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Speaker 1: It's the Happy Families Podcast. It's the podcast for the

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Speaker 1: time poor parent who just wants answers now.

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Speaker 2: So when we walk into the house, we're especially at

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Speaker 2: least two gorgeoust kids coming running up. What's more important

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Speaker 2: that working email that can wait another half hour or

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Speaker 2: just giving them that attention that they want in that moment.

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Speaker 1: And now here's the stars of our show, my mom

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Speaker 1: and dad.

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Speaker 3: I've got stage fright today. Alison Langdon joins us for

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Speaker 3: the Happy Families Podcast. Ali was my what was the

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Speaker 3: host of parental Guidance? I was going to say with

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Speaker 3: my co host, I just I just promoted myself. This

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Speaker 3: stoped Justin Colson here with Kylie, my wife, and Mundo,

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Speaker 3: our six kids and Allison Langdon. Good morning to you.

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Speaker 2: Good morning co host. How are you a co host?

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Speaker 4: I'm so glad you know how to put him in

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Speaker 4: his place, Allie.

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Speaker 3: He needs it every now and again. I'm literally shrinking

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Speaker 3: under the table right now. Oh gosh, wow, So we've

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Speaker 3: watched three weeks of amazing TV. I don't think that

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Speaker 3: family life and parenting has ever been under the spotlight

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Speaker 3: on Australian television, maybe even international television in the way

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Speaker 3: that this show has done it, and Alie, we wanted

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Speaker 3: to get you on the show to have a conversation

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Speaker 3: with you about what it was like to literally be

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Speaker 3: in the driver's seat to host this brand new show

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Speaker 3: that has done really well by any measure. The way

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Speaker 3: we're going to do this, though, is because I was

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Speaker 3: on the show with you. Rather than me asking you questions,

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Speaker 3: I already know the answers to. Kylie is going to

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Speaker 3: run the interview, and this is Kylie's first ever interview.

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Speaker 3: Like normally, I do the whole thing and Kylie sort

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Speaker 3: of chimes in with some really great conversation, but today

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Speaker 3: it's all Kylie.

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Speaker 2: This is very exciting because I was a bit worried

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Speaker 2: it was going to be you justin But now I'm

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Speaker 2: working with a professional that it's Kylie. Well, I'm on board.

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Speaker 2: Cop it does he also copy it at home, Kylie.

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Speaker 3: A little bit, a little bit. This is what Ali

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Speaker 3: did to me for the entire feeling of the show

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Speaker 3: the whole time, just kept putting me back in my box.

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Speaker 4: There are so many things we can tell talk about

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Speaker 4: with the show, Allie, but before we even get to

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Speaker 4: the show, I just need to know what it was

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Speaker 4: like working with Justin. I mean, I have to live

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Speaker 4: with him, and that can be tricky at times. But

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Speaker 4: I'm just wondering how intense was it really?

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Speaker 2: Look I mean, I've got to admit that by the

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Speaker 2: time we did some long days and we get to

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Speaker 2: eleven o'clock at night, it's like, oh, thank goodness, he's

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Speaker 2: going home to Kylie and she can deal with him now,

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Speaker 2: and then I've got a good break. I don't know

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Speaker 2: how you've done it for as long as you've done it. No.

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Speaker 2: I loved working with your husband. He's a wonderful manager,

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Speaker 2: a great sense of humor, great advice, and just to

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Speaker 2: be sitting next to him. And as Justin said, we're

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Speaker 2: going through this it's a brand new experiments. We're not

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Speaker 2: looking at something that someone's done overseas and copying it.

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Speaker 2: We're kind of we were winging it, which is kind

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Speaker 2: of how our parent by the way, and we also

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Speaker 2: making it up as we went. And it was just

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Speaker 2: so fun and it was lovely being in that room

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Speaker 2: with these ten different parenting styles, all very different, but

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Speaker 2: all very like of celebrating the different styles that that

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Speaker 2: you know that work for different people.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I love that word. Celebrate. I'm wondering, Ellie, how

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Speaker 3: do you parent?

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Speaker 4: Now that you've seen the show and you've seen all

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Speaker 4: these different parenting styles, what would you say your parenting

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Speaker 4: style is.

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Speaker 2: Well, if we did a season two, I'd be the

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Speaker 2: perfect parent. I had all these conversations with Justin and

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Speaker 2: I break. I'd be going, Okay, so I'm asking for

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Speaker 2: a friend if you do this, No, Allie, you can't

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Speaker 2: do that, okay, and I've got this other friend so no. Basically,

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Speaker 2: Justin and the other parents in the room helped me

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Speaker 2: adjust what we do and what I actually found in

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Speaker 2: all seriousness going through this experiment is that my parenting

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Speaker 2: style and my husband's parenting style is a little bit inconsistent.

