WEBVTT - MINI: Alternative Census

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<v Speaker 1>I Heart podcasts, hear more gold podcast playlists and listen

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<v Speaker 1>live on the free I Heart app Got anything good? Hey,

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<v Speaker 1>this is the Christian O'Connell Show podcast seven days time.

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<v Speaker 1>It's the National Census and already people who are getting

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<v Speaker 1>it in early. But the whole idea is it's a

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<v Speaker 1>snapshot of what is happening in Australian households at the

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<v Speaker 1>same time. You know, it's kind of interesting, isn't it.

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<v Speaker 1>Ind In the UK we do it every ten years.

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<v Speaker 1>Here it's like every five years. They want to be

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<v Speaker 1>snooping around, going how many people are in there asleep

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<v Speaker 1>right now? What are you all up to in there?

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<v Speaker 1>And it's compulsory, so is there a fine Yeah?

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<v Speaker 2>I think it's like three hundred and fifty bucks. I

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<v Speaker 2>think sleep here. Yeah, every day you don't fill it in.

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<v Speaker 1>So next Tuesday's Breakfast Show, the morning of the National Census,

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<v Speaker 1>are ready conducting our own Christian O'Connell Show Census seven questions,

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<v Speaker 1>one every half an hour, starting at six am, and

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<v Speaker 1>I want you all this is a bit snapshot again.

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<v Speaker 1>The show goes live into all the big five cities

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<v Speaker 1>and beyond as well. I want everyone to actually answer

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<v Speaker 1>the questions at the same time, so we get our

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<v Speaker 1>own data and stats. Our questions are being made with you, guys,

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<v Speaker 1>They're not going to be the same as how many

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<v Speaker 1>people are in there? All right, Ria, what do you

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<v Speaker 1>think we should be asking? Then? And I'll don't forget

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<v Speaker 1>this is an opportunity to ask the nation your questions.

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<v Speaker 1>So if you've got a question the next couple of

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<v Speaker 1>minutes that you'd like to be one of the seven

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<v Speaker 1>that we're going to ask next week on the show

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<v Speaker 1>the morning of the National Census, text me now four

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<v Speaker 1>seven five three one oh four three.

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<v Speaker 3>I would love to know is there anyone under eighteen

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<v Speaker 3>with the name of Bruce. I feel like Bruce is

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<v Speaker 3>a dying out name. I've never seen a young Bruce.

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<v Speaker 3>Is there one in Australia?

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<v Speaker 1>You're right, a lot of those, like older guy names

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<v Speaker 1>are passing out. But on the on the naming young

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<v Speaker 1>girl babies, you get a lot of the old like

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<v Speaker 1>Matilda and Lotty and some of those older names. Violent. Yeah, yes,

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<v Speaker 1>violence that there's loads of little violence. Now, Patsy, what

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<v Speaker 1>do you think we should ask a nation?

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<v Speaker 4>I'd like to know if they like soft or hard tacos?

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<v Speaker 1>Oh, that's a great one.

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<v Speaker 2>Or like the little girl says, dos is it hard?

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<v Speaker 1>Is it? So? You know you can do both?

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah? I know you can.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know.

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<v Speaker 4>That's a sweend is a mighty in our house. Like

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<v Speaker 4>I like a hard one.

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<v Speaker 1>But the other that crunch.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, I love the crunch.

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<v Speaker 2>Tricky to get right though. I agree with you.

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<v Speaker 3>But when you put it in the oven, you've got

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<v Speaker 3>to get those little dividers in perfectly.

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<v Speaker 1>Otherwise it's only thirty to forty seconds in there. What

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<v Speaker 1>kind of chef I if you can't handle that? It's

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<v Speaker 1>two steps, stricky, it's tricky. It comes with a divider.

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<v Speaker 1>It's tricky.

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<v Speaker 2>It's tricky.

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<v Speaker 1>God is it going to be okay? Solved? It too hard?

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<v Speaker 1>Put it back in.

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<v Speaker 4>There's always shells left in our own we forget this.

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<v Speaker 1>I prefer the sensation of hard is better, but it

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<v Speaker 1>needs a lot of mess.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, cracks in the middle.

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<v Speaker 1>They always do. The structural integrity isn't great for those things?

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<v Speaker 1>Is it? First bite and then it all just collapses?

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<v Speaker 1>There's nothing else. Then then you're just using it as

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<v Speaker 1>a dorito. It's like a little scoop. All let's go

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<v Speaker 1>to the chuckle. Sisters. Chuckle, sisters, what do you want

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<v Speaker 1>to ask the nation? What's the weirdest thing in your freezer?

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<v Speaker 1>That is a good question. I feel like you forget

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<v Speaker 1>about all the things that you pop in your freezer.

