1
00:00:03,440 --> 00:00:05,519
Speaker 1: It's the Happy Families podcast.

2
00:00:05,920 --> 00:00:10,119
Speaker 2: It's the podcast for the time poor parent who just answers.

3
00:00:10,200 --> 00:00:10,399
Speaker 3: Now.

4
00:00:10,680 --> 00:00:13,520
Speaker 1: Well, it's Friday, and every Friday on the Happy Families Podcast,

5
00:00:13,600 --> 00:00:15,960
Speaker 1: we dive into an episode that we called I'll Do

6
00:00:16,120 --> 00:00:18,560
Speaker 1: Better Tomorrow. This is the bit where we reflect on

7
00:00:18,640 --> 00:00:20,680
Speaker 1: the week that was. We talked about what worked in

8
00:00:20,720 --> 00:00:23,439
Speaker 1: our parenting and what didn't because we wanted to be

9
00:00:23,680 --> 00:00:27,480
Speaker 1: better to parents. Before we dive in with Kylie sharing something,

10
00:00:28,040 --> 00:00:31,920
Speaker 1: our executive producer Craig Bruce sends something through that really

11
00:00:31,960 --> 00:00:33,760
Speaker 1: caught me. I think in light of all of the

12
00:00:34,440 --> 00:00:38,400
Speaker 1: emotional challenges that we've had as we've gone through the

13
00:00:38,440 --> 00:00:42,080
Speaker 1: farewelling of our nephew Logan over the last a little while,

14
00:00:42,880 --> 00:00:45,000
Speaker 1: this one just it caught my attention and I thought

15
00:00:45,159 --> 00:00:47,480
Speaker 1: it might be nice to kick off the podcast with this.

16
00:00:47,479 --> 00:00:50,879
Speaker 1: This is the author William Martin on the Wonders of

17
00:00:51,040 --> 00:00:55,920
Speaker 1: Ordinary Life. And it's funny when when you lose someone

18
00:00:56,040 --> 00:00:58,639
Speaker 1: or something that matters a great deal to you, how

19
00:00:58,680 --> 00:01:02,120
Speaker 1: easy it is hopefully find wonder in the ordinary. Again.

20
00:01:02,520 --> 00:01:05,000
Speaker 1: He said this, and I quote, do not ask your

21
00:01:05,080 --> 00:01:10,160
Speaker 1: children to strive for extraordinary lives. Such striving may seem admirable,

22
00:01:10,640 --> 00:01:13,800
Speaker 1: but it's the way of foolishness. Help them instead to

23
00:01:13,800 --> 00:01:16,839
Speaker 1: find the wonder and the marvel of an ordinary life.

24
00:01:17,400 --> 00:01:20,760
Speaker 1: Show them the joy of tasting tomatoes, apples and pears,

25
00:01:21,240 --> 00:01:24,039
Speaker 1: Show them how to cry when pets and people die,

26
00:01:25,000 --> 00:01:27,920
Speaker 1: Show them the infinite pleasure in the touch of a hand,

27
00:01:28,440 --> 00:01:33,640
Speaker 1: and make the ordinary come alive for them. The extraordinary

28
00:01:33,720 --> 00:01:37,479
Speaker 1: will take care of itself. Kylie, I'll do that. It's tomorrow.

29
00:01:37,800 --> 00:01:39,640
Speaker 1: It's over to you. I have no idea what you're

30
00:01:39,680 --> 00:01:41,679
Speaker 1: going to share, but I'm curious to know what you've

31
00:01:41,720 --> 00:01:44,080
Speaker 1: learned about parenting, what your insights have been for how

32
00:01:44,120 --> 00:01:46,720
Speaker 1: we can be better parents This week.

33
00:01:47,520 --> 00:01:49,480
Speaker 2: Well, it's no secret the last few weeks have been

34
00:01:49,680 --> 00:01:54,040
Speaker 2: extremely challenging in our house, and there has been zero

35
00:01:54,120 --> 00:01:58,360
Speaker 2: routine or any kind of normality to the way we're

36
00:01:58,360 --> 00:01:59,280
Speaker 2: doing life right now.

