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Speaker 1: Mom always always said be careful. Love those alum boys.

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Speaker 2: It'll well use your head. They will tear you up

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Speaker 2: like a paper tour. Oh no no no, yeah.

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Speaker 1: Yeah yeah yeah, oh no no no, then the smallage

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Speaker 1: you darling. Anyway, it's a liful foughts that'll bring you

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Speaker 1: down shot to get your tipsy like God drinks love

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Speaker 1: drunk girls.

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Speaker 2: Hi, I'm Amanda and I'm Rumby.

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Speaker 3: Welcome to It's Layer.

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Speaker 4: We're in a long distance friendship that started over twenty

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Speaker 4: years ago when we were in high school.

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Speaker 5: We'll be talking about all things life, love, family, anything

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Speaker 5: and everything else under the sun.

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Speaker 4: That's deeper with us because in life, you know, Jine

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Speaker 4: malayas Aka, it's layers.

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Speaker 3: Don't stack. Don't stack that la, especially this toopick. Oh

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Speaker 3: my lord, how are you doing? Mellow?

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Speaker 2: I don't know if I'm ready for this topic. Let

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Speaker 2: me just.

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Speaker 5: I'm gonna be coming. We're gonna be coming for people.

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Speaker 5: Shots are gonna be sied.

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Speaker 2: Is why I come from people? Guys, Please don't come

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Speaker 2: for me. It was a Landa who said I'm coming

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Speaker 2: for anyone. It was not me.

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Speaker 4: This is a lot of You's an Amanda.

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Speaker 5: You cannot you cannot talk about calorism shots being fined.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's also true. Don't you think it's complicated? It's

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Speaker 2: less okay, what tolorism? Let us let the people want

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Speaker 2: to know if they don't.

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Speaker 3: Definitely, the dictionary definition of colorism.

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Speaker 5: Would be pretty just against people are depending on their

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Speaker 5: skin tones with blacker or lighter within the same racial group.

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Speaker 3: Understand, are we on the same.

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Speaker 2: Matter? Did not come to play? She's like, I'm a

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Speaker 2: school you per day, Like.

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Speaker 3: What do you think?

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Speaker 5: What do you what's your definition? You can give the

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Speaker 5: colloquial one, since I gave that.

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Speaker 4: Colorism is I'm better than you because you look because

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Speaker 4: of my my skin tone is X compared to yours,

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Speaker 4: or just some sort of she said, prejudice, judgment, like

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Speaker 4: you're better than or less than someone because of what

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Speaker 4: your skin looks like. So you're beautiful because you have

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Speaker 4: this kind of skin tone, or oh you're not that

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Speaker 4: great because you have that skin tone.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's what I was.

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Speaker 5: I read somewhere where it was like, colorism is racism

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Speaker 5: Racism's daughter.

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Speaker 4: Iresent fully fully, when did you first like experience colorism,

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Speaker 4: like in your.

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Speaker 5: That's such a good question, I I I think I.

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Speaker 3: Experienced it before I knew what it was.

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Speaker 5: Yes, same, so definitely like being told that I was

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Speaker 5: lighter than my brother's and that.

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Speaker 3: Was a good thing. My mom, my mom, my mom,

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Speaker 3: and my mom's.

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Speaker 5: Family are light the lighter and complexion, yes, And my

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Speaker 5: dad's family they're all darker and cosion comparison to my

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Speaker 5: mom's family. So obviously it was like one of those

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Speaker 5: things where it was like, ah, he married up, like

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Speaker 5: he did well, he found light, a light skin, a light.

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Speaker 3: Skin, you know.

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Speaker 5: So then obviously when their kids come through, it's like, oh,

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Speaker 5: at least you're light, you know, because my brothers would

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Speaker 5: tended to be and my brothers were darker, and I

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Speaker 5: was like that, so it was like it was gonna happen.

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Speaker 5: That's the way it should happen, Like it always should

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Speaker 5: be dark and the girl should be light. So I

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Speaker 5: think those comments coming through were like heavily ingrained, like

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Speaker 5: I actually remember this one time, and funny enough, not

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Speaker 5: even from my mom's side, but my dad's side were.

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Speaker 3: More the perpetuators of it, because they would be like, oh,

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Speaker 3: wear a hat or you know, take care of your skin.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, and I'm like, and then my brothers didn't have

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Speaker 5: to because they're dark anyway, you know. And I didn't

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Speaker 5: notice because I was a girl off it was because

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Speaker 5: I didn't actually experience without really realizing what it was.

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Speaker 2: And for you, ah, yeah, thousand percent. I've also broke

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Speaker 2: us up in previous episodes. I think it was growing up.

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Speaker 2: My sister is life and complexion than I am too, so.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, just the way family related to her, and I'm

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Speaker 4: probably not like the nuclear family. It's like extended family,

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Speaker 4: like oh she's so pretty, or like comments about her.

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Speaker 2: Beauty like versus mine, or like you know what I mean,

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Speaker 2: very very whopped.

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Speaker 4: Uh yeah, that's like literally from them, and it's like,

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Speaker 4: oh you should it could be wear a hat, or

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Speaker 4: you shouldn't be out in the sun or waba. If

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Speaker 4: you're not careful, you'll get darker things like that. Which

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Speaker 4: so absolutely my family that was colorist for sure, like

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Speaker 4: in in some way, shape or form, or whether some

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Speaker 4: family members were fairer in complexion. Automatically they're more beautiful,

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Speaker 4: and it's like more and you also see it's also

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Speaker 4: an unspoken like some of the things aren't unsaid. It's

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Speaker 4: how people relate to someone who's who was fairer or

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Speaker 4: how they would you know, attention or treat them, whereas

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Speaker 4: or conversely sideline you if you're darker.

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Speaker 2: Yeah I could go on.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah, so you definitely felt like your family were colorist?

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Speaker 2: Yes, yes, yeah, absolutely? Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Do you know you your software are over?

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Speaker 2: For sure?

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Speaker 4: I think you start, you know, start thinking like, oh

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Speaker 4: what can.

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Speaker 2: Like it's not am I not bathing enough? You know

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Speaker 2: what I mean? Like do I need to scrub a

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Speaker 2: little harder? But the stun too long?

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Speaker 4: You know, things like that. And there's this photo of mine.

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Speaker 4: I think you've shared it on the is laid Instagram

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Speaker 4: when I was a kid at bangs and like wearing

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Speaker 4: like a school T shirt with my main badge on,

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Speaker 4: and I was looking and I think I've shown people

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Speaker 4: photos of them. They're like, that's not huge for me,

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Speaker 4: and I was like, yeah, that's legit with me as

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Speaker 4: a child, because you know.

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Speaker 2: Obviously as you grow you grew all that stuff.

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Speaker 4: But I think I've definitely had elements of colorism, Like

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Speaker 4: you know, whether it's like being attracted to someone because

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Speaker 4: maybe they're fair and complexion because that is deemed better,

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Speaker 4: or if someone who is fair and complexion winked your way.

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Speaker 2: It's like you've got to feel privileged.

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Speaker 4: Because like, I'm a dark girl, I'm a darks like

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Speaker 4: we grew up the era before it was fly to

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Speaker 4: be dark skinned. By the way, I don't know our

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Speaker 4: age for aging yourself, but yeah, so definitely and.

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Speaker 5: For you, definitely as I am. My family definitely are.

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Speaker 5: I don't think they're really realized that. I think anyway.

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Speaker 3: I think they're complementing you.

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Speaker 5: Yes, so obviously I'm probably on the other scale, was

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Speaker 5: like lighter toned, So it was like at least at

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Speaker 5: least at least so that they're pushing that idea that

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Speaker 5: you're better, you're better and.

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Speaker 3: Better, you know why you're like, am I am? I

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Speaker 3: really like?

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Speaker 5: And then obviously when you see someone who's even more

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Speaker 5: lighter than you, it's like.

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Speaker 3: They're better than you.

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Speaker 5: So you got to find out that there's that scale

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Speaker 5: depending on the room you're occupying.

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Speaker 3: You know, if you're the lightest one in that room, great,

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Speaker 3: but then you could into another room and be the

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Speaker 3: darkest one yet depending So definitely my family were.

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Speaker 5: I would say I am, but I am the opposite.

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Speaker 3: Dark. I love it chocolate, I love it dark.

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Speaker 5: D black black, like that's what I But I think

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Speaker 5: I also grew up.

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Speaker 3: Around men who were like that and confident looking.

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Speaker 5: So I think I I almost thought it's funny, like

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Speaker 5: even now when I look at my family, they almost

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Speaker 5: live up to the stereotype. And the stereotyp for those

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Speaker 5: who don't know, is lighter men are like soft.

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Speaker 3: Drake drake vibes.

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Speaker 5: You know, they're gonna be singing in your ear, the

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Speaker 5: new switch notes, you know. And then the darker guys

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Speaker 5: are like rough, tough, take care of the family, you know,

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Speaker 5: put anything on their shoulders.

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Speaker 3: It's just Albert vibes, you know.

