1 00:00:01,440 --> 00:00:04,720 Speaker 1: And Amanda jam Nation. Hello, Julie, how are you? 2 00:00:04,800 --> 00:00:06,280 Speaker 2: Good morning? I'm well, thank you. 3 00:00:06,400 --> 00:00:09,240 Speaker 1: Before we go any further in TikTok Tucker, we try 4 00:00:09,320 --> 00:00:11,200 Speaker 1: food that we've seen on TikTok. We think that looks 5 00:00:11,200 --> 00:00:13,000 Speaker 1: a bit odd? Is it going to be a success 6 00:00:13,080 --> 00:00:17,160 Speaker 1: or a disaster? Before you is a bowl of pork crackling? 7 00:00:17,560 --> 00:00:19,960 Speaker 1: Would you mind putting it? Let's help you make this 8 00:00:20,160 --> 00:00:21,600 Speaker 1: very detailed recipe. 9 00:00:21,720 --> 00:00:23,000 Speaker 3: Julie, do this if you can. 10 00:00:23,040 --> 00:00:26,159 Speaker 1: You pour some milk into that, Pour some milk on 11 00:00:27,120 --> 00:00:31,000 Speaker 1: milk on pork crackling, and then some cinnamon and a 12 00:00:31,080 --> 00:00:33,360 Speaker 1: dollop of cream and see what you make of it. 13 00:00:33,440 --> 00:00:35,519 Speaker 1: Because we weren't sure. We went like it hated like 14 00:00:35,560 --> 00:00:38,520 Speaker 1: it hated out. Our taste buds were all over the shop. 15 00:00:38,600 --> 00:00:40,680 Speaker 3: Can you add the cinnamon like salt Bay does. 16 00:00:42,360 --> 00:00:46,200 Speaker 4: I don't want to make a message. You probably sneeze 17 00:00:46,479 --> 00:00:49,800 Speaker 4: and cream and a dollip of cream. This is like keito. 18 00:00:49,920 --> 00:00:53,639 Speaker 4: I think it's got no carbs and extra fat. That's 19 00:00:53,640 --> 00:00:54,640 Speaker 4: what keto is all about. 20 00:00:54,720 --> 00:00:56,760 Speaker 1: But I don't know if you'd normally put pork crackling 21 00:00:56,760 --> 00:00:59,840 Speaker 1: in a cereal. All right, you're going into you're going 22 00:00:59,840 --> 00:01:03,840 Speaker 1: in still get a big bit of crackling happening. Really yep, 23 00:01:04,200 --> 00:01:09,559 Speaker 1: Oh god, you're pulling a face. 24 00:01:09,920 --> 00:01:13,160 Speaker 2: No, no, no, it's horrible. Oh that's horrible. 25 00:01:15,360 --> 00:01:17,160 Speaker 3: Apewban for Julie. 26 00:01:17,920 --> 00:01:21,080 Speaker 1: Has it gone down? See, you've been on I'm a celebrity. 27 00:01:21,080 --> 00:01:22,160 Speaker 1: You've tasted worse than that. 28 00:01:22,280 --> 00:01:25,000 Speaker 2: I've put worse things in that in my mouth. Oh 29 00:01:25,120 --> 00:01:26,959 Speaker 2: my god, that's why would you choose to do that? 30 00:01:27,080 --> 00:01:30,000 Speaker 1: I know, well, we're thinking the same thing, Julie. This 31 00:01:30,040 --> 00:01:32,920 Speaker 1: book is quite extraordinary because, as you say in the book, 32 00:01:32,959 --> 00:01:37,760 Speaker 1: you know well, as we know, loved Bubbly TV cookbook 33 00:01:37,880 --> 00:01:41,440 Speaker 1: radio host. But you've been very honest about the dark 34 00:01:41,520 --> 00:01:45,959 Speaker 1: sides too. How dark did it get? Oh? 35 00:01:46,000 --> 00:01:50,960 Speaker 4: Look, when the wheels fell off completely in sort of 36 00:01:50,960 --> 00:01:54,800 Speaker 4: twenty nineteen and the start of twenty twenty, it got 37 00:01:54,920 --> 00:01:59,800 Speaker 4: very I was unwell and it was life threatening, and 38 00:02:00,280 --> 00:02:02,680 Speaker 4: so I went all the way to the bottom and I, 39 00:02:03,680 --> 00:02:06,120 Speaker 4: you know, I very nearly didn't make it out. 40 00:02:06,360 --> 00:02:08,680 Speaker 1: Well, you write about how you went to the water, 41 00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:11,880 Speaker 1: the water's edge, and a couple and their dog. You 42 00:02:11,919 --> 00:02:14,360 Speaker 1: don't even know these people, you didn't. Then they pretty 43 00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:15,360 Speaker 1: much saved your life. 44 00:02:15,520 --> 00:02:18,760 Speaker 4: They did, they did. They had spotted me as I 45 00:02:18,800 --> 00:02:22,120 Speaker 4: walked past them, and you know, I was obviously in 46 00:02:22,160 --> 00:02:25,520 Speaker 4: a not a great state, and this young lady gave 47 00:02:25,560 --> 00:02:28,400 Speaker 4: me a hug. She said, you know, can I give 48 00:02:28,440 --> 00:02:29,720 Speaker 4: you a hug? And she gave me a hug and said, 49 00:02:29,760 --> 00:02:31,080 Speaker 4: are you okay? And I said, I'm okay. 50 00:02:31,120 --> 00:02:33,840 Speaker 2: Now it was a total life. And then I went 51 00:02:33,840 --> 00:02:34,040 Speaker 2: and I. 52 00:02:34,040 --> 00:02:36,760 Speaker 4: Sat on a bench and I was just getting ready, 53 00:02:36,880 --> 00:02:40,280 Speaker 4: and they came back and they sat next to me 54 00:02:40,320 --> 00:02:43,240 Speaker 4: and just said, you look like you need some company. 55 00:02:43,840 --> 00:02:45,800 Speaker 4: And they sat with me for a couple of hours 56 00:02:46,160 --> 00:02:51,360 Speaker 4: and just chatted about small stuff. And by the end 57 00:02:51,400 --> 00:02:53,799 Speaker 4: of that couple of hours, I was ready to ring 58 00:02:53,880 --> 00:02:55,560 Speaker 4: my husband and income and take me home. 59 00:02:55,639 --> 00:02:57,680 Speaker 1: Because the saddest thing is you felt that your family 60 00:02:57,760 --> 00:03:00,160 Speaker 1: would be relieved that because you'd been troublesome, and that 61 00:03:00,480 --> 00:03:03,880 Speaker 1: you felt that that they'd be relieved for you to go. 62 00:03:04,960 --> 00:03:07,639 Speaker 1: How wonderful you went home and they could convince you otherwise. 63 00:03:08,360 --> 00:03:11,480 Speaker 4: Well, yeah, and that I mean, it's not true. It's 64 00:03:11,520 --> 00:03:13,640 Speaker 4: not true that they would have been better off without me. 65 00:03:13,760 --> 00:03:17,880 Speaker 4: But that's in that time and in that that sickness 66 00:03:17,880 --> 00:03:20,840 Speaker 4: and that despair, I believe that I believe that to 67 00:03:20,880 --> 00:03:23,000 Speaker 4: the core of my being. That I was doing the 68 00:03:23,040 --> 00:03:27,400 Speaker 4: best thing for everybody. It wasn't about escaping. It was 69 00:03:27,560 --> 00:03:29,560 Speaker 4: literally about making what I thought was the best choice 70 00:03:29,560 --> 00:03:33,760 Speaker 4: for everybody, and it wasn't true. And I'm so grateful 71 00:03:33,919 --> 00:03:36,600 Speaker 4: that I had a moment and I was taken out 72 00:03:36,600 --> 00:03:39,480 Speaker 4: of that for long enough to reflect properly on it, 73 00:03:39,520 --> 00:03:41,560 Speaker 4: and to you know, I didn't. 74 00:03:42,160 --> 00:03:44,360 Speaker 2: I didn't get home that night. I was taken to hospital. 75 00:03:44,560 --> 00:03:47,880 Speaker 4: So you know, I got home much later that night, 76 00:03:47,920 --> 00:03:50,200 Speaker 4: but I was taken to hospital first. Mick just said, 77 00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:53,040 Speaker 4: I can't deal with this. I'm not equipped. I need 78 00:03:53,080 --> 00:03:57,120 Speaker 4: help from professionals, you know. Against I didn't want to 79 00:03:57,160 --> 00:03:58,600 Speaker 4: go to hospital. I was exhausted. 80 00:03:58,640 --> 00:03:59,720 Speaker 2: I want to go home. 81 00:04:01,680 --> 00:04:04,080 Speaker 4: But it was it was the start of, you know, 82 00:04:04,120 --> 00:04:06,960 Speaker 4: a long, long hall of getting better. 83 00:04:07,040 --> 00:04:10,200 Speaker 3: For that self awareness. Though you're sitting there and you're 84 00:04:10,200 --> 00:04:12,440 Speaker 3: at the brink. As you said, those people come along 85 00:04:12,800 --> 00:04:15,320 Speaker 3: and it wasn't wrapped up as easily as that. But 86 00:04:15,520 --> 00:04:18,559 Speaker 3: talk us through how and if anyone's in that same 87 00:04:20,040 --> 00:04:22,360 Speaker 3: state of mind, how do you come back from that? 88 00:04:22,400 --> 00:04:25,640 Speaker 3: What is it? If those people, for example, hadn't come along, 89 00:04:25,680 --> 00:04:26,800 Speaker 3: do you think you wouldn't be here? 90 00:04:27,320 --> 00:04:30,839 Speaker 2: Oh, there's a very very real possibility. 