Speaker 1: Hi, guys, and welcome back to another episode of Life Uncut.
Speaker 1: I'm Laura and I'm Brittany, and today is our second
Speaker 1: episode of the week. It is our quick, down and
Speaker 1: dirty episode where we answer your deep, dark and burning questions.
Speaker 2: We're actually doing something a little bit different today, and
Speaker 2: how do you feel, Laura, because we've gone rogue.
Speaker 1: We are doing the.
Speaker 2: Podcast on my lounge. I have this really, really big lounge.
Speaker 2: We're sitting like a meter and a half away from
Speaker 2: each other. Our legs are curled up on the lounge.
Speaker 2: We've got cushions everywhere. We've never done it like this before.
Speaker 2: We're usually like crammed into a little table and I'm
Speaker 2: on your bed amongst all of your clothes.
Speaker 1: You're making this sound a lot boogier than what it is. Guys.
Speaker 1: We're still budget. Nothing has changed. We're still not making
Speaker 1: enough money from this podcast. We're going to keep on
Speaker 1: doing it exactly how we've done it the whole time,
Speaker 1: which is a mad dash to the finish line. I'll
Speaker 1: stay up to midnight and probably edit this and then
Speaker 1: complain a few times to Brandy about it.
Speaker 2: I'm out there hustle and trying to wrangle some money.
Speaker 2: If you guys are listening, you want to sponsor the
Speaker 2: podcast slide on it.
Speaker 1: Oh wow, I got despert real quick, didn't it.
Speaker 2: Now I'm dying to know. Laura. You just told me
Speaker 2: that something funny happened to you today, but you won't
Speaker 2: tell me what.
Speaker 1: Because you want to do it live on the pod
Speaker 1: like this. Okay, this is what we do. Whenever something
Speaker 1: interesting happens in our life. We don't actually tell each
Speaker 1: other until we sit down with a microphone in the hand.
Speaker 1: I don't know if it's funny, it's traumatic. Today I
Speaker 1: had to go into the city to go and run
Speaker 1: into one of our jewelers who works with us. And
Speaker 1: I ran in and I was like, I'll just park
Speaker 1: an angel place, Like, there's a car park there that
Speaker 1: I know. It's a Wilson car park. It's multi level
Speaker 1: car park right in the city, and anyone knows, like
Speaker 1: just driving into city that in and of itself is
Speaker 1: like a stressful ordeal. So I parked the car and
Speaker 1: I parked on the lowest level of the car park.
Speaker 1: So I got out, I went and did my thing,
Speaker 1: and then I came back and I was waiting for
Speaker 1: the lift and I got into lyft. This is a
Speaker 1: long story.
Speaker 2: I'm here for her though.
Speaker 1: Then I got out and I got out at the
Speaker 1: wrong level, so I was like in the car park,
Speaker 1: but I was at the wrong level. I was at
Speaker 1: like basement two and I was actually meant to be
Speaker 1: at basement seven. So I'm like, oh, I'll just go
Speaker 1: down the fire escape. So I opened the fire escape
Speaker 1: and the door shuts and I walked down a level
Speaker 1: and I was like, I'll just try this door. None
Speaker 1: of the doors worked, none of that.
Speaker 2: Oh my god.
Speaker 1: I was trapped in.
Speaker 2: Pregnant woman waddling up and down like eight flights of stairs.
Speaker 1: Anyway, Eventually I figured out what level. There was one
Speaker 1: level that had an emergency phone on it, and I
Speaker 1: was like calling. The guy finally picks up after twenty
Speaker 1: minutes and he's like hello, and I was like, I'm
Speaker 1: stuck in your fire exit. Thank god there was an
Speaker 1: emergency phone. I was gonna be on the news, this
Speaker 1: pregnant woman died in a fire. Is I buck twice?
Speaker 2: If you're in Milwaukee, hang on my concern here, Okay, no,
Speaker 2: not my main concern. My main concern is your welfare.
Speaker 2: I'm glad you're Okay, no, let's like break this down
Speaker 2: for a second. This is a fire escape. The whole
Speaker 2: purpose is you're supposed to be using it to escape
Speaker 2: a fire.
Speaker 1: Okay. So the issue was is that I walked down
Speaker 1: to the bottom level and I was like, cause that's
Speaker 1: where my cart was, and I was like, okay, I
Speaker 1: can't get out of here. So then I walked back
Speaker 1: up as far as I could before I ran out,
Speaker 1: So I didn't three stairs. I didn't quite make it
Speaker 1: to the very top level, which was like eight flights
Speaker 1: of stairs, but everyone knows that like a car park stairwell,
Speaker 1: it's really two flights to one flight, so we're talking
Speaker 1: like sixteen flights of stairs here. So I didn't quite
Speaker 1: make it to the top level. And then I was like, well,
Speaker 1: maybe i'll just sit here for a while and see
Speaker 1: what happens. That was a bad idea. Nothing happens, So
Speaker 1: then I started walking with no one else is using
Speaker 1: the fire well. So then I walked up further, eventually
Speaker 1: found the phone, and the guy on the phone was like,
Speaker 1: you just need to keep walking up and then eventually
Speaker 1: you'll hit the street and the street exit you can
Speaker 1: exit from. And I was like Okay, thanks for that power.
Speaker 1: But if just in case, you don't hear from me,
Speaker 1: I'm either still trapped to the stairwell or made it
Speaker 1: out alive, like one of the two. This is wrong
Speaker 1: on so many levels. You know, there was no signs either.
Speaker 1: There wasn't a sign that said, hey, if you're stuck
Speaker 1: in the stairwell, please proceed to the very top level
Speaker 1: and you can get out on Pitt Street Mall.
Speaker 2: You should have said that I'm gonna write a letter.
Speaker 1: Can we turn into that angry pregnant woan who writes
Speaker 1: letters now?
