1 00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:05,800 Speaker 1: She's on the Money. She's on the Money. 2 00:00:14,000 --> 00:00:17,599 Speaker 2: Hello, and welcome to She's on the Money, the podcast 3 00:00:17,640 --> 00:00:21,759 Speaker 2: for millennials who want financial freedom. My name's Tony Lodge, 4 00:00:21,800 --> 00:00:25,280 Speaker 2: and joining me for another Money Diary episode is Miss 5 00:00:25,320 --> 00:00:26,440 Speaker 2: Victoria Devine. 6 00:00:26,600 --> 00:00:29,120 Speaker 3: Hello, good morning, Miss Tony Lodge. 7 00:00:29,600 --> 00:00:32,960 Speaker 2: So we've got a really good money Diary today, but 8 00:00:33,080 --> 00:00:34,839 Speaker 2: just before we get into it, I just want to 9 00:00:34,880 --> 00:00:37,680 Speaker 2: give everybody a little trigger warning that listening to this 10 00:00:37,720 --> 00:00:40,080 Speaker 2: one might actually bring up some things because we will 11 00:00:40,120 --> 00:00:44,920 Speaker 2: be talking about chronic illness and also financially abusive relationships. 12 00:00:45,159 --> 00:00:47,080 Speaker 2: So if that's something that might not sit well with 13 00:00:47,120 --> 00:00:49,920 Speaker 2: you this morning, we totally understand and we'll be able 14 00:00:49,960 --> 00:00:51,920 Speaker 2: to see on Wednesday for our deep dive. 15 00:00:52,080 --> 00:00:53,680 Speaker 3: We just want to make sure that everybody in our 16 00:00:53,720 --> 00:00:56,640 Speaker 3: community feels safe and really comfortable listening to our episodes, 17 00:00:56,640 --> 00:00:59,400 Speaker 3: so I think that's really important, Tony. With that in mind, 18 00:00:59,760 --> 00:01:02,800 Speaker 3: I haven't yet heard this story, So Tony, can you 19 00:01:02,840 --> 00:01:04,880 Speaker 3: read out this week's Money Dires email for me? 20 00:01:05,160 --> 00:01:06,039 Speaker 1: Okay, here we go. 21 00:01:06,959 --> 00:01:10,319 Speaker 2: I moved out Slash, got kicked out at fourteen and 22 00:01:10,440 --> 00:01:11,280 Speaker 2: never went back. 23 00:01:11,440 --> 00:01:12,679 Speaker 1: I'm now twenty seven. 24 00:01:13,240 --> 00:01:15,679 Speaker 2: I had to work multiple jobs at once just to 25 00:01:15,720 --> 00:01:18,160 Speaker 2: pay rent and often stole food from work as I 26 00:01:18,200 --> 00:01:21,640 Speaker 2: couldn't afford it, forced to leave school to work, then 27 00:01:21,720 --> 00:01:24,720 Speaker 2: returned as an adult, got through all my own and 28 00:01:24,800 --> 00:01:29,920 Speaker 2: off to university despite a severe learning disability Erlan's. I 29 00:01:30,000 --> 00:01:33,400 Speaker 2: was also recovering from a few injuries from major incidences, 30 00:01:33,480 --> 00:01:36,680 Speaker 2: including a car accident and being clipped by a freight train. 31 00:01:38,040 --> 00:01:40,399 Speaker 2: Less than one year into UNI and I land in 32 00:01:40,480 --> 00:01:43,399 Speaker 2: hospital after a very minor surgery went wrong and had 33 00:01:43,440 --> 00:01:46,200 Speaker 2: to learn how to walk again, and was bedridden for months. 