Speaker 1: I'd like to acknowledge the traditional owners on which this
Speaker 1: episode is being recorded, the combo marry people. We pay
Speaker 1: our respects to elders past, present and emerging and extend
Speaker 1: that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples.
Speaker 1: Today I'm your host, Georgie Stevenson, and this is the
Speaker 1: Rise and Conquer Podcast. This is the podcast where which
Speaker 1: have mindset, self development and becoming your higher self mix
Speaker 1: soon with a lot of laughs, plus behind the scenes
Speaker 1: of my life running two businesses and being among Think
Speaker 1: of us as the perfect combo of brunch with your
Speaker 1: besties mixed with self development. No matter where you are
Speaker 1: in your journey, We're here to help you be curious,
Speaker 1: pull yourself out, and embrace radical self awareness. If you're
Speaker 1: ready to get into the driver's seat of your own
Speaker 1: life and stop letting life past you by, then you're
Speaker 1: in the right place. Hello everybody, and welcome back to
Speaker 1: the Rise and Conquer Podcast. On today's episode, we are
Speaker 1: talking about the seven rules that have changed my life.
Speaker 1: So I've been doing a lot of self development at
Speaker 1: the moment, and I really I feel like I'm going
Speaker 1: to a new level. Guys, I don't know if you
Speaker 1: feel it too. We do, but I guess it's like,
Speaker 1: you know, I've been on my self development journey for
Speaker 1: like ten years now, and I truly believe like you
Speaker 1: go through certain stages and through certain seasons and phases
Speaker 1: and levels, and I feel like from the start of
Speaker 1: this year, I really have like locked into this new
Speaker 1: awareness with myself and really doing a lot of reflection
Speaker 1: in how I do things and how I show up.
Speaker 1: And also the big catalyst for that was having my
Speaker 1: baby girl, Ivy last year and struggling with being a
Speaker 1: new mum and really struggling with my whole identity around it,
Speaker 1: and I knew I kind of needed to shift and
Speaker 1: go to this next level really to support obviously her,
Speaker 1: but also my evolution in this new season of life,
Speaker 1: because yeah, it was really hard. And it's interesting because
Speaker 1: now having this little human, everything feels so much more
Speaker 1: important to do in regards to doing my own self
Speaker 1: development work, because it's kind of like when you get
Speaker 1: a little child, especially when they're toddlers, you find out
Speaker 1: how much they model you. Yes, And it's interesting because
Speaker 1: we were at the table the other day and Ivy
Speaker 1: was throwing her food and Tim's like, Ivy, don't for
Speaker 1: your food, and we were like, oh, why is she
Speaker 1: doing that? And then it's really funny because we have
Speaker 1: we lived next to a now reserve, we have little birdies.
Speaker 1: And then like literally the next moment, like Tim was
Speaker 1: like throwing food to the birds. And then I looked
Speaker 1: at him and I was like, well, this is why
Speaker 1: she's throwing food And me and him are like, oh, yeah,
Speaker 1: because we feed the birds all the time and we
Speaker 1: throw food to them. And then we're like, don't throw food, Ivy.
Speaker 1: And I'm like, well, she's just seeing what we do.
Speaker 1: And you know, monkey see, monkey do Yeah, And you
Speaker 1: really like when they're told that, You're like, wow, they
Speaker 1: are watching everything. And I remember having this beautiful aha
Speaker 1: moment at the start of the year where I thought,
Speaker 1: you know, if you're so like I led, I read
Speaker 1: this stat that in the first one to seven years
Speaker 1: of a child, they're core beliefs. That's when they're really
Speaker 1: like imprinted and the most strongest, and I thought, wow,
Speaker 1: I've got, you know, the next seven years to really
Speaker 1: help create Ivy. Have them like the best core beliefs. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and she's only gonna know those core beliefs if I
Speaker 1: have them, and I think I have amazing core beliefs,
Speaker 1: but it was really a moment where I was like, yeah,
Speaker 1: but also I can go upper level, yeah, and I
Speaker 1: can make sure I'm being so integral and really model
Speaker 1: these for Ivy. And that's when kind of this journey
Speaker 1: of creating the seven Rules of being your own Best
Speaker 1: Friend started and I started thinking about, Okay, well, how
Speaker 1: do I want Ivy to be? And then I noticed
Speaker 1: how much I wasn't doing simple things like having a
Speaker 1: beautiful internal dialogue instead of like being very passive aggressive
Speaker 1: like we say in the episode. So the seven rules
Speaker 1: that you're about to hear is what I created with
Speaker 1: my co lab with Naked Harvest. So I released my
Speaker 1: limited edition products which is white Swell Caramel is that right?
Speaker 2: White top Caramel Swell and men get passion Fruit pre Workout.
Speaker 1: Guys. I actually don't know what it's called because I
Speaker 1: just call it CARAMELK but like legally we got so
Speaker 1: yeah what a tea said, and then Mengo passion Fruit
Speaker 1: pre work Out, and then beautiful little accessories to go
Speaker 1: with it. And of course, if I'm going to do
Speaker 1: something with you know, anything, it's got to do with
Speaker 1: self development. So this collection launched with the seven Rules
Speaker 1: of Being Your Best Friend, and so you guys would
Speaker 1: have seen them on social media, but I thought it
Speaker 1: would be really cool to actually dive a bit deeper
Speaker 1: and really get into what these seven rules mean to
Speaker 1: me and also how you possibly could apply these to
Speaker 1: your life. I truly believe these rules are life changing,
Speaker 1: oh one hundred and they're so simple. But everyone who
Speaker 1: I've had the discussion about these rules too have those
Speaker 1: aha moments and are like, wow, yeah, if I really reflect,
Speaker 1: I can apply these to my life and really step
Speaker 1: it up or not? Can you restock? No, guys, this
Speaker 1: is the actual conversation I've been having twenty four seven
Speaker 1: of people being like, visually, you're not killing me, I know,
Speaker 1: but also you've got your bags, the teams all stocked up,
Speaker 1: We're ready to go. The NH kitchen stopped up, so funny.