37
00:01:59,400 --> 00:02:02,080
Speaker 1: No, not really functional, I think would be how i'd

38
00:02:02,120 --> 00:02:02,440
Speaker 1: say it.

39
00:02:02,840 --> 00:02:07,680
Speaker 2: We've had beautiful friends bring us meals and take care

40
00:02:07,720 --> 00:02:11,040
Speaker 2: of us in just such personal ways, and I've been

41
00:02:11,200 --> 00:02:14,480
Speaker 2: so grateful for that. But a couple of days ago,

42
00:02:14,880 --> 00:02:17,239
Speaker 2: it was just me and Emily at home, Miss nine,

43
00:02:17,800 --> 00:02:22,720
Speaker 2: and the house was in an uproar. It was turned

44
00:02:22,800 --> 00:02:25,640
Speaker 2: upside down. We've had some work done out in the yard,

45
00:02:25,800 --> 00:02:28,760
Speaker 2: and the dust from that has just come through the

46
00:02:28,800 --> 00:02:34,440
Speaker 2: house like a tornado, and everything was just feeling hard,

47
00:02:34,840 --> 00:02:36,560
Speaker 2: and so I asked her whether or not she would

48
00:02:36,600 --> 00:02:41,480
Speaker 2: help me get some cleaning done, and she was not impressed,

49
00:02:42,080 --> 00:02:45,640
Speaker 2: so she stormed off because she wanted to watch the TP. Anyway,

50
00:02:45,680 --> 00:02:49,080
Speaker 2: A few minutes later, I said, Emily, I'm really missing you.

51
00:02:49,200 --> 00:02:52,480
Speaker 2: I'd love some help. She said, well, I'd like to

52
00:02:52,480 --> 00:02:54,720
Speaker 2: watch the TP. We don't always get what we want

53
00:02:56,040 --> 00:03:02,040
Speaker 2: that soid oh, I said, you are right, we don't

54
00:03:02,040 --> 00:03:03,040
Speaker 2: always care what we want.

55
00:03:03,240 --> 00:03:04,519
Speaker 1: You're not going to get to watch to see.

56
00:03:05,720 --> 00:03:08,800
Speaker 2: So I just kept working slowly by myself, and then

57
00:03:08,840 --> 00:03:11,440
Speaker 2: about five minutes later I said, Emily, I said I'm

58
00:03:11,480 --> 00:03:13,600
Speaker 2: missing you. I said, would you like to come and

59
00:03:13,639 --> 00:03:16,799
Speaker 2: help me? And I heard some grumbling down from the

60
00:03:16,840 --> 00:03:18,800
Speaker 2: other end of the house, and so I left it

61
00:03:18,880 --> 00:03:23,120
Speaker 2: and I just kept working. And then about five minutes later,

62
00:03:23,240 --> 00:03:26,440
Speaker 2: I said, Emily, would you like to unpack the dishwasher?

63
00:03:26,680 --> 00:03:28,639
Speaker 2: And I don't know what it is about the dishwasher,

64
00:03:29,880 --> 00:03:32,160
Speaker 2: and I don't think she's ever responded this way before,

65
00:03:32,200 --> 00:03:35,920
Speaker 2: but she said, sure thing, Mom, and she came racing

66
00:03:35,960 --> 00:03:40,200
Speaker 2: down the corridor and started unpacking the dishwasher, and we

67
00:03:40,240 --> 00:03:43,040
Speaker 2: talked a little bit about you know, just as we

68
00:03:43,040 --> 00:03:47,040
Speaker 2: were working together, we talked side by side, and sometimes

69
00:03:47,160 --> 00:03:49,200
Speaker 2: we get so caught up on the fact that we

70
00:03:49,280 --> 00:03:53,400
Speaker 2: need them to be compliant in the moment, and like