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Speaker 5: So so I think I grew up around the men

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Speaker 5: who my mom's side of the family. The men tend

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Speaker 5: to be like that in by nature, I think, or

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Speaker 5: maybe because they grew up like I don't know, But

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Speaker 5: then my dad's side does tend to do. So I

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Speaker 5: think I saw it now. I was just naturally attracted

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Speaker 5: to the so the manly man with you, so like, yeah,

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Speaker 5: I definitely think I am. And even in how I've

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Speaker 5: dated or the guys have been attracted to you.

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Speaker 3: I mean, sometimes you attract to attracted to you.

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Speaker 5: But initially when I see a guy walking typically if

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Speaker 5: he's a black.

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Speaker 3: Man, I'll have more of an appreciation for if he's

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Speaker 3: darker toll.

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Speaker 5: And maybe also now that I jump deeper on that,

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Speaker 5: it's because I want to be the lighter one.

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Speaker 2: You just opened the can of worms, right, you see.

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Speaker 3: It might be that the psychology.

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Speaker 5: We need the therapist in these episodes because I think

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Speaker 5: we're just slowing all these terms like that's not how

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Speaker 5: much that that's that's that's not what it's there for.

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Speaker 5: But like in colorism terms, I think maybe that then

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Speaker 5: I'm the fairer one, like typical to how I probably

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Speaker 5: saw my parents.

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Speaker 2: Same as.

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Speaker 4: My dad is the lighter and complexion though that's zim

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Speaker 4: sum farm life as like.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's not the topic of another day.

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Speaker 5: Now normal and access can also need to skin change exactly.

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Speaker 2: But my mom is the darker skin and my dad

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Speaker 2: is with a fair, fairer skin.

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Speaker 4: So maybe there's that play in two for me seeing

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Speaker 4: my dad because they also say psychologizing here, let's go

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Speaker 4: doctor attracted to men who are similar to your dad,

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Speaker 4: your father, like because your father is your first like

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Speaker 4: love as a as a girl, So there's also that.

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Speaker 4: So let's just psychologize everything does if we're wrong, because.

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Speaker 2: We're probably very wrong, you know, but yeah, yeah, look

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Speaker 2: at us.

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Speaker 3: I never thought about it.

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Speaker 5: I never Yeah we are because I never thought about

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Speaker 5: it that deeply. I just don't like my man told

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Speaker 5: dark and hands, Yeah that's what I like. Okay, So

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Speaker 5: even with white guys, I must say, like I love

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Speaker 5: my husband is tann like it goes for summer break

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Speaker 5: and he's like getting the ten on.

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Speaker 3: I'm like, maybe you keep it.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, I get that melan Noma will see it later

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Speaker 5: in our lives. Let us just get this like it's okay,

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Speaker 5: you know, as dark as possible. So I think, yeah,

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Speaker 5: like all of Mediterranean thing really like so even with

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Speaker 5: it even transcends into different races. I mean, of course

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Speaker 5: we will talk about the black experiences. That's what we've lived.

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Speaker 5: But like you see it with Asians, they want to

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Speaker 5: be fair as fair as fair, very white, almost translucent,

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Speaker 5: you know, and then you see like there's a car

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Speaker 5: system as well, and like so there's there's so many

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Speaker 5: other types.

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Speaker 3: But for us today, I think we're just going to

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Speaker 3: be focusing.

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Speaker 5: On our own experience. How do you see it done

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Speaker 5: or perpetuated in our everyday lives.

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Speaker 2: In every way, shape and film. I think I think

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Speaker 2: for me.

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Speaker 4: Personally, in a personal experience in dating life, I think

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Speaker 4: we've spoken about this maybe with a ball.

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Speaker 2: It's lead special lad expectations special if I'm not mistaken. However,

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Speaker 2: I see it. I saw it like you know, when

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Speaker 2: I moved.

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Speaker 4: From zim to Essay and the attention that Zim guys

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Speaker 4: started giving South African women because they're typically fairer than

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Speaker 4: Zimbabwean women, and now they have access to these women

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Speaker 4: and it's like, oh did I always think of it

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Speaker 4: like a totem pole, like the fairer at the top,

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Speaker 4: the dark at the bottom, and I happened.

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Speaker 2: To be swimming swimming with the what.

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Speaker 4: A bottom feed the fish like basically, so I saw

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Speaker 4: it in that way. I saw it in like when

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Speaker 4: I started getting grooming myself.

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Speaker 2: I guess, you know, you.

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Speaker 4: Take care of yourself and the watsuka manji like, oh

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Speaker 4: now you're a fair like you've gotten lighter, and it's

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Speaker 4: like an accomplishment of some sort and they're not gears

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Speaker 4: like you bought and you're like, I've been bathing, but

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Speaker 4: hey whatever, I.

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Speaker 2: Just didn't have the right creams for.

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Speaker 4: My skin when I was what ye, I don't know,

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Speaker 4: generic generic exactly. So in that way too, just like

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Speaker 4: how automatically people see someone fairer, it's like, oh beautiful.

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Speaker 2: But now I'm also seeing it.

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Speaker 4: Speaking of reverse psychology again being used in the wrong context. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: obviously being in a very white space now where I live,

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Speaker 4: it's almost the opposite. It's like, well, your skin is beautiful,

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Speaker 4: like you know, I even as a student saying.

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Speaker 2: Oh, I wish I could have your skin, But like they.

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Speaker 5: Want to, do you think if you had like another

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Speaker 5: black woman there who was fairer than you, Yes, I

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Speaker 5: don't know how that would you think there'll be a

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Speaker 5: relation or biracial I think.

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Speaker 4: They would seem as like she's the true Africa, you

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Speaker 4: know what I mean, if that makes sense.

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Speaker 2: So it becomes the intrigue.

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Speaker 4: Isn't the more different because here you do get more

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Speaker 4: biracial people like they you know, around, but like a

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Speaker 4: typical like black African woman, it's not that often. So

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Speaker 4: there's that also fascination and like ooh black, real black,

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Speaker 4: you know what I mean, Even on days when you're

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Speaker 4: like you feel like crap, like oh it looks beautiful

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Speaker 4: and you're like, no this I don't know.

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Speaker 2: You guys maybe don't really see but I don't know.

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Speaker 4: I feel like it is in everything celebrity culture to

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Speaker 4: for a long time was about the fair and the

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Speaker 4: better and so on and so forth. But I could

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Speaker 4: go on for you, how do how does it play out?

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Speaker 4: And maybe in Australia like two for you, how do

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Speaker 4: you see that?

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Speaker 3: Well?

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Speaker 5: Different to tag gone to your last comment about celebrity culture,

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Speaker 5: I think it still is because even though we're seeing

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Speaker 5: more darker women like you've want og or sarray types,

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Speaker 5: there's sometimes even the storyline you're given, yes, is like they're.

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Speaker 3: Still struggling, Yes, still in the depths.

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Speaker 5: Of you know, and then the biracial, worn, lighter skinned

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Speaker 5: girl has it together. They're from a wealthier family, they're

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Speaker 5: from you know, even wondering.

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Speaker 2: She's talking about Harlem. If you haven't won, yes, yes, Amazon.

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Speaker 5: So yes, so even the problems you're given are of

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Speaker 5: a different nature.

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Speaker 3: So but you're not winning.

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Speaker 4: Don't you think it's because maybe because of colorism, the

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Speaker 4: fair skinned offered more opportunities even in society as a whole.

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Speaker 2: Do you understand what I'm saying? Like people I understand.

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Speaker 3: But with film there's there should be a bit of variety.

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Speaker 5: Yes, I get you know, you can't have Empire giving

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Speaker 5: us the same line then Insecure all giving us because

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Speaker 5: even Tiffany was like, it's like, all I'm trying to

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Speaker 5: say is even if that's even if they think that's

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Speaker 5: the affection of reality, it's okay in movies and film.

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Speaker 3: To do it different. Yes, you know you can.

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Speaker 5: You can blindcast like they did for Bridgitton. They didn't

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Speaker 5: have if you're the best person for that role, you

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Speaker 5: got that role. So it's not like we have to

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Speaker 5: play into these tropes all the time.

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Speaker 3: And yeah, I maye.

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Speaker 5: People do it because they think it's authentic, but sometimes

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Speaker 5: it gets tiring.

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Speaker 2: It's like I give a black girl, yeah, yeah, I want.

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Speaker 3: To see a black girl.

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Speaker 5: Not every show should do it, like you know, let's

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Speaker 5: let's also have black girls being the one who's who

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Speaker 5: has a nice apartment and then the fair skin is

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Speaker 5: coming to stay in.

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Speaker 4: My Yes, yes, I will say to be Ione was thriving.

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Speaker 4: We will give her career side.

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Speaker 3: Definitely she was, Yeah, which actually finds funny enough.

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Speaker 5: I was going to actually ask you if you think

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Speaker 5: it transcends into romantic relationships because, as you said, you've

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Speaker 5: won Molly or non insecure and a very thriving career,

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Speaker 5: find herself whatever she wanted.