Speaker 2: Well, I mean, I feel like this that you just
Speaker 2: called it out to all of Australia is more powerful
Speaker 2: than your letter. But you write that letter.
Speaker 1: Also, I want to point out, guys, I know that
Speaker 1: a lot of you listened to the episode the other
Speaker 1: week where I said that I saw zac Efron in Bondai,
Speaker 1: and I just want to reiterate that it fucking was
Speaker 1: zac Efron because every single media outlet has now reported
Speaker 1: on it. Apparently he's moved to Dover Heights And for
Speaker 1: a while there I was like really second guessing myself.
Speaker 1: I was like, did I make that up? Did I
Speaker 1: like fantasize him into ex Is he really in bond?
Speaker 2: I did not tell me that you were having second doubts.
Speaker 2: You were like, yeah, babes, I saw him, and then
Speaker 2: your internal monologue like, oh.
Speaker 1: Was it him? I said, it was such confidence. But anyway,
Speaker 1: he's actually here, and I feel really privileged that our
Speaker 1: little life on cut community were the very first people
Speaker 1: to know.
Speaker 2: I said to Laura. Once she said that and we
Speaker 2: hung up our microphones for the night, I said, you
Speaker 2: realize what you've just done. I was like, no one
Speaker 2: knows Zack's here. You have just outed him. He's here
Speaker 2: trying to go low key under the radar, and you
Speaker 2: just outed him. And all of a sudden, the next day,
Speaker 2: literally the next day, it was in every news article,
Speaker 2: every media outlet. There were papped photos. The poor guy
Speaker 2: got one secret day and then you fucked it up.
Speaker 1: Would you imagine being zach Efron and some shitty d
Speaker 1: list reality TV stuff ups it up for you.
Speaker 2: Laura's like, I'm going to teach you for turning your
Speaker 2: back on me. No one turns your back on me.
Speaker 1: Oh guys, you know that this is our very quick
Speaker 1: episode for the week, and what we do is we
Speaker 1: answer the questions that you have been writing in for
Speaker 1: the week. So we have three questions that we're going
Speaker 1: to answer for today's episode, and we're going to jump
Speaker 1: straight into them because it's currently six thirty and we
Speaker 1: need to get this episode done before the Bachelorette starts tonight.
Speaker 2: Hell's yeah, we do. I've been with my current partner
Speaker 2: for almost four years, and recently I was talking with
Speaker 2: friends about how we met, and I told them that
Speaker 2: I asked him before we had sex for the very
Speaker 2: first time if he had recently had an STD check
Speaker 2: and if he was clean. The looks they gave me
Speaker 2: and the questions they asked me made me feel really ashamed,
Speaker 2: and I began to question my choices. What are your
Speaker 2: guys thoughts on asking someone about STD checks prior to
Speaker 2: sleeping with someone? Is this normal? Am I that weird?
Speaker 2: Because I won't sleep with someone without knowing if they're clean.
Speaker 1: Why do your friends think this is so weird? That's
Speaker 1: what I want to know. It depends on what kind
Speaker 1: of relationship you're having, I think, Like I mean, obviously,
Speaker 1: if it's a one night stand or something and you
Speaker 1: just there for hangs and bangs, protect yourself, you may
Speaker 1: not get an honest answer anyway. So like you can
Speaker 1: ask the question, they're gonna say, yes, Yeah, you can
Speaker 1: ask the question. I'm not going to put my money
Speaker 1: on that that answer might be true. So I think
Speaker 1: that you in and of yourself need to take whatever
Speaker 1: precautions you can. But if you guys, have been on
Speaker 1: a few dates and you're taking it slow, and you
Speaker 1: know you've kind of hit the five date mark and
Speaker 1: you're gearing up for sexy times, and I don't think
Speaker 1: that there's anything wrong with asking someone if they've had
Speaker 1: an SDD check. I actually kind of encourage it.
Speaker 2: Oh, I think you definitely should. I have a girlfriend,
Speaker 2: a really good girlfriend who's a babe and like everyone
Speaker 2: wants to sleep with her, but she has never and
Speaker 2: will never and she only just told me this last week.
Speaker 2: She has never and will never sleep with anyone without
Speaker 2: them proving they've got they've had an s C check.
Speaker 2: She gets, they email her the results, she has to
Speaker 2: have it in a hard copy. She actually does it.
Speaker 2: She yeah, she actually does it. She's not shy about
Speaker 2: it either, and she's I mean, if the off chances
Speaker 2: she's had a one night stand in her life, which
Speaker 2: she says she doesn't really like to do anyway.
Speaker 1: She's like, I do imagine about you're about to have
Speaker 1: one night stand. You're like, I'm really sorry, we can't
Speaker 1: do this until you go to the doctors. And then
Speaker 1: that's like the most prolonged white one night stand ever.
Speaker 1: He then goes to the doctors. Three days later he
Speaker 1: emails you. Then you're like, cool, let's resume where were you,
Speaker 1: Oh doggie star, Let's go.
Speaker 2: Well, this only works for her because A she doesn't
Speaker 2: do one night stands because for sex, for her, she
Speaker 2: wants to have some sort of connection to them. And
Speaker 2: that's so fine, Like I totally get that. B guys
Speaker 2: want to sleep with her enough that they're gonna go
Speaker 2: and do it. They're gonna go and get the test
Speaker 2: and show, and then she's like free for all because
Speaker 2: she doesn't want personally, this girl doesn't want to use
Speaker 2: condoms when she has sex, so she wants to know
Speaker 2: that she's got a connection with them and that they're
Speaker 2: clean and healthy. And I think, you know what, if
Speaker 2: that works for you, go for it. That is not
Speaker 2: gonna work for everyone. Unfortunately, I think she's a bit
Speaker 2: of a league of her own there. I think, like
Speaker 2: Laura said, if you're gonna have a one night stand,
Speaker 2: use protection. Obviously, of course you can ask them. I
Speaker 2: ask for sure, but I think I ask for my
Speaker 2: own peace of mind because they're not going to say, oh, yes,
Speaker 2: I have her bees Like they're not gonna say it.
