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Speaker 1: Mama, always always be careful.

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Speaker 2: Love those umboo.

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Speaker 1: Let We'll use your head. They will tear you lack

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Speaker 1: a purple talk. Oh no, no, no, yeah, yeah yeah yeah,

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Speaker 1: oh no no no. Hi. I'm Amanda and I'm Remy.

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Speaker 2: Welcome to It's Layer.

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Speaker 1: We're in a long distance friendship that started over twenty

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Speaker 1: years ago when we were in high school.

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Speaker 2: We'll be talking about all things life, love, family, anything

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Speaker 2: and everything else under the sun.

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Speaker 1: Delve deeper with us because in life, you know, jine

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Speaker 1: my layers.

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Speaker 2: Oh no no, yeah, yeah, yeah, gosh, and be look

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Speaker 2: at us again. Person, this is just amazing. It's amazing.

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Speaker 2: Season four.

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Speaker 1: We're coming at you. Wow.

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Speaker 2: This is so as you can tell when Prague when

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Speaker 2: we said before and I'm so happy to be here backyard.

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Speaker 1: I'm so that she came to see a little bit

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Speaker 1: of my neck of the woods. We'll fill you all

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Speaker 1: in on that as we go. But how have you

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Speaker 1: been since we good?

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Speaker 2: Good?

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Speaker 1: A lot?

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Speaker 2: Has I feel like so rusty? Even come back up,

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Speaker 2: come back on the podcast, because where am I? Where

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Speaker 2: am I? But yeah, here we are. How are you?

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Speaker 1: It's been crazy, like we've just had my wedding, my wedding, yeah,

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Speaker 1: Amanda's a mom mom now. Like so when we say

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Speaker 1: there's been a lot, yeah, has been so many things

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Speaker 1: that have changed, and I guess we were entering into

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Speaker 1: new eras in our lives. It's been so fascinating and

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Speaker 1: interesting that we've kind of switched together in the same year,

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Speaker 1: like things have changed for us, both monumental things. So yeah,

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Speaker 1: so we just thought we'd go in a little bit

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Speaker 1: on that we've been gone for a while and peaks

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Speaker 1: have been accent to I actually want to shout out

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Speaker 1: some of our listeners who avid listeners. Number one, we

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Speaker 1: got to shout out Mamady stays Strong, number one band.

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Speaker 1: But like so many people, Jojo, Joyce, Bumbi, Yes for Gumbi.

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Speaker 1: I mean there's so many Larissa, shout out to you, Naldi,

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Speaker 1: shout out to you, Shout out to you, like we

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Speaker 1: could shout out the whole squad. But thank you so

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Speaker 1: much everybody who like listens and shows love. Like honestly,

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Speaker 1: we're back because of y'all, because we be like where

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Speaker 1: y'all at times running out, So yeah, so thank you

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Speaker 1: so much. Caddy, I think too.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, there's so many. Sorry if you didn't name from me,

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Speaker 2: because I feel like we're gonna be like, hey, what

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Speaker 2: about me?

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Speaker 1: But you can comment on this episode and we'll holler

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Speaker 1: back at you too, like really know, we appreciate each

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Speaker 1: and every one of you.

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Speaker 2: So of course we've been gone for a while and

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Speaker 2: the streets.

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Speaker 1: Want to know, Amanda, what have you been up since

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Speaker 1: we last book, Like give us a bit more so,

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Speaker 1: As Ruby.

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Speaker 2: Said, I'm coming new mom now to a beautiful baby boy.

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Speaker 2: Jerome shout out to Jero, Jerry, j Jedy, roll me

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Speaker 2: other nicknames you've been getting my girl, But like, yeah,

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Speaker 2: we need to gonna go more deeper into it as

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Speaker 2: the season goes. Motherhood is a whole new hood, Like

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Speaker 2: its ghetto. Why didn't you guys tell me? But like no,

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Speaker 2: like seriously, it's the most beautiful and friend thing at

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Speaker 2: the same time. I call it a beautiful chaos, yeah,

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Speaker 2: because it's like your life is just up ended at

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Speaker 2: the same time, it's such a beautiful time and it's

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Speaker 2: something you can't equate to anything else unless I know,

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Speaker 2: like you sound as meanful mother's like you will see

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Speaker 2: when you're mother one night and you're like whatever, but

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Speaker 2: this is literally like yeah, I had to see it

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Speaker 2: to get it. Yeah, but I mean, yeah, we'll go

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Speaker 2: into that as the season goes, and in the meantime,

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Speaker 2: rumby you tell us what you've been up to you

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Speaker 2: why girl?

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Speaker 1: So where were you?

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Speaker 2: Girl?

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Speaker 1: So I am officially married, wild fully fully everything like

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Speaker 1: yinding it, yeah, like planned the whole other weddings, moving

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Speaker 1: into the wedding this era, like just like a Manda said,

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Speaker 1: we will have an episode because Charlie, Charlie, like it's

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Speaker 1: been real real, So that's really been it, like planning

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Speaker 1: the wedding, did a bit of travel during the summer.

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Speaker 1: Someone's coming to a close. But honestly, it's just been

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Speaker 1: bad and some work. So yeah, I'm relieved. Let me

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Speaker 1: just say, I've been waiting for.

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Speaker 2: This, lanning a waiting girl, don't. I don't vi you.

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Speaker 2: It was a beautiful wedding and I can't wait to

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Speaker 2: show you guys some more content about from that, because

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Speaker 2: I'm sure you've seen and been following on socials and

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Speaker 2: looked amazing.

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Speaker 1: And so did a Manday. I actually it was in

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Speaker 1: my wedding dress and I was like, I also want

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Speaker 1: to be in the dress. These ladies away the bribesmaids,

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Speaker 1: they looked stunning.

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Speaker 2: I was so happy.

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Speaker 1: But yeah, what does this new era signify for you? Wow?

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Speaker 2: Child? Think for me, especially with motherhood, it's not just

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Speaker 2: about me anymore. Someone else I have to consider, like

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Speaker 2: I selfishly like just think of him and think, oh,

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Speaker 2: what do I need to do for him? I mean

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Speaker 2: they're so helpless, right, Yes, so I think it's just

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Speaker 2: the ultimate It's not the ultimate sacrifice, I would probably say,

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Speaker 2: because you're like, wow, okay, I can't just up and

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Speaker 2: go like even coming here or doing things like. It's

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Speaker 2: just you have to always consider someone else when you're

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Speaker 2: living your life, which even more than when you do

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Speaker 2: with any other relationship. It's the oddest thing. And I

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Speaker 2: think that will go with time. Obviously the order they

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Speaker 2: become you let go of those reins. But you can

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Speaker 2: see why people treat like mamas treat their kids who're

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Speaker 2: like fifty like they're still ten.

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Speaker 1: Or something, because you spend so much of your time

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Speaker 1: nurturing them and taking care of them.

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Speaker 2: But it's how to let go, I think.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, so this.

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Speaker 2: New era with me signifies new change. Yeah, yeah, really

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Speaker 2: I get that.

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Speaker 1: I get that. I think for me, I'm still understanding

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Speaker 1: my new era. Like when people are like my like

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Speaker 1: call me by my married name. I'm just like, what

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Speaker 1: does it even mean? Like what does need to be married?