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Speaker 3: And had all that, but her love life took a while.

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Speaker 2: Yes, I think it does.

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Speaker 4: I think we've also been coined like angry black women

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Speaker 4: for the most part, so I feel like the blacker

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Speaker 4: you are, maybe it's like, oh, that's going to be

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Speaker 4: the angry black woman, and then the fairer you are,

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Speaker 4: you're closer to I don't know, white, so less anger.

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Speaker 2: I don't know what it is. Maybe someone can.

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Speaker 4: Express it, but I've I've felt it, and.

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Speaker 2: It's weird.

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Speaker 4: It's hard to put it in words because it's not

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Speaker 4: a sad thing. It's like it's in subtlety. It's in

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Speaker 4: the way someone relates to you versus when they're you know,

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Speaker 4: hitting on someone who's fairer skinned, and that jump and

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Speaker 4: I in.

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Speaker 2: Some such ways, I was like I'm flying and this

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Speaker 2: so cold person.

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Speaker 4: But yeah, eyes, it was like she's it because it's

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Speaker 4: that that's the girl, you know.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, And I think we've seen it even.

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Speaker 4: With celebrities, how when they sort of terminate their first

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Speaker 4: marriage to their high school sweetheart who maybe it have

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Speaker 4: been a dark skinned girl. Typically when then they succeed

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Speaker 4: and thrive and then they go with someone who's fair

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Speaker 4: skinned people heaven, Hearts of the world, you know, ludicris

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Speaker 4: of the world, like it happens.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but yeah, I don't know, how do you? How

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Speaker 2: does it played out for you? Yeah?

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Speaker 5: Definitely, Like I mean, of course, I explained try to

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Speaker 5: psychologize my own self by saying I like darker guys.

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Speaker 5: But I think it's also like a status symbol, yes,

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Speaker 5: and closer you are too white, Yes, the most successful

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Speaker 5: you're perceived to be, which is why I also have

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Speaker 5: a problem with these Hollywood storylines because it's just pushing

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Speaker 5: that narrative as well.

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Speaker 3: And why you're you You've told me about the new show.

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Speaker 5: Coming out, bel Air that's going to have a dark

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Speaker 5: skinned family and replacing Will and all them reacting rebooting

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Speaker 5: that series of the darker, darker, darker skinned family, so

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Speaker 5: obviously like it's it's just yeah, I think it's people

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Speaker 5: didn't think I've made it, Like, yeah, you guys, like

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Speaker 5: I can get her, I can get a biracial girl,

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Speaker 5: or I can get a lighter skinned girl. I've made

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Speaker 5: it and then also it's better for the next generation

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Speaker 5: to be you know, which is something we probably want

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Speaker 5: to put opinion and also discuss when we talk about

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Speaker 5: interracial dating, because that's what's another thing, because it's like,

364
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Speaker 5: when you are internationally dating, are you subconsciously trying to

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Speaker 5: also push this agenda that you're better in your life but.

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Speaker 2: Going there.

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Speaker 5: Last so literally, it's so it's so tough. I think

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Speaker 5: for me personally when it comes to romantic relationships, if

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Speaker 5: you have a sole preference, yes, of lighter skinned or

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Speaker 5: darker skinned, then I think.

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Speaker 3: That's that is a bit colorist.

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Speaker 5: But if you're like, oh, you know, sometimes I date

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Speaker 5: darker sometimes there's a personality for.

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Speaker 3: Me, then that's slightly different.

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Speaker 5: Like yeah, maybe you might notice one side, But then

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Speaker 5: when you actually do find out like a bit more

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Speaker 5: about them and you get attracted to them, are you

378
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Speaker 5: finding that you're shutting the door on one side and

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Speaker 5: only into one then that is when it becomes a

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Speaker 5: bit problematic because but.

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Speaker 2: It's my preference. It's my preference a man, that's my preference.

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Speaker 5: And they almost use that word very loosely as an excuse,

383
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Speaker 5: and they need to like really dig because yeah, sometimes

384
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Speaker 5: when people are confronted by that. But like what you know,

385
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Speaker 5: we see a trend. Yeah, in your preference, what what

386
00:22:06,560 --> 00:22:09,760
Speaker 5: what makes you prefer or why do you prefer? And

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Speaker 5: if the reasons are just you know, not really personality based.

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Speaker 3: Then you to yourself a bit more I reckon for sure.

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Speaker 2: But do you think that fair skin in itself is

390
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Speaker 2: actually attractive? Like is that the thing? I don't know,

391
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Speaker 2: like is that for me? I think I'm sorry, go

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Speaker 2: for it, go for it, go for it.

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Speaker 5: I was gonna say, I think when you're looking at

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Speaker 5: other races looking at us, yes, they do, you think

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Speaker 5: so because it tends to be more eurocentric. I think

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Speaker 5: it's like less scary, more palatable, you know, like you're not.

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Speaker 3: You're not so different from us. You're honest likely that

398
00:22:52,400 --> 00:22:54,800
Speaker 3: you know, you're not that dark, you know what I mean?

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Speaker 3: Like I find I mean.

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Speaker 5: Obviously this goes into also affectish if you do like

401
00:22:59,720 --> 00:23:03,639
Speaker 5: this really like, but like I do think generally and

402
00:23:03,720 --> 00:23:08,720
Speaker 5: maybe because especially if it's biracial fairness or you know

403
00:23:08,760 --> 00:23:12,560
Speaker 5: there's maybe the third generation from someone having been biracial

404
00:23:12,560 --> 00:23:16,200
Speaker 5: in your family, I do think there's like a kinship

405
00:23:16,440 --> 00:23:18,919
Speaker 5: that comes, like you know, you're black, but you're not

406
00:23:19,040 --> 00:23:25,240
Speaker 5: black black, you know. So, so I do think a

407
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Speaker 5: lot of the stuff we push on each other within

408
00:23:27,640 --> 00:23:31,320
Speaker 5: the black community also comes from outside the community.

409
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Speaker 4: Yes, and I think too though, like from within the community,

410
00:23:34,720 --> 00:23:37,560
Speaker 4: there's a level of fascination with the features of like

411
00:23:38,160 --> 00:23:44,560
Speaker 4: a more fairer personal or mixed race person compared to

412
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Speaker 4: your black because black is all we know and see.

413
00:23:47,960 --> 00:23:50,800
Speaker 4: Similar to how I'm saying here, like I'm different because

414
00:23:50,920 --> 00:23:54,200
Speaker 4: white is all they see mostly see white and Asian

415
00:23:54,280 --> 00:23:57,880
Speaker 4: a little, you know, but whereas black homes like black

416
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Speaker 4: as all we know. This is a little different and

417
00:24:00,080 --> 00:24:02,200
Speaker 4: they kind of look black, but then they something that

418
00:24:02,520 --> 00:24:03,120
Speaker 4: you know what I mean.

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Speaker 3: So there's also that exotic.

420
00:24:05,520 --> 00:24:09,320
Speaker 4: Exoticism type of thing that plays into that. But I

421
00:24:09,359 --> 00:24:12,200
Speaker 4: think it's right, very very interesting perspective you put there,

422
00:24:12,359 --> 00:24:14,960
Speaker 4: like I hadn't thought about, which is that you're closer

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Speaker 4: to us, say.

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00:24:16,359 --> 00:24:20,560
Speaker 5: So, yeah, especially like in America where they're like being

425
00:24:20,640 --> 00:24:24,639
Speaker 5: so mixed over yeah, left Africa, because then you like

426
00:24:24,680 --> 00:24:27,439
Speaker 5: you get the ones who are black technically, but then

427
00:24:27,480 --> 00:24:31,199
Speaker 5: they maybe have green eyes. Yes, So it's like it

428
00:24:31,320 --> 00:24:36,399
Speaker 5: makes it a bit more unique, Like, yeah, we're pretty

429
00:24:36,440 --> 00:24:40,399
Speaker 5: much stock standard right, dark skin, dark eyes, and I

430
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Speaker 5: think even on saying this to my husband the other day,

431
00:24:42,400 --> 00:24:42,720
Speaker 5: when we.

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Speaker 3: Describe each other, we don't really use our eyes. We

433
00:24:44,840 --> 00:24:46,200
Speaker 3: don't think she's got green eyes.

434
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Speaker 5: Yes, you know, unless your eyes are very distinctive. We

435
00:24:50,760 --> 00:24:53,680
Speaker 5: don't really go for the color because that's something that's

436
00:24:53,720 --> 00:24:54,800
Speaker 5: like stock standard.

437
00:24:55,080 --> 00:24:57,480
Speaker 2: Yes, exactly, you're right.

438
00:24:57,560 --> 00:25:02,719
Speaker 4: So so, but what about this fetishization almost now that

439
00:25:02,760 --> 00:25:05,399
Speaker 4: we're moving into an era of very dumb you know,

440
00:25:07,200 --> 00:25:13,840
Speaker 4: fetishization as a time twister, fetishization of very dark skin.