Speaker 2: Are they. A guy that's about to sleep with someone,
Speaker 2: I don't think he's gonna be honest. So that's something
Speaker 2: you need to keep in the back of your mind.
Speaker 1: Well, I think there are some guys that are really honest,
Speaker 1: like I genuinely do think. I mean, I know that
Speaker 1: I've been in a situation before where I was very
Speaker 1: close to having sex with someone and they were very
Speaker 1: honest about what STIs they had, and that kind of
Speaker 1: you know, slowed things down tremendously. You know, we actually
Speaker 1: ended up dating for a really long time. It's not
Speaker 1: that I think there's a lot of stigma around STIs
Speaker 1: that there doesn't need to be. And we've talked about
Speaker 1: this before, especially when we did the Sex Education podcast
Speaker 1: with Juliet Allen. There's so much stigma around sti's and
Speaker 1: we treat them as though like they're this really frightening
Speaker 1: thing to catch and I don't think that they majority
Speaker 1: of them are as frightening as what we meet them
Speaker 1: out to be. However, do you want to catch something?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 1: Should you protect yourself? Absolutely? And so for you at
Speaker 1: the time, it felt normal and comfortable in your relationship
Speaker 1: to ask and make sure that they've had an STI check.
Speaker 1: I think that that's totally normal, and I think that
Speaker 1: there are a whole lot of women out there who
Speaker 1: would be asking before having sex. Hey, when was the
Speaker 1: last time you got checked? I asked, Matt. Good thing
Speaker 1: is when you do The Bachelor, you kind of have to.
Speaker 1: That's actually one one of the things that you have
Speaker 1: to prove that you've had done before you can go
Speaker 1: on the show. You have to go and get an
Speaker 1: STI check.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a prerequisite you have. You do have to
Speaker 2: prove everyone sexually healthy.
Speaker 1: Yeah, there's a full they give you, like a full
Speaker 1: health and body checkover. I don't know what a body
Speaker 1: checkover sort.
Speaker 2: Of check over to may give you. I don't get a.
Speaker 1: Like, ma'am, take off all of your clothes. No, so
Speaker 1: you have to do a full health check. I mean,
Speaker 1: I don't know what the rules are these days, but
Speaker 1: one of the health checks. Was that you have to
Speaker 1: get tested for a whole lot of different STIs.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you get you get your boods done and they
Speaker 2: do the works.
Speaker 1: Yeah. So look, I think it's a totally normal thing
Speaker 1: to ask. I don't think that your friends should be
Speaker 1: making you feel weird for it. Maybe they should be
Speaker 1: asking more often. But also I recommend that everyone goes
Speaker 1: after each sexual partner. You go and you get yourself
Speaker 1: checked because you just don't know otherwise. And we have
Speaker 1: a real responsibility to be responsible when it comes to
Speaker 1: our own health and also our sexual partners.
Speaker 2: Responsibility to be responsible. That is true.
Speaker 1: Like what you did there, Okay, question number two, I
Speaker 1: feel like we got that. Yeah.
Speaker 2: I just want to reiterate that what Laura said is
Speaker 2: absolutely true. It's not the end of the world if
Speaker 2: you get an STI or if someone has an STI.
Speaker 2: They're not all really, really nasty. There are some nasty ones.
Speaker 2: A lot of them can be treated. But having said that,
Speaker 2: it is important that you go and get checked after
Speaker 2: you have had any new sexual encounters because whilst some
Speaker 2: of them can be quite harmless, if left untreated for
Speaker 2: a prolonged period of time, that's when they can get dangerous,
Speaker 2: so like, sure you've done it, you're like, whoops, shouldn't
Speaker 2: have done that? Just go and get checked anyway, it's
Speaker 2: not gonna hurt. Just so this person that wrote in
Speaker 2: knows there's nothing to be embarrassed about. Don't let your
Speaker 2: friends make you feel embarrassed because you ask people about
Speaker 2: their sexual health. If anything, your friends need.
Speaker 1: To be doing it alrighty question number two.
Speaker 2: Question two. I have been with my boyfriend for nearly
Speaker 2: three years. He's the most amazing guy. He treats me
Speaker 2: exactly how I want to be treated, and he's my
Speaker 2: absolute best friend. But the last few months, to be honest,
Speaker 2: nearly coming up to probably a year, our sex life
Speaker 2: has been really, really grim. I am never in the mood,
Speaker 2: and on the off chance that I am, he's not.
Speaker 2: Am I just being lazy. I feel like we've been
Speaker 2: together for such a long time. I guess it's now
Speaker 2: normal to go without sex for two weeks, But I
Speaker 2: can't help but wonder if it's normal for someone to
Speaker 2: have a high sex drive in a past relationship and
Speaker 2: in our first year to then go to happily going
Speaker 2: without sex for weeks at a time. He's the most
Speaker 2: amazing guy. I would be crazier to let him go,
Speaker 2: but something just doesn't seem right. Is it me? Is
Speaker 2: it him? Do I have a low sex drive? And
Speaker 2: is it break up worthy?
Speaker 1: Help? Dun dunt h. I actually love this question because
Speaker 1: I think that so many people, especially in long term relationships,
Speaker 1: go through these like ebbs and flows in how often
Speaker 1: they're having sex, and then when you're not having sex
Speaker 1: quote unquote like enough or compared to what you think
Speaker 1: other people having sex, you then feel like, oh, there's
Speaker 1: something wrong with me. Even if you are completely satisfied,
Speaker 1: even if you and your partner are completely satisfied, there
Speaker 1: is still this comparison that exists. And I know loads
Speaker 1: of women who are in very long term relationships who
Speaker 1: are not getting down and dirty three times a week
Speaker 1: like they used to. They're having sex once a fortnite
Speaker 1: and they are completely satisfied. They're completely happy with that.