71
00:03:53,440 --> 00:03:55,520
Speaker 2: I said, our house is not functioning the way it

72
00:03:55,560 --> 00:03:58,880
Speaker 2: usually would, and there are moments where we feel like

73
00:03:58,920 --> 00:04:00,800
Speaker 2: everything's fine, and then there are moments where we just

74
00:04:00,920 --> 00:04:03,280
Speaker 2: kind of crumble in a heap and are really really

75
00:04:03,280 --> 00:04:06,240
Speaker 2: struggling with our own emotions. And I can't imagine what

76
00:04:06,440 --> 00:04:08,760
Speaker 2: it is like for our kids not only to be

77
00:04:08,880 --> 00:04:11,760
Speaker 2: experiencing their own emotions, but then to watch the big

78
00:04:11,760 --> 00:04:13,720
Speaker 2: people in their world, the people that make them feel

79
00:04:13,720 --> 00:04:18,120
Speaker 2: safe and secure, not dealing with it really well. And so,

80
00:04:18,240 --> 00:04:19,720
Speaker 2: in spite of the fact that it was a little

81
00:04:19,720 --> 00:04:23,080
Speaker 2: bit frustrating that she wasn't complying in the first moment,

82
00:04:23,240 --> 00:04:25,920
Speaker 2: I love that was just a little bit of time

83
00:04:26,080 --> 00:04:28,159
Speaker 2: and a little bit of patience and a little bit

84
00:04:28,279 --> 00:04:34,440
Speaker 2: of kindness and compassion to her situation that I was

85
00:04:34,480 --> 00:04:39,320
Speaker 2: able to facilitate her ability to step into the moment

86
00:04:39,440 --> 00:04:43,000
Speaker 2: and help and the change that that had in our

87
00:04:43,040 --> 00:04:47,160
Speaker 2: home in that little moment was just really beautiful. So

88
00:04:47,279 --> 00:04:50,840
Speaker 2: may I'll do better tomorrow. It's just an acknowledgment that

89
00:04:51,200 --> 00:04:53,760
Speaker 2: as parents we want things to done right now. We

90
00:04:53,839 --> 00:04:56,239
Speaker 2: kind of see a need, we see something that he's doing,

91
00:04:56,320 --> 00:04:58,200
Speaker 2: and we expect that our kids are going to be

92
00:04:58,240 --> 00:05:01,000
Speaker 2: complying in the moment. And you talk a lot about

93
00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:04,200
Speaker 2: this idea of force creates resistance. When our kids feel

94
00:05:04,200 --> 00:05:07,000
Speaker 2: like they don't have a choice, they're less likely to

95
00:05:07,040 --> 00:05:11,920
Speaker 2: want to help. But all of us want to connect.

96
00:05:12,839 --> 00:05:16,400
Speaker 2: And each time I made a bid for connection with Emily,

97
00:05:16,480 --> 00:05:20,280
Speaker 2: I got a little bit closer to her being desirous

98
00:05:20,320 --> 00:05:23,240
Speaker 2: of that, And in that next moment, there was just

99
00:05:23,279 --> 00:05:25,920
Speaker 2: this beautiful connection, which I'm so grateful for.

100
00:05:26,279 --> 00:05:28,400
Speaker 1: Love that you shared that. Something that I wrote about

101
00:05:28,400 --> 00:05:30,719
Speaker 1: a lot in The Parenting Revolution is how when we

102
00:05:30,760 --> 00:05:33,360
Speaker 1: invite our children's involvement, but we give them the opportunity

103
00:05:33,400 --> 00:05:36,839
Speaker 1: to be self determining and to step into that involvement

104
00:05:36,839 --> 00:05:39,360
Speaker 1: when they're ready for it, we get much better outcomes.

105
00:05:39,600 --> 00:05:43,960
Speaker 1: I remember stepping into the kitchen and seeing her involved

106
00:05:44,040 --> 00:05:47,560
Speaker 1: with you, and she was so happy to be involved.