Speaker 1: Ellie literally was like, Hey, can I take three bags
Speaker 1: because I need to ear my roommate once and I
Speaker 1: was like, yes, just for you, Ellie. So everyone is
Speaker 1: stocking up. But as we're recording like this intro, we
Speaker 1: I think let me actually check the units. Oh my god, guys,
Speaker 1: we literally have like less five hundred units. So this
Speaker 1: is like, this is the last call vibes when this
Speaker 1: episode goes out. If you have tried the protein pre
Speaker 1: Worker and you're like, yes, this is my flavor and
Speaker 1: you want to grab it for another month, this is
Speaker 1: the time grab it please, because it's not coming back.
Speaker 1: I've been begging. No it's not. Well, it's it's you know,
Speaker 1: it's one of the real absolutely, but the promises you
Speaker 1: make to yourself, and I feel such a new level
Speaker 1: of integrity with what I say this year. I don't
Speaker 1: know if you guys have noticed that too. So for example,
Speaker 1: I know in business, like a lot of people like
Speaker 1: it's the last time, and then you know, they bring
Speaker 1: it back. And I've definitely been guilty of doing that
Speaker 1: in n H Errancy obviously because it's like everybody wants it.
Speaker 1: You have so much demand and you want to give
Speaker 1: it to the community. But also for me now it's
Speaker 1: more about am I being integral with my words and
Speaker 1: what I say and how I how I be with
Speaker 1: my community too, So for sure, yeah, no she's not
Speaker 1: coming back, but look, we always do new fun stuff.
Speaker 1: But if you true, if you love her, this is
Speaker 1: the last time. But this is such a cool campaign
Speaker 1: to do with our end h products because it's really
Speaker 1: like bringing my two favorite things in the whole entire
Speaker 1: world like together in one campaign. I loved the campaign.
Speaker 1: It was so much fun. So guys, yeah, if you
Speaker 1: don't want to grab the flavors, makes you get on
Speaker 1: to them because they're about to sell out. Put links
Speaker 1: in the show notes. But I really hope you enjoy
Speaker 1: this dive deep into the seven rules of being your
Speaker 1: best Friend.
Speaker 2: But before you get into it, Jogy, what's to a
Speaker 2: weekly recommendation?
Speaker 1: Oh my god, did I just pulle forget the recommendation.
Speaker 1: I'm actually reading a new book, are you, guys. I've
Speaker 1: been smacking out the books since doing like, no social media,
Speaker 1: no Netflix vibes, I have been smacking out the books.
Speaker 1: So new book i'm reading it is called The Breakthrough Experience.
Speaker 1: And what's it about. I'm actually only three chapters deep.
Speaker 1: It's about this guy. He's a chiropractor. I don't know
Speaker 1: what's the thing with chiropractice because Joe Dispenser is a chiropractice.
Speaker 1: The chiropracter they just fix a I love chiropractor. My
Speaker 1: chiropractor used to be really hot. I don't know why
Speaker 1: I had to say that, but anyway, So it's the
Speaker 1: Breakthrough Experience by doctor John F. DeMartini. I think could
Speaker 1: be pronouncing and yeah, I'm many a couple of chapters in,
Speaker 1: but it's like it's weird. It's like manifesting mindset. Heel
Speaker 1: your fucking life vibes. I love it, but it's really good.
Speaker 1: I'm very captivating, and you know, it's a lot about
Speaker 1: gratitude and getting clear on your goals, but he just
Speaker 1: he says it in a really different way that I
Speaker 1: haven't heard before. And it's just I guess when I
Speaker 1: read books now, it's like a lot of the stuff
Speaker 1: I already know because I've read that many books. But
Speaker 1: it's also like it's so good to re read stuff
Speaker 1: and reread ideas and be like, oh cool, he's talking
Speaker 1: about gratitude or manifesting, but he's saying it this way
Speaker 1: and how interesting.
Speaker 2: And sometimes it just doesn't hit till you read it
Speaker 2: a certain way.
Speaker 1: One hundred and ten percent. That's honestly why, Like you know,
Speaker 1: if you even think about the Rhysycle project, like that's
Speaker 1: a manifesting course. Yeah, And it's like there's thousands of
Speaker 1: manifesting course, but there's people who literally have the most
Speaker 1: life changing experience because it's me teaching that course. Yes,
Speaker 1: and I say it in a certain way, and maybe
Speaker 1: they are a similar archetype or you know, whatever it is,
Speaker 1: and it really hits them. It's like, that's what I
Speaker 1: really find is like when you find those people where
Speaker 1: you're like captivated, activated, captivated and activated and you just
Speaker 1: like it feels right and you're like, oh, wow, that's powerful.
Speaker 1: Really hold on to those because they're probably saying the
Speaker 1: stuff you've heard before, but they're saying it in a
Speaker 1: way that is like your brain's eating it up exactly.
Speaker 1: Sometimes it depends on the time too, Yeah, in your life.