Speaker 1: Their partners are also completely satisfied, and therefore it is
Speaker 1: not a problem. It's only a problem if it's a
Speaker 1: problem for you. So if you feel like you're not
Speaker 1: having sex enough, if you are wanting it and your
Speaker 1: needs are not being met, then it becomes a problem,
Speaker 1: but I think you know, everybody is different and there
Speaker 1: are times in life where you go through these ebbs
Speaker 1: and flows of libido where your libido will be higher
Speaker 1: or lower. Brittany's looking at me like, no, this is
Speaker 1: a fucking problem, and I'm like, happy, you haven't been
Speaker 1: in a longer term term relationship for a really long
Speaker 1: time and I don't need reminding of that. And I
Speaker 1: was like, and don't tell me once a fortnite is
Speaker 1: not enough, because right now that's all I can do.
Speaker 2: Laura. Laura goes to me like, we just sat down
Speaker 2: to do the questions, and Laura said, what do you
Speaker 2: think about the that you know once sex every two
Speaker 2: weeks in a long term relationship? And I was like,
Speaker 2: I just want you to think about what you just
Speaker 2: asked me. I was like, I mean, like, I haven't
Speaker 2: been in the experience for a long time. I haven't
Speaker 2: been in the position for a long time, but I
Speaker 2: do still have some thoughts on it. Look, you are asking.
Speaker 2: The fact that you're saying is this breakup worthy means
Speaker 2: in your mind it is a problem. You aren't happy
Speaker 2: with it. Whilst you said you've got a low sex drive,
Speaker 2: you're still highlighting the fact that it's an issue for you.
Speaker 2: It's playing on your mind and you're like, well, is
Speaker 2: this the end? Do I need to leave and find
Speaker 2: someone new? No, I don't think you do yet. Things
Speaker 2: like this do happen in relationships, especially long term relationships.
Speaker 2: You just get super comfortable with each other. And guys,
Speaker 2: I have been in relationships for a total of ten years,
Speaker 2: just not for ten years, so I know. But it's
Speaker 2: sexy's going to die down. And there's a multitude of
Speaker 2: reasons for that. Stress, fatigue, long distance contraceptions, sometimes different
Speaker 2: medications you take. There is there are so many reasons
Speaker 2: that you could be having all these sex drive. If
Speaker 2: it's a continual problem, you can go to your doctor,
Speaker 2: you can go to a GP and you can literally say, hey,
Speaker 2: you got all those sex drive. There's things that they
Speaker 2: can help you with. There's things they can suggest you
Speaker 2: can work on as a couple. That's definitely a route
Speaker 2: you can take, So don't be shy on doing that.
Speaker 2: So many people do that. It's just that not a
Speaker 2: lot of people speak about the fact that they do it.
Speaker 2: But that's why we're here.
Speaker 1: And I also think, like I genuinely believe the more
Speaker 1: that you have it, the more that you want it.
Speaker 1: If I go X amount of time without sex, it's
Speaker 1: the last thing I'm thinking about. But if you get
Speaker 1: into a routine where you're having sex more often and
Speaker 1: then you're turned on more often, and then of course
Speaker 1: you're gonna want it more. So I do definitely think
Speaker 1: that the more that you do it, the more that
Speaker 1: you want it. So, no, it's not lazy, but maybe
Speaker 1: sometimes you need to try and do something a little
Speaker 1: bit different in order to kickstart that fire again, because
Speaker 1: it's not just gonna come and bite you in the
Speaker 1: ass out of know. Well, maybe he will come and
Speaker 1: bite you in the ass.
Speaker 2: Maybe that's what you need.
Speaker 1: I don't think it's just gonna like reignite. I don't
Speaker 1: think your sex drive is just gonna reappear. You do
Speaker 1: have to try something different in all to try and
Speaker 1: kind of like kickstart that libido. However, I did some
Speaker 1: research into this. I love that, guys, And by research,
Speaker 1: I mean I googled, so MoMA me A actually put
Speaker 1: out a study. They just survey of a thousand women,
Speaker 1: which doesn't sound like that many women, But I don't
Speaker 1: know a thousand women myself. To ask, so I'm like, Okay, yeah,
Speaker 1: this is a reasonable survey.
Speaker 2: Do we have any research from reliable journical perioviod articles
Speaker 2: or just go with Mama mea, just kind of go
Speaker 2: with this is why I do the research.
Speaker 1: No, but this is like, this is still a thousand
Speaker 1: women will ask how often are you having sex? And
Speaker 1: everybody said unanimously that they think you should be having
Speaker 1: sex three times a week, And I'm like, three times
Speaker 1: a week sounds exhausting. Guys like, I mean, I'm pregnant
Speaker 1: and really tired, but that's all like a lot for
Speaker 1: me right now. So I've I felt like far more
Speaker 1: reassured by these answers and Okay. The most common answer
Speaker 1: was once a week, with two hundred and seventy nine
Speaker 1: women saying once a week, followed by twice a week
Speaker 1: with one hundred and ninety four women saying they have
Speaker 1: sex twice a week. Once a fortnight was the third
Speaker 1: most popular answer with a undred and sixty year women,
Speaker 1: and once a month with one hundred and fifty seven women.
Speaker 1: Literally it came in fifth place those are having sex
Speaker 1: three times a week, and they were mostly people who
Speaker 1: early on in their relationships and people who had been
Speaker 1: in long term relationships were having sex once a week.
Speaker 2: So this is them saying what they're actually doing at
Speaker 2: this current time, or what they think should be happening
Speaker 2: at that point.
Speaker 1: This is what they're actually doing. What they think they
Speaker 1: should be doing is having sex three times a week,
Speaker 1: but what they're actually doing is having sex once a
Speaker 1: week to one's fortnite. Right. I'm not saying that it's great.
