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Speaker 1: This is gem Nation with Jonesy.

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Speaker 2: Our next guest is one of the world's most beloved comics,

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Speaker 2: with sold out shows, books, stats of stacks of Netflix specials.

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Speaker 2: He's coming back to Australia with his stand up tour

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Speaker 2: that's called Terribly Funny, a comedy show that he warns,

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Speaker 2: contains jokes about all kinds of terrible things, and, as

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Speaker 2: he says, having political correctness at a comedy show is

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Speaker 2: like having health and safety at a rodeo.

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Speaker 3: The Fabulous Jimmy Carr Hallo.

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Speaker 1: Well, a couple of things there, A couple of notes.

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Speaker 4: Firstly, weird phone voice for the read I felt and

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Speaker 4: rodeo not rodeo.

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Speaker 2: But other than that, I was going to ask, I

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Speaker 2: don't even know how I say rodeo.

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Speaker 3: What did I say? I struggle with nachos and nachos.

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Speaker 3: And now this you said, like you.

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Speaker 4: Said, like rodeo, like rodeo. Drive it's a rodeo?

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Speaker 5: Is it a rodeo?

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Speaker 1: It's a rodeo.

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Speaker 3: Do Americans do American say rodeo or rodeo?

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Speaker 5: No, they say rodeo.

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Speaker 4: They say they say rodeo, but they say rodeo dry.

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Speaker 5: Yes, it's their fault. How about.

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Speaker 4: I mean, I'm not sure. I'm just breaking your balls.

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Speaker 4: This isn't going to sell any tickets, Amanda, what's going on?

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Speaker 6: Things are peachy, pie, I must say, though, you're right

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Speaker 6: about the safety at when I watch a rodeo these days.

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Speaker 6: Then suddenly wearing helmets when they get on the ball.

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Speaker 6: So for years they wore the big, the big cowboy hat.

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Speaker 6: Now they're wearing a helmet.

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Speaker 1: It's almost like they don't want to die. I'm so sorry, Jones.

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Speaker 1: I'm so sorry.

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Speaker 4: I don't know what to tell you. Yeah, and there's

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Speaker 4: no there's no there's no fun anymore?

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Speaker 1: Is that poor fact?

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Speaker 5: You can't do anything? Next I'll be taking lead out

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Speaker 5: of paint.

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Speaker 3: What next? What next?

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Speaker 1: And what are you gonna huff?

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Speaker 4: There?

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Speaker 5: Bag? Of my day? We used to drink leaded paint.

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Speaker 3: Obviously what happens and look at look at the results.

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Speaker 1: What happened?

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Speaker 5: Nothing wrong with Jimmy.

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Speaker 2: I've always been fascinated when I've seen you do Royal

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Speaker 2: Command performances because I know and.

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Speaker 3: Love your your edgy, hilarious material.

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Speaker 2: What's the protocol do you have to submit your stuff?

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Speaker 4: Well, I mean I think the I don't think the

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Speaker 4: royal family particularly fuss about what I mean, they're not

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Speaker 4: going to get that offended. But the best, the best

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Speaker 4: royal story I got is that we might as well

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Speaker 4: do a royal story, right. I played the Jubilee, not

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Speaker 4: this Jubilee, the one before that. I was somehow I

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Speaker 4: got a phone call like three days before staying someone's

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Speaker 4: dropped out. Will you come and like do a bit

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Speaker 4: of filler in between the bands? So I had to

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Speaker 4: like introduce Grace Jones in a Hulu. That was my

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Speaker 4: whole job right the day I saw it, and then great.

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Speaker 4: So then I like I go on stage and I say,

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Speaker 4: I say, everyone's you know, the Queen's there, you can

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Speaker 4: see her. And there's like two hundred and fifty thousand

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Speaker 4: people in the mall in London, right, So it's a

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Speaker 4: huge crowd of people, and there's all the kind of

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Speaker 4: greats of you know, Elton John's there and Stevie Wonder

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Speaker 4: and Paul McCartney, every and Ed Sheer and everyone's there.

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Speaker 4: Everyone's very nervous backstage, We're all, you know, what's the etiquette?

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Speaker 4: And then they just look at the queen and go

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Speaker 4: just call me mister Carr.

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Speaker 1: Pretty passable jo like it.