441
00:25:13,960 --> 00:25:16,960
Speaker 4: We just saw like recently the British Folk cover was

442
00:25:17,040 --> 00:25:23,800
Speaker 4: released with dark skinned black models on it.

443
00:25:24,520 --> 00:25:26,520
Speaker 2: You know, we can go into.

444
00:25:26,320 --> 00:25:31,160
Speaker 4: That, but yeah, how do you feel, especially you being

445
00:25:31,560 --> 00:25:38,760
Speaker 4: working in you know, fashion styling industry and that kind of.

446
00:25:40,680 --> 00:25:43,080
Speaker 5: I mean not to take away from that cover in

447
00:25:43,200 --> 00:25:46,879
Speaker 5: terms of what they were trying to achieve. And it's

448
00:25:46,960 --> 00:25:49,640
Speaker 5: nice to see black people on a covert love like that.

449
00:25:50,280 --> 00:25:52,240
Speaker 5: It's like, thank you for putting us on the cover.

450
00:25:52,440 --> 00:25:56,200
Speaker 5: But yeah, like isn's.

451
00:25:55,800 --> 00:26:00,719
Speaker 3: Think it's almost like you can't have any shade in between.

452
00:26:00,880 --> 00:26:05,000
Speaker 5: It's like you're either that or you're biracial or slightly

453
00:26:05,160 --> 00:26:07,960
Speaker 5: like just light skin, but all the other shades beautiful

454
00:26:07,960 --> 00:26:11,480
Speaker 5: shades of brown that are in between are like sometimes

455
00:26:11,520 --> 00:26:15,000
Speaker 5: completely no, yeah, they don't matter. And I think that

456
00:26:15,119 --> 00:26:19,480
Speaker 5: cover just made it, like they said it was at

457
00:26:19,560 --> 00:26:22,840
Speaker 5: that it just came across a little bit insounting because

458
00:26:22,840 --> 00:26:23,320
Speaker 5: it was like.

459
00:26:23,400 --> 00:26:26,360
Speaker 3: They were really wigs. They were very like stock standard

460
00:26:26,400 --> 00:26:26,800
Speaker 3: and old.

461
00:26:26,880 --> 00:26:30,359
Speaker 2: Look like birds nests, that's what those look like.

462
00:26:30,440 --> 00:26:31,360
Speaker 3: I don't know, Like.

463
00:26:33,080 --> 00:26:35,119
Speaker 5: For those of you who don't know what we're talking about,

464
00:26:35,160 --> 00:26:39,560
Speaker 5: definitely check Vogue British Fogue, and there's a there's a

465
00:26:39,640 --> 00:26:43,520
Speaker 5: cover of like five or six Sudanese, mainly Sudanese. I

466
00:26:43,520 --> 00:26:45,720
Speaker 5: think they're also some of them like one Days and

467
00:26:46,200 --> 00:26:49,200
Speaker 5: yeah models, they're going to be the next it faces

468
00:26:49,359 --> 00:26:53,760
Speaker 5: of fast modeling, right. But then the funny thing is

469
00:26:54,040 --> 00:26:57,280
Speaker 5: you can walk away from that cover not remembering one

470
00:26:57,720 --> 00:27:02,399
Speaker 5: face or one because the lighting was so bad. The

471
00:27:04,560 --> 00:27:06,760
Speaker 5: it was just like white almost like is it a

472
00:27:06,800 --> 00:27:08,360
Speaker 5: whitewashing or blackwashed?

473
00:27:08,440 --> 00:27:10,200
Speaker 3: Like it was like they.

474
00:27:10,119 --> 00:27:13,320
Speaker 2: Look like, yeah, he was playing and blue black they had.

475
00:27:13,560 --> 00:27:17,000
Speaker 5: Yeah, they had no they look like leather, very leathery,

476
00:27:17,480 --> 00:27:18,640
Speaker 5: and there's no distinction.

477
00:27:18,920 --> 00:27:20,000
Speaker 3: We were meant to be.

478
00:27:19,960 --> 00:27:23,440
Speaker 5: Elevating these voices so they get visibility and we remember

479
00:27:23,520 --> 00:27:27,159
Speaker 5: them and we notice them. But like if you pointed

480
00:27:27,200 --> 00:27:29,399
Speaker 5: out as South Sudanese model and said she was on

481
00:27:29,400 --> 00:27:31,280
Speaker 5: one of them on the cover, I'll just be like, oh, okay,

482
00:27:32,040 --> 00:27:36,160
Speaker 5: because I really didn't distinctly remember any of them.

483
00:27:36,280 --> 00:27:39,879
Speaker 4: They almost I remember like looking and having to like

484
00:27:40,000 --> 00:27:43,040
Speaker 4: certain I was like, who's who am I looking for?

485
00:27:43,119 --> 00:27:46,560
Speaker 2: It like it was very yeah.

486
00:27:47,359 --> 00:27:50,919
Speaker 5: Yeah, and the modeling industry, fashion industry has had a

487
00:27:51,000 --> 00:27:54,680
Speaker 5: huge problem with doing this, exploiting our very dark girls

488
00:27:54,800 --> 00:27:57,639
Speaker 5: anyway to begin with, almost like you're a puppet in

489
00:27:57,680 --> 00:28:01,240
Speaker 5: a show, not necessarily for beauty she but just for oh,

490
00:28:01,320 --> 00:28:02,240
Speaker 5: she's really different.

491
00:28:02,480 --> 00:28:06,480
Speaker 4: Yes, it's almost shock factor they want to yeah, exactly.

492
00:28:06,480 --> 00:28:09,000
Speaker 5: They do this without binos as well, where they're like, oh,

493
00:28:09,200 --> 00:28:11,680
Speaker 5: you know, it's weird, you know, but it's like it's

494
00:28:11,720 --> 00:28:13,480
Speaker 5: not celebrating in a beautiful way.

495
00:28:13,640 --> 00:28:17,080
Speaker 2: Yes, I'm with you, and I agree, and I agree.

496
00:28:17,359 --> 00:28:20,600
Speaker 4: For me, it's like, why can't we see like a

497
00:28:20,600 --> 00:28:25,840
Speaker 4: fenty beauty range of like black, yes, and colored people

498
00:28:26,000 --> 00:28:30,359
Speaker 4: like in in everything, people who look like me. And

499
00:28:30,400 --> 00:28:34,240
Speaker 4: I think we've spoken ample times about us loving the

500
00:28:34,359 --> 00:28:38,320
Speaker 4: likes of Gabrielle Union, of Kelly Rowlands, of the.

501
00:28:38,320 --> 00:28:41,440
Speaker 2: Riot destinies who are dark skinned girls.

502
00:28:41,600 --> 00:28:45,520
Speaker 4: But like, you know, it's like this this shade actually

503
00:28:45,640 --> 00:28:50,320
Speaker 4: Blaine like all you know, So I'm with you, and

504
00:28:50,400 --> 00:28:53,880
Speaker 4: I think maybe this is the extremes we have to

505
00:28:53,920 --> 00:28:56,280
Speaker 4: come to to eventually come to an understanding.

506
00:28:56,320 --> 00:28:57,240
Speaker 2: But we also had.

507
00:28:57,120 --> 00:29:00,479
Speaker 4: Alec Weck you know, from years and years ago, and

508
00:29:00,520 --> 00:29:04,440
Speaker 4: we you know, still not getting to the point, you know.

509
00:29:05,280 --> 00:29:08,680
Speaker 2: But yeah, by the way, Kitty Roland is looking deliciously

510
00:29:08,960 --> 00:29:10,200
Speaker 2: like that skin.

511
00:29:10,200 --> 00:29:12,720
Speaker 3: Girl girl girl.

512
00:29:14,080 --> 00:29:17,800
Speaker 5: But I mean yet last episode, we spoke on comparison

513
00:29:17,960 --> 00:29:21,680
Speaker 5: culture and like, do you feel in amongst your friends

514
00:29:22,320 --> 00:29:25,920
Speaker 5: when it comes to colorism, Yes, that you compare yourselves

515
00:29:25,960 --> 00:29:28,080
Speaker 5: to each other. Like do you think any of your

516
00:29:28,080 --> 00:29:31,240
Speaker 5: friends think, oh, I'm hotter than or would get shocked

517
00:29:31,280 --> 00:29:33,440
Speaker 5: if a guy approached you first store?

518
00:29:33,720 --> 00:29:33,880
Speaker 6: Yes?

519
00:29:34,040 --> 00:29:36,200
Speaker 3: Would, like you know what I mean, Like, do you

520
00:29:36,240 --> 00:29:36,560
Speaker 3: reckon this?

521
00:29:36,760 --> 00:29:39,960
Speaker 2: It's happened to Paris and we were fallous. Hm hmmm

522
00:29:40,400 --> 00:29:41,360
Speaker 2: before weird.