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Speaker 1: And you know, also realizing and we can go into

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Speaker 1: this like how people teach you shifts and it's like,

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Speaker 1: but I'm still Rumby, So I think this new era

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Speaker 1: is really like me five who Rumby is with this

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Speaker 1: new title without losing myself, but also coming to the

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Speaker 1: party for whatever, you know what I mean. So it was.

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Speaker 2: Similar because again you're considering someone else, yes, exactly someone else.

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Speaker 2: I think about it exactly.

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Speaker 1: What do I want? Oh no?

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Speaker 2: But what serves us exactly?

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Speaker 1: And you yes?

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Speaker 2: So it's like, what do you think surprise you the most.

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Speaker 1: About moving into this?

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Speaker 2: I just think coming a wife, fay.

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Speaker 1: I just think how much.

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Speaker 2: Weight people put on this title.

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Speaker 1: I think that's really like been a bit of a

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Speaker 1: like really was I nobody before?

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Speaker 2: I don't know how to explain it.

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Speaker 1: So it's like, geez, I'm I'm proud and I'm happy,

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Speaker 1: and of course I made this decision because I want you.

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Speaker 1: I love the person I'm with, but it's like I

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Speaker 1: have other things. I'm proud of you, just as you know.

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Speaker 1: But I think it's something that's really evident and it's

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Speaker 1: really visual too, so and you invite people into that,

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Speaker 1: whereas like in other areas of my life, maybe I'm

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Speaker 1: doing it more just for myself or in a smaller circle.

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Speaker 1: So that's been that's.

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Speaker 2: Been almost like an achievement. You made it girl.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and it's like, no, there's so many other things

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Speaker 1: I want to do, but yeah, yeah, that's definitely what

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Speaker 1: surprised you about motherhood.

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Speaker 2: I think the fact that was still very heavily like

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Speaker 2: centered on gender, Like I didn't know through my whole pregnancy.

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Speaker 2: My husband and I decided not to know the sex

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Speaker 2: of our baby, which was like a surprise for us.

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Speaker 2: It's something fun to keep us going getting what they

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Speaker 2: could be. But then when we found out it was

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Speaker 2: a boy, like when they came out of me and

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Speaker 2: the oh, it's a boy. And then the reception was

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Speaker 2: like I expect that if I had a girl. Seople

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Speaker 2: are happy for you, but there's a little catchy extra

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Speaker 2: because it's a yeah, first boy. You know, it's like wow, really,

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Speaker 2: in this year of twenty twenty two, we still care,

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Speaker 2: you know. And then obviously you get ants and what

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Speaker 2: we're very open about their opinions and literally say thank

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Speaker 2: you that it's a boy. You know, you do the

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Speaker 2: right thing. You know, like you're the.

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Speaker 1: One who went to manufacture child and you'd be like.

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Speaker 2: Okay, I want a boy here. I definitely think gen

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Speaker 2: Z and onwards would not care about boy girls. So

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Speaker 2: it's so funny how other like baby boomers and them

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Speaker 2: are so tired gender gender.

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Speaker 1: Carrying on the family name, doing us proud giving them

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Speaker 1: a boy exactly, It's like, oh, okay, and do you

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Speaker 1: know it's actually the man who determines the gender.

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Speaker 2: So I think that surprised me the most amount of

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Speaker 2: like relief. I thought people had that it was healthy

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Speaker 2: first of all, just everyone, but then the boy part

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Speaker 2: was like unexpected. Yeah I didn't expect that. I didn't

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Speaker 2: even know what I would feel like. But then I

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Speaker 2: think people are too happy. I'm like, what if it

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Speaker 2: had been a girl? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: Then what then?

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Speaker 2: What would you just be pretending just they healthy full stop? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: That's wild because I feel like I feel like too,

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Speaker 1: because I remember when Gabrielle Union had her baby, she

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Speaker 1: was like people.

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Speaker 2: Checking how dark?

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Speaker 1: How the girls start looking at like she pretty?

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Speaker 2: Yeah girl? And like that pressure from baby it's crazy, insane,

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Speaker 2: crazy crazy.

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Speaker 1: But Amanda, you gave birth a cute ass baby. I

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Speaker 1: will tell you, y'all, I'm in love with baby Jerome.

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Speaker 1: Like I just be looking sometimes I'm sat another photos.

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Speaker 2: I know they do do that.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, like I'm tired, but just so cute. And I

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Speaker 1: was like, maybe I'm biased. It's my baby. I think

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Speaker 1: he's like Nana, y'all really legit produced Maybe I'm because

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Speaker 1: I'm an ugly boy because the pressure pressure, the bar

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Speaker 1: has been set.

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Speaker 2: But yeah, what's disappointed you? So fat? Though? Like in

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Speaker 2: in getting a new role, in you know, becoming a wife.

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Speaker 2: What have you thought?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? I think what's disappointed me is like maybe a

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Speaker 1: lack of concern for me, you know what I mean,

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Speaker 1: Like and in terms of some key people in my life,

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Speaker 1: like oh.

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Speaker 2: The wedding, you must be ext.

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Speaker 1: The wedding houses or you know, more concern about everything

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Speaker 1: around it.

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Speaker 2: But it's like are you ready?

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Speaker 1: Do you know what I mean? Like, no one's really

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Speaker 1: asking me, like some you know, people would have expected

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Speaker 1: that not having that conversation or to be like are

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Speaker 1: you okay? Do you feel good about it? Is this

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Speaker 1: what I mean? I knew? I literally said this, like

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Speaker 1: we met with our pastor or and even just to

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Speaker 1: my mind now husband, I was like, this decision was

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Speaker 1: made long ago, like it's just the official like there

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Speaker 1: was no like I'm waiting for that moment at the

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Speaker 1: aisle to be like yes. So I was like, the

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Speaker 1: decision was made long time ago, of course, but I

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Speaker 1: just remember feeling. But do you can are people concerned

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Speaker 1: about mem if I feel like I'm ready or on

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Speaker 1: the headspace, maybe they trust me.

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Speaker 2: Do you think they're more concerned about Tom.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, And it's more like about the family. Don't embarrass

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Speaker 1: us to the family. You gotta like the relief about oh,

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Speaker 1: the wedding was so beautiful and nice, Like I was like,

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Speaker 1: what did you expect? Any But that's another conversation. But

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Speaker 1: it's kind of like, Okay, you've done well, Like it's

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Speaker 1: more like how you look optics. That's really what it's been.

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Speaker 1: And it's a weird thing. And if had I not

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Speaker 1: had those internal conversations with myself and with people that

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Speaker 1: I can open up to about like I'm happy with

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Speaker 1: making this decision, like this is something I want and

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Speaker 1: it's just my own internal processing of like this journey

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Speaker 1: for me yeah, I think I could have easily just

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Speaker 1: made this decision and just like like like you know

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Speaker 1: what I mean. So that was interesting for me to it.