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<v Speaker 4>Some people they go, oh, I better.

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<v Speaker 1>Freeze this for long term.

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<v Speaker 3>Like my mum used to freeze our baby teeth because

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<v Speaker 3>she thought it would preserve it longer.

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<v Speaker 2>What why would you need to preserve it?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, because their teeth they last phrases. I mean when

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<v Speaker 1>they find a body, that's what they look at the

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<v Speaker 1>dental records trying to work out who it is. They

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<v Speaker 1>last for decades. No idea why she just always for

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<v Speaker 1>had them in the freezer. I dig up some old

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<v Speaker 1>ancient man or something. He's still got his teeth. Oh,

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<v Speaker 1>he must have been preserved in an ancient freezer.

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<v Speaker 2>Maybe I've been tweeted the teeth.

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<v Speaker 1>You're right, those nice necklaces, they're still rocking and sharp teeth.

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<v Speaker 1>I like the question, though, Yes, I feel like we

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<v Speaker 1>get some quirky thing. No, no, no, I guarantee there's

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<v Speaker 1>some people listen to the show that I've got decease pet.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, like a budgy or no, yeah, yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>This haven't got round to actually saying goodbye or taxi

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<v Speaker 1>doming it or bearing it. It's in the freezer somewhere, sady,

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<v Speaker 1>I reckon.

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<v Speaker 2>Next to the peace, next to you.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, And also how many times he's feel smoked? Like,

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<v Speaker 1>do you know what I've made extra our freezer six months?

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<v Speaker 1>What the hell is it? It all looks the same,

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<v Speaker 1>doesn't it? Hurry spag bol chili. I don't know what

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<v Speaker 1>this is, cathead, it's a mystery dinner. Isn't he thawing

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<v Speaker 1>it out? I don't what do you think it is?

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<v Speaker 1>It's bubbles? Tina chuckles, Sister Tina, what do we ask

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<v Speaker 1>in the nation? I just want to know what a

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<v Speaker 1>last is a good question as well. I've got one.

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<v Speaker 1>What smell, guys, reminds you of your childhood's chlorine? For me,

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<v Speaker 1>it's going swimming. I love that even now when I

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<v Speaker 1>smell it, you know, and that rich kind of acidic smell.

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<v Speaker 1>You know. Sometimes you check it into cheap hotel and

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<v Speaker 1>they go, there's a poor we got you don't need totain.

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<v Speaker 1>It's burning in the back of my throat right now,

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<v Speaker 1>and it's like tongues of chlorine. It makes me so happy.

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<v Speaker 3>It's a bit triggering as well, because it reminds me

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<v Speaker 3>of school swimming carnivals, which there are still.

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<v Speaker 1>There are a lot of us out there right now

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<v Speaker 1>in the world trying to put ourselves back together, getting

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<v Speaker 1>up at four am, trying to find some form of

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<v Speaker 1>validation the other side world, anywhere where there's a microphone.

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<v Speaker 1>The other one I would want to ask the nation is,

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<v Speaker 1>if anything was to happen to you, all right, in

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<v Speaker 1>suspicious circumstances, which TV detective would you want to solve

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<v Speaker 1>your murder? Who? And why? All right? So next Tuesday,

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<v Speaker 1>on the morning of the Census, on this breakfast show

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<v Speaker 1>we're going to do are obviously unofficial census. We're gonna

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<v Speaker 1>ask seven questions, one every half an hour. Your chance

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<v Speaker 1>to ask the nation something. What do you want one

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<v Speaker 1>of the questions to be? Text me oh four seven

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<v Speaker 1>five three one oh four three. Here's another one. It's

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<v Speaker 1>going to chuck chuck it. It's on my mind right now.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know. Why would you pay ninety nine dollars

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<v Speaker 1>for the pleasure of listening to the show exactly seven

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<v Speaker 1>days time it is the census. The morning of the

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<v Speaker 1>census will have in our own highly unofficial one seven questions,

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<v Speaker 1>one question every half an hour as we ask the nation,

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<v Speaker 1>We're going to make the seven questions with you guys.

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<v Speaker 1>The number one question by far about eighty percent of

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<v Speaker 1>people texting the show right now or want to know

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<v Speaker 1>about toilet paper. Whether you're over under?

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<v Speaker 2>Ah?

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<v Speaker 3>I think this is so straightforward. Surely it's so who

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<v Speaker 3>on earth would go under?

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<v Speaker 1>And then it's two parts. Second part, are you a

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<v Speaker 1>scruncher or folder? Do we really want to be going

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<v Speaker 1>into the backside of Australia.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't need that.

