced, but like we'll just go with that.
Speaker 2: But you know what, Okay, so this is the second
Speaker 2: last episode, right, we do have one more, obviously because
Speaker 2: there's a final episode coming out, Thank god, it's the
Speaker 2: last one. Just you know, we'll put that in there
Speaker 2: as well.
Speaker 3: I think it's fair to say that we will not
Speaker 3: be doing interviews with some of the contestants.
Speaker 2: We got given a teaser at the end of this episode.
Speaker 2: There was a little sprinkling. We got to get an
Speaker 2: insight of what goes down on the final episode.
Speaker 3: It's absolutely insane.
Speaker 2: And gears back. So by the looks of things, Damien
Speaker 2: is going to be there at the very final rose
Speaker 2: ceremony so that he can hear what Jess has to say.
Speaker 2: That is the most awkward, Like, who is the producer
Speaker 2: who thought this up?
Speaker 3: Genius?
Speaker 2: They need a pay rose. I can't wait, and I
Speaker 2: can I know that, but it's going to be great.
Speaker 3: Can we have sex now?
Speaker 2: Can you stop talking about sex? No, We've been recording
Speaker 2: this for an hour and a half and we've watched
Speaker 2: four hours of The Bachelor today and believe it or not,
Speaker 2: that's not what I need to get aroused tomorrow.
Speaker 3: It is okay perfect. Will we record on the Sunday
Speaker 3: night after the episode so it'll come out Monday.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's gonna be hell, it's gonna be hell on Earth.
Speaker 2: I can wait Sunday's episode. We're gonna watch it. We're
Speaker 2: gonna take ella notes, we're gonna take it very seriously,
Speaker 2: and we're gonna record straight after, and then I'm going
Speaker 2: to edit into the night and it will be in
Speaker 2: your inboxes on Monday morning next week, babies. And then
Speaker 2: guess what else, We are back with Life on Cut
Speaker 2: on Tuesday. It'll be our very first episode back with
Speaker 2: britt because she'll be back in the country and I
Speaker 2: cannot wait to drill her about her boyfriend.
Speaker 3: What's his name? Ben?
Speaker 2: Ben?
Speaker 3: Then?
Speaker 2: Who Ben? The soccer player? I don't know. Do you
Speaker 2: need to know people's last name?
Speaker 3: I was just testing you.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's Ben. He's very nice, but he lives very
Speaker 2: far away.
Speaker 3: Oh is a bit of an isn't it.
Speaker 2: She does like long distance. She's very happy, very happy.
Speaker 2: But you know what, I'm gonna leave it all for
Speaker 2: Brittany to tell you herself, because I will get to
Speaker 2: the bottom of it all.
Speaker 3: And I'll be staying as far away from this podcast
Speaker 3: equipment as I can, as well as a bottle of gin.
Speaker 3: No more gin, I'm ginless after this.
Speaker 2: Yeah, we've had enough, We've had don' don't make this
Speaker 2: do anymore anyway. Guys. That is it from us. If
Speaker 2: you've loved batch on cart please go you know the drill,
Speaker 2: leave a review, share it with your friends, you know,
Speaker 2: just share it around to.
Speaker 3: Share it with Damien.
Speaker 2: I'm back.
Speaker 3: And and to Felix's mum what's her name, Susan
Speaker 2: Who knows Carol, And share the love because we love
Speaker 2: love