523
00:29:42,040 --> 00:29:45,000
Speaker 4: But I don't know about my friends so much thinking

524
00:29:45,000 --> 00:29:50,280
Speaker 4: oh I'm hot I think too. I happen to have

525
00:29:50,520 --> 00:29:52,880
Speaker 4: for the most part friends who are very like real

526
00:29:52,960 --> 00:29:58,760
Speaker 4: talk like very you know about it, but I think

527
00:29:58,760 --> 00:30:01,600
Speaker 4: it definitely can happen and in subtle ways, especially when

528
00:30:01,640 --> 00:30:02,240
Speaker 4: you're dating.

529
00:30:02,320 --> 00:30:03,760
Speaker 2: You're dating as the pits.

530
00:30:04,360 --> 00:30:06,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, because you said you've had a family.

531
00:30:06,520 --> 00:30:11,120
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, dating is the pits. Like yeah, it's just

532
00:30:11,160 --> 00:30:13,000
Speaker 4: like how can they talking to you? Why is he

533
00:30:13,080 --> 00:30:15,600
Speaker 4: talking to you? Like, oh, you should be happy? He's

534
00:30:15,640 --> 00:30:19,920
Speaker 4: talking to you like strange comments like that, and you're like, bro,

535
00:30:20,200 --> 00:30:20,880
Speaker 4: he should be happy.

536
00:30:20,880 --> 00:30:22,960
Speaker 2: He's talking to me like full stop.

537
00:30:24,560 --> 00:30:25,440
Speaker 3: Yeah for sure.

538
00:30:25,520 --> 00:30:28,280
Speaker 2: But yeah, I think that it is there.

539
00:30:28,360 --> 00:30:32,959
Speaker 4: There's definitely an element of it that can come, maybe unintentionally.

540
00:30:33,200 --> 00:30:37,320
Speaker 4: Have you ever watched that movie called the I don't

541
00:30:37,320 --> 00:30:39,280
Speaker 4: know what word they use, the basically how in the

542
00:30:39,320 --> 00:30:42,840
Speaker 4: friendship group there's always the like ugly friend who.

543
00:30:45,480 --> 00:30:47,720
Speaker 3: She's either ugly or she's a bit bigger.

544
00:30:47,520 --> 00:30:51,400
Speaker 2: Ye who makes that others feel good? I was very hurt.

545
00:30:51,760 --> 00:30:54,400
Speaker 4: I was like like.

546
00:30:54,240 --> 00:30:55,000
Speaker 2: Why are we doing this?

547
00:30:56,600 --> 00:30:59,600
Speaker 4: But I could I've noticed it in some friendship groups.

548
00:31:00,400 --> 00:31:04,080
Speaker 4: Maybe it's subconsciously, maybe they just love the person's personality,

549
00:31:04,280 --> 00:31:05,640
Speaker 4: but I don't know.

550
00:31:05,720 --> 00:31:07,000
Speaker 2: Do you feel it happens?

551
00:31:07,560 --> 00:31:07,760
Speaker 4: Oh?

552
00:31:07,880 --> 00:31:10,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, for sure, for sure.

553
00:31:11,040 --> 00:31:14,560
Speaker 5: Especially I think I mean, no, not not so much

554
00:31:14,560 --> 00:31:17,280
Speaker 5: in my thirties, because I have a set group of friends.

555
00:31:17,920 --> 00:31:19,800
Speaker 3: I obviously I've been through things.

556
00:31:19,840 --> 00:31:22,160
Speaker 5: With having said that, though, in my set group of friends,

557
00:31:22,200 --> 00:31:26,200
Speaker 5: I do have boys who prefer lighter skin growth and

558
00:31:26,240 --> 00:31:29,240
Speaker 5: are very very open to telling you that they're like

559
00:31:29,320 --> 00:31:35,440
Speaker 5: them a yellow boned. So that's interesting because it's like, okay,

560
00:31:37,000 --> 00:31:39,560
Speaker 5: but I think it's it's a journey that they also

561
00:31:39,600 --> 00:31:42,000
Speaker 5: need to do within themselves because that's what they've also

562
00:31:42,040 --> 00:31:45,720
Speaker 5: been told it's beautiful, and it ties into other things

563
00:31:45,720 --> 00:31:46,560
Speaker 5: as well, like hair.

564
00:31:46,640 --> 00:31:48,840
Speaker 3: They expect the girls to also have weeds instead of.

565
00:31:49,120 --> 00:31:52,040
Speaker 5: Graides, and so it's like a lot of status building

566
00:31:52,080 --> 00:31:55,920
Speaker 5: things that we've put up in our community, and obviously

567
00:31:55,960 --> 00:31:59,840
Speaker 5: colorism comes into it, you know, yes, and amongst like

568
00:32:00,160 --> 00:32:04,480
Speaker 5: boys approaching me definitely, especially on a night out, when

569
00:32:04,520 --> 00:32:08,440
Speaker 5: you get a guy who's like maybe lighter skinned or

570
00:32:08,480 --> 00:32:11,000
Speaker 5: maybe the cute guy in whose group and then he approaches,

571
00:32:11,520 --> 00:32:14,000
Speaker 5: maybe that's when you start to realize that we compare

572
00:32:14,040 --> 00:32:18,480
Speaker 5: ourselves and we rank ourselves with peers, because you get

573
00:32:18,480 --> 00:32:20,160
Speaker 5: people will be like, why is it talking to you?

574
00:32:20,200 --> 00:32:22,320
Speaker 5: Like what you just said, and you're like, but why not?

575
00:32:22,520 --> 00:32:25,160
Speaker 5: Like do you think I'm less than you? Like that's

576
00:32:25,200 --> 00:32:28,160
Speaker 5: literally what you're trying to say, right, Although it'll be

577
00:32:28,200 --> 00:32:30,280
Speaker 5: like there'll be the ah. They'll pull you aside, like

578
00:32:30,320 --> 00:32:33,360
Speaker 5: sespecaking in high school, like really unique, Oh, so what's

579
00:32:33,360 --> 00:32:37,600
Speaker 5: going wrong with you? And you know, oh okay, So

580
00:32:37,760 --> 00:32:40,600
Speaker 5: you don't expect that I would just be approached by

581
00:32:40,640 --> 00:32:41,080
Speaker 5: this guy.

582
00:32:41,200 --> 00:32:43,960
Speaker 3: You expect that there's some story or how do you

583
00:32:44,080 --> 00:32:46,600
Speaker 3: know him? Or so, especially as.

584
00:32:46,440 --> 00:32:48,760
Speaker 5: We've talked about our dating in high school was really

585
00:32:48,800 --> 00:32:53,640
Speaker 5: like that. So like at those times as well, when

586
00:32:53,640 --> 00:32:55,880
Speaker 5: you finally get a guy who's cute and talking to you,

587
00:32:56,360 --> 00:33:00,000
Speaker 5: it almost felt like why. And for me it's quite

588
00:33:00,160 --> 00:33:03,000
Speaker 5: funny because obviously I go home maybe like what every

589
00:33:03,040 --> 00:33:06,240
Speaker 5: two years, and when I was single, you go home

590
00:33:06,280 --> 00:33:07,680
Speaker 5: and you're ready to mingle and.

591
00:33:08,240 --> 00:33:10,600
Speaker 3: Meet up with people. But then people are still stuck

592
00:33:10,640 --> 00:33:12,440
Speaker 3: in that high school mentality.

593
00:33:13,040 --> 00:33:16,120
Speaker 5: But then they'll be like and obviously I personally think

594
00:33:16,160 --> 00:33:17,080
Speaker 5: I've had a glow up.

595
00:33:17,360 --> 00:33:18,720
Speaker 3: So then they're like not.

596
00:33:20,240 --> 00:33:25,240
Speaker 5: Computing, not computing, like but we remember you like this.

597
00:33:25,560 --> 00:33:27,720
Speaker 5: And then now the hot guy who used to be

598
00:33:27,760 --> 00:33:30,520
Speaker 5: hot in high school, who's still hot, now, why is

599
00:33:30,520 --> 00:33:31,440
Speaker 5: he talking.

600
00:33:31,240 --> 00:33:33,960
Speaker 3: To you to think of you?

601
00:33:34,080 --> 00:33:39,240
Speaker 5: Like It's like it ties in comparison and ties in colorism.

602
00:33:40,000 --> 00:33:44,240
Speaker 4: Girl, You just like things just started, probably like memory

603
00:33:44,360 --> 00:33:48,520
Speaker 4: is literally, like when you're like, oh, who's the guy

604
00:33:48,600 --> 00:33:51,200
Speaker 4: like you met up with whatever, and you show like, oh,

605
00:33:51,320 --> 00:33:55,120
Speaker 4: he's cute, and you're like yeah, it's not like oh

606
00:33:55,120 --> 00:33:59,320
Speaker 4: he's so cute girl, it's like, oh, like for you,

607
00:33:59,400 --> 00:33:59,920
Speaker 4: he's cute?

608
00:34:00,080 --> 00:34:00,440
Speaker 2: Are you?

609
00:34:00,480 --> 00:34:02,000
Speaker 3: How did you get him? Yeah?

610
00:34:02,120 --> 00:34:02,680
Speaker 2: How did you?