91 00:04:30,320 --> 00:04:32,600 Speaker 3: And that's what you need. And so I guess it 92 00:04:32,760 --> 00:04:35,200 Speaker 3: lays on everyone to be aware of your surrounds, be 93 00:04:35,240 --> 00:04:37,200 Speaker 3: aware of what's going on in the world. But that 94 00:04:37,920 --> 00:04:40,200 Speaker 3: assure is what switched you into that state of mind, 95 00:04:40,480 --> 00:04:41,560 Speaker 3: what switched you out of. 96 00:04:41,480 --> 00:04:44,320 Speaker 2: It in that moment. 97 00:04:44,480 --> 00:04:48,560 Speaker 4: It was just the ordinariness of this conversation. It was 98 00:04:48,640 --> 00:04:51,120 Speaker 4: they told me about their family, I told them about mine. 99 00:04:51,160 --> 00:04:53,840 Speaker 4: We talked about our dogs. They actually made me laugh 100 00:04:53,880 --> 00:04:57,480 Speaker 4: a couple of times, and it was that I. 101 00:04:57,440 --> 00:05:00,839 Speaker 2: Just went, how is it possible it possible for me 102 00:05:00,839 --> 00:05:01,159 Speaker 2: to laugh? 103 00:05:01,200 --> 00:05:04,200 Speaker 4: I didn't know there was any laughter left. I didn't know, 104 00:05:05,600 --> 00:05:07,400 Speaker 4: And so that sort of made me stop and think. 105 00:05:08,400 --> 00:05:12,880 Speaker 4: I would just say to anybody who's approaching anything nearing that, 106 00:05:14,080 --> 00:05:17,080 Speaker 4: talk to somebody. Just talk to somebody. And whether it's 107 00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:20,000 Speaker 4: somebody you know, whether it's a friend or a family member, 108 00:05:20,080 --> 00:05:23,160 Speaker 4: or whether you pick up a phone to you know, 109 00:05:23,279 --> 00:05:25,919 Speaker 4: a helpline beyond Blue. You know I do work with 110 00:05:25,960 --> 00:05:28,760 Speaker 4: they have amazing counselors and stuff. Just that's got to 111 00:05:28,760 --> 00:05:31,719 Speaker 4: be the first step. That's what saved my life, and 112 00:05:32,240 --> 00:05:34,279 Speaker 4: that's what I think would be life saving for other people. 113 00:05:35,400 --> 00:05:37,560 Speaker 4: This is why I've written this book, right, It's because 114 00:05:38,000 --> 00:05:40,920 Speaker 4: there's all these little signs and symptoms that lead up 115 00:05:40,960 --> 00:05:42,640 Speaker 4: to that. You don't just wake up one day and 116 00:05:42,680 --> 00:05:44,960 Speaker 4: decide that this is my last day. I can't do 117 00:05:45,040 --> 00:05:47,560 Speaker 4: this anymore. There are lots and lots of signs leading 118 00:05:47,600 --> 00:05:49,000 Speaker 4: up to it. And that's why I've written the book. 119 00:05:49,279 --> 00:05:52,400 Speaker 4: I would love for people to read it and go, actually, 120 00:05:52,880 --> 00:05:55,440 Speaker 4: I'm experiencing one or two of those things, or I 121 00:05:55,560 --> 00:05:59,039 Speaker 4: have a couple of those circumstances surrounding my life, you 122 00:05:59,080 --> 00:06:01,680 Speaker 4: know that overwhelmed, more, too busy, or no time for 123 00:06:02,520 --> 00:06:06,080 Speaker 4: beautiful things. Or I've got you know, unresolved trauma from 124 00:06:06,080 --> 00:06:09,520 Speaker 4: my past. That's I feel bubbling back up. Any of 125 00:06:09,520 --> 00:06:14,679 Speaker 4: those things start to talk now, because eventually the voices 126 00:06:14,800 --> 00:06:18,000 Speaker 4: in your head get louder than the voices outside your head, 127 00:06:18,320 --> 00:06:19,800 Speaker 4: and they're not telling you the right stuff. 128 00:06:20,839 --> 00:06:23,360 Speaker 1: Wow, very powerful. Thank you, Tulie. 129 00:06:23,720 --> 00:06:26,400 Speaker 3: That's amazing. That is amazing. And I would have been 130 00:06:26,480 --> 00:06:29,000 Speaker 3: terrible to make you eat that stuff. 