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Speaker 2: So we've never really sat down and said, Okay, this

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Speaker 2: is how we want to do it. We're on the

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Speaker 2: same page in regards to this. My husband's probably a

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Speaker 2: little bit more strict than I am, but he is consistent.

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Speaker 2: I'm inconsistent. I think part of that is some days

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Speaker 2: time and what have you, and I just can't be

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Speaker 2: bothered having that fight. So the rules, you know, Monday

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Speaker 2: might be different Tuesday. And so I've really tried to

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Speaker 2: get my head around that more and so the kids

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Speaker 2: know where those boundaries are and those boundaries don't change.

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Speaker 2: And I think that's made a really big difference in

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Speaker 2: our household.

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Speaker 3: So let's just clarify as well. How old are your kids.

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Speaker 3: You've got a boy and a girl.

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Speaker 2: Were a little boy, Mac and he is four, and

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Speaker 2: a little girl, Scout, who is two. And to be clear,

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Speaker 2: the way our parent both of them is very different

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Speaker 2: because what works for him does not work for her.

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Speaker 3: Which one's your favorite today?

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Speaker 2: Neither of them today. They're both in my back. I

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Speaker 2: absolutely have favorites. So I tried to get you to

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Speaker 2: tell me which one was your favorite, and you never

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Speaker 2: fell for that, But I would happily tell you each day,

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Speaker 2: but always change. I figure as long as you don't

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Speaker 2: consistently have cities goes back to being inconsistent, right, as

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Speaker 2: long as you don't consistently have the same favorite child,

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Speaker 2: it's okay.

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Speaker 3: So we're recording this via zoom, and Ali is literally

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Speaker 3: hiding in the corner of a room so the kids

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Speaker 3: can't find.

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Speaker 2: I'm in my four year olds room in Max room,

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Speaker 2: sitting on his bed with construction Quilton and his Elmo,

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Speaker 2: and I've got his little shark toy and yeah, this

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Speaker 2: is the only place I could find where it's quiet

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Speaker 2: in my house.

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Speaker 3: Right now, Hey, I've got another quick question for you

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Speaker 3: before Collie jumps in. And I know it's Kylie's interview,

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Speaker 3: but I taled to Allie.

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Speaker 4: There's just no I know I've learned.

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Speaker 3: Well, I just thought of a question. I just thought

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Speaker 3: of something that we didn't talk about when we were

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Speaker 3: recording the show. And I'm I don't know if you're

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Speaker 3: going to give me a straight answer here. I'm guessing

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Speaker 3: because you're so so careful, you probably won't. But do

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Speaker 3: you have a favorite parenting style? I'm not going to

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Speaker 3: ask which couple you liked the most, although I'm tempted,

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Speaker 3: but do you have a style when you were sitting

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Speaker 3: in the room and watching the parents talk, and I

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Speaker 3: know that was good and bad to take from each

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Speaker 3: of them, but was there one that really just resonated

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Speaker 3: with you that you were like, I just want to

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Speaker 3: be a bit more like them.

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Speaker 2: I wouldn't say there was one particular style.

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Speaker 5: I took a little bit out of a few sort

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Speaker 5: of certain styles, but I think they sort of lean

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Speaker 5: in one particular direction. And so I mean I look

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Speaker 5: at what we do at home, and it's a little

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Speaker 5: bit between.

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Speaker 2: We're very much routine, We're a little bit helicopter. I'm

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Speaker 2: sometimes free range, you see when my kids are confused. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: but as I keep saying to my husband, look, they

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Speaker 2: need something to talk to their therapist about when they

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Speaker 2: grow up, and I feel I provide that material. But

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Speaker 2: I wouldn't actually say there was one style that worked

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Speaker 2: for me. I think, you know, there were some things

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Speaker 2: about say, for instance, free range parenting. There's a whole

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Speaker 2: lot I took away from that, but there was a

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Speaker 2: whole lot that didn't work for me that I couldn't do.

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Speaker 2: So I wouldn't have I haven't walked away and going okay, right,

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Speaker 2: I'm going to be a free range parent or I'm

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Speaker 2: going to be a French parent. Now I think I'm

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Speaker 2: still parent pretty much the same way. We've just adjusted

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Speaker 2: around the edges.

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Speaker 4: I think that that is actually the magic of the show.

