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Speaker 1: This is jem Nation.

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Speaker 2: We're Jonesy.

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Speaker 1: When I turned sixty at the beginning of the year,

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Speaker 1: I made a promise to myself that I would see

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Speaker 1: it as a third act. And all my friends feel

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Speaker 1: the same. Arriving in my sixties, I felt that there

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Speaker 1: was a lot to be grateful for, and I think

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Speaker 1: we all feel that we're not our parents at sixty.

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Speaker 1: Maybe I'm assuming that, but I think that's how a

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Speaker 1: lot of us feel.

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Speaker 2: Well.

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Speaker 1: Our next guest is doing a rebrand of turning sixty

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Speaker 1: as well. For Nigel Marsh, it's his third trimester, his

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Speaker 1: figure He's got his figure bag. The best selling author

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Speaker 1: of Fat forty and Fired, Fit fifty and Fired Up

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Speaker 1: is back with a new book, Smart, Stupid, and sixty.

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Speaker 1: Nigel Marsh, Hello, he goes, am, I right in thinking

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Speaker 1: that we're different to the sixty that our parents were.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, one hundred percent. My dear old dad wouldn't I

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Speaker 2: even understand why we were having conversations about enjoying your

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Speaker 2: old age. His hard wired upbringing was you just worked

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Speaker 2: very very very very very hard every single minute that

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Speaker 2: you had to care for and protect the people that

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Speaker 2: you love, and then you get buried.

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Speaker 1: It is interesting. And this is what my friends and

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Speaker 1: I talk about, is that we're kind of the Sandwich

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Speaker 1: generation in that we're dealing with parents who are getting

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Speaker 1: older and the sadness that we see coming at us there.

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Speaker 1: And we're also dealing with children because we might have

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Speaker 1: had children later in our lives who are who are

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Speaker 1: still living at home or are still young enough to

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Speaker 1: kind of we feel responsible for them. We're being squished

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Speaker 1: at both ends.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and I mean both my dear parents had passed away.

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Speaker 2: My mom passed away last year. I write about that

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Speaker 2: in the book Very Sad Process, But yeah, absolutely, it's gosh,

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Speaker 2: it can never end. But we have a situation where

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Speaker 2: for twenty seven years my house was full of four

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Speaker 2: kids and a dog. And the dog has died and

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Speaker 2: all the four kids have left home and both my

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Speaker 2: parents are underground. So if you look at different, you know,

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Speaker 2: fat forty and five was about having, you know, too

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Speaker 2: many people in the house, not enough and too much

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Speaker 2: to do. And now I'm sixteen and I've got an

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Speaker 2: empty house.

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Speaker 1: It's anod It's hard, isn't it. It really is hard.

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Speaker 1: And I lost my mum about fifteen or probably seventeen

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Speaker 1: years ago. And then when my sons left home to

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Speaker 1: go and study like I did, I just missed Mum

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Speaker 1: because I wanted to say to her, how did you

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Speaker 1: let me go? How could you be so gracious? Because

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Speaker 1: I found it so hard?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you know I had. I was talking to one

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Speaker 2: of the newspapers here where where I'm a bit of

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Speaker 2: a Victorian dad, where where I kicked all the kids

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Speaker 2: out of the house and then you so they don't

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Speaker 2: you know, there's no there's no down payment on a

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Speaker 2: unit or helping buying a car. It's you know, my

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Speaker 2: job is to keep you out of jail and off

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Speaker 2: drugs until you're eighteen. They were the only kids in

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Speaker 2: their school who didn't have tattoos or piercing because Victorian

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Speaker 2: dad didn't let them. And then after eighteen, do what

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Speaker 2: you want. You've got my unconditional love forever, and you

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Speaker 2: have a roof over your head. But I didn't say

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Speaker 2: a room, and I didn't say beda roof. So you

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Speaker 2: can come back and you can sleep on my kitchen

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Speaker 2: floor with a doner and I'll love you forever. But

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Speaker 2: you know it's now you are building your life. Adult

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Speaker 2: kids are such a gift. It is just fantastic. They

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Speaker 2: are hilarious, and that cliche about keeping you young and

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Speaker 2: keeping you open minded is one hundred percent true. I

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Speaker 2: had a conversation God love them about you know those

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Speaker 2: pronoun things on LinkedIn where you get Nigel Marsh him

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Speaker 2: and yeah, I mean, I literally don't understand. But they're

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Speaker 2: my kids and I love them, so I do it.

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Speaker 2: But if I didn't have the kids, it wouldn't it

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Speaker 2: would enter my head to say Nigel Marsh He, Well,

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Speaker 2: of course I'm a bloody he yeah, but you go,

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Speaker 2: do you know what? Keep your mind open? So they

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Speaker 2: are now you start by wiping their backsides and putting

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Speaker 2: them in car seats, and then you end up at

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Speaker 2: my rickety old age where they are stopping me being idiotic.

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Speaker 2: And that's why the book's called Smart Stupid. You are

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Speaker 2: both I'm looking at you, lovely people. Are I imagine

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Speaker 2: wiser than you both were when you were twenty. But

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Speaker 2: I also imagine, with the greatest of respect that you

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Speaker 2: probably regularly make mistakes and have regrets because none of

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Speaker 2: us are perfect. You know the power of paradoxy And

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Speaker 2: wouldn't it be boring if we knew it all and

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Speaker 2: never had things to learn. I like the fact that

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Speaker 2: my kids say things that I can't understand and I

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Speaker 2: tried to understand them and it keeps me. Yeah, it

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Speaker 2: keeps me vital, if that's the word. And Nigel, it's

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Speaker 2: great to talk to you. Smart, Stupid, and sixty is available.

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Speaker 1: Now in all Good bookstores and online Nigel Match.

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Speaker 2: Thank you, no, thank you guys, and love your show.