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Speaker 2: It takes a big thing in African families like yeah,

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Speaker 2: it doesn't matter what's happening underneath, like go along with

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Speaker 2: it looks good, yes, even if it doesn't feel good. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: and for you, I think for me how closeted. As

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Speaker 2: much as people are open about motherhood, they also not Yeah,

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Speaker 2: and it's traumatic in some way, like you're literally giving

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Speaker 2: birth and then it's like expected just smile and be

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Speaker 2: happy and every good to babe. Everything is yeah, but

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Speaker 2: like there's so much to do, like physically your body

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Speaker 2: is going through the transformation, yeah, mentally spiritual release. I

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Speaker 2: think for me, I'm a bit disappointed that we're not

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Speaker 2: more vocal about it, or we're vocal when the time comes. Yes,

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Speaker 2: But I think a lot of these things you need

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Speaker 2: time to process. So it's like you're processing all these

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Speaker 2: things so quickly and then you're just being told all

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Speaker 2: these things. You're like, why don't you tell me before? Yes,

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Speaker 2: you know, like why again, we always talk about this,

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Speaker 2: like we feel like with marriage, with sex, with so

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Speaker 2: many things that women go through. We need to have

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Speaker 2: these conversations earlier. Yeah, and don't have it when I'm

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Speaker 2: about to.

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Speaker 1: Go and I feel like too. Then there's an expectation,

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Speaker 1: oh you should know, or like why don't you know?

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Speaker 1: It's hard just get on with it, like I don't

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Speaker 1: want to told Yeah exactly exactly.

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Speaker 2: It's so so true.

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Speaker 1: And I think that's why we even have this podcast,

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Speaker 1: because you know, people ask like, you know, why or what,

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Speaker 1: But it's to have these conversations because there's so many

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Speaker 1: things in my life. I was like, why don't anyone

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Speaker 1: tell me about this? Like why is it such a

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Speaker 1: you know? But it's really trying to open up this

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Speaker 1: this channel of communication and share.

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Speaker 2: Have you considered yeah, okay, yeah, there's so many things

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Speaker 2: I'm like, I don't know. Breastfeeding for examples, like not

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Speaker 2: as easy just putting a baby on your book, yes,

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Speaker 2: you know, and before you're pregnant. I think that's what

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Speaker 2: most of us think. Would you choose to breastfeed? Like yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 2: I will, of course I will. Then you realize how

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Speaker 2: big it is, like maybe I won't. How would that

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Speaker 2: look for me? Exactly? There's so many things to it

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Speaker 2: where it's like we need to have more deeper conversations

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Speaker 2: around it and around it. But hey, that's.

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Speaker 1: Why we're gonna have separate episodes for this to actually

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Speaker 1: because yeah yeah, and of course we will never exhaust it.

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Speaker 1: But I just think, let's just start.

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Speaker 2: But I'm talking, yeah, yeah, but what makes you happy

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Speaker 2: about this new face? I actually didn't think of that,

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Speaker 2: but we should be happy. Yeah, people will be like.

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Speaker 1: I think what makes me happy, Similar told us, saying,

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Speaker 1: like the decision was made long ago. It's just like

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Speaker 1: a knowing of partnership and knowing that you're gonna have

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Speaker 1: someone in your life to like help I do and

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Speaker 1: help you know, share in moments, enjoy, celebrate. I'm definitely

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Speaker 1: looking forward to that and building together. You know, I

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Speaker 1: never used to understand it as a single person what

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Speaker 1: partnership was fully, but there really is a building. Like

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Speaker 1: the person I was when I started dating him is

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Speaker 1: an the person I am, and the things you've been

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Speaker 1: able to accomplish over the course of the relationship, you

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Speaker 1: really see how ride or To can do so much

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Speaker 1: more than one. Like I said in the Bible, like, really,

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Speaker 1: I think I look forward to that. I look forward

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Speaker 1: to living and traveling and just sharing experiences. We are

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Speaker 1: both really like experience as people we both really care about,

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Speaker 1: you know, the people who matter, like family and friends,

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Speaker 1: So like enjoying and yeah, I just look forward to

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Speaker 1: like what life is going to bring past, like you know,

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Speaker 1: this sort of moment of which sometimes feels obligatory of

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Speaker 1: like oh you've now you have to have the wedding,

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Speaker 1: but like, yeah, just really building and what life brings

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Speaker 1: us and just like taking it all in, Like I

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Speaker 1: think that's what I look forward to. I think doing

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Speaker 1: life that's what I look forward to doing the most.

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Speaker 1: And for you, beautiful, I think for me, it's it

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Speaker 1: is raising someone, Like it's almost that you've got this pure,

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Speaker 1: little innocent person and to see what they will be,

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Speaker 1: like like which traits will we have of myselves?

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Speaker 2: With traits will we have of mine? Or his own?

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Speaker 2: Completely like just it's it's like you're shepherding someone and

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Speaker 2: guiding them and then wondering if is this going to

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Speaker 2: be the right thing? Am I doing the right? And

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Speaker 2: after you and me have talked about parenting and our

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Speaker 2: parents and all this and African parents, but now it's

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Speaker 2: our turn, right.

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Speaker 1: Can you do it right?

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Speaker 2: You're going to be as right as you can. How

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Speaker 2: some it's exciting, like what's going to happen, what's around

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Speaker 2: the corner? How is he going to be? Is he

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Speaker 2: going to be above chatty child or more quieter and introspected,

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Speaker 2: or is he going to be like all these things

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Speaker 2: and everything's beautiful right, but just to see discover all

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Speaker 2: those aspects of them. Yeah, I think it's just going

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Speaker 2: to be like he's discovered. Like they say, a son

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Speaker 2: is born or daughters born, but the mother is also born. Yes,

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Speaker 2: So I feel like, even for me, how am I

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Speaker 2: going to be as a person now that I'm a mother?

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Speaker 2: So fighting times ahead for sure, a lot of diaper changing.

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Speaker 1: But have you had a nappy blow blow?

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Speaker 2: The blowout? Oh god? Yeah? See another episode about this.

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Speaker 2: And I think we forget it's a blessing to be married,

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Speaker 2: for me to be it's a lot of people don't

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Speaker 2: get to experience or experience it very different. Yes, And

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Speaker 2: we've managed to.

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Speaker 1: Be fortunate where we are fortunate, and the thing is

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Speaker 1: right now in the decision I've made right now, I

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Speaker 1: feel so fortunate and so blessed and so grateful because

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Speaker 1: I also know what it was to not have that. Yeah, right, yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's another thing. Yeah, So what do you think the

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Speaker 1: expectations are that are being placed on you as a mother.

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Speaker 1: We kind of touched on a little bit or in

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Speaker 1: this new chapter because it also encompasses not just you

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Speaker 1: being a mother to Jerome, but there's also now a wife.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and like yeah family, like you what position? And

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Speaker 2: also yeah, I think to be able to do it all, yes,

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Speaker 2: Like I'm expected to be strong every aspect, like you know,

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Speaker 2: the child is growing up, well, your wife, your husband

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Speaker 2: or wife wherever you're with is happy. Yes, You're like

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Speaker 2: everything is like it has to be one hundred and

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Speaker 2: it's like that's not really impossible, but it's definitely expected

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Speaker 2: of me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, and I feel that already,

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Speaker 2: like everyone wants a piece of you, and then how

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Speaker 2: do you have enough for yourself? Like essentially it's like

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Speaker 2: you're holding a cake and people are taking this license

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Speaker 2: and you're like, ooh what about me? Yeah yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 2: And I feel like that's the biggest thing where it's

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Speaker 2: like people expect me to be in some ways, even

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Speaker 2: with friendships, people expect me to be exactly the same.