107
00:05:48,120 --> 00:05:51,479
Speaker 1: It really stood out to me that when children are

108
00:05:51,560 --> 00:05:54,919
Speaker 1: choosing on now knowing the broader context, when children choose involvement,

109
00:05:55,040 --> 00:05:56,599
Speaker 1: it works so much better than when we have to

110
00:05:56,880 --> 00:05:58,080
Speaker 1: force involvement.

111
00:06:01,279 --> 00:06:03,400
Speaker 2: I'm interested to know what you have to share today.

112
00:06:03,440 --> 00:06:06,400
Speaker 1: So I'm going to share a couple of things, because

113
00:06:07,320 --> 00:06:09,719
Speaker 1: when you go through really difficult times, I think you

114
00:06:09,839 --> 00:06:12,040
Speaker 1: learn a lot. The first thing that I want to

115
00:06:12,040 --> 00:06:15,440
Speaker 1: share is just a quick anecdote, a quick story. It's

116
00:06:15,640 --> 00:06:18,400
Speaker 1: just over a week old now, but while we were

117
00:06:18,400 --> 00:06:22,880
Speaker 1: in Gosford on the New Southwest Central Coast, the funeral

118
00:06:22,880 --> 00:06:25,479
Speaker 1: for Logan was held on Friday. We had a day

119
00:06:25,480 --> 00:06:28,520
Speaker 1: of nothing on Saturday, and then on Sunday morning it

120
00:06:28,560 --> 00:06:31,480
Speaker 1: was the paddle out at Terry gill Haven with about

121
00:06:31,520 --> 00:06:34,159
Speaker 1: two hundred and fifty people. But on that Saturday I

122
00:06:34,279 --> 00:06:36,240
Speaker 1: decided that I was going to go for a surf.

123
00:06:36,600 --> 00:06:38,280
Speaker 1: I caught up with some friends because that's where I

124
00:06:38,279 --> 00:06:41,320
Speaker 1: grew up, and I went surfing and just had a

125
00:06:41,360 --> 00:06:44,359
Speaker 1: great time, caught some wonderful waves and tested out my

126
00:06:44,400 --> 00:06:47,679
Speaker 1: neck and back now that I'm sort of getting active

127
00:06:47,680 --> 00:06:50,120
Speaker 1: again after my neck break and my back break a

128
00:06:50,200 --> 00:06:52,839
Speaker 1: couple of months ago, and it felt really good. I

129
00:06:52,880 --> 00:06:54,640
Speaker 1: had that surf, but what I really wanted to do

130
00:06:54,720 --> 00:06:56,200
Speaker 1: was take the kids to the beach and help them

131
00:06:56,279 --> 00:06:59,320
Speaker 1: to catch some waves. So around about mid morning, around

132
00:06:59,360 --> 00:07:01,680
Speaker 1: abou nine o'clock, we grabbed the kids, we put them

133
00:07:01,680 --> 00:07:05,719
Speaker 1: in the car, called my brother and my parents and

134
00:07:05,839 --> 00:07:07,800
Speaker 1: just told everybody head down to a voca. We're going

135
00:07:07,839 --> 00:07:09,840
Speaker 1: to go down to the pine trees. There's some little

136
00:07:09,840 --> 00:07:11,560
Speaker 1: waves there. I think if we take the kids out

137
00:07:11,560 --> 00:07:13,360
Speaker 1: on the surfboards, we can have a really great time.

138
00:07:14,080 --> 00:07:17,360
Speaker 1: When we got there, I had my favorite board, which

139
00:07:17,400 --> 00:07:18,800
Speaker 1: is a board that I've had for a couple of

140
00:07:18,880 --> 00:07:21,520
Speaker 1: years now, and I also had a brand new board

141
00:07:21,560 --> 00:07:23,880
Speaker 1: that we bought on the way through Coffs Harbor. We

142
00:07:23,880 --> 00:07:25,520
Speaker 1: stopped in at Cooper's Surf Store on the way through

143
00:07:25,520 --> 00:07:27,840
Speaker 1: Coffs Harbor and I picked up a brand new board

144
00:07:28,080 --> 00:07:29,880
Speaker 1: on the way through. I just, I don't know, I

145
00:07:29,880 --> 00:07:32,000
Speaker 1: wanted to buy a new board. Logan has passed away.