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Speaker 4: It wasn't actually about highlighting that there was this one

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Speaker 4: golden standard. What it has done has opened up our

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Speaker 4: eyes to the fact that there are so many wonderful

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Speaker 4: ways to parent our children, and we can take so

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Speaker 4: much from each style and bring that into our own

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Speaker 4: personal makeup of what parenting looks like for our family.

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Speaker 2: Well, how has it changed to your family, Kylie? And

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Speaker 2: how are you parents?

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Speaker 3: Yeah? What did you notice when I came back from

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Speaker 3: filming the show? What did you see in me? Was

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Speaker 3: I different? It was supposed to be in the hot seat?

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Speaker 3: This is not mine? Seriously? Was I different at all?

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Speaker 3: Did you notice a difference when we got back together

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Speaker 3: after being away for a couple of weeks filming the show.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I think that you were more intentional. It can

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Speaker 4: be it can get really it can get really crazy

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Speaker 4: in our house with the different stooge daughters. I'm in Hello,

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Speaker 4: and sometimes it can be very easy to just get

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Speaker 4: swallowed up in the day to day running of things

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Speaker 4: and kind of forget that there's a whole lot of

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Speaker 4: little people following behind. And I think what I noticed

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Speaker 4: when you came home was just this absolute intention to

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Speaker 4: be in the space and be in the moment with

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Speaker 4: our kids.

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Speaker 3: That's a great answer. I feel like I've passed, but

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Speaker 3: I think.

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Speaker 2: That's a that's a really important thing you raise And

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Speaker 2: that was one of the things that came out for

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Speaker 2: me when we talked about screen time and that challenge

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Speaker 2: is that my husband when he'd walk in the door

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Speaker 2: after you finished work in the afternoon, the kids are

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Speaker 2: like daddy, daddy, daddy, and he's just you know, jumped

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Speaker 2: off the motorbike and he's coming in and in his

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Speaker 2: backs of checking emails and all. Or when I'd come

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Speaker 2: home from work and he's still doing work, phone calls

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Speaker 2: and all, that's all stopped. So when we walk into

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Speaker 2: the house, and especially at these two gorgeous little kids

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Speaker 2: coming and running up, what's more important that work email

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Speaker 2: that can wait another half hour or just giving them

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Speaker 2: that tension that they want in that moment. And we've

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Speaker 2: found that their behavior is better, you know, dinner time

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Speaker 2: an you know that that whole witching hour is far

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Speaker 2: less witchy because they have our full and complete attention.

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Speaker 2: So that roller coaster of emotions at that time of

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Speaker 2: the day I haven't gone away. I'm not saying you're

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Speaker 2: no tantrums in our house anymore, but it just it

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Speaker 2: just feels calmer, it feels happier. Everyone's connected.

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Speaker 3: I say this all the time. If you can get

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Speaker 3: the connection right, if kids feel like you're emotionally available

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Speaker 3: to them, you probably resolve eighty to ninety percent of

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Speaker 3: your behavioral challenges without ever having to do any quote

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Speaker 3: unquote discipline because kids have just been designed to connect. Hey,

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Speaker 3: right after the break, we're going to find out about

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Speaker 3: how an objective, unemotional journalists came just a little bit

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Speaker 3: undone during the filming of Parental Guidance. That's next on

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Speaker 3: the Happy Families Podcast.

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Speaker 1: It's the Happy Families Podcast.

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Speaker 6: Our Screens Creating Tension at Home, Tweens, teens and Screens

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Speaker 6: is a webinar to guide families to healthy, safe superscreen solutions.

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Speaker 6: Bye Today at happyfamilies dot com, dot au slash shop.

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Speaker 4: It's the Happy Families Podcast, the podcast for the time

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Speaker 4: poor parent who just wants answers now and today we

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Speaker 4: have the beautiful Allison Langdon with us and we are

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Speaker 4: discussing all things parental guidance.

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Speaker 3: Allison Langdon, mother of two youngsters four and two, and

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Speaker 3: the host host of I was going to say host

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Speaker 3: of the Today Show, but really that's nothing. Host of

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Speaker 3: Parental Guidance, That's what we're really. You know, you've hit

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Speaker 3: the big time, Ali when you're hosting the parenting reality

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Speaker 3: TV show on Channel nine.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, until you realize you've been brought on as

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Speaker 2: an example of what a bad parent like A few

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Speaker 2: moments like that was like, far, okay, I'm not going

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Speaker 2: to share my story here.