611
00:34:02,720 --> 00:34:05,280
Speaker 4: And I'm like, Okay, I don't know how I'm supposed

612
00:34:05,280 --> 00:34:08,280
Speaker 4: to feel about this, but yeah, it's true.

613
00:34:08,320 --> 00:34:10,640
Speaker 2: You're so oh my gosh, so right.

614
00:34:12,440 --> 00:34:15,000
Speaker 5: And I think that's why I hate those Hollywood shows

615
00:34:15,040 --> 00:34:18,120
Speaker 5: because they do also do the opposite. So they make

616
00:34:18,680 --> 00:34:21,759
Speaker 5: the darker skinned girls feel inferior, and then they make

617
00:34:21,800 --> 00:34:25,920
Speaker 5: the lighter skin girls feel superior. And it's like, no,

618
00:34:26,239 --> 00:34:29,040
Speaker 5: this is not real. That's not shouldn't be reality. You know,

619
00:34:29,120 --> 00:34:31,239
Speaker 5: you shouldn't expect that when a guy walks through the room,

620
00:34:31,239 --> 00:34:34,239
Speaker 5: because you're lighter, he will talk to you first, or

621
00:34:34,280 --> 00:34:36,640
Speaker 5: because you're darker, he won't show you any interest.

622
00:34:36,840 --> 00:34:41,200
Speaker 3: Like that's not normal, it really all at all? Yeah?

623
00:34:41,760 --> 00:34:44,480
Speaker 4: Yeah, but do you think that colorism then is worse

624
00:34:44,520 --> 00:34:46,360
Speaker 4: in black culture than in other cultures?

625
00:34:49,080 --> 00:34:49,600
Speaker 2: I don't.

626
00:34:51,000 --> 00:34:54,000
Speaker 3: Be black feels good the cross system for me.

627
00:34:54,080 --> 00:34:57,040
Speaker 4: I'm like, yo, that's that's next level. I won't lie,

628
00:34:57,160 --> 00:34:59,439
Speaker 4: like I'll be honest. I was like when I found

629
00:34:59,440 --> 00:35:04,520
Speaker 4: out about it, like say what now, Like, yeah, it's.

630
00:35:04,840 --> 00:35:09,839
Speaker 5: Bad, I think from what I've seen of it and

631
00:35:10,120 --> 00:35:14,200
Speaker 5: the experiences I've heard. Yeah, because like it's like almost

632
00:35:14,200 --> 00:35:17,120
Speaker 5: like having a resume, right then you put your clasts

633
00:35:17,160 --> 00:35:20,120
Speaker 5: in there, and then you also can't be mixing and

634
00:35:20,120 --> 00:35:23,239
Speaker 5: and then also families coming to it, right because then

635
00:35:23,280 --> 00:35:27,880
Speaker 5: the family like ah so, And to be honest, actually,

636
00:35:28,000 --> 00:35:31,200
Speaker 5: in like for Indians especially, you see in their social

637
00:35:31,200 --> 00:35:34,160
Speaker 5: and their social media and the entertainment industry, you will

638
00:35:34,200 --> 00:35:36,279
Speaker 5: never see the darker Indians like that.

639
00:35:37,040 --> 00:35:37,920
Speaker 3: You know, so you.

640
00:35:39,840 --> 00:35:42,759
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, and then even they are like accused of

641
00:35:42,960 --> 00:35:47,239
Speaker 5: lightning and frightening their skin because then you see her

642
00:35:47,239 --> 00:35:49,000
Speaker 5: when she wasn't as popular and you see her now,

643
00:35:49,239 --> 00:35:51,680
Speaker 5: And this is where it becomes tricky. Is it access

644
00:35:52,239 --> 00:35:55,799
Speaker 5: or is it seeking these products on purpose? And I

645
00:35:55,800 --> 00:35:57,640
Speaker 5: think Black Pole also have the same thing. We have

646
00:35:57,680 --> 00:36:01,040
Speaker 5: a huge problem with skin lightening yep, and people using

647
00:36:01,040 --> 00:36:04,000
Speaker 5: all these toxic ingredients and then you come back from there,

648
00:36:04,160 --> 00:36:06,359
Speaker 5: but people are expecting it as well, like oh, you've

649
00:36:06,400 --> 00:36:09,479
Speaker 5: got money now, so you've been looking lighter as you said,

650
00:36:10,960 --> 00:36:14,600
Speaker 5: You've come back lighter. It's like, was that intentional or

651
00:36:14,840 --> 00:36:17,120
Speaker 5: was that better food and better products?

652
00:36:17,239 --> 00:36:19,480
Speaker 2: Girl? This isshes land shocks.

653
00:36:23,120 --> 00:36:28,279
Speaker 4: I think yeah, yeah, man, Like I think it's just

654
00:36:29,440 --> 00:36:33,560
Speaker 4: it's a very sad, sad reality. I think with black people,

655
00:36:34,040 --> 00:36:37,360
Speaker 4: how we are quote unquote lucky, which not really lucky,

656
00:36:37,719 --> 00:36:41,800
Speaker 4: is that people understand that black people will struggle, so

657
00:36:41,840 --> 00:36:44,880
Speaker 4: you won't have access, so there's no real pressure to

658
00:36:45,200 --> 00:36:48,560
Speaker 4: like go to the extremes of skin lightning, you know,

659
00:36:48,960 --> 00:36:51,520
Speaker 4: or to pull on Michael Jackson or something like that.

660
00:36:52,280 --> 00:36:57,480
Speaker 4: But I think we definitely have a lot an theties

661
00:36:57,480 --> 00:37:01,719
Speaker 4: into colonialism in that mix, because then it's all that

662
00:37:01,920 --> 00:37:05,680
Speaker 4: it's all in that part, and it's a whole lot

663
00:37:05,719 --> 00:37:08,600
Speaker 4: of mess to unravel and take yourself out of that

664
00:37:08,719 --> 00:37:11,520
Speaker 4: mindset and mentality.

665
00:37:12,200 --> 00:37:16,360
Speaker 5: But yay girl, because you see like West Africans I

666
00:37:16,400 --> 00:37:18,880
Speaker 5: think have it bad as well. There's a lot of

667
00:37:18,920 --> 00:37:21,799
Speaker 5: bleaching that happened Jamaica. I just saw a documentary on

668
00:37:22,040 --> 00:37:25,560
Speaker 5: from Jamaica teaching from a young age. Yes, so you

669
00:37:25,640 --> 00:37:28,719
Speaker 5: get some cultures that are very much into it, and

670
00:37:28,800 --> 00:37:32,160
Speaker 5: I think Zimbabwe for the most part, even though.

671
00:37:32,000 --> 00:37:33,880
Speaker 3: We do this on each other, we expect it to

672
00:37:33,960 --> 00:37:36,320
Speaker 3: be natural. So we be spared.

673
00:37:36,560 --> 00:37:39,200
Speaker 5: But having said that, now with access going to South Africa,

674
00:37:39,360 --> 00:37:42,480
Speaker 5: going to the countries, we are getting into the lightning.

675
00:37:42,560 --> 00:37:45,839
Speaker 3: But it's not not as big as opposed and other

676
00:37:45,920 --> 00:37:47,000
Speaker 3: parts of the world.

677
00:37:47,600 --> 00:37:51,560
Speaker 5: But yo, that's why I think would depend on their

678
00:37:51,640 --> 00:37:53,800
Speaker 5: genes topefully get them there.

679
00:37:54,000 --> 00:37:56,240
Speaker 3: But it's sad. It's so sad.

680
00:37:56,719 --> 00:38:00,840
Speaker 2: But how like, how do you even like handle that?

681
00:38:01,040 --> 00:38:04,279
Speaker 4: Do you feel like you're over the colorism issue or

682
00:38:04,320 --> 00:38:08,840
Speaker 4: the scars that you know, or the talk or do

683
00:38:08,880 --> 00:38:10,799
Speaker 4: you think you've moved past it? And how do you

684
00:38:10,840 --> 00:38:13,520
Speaker 4: even deal with it? Or you know when someone's like,

685
00:38:13,520 --> 00:38:16,160
Speaker 4: oh and the actual guy and what's that like? How

686
00:38:16,200 --> 00:38:18,160
Speaker 4: do you handle those situations? Now?

687
00:38:19,239 --> 00:38:22,200
Speaker 5: I think for me, I'm still learning. It's still the

688
00:38:22,440 --> 00:38:27,960
Speaker 5: working progress in terms all it's not only layered with colorism,

689
00:38:28,000 --> 00:38:30,719
Speaker 5: but it's also laid in with hair. So I won't

690
00:38:30,760 --> 00:38:33,440
Speaker 5: necessarily go to the beach all the time. One, I

691
00:38:33,440 --> 00:38:35,080
Speaker 5: don't want to get dark too. I don't want to

692
00:38:35,160 --> 00:38:38,120
Speaker 5: ruin my hair, so like double wherey right? So even

693
00:38:38,160 --> 00:38:40,359
Speaker 5: if I have then when I have braids, which means

694
00:38:40,360 --> 00:38:43,360
Speaker 5: I can go and swim freely, then I'm also not

695
00:38:43,440 --> 00:38:44,239
Speaker 5: thinking I don't want to be.