146
00:07:32,360 --> 00:07:34,440
Speaker 1: He loved to surf. I love to surf, and I

147
00:07:34,520 --> 00:07:37,080
Speaker 1: just wanted to have a new board for I don't know,

148
00:07:37,120 --> 00:07:39,280
Speaker 1: because I felt like I needed a new surfboard. So

149
00:07:39,320 --> 00:07:42,680
Speaker 1: I bought something really different and not your traditional kind

150
00:07:42,680 --> 00:07:45,600
Speaker 1: of surfboard, something that's really really quite a different board.

151
00:07:45,640 --> 00:07:47,600
Speaker 1: It's called a quad so it's got four fins in

152
00:07:47,640 --> 00:07:49,920
Speaker 1: it and just just a totally different shape. Really excited

153
00:07:49,960 --> 00:07:51,840
Speaker 1: about the board, too much detail, Let me move on.

154
00:07:52,840 --> 00:07:55,400
Speaker 1: When we walked down the beach, my brother Tim and

155
00:07:55,440 --> 00:07:57,560
Speaker 1: his two sons, their age somewhere around that sort of

156
00:07:57,600 --> 00:08:02,560
Speaker 1: seven through to ten or eleven age mark. They were

157
00:08:02,920 --> 00:08:04,320
Speaker 1: sort of saying, can we have a surf? Can we

158
00:08:04,360 --> 00:08:05,960
Speaker 1: have surf? Dad? And he had a couple of those,

159
00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:08,840
Speaker 1: you know, the big fat boards that the Surf Life

160
00:08:08,880 --> 00:08:10,960
Speaker 1: savers right on on their knees. They had a couple

161
00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:13,040
Speaker 1: of those, but they really wanted to surf. And I said, oh,

162
00:08:13,040 --> 00:08:14,560
Speaker 1: they can jump on my board. I'll take them out

163
00:08:14,600 --> 00:08:17,280
Speaker 1: and I'll show them how to do some surfing. And

164
00:08:17,320 --> 00:08:19,720
Speaker 1: he looked at me and said, but be good boards.

165
00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:21,600
Speaker 1: And I said, yeah, that's okay. And he said, oh,

166
00:08:21,640 --> 00:08:24,080
Speaker 1: we can't let them ride the good boards. And I said, no, no,

167
00:08:24,280 --> 00:08:26,920
Speaker 1: you don't understand it's okay. He said, but that one's

168
00:08:26,960 --> 00:08:28,600
Speaker 1: brand new. You've only had it for two or three days.

169
00:08:28,640 --> 00:08:30,880
Speaker 1: What if something happens to it? And I got to

170
00:08:30,960 --> 00:08:34,760
Speaker 1: use my favorite line with my little brother. I said, Tim,

171
00:08:34,960 --> 00:08:37,840
Speaker 1: people matter, things, don't the worst thing that can happen

172
00:08:38,040 --> 00:08:39,480
Speaker 1: is that the board gets a dig in it and

173
00:08:39,480 --> 00:08:43,480
Speaker 1: if it does, I'll repair it. It's okay, and I

174
00:08:43,600 --> 00:08:46,120
Speaker 1: just this is something that we talk about regularly on

175
00:08:46,160 --> 00:08:48,360
Speaker 1: the podcast, but it was beautiful to be able to

176
00:08:48,400 --> 00:08:51,000
Speaker 1: say it and really mean it. And I know, I

177
00:08:51,000 --> 00:08:52,840
Speaker 1: guess in some ways it's a privileged position to be

178
00:08:52,880 --> 00:08:54,200
Speaker 1: in to be able to say, yes, if the board