34 00:01:47,040 --> 00:01:49,560 Speaker 2: During that first year of UNI, and a while after, 35 00:01:49,640 --> 00:01:52,680 Speaker 2: I was in a financially abusive relationship and landed in 36 00:01:52,720 --> 00:01:56,120 Speaker 2: twenty thousand dollars in debt. I never thought I'd be 37 00:01:56,200 --> 00:01:59,080 Speaker 2: out of debt, and now I'm so so close. I've 38 00:01:59,080 --> 00:02:01,880 Speaker 2: worked my butt off, landed in a secure industry, and 39 00:02:01,920 --> 00:02:04,960 Speaker 2: I'm now close to having that debt paid off. I 40 00:02:05,000 --> 00:02:09,079 Speaker 2: live with fibromyalgia, arthritis, nerve damage in my leg, and 41 00:02:09,120 --> 00:02:12,440 Speaker 2: an autoimmune disease. So yes, my medical is not great, 42 00:02:12,520 --> 00:02:14,960 Speaker 2: but most days I get up and still work. I 43 00:02:15,080 --> 00:02:17,160 Speaker 2: rely on no one else to pay my bills or 44 00:02:17,200 --> 00:02:19,680 Speaker 2: rent or debt off, and I'm so proud of how 45 00:02:19,720 --> 00:02:22,080 Speaker 2: far I've come thank you to the team for getting 46 00:02:22,120 --> 00:02:23,600 Speaker 2: me out of my financial dark. 47 00:02:23,960 --> 00:02:26,720 Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, what a story. 48 00:02:27,320 --> 00:02:29,480 Speaker 2: Such a story, and we've got our money. Doarist on 49 00:02:29,520 --> 00:02:32,880 Speaker 2: the line as always, you can already hear hello money. 50 00:02:35,280 --> 00:02:39,520 Speaker 3: Girl. So I well, thank you, thank you so much 51 00:02:39,520 --> 00:02:42,359 Speaker 3: for joining us and sharing your journey with us. That 52 00:02:42,639 --> 00:02:44,799 Speaker 3: is a journey. Is it a. 53 00:02:44,760 --> 00:02:47,000 Speaker 1: Story for a twenty seven year old person? 54 00:02:47,120 --> 00:02:50,480 Speaker 3: That's a lot? Oh my gosh, it just kept getting 55 00:02:51,240 --> 00:02:54,160 Speaker 3: more interesting. And then a freight train and then you 56 00:02:54,200 --> 00:02:57,560 Speaker 3: know everything else. I was like, what, this poor woman 57 00:02:57,639 --> 00:02:59,120 Speaker 3: has gone through a lot. 58 00:03:00,200 --> 00:03:01,840 Speaker 1: It's been a roller coaster. 59 00:03:03,560 --> 00:03:07,120 Speaker 3: Yeah, like it's been a freight train, my friend. Or 60 00:03:08,160 --> 00:03:10,560 Speaker 3: let's jump straight into the questions, because I have a 61 00:03:10,639 --> 00:03:13,320 Speaker 3: number of other questions that I'd love to learn about, 62 00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:17,120 Speaker 3: but let's start with the basics. What is your attitude 63 00:03:17,160 --> 00:03:20,040 Speaker 3: towards money at the moment. 64 00:03:20,120 --> 00:03:25,160 Speaker 4: I'm quite conservative. My attitude's changed over the years. When 65 00:03:25,200 --> 00:03:29,600 Speaker 4: I was younger, it was, you know, we lived day 66 00:03:29,600 --> 00:03:33,360 Speaker 4: by day basically, and you just did what. 67 00:03:33,240 --> 00:03:34,720 Speaker 1: You had to do. If you had to work, you 68 00:03:34,760 --> 00:03:35,320 Speaker 1: had to work. 69 00:03:36,720 --> 00:03:40,360 Speaker 4: And then I got into an attitude where it was like, foamo, 70 00:03:40,560 --> 00:03:41,240 Speaker 4: live my life. 71 00:03:41,440 --> 00:03:42,240 Speaker 1: It should be great. 