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Speaker 4: It's interesting when you very the very first question you

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Speaker 4: asked Justin at the beginning of the show first night,

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Speaker 4: you said, are you a perfect parent? And lots of

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Speaker 4: people ask those questions all the time of Justin and

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Speaker 4: I since he has started this journey with happy families,

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Speaker 4: and the reality is we're not. And the reason that

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Speaker 4: we get to be better and better is because we

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Speaker 4: immerse ourselves in it every day. This podcast helps us

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Speaker 4: to be reminded of the things that are so important

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Speaker 4: to us and help us to kind of be more

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Speaker 4: intentional with the way we parent. And I think that

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Speaker 4: that's what the show has done as well. It's just

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Speaker 4: allowed people to kind of open up dialogue and have

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Speaker 4: these beautiful conversations about how to be intentional in their parenting.

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Speaker 2: That's just beautiful. I think that's exactly what we hoped

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Speaker 2: the show would achieve, that everyone would just it just

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Speaker 2: make people think and perhaps think outside the square a

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Speaker 2: little bit about how they approach things and is there

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Speaker 2: a better way or is there a way of just

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Speaker 2: adjusting around the edges. That can mean that the whole

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Speaker 2: family benefits. So I think that how you've just summed

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Speaker 2: it up there, Kylie is perfect. It's exactly what we're

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Speaker 2: hoping to achieve, Allie.

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Speaker 4: Journalists are typically objective and unemotional about things, but it

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Speaker 4: seemed like you got a little bit caught up in

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Speaker 4: the moment and you were quite affected a few times.

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Speaker 4: Maybe put your mum hat on for a minute instead

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Speaker 4: of the journal hat. What hit you so hard as

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Speaker 4: you went through the show?

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Speaker 2: Ah? Well, I mean Justin will tell you I was

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Speaker 2: in tears quite a bit.

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Speaker 1: Roll.

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Speaker 2: I think because you have these moments from these parents

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Speaker 2: when and let's go right back to the very first

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Speaker 2: episode as an example, when we were talking about snacking,

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Speaker 2: and then with that first group there was that talk,

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Speaker 2: and there was also the talk with the kids without

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Speaker 2: climbing the rock wall, and this is moments where really

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Speaker 2: heartfelt from the parents, where it's we're just we're trying

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Speaker 2: to do our best, and it's sort of this idea

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Speaker 2: of maybe what we're doing isn't good enough, or maybe

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Speaker 2: we need to look at this, And I just you

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Speaker 2: felt the parent's emotion and you felt the love for

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Speaker 2: their kids in that time, and even if it was

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Speaker 2: a parenting style that I didn't necessarily agree with, some

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Speaker 2: of the things that they did and that I'm talking

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Speaker 2: here is our snacking family and also a disciplined family

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Speaker 2: in regards to soap on a toothbrush. Just hearing those

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Speaker 2: and hearing how they speak about the kids and how

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Speaker 2: much they'd love their kids and why they do it,

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Speaker 2: and the thought process behind and that I found was

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Speaker 2: really really emotional. And I just love the reason that

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Speaker 2: everyone came on that show. Everyone just wants to be

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Speaker 2: better and just wants to create beautiful, kind human beings

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Speaker 2: who grow up to be kind, caring adults. And so

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Speaker 2: everyone's got the same objective, we're just doing it all differently.

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Speaker 2: So when someone was feeling you know, when certain groups

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Speaker 2: are feeling the heat or sort of really felt that

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Speaker 2: their style was being picked apart, in some ways, I

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Speaker 2: felt for them in that moment, because you know it's

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Speaker 2: coming from a place of love.

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Speaker 3: When you're on social media or even when you're watching

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Speaker 3: a TV show, normally you just see this two dimensional character.

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Speaker 3: But I feel like in parental guidance, we got to

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Speaker 3: we got to know the parents, we got to understand

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Speaker 3: and we've got to see their humanity and their tenderness

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Speaker 3: and their vulnerability and their willingness to be open. And

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Speaker 3: for me, that's what moved me most. And I get

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Speaker 3: the sense that that was the same for you Ali.

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Speaker 3: And watching Timothy climb up that wall and fall down

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Speaker 3: and keep on pushing or I was boiling like a

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Speaker 3: baby with that one. Well I was, so.

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Speaker 2: Was I.

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Speaker 7: And also like the stranger danger because I think we've

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Speaker 7: all thought about that, how we have the conversation with

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Speaker 7: our kids. And Mac, my four year old, was up

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Speaker 7: with me and that when that when the show started

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Speaker 7: on that that first week and when it played in

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Speaker 7: like the teaser at the start of the show.