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<v Speaker 1>Christian, my colleague has a one year old son named Bruce.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh one year old?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, wow, yep yeah. The biggest thing toilet paper, toilet

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<v Speaker 1>paper over under, toilet paper? Butter or Margarine?

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<v Speaker 4>Who?

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<v Speaker 2>Surely butter butter?

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<v Speaker 1>Christian? Can we get the official answer to kitkats and no?

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<v Speaker 1>Last week it was but Kitkats in the fridge? Yes

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<v Speaker 1>or no? Also? Can we find out Australia's least favorite

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<v Speaker 1>chocolate bar? Surely Bounty rich along with you Bounty dessiccated

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<v Speaker 1>chopped up coconut. All right, let's find out Ausra is

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<v Speaker 1>theleast favorite chocolate bar. I bet you one. Hundred dollars.

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<v Speaker 1>It's a bounty bar rio. No way.

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<v Speaker 3>The good people of Australia will love a bounty Christian.

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<v Speaker 1>I to know is there any one of them the

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<v Speaker 1>forty other than myself who stool drives manual Christian Census question?

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<v Speaker 1>Who owns a Victor lawnmower? Christian Omo users need to

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<v Speaker 1>be careful. There is a rumor lonely housewives would put

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<v Speaker 1>a pack of Homo in the window if they were

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<v Speaker 1>looking to have an affair.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, in the window.

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<v Speaker 4>We've got one up on our leitch of our laundry window.

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<v Speaker 4>That's a bit up down.

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<v Speaker 1>I have as well. Apparently, Homo, according to the rumor,

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<v Speaker 1>stands for old man out what m o?

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<v Speaker 2>Old man out? Home on you?

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<v Speaker 1>All right? Keith is coming. Then we're looking for seven questions.

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<v Speaker 1>So a's the nation next week for our unofficial census.

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<v Speaker 1>What do you think we should ask everybody? Fur seventy

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<v Speaker 1>five three? One oh four three? I've got one as well.

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<v Speaker 1>What age? Give me an instant answer? What age would

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<v Speaker 1>you say your happiest?

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<v Speaker 2>Oh twenty one?

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<v Speaker 4>Oh wow, that's I'd say forty three.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm going to ask why forty three?

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<v Speaker 4>Why forty three? Because I had just come out of

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<v Speaker 4>cancer and I was given the all clear, and I

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<v Speaker 4>had a beautiful toddler and a gorgeous husband and a

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<v Speaker 4>great job, and it was like a second breath of life. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 4>for me, it was a second chance. It was my

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<v Speaker 4>second chance and made me not sweat the small stuff.

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<v Speaker 1>That's a great answer. I'm definitely gonna put that question now.

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<v Speaker 1>Why twenty one for you?

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<v Speaker 2>Mine's not as moving as that mine.

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<v Speaker 1>It was still moving for you. Yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>It was my first year at college in America.

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<v Speaker 3>I went to Wisconsin and spent a year there, and

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<v Speaker 3>that was the best one of my lit experience.

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<v Speaker 1>To do that at such a young age.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it was amazing.

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<v Speaker 3>I was a twenty one year old as well, and

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<v Speaker 3>I was the only one that could buy alcohol, so

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<v Speaker 3>I was immediately incredibly popular on King campus.

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<v Speaker 2>Exactly.

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<v Speaker 1>No wonder you went back to twenty one party boy,

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<v Speaker 1>this is the origin story of Champagne Rio.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, formative year.

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<v Speaker 1>Mine would be now fifty three. Wow. Really, I just

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<v Speaker 1>appreciate a lot more. You've just seen a lot more

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<v Speaker 1>and you understand a bit more, not much more keyword there,

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<v Speaker 1>bit more. Mine would be now because I think you

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<v Speaker 1>have a lot more gratitude when you when you're twenty one,

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<v Speaker 1>you take everything for granted. You treat your body for granted.

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<v Speaker 1>You treat your body like a higher cart. You know

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<v Speaker 1>you do. Don't get salmon and or over revenue stuff

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<v Speaker 1>like eh, giving it back in a week's time, putting.

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<v Speaker 2>The wrong oil in, Yeah, you don't.

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<v Speaker 1>Even care, and stuff like that, and suddenly you'll pay

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<v Speaker 1>a big price. So later on we're like, and just

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<v Speaker 1>don't you know when you were young, giving like in

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<v Speaker 1>your twenties that so much energy You never even thought

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<v Speaker 1>about a word like energy and recovery and energy management

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<v Speaker 1>and naps. You just have this unlile. It's like you're

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<v Speaker 1>plugged into some limitless, infinite electricity source.

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<v Speaker 2>And it is like that old saying youth is wasted

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<v Speaker 2>on the on the young.