Speaker 1: I think also this book it does feel a little
Speaker 1: bit high level in the way of I'm like, oh,
Speaker 1: I feel like I'm grasping and understanding this now, but
Speaker 1: maybe I wouldn't have at the start of my journey. Wow,
Speaker 1: that's interesting. So that's maybe I don't know. If you're
Speaker 1: a full beginner, I don't know if this would be
Speaker 1: the book for you. Might go a little bit over
Speaker 1: your head but not over your head, but just not
Speaker 1: be as impactful.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, what about you. Mine is an app called Open.
Speaker 2: So I've been trying to stay or like not stay
Speaker 2: off socials, but limit my time because I noticed that
Speaker 2: I was just doing a lot of mindless scrolling. And
Speaker 2: it's just one of those ones that like blocks the apps.
Speaker 2: But what I like about it is you can set
Speaker 2: zones of times and apps to block. So, for example,
Speaker 2: work obviously can't block socials because I have to go
Speaker 2: on them.
Speaker 1: I have to be in my life.
Speaker 2: I have to be on my socials or work. But
Speaker 2: so like from five pm, I go into like a
Speaker 2: log off thing and that's when my socials shut off.
Speaker 2: And then I can shut off all my entertainment apps
Speaker 2: at seven pm, which means like no Netflix, Disney Plus
Speaker 2: and all that's blocked from seven pm. So that's what
Speaker 2: I really like about the app, because I find a
Speaker 2: lot of those other blocking ones it just like makes
Speaker 2: you wait three seconds or whatever before you get into
Speaker 2: the app instead, but this one fully blocks it and
Speaker 2: you can't open it.
Speaker 1: So that's my recommendation. Oh my god, Yeah, so interesting.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And I would recommend even if you don't want
Speaker 2: to download an app like that, but try not watching
Speaker 2: TV before bed. If that's a habit you currently have.
Speaker 2: Swap it out for something else.
Speaker 1: Love amazing.
Speaker 3: Let's get into the episode.
Speaker 1: Rule number one, shift your internal dialogue. So this rule
Speaker 1: really was like the catalyst for creating the whole seven rules,
Speaker 1: because the whole seven rules really came from a place
Speaker 1: and explained this at the NH event of I started
Speaker 1: doing a lot of internal work and I realized how
Speaker 1: fucked up my internal system was. Well, just like, mind'
Speaker 1: stop crazy For someone who has done so much self development,
Speaker 1: I was like, fuck, I'm running on mostly shame. You'll
Speaker 1: think I'm running on motivation, and it's shame. No, no, no,
Speaker 1: But I just notice in the way of I thought
Speaker 1: my internal dialogue and my internal story was fine and
Speaker 1: even like great, But then when I really looked at
Speaker 1: how I made decisions or how I spoke to myself internally,
Speaker 1: I was like, oh wait, no, this comes from a
Speaker 1: lot of stories of shame or guilt or being really
Speaker 1: hard on myself. And the whole reason why these seven
Speaker 1: rules were born was because I remember hearing a fact
Speaker 1: that children from the age one to seven is when
Speaker 1: they create their belief system. And I've heard that for years,
Speaker 1: but this really resonates now because of how I teach
Speaker 1: on core beliefs and how much a single belief from
Speaker 1: your childhood can really fuck you up or be the
Speaker 1: catalyst to you doing great things. So true. So it
Speaker 1: really made me think of like, holy shit, Okay, what
Speaker 1: beliefs am I giving Ivy? And I knew I was
Speaker 1: giving her a lot of great beliefs, But also I
Speaker 1: had to be very honest about what was happening internally,
Speaker 1: because what I remember was listening of like children don't
Speaker 1: like listen to what you say, they listen to how
Speaker 1: you model how you be, So it's just how you are, yeah,
Speaker 1: And it's like the beliefs are always going to show themselves.
Speaker 1: When I remember kind of discovering this and really unpacking
Speaker 1: and really thinking and diving deep, I realized my internal
Speaker 1: dialogue was like it was fine, but it did run
Speaker 1: a lot off this shame thing of It's like, it's
Speaker 1: not like my internal dialogue was like you're a shit human. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you're a piece of crap. But it was just like, well, Georgia,
Speaker 1: you should work more because you do have a big
Speaker 1: mortgage and you want it to be the sole provider.
Speaker 1: It's almost like passive. It's so passive as isn't it
Speaker 1: or like you know, yeah, you can eat that bit.
Speaker 1: Is it being healthy? You know? Yeah? And then I
Speaker 1: know exactly what you mean, like it's not bad, but
Speaker 1: if you if I would say it to anyone else,
Speaker 1: I would be embarrassed of how I spoke to them.
Speaker 1: So I was like, what, yeah, black, am I talking
Speaker 1: to myself like that? I feel like it's come a
Speaker 1: long way, but it was like it can do better.
Speaker 1: So rule number one, have an actual good look at
Speaker 1: your internal dialogue. And like the whole tagline is like
Speaker 1: if you wouldn't say it to your bestie, don't say
Speaker 1: it to yourself. And also even if I think of
Speaker 1: you know, like this morning, Brookie from NH was like, Hey,
Speaker 1: I woke up with a headache. I'm really not feeling well.
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna work from home. I might try and
Speaker 1: log in to do some stuff that I'm like, I'm
Speaker 1: not feeling good. And I was like, oh go babe,
Speaker 1: Like I hope you feel better. Don't worry about logging in.