179
00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:57,320
Speaker 1: gets damaged, I will get it repaired. But honestly, a

180
00:08:57,320 --> 00:09:00,200
Speaker 1: surfboard repair only costs like fifty or seventy buckses not

181
00:09:00,240 --> 00:09:02,400
Speaker 1: that expensive anyway. But to be able to say that

182
00:09:02,440 --> 00:09:04,079
Speaker 1: and to really mean it, and to be able to

183
00:09:04,120 --> 00:09:07,440
Speaker 1: prioritize the kids and their joy, to give the kids

184
00:09:07,440 --> 00:09:10,480
Speaker 1: the experience of riding a really, really great and brand

185
00:09:10,520 --> 00:09:13,240
Speaker 1: new surfboard, their eyes lit up. They couldn't believe that

186
00:09:13,280 --> 00:09:15,200
Speaker 1: they were able to do it, and it was just

187
00:09:15,200 --> 00:09:17,079
Speaker 1: so much fun to take them out there and let

188
00:09:17,080 --> 00:09:21,640
Speaker 1: them catch those waves. Typically, historically I've had a different view.

189
00:09:21,840 --> 00:09:25,000
Speaker 1: Nobody touches the good stuff except me because I'm the

190
00:09:25,040 --> 00:09:26,880
Speaker 1: only one that knows how to use it. But it

191
00:09:26,880 --> 00:09:30,440
Speaker 1: feels so much more generous, It feels so much larger

192
00:09:30,920 --> 00:09:33,840
Speaker 1: to say, yeah, let's just go and have this experience together,

193
00:09:34,440 --> 00:09:38,360
Speaker 1: and as I pushed one of my little nephews onto

194
00:09:38,400 --> 00:09:40,760
Speaker 1: a wave that he was scared to catch, that was

195
00:09:40,800 --> 00:09:43,000
Speaker 1: way too big for him, And as he rode that

196
00:09:43,080 --> 00:09:45,720
Speaker 1: wave and then stood up on that wave, and the

197
00:09:45,880 --> 00:09:47,560
Speaker 1: joy on his face and the fact that he couldn't

198
00:09:47,559 --> 00:09:49,240
Speaker 1: stop talking about it for the next couple of days,

199
00:09:49,840 --> 00:09:53,319
Speaker 1: it was so worth it. It was just so worth it.

200
00:09:53,480 --> 00:09:55,760
Speaker 1: So that's kind of my old do better tomorrow. Stop

201
00:09:55,960 --> 00:09:58,679
Speaker 1: being precious about all of this stuff, because the stuff

202
00:09:58,720 --> 00:10:02,240
Speaker 1: doesn't matter. It's the experience and the relationships and the

203
00:10:02,320 --> 00:10:05,000
Speaker 1: development and the growth that matter the most.

204
00:10:05,559 --> 00:10:08,200
Speaker 2: I love the acknowledgment that you've made that it is

205
00:10:08,480 --> 00:10:10,760
Speaker 2: at a privileged space that you sit in when you're able

206
00:10:10,800 --> 00:10:14,600
Speaker 2: to acknowledge that it doesn't actually matter. The stuff doesn't matter.

207
00:10:15,120 --> 00:10:19,959
Speaker 3: I remember growing up and my mum had a commemoration

208
00:10:20,320 --> 00:10:25,120
Speaker 3: plate for Diana, Princess Diana and Prince Charles's wedding.

209
00:10:25,520 --> 00:10:27,800
Speaker 1: A commemoration plate. Oh okay, yeah, yeah, like the ones

210
00:10:27,840 --> 00:10:28,959
Speaker 1: that used to put on the walls or in the

211
00:10:29,040 --> 00:10:30,280
Speaker 1: wall year Yeah yeah, yeah, I know.