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<v Speaker 1>It really is. It really is. So I would say

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<v Speaker 1>fifty three, thank you very much everyone. I'm still sending

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<v Speaker 1>in possible questions for our alternative census on the show

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<v Speaker 1>next Tuesday morning. Christian pepsi or coke. People get mad

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<v Speaker 1>if they're a coke fan and they go somewhere, they go,

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<v Speaker 1>we've only got pepsy? Is that? Okay? People seed to

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<v Speaker 1>get really upset by that. Christian. The you my box

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<v Speaker 1>was a common feature in their Navy households. If you

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<v Speaker 1>turn the box upside down, it's also signed for old

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<v Speaker 1>man out or old woman now if you're in the

0:11:29.280 --> 0:11:32.400
<v Speaker 1>market to have an affair. I don't think this is true.

0:11:32.439 --> 0:11:34.479
<v Speaker 1>What year are we in now? Anyway, these days you

0:11:34.520 --> 0:11:37.240
<v Speaker 1>don't worry about that. People people got apps. Yes, yeah,

0:11:37.359 --> 0:11:40.679
<v Speaker 1>they worry about turning detergent boxes upside down. What you're

0:11:40.719 --> 0:11:43.920
<v Speaker 1>gonna meet your next partner who's driving around the suburb

0:11:45.000 --> 0:11:50.200
<v Speaker 1>hearing in windows? That's your next keeper. Christian. I'd like

0:11:50.239 --> 0:11:56.119
<v Speaker 1>to know what Australian's least favorite chore is Christian minus washing,

0:11:56.160 --> 0:12:00.120
<v Speaker 1>separating colors, choosing the right cycle. I get very up

0:12:00.120 --> 0:12:02.720
<v Speaker 1>to friends who don't take it as seriously these favorites.

0:12:02.839 --> 0:12:05.360
<v Speaker 1>Changing the seats sheets, Oh.

0:12:05.319 --> 0:12:09.479
<v Speaker 3>I hate putting the douna back into the dounach pain.

0:12:10.079 --> 0:12:12.239
<v Speaker 1>I still think worse is sorting out the clothes once

0:12:12.280 --> 0:12:12.880
<v Speaker 1>they're all done.

0:12:12.880 --> 0:12:13.920
<v Speaker 2>Oh that no, that sucks.

0:12:14.000 --> 0:12:16.400
<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, that is just a night, especially because

0:12:16.400 --> 0:12:18.519
<v Speaker 1>in my life it's three it's three women. I don't

0:12:18.520 --> 0:12:21.359
<v Speaker 1>know who's who's Oh yes, oh my god. Then they

0:12:21.439 --> 0:12:24.959
<v Speaker 1>get they go. They get angry with me. Isn't I

0:12:25.040 --> 0:12:31.599
<v Speaker 1>can't wear someone don't know? I don't know anything, Christian.

0:12:31.719 --> 0:12:34.240
<v Speaker 1>Census question? Do you have an inny or out each

0:12:34.280 --> 0:12:37.959
<v Speaker 1>belly button? The government needs to know? Any how many

0:12:38.040 --> 0:12:40.120
<v Speaker 1>hours of sept you get you to look every adult?

0:12:40.160 --> 0:12:42.760
<v Speaker 1>It's never enough. That's the only answer, Christian, what about

0:12:42.760 --> 0:12:44.920
<v Speaker 1>this one? I know you'll be strongly on this. Tea bag?

0:12:45.520 --> 0:12:49.440
<v Speaker 1>Is it milk? Then water? Or tea bag? Water? Milk?

0:12:49.920 --> 0:12:51.719
<v Speaker 1>Come on, you should know the right answer by now.

0:12:51.760 --> 0:12:56.840
<v Speaker 1>It's always tea bag. Then you can control the brewing strength. Oh,

0:12:57.199 --> 0:12:59.520
<v Speaker 1>then you then you know how much of the milk

0:12:59.520 --> 0:13:04.199
<v Speaker 1>you're gonna need. Otherwise you're playing with dynamite blindfolded. Please

0:13:04.239 --> 0:13:07.319
<v Speaker 1>don't do that, guys, please please Christian. Chicken or cheese?

0:13:07.760 --> 0:13:10.000
<v Speaker 1>What is Australias favorite twisty flavor?

0:13:10.760 --> 0:13:14.679
<v Speaker 4>Oh that's a good question, the original, haven't you?

0:13:14.920 --> 0:13:15.079
<v Speaker 1>Oh?

0:13:15.160 --> 0:13:18.079
<v Speaker 2>I actually like the chicken, but hate the chicken.

0:13:18.239 --> 0:13:24.079
<v Speaker 1>I love. These questions are great, Keep them coming, Christian

0:13:24.120 --> 0:13:26.839
<v Speaker 1>O'Connell show on podcast,