Speaker 1: I'm not saying that that's enough. I'm saying that everyone
Speaker 1: has different wants and needs. But if you are satisfied
Speaker 1: personally with having sex once a fortnite and it doesn't
Speaker 1: actually upset you, it's just that you think you're supposed
Speaker 1: to be having sex more and the thought of that
Speaker 1: is where that inconsistency lies, then don't stress so much.
Speaker 1: It's only a number. You can work on it. It's
Speaker 1: not something that you need to break up with your
Speaker 1: boyfriend over.
Speaker 2: Agree. Also, you need to talk to your boyfriend about it.
Speaker 2: You didn't mention if you have done that yet. If
Speaker 2: you haven't open communication all, tell him, well, ask him
Speaker 2: what do you think about how often we're having sex?
Speaker 2: What do you think about our sex life? Does it worry?
Speaker 2: Do you want it more? Is it me that's not
Speaker 2: wanting it? What do you think we can do to
Speaker 2: change it? Have the conversation. Because you're in a long
Speaker 2: term relationship, you obviously love and trust each other. These
Speaker 2: are the conversations you should be having. Laura is about
Speaker 2: to burst into laughter. What are you laughing?
Speaker 1: I'm laughing because like the other day, I was with
Speaker 1: Matt and I were going for a walk and we
Speaker 1: were like, I was like, gosh, it's so amazing. Like
Speaker 1: we've been together for you know, only for like three
Speaker 1: and a half years, and like we're going to have
Speaker 1: two children, and like, you know, we live in a
Speaker 1: nice place together, and like we've just accomplished so much.
Speaker 1: And he goes, yeah, we've had sex like six times.
Speaker 2: That's touche, but also like true, it's actually true.
Speaker 1: No, okay, Like, look, I know I make jokes about
Speaker 1: this guys when I'm not pregnant and feeling like the
Speaker 1: size of a house. Some it's so funny because during
Speaker 1: my first pregnancy, I was like, I am a beautiful goddess,
Speaker 1: Like I've felt so sexy, and we were like and
Speaker 1: that had a full on pregnancy fetish. We were going
Speaker 1: at it like more during my last pregnancy than what
Speaker 1: we did when we first met. And this time I
Speaker 1: feel disgusting, Like this pregnancy is so different to the
Speaker 1: last one. I feel hideous. Yeah, my sex drive does
Speaker 1: not exist this time, and it's completely different.
Speaker 2: And Laura knows. I always tell the truth. I look
Speaker 2: at Laura and I'm like, you are so beautiful. You
Speaker 2: look so good pregnant, Like I wish you could see
Speaker 2: how other people see you. I know that you feel
Speaker 2: gross because you feel sick and you feel like you're
Speaker 2: gonna vomit, and you just feel like you're the size
Speaker 2: of the house. But that is not what other people see.
Speaker 2: I promise you.
Speaker 1: Has anyone seen the meme or like, go and google
Speaker 1: this when you finished listening to this episode. Okay, there's
Speaker 1: this like video that's on YouTube and it's these two
Speaker 1: little Scottish girls and they're trying to like video record
Speaker 1: a makeup tutorial and their mom comes in and she's like, disgusting,
Speaker 1: which one of your fucking was? It is disgusted that
Speaker 1: I hadn't flushed the toilet. That is how I feel.
Speaker 1: That is why I call myself and I know that's
Speaker 1: really bad, But every time, every time, Matt's trying to me,
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm disgusted. Now. Every time you hear the
Speaker 1: word disgusting, that is what you guys will think of it.
Speaker 1: I was like, so rad, that was a long way
Speaker 1: to get there.
Speaker 2: But when you were like that's how I feel, I
Speaker 2: was like, hang on, you feel disgusting or you feel
Speaker 2: like a tird legend a toilet. I was like, which
Speaker 2: one is it. I don't know if we answered that
Speaker 2: for you, No, I think we did, alright.
Speaker 1: Question three, Hey, guys, have a question.
Speaker 2: You touched on it a bit through the Single Pringle episode,
Speaker 2: which was amazing, and it's genuinely about where and how
Speaker 2: to meet single guys these days. I'm twenty eight, I've
Speaker 2: been single for just over a year now. I appreciate
Speaker 2: that COVID threw everyone off, but I know, aside from COVID,
Speaker 2: it's so rare for me to meet men these days.
Speaker 2: I'm not one for super late night clubbing and big
Speaker 2: nights out. I've done that, been there, and now I'm
Speaker 2: just over it. I've always felt I've never met great
Speaker 2: guys that way anyhow. Now most of my friends are
Speaker 2: moving into relationships down and a lot of them have
Speaker 2: actually met people through dating apps. The apps just haven't
Speaker 2: worked for me. I have lots of girlfriends that are tinderellers,
Speaker 2: but it's just not for me. I don't work with
Speaker 2: any men my age, and even places like the gym
Speaker 2: or restaurants is becoming so rare that genuine guys will
Speaker 2: just come and talk to me. Honestly, where the fuck
Speaker 2: are they?
Speaker 1: Brandy? This is your domain.
Speaker 2: The reason I wanted to answer this is because I
Speaker 2: genuinely don't know. I want to be really honest with this.
Speaker 2: I haven't met I've met one guy actually in the
Speaker 2: wild in the last probably six months. You know the
Speaker 2: dog guy that I dated.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, the dog guy literally met a guy on
Speaker 1: met she met Bondai dog guy.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Oh, people gotta know who that is. Yeah, this
Speaker 2: guy that was walking up the promenade and he had
Speaker 2: this really cute dog and he was super hot too,
Speaker 2: and I was just like, you know what, yolo, and
Speaker 2: I just started talking to him. The dog was a
Speaker 2: good way, and I started to pat the dog and
Speaker 2: play with a dog.
Speaker 1: I'm going to jump in on this story and highjacket
Speaker 1: for a second. Brand So Britta had met this guy
Speaker 1: dog like dog guy dog Bondai guy patted his dog
Speaker 1: she'd left. She'd then found him on Instagram, But like
Speaker 1: serendipitously found him on Instagram, she didn't go crazy stalk mode. No,
Speaker 1: you count him?
