1 00:00:00,640 --> 00:00:03,840 Speaker 1: This is a Will and Woody podcast mini. Right now, 2 00:00:03,960 --> 00:00:05,960 Speaker 1: do you think you can tell us a story that 3 00:00:06,080 --> 00:00:09,639 Speaker 1: keeps us entertained for two minutes? You win two thousand bucks. 4 00:00:09,760 --> 00:00:12,520 Speaker 1: Winter is the time for smooth, satisfying flavor. 5 00:00:12,880 --> 00:00:14,480 Speaker 2: Winter is skinner season. 6 00:00:14,920 --> 00:00:15,880 Speaker 3: Drink responsibly. 7 00:00:19,680 --> 00:00:23,040 Speaker 1: Well thanks to Guinness. Well, let's crack in. We've got 8 00:00:23,040 --> 00:00:26,320 Speaker 1: a bunch of people who want another chance at the cash. 9 00:00:26,160 --> 00:00:29,360 Speaker 2: Two thousand bucks if you can keep us entertained for 10 00:00:29,440 --> 00:00:31,800 Speaker 2: two minutes. Two minutes is a long time, and that's 11 00:00:32,000 --> 00:00:34,640 Speaker 2: how long it takes to settle Aguinness, my friend. I mean, 12 00:00:34,680 --> 00:00:35,559 Speaker 2: that's why we're doing it. 13 00:00:35,680 --> 00:00:37,199 Speaker 1: Yes, that's a good point, Theresa. 14 00:00:37,280 --> 00:00:39,080 Speaker 2: You know the drill, mate. We're gonna have a timer 15 00:00:39,120 --> 00:00:41,760 Speaker 2: that starts you'll hear you'll hear a bell at a minute, 16 00:00:41,920 --> 00:00:43,760 Speaker 2: But you need to keep us entertained for two to 17 00:00:43,840 --> 00:00:46,559 Speaker 2: win the two grand time starts now. Yeh Hi. 18 00:00:47,159 --> 00:00:51,600 Speaker 3: When I was seventeen, I had my firstborn baby, who 19 00:00:51,720 --> 00:00:55,560 Speaker 3: was nine weeks premature. I remember waiting not one night, 20 00:00:55,760 --> 00:00:58,040 Speaker 3: and it was earlier hours of the morning. 21 00:00:58,080 --> 00:01:01,240 Speaker 1: I was half asleep and when I switched a light on, 22 00:01:01,360 --> 00:01:05,280 Speaker 1: I've seen a big black spider, which startled me. I 23 00:01:05,319 --> 00:01:08,840 Speaker 1: thought I grubbed the towel and Theresa, I actually hate 24 00:01:08,880 --> 00:01:12,520 Speaker 1: spiders there. They make me far too scared. I'm not 25 00:01:12,560 --> 00:01:18,160 Speaker 1: seeking around for that story is yeah. 26 00:01:16,560 --> 00:01:20,920 Speaker 2: Yeah, Matthew, you know the drill in two minutes starts now. 27 00:01:21,959 --> 00:01:25,560 Speaker 3: Yeah. I was at Lake Conjol on Christmas Eve with 28 00:01:25,560 --> 00:01:28,920 Speaker 3: my family for Christmas, who were down by the river 29 00:01:29,040 --> 00:01:31,280 Speaker 3: having a barbecue dinner. So we set up the camp 30 00:01:31,280 --> 00:01:33,440 Speaker 3: and the girls that asked could they go down to 31 00:01:33,480 --> 00:01:35,640 Speaker 3: the lake and have a look at the lake while 32 00:01:35,640 --> 00:01:38,040 Speaker 3: they're eating their sausage sandwich and I said, we said, yeah, sure, 33 00:01:38,080 --> 00:01:40,320 Speaker 3: off you go, and about two minutes slowly hit his 34 00:01:40,440 --> 00:01:43,679 Speaker 3: massive scream myfe and I said, that sounds like the girl. 35 00:01:43,840 --> 00:01:47,760 Speaker 3: So I bolted towards the lake, thinking, oh no, what's 36 00:01:47,760 --> 00:01:50,280 Speaker 3: happened to the girls. Something's happened. And as I come 37 00:01:50,280 --> 00:01:54,040 Speaker 3: into the clearing, there was this massive kangaroo standing in 38 00:01:54,080 --> 00:01:57,480 Speaker 3: front of him on its back legs, growling and hissing 39 00:01:57,520 --> 00:01:59,840 Speaker 3: and look trying to scratch them. I said, the girls, 40 00:02:00,280 --> 00:02:02,560 Speaker 3: don't move whatever you do, and the little one my 41 00:02:02,680 --> 00:02:07,000 Speaker 3: merely threw the sausy sandwich at the kangaroo and I 42 00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:08,280 Speaker 3: thought it was a good move, but it ate that 43 00:02:08,360 --> 00:02:10,280 Speaker 3: quickly while it was eating it. I pushed the girls 44 00:02:10,320 --> 00:02:13,760 Speaker 3: behind me, and then the kangaroo grabbed me in a headlock. Oh, 45 00:02:14,919 --> 00:02:17,000 Speaker 3: and I couldn't couldn't get free, and it was scratching 46 00:02:17,000 --> 00:02:19,959 Speaker 3: at the back of my neck, biting at my ear, 47 00:02:21,760 --> 00:02:24,360 Speaker 3: and then it kicked me and I felt two ribs break. 