Speaker 1: We've got it sorted. And it's like when we speak
Speaker 1: to others, like because generally if you're listening to this podcast,
Speaker 1: You're a great person. Yeah, And so like I really
Speaker 1: how I interact and talk to other people and just
Speaker 1: be with other people. It is like I'm over generous
Speaker 1: with wanting to be caring and loving for them. But
Speaker 1: it's like we never give that to ourselves. No, because
Speaker 1: if you woke up with a headache, you'd guild yourself
Speaker 1: and to go into work. Yeah, exactly, You'll be like, well,
Speaker 1: this is your fault because all the chocolate you wan't
Speaker 1: not me doing that yesterday. So it's just interesting of
Speaker 1: like clocking that and just being like, oh, okay, my
Speaker 1: internal dialogue is very passive, aggressive, and it's not very nice,
Speaker 1: and so let's just turn it up a notch of
Speaker 1: just being like a tiny bit nicer to ourselves and
Speaker 1: giving ourselves that compassion but also realizing and we'll get
Speaker 1: in this in some other rules of like internal dialogue
Speaker 1: of how you would speak to your bestie, because also
Speaker 1: like how I speak to my best friend. You know,
Speaker 1: she has a small business, she has babies. But also
Speaker 1: if I see an excuse, I'm gonna say like, but
Speaker 1: is that an excuse? Yeah, And I'm going to say
Speaker 1: it in a loving and caring, supportive way. So it
Speaker 1: doesn't just mean being overly nice and just like it's
Speaker 1: letting everything slide, letting everything side, or anything like that.
Speaker 1: It's having a lot of self trust with yourself. But
Speaker 1: I just think this is a huge thing we can
Speaker 1: all think about and change just that tiny bit, because
Speaker 1: I guarantee you we're all fucking bitches to us.
Speaker 2: So internally, something that helped me with this is saying
Speaker 2: it out loud, Like if I'm thinking something, I look
Speaker 2: like a crazy person. I can tell you that, but
Speaker 2: I say it out loud, Like if I'm not gone
Speaker 2: to the gym, I say it out loud to myself
Speaker 2: what I'm thinking about why I'm not going to the gym,
Speaker 2: And I find it so much easier to process and
Speaker 2: distinguish excuses versus actual valid reasons of why I can't
Speaker 2: do something, And it's so much easier to like, I
Speaker 2: don't know why, but I find it easier to rationalize
Speaker 2: out loud because you're almost talking to another person and
Speaker 2: you can catch yourself.
Speaker 1: I love that so much because even see how I
Speaker 1: set out loud my thing and you're like, oh wow,
Speaker 1: that's passive aggressive. Yeah was in your head. You're like, oh,
Speaker 1: that's just normal. Yeah, it's just like in your head.
Speaker 1: And that's even like journaling. Often when I'm like feeling
Speaker 1: anxious or like overwhelmed or something, I journal because often
Speaker 1: when I put things on pages, I'm like, oh, that's
Speaker 1: a bit traumatic to order, you know, yeah, and you
Speaker 1: put it down. And so I love that of like
Speaker 1: even speaking it and being like, oh, just checking in.
Speaker 1: How am I speaking to myself? Yeah, so just something
Speaker 1: to check in. I think that's a great thing. A
Speaker 1: tear of like saying the thing or writing it down
Speaker 1: and noticing, like, would I actually speak this or say
Speaker 1: this to my best friend? What's the second rule? Keep
Speaker 1: the promises you make with yourself, my dear. It's what
Speaker 1: I'm working on this year. I love it. So guys.
Speaker 1: If you remember the podcast I told you guys about
Speaker 1: that book called Infinite Self, Wait fifty five Steps to
Speaker 1: Your Infinite Self. I believe I think it was thirty three.
Speaker 1: Ah fuck, then Age Talk guys had fifty Anyway, I
Speaker 1: think it's thirty three. It's s thirty. It is step
Speaker 1: It's by Stuart Wild And one of the steps he said,
Speaker 1: this was so profound to me in the moment, and
Speaker 1: he said make your word law, meaning what you say
Speaker 1: to yourself, you follow through, otherwise you don't say you're
Speaker 1: going to do the thing. And I loved this because
Speaker 1: he said if you're constantly saying things and then not
Speaker 1: following through, that is telling your own brain that you
Speaker 1: don't follow through. And so he's he's like, you're just
Speaker 1: going to end up in this cycle of not falling
Speaker 1: through because that's what we all do. And you don't
Speaker 1: want to be that person. It's like that fleaky friend.
Speaker 1: You're like they always fucking bail or like you just
Speaker 1: know what they're going to do.
Speaker 2: You'll make plans, but you'll make plans at the same
Speaker 2: time as the plans because you know it won't happen.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And it's like that's not the vibe. No, And
Speaker 1: I think just such a huge thing we can start doing.
Speaker 1: And even noticing the part in us that wants to
Speaker 1: make the promise and wants to say I'm going to
Speaker 1: go to gym seventeen times and I'm going to be
Speaker 1: this person and blah blah blah blah, and like where's
Speaker 1: that coming from? So true? Who are you saying that for?
Speaker 1: What are you saying that for? Even that's cooled to
Speaker 1: like look at that that yeah, and just even notice
Speaker 1: yourself of like wanting to like make these promises, but
Speaker 1: then taking it back to Okay, I have to be
Speaker 1: really sure and I have to follow through because this
Speaker 1: is going to be build self trust and this is
Speaker 1: going to help me become the person I want to become. Yeah,
Speaker 1: Because I think when you feel so solid yourself off,
Speaker 1: you know, if you're going to say something, you're going
Speaker 1: to do it. Like that's a pretty fucking incredible feeling. Absolutely,
Speaker 1: it's like unwavering. There'll just be no doubt because.
Speaker 2: You'll know that no matter what comes into your path,
Speaker 2: you will get it done.