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Speaker 2: But it's like I can't I now have my time

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Speaker 2: is divided. And I said, like the cake analogy, like

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Speaker 2: someone's taking two slices, those are the one slices to

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Speaker 2: go to you.

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Speaker 1: But now I can't give a GISs.

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Speaker 2: So it's like that, like how do I navigate this

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Speaker 2: new space space? But it was expecting exactly the same

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Speaker 2: you can't.

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Speaker 1: I have to agree. I think it's like also you

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Speaker 1: know the weight of like okay, I'm not just thinking

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Speaker 1: about myself no more. And also I am someone who

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Speaker 1: wants to make the people I care about feel valued,

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Speaker 1: like I've spent time with them, and and it's hard

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Speaker 1: because you're like it shosed to be so easy.

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Speaker 2: I'll just like be like, oh, off I go.

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Speaker 1: And I'm so grateful and fortunate to have people in

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Speaker 1: my life who are understanding and caring and get it.

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Speaker 1: But even then something like no, but I also want to.

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Speaker 1: But it's like you think of the other person. And

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Speaker 1: now I think people have an expectation that I'll walk

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Speaker 1: around like do you mind I miss this? So and

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Speaker 1: so you better put some respect on my lime. It's

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Speaker 1: like just respect me for me man, And yeah, I

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00:20:00,600 --> 00:20:03,480
Speaker 1: get that, like the demand and I think even within

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Speaker 1: our friendship is evolving, And I mentioned to you it's

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Speaker 1: like having to find a way to make the friendship

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Speaker 1: work and then put time into.

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Speaker 2: It, because I think it's a lot of times we

401
00:20:15,080 --> 00:20:18,399
Speaker 2: could be wanting but Bumby's busy with happy I'm this baby.

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Speaker 2: They're like, oh, we last quart up two weeks ago,

403
00:20:20,960 --> 00:20:23,359
Speaker 2: were you know, like making sure that doesn't happen. Yeah,

404
00:20:23,480 --> 00:20:25,920
Speaker 2: and it happens easily exactly.

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Speaker 1: And it's suggesting and saying that maybe we can't have

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Speaker 1: our three four hour catchups. Yeah, maybe it'll be an

407
00:20:32,000 --> 00:20:34,880
Speaker 1: hour this time, but that's okay. Just making sure you're

408
00:20:34,960 --> 00:20:38,119
Speaker 1: checking in or like you know, Amanda when she's breastfeeding,

409
00:20:38,400 --> 00:20:40,679
Speaker 1: it's like she'll text and with time difference, you can

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00:20:40,760 --> 00:20:42,239
Speaker 1: have a bit of a text, you know what I mean.

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Speaker 1: So it's like, yeah, it's literally putting the work in. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: like it's a relationship, like putting time and effort into that.

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Speaker 2: This is this is just ours, but imagine yours with

414
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Speaker 2: everyone else. Yeah, exactly. Exactly do you think people's perceptions

415
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Speaker 2: of you have changed? Like when they look at you now,

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Speaker 2: I think.

417
00:21:02,080 --> 00:21:05,919
Speaker 1: They are like definitely people feel like now you are

418
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Speaker 1: somebody on marriage exactly, And now what you say has

419
00:21:13,320 --> 00:21:18,160
Speaker 1: wait to it, maybe a little more. And of course

420
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Speaker 1: there's a level of like you are almost with the

421
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Speaker 1: submission thing. It's like you almost like have no voice

422
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Speaker 1: in certain things. And now I belong to another fact,

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Speaker 1: like I've been handed over, like I'm from one to

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Speaker 1: the others. Like the individuality is kind of left out

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Speaker 1: and lost. And yeah, I think people think it's like

426
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Speaker 1: you've made it, and I'm like made what, Like this

427
00:21:44,280 --> 00:21:47,520
Speaker 1: is just part of the journey of life. And maybe

428
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Speaker 1: I'm a bit too like cynical. I don't know if

429
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Speaker 1: it's cynicism at all, but like I'm just like it's

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Speaker 1: just a nice It's an addition, a positive, great addition.

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Speaker 2: To my life.

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Speaker 1: But it's not my life. It's not a whole life, yeah,

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Speaker 1: you know, just like my work is not my life

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Speaker 1: or my you know what I mean. There's more to me,

435
00:22:06,960 --> 00:22:08,800
Speaker 1: you know, there's more to room be beyond. But I

436
00:22:08,880 --> 00:22:12,200
Speaker 1: think there's that, and I think there's a thing of

437
00:22:12,359 --> 00:22:14,800
Speaker 1: like I'm no longer myself and I'm like, no, I

438
00:22:14,880 --> 00:22:18,639
Speaker 1: want to still keep my random room binus with me,

439
00:22:18,760 --> 00:22:21,080
Speaker 1: which is what he fell in love with after all. Yeah, exactly,

440
00:22:21,160 --> 00:22:25,440
Speaker 1: I wouldn't be here, you know, not be new yeah eat, yeah.

441
00:22:25,520 --> 00:22:28,800
Speaker 2: I think for me definitely, there's that big jump from

442
00:22:29,280 --> 00:22:31,520
Speaker 2: you know, like from where you're at right now, like

443
00:22:31,680 --> 00:22:34,399
Speaker 2: being a wife. It's like, oh am I, It's like, oh,

444
00:22:34,480 --> 00:22:36,800
Speaker 2: now am I with a kid? Like then it's like

445
00:22:36,840 --> 00:22:40,600
Speaker 2: and in our culture again and that's like hugely valued.

446
00:22:41,359 --> 00:22:43,560
Speaker 2: And to me, I feel exactly like you. I mean,

447
00:22:43,560 --> 00:22:46,320
Speaker 2: it's me, yeah, yeah, of course I have this beautiful

448
00:22:46,400 --> 00:22:50,359
Speaker 2: baby boy, but it's not I don't know, it's like

449
00:22:50,440 --> 00:22:53,119
Speaker 2: I'm still me and that he's him and I'm me

450
00:22:53,359 --> 00:22:54,960
Speaker 2: and I have him with me, but it's not like

451
00:22:55,440 --> 00:22:57,920
Speaker 2: but I think people just think, oh, now your wives

452
00:22:57,960 --> 00:23:00,399
Speaker 2: are now you're and yeah, in some aspects, I'm an

453
00:23:00,480 --> 00:23:02,920
Speaker 2: expert on him, but I'm an expert on every single

454
00:23:03,200 --> 00:23:06,560
Speaker 2: thing aspect. And the respect level people give you, it's like, no,

455
00:23:06,760 --> 00:23:09,280
Speaker 2: you can respect me even with or without a child.

456
00:23:09,720 --> 00:23:12,720
Speaker 2: And I know for my single friends or friends without kids,

457
00:23:12,800 --> 00:23:15,399
Speaker 2: or friends who don't want to have kids, there's always

458
00:23:15,440 --> 00:23:18,840
Speaker 2: something they have to grapple with because literally I'd want

459
00:23:18,880 --> 00:23:22,200
Speaker 2: to deny it, but it's undeniable. There is a difference,

460
00:23:22,440 --> 00:23:27,000
Speaker 2: like people do treat you differently than an elevation like oh,

461
00:23:27,080 --> 00:23:29,000
Speaker 2: you know and even with Roomby's waiting. I remember there's

462
00:23:29,000 --> 00:23:33,760
Speaker 2: so many hints towards have kids, have kids. You know, man,

463
00:23:33,880 --> 00:23:36,159
Speaker 2: she's just made it like two minutes ago across the

464
00:23:36,240 --> 00:23:37,119
Speaker 2: altar and now I.