Speaker 2: Can I know? I'm jumping in ut Guys, this was crazy.
Speaker 2: I met this guy and I started talking to him,
Speaker 2: and then when he walked off, I was with my
Speaker 2: sister and a friend and we were like, that guy
Speaker 2: was so hot. Why didn't any of us ask for
Speaker 2: his name or anything about him? Anyway? I had put
Speaker 2: out to the universe. I was like, I need to
Speaker 2: know who that guy is. That's what I said when
Speaker 2: I got home from my walk and opened up my phone.
Speaker 2: I'm not kidding. I follow this account, and if you
Speaker 2: don't follow the account on Instagram, you need to follow it.
Speaker 2: Hot dudes with dogs. It's literally photos from all around
Speaker 2: the world of hot guys and their dogs. And I
Speaker 2: am not kidding. This is literally half an hour after
Speaker 2: I met this guy and said to the universe, I
Speaker 2: need to know who that guy is, he popped up
Speaker 2: on my screen with his dog and I was like,
Speaker 2: you're kidding me.
Speaker 1: So this is where I come into the story. So
Speaker 1: it comes over to my house after she had just
Speaker 1: mortifyingly embarrassed me in front of my ex boyfriend, which.
Speaker 2: Hang on, I didn't know I was embarrassing you.
Speaker 1: I've told you guys that story before, if you if
Speaker 1: you can remember it for anyone who's an OG listener,
Speaker 1: it's the whole park Hall story where Britt was like
Speaker 1: running around purposely in front of my ex boyfriend down
Speaker 1: in Bono Beach. Anyway, long story short, she had done that,
Speaker 1: and then she's telling me this story about this dog
Speaker 1: guy that she now knows who he is. She's found
Speaker 1: his Instagram and everything, but like obviously she's like how
Speaker 1: do I how do I message him? Or like he
Speaker 1: probably won't even know who I am or the fact
Speaker 1: that we met. So I was like, hey, just show
Speaker 1: me your phone for a second, and then I liked
Speaker 1: about fifteen photos of him without a shirt.
Speaker 2: Yeah from nineteen eighty seven, Yeah, from nineteen eighty seven.
Speaker 2: She scrolled back, she scrolled deep, and I was I
Speaker 2: was mortified. And then you can't like he would have
Speaker 2: got the notifications they did because then he slid into
Speaker 2: her DMS like five minutes later.
Speaker 1: So really I was the one who set them up.
Speaker 1: So as much as I'm that friend you don't want
Speaker 1: to have, secretly you're happy that I'm there.
Speaker 2: And then do you remember the funny thing that happened
Speaker 2: after that? We'll just keep going with this story. We
Speaker 2: have not answered this question. This funny, this was I reckon.
Speaker 2: This was one of the funniest moment that Laura, Matt
Speaker 2: and I have ever had. We were in hysterics. The
Speaker 2: three of us are sitting on the lounge. They've just
Speaker 2: hijacked my phone. I think Matt had even commented on
Speaker 2: one of his photos from like five years ago. I
Speaker 2: was like, you're a bastard anyway, give me my phone back,
Speaker 2: and then we're so I snatched my phone back and
Speaker 2: I'm like, I was mortified. I was like, you got
Speaker 2: your assholes, You've gone, you know, you've ruined everything that
Speaker 2: we've met, this really hot guy, like you're so fucking hot,
Speaker 2: look at him, and now you've gone liked photos from
Speaker 2: five years ago. How am I ever going to recover
Speaker 2: from this? And then I looked down at my phone
Speaker 2: and I had no Then the girls were like no
Speaker 2: that I had said.
Speaker 1: I was like, babe, just send them a photo of
Speaker 1: your badge. It'll be fine. This whole conversation played out
Speaker 1: whilst Brittany didn't realize.
Speaker 2: But she was voice recording it the whole almost it
Speaker 2: was ready to pressent and my thing, you know, when
Speaker 2: you can't take your finger off the button. I was like,
Speaker 2: oh my god, how do I How do I swipe
Speaker 2: this down to delete? If I let it? I had
Speaker 2: this panic mode. I had to keep my thumb on
Speaker 2: the phone for like an hour because I was like,
Speaker 2: I don't know how to delete this voice.
Speaker 1: Just put your phone on aeroplane motor, then throw it
Speaker 1: in the ocean. Panic anyway, Hey, so that didn't answer
Speaker 1: your question. The question is is that Brittany has no
Speaker 1: fucking idea where to beat men.
Speaker 2: No, But the point of this was was, Look, you
Speaker 2: can meet people in the wild if you are open
Speaker 2: to it and putting yourself out there. Unfortunately, they're not
Speaker 2: going to walk into your lund room. I know you
Speaker 2: said you're going to the gym and no one's talking
Speaker 2: to you. But you have to just keep doing things.
Speaker 2: You have to just keep meeting new people you're meeting
Speaker 2: because you might make a new friend and they might
Speaker 2: have a friend. It's just networking. Getting out there going
Speaker 2: for drinks with different kinds of people in different crowds,
Speaker 2: in different locations. If you keep going to the same
Speaker 2: location with the same two people once a fortnight, probably
Speaker 2: not gonna happen for you.
Speaker 1: I also think something that's really important is, like you
Speaker 1: have to be proactive, you have to flirt, you have
Speaker 1: to go up and speak to people in the wild.
Speaker 1: And I know that that can be really intimidating. I
Speaker 1: know that it's kind of a change in how things
Speaker 1: are normally done. But there is a lot of success
Speaker 1: that comes from being the person to make the first move,
Speaker 1: because guys are just as timid. Guys are just as
Speaker 1: scared of rejection as what girls are. And I think
Speaker 1: because of online platforms, it's made people even more fearful
Speaker 1: of doing things in the real world. So when you say,
Speaker 1: like you go to the gym and no guy comes
Speaker 1: up to you, Like, I could not tell you one
Speaker 1: time a guy has ever come up to me at
Speaker 1: the gym ever, Like have I approached guys at the gym? Yes, yes,
Speaker 1: I have. It worked out. Okay, she's a very short
Speaker 1: period of time.