212
00:10:30,400 --> 00:10:32,679
Speaker 2: And I was doing the dusting one day and I

213
00:10:32,800 --> 00:10:36,240
Speaker 2: dropped it, and I was so scared to tell her

214
00:10:37,480 --> 00:10:41,800
Speaker 2: because I knew that it was important to her, and

215
00:10:42,559 --> 00:10:45,520
Speaker 2: it didn't always happen like this, but that particular day,

216
00:10:45,559 --> 00:10:47,240
Speaker 2: my mum just kind of grabbed me into a hug

217
00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:49,120
Speaker 2: and just said, you know what, it doesn't matter. It's

218
00:10:49,160 --> 00:10:52,840
Speaker 2: just a plate. And I think it's a really valuable

219
00:10:52,880 --> 00:10:56,880
Speaker 2: lesson that we can all learn from recognize that the

220
00:10:56,920 --> 00:10:59,920
Speaker 2: relationships and our lives are so much more important than things.

221
00:11:00,320 --> 00:11:05,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, hearing you talk, for those who can hear the

222
00:11:05,480 --> 00:11:08,000
Speaker 1: emotion in your voice, we're still just so tender, aren't we?

223
00:11:08,200 --> 00:11:11,440
Speaker 1: Like we're really there's been so much going on. I

224
00:11:11,640 --> 00:11:13,360
Speaker 1: mentioned that there are two things that I wanted to share,

225
00:11:13,440 --> 00:11:16,960
Speaker 1: and I just want to touch on them briefly. At

226
00:11:17,000 --> 00:11:21,679
Speaker 1: a time of great loss, it's an opportunity to reevaluate

227
00:11:21,720 --> 00:11:23,280
Speaker 1: your life and to pause and say, chee, have we

228
00:11:23,320 --> 00:11:27,320
Speaker 1: got our priorities right? And something that we made a

229
00:11:27,360 --> 00:11:30,160
Speaker 1: commitment to on our way driving back to the Sunshine

230
00:11:30,160 --> 00:11:31,880
Speaker 1: Coast from the Central Coast, and we got to sit

231
00:11:31,920 --> 00:11:33,559
Speaker 1: in the car for a little over ten hours and

232
00:11:34,520 --> 00:11:37,520
Speaker 1: talk and contemplate and reflect, and we made a couple

233
00:11:37,520 --> 00:11:41,119
Speaker 1: of decisions that might also be a little bit inspirational

234
00:11:41,160 --> 00:11:43,559
Speaker 1: for people as they reflect on how they can be

235
00:11:43,559 --> 00:11:47,679
Speaker 1: better parents and build more love and more focus on

236
00:11:48,160 --> 00:11:51,280
Speaker 1: the important things into their family life. So we talked

237
00:11:51,280 --> 00:11:53,280
Speaker 1: about what we were going to do differently, what we'd

238
00:11:53,320 --> 00:11:56,599
Speaker 1: learned as a result, and we made a couple of commitments.

239
00:11:57,160 --> 00:12:00,560
Speaker 1: The first is that you have family quite close to us.

240
00:12:00,559 --> 00:12:03,200
Speaker 1: So we've got your sister and her family within about

241
00:12:03,240 --> 00:12:06,880
Speaker 1: ten minutes drive, but your mum and your other sister

242
00:12:07,240 --> 00:12:09,040
Speaker 1: are also only about an hour and a half away.

243
00:12:09,280 --> 00:12:11,679
Speaker 1: So we've made a commitment to having a monthly family

244
00:12:11,880 --> 00:12:14,640
Speaker 1: dinner with your entire family. We need to build those

245
00:12:14,640 --> 00:12:18,600
Speaker 1: relationships and it's a wonderful opportunity when you're close enough

246
00:12:18,600 --> 00:12:20,960
Speaker 1: to do that. But we also have my family who

247
00:12:21,040 --> 00:12:25,240
Speaker 1: are not nearby, and so we've also committed that on

248
00:12:25,240 --> 00:12:28,040
Speaker 1: one weekend every single month, unless we have a family

249
00:12:28,080 --> 00:12:30,840
Speaker 1: trip planned already, we're going to jump in the car