465
00:23:37,200 --> 00:23:41,200
Speaker 1: Was like, yeah, you know, you know, so it's like this, Yeah,

466
00:23:41,400 --> 00:23:42,080
Speaker 1: it's I.

467
00:23:42,160 --> 00:23:46,800
Speaker 2: Think that, And that also probably could be something disappointing too, because.

468
00:23:46,560 --> 00:23:49,360
Speaker 1: You don't know my journey. Yeah, if I even want

469
00:23:49,440 --> 00:23:51,880
Speaker 1: kids number one, most don't even know. They just exactly

470
00:23:52,160 --> 00:23:54,880
Speaker 1: number two. You don't know what it's going to take.

471
00:23:55,040 --> 00:23:57,200
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, And I mean people have said to me.

472
00:23:57,240 --> 00:23:58,840
Speaker 2: I've said, oh no, I think I'm one and I

473
00:23:58,920 --> 00:24:00,840
Speaker 2: want to have one, and they're like, I read a

474
00:24:00,880 --> 00:24:02,240
Speaker 2: few people's how could you?

475
00:24:02,880 --> 00:24:03,520
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh.

476
00:24:03,640 --> 00:24:05,439
Speaker 2: So it's like again you're perceived you.

477
00:24:05,520 --> 00:24:06,879
Speaker 1: Have to do this and do that, and it's just

478
00:24:07,000 --> 00:24:10,360
Speaker 1: like so basically, you just have to learn to run

479
00:24:10,440 --> 00:24:14,600
Speaker 1: your own race because ultimately they will You will never

480
00:24:14,680 --> 00:24:18,520
Speaker 1: satisfy everybody, and you'll go crazy trying to satisfy everybody.

481
00:24:18,640 --> 00:24:22,280
Speaker 1: That's thousand percent. It's so hard though, it's so hard,

482
00:24:22,560 --> 00:24:25,520
Speaker 1: but it's really I think that's what I'd say. Who

483
00:24:25,680 --> 00:24:26,480
Speaker 1: is Amanda? Now?

484
00:24:26,800 --> 00:24:31,560
Speaker 2: No, how would you describe yourself I'm still in discovery mode. Yeah,

485
00:24:32,160 --> 00:24:34,400
Speaker 2: I think because Bubba is so young as well, it's

486
00:24:34,600 --> 00:24:37,960
Speaker 2: like still new. Yeah, he's a newborn and I'm a

487
00:24:38,040 --> 00:24:41,480
Speaker 2: new mother, so we're still figuring each other out. He's

488
00:24:41,480 --> 00:24:44,200
Speaker 2: still figuring himself out in this world. I'm still figuring

489
00:24:44,240 --> 00:24:47,359
Speaker 2: how he fits in into this world. And I think

490
00:24:47,400 --> 00:24:51,760
Speaker 2: Amanda now is in discovery evolving mode like I'm not.

491
00:24:52,480 --> 00:24:55,439
Speaker 2: I can feel life changing and I'm trying to figure

492
00:24:55,440 --> 00:24:58,199
Speaker 2: it out in the midst of all that. But at

493
00:24:58,240 --> 00:25:00,280
Speaker 2: the same time, I'm still wanting to keep on like

494
00:25:00,440 --> 00:25:03,600
Speaker 2: being me but maybe evolving me.

495
00:25:03,760 --> 00:25:04,119
Speaker 1: I don't know.

496
00:25:04,320 --> 00:25:06,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm still in the think of it, so it's

497
00:25:06,960 --> 00:25:10,720
Speaker 2: really hard to give a definitive answer. Yeah, but definitely

498
00:25:12,200 --> 00:25:15,480
Speaker 2: it's exciting in some ways and very scary and absolutely

499
00:25:15,720 --> 00:25:17,760
Speaker 2: I'm having to let go of some things that I'm like,

500
00:25:18,080 --> 00:25:20,399
Speaker 2: okay that was before, Like right now, I can't scroll

501
00:25:20,520 --> 00:25:25,280
Speaker 2: mindlessly on Instagram forever because I have things to do. Yeah, literally,

502
00:25:25,640 --> 00:25:30,359
Speaker 2: I have to take care of someone literally, So it's like, yeah,

503
00:25:30,480 --> 00:25:32,760
Speaker 2: Amanda now is still watch.

504
00:25:32,600 --> 00:25:37,040
Speaker 1: This exact and also giving up like work, right yeah,

505
00:25:37,520 --> 00:25:41,440
Speaker 1: or you know, a different type of work, yes, and yeah,

506
00:25:41,640 --> 00:25:44,240
Speaker 1: yeah absolutely, but I'm so proud of you, like just

507
00:25:44,359 --> 00:25:47,800
Speaker 1: to say as an aside, like Amanda coming here was

508
00:25:47,920 --> 00:25:51,080
Speaker 1: no easy decision at all, and it's a huge something.

509
00:25:51,280 --> 00:25:53,440
Speaker 1: I feel so grateful and blessed that you were able

510
00:25:53,520 --> 00:25:58,080
Speaker 1: to do. And it was really hard to explain to people,

511
00:25:58,200 --> 00:26:00,280
Speaker 1: like why is she coming? Yeah?

512
00:26:00,400 --> 00:26:01,520
Speaker 2: When so young?

513
00:26:02,240 --> 00:26:05,720
Speaker 1: So young? Yeah, you know. So I'm so happy you

514
00:26:05,880 --> 00:26:09,159
Speaker 1: could obviously make it, like obviously understood if she couldn't

515
00:26:09,200 --> 00:26:11,680
Speaker 1: make it, you know. But I think it was a

516
00:26:11,760 --> 00:26:15,160
Speaker 1: bit of that kind of having that amandedness, like taking

517
00:26:15,240 --> 00:26:16,280
Speaker 1: care of Amanda too.

518
00:26:16,520 --> 00:26:20,520
Speaker 2: And I don't think we're told now. And I'm grateful

519
00:26:20,560 --> 00:26:23,080
Speaker 2: that I actually have the opportunity to come because then

520
00:26:23,520 --> 00:26:25,960
Speaker 2: it's like I needed a rest, Yes, I needed to

521
00:26:26,040 --> 00:26:29,560
Speaker 2: reconnect with myself, Yes, I needed I needed also like

522
00:26:30,080 --> 00:26:32,399
Speaker 2: I'm lucky enough that I have a very involved partner,

523
00:26:32,720 --> 00:26:35,119
Speaker 2: both husbands, so I could leave them with someone, you

524
00:26:35,200 --> 00:26:37,520
Speaker 2: know what I mean. So it's like, and you wonder

525
00:26:37,600 --> 00:26:40,200
Speaker 2: for single parents, how do they how do you carve

526
00:26:40,280 --> 00:26:42,520
Speaker 2: out time for the song? I mean when I came up,

527
00:26:42,560 --> 00:26:44,600
Speaker 2: like Umby and I were laughing because we're like, you know,

528
00:26:44,720 --> 00:26:47,480
Speaker 2: we're not at that nightclub being faith like we get

529
00:26:47,600 --> 00:26:49,600
Speaker 2: to a New City. You want to go out now,

530
00:26:50,240 --> 00:26:52,720
Speaker 2: I want to sleep, Yeah, but literally I want to

531
00:26:53,040 --> 00:26:55,359
Speaker 2: have maybe a massage and a little bit like a

532
00:26:55,440 --> 00:26:58,680
Speaker 2: glass of wine. And so it's like even that to evolve.