Speaker 1: Yes, And I think you know, even taking it back
Speaker 1: to the seven rules of being your own best friend,
Speaker 1: it's like you wouldn't tell your bestie Okay, i'll be
Speaker 1: in the morning, I'll meet you in the morning at
Speaker 1: seven am gym class that you know she doesn't want
Speaker 1: to go to alone too, and then just bail last minute,
Speaker 1: Like dog, you don't do that, and if you do,
Speaker 1: you're a dog. Yees, Like look, it's like if you
Speaker 1: can't help it, that's fine, You're not a dog. That's
Speaker 1: so true. So that's a big thing of like why
Speaker 1: do we do this to ourselves? And also my big
Speaker 1: thing too is like if you don't think you're gonna
Speaker 1: do it, just don't say it. That's exactly it. And
Speaker 1: that's why I said before, I like, notice that part
Speaker 1: of you that wants to say something even though you no,
Speaker 1: you're not going to follow through. Yeah, because that's like
Speaker 1: that's all ego, so true. So a big thing with
Speaker 1: this rule, what I wanted to start doing is simply
Speaker 1: that if you not, like, if you don't think or
Speaker 1: there's a possibility that you're going to bail or you're
Speaker 1: like not going to do the thing, just don't say it.
Speaker 1: And notice how many things come up.
Speaker 2: That's so interesting because that's something I started doing as well,
Speaker 2: is just being so mindful of what I commit to
Speaker 2: so that I can make my word law. And the
Speaker 2: other thing that I did on especially with things like Jim,
Speaker 2: is probably the easiest one for me, because that was
Speaker 2: something I was super flaky with with myself. Like it's
Speaker 2: like I'd never make plans with my friend and then
Speaker 2: bail a gym session, but if I made plans with myself,
Speaker 2: I would just not go. And interesting, so you almost
Speaker 2: held your you hold your friends above yourself.
Speaker 1: Yes.
Speaker 2: And when I decided to make my word law, if
Speaker 2: I said I'm going to gym, even if I really
Speaker 2: didn't feel like it, I would physically make myself go,
Speaker 2: even if it took me half now to get into
Speaker 2: my active word twenty minutes to get into the car.
Speaker 2: I'd go to the gym and I'd get on the
Speaker 2: treadmill or something and do fuck all. Yeah, I just
Speaker 2: physically get.
Speaker 1: There and then I'd go. But my word was a
Speaker 1: long yeah, no, no, But then how shout there? It's fine,
Speaker 1: it's great.
Speaker 2: Until I started fasting, obviously, but yeah, Like I was
Speaker 2: going three or four times a week by myself. And
Speaker 2: it even got to the point where my best friend,
Speaker 2: who I was going to gym with all the time,
Speaker 2: was like said to me, She's like, you're just going
Speaker 2: all the time, and I feel like, now I'm relying
Speaker 2: on you to go to gym.
Speaker 1: When you were relying on me. And I was like, yeah,
Speaker 1: but how cool is I feeling a good feeling? Like no,
Speaker 1: I just go for myself exactly.
Speaker 2: And when you build that habit, it's so much easier
Speaker 2: to make your word law in everything else.
Speaker 1: I love that so much. Rule three, turn up the
Speaker 1: volume of your inter wish am You guys know, my
Speaker 1: life change when I started trusting my intuition, And it
Speaker 1: honestly started with that very first step. Fuck it was
Speaker 1: a big one, but quitting my corporate job and like
Speaker 1: doing this thing where it's like, logically, it didn't make
Speaker 1: sense for me to leave law when I had nothing
Speaker 1: to go to and I had this great, shiny new
Speaker 1: law job after I had done a six year degree
Speaker 1: like literally got to the end finish, got the certificate
Speaker 1: could practice law, and I was like, see, yeah, like
Speaker 1: logically that makes zero sense. Yeah, but intuitively it made
Speaker 1: perfect sense to me. And it was probably the first
Speaker 1: time in my life that I ever trusted my intuition wholeheartedly,
Speaker 1: and it was the best decision I ever made. And
Speaker 1: it was such a moment for me to be like,
Speaker 1: oh no, I've got my own back, Like I've got
Speaker 1: my own back and I can do hard things and
Speaker 1: they It was also the first time ever I made
Speaker 1: like an a not logical choice because I'm a huge
Speaker 1: logic person. Yeah, and that was just yeah, that was
Speaker 1: such a catalyst for me. And then ever since then,
Speaker 1: I've been really working on strengthening my intuition, listening to
Speaker 1: my intuition, And I think it's like, you know, it's
Speaker 1: the whole thing of you know, when you just know
Speaker 1: something and then you don't listen to it and then
Speaker 1: it kind of bites you on the ass. Yeah, you're
Speaker 1: like wuck. And I think we all have those moments
Speaker 1: where we really just should have locked into our intuition
Speaker 1: and then even a tear what we were talking about the
Speaker 1: other day at the team lunch of every single one
Speaker 1: of you had these really beautiful moments of it didn't
Speaker 1: logically make sense, but then it made you step or
Speaker 1: lead into something where you're like wow, like you know
Speaker 1: this is my dream path? Yeah? Literally hmmm. And so
Speaker 1: that's why I think, oh, so many people don't listen
Speaker 1: to their intuition or just think it's like, well, I
Speaker 1: should always use my logical brain, I should be quote
Speaker 1: unquote smart, and how much that's all fucking us up? Well,
Speaker 1: I also feel like listening to your intuition.
Speaker 2: I did, and I feel like other people might maybe
Speaker 2: even have rose colored glasses of what it'll feel like
Speaker 2: listening to your intuition, Like it's gonna feel easy and
Speaker 2: great and everything's gonna be happy and fall into place
Speaker 2: straight away. Listening to your intuition is hard. Can we
Speaker 2: actually speak on this. I'm so glad you brought this up.