72 00:03:42,800 --> 00:03:47,680 Speaker 4: And then I knuckled down and now, yeah, I guess 73 00:03:48,280 --> 00:03:52,560 Speaker 4: my mindset has changed. I've broken generational poverty, which I'm 74 00:03:52,600 --> 00:03:55,520 Speaker 4: really proud of. So I'm into a new realm that 75 00:03:55,600 --> 00:03:59,000 Speaker 4: I've never explored before financially. So it's a bit hard 76 00:03:59,040 --> 00:04:01,400 Speaker 4: to say what my attitude is because it's really unknown 77 00:04:01,440 --> 00:04:02,000 Speaker 4: at the moment. 78 00:04:03,000 --> 00:04:05,400 Speaker 3: But that's so cool. Are you proud of yourself for 79 00:04:05,440 --> 00:04:07,400 Speaker 3: having gone through all of that and now you're in 80 00:04:07,440 --> 00:04:10,559 Speaker 3: this epic position and changing your circumstances. 81 00:04:11,840 --> 00:04:14,760 Speaker 1: Look, it's hard to say it. I say yes, but 82 00:04:14,800 --> 00:04:16,360 Speaker 1: when people ask me, I actually. 83 00:04:16,160 --> 00:04:18,760 Speaker 4: Backpedal and say, well, no, I just put myself down 84 00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:20,320 Speaker 4: as being a bit stubborn and you do what you 85 00:04:20,440 --> 00:04:22,520 Speaker 4: have to do. But I had to really think about 86 00:04:22,560 --> 00:04:25,080 Speaker 4: it for a while, and yeah, I am proud. 87 00:04:25,120 --> 00:04:28,320 Speaker 1: I just don't like to I guess fluff my own floe. 88 00:04:28,720 --> 00:04:31,920 Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, you need to I will. I literally 89 00:04:31,920 --> 00:04:34,039 Speaker 3: love it. I'm genuinely so proud of you and the 90 00:04:34,160 --> 00:04:36,280 Speaker 3: story that we've just heard. And I haven't even heard 91 00:04:36,360 --> 00:04:37,880 Speaker 3: all of it yet, and I don't even get to 92 00:04:38,040 --> 00:04:42,120 Speaker 3: ask questions yet. So the next question is what do 93 00:04:42,160 --> 00:04:44,479 Speaker 3: you do for work? And how much do you earn? 94 00:04:45,640 --> 00:04:48,520 Speaker 4: So I'm a public service with the government. I was 95 00:04:48,640 --> 00:04:52,640 Speaker 4: very lucky to learn that just before I finish university. 96 00:04:53,520 --> 00:04:57,120 Speaker 4: And at the moment, I'm earning eighty eight thousand a year. 97 00:04:57,760 --> 00:04:58,800 Speaker 1: Whow that is? 98 00:04:59,440 --> 00:05:02,359 Speaker 3: That is so emerge money, especially having gone through what 99 00:05:02,400 --> 00:05:05,720 Speaker 3: you've gone through, and you're not proud of yourself. Oh 100 00:05:05,760 --> 00:05:09,840 Speaker 3: my gosh, I'm going to beat it into you all right. 101 00:05:10,360 --> 00:05:13,119 Speaker 3: Next question, what is your big money goal? 102 00:05:14,720 --> 00:05:17,120 Speaker 4: So if you asked me this two weeks ago, I 103 00:05:17,120 --> 00:05:20,279 Speaker 4: would have said paying off all of my bad debt. However, 104 00:05:20,520 --> 00:05:23,640 Speaker 4: I have just finished paying off my bad debt eight 105 00:05:23,720 --> 00:05:26,760 Speaker 4: years earlier than I oh my god, yes, and three 106 00:05:26,800 --> 00:05:29,280 Speaker 4: years earlier than my minilal re payments. 107 00:05:30,080 --> 00:05:31,880 Speaker 3: So twenty three years early. 108 00:05:32,720 --> 00:05:36,680 Speaker 1: Yes, yes, so that was my money goal. 109 00:05:36,839 --> 00:05:39,280 Speaker 4: So right now I'm in the process of moving and 110 00:05:39,279 --> 00:05:40,680 Speaker 4: relocating for a new role. 111 00:05:41,240 --> 00:05:43,760 Speaker 1: So I actually don't have a money goal at this point. 