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Speaker 5: I like it.

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Speaker 1: The evening. The evening goes on, we get drunk, we

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Speaker 1: have fun.

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Speaker 4: We we end up at the at the palace at

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Speaker 4: a party, getting hammer drunk. I don't remember a lot

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Speaker 4: of it. I get a tap on the shoulder at

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Speaker 4: one point, I think that's it. I'm getting kicked out.

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Speaker 4: You see, everything seems right in the world.

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Speaker 1: I turned round.

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Speaker 4: It's Prince William with an outstretched hand to say alone.

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Speaker 4: And he just said, mister Carr.

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Speaker 5: And that's so. That's all you do, that's all you're doing.

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Speaker 5: That's that's so good.

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Speaker 4: That was the one as well where I bumped into

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Speaker 4: Prince Harry was there back when he was in the

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Speaker 4: Good Books.

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Speaker 1: This is like, it's got to be ten years ago whatever.

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Speaker 4: And I said to him because he'd just done a

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Speaker 4: story in the tabloids, going, oh, no one wants to

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Speaker 4: date me because it's so much pressure, you know, so

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Speaker 4: much pressure, press attention. And I was, I was breaking

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Speaker 4: his balls. I said, really, it's a lot of famously

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Speaker 4: girls don't want to be princesses.

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I remember famously.

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Speaker 4: Oh girl wants to be a princess, I said, I mean,

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Speaker 4: it turns out he was one hundred percent right.

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Speaker 1: There's a lot of pressure comes with being his missus.

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Speaker 4: But at the time he was single and and he

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Speaker 4: was single, so I said to him, why don't we

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Speaker 4: go on Sheryl Cole that she was cool at the time.

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Speaker 4: Was was there and I said, I've been teasing her

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Speaker 4: all day. She's single, you're single, she's broken up with

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Speaker 4: the guy, and she's very beautiful.

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Speaker 1: Do you mind coming over? He went, yeah, sure, very

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Speaker 1: kind of cool and.

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Speaker 5: Up for her and had a manifested anything. What happened?

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Speaker 5: What was the next thing?

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Speaker 1: I don't think. I don't. I don't think he had

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Speaker 1: enough game there, but you know he did all right, would.

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Speaker 3: Have instead one of the one direction guys, I think,

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Speaker 3: oh yeah, I had a baby with her? Yeah, no

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Speaker 3: wastaby and he was in denial anyway.

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Speaker 5: Yes, So Jimmy doesn't do pun human?

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Speaker 1: Yeah I do.

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Speaker 5: Do you do pun human?

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Speaker 6: Amanda has a skill, Jimmy. It's a skill like if

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Speaker 6: she was a superhero, Marvel super.

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Speaker 1: I knew we'd find something. She knew we find something.

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Speaker 1: She was good.

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Speaker 5: She would be pun she'd be long enough, she'd be

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Speaker 5: pun woman.

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Speaker 6: So you would have, you know, Spider Man Batman, Superman,

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Speaker 6: and then pun Woman would come along and have the

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Speaker 6: appropriate pun for whatever the occape diffuse the situation.

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Speaker 3: I'm sure it is a skill.

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Speaker 1: It's a valuable it's a valuable skill. Of course it is.

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Speaker 5: Of course it is.

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Speaker 3: If I don't get a cape with it, I'll be few.

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Speaker 5: You want a cape, absolutely, and a leotard.

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Speaker 1: I don't think you could say leotard anymore. There's quite

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Speaker 1: a lot of words that.

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Speaker 4: Are on my just general watch list. It's it's too

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Speaker 4: close to one of the ones you definitely can't say.

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Speaker 5: So let's just you can't. You can't say anything anymore.

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Speaker 6: You go into a rodeo or rodeo and the guys

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Speaker 6: that were in a helmet there, you know, you can't

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Speaker 6: do anything anymore.

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Speaker 5: Living well, it's so great to catch up with you.

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Speaker 6: Terribly Funny with Jimmy Carr on sale now at Jimmy

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Speaker 6: Carr dot com.

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Speaker 5: Thank you for joining us.

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Speaker 1: Thank you so much. A listener. I appreciate the plug,

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Speaker 1: you know, it makes a difference.

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Speaker 5: Thank you, Thank you, Jimmy.

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Speaker 4: Bye.