250
00:12:31,080 --> 00:12:34,760
Speaker 1: and spend two or three nights somewhere else. We're going

251
00:12:34,800 --> 00:12:36,959
Speaker 1: to go places where our family are. We've got family

252
00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:39,120
Speaker 1: on the Gold Coast, we've got family around that Bangalow

253
00:12:39,160 --> 00:12:41,480
Speaker 1: Ballooner area. We've got family down in the Yamba and

254
00:12:41,559 --> 00:12:43,920
Speaker 1: Gowery area. We've got family on the New South Wales

255
00:12:43,960 --> 00:12:46,320
Speaker 1: Central coast, like we've got family up and down the

256
00:12:46,320 --> 00:12:49,600
Speaker 1: Eastern Seaboard, and we've made a commitment that we are

257
00:12:49,640 --> 00:12:53,400
Speaker 1: going to invest in those relationships and invest in time

258
00:12:53,440 --> 00:12:56,280
Speaker 1: away having experiences with the kids, will stay at cheap

259
00:12:56,360 --> 00:12:58,920
Speaker 1: places like big four caravan parks or something like that,

260
00:12:58,960 --> 00:13:00,720
Speaker 1: so that we can afford to do something like this.

261
00:13:01,440 --> 00:13:03,960
Speaker 1: But we just keep on finding all the reasons not

262
00:13:03,960 --> 00:13:05,840
Speaker 1: to do it, or we just don't get intentional enough

263
00:13:05,840 --> 00:13:08,800
Speaker 1: about it. And the last couple of weeks, if they've

264
00:13:08,800 --> 00:13:11,320
Speaker 1: taught us anything, it's that we need to be investing

265
00:13:11,360 --> 00:13:13,920
Speaker 1: in our family relationships, both our immediate family but also

266
00:13:13,920 --> 00:13:19,240
Speaker 1: our extended family. There is so much value in extended

267
00:13:19,559 --> 00:13:24,360
Speaker 1: family relationships. So they're a our commitments, and that's our

268
00:13:24,600 --> 00:13:27,840
Speaker 1: I'll do better tomorrow. We really hope that there's some

269
00:13:27,880 --> 00:13:30,160
Speaker 1: inspiration in there for you and your family, and then

270
00:13:30,160 --> 00:13:32,720
Speaker 1: it gets you, i don't know, rethinking the way you're

271
00:13:32,720 --> 00:13:35,480
Speaker 1: doing things. Maybe you'll make some commitments. Maybe you'll just

272
00:13:35,679 --> 00:13:37,800
Speaker 1: keep doing what you're doing because you're actually doing it

273
00:13:37,840 --> 00:13:40,120
Speaker 1: really well and you're dialed in already. But we appreciate

274
00:13:40,160 --> 00:13:43,320
Speaker 1: so much you listening to our podcast today. Thank you

275
00:13:43,360 --> 00:13:46,480
Speaker 1: for joining us as we navigate a tricky time in

276
00:13:46,520 --> 00:13:50,160
Speaker 1: our own family. Have a wonderful weekend, and we'll see

277
00:13:50,160 --> 00:13:52,679
Speaker 1: you again on Monday. The Happy Family's podcast is produced

278
00:13:52,679 --> 00:13:55,199
Speaker 1: by Justin Roland from Bridge Media. Craig Bruce is our

279
00:13:55,240 --> 00:13:58,440
Speaker 1: executive producer and more information about making your family happier

280
00:13:58,440 --> 00:14:01,320
Speaker 1: is available at Happy families dot com or quickly one

281
00:14:01,320 --> 00:14:04,000
Speaker 1: more thing. Our Black Friday sales are all over the

282
00:14:04,000 --> 00:14:06,760
Speaker 1: Internet today. Jump onto Happy families dot com, dot you,

283
00:14:06,920 --> 00:14:09,760
Speaker 1: or our Facebook page Dr Justin Colson's Happy Families to

284
00:14:09,800 --> 00:14:13,560
Speaker 1: take advantage of Black Friday sales right now