112 00:05:45,600 --> 00:05:49,760 Speaker 3: Yeah, because I just last time to plan and with 113 00:05:49,800 --> 00:05:52,559 Speaker 3: all this free cash flow, now you smash down that debt, 114 00:05:52,600 --> 00:05:54,640 Speaker 3: you can make the most of it and actually just 115 00:05:54,680 --> 00:05:57,000 Speaker 3: take your time and they come deal with it. Oh 116 00:05:57,040 --> 00:05:58,720 Speaker 3: my gosh, how cool. 117 00:05:58,920 --> 00:06:00,520 Speaker 1: Yes, it's it's big. 118 00:06:01,920 --> 00:06:04,880 Speaker 3: Yeah, that's huge. Oh my gosh. And she says she's 119 00:06:04,920 --> 00:06:08,039 Speaker 3: not proud of herself, so you're going to get in 120 00:06:08,080 --> 00:06:12,400 Speaker 3: trouble with me very soon. Well, friend, my friends, my partner. 121 00:06:14,279 --> 00:06:18,000 Speaker 3: All right, next question, next question, Do you currently invest? 122 00:06:19,480 --> 00:06:19,680 Speaker 1: No? 123 00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:21,719 Speaker 4: So my goal was to get rid of that debt 124 00:06:21,760 --> 00:06:26,080 Speaker 4: first and foremost, which obviously I've just done. But I 125 00:06:26,120 --> 00:06:28,839 Speaker 4: after listening to your podcast, I changed my mindset in 126 00:06:28,960 --> 00:06:31,440 Speaker 4: that I have super So yeah, I guess in that 127 00:06:31,560 --> 00:06:35,280 Speaker 4: role that I do invest. But other than that, that's 128 00:06:35,320 --> 00:06:36,479 Speaker 4: my next adventure. 129 00:06:36,520 --> 00:06:39,960 Speaker 3: I guess that is very exciting to hear any in 130 00:06:39,960 --> 00:06:44,479 Speaker 3: the right place. Yeah, absolutely, you have found home. We 131 00:06:44,600 --> 00:06:47,040 Speaker 3: are definitely here to talk about it. But also so 132 00:06:47,080 --> 00:06:49,919 Speaker 3: many people when we ask that question, they forget that 133 00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:53,680 Speaker 3: they are already investors because they have superannuation. And it's 134 00:06:53,760 --> 00:06:56,880 Speaker 3: crazy how many people don't prioritize that given it is 135 00:06:57,080 --> 00:07:00,440 Speaker 3: forced savings. It is nine point five percent of your 136 00:07:00,480 --> 00:07:03,080 Speaker 3: income and in July it's going up to ten percent, 137 00:07:03,440 --> 00:07:05,400 Speaker 3: and so many of us could not say that we 138 00:07:05,520 --> 00:07:09,000 Speaker 3: saved ten percent on a regular basis or even invest 139 00:07:09,040 --> 00:07:11,720 Speaker 3: ten percent on a regular basis, when in reality, that 140 00:07:11,880 --> 00:07:15,160 Speaker 3: is what we are doing within superannuation. So it is 141 00:07:15,200 --> 00:07:17,720 Speaker 3: special and we do need to care about it. The 142 00:07:17,760 --> 00:07:20,680 Speaker 3: next question we actually already know the answer to, but 143 00:07:20,760 --> 00:07:23,000 Speaker 3: I'm going to ask a little bit more perfect questions 144 00:07:23,000 --> 00:07:25,560 Speaker 3: about it. It is, do you have any debts? 145 00:07:26,200 --> 00:07:28,520 Speaker 4: So yes, technically I do, so I still have my 146 00:07:28,560 --> 00:07:31,200 Speaker 4: hex debt that I'm paying off, but it's kind of taking. 147 00:07:30,960 --> 00:07:31,720 Speaker 1: Care of itself. 