533
00:26:59,240 --> 00:27:02,719
Speaker 2: So it's been thank you for giving me the ultimate

534
00:27:02,800 --> 00:27:04,919
Speaker 2: excuse also have some res.

535
00:27:05,160 --> 00:27:08,040
Speaker 1: And thank you to myself for like you know also,

536
00:27:08,760 --> 00:27:10,880
Speaker 1: And that's the thing. It's like it's like that balance

537
00:27:10,960 --> 00:27:13,240
Speaker 1: of like give and take and being willing to give

538
00:27:13,400 --> 00:27:16,840
Speaker 1: so that you could take, you know so definitely, and

539
00:27:17,160 --> 00:27:20,200
Speaker 1: thank you to to forgiving this to me, Like that's

540
00:27:20,200 --> 00:27:22,399
Speaker 1: the greatest gift I could have asked for on my

541
00:27:22,480 --> 00:27:25,200
Speaker 1: wedding days to have like you know, you by myself.

542
00:27:25,359 --> 00:27:28,360
Speaker 1: Because that's the thing too, is like people don't understand

543
00:27:28,400 --> 00:27:31,480
Speaker 1: the emotional support you need. Like it's so much about

544
00:27:31,520 --> 00:27:35,040
Speaker 1: the other things, but like when you're just you getting ready,

545
00:27:35,160 --> 00:27:38,200
Speaker 1: especially I think getting ready for my day, when we're

546
00:27:38,280 --> 00:27:40,840
Speaker 1: just the three of us with my sister and you

547
00:27:41,440 --> 00:27:45,440
Speaker 1: really felt like okay, yeah, it's it's these are the

548
00:27:45,480 --> 00:27:47,639
Speaker 1: things people don't see. It's like that needing that support

549
00:27:47,680 --> 00:27:49,679
Speaker 1: of like it's okay, okay, let's put.

550
00:27:49,560 --> 00:27:51,879
Speaker 2: This on you, let's help take you up, let's you

551
00:27:51,960 --> 00:27:54,880
Speaker 2: know this and the energy, yes, and because it could

552
00:27:54,920 --> 00:28:00,440
Speaker 2: be like like just your children enjoy the moment exactly, Yeah,

553
00:28:00,440 --> 00:28:02,879
Speaker 2: and people to remind you to enjoy the moment exactly.

554
00:28:03,480 --> 00:28:06,760
Speaker 2: What do you think Rumby is now? I think Rumby is.

555
00:28:08,400 --> 00:28:13,480
Speaker 1: Definitely discovering being a wife in the way that serves

556
00:28:13,920 --> 00:28:18,440
Speaker 1: myself and my husband and our family. And also Rumby

557
00:28:18,600 --> 00:28:22,840
Speaker 1: is still exploring what she wants to be and do,

558
00:28:23,160 --> 00:28:25,439
Speaker 1: like I don't want it to stop. Like, yeah, one

559
00:28:25,480 --> 00:28:27,440
Speaker 1: of the things one of my greatest fears is to

560
00:28:27,480 --> 00:28:32,080
Speaker 1: feel like I'm stagnant and I lose myself completely. So

561
00:28:33,080 --> 00:28:35,280
Speaker 1: and I spoke to Amanda about this, like leading up

562
00:28:35,320 --> 00:28:37,680
Speaker 1: to Rora and leading up to this wedding, I found

563
00:28:37,720 --> 00:28:40,560
Speaker 1: myself doing a course on this, so trying to because

564
00:28:40,560 --> 00:28:44,000
Speaker 1: I felt like a deep need to keep like feeding myself.

565
00:28:44,320 --> 00:28:47,600
Speaker 1: I was reading avidly, like as an escape, like just

566
00:28:48,080 --> 00:28:50,600
Speaker 1: because I feel I need that for myself. Those are

567
00:28:50,680 --> 00:28:53,040
Speaker 1: things that feel and feed me, and I hope I

568
00:28:53,160 --> 00:28:56,720
Speaker 1: never stop feeding that those aspects of myself. Of course,

569
00:28:57,040 --> 00:29:00,560
Speaker 1: there's more time now to put into this really relationship

570
00:29:00,720 --> 00:29:04,480
Speaker 1: and working on it, of course, but yeah, it really

571
00:29:04,560 --> 00:29:11,160
Speaker 1: is discovery, Like y'all, I just started so tell I'm

572
00:29:11,280 --> 00:29:13,240
Speaker 1: just someone will be like, hey, hey, yes, you want

573
00:29:13,280 --> 00:29:16,440
Speaker 1: to discover and then meanwhile, you know, but yeah, it's

574
00:29:16,520 --> 00:29:20,520
Speaker 1: definitely still trying to but also still want to maintain,

575
00:29:20,760 --> 00:29:21,600
Speaker 1: like my meanness.

576
00:29:22,120 --> 00:29:24,560
Speaker 2: Do you think that's your biggest fear of this new era,

577
00:29:25,160 --> 00:29:25,960
Speaker 2: to not maintain.

578
00:29:26,120 --> 00:29:28,440
Speaker 1: I'm very scared of that. And I think I'm scared

579
00:29:28,480 --> 00:29:31,320
Speaker 1: even when I think of, you know, having a child

580
00:29:31,480 --> 00:29:35,040
Speaker 1: like I really have. And also you still want the

581
00:29:35,120 --> 00:29:38,000
Speaker 1: personal growth, you want to heal parts of yourself you

582
00:29:38,080 --> 00:29:42,120
Speaker 1: want to you know. And my sister Sonya was like,

583
00:29:42,960 --> 00:29:46,120
Speaker 1: you know, it's okay to discover some of these things

584
00:29:46,160 --> 00:29:49,440
Speaker 1: within the context of marriage or eventually within the context

585
00:29:49,480 --> 00:29:50,240
Speaker 1: of being a parent.

586
00:29:50,280 --> 00:29:51,200
Speaker 2: I have it all figured out.

587
00:29:51,200 --> 00:29:52,560
Speaker 1: You don't have to have it. I think I have

588
00:29:52,640 --> 00:29:54,760
Speaker 1: a great fear because like we're trying to, as a

589
00:29:54,880 --> 00:29:56,840
Speaker 1: Manda said, we're trying to do it differently and like

590
00:29:57,760 --> 00:30:00,640
Speaker 1: and so it's hard sometimes because then you feel like, oh, no,

591
00:30:00,720 --> 00:30:02,320
Speaker 1: I need to have it all my depths in a row.

592
00:30:02,480 --> 00:30:05,680
Speaker 1: But it's like you'll inevitably never be fully ready. And

593
00:30:05,800 --> 00:30:08,720
Speaker 1: when you're doing something differently, you also have to make

594
00:30:08,840 --> 00:30:11,720
Speaker 1: up like people will nay say it because you're doing

595
00:30:11,760 --> 00:30:14,320
Speaker 1: something different automatically people question it.