696
00:38:44,200 --> 00:38:45,279
Speaker 3: In the sun. So it's like.

697
00:38:47,520 --> 00:38:51,080
Speaker 5: I can't like and actually black people are known, like

698
00:38:51,200 --> 00:38:55,280
Speaker 5: doctors say, even though our skin is made for melanin,

699
00:38:55,600 --> 00:38:56,480
Speaker 5: a lot of us actually have.

700
00:38:56,480 --> 00:38:57,960
Speaker 3: A viteom indeed deficiency.

701
00:38:58,360 --> 00:39:02,040
Speaker 5: We avoid the sun, and we're only now learning that

702
00:39:02,080 --> 00:39:04,920
Speaker 5: we need to also put sunscreen on it because we're

703
00:39:05,000 --> 00:39:08,320
Speaker 5: used to the sun. We can handle the handle and

704
00:39:08,400 --> 00:39:11,160
Speaker 5: quote unquote the sun a bit more doesn't mean we

705
00:39:11,160 --> 00:39:12,400
Speaker 5: don't protect ourselves.

706
00:39:12,680 --> 00:39:13,759
Speaker 3: So that's also another thing.

707
00:39:13,840 --> 00:39:17,080
Speaker 5: Who we used to always think sunscreen is for not

708
00:39:17,200 --> 00:39:19,080
Speaker 5: for us, like it doesn't matter enough to put it on.

709
00:39:19,719 --> 00:39:20,000
Speaker 3: You know.

710
00:39:20,360 --> 00:39:24,040
Speaker 5: So I think it's such a layered topic still, even

711
00:39:24,120 --> 00:39:28,200
Speaker 5: when buying makeup, you're like so worried about not going.

712
00:39:27,960 --> 00:39:30,640
Speaker 3: To light because there's like what are you trying to do?

713
00:39:30,760 --> 00:39:32,600
Speaker 5: Then you're as worried about not going too dark, like

714
00:39:32,640 --> 00:39:34,520
Speaker 5: find the right shape.

715
00:39:35,000 --> 00:39:36,520
Speaker 3: Then you you've mentioned fent tea.

716
00:39:36,640 --> 00:39:38,799
Speaker 5: You have to depend on brands like that that have

717
00:39:39,280 --> 00:39:43,000
Speaker 5: a wide selection, otherwise you look pasty or you look

718
00:39:43,040 --> 00:39:43,560
Speaker 5: too dark.

719
00:39:43,640 --> 00:39:44,200
Speaker 2: So it's like.

720
00:39:46,920 --> 00:39:50,960
Speaker 5: I'm still d exactly in terms of my inner self,

721
00:39:52,120 --> 00:39:55,280
Speaker 5: I've always been okay with it, like whatever, I've always

722
00:39:55,360 --> 00:39:57,760
Speaker 5: been off the mindset, and you brought up Kelly Rowland,

723
00:39:57,800 --> 00:40:01,080
Speaker 5: which is a good example of whatever tone I have,

724
00:40:01,280 --> 00:40:01,840
Speaker 5: I want.

725
00:40:01,680 --> 00:40:02,960
Speaker 3: It to be the same.

726
00:40:03,360 --> 00:40:05,200
Speaker 5: Yeah, you know, I don't want to have like dark

727
00:40:05,280 --> 00:40:08,000
Speaker 5: hands and the light face or light face and dark

728
00:40:08,080 --> 00:40:11,680
Speaker 5: like you know, just just just be healthy and the

729
00:40:11,760 --> 00:40:15,360
Speaker 5: same whatever color it is. So I think I'm happy

730
00:40:15,360 --> 00:40:18,360
Speaker 5: that I have that feeling and that's what I like,

731
00:40:18,960 --> 00:40:22,279
Speaker 5: but I definitely still have some work to do.

732
00:40:22,520 --> 00:40:25,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think it's true.

733
00:40:25,239 --> 00:40:30,960
Speaker 4: Like it's an ongoing and I've had to over the years,

734
00:40:31,000 --> 00:40:35,160
Speaker 4: like trying to like just embrace my beauty, like that

735
00:40:35,280 --> 00:40:37,560
Speaker 4: I am beautiful, Like I mean.

736
00:40:37,440 --> 00:40:40,680
Speaker 2: Look at beautiful that you know, Papa.

737
00:40:40,400 --> 00:40:43,240
Speaker 3: Dubes bless me beautiful.

738
00:40:42,719 --> 00:40:47,680
Speaker 4: No, thank you, and just embracing that beauty is in

739
00:40:47,800 --> 00:40:50,560
Speaker 4: so many facets. It's not just the skin in your

740
00:40:50,600 --> 00:40:56,320
Speaker 4: skin tone. It's also like your features, your body, your essence,

741
00:40:56,440 --> 00:40:59,399
Speaker 4: your energy, your vibe, the person, you know what I mean.

742
00:40:59,440 --> 00:41:02,160
Speaker 2: Like, there's so much that contributes to beauty.

743
00:41:02,280 --> 00:41:08,359
Speaker 4: And I think it's also just like embracing like this

744
00:41:08,400 --> 00:41:12,520
Speaker 4: is who I am and it doesn't make me less

745
00:41:12,560 --> 00:41:16,680
Speaker 4: of a person. And if someone cannot value me because

746
00:41:17,239 --> 00:41:18,480
Speaker 4: they think I'm too.

747
00:41:18,400 --> 00:41:20,880
Speaker 2: Dark or whatever, it's like, hey, that's.

748
00:41:20,719 --> 00:41:24,120
Speaker 4: Your funeral, like I know me and it's about, like

749
00:41:24,160 --> 00:41:27,120
Speaker 4: you said, being healthy, taking care of you. It's just

750
00:41:27,200 --> 00:41:32,160
Speaker 4: good skin practices, like you know, you know one thing

751
00:41:32,320 --> 00:41:36,719
Speaker 4: like my sister has beut full skin, like her skin

752
00:41:36,800 --> 00:41:39,399
Speaker 4: is just like what like one complexion.

753
00:41:39,719 --> 00:41:41,320
Speaker 2: So I'm like, girl, like, I.

754
00:41:41,280 --> 00:41:44,560
Speaker 4: Want to take care of my skin like bad healthy,

755
00:41:44,840 --> 00:41:45,720
Speaker 4: you know, the glow.

756
00:41:46,320 --> 00:41:47,200
Speaker 2: That's what I want.

757
00:41:48,000 --> 00:41:51,680
Speaker 4: In terms of the inner work, I've mentioned before how

758
00:41:51,680 --> 00:41:54,400
Speaker 4: my mom kind of you know, would prop me up

759
00:41:54,560 --> 00:41:56,719
Speaker 4: like oh, you're my black beauty. I think that went

760
00:41:56,760 --> 00:41:59,240
Speaker 4: a long way to help me. I've said this before,

761
00:41:59,800 --> 00:42:07,680
Speaker 4: and I think it's also realizing that unfortunately the world

762
00:42:07,880 --> 00:42:12,200
Speaker 4: we're damaged. It's a damaged place, but that doesn't mean

763
00:42:12,320 --> 00:42:19,320
Speaker 4: you are damaged, if that makes sense, and ongoing constantly.

764
00:42:19,400 --> 00:42:23,359
Speaker 4: That's why I celebrate the women I've mentioned here on here,

765
00:42:23,760 --> 00:42:28,239
Speaker 4: like Tinda Tima we had on on the podcast, like

766
00:42:29,000 --> 00:42:33,600
Speaker 4: just like beautiful, beautiful women who look like me. And

767
00:42:33,680 --> 00:42:37,640
Speaker 4: that's importance of representation. If we ask a question all

768
00:42:37,680 --> 00:42:40,120
Speaker 4: the time like why are people on about it, it's

769
00:42:40,120 --> 00:42:43,600
Speaker 4: so that we start to feel like we belong to

770
00:42:43,760 --> 00:42:47,520
Speaker 4: in the world as we are. And yeah, that's that's

771
00:42:47,560 --> 00:42:50,839
Speaker 4: that's what I'll say yeah, yeah, man.

772
00:42:51,080 --> 00:42:55,840
Speaker 3: Man, it's like it's a kind of words.

773
00:42:56,880 --> 00:43:01,160
Speaker 4: I think every topic we pretty much I have chosen

774
00:43:01,200 --> 00:43:03,160
Speaker 4: so far has been a kind of ones like you

775
00:43:03,200 --> 00:43:04,320
Speaker 4: can go in and.

776
00:43:04,200 --> 00:43:08,160
Speaker 2: Go like like so many as.

777
00:43:07,880 --> 00:43:11,839
Speaker 7: Yeah, but for sure, And if I not take away

778
00:43:11,880 --> 00:43:15,080
Speaker 7: as words of advice to understen because apparently we give

779
00:43:15,200 --> 00:43:18,440
Speaker 7: advice because we can.

780
00:43:19,120 --> 00:43:23,680
Speaker 5: Psychology, psychology, psychology, Please.