148 00:07:33,280 --> 00:07:36,040 Speaker 4: Two years ago my car completely died, but I was 149 00:07:36,080 --> 00:07:37,720 Speaker 4: in a really good position where I was able to 150 00:07:37,760 --> 00:07:42,280 Speaker 4: salary sacrifice and that actually worked out way more financially 151 00:07:42,680 --> 00:07:46,000 Speaker 4: better for me, and so. 152 00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:46,760 Speaker 1: I guess those two. 153 00:07:46,800 --> 00:07:49,120 Speaker 4: But yeah, I smashed out the rest of the other 154 00:07:49,200 --> 00:07:51,120 Speaker 4: debt what I classed is bad debt and just have 155 00:07:51,200 --> 00:07:52,360 Speaker 4: those two things remaining. 156 00:07:52,760 --> 00:07:56,360 Speaker 3: That is so exciting. Can ask about your bad debt 157 00:07:56,400 --> 00:07:58,600 Speaker 3: and how much bad debt you found yourself in. 158 00:07:59,480 --> 00:08:03,200 Speaker 4: So so it ended up capping at thirty three, eight 159 00:08:03,280 --> 00:08:07,360 Speaker 4: hundred and seventy six dollars. It was a combination of 160 00:08:08,080 --> 00:08:10,760 Speaker 4: Fortunately my ex partner took out loans in my name 161 00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:14,880 Speaker 4: and store credit cards and all sorts of bits and pieces. 162 00:08:15,520 --> 00:08:17,840 Speaker 1: I was lucky enough to actually bring it down to 163 00:08:17,880 --> 00:08:19,400 Speaker 1: that thirty three thousand dollars. 164 00:08:19,480 --> 00:08:25,560 Speaker 4: It was more than that, so I consolidated it into 165 00:08:25,680 --> 00:08:28,360 Speaker 4: a personal loan, so I wasn't copying twenty three percent 166 00:08:28,440 --> 00:08:34,480 Speaker 4: interest and then just attacked it horrendously hard. 167 00:08:35,920 --> 00:08:38,679 Speaker 3: Yeah, it's awful that you ended up in a situation 168 00:08:38,800 --> 00:08:42,520 Speaker 3: where someone like did that to you, took advantage of 169 00:08:42,600 --> 00:08:45,439 Speaker 3: you in that way. Yeah, that's really awful. How did 170 00:08:45,480 --> 00:08:48,160 Speaker 3: you find out about all of the store credits and 171 00:08:48,440 --> 00:08:49,480 Speaker 3: loans in your name? 172 00:08:51,200 --> 00:08:54,679 Speaker 4: I when we were ending the relationship and I had 173 00:08:54,679 --> 00:08:59,000 Speaker 4: to relocate for a new job, I was trying to 174 00:08:59,080 --> 00:09:02,600 Speaker 4: change addresses and get rental properties and I got knocked 175 00:09:02,600 --> 00:09:05,040 Speaker 4: back for a few rental properties for bad credit rating, 176 00:09:05,080 --> 00:09:07,760 Speaker 4: and I couldn't work out why. So I kind of 177 00:09:07,760 --> 00:09:10,000 Speaker 4: did some digging and some investigating, and it came up 178 00:09:11,120 --> 00:09:11,839 Speaker 4: with those things. 179 00:09:11,840 --> 00:09:15,240 Speaker 3: Wow, did you even ask your permission? It wasn't something 180 00:09:15,240 --> 00:09:17,400 Speaker 3: that he said, hey, I need these and you got 181 00:09:17,400 --> 00:09:21,320 Speaker 3: tricked into it. He literally just forged your name on things. 