Speaker 2: She's like, do you need a spot?
Speaker 1: Literally, I was like, hey, can you show me how
Speaker 1: to do that arm exercise with your big, massive biceps.
Speaker 1: I do think it's important as women that we mastered
Speaker 1: the art of flirting and that we do feel confident
Speaker 1: enough to be able to go out and get what
Speaker 1: we want. And we say this all the time, but
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say it again. This it's so important because
Speaker 1: if you're not the one who's cho a guy and
Speaker 1: choosing the type of person that you want to date,
Speaker 1: then you're only being left with what's being offered to you,
Speaker 1: and more often than not, that's not going to be
Speaker 1: something that you're interested in. So like, have that confidence
Speaker 1: to go and make the first move. And I know,
Speaker 1: brit you're a massive advocate for it, like you have
Speaker 1: no shame in going up to guys and talking about
Speaker 1: but it works.
Speaker 2: But the thing is, the life really changed from me
Speaker 2: in so many ways when I stopped caring a what
Speaker 2: people think and what people thought if I went and
Speaker 2: approach them, and b if you don't actually care about
Speaker 2: the outcome. So if you don't look put this pressure
Speaker 2: on yourself and don't overthink it. Don't look at them
Speaker 2: from across the room and be like, what if he
Speaker 2: says no? What if he throws a drink in my face?
Speaker 2: What if you can't even think that because if he
Speaker 2: says no, there's so many other people in the world.
Speaker 2: And so it's like, for example, this guy that I
Speaker 2: saw on the promenade, and in my mind, I was like,
Speaker 2: that guy's so much hotter than me. But then I
Speaker 2: was like, I don't care because I've got nothing to lose.
Speaker 2: I ended up dating this guy for a couple of weeks.
Speaker 2: Like we forgot to tell that part of the story.
Speaker 2: We ended up like becoming friends. I read into him
Speaker 2: the other day. Long I didn't tell you for that
Speaker 2: as well.
Speaker 1: I feel like I had a real like I played
Speaker 1: a real role in that relationship in that three week relationship.
Speaker 2: Look, it was probably closer to force the longest one
Speaker 2: I've had. But you just have to have this confidence
Speaker 2: and self assurance in yourself to know that it's not
Speaker 2: the end of the world if it doesn't go well
Speaker 2: and you don't go and get married. But also I
Speaker 2: can guarantee you if you go up and speak to
Speaker 2: a guy, give him a compliment, hit on him, show interest,
Speaker 2: he's gonna be impressed. He's going like it doesn't happen often.
Speaker 2: So if you do, go and approach him and give
Speaker 2: him a compliment. He's gonna be tofed. Regardless of how
Speaker 2: it ends. You're gonna make his day. You'll feel better
Speaker 2: in yourself. And the more you do it, the more
Speaker 2: comfortable you will be doing it. And I personally, all
Speaker 2: my male friends, all the people I've ever dated, everyone
Speaker 2: has always said I would never have approached you. I
Speaker 2: would have never started that conversation. We're in the here
Speaker 2: because you came and started the conversation. Because guys, unfortunately
Speaker 2: in this day and age, aren't as proactive anymore, for
Speaker 2: a multitude of reasons. They're being babied by their mummies.
Speaker 2: We've got online dating, they don't have to work that hard.
Speaker 2: They lack confidence, especially when you're in a group of women.
Speaker 2: And this is another tip. If you're in a big
Speaker 2: group of women out with all your friends, the guy's
Speaker 2: not going to come and approach you. He's definitely not
Speaker 2: going to approach you. He may come and approach you
Speaker 2: when there's two of you. And I know this because
Speaker 2: I have asked so many men and they just they
Speaker 2: it's too intimidating. It's too intimidating for a guy to
Speaker 2: come up to a girl when there's ten other girls
Speaker 2: there in case he gets rejected, he one hundred percent
Speaker 2: has a greater fear of rejection than you do.
Speaker 1: I totally totally agree. I do think you know, if
Speaker 1: you're really really wanting to meet new people. Of course,
Speaker 1: like we say all the time, you could always do
Speaker 1: and you do new things, like you know, start a
Speaker 1: new sport, join up to new clubs, like you do.
Speaker 1: Have to change something about your normal day to day
Speaker 1: to be able to open your network up to new people.
Speaker 1: And also, like your relationships or when you meet new people,
Speaker 1: it doesn't come from your friends, right, Like it's not
Speaker 1: going to come from like your best friend or the
Speaker 1: people that you move in a circle with every day,
Speaker 1: because those people you've already met their friends, you already
Speaker 1: know their network. It comes from like your loose ties,
Speaker 1: so it comes from your friend's friend, or it comes
Speaker 1: from the work colleague, or it comes from those people
Speaker 1: that are in your circle who you know and you're
Speaker 1: friends with, but who you don't know their extended circle.
Speaker 1: So you do have to start doing things with people.
Speaker 1: And I know that that can sometimes be a bit
Speaker 1: of a pain in the ass because we all have
Speaker 1: very limited time, but start expanding your friendship circle a
Speaker 1: little bit and start looking for those loose ties and
Speaker 1: those loose connections, because that's where you're going to meet
Speaker 1: new people.
Speaker 2: Also, I know dating apps can be exhausting. I know
Speaker 2: they can be hard work, and you can go through
Speaker 2: your lows with them and you just hate them, we
Speaker 2: delete them. But I think it's really important not to
Speaker 2: give up on them because the fact of the matter
Speaker 2: is now, I would love to actually know the odds,
Speaker 2: but I don't know any single person that's not online dating.