Speaker 2: I'm trying to remember what was the decision I made
Speaker 2: the other day.
Speaker 1: Oh, I actually can't tell you the details. I can't
Speaker 1: tell Yeah, I just not appropriate. But I had to
Speaker 1: make a really hard decision, and it was that it
Speaker 1: was an intuitive decision. Logically, I'm like, I can't do
Speaker 1: the logical side. I've got to trust. But it's not
Speaker 1: like because often even and I'm going to contradict myself, yeah,
Speaker 1: even on this podcast, I'm like, it's gonna feel like
Speaker 1: flowy in a line, but it's like it actually didn't
Speaker 1: feel good the whole time. Literally, Now I'm like, yeah,
Speaker 1: it feels good, but it's like during the actual decision making,
Speaker 1: I'm like fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck, and it feels hard.
Speaker 1: And I remember plugging to my coach about this and
Speaker 1: her saying, like it does, like it doesn't always have
Speaker 1: to feel good. But then this gets to be the
Speaker 1: part where you strengthen this side of yourself, yes, where
Speaker 1: you lock in and you're like, every decision doesn't have
Speaker 1: to feel easy and flowy. It actually gets to be hard,
Speaker 1: but still be in the direction I want to go.
Speaker 1: Because also, if you think about it, it's like, if
Speaker 1: you want something different, you've got to fucking move different exactly.
Speaker 1: So it's like if you just say, if you're just
Speaker 1: in that zone of like I'm just gonna pick the
Speaker 1: thing that's like most comfortable, you're always going to be comfortable. Yes,
Speaker 1: And I feel like some people might start listening to
Speaker 1: the intuition, feel things getting hard, and then go, oh,
Speaker 1: I must have made the wrong decision. I need to
Speaker 1: turn around and go back and do a three sixty.
Speaker 1: Oh go that, No, don't, just you gotta like fight
Speaker 1: through the mud, because to my intuison was one of
Speaker 1: the hardest things I've ever did. Yeah, many meltdowns like
Speaker 1: melt down. I'd love to see it here. In a meltdown.
Speaker 1: It's pretty entertaining. When you start trusting your intuition, life
Speaker 1: does change, but it's not always going to feel good.
Speaker 2: Yeah, remember that, really, remember that if you take anything
Speaker 2: from this.
Speaker 1: Episode, Gosh You're funny rule for stay true to your boundaries.
Speaker 1: Oh sounds hard. It's also hard. They were all a
Speaker 1: bit hard, are they? Again, this is something I've really
Speaker 1: been delving into, and I think it's like, let's just
Speaker 1: be fucking honest. If you're not respecting your own boundaries,
Speaker 1: how do you expect anyone else to respect your boundaries? Yep.
Speaker 1: If you're that friend who's getting walked over, who's not
Speaker 1: getting treated right, I would really be looking internally what's
Speaker 1: happening with your boundaries because I really guarantee people only
Speaker 1: treat you in a way, not that you let them,
Speaker 1: but it's like, let's just say it this way, and
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna be really fucking honest with you. There's
Speaker 1: certain people where it's like I know their boundaries and
Speaker 1: it's like I don't fuck with them, yeah. And then
Speaker 1: there's other people where I know I can kind of
Speaker 1: fuck with them, like let's just be really honest. Yeah,
Speaker 1: And it's like and I like, I'm not saying each
Speaker 1: one is like right or wrong, but it's like that's
Speaker 1: the energetic of what boundaries are. Yes. So, if you're
Speaker 1: someone where you're feeling resentment towards other people, you're feeling
Speaker 1: like you're getting walked over, you feel like you're not
Speaker 1: getting treated right, you feel like you're putting more into
Speaker 1: the relationship than they are. Yeah, I think you gotta
Speaker 1: look at your boundaries and tided them up, tidy them up,
Speaker 1: clean them up, because there's probably some leaky boundaries happening there. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and you kind of you don't know how to put
Speaker 1: them in and how to be because trust me, like
Speaker 1: energetically I can feel if someone's got strong boundaries, like
Speaker 1: I'm not fucking with them. No, it's just like you're
Speaker 1: just like that's how it is. You work around it.
Speaker 1: And that's even a thing like that's I guarantee you
Speaker 1: in your life you'll have people who you just don't
Speaker 1: fuck with. You're like, oh no, I'm not going there exactly.
Speaker 1: I guarantee they have the strongest boundaries or just certain boundaries.
Speaker 1: So true. So that's what I want you guys to
Speaker 1: think about. And I think, like even from the perspective
Speaker 1: of getting really fucking honest with yourself and being like,
Speaker 1: where am I actually feeling really drained or really not good?
Speaker 1: And where do I need to tighten up my boundaries,
Speaker 1: whether that's having more time for myself, for my family,
Speaker 1: for my hobbies, this and that. So I can feel
Speaker 1: a certain way because for instance, I think a lot
Speaker 1: of people. They can get in this victim mentality of
Speaker 1: like I feel a certain way and poor me, and
Speaker 1: then not taking the action of like okay, well where
Speaker 1: you actually, you know, spending your time? Where are you
Speaker 1: actually not putting in things for yourself? And I think
Speaker 1: a big thing is like being okay with that, and
Speaker 1: I like going back to seven rules of being your
Speaker 1: own best friend. It's if your best friend is like, hey,
Speaker 1: I need the weekend, I need some chill time, I
Speaker 1: need time to myself. I'm not going to be like no,
Speaker 1: you must be you must say that with me, You're
Speaker 1: like cool, amazing. So it's like why don't we do
Speaker 1: that to ourselves, especially if we're feeling drained, but also
Speaker 1: in other avenues of like if someone speaks to you
Speaker 1: in a way that doesn't feel you know, great to
Speaker 1: your appropriate have that conversation where you say, hey, that
Speaker 1: didn't feel good when that you spoke to me like that?