596
00:30:14,520 --> 00:30:15,600
Speaker 2: Because it's not normal.

597
00:30:15,800 --> 00:30:16,040
Speaker 1: Yeah.

598
00:30:16,320 --> 00:30:18,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, so it's pretty hard. And I know my greatest

599
00:30:18,800 --> 00:30:21,840
Speaker 2: fear is making sure my child is well rounded. Ye,

600
00:30:22,440 --> 00:30:25,680
Speaker 2: not putting my trauma on m just what we've learned.

601
00:30:25,720 --> 00:30:28,240
Speaker 2: It's been said, we're trying to do things differently. You know,

602
00:30:28,280 --> 00:30:30,560
Speaker 2: our parents are as great job as they could as well,

603
00:30:30,640 --> 00:30:32,760
Speaker 2: but there's some aspects where you're like, you know, hashtag

604
00:30:32,800 --> 00:30:35,880
Speaker 2: African parents because there's some stuff they've pushed on us

605
00:30:36,000 --> 00:30:40,040
Speaker 2: that they feared or they love that's not necessarily healthy.

606
00:30:40,720 --> 00:30:43,240
Speaker 2: So it's also like that's to serve and also just like, okay,

607
00:30:43,320 --> 00:30:45,480
Speaker 2: so how have I learned from that? Because I would

608
00:30:45,520 --> 00:30:49,400
Speaker 2: hope with us as Africans, as black girls, as Zimbabweans

609
00:30:49,800 --> 00:30:53,680
Speaker 2: that each generation we're evolving or elevating or elevating. So

610
00:30:53,840 --> 00:30:55,800
Speaker 2: how am I gonna help help?

611
00:30:55,920 --> 00:30:57,680
Speaker 1: But also not put too much pressure on here?

612
00:30:57,800 --> 00:30:58,240
Speaker 2: Exactly?

613
00:30:58,840 --> 00:31:01,640
Speaker 1: So because him, yes, so exactly.

614
00:31:01,800 --> 00:31:04,440
Speaker 2: Nobody's perfect. Nobody's perfect for sure.

615
00:31:04,960 --> 00:31:07,560
Speaker 1: I think we're both entering eras. You know, a man

616
00:31:07,640 --> 00:31:10,680
Speaker 1: and I are like real planners, like we like things

617
00:31:10,720 --> 00:31:13,480
Speaker 1: a certain way, and we're entering eras of like letting

618
00:31:13,560 --> 00:31:13,920
Speaker 1: go more.

619
00:31:13,920 --> 00:31:14,920
Speaker 2: And it's a weird thing.

620
00:31:15,840 --> 00:31:16,480
Speaker 1: What does that mean?

621
00:31:16,720 --> 00:31:17,280
Speaker 2: Let it flow?

622
00:31:18,720 --> 00:31:21,760
Speaker 1: I want to know. I want to know, yes, exactly.

623
00:31:22,000 --> 00:31:27,280
Speaker 1: So definitely challenging in that way for sure. And so

624
00:31:28,280 --> 00:31:31,160
Speaker 1: I guess in light of that, how do you feel

625
00:31:31,200 --> 00:31:32,400
Speaker 1: like you're going to try and maintain the.

626
00:31:32,520 --> 00:31:36,320
Speaker 2: Spirit of being you or discovering your new you. We

627
00:31:36,440 --> 00:31:41,640
Speaker 2: definitely trips like this helped. Seeing you carving out some

628
00:31:41,840 --> 00:31:45,800
Speaker 2: time for me definitely, I think will help me. Letting

629
00:31:45,840 --> 00:31:49,480
Speaker 2: my husband corve out some time for him, definitely helping

630
00:31:49,560 --> 00:31:52,520
Speaker 2: him ask the two of us, ask the three of us.

631
00:31:53,360 --> 00:31:57,920
Speaker 2: I think being conscious of that, yeah, like even if

632
00:31:57,960 --> 00:32:01,040
Speaker 2: it means a schedule, like I think about last night

633
00:32:01,120 --> 00:32:03,840
Speaker 2: and I need to really be like, okay, date night.

634
00:32:04,040 --> 00:32:07,680
Speaker 2: Is that once a week? You know? Do we go

635
00:32:07,800 --> 00:32:09,760
Speaker 2: out you know as a family once a week or

636
00:32:09,800 --> 00:32:12,000
Speaker 2: twice a week, like, you know, like really thinking of

637
00:32:12,960 --> 00:32:14,960
Speaker 2: set things, And I know, yeah, might feel like our

638
00:32:14,960 --> 00:32:17,240
Speaker 2: schedule boring, but I think if we do the opposite,

639
00:32:17,280 --> 00:32:19,840
Speaker 2: we just let it flow, which is inductive, Yeah, to

640
00:32:19,920 --> 00:32:23,360
Speaker 2: the mundaness, the routineness of life. So I need to

641
00:32:23,440 --> 00:32:25,400
Speaker 2: be conscious about like maybe every six months, do we

642
00:32:25,480 --> 00:32:27,600
Speaker 2: go away for a weekend? Do we you know, like

643
00:32:27,800 --> 00:32:30,240
Speaker 2: just have set things where it's like we do that,

644
00:32:30,520 --> 00:32:33,520
Speaker 2: we just always do do and I think in doing so,

645
00:32:33,680 --> 00:32:37,360
Speaker 2: we can reconnect like to myself, to me as a wife,

646
00:32:37,440 --> 00:32:41,360
Speaker 2: to me as a mother. That's so beautiful. Yeah, definitely,

647
00:32:41,480 --> 00:32:42,440
Speaker 2: I think that's the only way.

648
00:32:42,800 --> 00:32:46,120
Speaker 1: Even how we schedule, Like the podcast recording is so

649
00:32:46,280 --> 00:32:48,760
Speaker 1: great because it's like it's like a meeting. It's like, yeah,

650
00:32:48,880 --> 00:32:49,600
Speaker 1: here's something.

651
00:32:49,400 --> 00:32:52,680
Speaker 2: You look forward to. Yeah, so that's really I like that.

652
00:32:53,200 --> 00:32:57,720
Speaker 1: I think. Yeah. For me, I think I'm doing a course,

653
00:32:57,760 --> 00:33:01,720
Speaker 1: so I've finished that course hopefully and carving out time.

654
00:33:01,800 --> 00:33:04,760
Speaker 1: I just finished reading Atomic Habits and it was talking

655
00:33:04,800 --> 00:33:09,200
Speaker 1: about like in small doses, like you incrementally. I'm not

656
00:33:09,400 --> 00:33:13,080
Speaker 1: good at taking care of myself sometimes, Amanda knows, and

657
00:33:13,160 --> 00:33:15,840
Speaker 1: my sister was on my ass about that, but like

658
00:33:16,080 --> 00:33:20,520
Speaker 1: making sure like I've started a new system where I

659
00:33:20,600 --> 00:33:23,600
Speaker 1: have to record when I make time for myself, which

660
00:33:23,680 --> 00:33:27,680
Speaker 1: is weird because I'm like, what do you mean so actively?