Speaker 2: Like it's just mainstream. It is the normal way to
Speaker 2: meet people now, whether we like that or not.
Speaker 1: Do I like it?
Speaker 2: No? I detest it. Am I on them? Yes, because
Speaker 2: that is where everyone I've seen I told you guys chatting,
Speaker 2: Tatum's on there. Every famous person in the world that
Speaker 2: single is on a dating app. And I know that
Speaker 2: they're different at dating apps to BONDI hinge. But the
Speaker 2: fact is, the stigma's gone with dating apps. It's what
Speaker 2: everyone does and it's how people meet. I know heaps
Speaker 2: of people that have gotten married from dating apps and
Speaker 2: had very successful stories. So don't give up.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And I also think with dating apps The problem
Speaker 1: is is like it is so two dimensional, like you
Speaker 1: don't get you don't get a look into someone's personality, right,
Speaker 1: and so you're basically you're only one hundred percent judging
Speaker 1: it off their physical appearance in a photo. Which and
Speaker 1: I know that when you meet someone at a bar,
Speaker 1: obviously it's based on their physical appearance as well. But
Speaker 1: I think when you meet someone in real life or
Speaker 1: you see someone in real life, there's a charisma and
Speaker 1: there's an aura that goes with that person as well,
Speaker 1: which you don't see in a photo. Can't feel that
Speaker 1: in a photo, So I think that the photos are
Speaker 1: even more two dimensional. But I do think and I
Speaker 1: agree with you, that pretty much every single person is
Speaker 1: online dating. You know, they might not be active every
Speaker 1: single day, but most people have a profile. So we
Speaker 1: can't just blanket wash it and be like online dating sucks,
Speaker 1: I'm never going to meet anyone, it's been shit. I
Speaker 1: think you also have to open up your network and
Speaker 1: date people who aren't necessarily on paper, your exact type.
Speaker 1: That can be a really annoying thing for people to say,
Speaker 1: because you're like, well, I'm not going to date someone
Speaker 1: who I'm not attracted to but you're not going to
Speaker 1: know if you're attracted to them or not unless you
Speaker 1: give someone a chance.
Speaker 2: I was speaking to my friend yesterday. You know, Jackson Garlic.
Speaker 2: He was on Bachelor in Paradise with me, and he
Speaker 2: was on a.
Speaker 1: Name dropping right now.
Speaker 2: We're still really good friends. We chat and we were
Speaker 2: chatting and we were just telling each other about some
Speaker 2: funny because he's online as well, dating everyone is. We're
Speaker 2: talking to each other about some funny stories and he
Speaker 2: just said something that really stuck with me, and I
Speaker 2: think it was good advice, but he just said in
Speaker 2: like a throwaway comment. He's like, man, you just can't
Speaker 2: get online and swipe if you're in a bad mood.
Speaker 2: And I'm like, what do you mean. He's like, just
Speaker 2: don't fucking do it. He's like, if you're in a
Speaker 2: bad mood, don't go onto your dating app. Because if
Speaker 2: you're in a bad mood, don't go onto your dating
Speaker 2: app because it's never going to end well. You are
Speaker 2: not going to give any banter you. Every little thing
Speaker 2: that someone does that might piss you off will piss
Speaker 2: you off. You'll be mad, they'll say the wrong thing.
Speaker 2: He's like, that is he's like that's his greatest bit
Speaker 2: of advice. If you're having a shit day, don't do it.
Speaker 1: But also, I guess not even if they're doing something
Speaker 1: that pisss you off, or like if you just genuinely
Speaker 1: don't match with anyone or you don't see anyone on there,
Speaker 1: it's even more deflating, Like you feel even more like,
Speaker 1: oh yeah, here's the reinforcement that there's nothing online and
Speaker 1: that I'm never going to meet anyone. Like I mean,
Speaker 1: I think it's important to have online dating as a
Speaker 1: backup and that you know, obviously there's so many success
Speaker 1: stories that come out of it, but being proactive in
Speaker 1: real life, you know, actually going approaching people, flirting, doing
Speaker 1: all the things that takes a lot of confidence to do.
Speaker 1: I think that they're all really important steps as well
Speaker 1: in meeting someone. If that's what you really want, just.
Speaker 2: Don't give up. Well mad sick guys, you know that
Speaker 2: this is always short and sharp. We I had a
Speaker 2: lot of fun doing that. I think we definitely went rogue.
Speaker 2: We threw in some stories we didn't know we were
Speaker 2: going to tell, but hey, that's what life Uncut's about. Guys.
Speaker 1: Thank you to every single person who's sent in a
Speaker 1: question for Ask Uncut. We get so many questions sent
Speaker 1: to us, and I just want to I just want
Speaker 1: to apologize, because it's not physically possible for us to
Speaker 1: get back to every single person. We really we do
Speaker 1: read as many of the messages as we physically can
Speaker 1: that come through our inbox, and we really do try
Speaker 1: and pick out the questions that we think are going
Speaker 1: to be most relatable to as many people as possible.
Speaker 1: But just know that if you do have a question,
Speaker 1: or you have something that you want to put out
Speaker 1: and you really want answers to, we always have the
Speaker 1: Facebook group there as well where you can put your
Speaker 1: Ask Uncut questions up, or if you want it to
Speaker 1: be done anonymously, you can send them to us and
Speaker 1: we will post them onto the Facebook group it's Life
Speaker 1: Uncut podcast, and then you'll not only have us answer
Speaker 1: your questions, but you'll also have the wealth of an
Speaker 1: amazing community jumping on board, being supportive and answering and
Speaker 1: giving their advice as well. So that's always another option.
Speaker 1: So yeah, keep the questions coming. We will be back
Speaker 1: next week next Tuesday for another episode of Life on
Speaker 1: Card because you literally cannot escape us now especially if
Speaker 1: you've subscribed. We're just going to keep on falling into
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