Speaker 1: Moving forward? Can you not speak to me like that? Yes?
Speaker 1: So simple, so simple. Yeah, we don't say it, And
Speaker 1: then in our head we're like, can't believe she spoke
Speaker 1: to me like that? How dash she? But also I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna say anything to her, they were just upset. Literally,
Speaker 1: So boundaries is such a huge thing and it's also
Speaker 1: like what you allow will continue.
Speaker 2: And I think something that helped me with boundaries is
Speaker 2: if you ever set a boundary and it triggers someone,
Speaker 2: it's either a because they want to set the same
Speaker 2: boundary for themselves and they haven't, yes, or B they
Speaker 2: were abusing your lack of boundaries yeah, and you don't yeah,
Speaker 2: and you don't want them around. So if someone's a
Speaker 2: bit triggered, let them be triggered, Let them work through
Speaker 2: it at their own pace, and they can come back
Speaker 2: when they're ready. But they'll know that your boundary is
Speaker 2: firm and that's what's best for you.
Speaker 1: That what's the next rule? Rule number five is dish
Speaker 1: out the compliments. She's simple, She's simple this one. She's
Speaker 1: self explanatory. Again. What I want you guys to do
Speaker 1: with this is literally, if you're not driving, go somewhere
Speaker 1: where there's a mirror, look at yourself, look at yourself
Speaker 1: in like little black bits of your eyes, really look
Speaker 1: dead set at yourself, and tell yourself a compliment that
Speaker 1: you mean can be. It doesn't have to be saying
Speaker 1: about your physical appearance. It can be something about whatever
Speaker 1: you like about yourself. But I just think so often
Speaker 1: we give out so many compliments to other people, and
Speaker 1: we constantly lift others up, but we rarely do it
Speaker 1: to ourselves. And it's just like this whole concept of like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, imagine if I treated myself, you know,
Speaker 1: as well as I do the people around me. So true,
Speaker 1: I will work on it. Will update number six, Know
Speaker 1: your priorities. I love this one too. I love this
Speaker 1: one so much. And this I feel like this really
Speaker 1: came about since doing the seven day Clarity course at
Speaker 1: the start of the year and really being like, fuck,
Speaker 1: what's actually important to me? Yeah, because it's it's so
Speaker 1: interesting because we make, like, you know, at the start
Speaker 1: of the year, we make goals and we make vision boards,
Speaker 1: and usually like they're very aspirational and they're very like
Speaker 1: career driven and very subjective and very specific to something
Speaker 1: we want to push forward, usually like Korea or something
Speaker 1: health related. Yeah, but rarely do we like make them
Speaker 1: fit everything and really understand what's important to us from
Speaker 1: a level of for example, knowing that you need a
Speaker 1: loan time, Yeah, like you don't make goals around that
Speaker 1: to you, but that might be a priority for you
Speaker 1: to thrive and be happy. That's so true. And that's yeah.
Speaker 1: When I did the do it for the future self course,
Speaker 1: I remember being like profounded in the way of oh
Speaker 1: my god, like I've got these semon buckets and I
Speaker 1: know they're all empty like except for it oken career,
Speaker 1: but like make goals for like two of them. Yeah,
Speaker 1: So that's like another big thing too, have like know
Speaker 1: what actually fills you up. And of course you don't
Speaker 1: have to do the do it for your future self
Speaker 1: cause you can just like understand of what in life
Speaker 1: fills you up, not just like the aspirational of like
Speaker 1: make a million dollars or like becom a whatever in
Speaker 1: your career. Yeah, those sorts of things. Is like knowing
Speaker 1: your priorities of I actually really thrive when I have
Speaker 1: a lone time, or I actually really love you know
Speaker 1: blah blah.
Speaker 2: Blah exactly, And I loved it, and I love to
Speaker 2: do it for your future self course for that reason
Speaker 2: because it's like, in for lack of a better example,
Speaker 2: say your goal is to go to Europe that year
Speaker 2: and have bousion euro summer, right that that will obviously
Speaker 2: have shommy, go.
Speaker 1: Yeah, should we all gone ready?
Speaker 2: My back's back is like that'll have some financial goal
Speaker 2: attached to it, but something that fills your cup and
Speaker 2: a bucket of yours is maybe going to live music events,
Speaker 2: because that's just something that really fills you up. And
Speaker 2: you have one hundred dollars to spend that week and
Speaker 2: you can save it for your trip as bonus money
Speaker 2: on your trip, you can spend it on a concert ticket,
Speaker 2: or you can buy yourself an outfit for something, and
Speaker 2: actually going, oh, it's so fine for me to guilt
Speaker 2: free spend this money on this concert because that's my
Speaker 2: bucket and that's something that fills me up and I've
Speaker 2: already hit other goals for my financial goal. Or go, oh,
Speaker 2: I have one hundred dollars, do I want to spend
Speaker 2: it on a ticket or do I want to spend
Speaker 2: it towards my savings for my trip and actually evaluate
Speaker 2: what would fill me up more now and for the
Speaker 2: whole year.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And I think that's the thing is also it's
Speaker 1: like no one's gonna know that answer, accept you. Yeah,
Speaker 1: But even having a process where you know yourself, you
Speaker 1: know what your goals are, what you're clear on what
Speaker 1: fills you up and then having that kind of logical
Speaker 1: process of like, cool, I actually get to pick because
Speaker 1: I think so many people they're just like they're not.