48 00:02:24,440 --> 00:02:27,000 Speaker 3: I just felt the crack, and then all of a 49 00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:31,600 Speaker 3: sudden it lunged again. So I punched it, and it's 50 00:02:31,639 --> 00:02:33,680 Speaker 3: sort of break loose and let go a bit, and 51 00:02:33,680 --> 00:02:35,359 Speaker 3: the girls are absolutely screaming. 52 00:02:36,600 --> 00:02:39,640 Speaker 2: Where did you punch the kangaroo in the face? 53 00:02:43,280 --> 00:02:45,959 Speaker 3: And like the cups of the tin which which was 54 00:02:46,000 --> 00:02:48,240 Speaker 3: about to make it let me go. And as I 55 00:02:48,280 --> 00:02:52,400 Speaker 3: pushed away, the kids are screaming and it's growling, and 56 00:02:52,440 --> 00:02:56,400 Speaker 3: I'm stepping backwards slowly. I said to the kid's boom, 57 00:02:56,520 --> 00:02:58,600 Speaker 3: run to the house, Run as quick as you can 58 00:02:58,639 --> 00:03:02,480 Speaker 3: to the cow. I couldn't work out why they were screaming. 59 00:03:02,560 --> 00:03:04,640 Speaker 3: It was taller than me, It was probably lily seven 60 00:03:04,680 --> 00:03:08,880 Speaker 3: foot tall, and the kids were screaming. I thought, what 61 00:03:08,919 --> 00:03:11,520 Speaker 3: are they screaming at? We're away, And I put my 62 00:03:11,560 --> 00:03:13,720 Speaker 3: hand in my face and I thought, why is my 63 00:03:13,800 --> 00:03:14,880 Speaker 3: ear hanging down in my. 64 00:03:14,919 --> 00:03:19,560 Speaker 1: Chin oh ripped your hair off? Mat Oh my. 65 00:03:19,280 --> 00:03:23,520 Speaker 3: God effect that Wow, I tell you what. 66 00:03:23,919 --> 00:03:25,720 Speaker 1: You've done about it? 67 00:03:27,840 --> 00:03:28,800 Speaker 3: Wow? 68 00:03:28,400 --> 00:03:33,040 Speaker 1: The time two thousand facts getting your ear ripped off 69 00:03:33,040 --> 00:03:36,440 Speaker 1: by kangaroo. That doesn't win your two thousand dollars in 70 00:03:36,480 --> 00:03:39,200 Speaker 1: a two minute story. I don't know what will. That's 71 00:03:39,200 --> 00:03:42,680 Speaker 1: all yours, mad pleasure. It was a it was a 72 00:03:42,720 --> 00:03:45,960 Speaker 1: cracking yarn. I'm gonna be honest, you're lot. I had 73 00:03:46,400 --> 00:03:49,200 Speaker 1: all throughout that spot. I was signaling to our button 74 00:03:49,200 --> 00:03:51,720 Speaker 1: bush of George by running a finger across my throat. 75 00:03:51,760 --> 00:03:55,000 Speaker 1: And when you were talking sausage, sandwiches and lakes, the 76 00:03:55,080 --> 00:03:57,520 Speaker 1: finger was at the neck. It was it was close. 77 00:03:57,600 --> 00:04:00,000 Speaker 2: You're lucky. I like kangaroo stories. Matthew wanted to hear 78 00:04:00,160 --> 00:04:02,120 Speaker 2: what happened. He stuck around. 79 00:04:02,440 --> 00:04:05,200 Speaker 1: Well done, So did you get the years so back on? 80 00:04:05,480 --> 00:04:07,920 Speaker 3: Or what happened? The rest of the story got interesting. 81 00:04:08,000 --> 00:04:10,760 Speaker 3: I got taken to the hospital, yeah, and they said 82 00:04:11,240 --> 00:04:13,960 Speaker 3: we might have a plastic surgeon here. So the ambulance 83 00:04:14,040 --> 00:04:16,240 Speaker 3: drivers pushed me through the door, and this little little 84 00:04:16,279 --> 00:04:18,520 Speaker 3: guy behind the count says, I've done a bit of plastics. 85 00:04:18,839 --> 00:04:20,479 Speaker 3: My name's doctor Quock Sucker. 86 00:04:21,600 --> 00:04:29,360 Speaker 1: Well, so I lost I love that nobody saw that coming. Clocksucker, 87 00:04:31,040 --> 00:04:32,400 Speaker 1: totally what and did he do it? 88 00:04:32,880 --> 00:04:35,320 Speaker 3: Did the he did? Sew it back on? 89 00:04:35,560 --> 00:04:40,960 Speaker 1: Good on him, Good on him. Amazing story. Winter is 90 00:04:41,000 --> 00:04:44,200 Speaker 1: the time for smooth, satisfying favor Old Winter is Guinness season. 91 00:04:44,240 --> 00:04:47,640 Speaker 1: Drig responds with one of the great all time stories there, Matt. Congratulations, 92 00:04:47,680 --> 00:04:50,480 Speaker 1: two thousand dollars all yours all thanks to get Us. 93 00:04:50,760 --> 00:04:53,640 Speaker 2: Now you're done with that, why not check out more 94 00:04:53,720 --> 00:04:56,440 Speaker 2: from Willen Woody on The Full Show podcast.