131 00:06:29,000 --> 00:06:30,920 Speaker 1: You said all that. 132 00:06:31,480 --> 00:06:35,040 Speaker 2: It's coding, my man, a new chapter on your next cookbook. 133 00:06:35,080 --> 00:06:38,320 Speaker 2: Oh yes, that's what Not to cookbook? 134 00:06:38,680 --> 00:06:40,240 Speaker 3: But how do you feel now? 135 00:06:41,520 --> 00:06:44,640 Speaker 4: I'm good now, Jonesy. I've spent quite a few years 136 00:06:45,760 --> 00:06:48,760 Speaker 4: gone in and out of different treatments. But I've found 137 00:06:48,760 --> 00:06:52,440 Speaker 4: the person who who works with me on my brain, 138 00:06:52,640 --> 00:06:54,880 Speaker 4: and I've got a whole lot of strategies in place, 139 00:06:54,920 --> 00:06:57,599 Speaker 4: and they're all good for me, you know, they're all great, 140 00:06:57,680 --> 00:06:59,680 Speaker 4: and but you know, I think the most important one 141 00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:04,200 Speaker 4: is just choosing choosing joy and choosing to make sure 142 00:07:04,240 --> 00:07:07,000 Speaker 4: I prioritize things that bring me joy. 143 00:07:07,480 --> 00:07:10,320 Speaker 2: And you know, we don't tend to do that. 144 00:07:11,080 --> 00:07:13,040 Speaker 4: You know, we look around, we make sure everybody else 145 00:07:13,120 --> 00:07:16,280 Speaker 4: is okay, and we tend to neglect our own self. 146 00:07:16,360 --> 00:07:17,200 Speaker 2: But what I've. 147 00:07:17,240 --> 00:07:20,000 Speaker 4: Learned in a really real way is that if you 148 00:07:20,120 --> 00:07:22,600 Speaker 4: do continue to neglect yourself, then you're no good to 149 00:07:22,640 --> 00:07:25,760 Speaker 4: anybody at all. So if you want to be there 150 00:07:25,760 --> 00:07:28,400 Speaker 4: for your family and there for your friends, and present 151 00:07:28,440 --> 00:07:32,080 Speaker 4: to your colleagues and everybody else, you actually you hear 152 00:07:32,120 --> 00:07:35,080 Speaker 4: it over and over, but until until it hits home. Sure, 153 00:07:35,200 --> 00:07:38,240 Speaker 4: you know, you have to look after yourself. So I've 154 00:07:38,240 --> 00:07:40,400 Speaker 4: got to I've got to fill myself up with things 155 00:07:40,480 --> 00:07:42,680 Speaker 4: that bring me joy, and there is so much of that. 156 00:07:42,720 --> 00:07:44,560 Speaker 2: I've got a three year old granddaughter. 157 00:07:44,120 --> 00:07:47,720 Speaker 4: Who is the light of all of our lives and 158 00:07:47,920 --> 00:07:51,800 Speaker 4: being with her is just instant happiness. So I make 159 00:07:51,840 --> 00:07:53,640 Speaker 4: sure I spend time with her. I make sure I 160 00:07:53,680 --> 00:07:55,760 Speaker 4: do things that are creative that I love, and I 161 00:07:55,800 --> 00:07:58,640 Speaker 4: make sure that I take on work that either has 162 00:07:58,680 --> 00:08:01,800 Speaker 4: purpose and fulfills me or is how I make a living. 163 00:08:01,960 --> 00:08:04,760 Speaker 4: But there's got to be balanced. There's got to be 164 00:08:04,800 --> 00:08:07,680 Speaker 4: all the good things as well as all the necessary things. 165 00:08:07,560 --> 00:08:09,480 Speaker 1: Which is why your book also has that sausage raw 166 00:08:09,520 --> 00:08:11,320 Speaker 1: recipe that is. 167 00:08:11,240 --> 00:08:12,360 Speaker 2: One of the necessary things. 168 00:08:12,480 --> 00:08:15,480 Speaker 3: That is a necessary thing, not so necessarily the carnival 169 00:08:15,600 --> 00:08:19,760 Speaker 3: cereal you put on you early in the interview. Julie, 170 00:08:19,840 --> 00:08:21,600 Speaker 3: thank you for coming out. Thank you for being so 171 00:08:21,680 --> 00:08:24,920 Speaker 3: brave with your story. I've never heard this articulated as 172 00:08:24,920 --> 00:08:26,520 Speaker 3: well as you've just done it just there. 173 00:08:26,600 --> 00:08:27,360 Speaker 2: Thank you so much. 174 00:08:27,680 --> 00:08:30,520 Speaker 3: The memoir is out now at all good bookstores near you. 175 00:08:30,600 --> 00:08:32,760 Speaker 2: Julie Goodwin, thank you, Thank you very much.