661
00:33:27,760 --> 00:33:31,400
Speaker 1: Like I literally actively need to be that person to

662
00:33:31,560 --> 00:33:34,760
Speaker 1: switch off and to not put so much demand on

663
00:33:34,880 --> 00:33:37,040
Speaker 1: myself for others, but also be like there's only so

664
00:33:37,160 --> 00:33:39,160
Speaker 1: much I can do for others, And I think that's

665
00:33:39,240 --> 00:33:41,640
Speaker 1: going to help me find things that interest me and

666
00:33:41,680 --> 00:33:45,120
Speaker 1: actually actively do that and then similarly date nights like

667
00:33:45,480 --> 00:33:48,000
Speaker 1: with my partner, like be like, Okay, this is what

668
00:33:48,080 --> 00:33:51,400
Speaker 1: we're doing today in present moments, phones away. You know,

669
00:33:51,960 --> 00:33:55,120
Speaker 1: we're just you know, tapping into this and you know

670
00:33:55,280 --> 00:33:57,920
Speaker 1: things like that, which is hard, especially when it's work

671
00:33:58,000 --> 00:33:58,440
Speaker 1: you're doing this.

672
00:33:58,880 --> 00:34:02,720
Speaker 2: But yeah, I agree, and I would have to say, like,

673
00:34:02,960 --> 00:34:05,000
Speaker 2: you have to be conscious about it. You can't just

674
00:34:05,120 --> 00:34:07,520
Speaker 2: think it's going to happen. And I mean our viewers

675
00:34:07,920 --> 00:34:10,840
Speaker 2: or listeners can definitely let us know if they have

676
00:34:11,040 --> 00:34:14,520
Speaker 2: secrets to how to navigate all this new stuff. But

677
00:34:15,080 --> 00:34:18,040
Speaker 2: I think that always comes back to make time, to

678
00:34:18,560 --> 00:34:21,040
Speaker 2: make sure to do so because yeah, it's a lot,

679
00:34:21,120 --> 00:34:21,799
Speaker 2: you're dealing with.

680
00:34:21,880 --> 00:34:26,200
Speaker 1: A lot, Yeah for sure, But no, I think before

681
00:34:26,320 --> 00:34:28,040
Speaker 1: we wrap it up, I can't be.

682
00:34:28,120 --> 00:34:30,560
Speaker 2: Wrapping it up. Oh I means I'm also leaving.

683
00:34:31,440 --> 00:34:34,280
Speaker 1: She's literally yah, this's how much we love y'all. Remember

684
00:34:34,360 --> 00:34:37,600
Speaker 1: last time, literally just before we were recording, Matt is

685
00:34:37,640 --> 00:34:40,480
Speaker 1: literally flying out this afternoon and we had to crack

686
00:34:40,600 --> 00:34:45,480
Speaker 1: these mics. So what can viewers look forward to you

687
00:34:45,719 --> 00:34:46,640
Speaker 1: in this new season?

688
00:34:46,920 --> 00:34:52,919
Speaker 2: Oh, Mount, I think Wimby and I are always trying

689
00:34:52,960 --> 00:34:56,399
Speaker 2: to fall do new things, so you can expect new things.

690
00:34:56,440 --> 00:34:59,160
Speaker 2: I mean, you want to talk about more topics that

691
00:34:59,320 --> 00:35:01,880
Speaker 2: we know that you guys want to hear and that

692
00:35:02,000 --> 00:35:04,799
Speaker 2: we can delve into this so much. But I think

693
00:35:04,960 --> 00:35:10,560
Speaker 2: in elevation, yeah, and Levelope evolved, so we're going to change.

694
00:35:10,800 --> 00:35:11,960
Speaker 2: So it's been bad.

695
00:35:12,160 --> 00:35:15,759
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I agree, and I think still bringing us,

696
00:35:16,560 --> 00:35:18,200
Speaker 1: but I knew us. Like I'm sure if you listen

697
00:35:18,239 --> 00:35:20,840
Speaker 1: to season one and now season four, we'll be.

698
00:35:20,920 --> 00:35:22,200
Speaker 2: Like who these people are?

699
00:35:22,719 --> 00:35:24,839
Speaker 1: You know, I actually need to go back and listen

700
00:35:24,880 --> 00:35:28,200
Speaker 1: to episodes just be like, I know what about you know?

701
00:35:29,160 --> 00:35:31,839
Speaker 2: Yeah, the world is changing in our own little world

702
00:35:32,040 --> 00:35:34,800
Speaker 2: and the global world we're changing.

703
00:35:34,920 --> 00:35:37,080
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah, and I hope it's going to be

704
00:35:37,160 --> 00:35:40,440
Speaker 1: more things that you enjoy and to connect more with you.

705
00:35:40,840 --> 00:35:45,040
Speaker 1: And yeah, I'm so grateful for this platform. As we've

706
00:35:45,080 --> 00:35:47,480
Speaker 1: said before, we literally just started it, like you know,

707
00:35:47,719 --> 00:35:49,600
Speaker 1: and the fact that people still want to hear what

708
00:35:49,680 --> 00:35:54,360
Speaker 1: we have to say, it's it's amazing and we hope

709
00:35:54,560 --> 00:35:59,680
Speaker 1: like it benefits you. And yeah, so we back, like

710
00:36:00,400 --> 00:36:02,520
Speaker 1: stay tuned, stay.

711
00:36:02,400 --> 00:36:03,120
Speaker 2: Tuned for more.

712
00:36:03,680 --> 00:36:05,400
Speaker 1: Thank you so much, Thank you.

713
00:36:05,480 --> 00:36:08,360
Speaker 2: For being This will be the last time for a

714
00:36:08,400 --> 00:36:12,760
Speaker 2: little bit. Thanks together, together, but you're definitely hear us together.

715
00:36:12,880 --> 00:36:16,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, we've definitely been spoiled you come here, you know,

716
00:36:17,080 --> 00:36:19,279
Speaker 1: like we were denied for long time. We made up

717
00:36:19,320 --> 00:36:20,560
Speaker 1: for it. We made up for it.

718
00:36:20,920 --> 00:36:21,920
Speaker 2: So so grateful.

719
00:36:22,400 --> 00:36:25,160
Speaker 1: Thank you everybody for listening as always. Hit us up

720
00:36:25,239 --> 00:36:27,360
Speaker 1: on our socials Instagram.

721
00:36:27,760 --> 00:36:28,320
Speaker 2: It's layered.

722
00:36:28,840 --> 00:36:31,440
Speaker 1: We are on Twitter. We can have chats about topics

723
00:36:31,560 --> 00:36:34,319
Speaker 1: or whatever you want to share. It's on Twitter. We're

724
00:36:34,520 --> 00:36:38,040
Speaker 1: at its layered Pod. You can email us. It's layered

725
00:36:38,160 --> 00:36:42,640
Speaker 1: Pod at gmail dot com. And yeah, please feel free

726
00:36:42,760 --> 00:36:44,680
Speaker 1: to d m U slide and the DMS and our

727
00:36:44,840 --> 00:36:48,279
Speaker 1: voice notes. Maybe we'll play a few and answer some

728
00:36:48,480 --> 00:36:51,640
Speaker 1: questions on here. But yeah, thank you so so much

729
00:36:51,840 --> 00:36:54,719
Speaker 1: and we will catch you soon. Happy to be back.

730
00:36:56,440 --> 00:36:59,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, oh no, no,