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Speaker 2: Mackie turned to me and he said, oh, Mummy, we

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Speaker 2: don't go We don't talk to strangers in the park,

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Speaker 2: do we, just in case they're a bad person. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: that's right, mate, he goes, except if they've got a

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Speaker 2: puppy and then it's okay. It was just that I'm like, oh, like,

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Speaker 2: this is why this conversation is so hard. This is

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Speaker 2: why we all felt it when when the kids who

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Speaker 2: went went off did because it does and how do

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Speaker 2: you have that conversation? And I know for us, we've

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Speaker 2: talked about it. I don't want my kids scared of

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Speaker 2: adults and scared thinking that, you know, every every person

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Speaker 2: is going to try and take them and abduct them.

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Speaker 2: Don't want them thinking that. I want them to think

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Speaker 2: that if they were in trouble and they were somewhere

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Speaker 2: where we weren't, I mean, don't send them to the

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Speaker 2: park yet on their own, them with them, But I'd

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Speaker 2: hate them to think that they couldn't go up to

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Speaker 2: an adult and ask someone for help if they needed it.

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Speaker 2: So how do you get that language right around a

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Speaker 2: conversation with something that's so important? And it just ripped

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Speaker 2: my heart out when I saw those kids go off

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Speaker 2: and just you put yourself in.

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Speaker 3: That situation, and to watch the parents go through it

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Speaker 3: as well. It was just and I expected Ali that

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Speaker 3: we were going to get some blowback. I thought that

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Speaker 3: there'd be some criticism of that. I didn't read, see

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Speaker 3: or hear anybody say anything negative about it, And I

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Speaker 3: think it's because everybody recognized just how important it was,

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Speaker 3: and they also saw the responses of the parents like

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Speaker 3: this is a point well made, full stop. End of

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Speaker 3: story and now the conversation has opened up.

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Speaker 4: This has been such an awesome conversation, Alie. I have

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Speaker 4: just loved getting your take on the show. One life

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Speaker 4: ask question to close things up, what changed for you

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Speaker 4: because of the show?

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Speaker 2: Goodness me. I think we're just far more conscious about

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Speaker 2: the type of parents we want to be, and so

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Speaker 2: we've changed. We've actually so we've actually changed how we parent.

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Speaker 2: I find myself now going to the park. I'm not

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Speaker 2: saying be careful, watch out, that's dangerous, because that's putting

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Speaker 2: all those ideas in the kid's head. So now when

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Speaker 2: Matt climbs something really high, I just don't watch.

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Speaker 3: It's easier, great stuff, keep it up, give it up.

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Speaker 3: Range going on there.

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Speaker 2: So there's a little bit of free range there. And

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Speaker 2: I think we've we've got a real planning place with

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Speaker 2: screen time. You know, we we've got to we're talking

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Speaker 2: the talk, we've got to walk it. And so we've

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Speaker 2: been really good and really consistent at just getting rid

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Speaker 2: of the screens at certain times of the day. And

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Speaker 2: you know, that's morning when my husband's with the kids.

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Speaker 2: I'm obviously not there in the mornings, but that afternoon

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Speaker 2: post daycare or how he gets home. It's just it's

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Speaker 2: properly family focused time and we're seeing a huge, huge

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Speaker 2: change in the kids and response. We're just not having

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Speaker 2: those horrible meltdowns and witching hours that we have previously.

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Speaker 2: So I think, yeah, it's it's made It's made us

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Speaker 2: much better parents and more and far more aware.

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Speaker 3: Love that, and I think that conversation is happening all

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Speaker 3: around the country with so many families. Alison Langdon, host

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Speaker 3: of The Today Show and Parental Guidance, thanks so much

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Speaker 3: for joining us on the Happy Families podcast.

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Speaker 2: I can't believe you pick your nose bet.

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Speaker 3: Other than that, I'll see you for season two. And

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Speaker 3: I'm not going to sanitize.

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Speaker 2: How you doing with Carli. You put up with it.

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Speaker 3: The Happy Families podcast is produced by Justin Rulan from

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Speaker 3: Bridge Media. Craig Bruce is our executive producer. If you'd

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Speaker 3: like more and fol about making your family happier, you

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Speaker 3: can find out everything you need at happy families dot

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Speaker 3: com dot aut.

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Speaker 2: I'd just like to say, Carly, then you should do

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Speaker 2: more of the talking.

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Speaker 3: What are you saying?

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Speaker 2: What is this Gosh