781
00:43:23,440 --> 00:43:26,120
Speaker 2: Don't come for a psychologist, please please.

782
00:43:27,640 --> 00:43:34,160
Speaker 3: I think just think happy being you like it really

783
00:43:34,239 --> 00:43:38,720
Speaker 3: is important, Like I think, yeah, I mean.

784
00:43:40,960 --> 00:43:43,560
Speaker 5: Comparing yourself to people all the time and wondering why

785
00:43:43,640 --> 00:43:46,319
Speaker 5: you're light. As I said, colorism is a spinaky thing.

786
00:43:46,800 --> 00:43:50,160
Speaker 5: Was one room you could be the lightest, the next

787
00:43:50,200 --> 00:43:51,360
Speaker 5: room you could be the darkest.

788
00:43:51,400 --> 00:43:53,839
Speaker 3: So then what then, what are you going to do?

789
00:43:54,120 --> 00:43:57,640
Speaker 5: You know, you can't con't please everybody, So you just

790
00:43:57,800 --> 00:44:01,200
Speaker 5: have to make sure you're happy, you're healthy and lit,

791
00:44:01,239 --> 00:44:02,840
Speaker 5: you in a glow shine.

792
00:44:03,280 --> 00:44:04,240
Speaker 3: Oh and not let.

793
00:44:04,200 --> 00:44:08,480
Speaker 5: These these stereotypes you've held on for so long too,

794
00:44:09,320 --> 00:44:14,000
Speaker 5: you know, keep holding us back. I'm with you and

795
00:44:14,120 --> 00:44:16,520
Speaker 5: like sometimes calling it out, like even as you said,

796
00:44:16,560 --> 00:44:18,880
Speaker 5: amongst your peers, if you see something.

797
00:44:18,680 --> 00:44:22,239
Speaker 3: That's like you know, you can say hey, dude, like

798
00:44:22,320 --> 00:44:27,560
Speaker 3: we've moved on from it. Yeah, seriously, for sure, that's

799
00:44:27,560 --> 00:44:29,239
Speaker 3: the many advice I have and you for.

800
00:44:29,280 --> 00:44:34,400
Speaker 4: Sure, I think for it's also it's the work you

801
00:44:34,680 --> 00:44:37,759
Speaker 4: have to work on yourself. That's all you can do.

802
00:44:38,160 --> 00:44:43,080
Speaker 4: And it's about reevaluating, assessing why maybe we think, like

803
00:44:43,120 --> 00:44:46,000
Speaker 4: we had a hard moment in this episode, like why

804
00:44:46,040 --> 00:44:47,319
Speaker 4: do we think the way we do?

805
00:44:47,400 --> 00:44:49,840
Speaker 2: Why does it affect you? Though? And being honest Sometimes

806
00:44:49,880 --> 00:44:50,400
Speaker 2: you're scared to.

807
00:44:50,400 --> 00:44:52,840
Speaker 4: Be honest with thesef like hey, maybe I am a colorist,

808
00:44:53,080 --> 00:44:56,080
Speaker 4: Like it's okay, because then that's where you can start

809
00:44:56,120 --> 00:44:58,719
Speaker 4: being like but why and you know, work on that

810
00:44:59,040 --> 00:45:05,560
Speaker 4: and on that self confidence. And remember brown skiner skin,

811
00:45:05,840 --> 00:45:08,040
Speaker 4: just like we say pears.

812
00:45:07,640 --> 00:45:09,759
Speaker 2: But we're not saying white like the pros, but you know,

813
00:45:09,920 --> 00:45:10,520
Speaker 2: like you know.

814
00:45:10,680 --> 00:45:15,120
Speaker 4: Glossy like the pro skin girls like pearl the best

815
00:45:15,120 --> 00:45:16,240
Speaker 4: thing in the world.

816
00:45:17,280 --> 00:45:19,640
Speaker 2: I wouldn't trade you for anybody else things.

817
00:45:19,760 --> 00:45:23,799
Speaker 4: So look, man, we are all on this planet, on

818
00:45:23,880 --> 00:45:27,520
Speaker 4: this world because we all deserve to be.

819
00:45:29,480 --> 00:45:33,560
Speaker 2: Loved cherished to be here. So you are here for

820
00:45:33,560 --> 00:45:38,359
Speaker 2: a reason. But yeah, anyhow, yeah, thank you for being

821
00:45:38,400 --> 00:45:42,240
Speaker 2: with us before beautiful words. Yeah, I try, I try.

822
00:45:42,360 --> 00:45:44,680
Speaker 2: I just borded it. From Beyonce A little bit, a

823
00:45:44,719 --> 00:45:50,040
Speaker 2: little bit zim shout out for this episode.

824
00:45:50,480 --> 00:45:54,600
Speaker 8: Our Zim shout out is a beautiful young girl who

825
00:45:54,719 --> 00:45:57,279
Speaker 8: were getting ready to go into the Winter Olympics, and

826
00:45:57,320 --> 00:45:59,759
Speaker 8: it just makes me think of the Summer Olympics and

827
00:46:00,200 --> 00:46:03,720
Speaker 8: one of our zimbabwe And swimmers who was their Donata Katai.

828
00:46:05,480 --> 00:46:08,880
Speaker 5: She also popped up in my just my periphery because

829
00:46:08,920 --> 00:46:14,160
Speaker 5: I saw some as results in school and she got

830
00:46:14,160 --> 00:46:16,360
Speaker 5: like all a's and I'm like, my god, this girl's

831
00:46:16,440 --> 00:46:20,200
Speaker 5: like smashing goals and also doing one in school which is.

832
00:46:22,400 --> 00:46:23,160
Speaker 3: Parf.

833
00:46:24,040 --> 00:46:28,520
Speaker 5: So she's definitely a young queen on the rise and

834
00:46:28,800 --> 00:46:31,600
Speaker 5: I think today we have to give her all the flowers.

835
00:46:31,840 --> 00:46:33,280
Speaker 3: Keep going, Donata.

836
00:46:33,960 --> 00:46:38,320
Speaker 4: Shout out to you doing that there and doing it beautifully.

837
00:46:38,440 --> 00:46:42,640
Speaker 2: Yah. I really feel like gen z ah, they're giving

838
00:46:42,680 --> 00:46:43,759
Speaker 2: us a run for them, like.

839
00:46:44,000 --> 00:46:46,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, I know and flying the flags.

840
00:46:47,239 --> 00:46:48,640
Speaker 2: Yeah a thousand percent.

841
00:46:49,200 --> 00:46:54,400
Speaker 4: Yeah. Thanks Amanda for being here with me as always

842
00:46:54,400 --> 00:46:57,120
Speaker 4: taking this time out. Thank you to everyone who listens

843
00:46:57,160 --> 00:46:58,200
Speaker 4: to our Shenanigans.

844
00:46:59,400 --> 00:46:59,960
Speaker 2: Appreciate it.

845
00:47:00,120 --> 00:47:04,439
Speaker 4: Good season, like we're still shocks, can you not tell?

846
00:47:04,520 --> 00:47:08,359
Speaker 2: We thank you?

847
00:47:08,719 --> 00:47:11,239
Speaker 3: Grandma's doing our twentieth season and we'll be late.

848
00:47:11,400 --> 00:47:13,920
Speaker 2: I ain't nothing wrong with that. I'm mad at that.

849
00:47:14,200 --> 00:47:18,960
Speaker 4: I'll be like, hey, let me tell you.

850
00:47:17,800 --> 00:47:22,120
Speaker 2: Know, thank you so much. We love you, We appreciate you.

851
00:47:22,239 --> 00:47:23,359
Speaker 2: Get in touch with us.

852
00:47:23,760 --> 00:47:28,279
Speaker 4: It's layered on Instagram, it's laird Pod Twitter, and it's

853
00:47:28,360 --> 00:47:29,040
Speaker 4: lad pod.

854
00:47:28,840 --> 00:47:30,280
Speaker 2: At gmail dot com.

855
00:47:30,320 --> 00:47:34,480
Speaker 4: Email, send out your shout outs, comment all the love.

856
00:47:34,600 --> 00:47:39,239
Speaker 6: Please rate and review us where you listen. We appreciate it.

857
00:47:39,719 --> 00:47:44,480
Speaker 6: Share and let your family and friends in on this podcast.

858
00:47:44,520 --> 00:47:46,640
Speaker 6: If you like it, I mean, if you don't, don't

859
00:47:46,680 --> 00:47:48,479
Speaker 6: be like we hate this podcast, don't listen.

860
00:47:48,520 --> 00:47:50,000
Speaker 3: It's finny share anyway.

861
00:47:50,920 --> 00:47:55,719
Speaker 4: But we appreciate it and we'll look forward to seeing

862
00:47:55,760 --> 00:47:56,760
Speaker 4: you in the next episode.

863
00:47:56,800 --> 00:48:05,200
Speaker 2: Everybody, take care of yourselves. Bye bye guys, A little

864
00:48:05,239 --> 00:48:06,040
Speaker 2: go use your