Speaker 2: Clear, no, and then they feel guilt if they do
Speaker 2: something yes, maybe not aligned with their big goals, and
Speaker 2: but that then could be filling up your other four
Speaker 2: buckets that you've not made goals for.
Speaker 1: Yes, exactly, love our bucket. Yeah, love this for us.
Speaker 1: That's a good bucket, all right, guys. The last rule,
Speaker 1: give yourself permission to go after it. I love this room,
Speaker 1: I love them all. I love this one. But I
Speaker 1: think I said that a tear wanted to create a
Speaker 1: whole course on that I did. I was like, maybe
Speaker 1: just an episode.
Speaker 2: If you want to cause slide into Dotty's DMS and
Speaker 2: tell her.
Speaker 1: That I was right. I'm kidding. I love this rule
Speaker 1: so much because again I think and even tell me
Speaker 1: how you are a tea. But with my friends, I'm like, yes,
Speaker 1: go after it, do the thing like my best friends.
Speaker 1: He was in this midst of like, should she hire
Speaker 1: someone because she's got a small beers? She the first person?
Speaker 1: Should you hire someone? I'm like, hi, someone do it?
Speaker 1: So like, oh, my God, do the thing. And then
Speaker 1: when it comes to ourselves, we're like, should we do it?
Speaker 1: I don't know. We call everyone, we're like, what's gonna happen?
Speaker 1: And it's like, imagine if you gave that energy that
Speaker 1: you give to other people who you want to see succeed,
Speaker 1: who you're proud of, who you believe in, to yourself.
Speaker 1: I'm like, no, I get to just go and do.
Speaker 2: The thing, even the self assurance that you know they'll
Speaker 2: get there.
Speaker 1: Yes. Like, one of my best friends was a bit
Speaker 1: nervous to apply for a job and I'm like, what
Speaker 1: do you I'm like, this job is yours. Like it's
Speaker 1: literally got your name on it. This ad was put
Speaker 1: out with your name on it.
Speaker 2: Don't be silly. But vice versa. I get anxious. I'm like,
Speaker 2: maybe I'm not good enough, maybe this, maybe that. But
Speaker 2: to other people, you're like, of.
Speaker 1: Course it's in the bag. We are limiting ourselves so much. Yeah,
Speaker 1: because also, what's the worst thing that can happen? You
Speaker 1: go after it, you fail, and you're trying back where
Speaker 1: you are right now. Great, and you're back where you
Speaker 1: are right now. Oh And I love this because the
Speaker 1: sentence that we touched. This rule was if you don't
Speaker 1: risk failure, you'll never have the chance to succeed. And
Speaker 1: it's like, gals, just go do the thing. I love that.
Speaker 1: I love that phrase, follow all the rules and then
Speaker 1: go do the thing. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Do you have any tips on how people can maybe
Speaker 2: reframe their concept of failure?
Speaker 1: Well, I think it's exactly what you just said then
Speaker 1: is like, Okay, what happens. I go try and do
Speaker 1: the thing, the thing doesn't work out, and I'm just
Speaker 1: back where I am now. Yeah, so it's like the
Speaker 1: worst thing that can happen is I'm back where I am? Now?
Speaker 1: What am I worried about it? But literally, yeah, like,
Speaker 1: oh that's interesting. Yeah, I love that.
Speaker 2: Another way that I love to look at it, and
Speaker 2: I actually heard it from an interview events Sheering is
Speaker 2: where he said, when you're getting really good at something
Speaker 2: or you're taking risks, you're in inevitably gonna have mistakes,
Speaker 2: You're gonna be bad at things, or you're gonna maybe
Speaker 2: have an off day. And the example he gave was
Speaker 2: like songwriting and performing, You're gonna write bad songs, but great,
Speaker 2: the shit's out of you. Keep going and it's almost
Speaker 2: like everyone has shit inside them that has to come out.
Speaker 2: You're gonna have bad days, You're gonna make mistakes, but
Speaker 2: better out than in.
Speaker 1: Everyone's got shit inside them recon No.
Speaker 2: I love that because it's like, even if it's not
Speaker 2: as bad as you probably think it is, you're gonna
Speaker 2: have an off day, and but don't beat yourself up
Speaker 2: about it. Just go oh great, Like that day's over.
Speaker 2: Now I get to have all the good ones.
Speaker 1: And also like just who fucking cares me? Like the
Speaker 1: amount of weight. We're like, oh but this person will
Speaker 1: think this and this will happen, and blah blah blah.
Speaker 1: It's like no one cares. They're probably not even looking.
Speaker 1: No one literally no one cares. Mark, you know, just
Speaker 1: go do the thing, all right, guys. I hope you
Speaker 1: enjoyed this. We fucking obviously love these yeah and rules,
Speaker 1: and again we're like I have been living by these,
Speaker 1: I swear by them. They're incredible. I feel like we
Speaker 1: can all make some audits and changes from this episode,
Speaker 1: and I hope you enjoyed it. Thank you so much
Speaker 1: for listening to another episode of the Rise and Conquer podcast.
Speaker 1: If you enjoyed it and want more, come connect with
Speaker 1: us on Instagram at Riseinconquer dot podcast and join our
Speaker 1: Facebook discussion group, a Rise and Concer podcast community. We're
Speaker 1: an independent podcast and we have a small team, so
Speaker 1: we do appreciate your time and support. If you have
Speaker 1: a spare moment, a follow or subscribe on whatever platform
Speaker 1: you listen to would be so amazing, And look, if
Speaker 1: you're feeling extra kind, a review on Apple Podcasts would
Speaker 1: be great.