182 00:09:21,240 --> 00:09:24,280 Speaker 4: Correct, some of which I was recovering from an injury, 183 00:09:24,360 --> 00:09:26,840 Speaker 4: and I was heavily medicated at the time, so I 184 00:09:26,920 --> 00:09:32,439 Speaker 4: was in technicality. He was my care and yeah, he 185 00:09:32,480 --> 00:09:35,120 Speaker 4: did those things. So I said I was incoherent. Whether 186 00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:37,280 Speaker 4: or not I signed them because I was medicated or 187 00:09:37,320 --> 00:09:41,240 Speaker 4: he forged my signature, I honestly don't know. But yeah, 188 00:09:41,240 --> 00:09:42,920 Speaker 4: it was at a very dark period of my life 189 00:09:42,920 --> 00:09:44,640 Speaker 4: and he took full advantage of that. 190 00:09:45,520 --> 00:09:48,480 Speaker 5: And I go to hear that, I'm really sorry to 191 00:09:48,520 --> 00:09:51,320 Speaker 5: hear that, But that's exactly why we need to understand 192 00:09:51,320 --> 00:09:53,559 Speaker 5: what's on our credit score and what our credit history 193 00:09:53,600 --> 00:09:56,439 Speaker 5: actually looks like, because you didn't even know that they 194 00:09:56,440 --> 00:09:57,000 Speaker 5: were there. 195 00:09:56,920 --> 00:09:59,679 Speaker 3: Until you were forced to check because some other negative 196 00:09:59,720 --> 00:10:02,040 Speaker 3: things happened. So I think that this is a really 197 00:10:02,080 --> 00:10:04,679 Speaker 3: good reminder to just do a credit check and make 198 00:10:04,720 --> 00:10:07,720 Speaker 3: sure that you know what's on your credit history. And 199 00:10:07,800 --> 00:10:10,480 Speaker 3: I guess that opens a wider conversation about how do 200 00:10:10,520 --> 00:10:13,320 Speaker 3: we get people to take responsibility for things like that 201 00:10:13,440 --> 00:10:15,400 Speaker 3: and track it down. And you know, I'm sure you've 202 00:10:15,440 --> 00:10:18,240 Speaker 3: been through this and thought about the pros and cons, 203 00:10:18,280 --> 00:10:21,000 Speaker 3: and more often than not, because the documentation would have 204 00:10:21,080 --> 00:10:24,120 Speaker 3: quote had your signature on it, it's just too hard 205 00:10:24,160 --> 00:10:26,160 Speaker 3: to fight and you often just go, you know what, 206 00:10:26,480 --> 00:10:28,120 Speaker 3: I'm just going to move on. I'm going to pay 207 00:10:28,200 --> 00:10:30,920 Speaker 3: the debt. And it breaks my heart because that's put 208 00:10:30,960 --> 00:10:34,680 Speaker 3: you back financially. But in your personal situation, I'm just 209 00:10:34,760 --> 00:10:36,680 Speaker 3: so glad to hear you have a good income and 210 00:10:36,720 --> 00:10:38,840 Speaker 3: you've got the ability to save and now you're out 211 00:10:38,880 --> 00:10:42,480 Speaker 3: of that debt. Because it's just so unfair that those 212 00:10:42,520 --> 00:10:44,760 Speaker 3: things happen. And you know there are a lot of 213 00:10:44,800 --> 00:10:46,480 Speaker 3: places that can help, and I guess this is a 214 00:10:46,520 --> 00:10:49,199 Speaker 3: good place to plug our friends at the National Debt 215 00:10:49,240 --> 00:10:52,160 Speaker 3: Helpline and we'll put them in the show notes just 216 00:10:52,240 --> 00:10:55,240 Speaker 3: because they are angels and they help you through so 217 00:10:55,360 --> 00:10:59,040 Speaker 3: much stuff. They absolutely know where to go when things 218 00:10:59,080 --> 00:11:02,000 Speaker 3: like this are happening, because you feel lost and overwhelmed 219 00:11:02,040 --> 00:11:04,960 Speaker 3: and like nobody understands. So for me, if you're in 220 00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:07,640 Speaker 3: that situation, hit those guys up, and if you don't 221 00:11:07,640 --> 00:11:10,280 Speaker 3: feel comfortable to do that, please slide into my DMS 222 00:11:10,320 --> 00:11:12,959 Speaker 3: and I will help you find the right way. Let's 223 00:11:12,960 --> 00:11:16,440 Speaker 3: ask the next question, because we have absolutely sidelined this again. 224 00:11:16,640 --> 00:11:20,440 Speaker 3: Which is my favorite thing to do? What is your 225 00:11:20,480 --> 00:11:21,560 Speaker 3: best money habit? 226 00:11:22,960 --> 00:11:24,240 Speaker 1: My best money habit. 227 00:11:24,840 --> 00:11:28,200 Speaker 4: I am religious that when my paycheck comes in each 228 00:11:28,240 --> 00:11:31,680 Speaker 4: fortnite that I pay my bills straight up and I 229 00:11:31,800 --> 00:11:35,640 Speaker 4: put say fifty dollars or so into straight to the 230 00:11:35,679 --> 00:11:38,600 Speaker 4: power bill, even though I don't have it. I always 231 00:11:38,640 --> 00:11:42,480 Speaker 4: pay my bills and my rent straight up and then 232 00:11:42,559 --> 00:11:47,720 Speaker 4: allocate money to groceries or to pet bills. Or whatever 233 00:11:47,760 --> 00:11:50,719 Speaker 4: it might be, and stick to. 234 00:11:50,720 --> 00:11:51,880 Speaker 1: That great habit. 235 00:11:52,200 --> 00:11:55,520 Speaker 3: Such a good habit, sad habit. I love that habit. 236 00:11:56,360 --> 00:11:58,400 Speaker 1: I love it. It makes my basier. 237 00:11:58,679 --> 00:12:03,000 Speaker 3: It definitely does percent In contrast, what is your worst 238 00:12:03,080 --> 00:12:03,760 Speaker 3: money habit? 239 00:12:04,559 --> 00:12:06,520 Speaker 4: So I was thinking about this, and I'm just going 240 00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:09,560 Speaker 4: to preface it that it's not the same, but it's 241 00:12:09,559 --> 00:12:11,040 Speaker 4: going to sound the same as some of the other 242 00:12:11,120 --> 00:12:11,920 Speaker 4: money doorists. 243 00:12:12,520 --> 00:12:13,160 Speaker 1: Is food. 244 00:12:14,080 --> 00:12:17,880 Speaker 4: However, when I say that, I am a stickler for 245 00:12:18,640 --> 00:12:21,440 Speaker 4: if I purchased something, I think, can I get one 246 00:12:21,520 --> 00:12:22,560 Speaker 4: or two meals out of that? 247 00:12:22,920 --> 00:12:25,080 Speaker 1: Is that the best cost? 248 00:12:25,160 --> 00:12:27,680 Speaker 4: But it is bad in the sense that only just 249 00:12:27,720 --> 00:12:29,760 Speaker 4: the other day, I went for breakfast with my partner 250 00:12:29,760 --> 00:12:32,640 Speaker 4: at a lovely cafe and I couldn't finish the meal 251 00:12:32,679 --> 00:12:35,400 Speaker 4: and I wanted to take it home for a second serve, 252 00:12:35,880 --> 00:12:38,040 Speaker 4: and the lady said, no, we can't take it home 253 00:12:38,160 --> 00:12:40,000 Speaker 4: because it's got eggs in it and when allowed to 254 00:12:40,120 --> 00:12:43,199 Speaker 4: for hygiene, and I was like okay. And then when 255 00:12:43,240 --> 00:12:46,880 Speaker 4: we left, I burst into tears because I was like, 256 00:12:46,960 --> 00:12:50,600 Speaker 4: oh my gosh, I've just wasted another serving. And my 257 00:12:50,679 --> 00:12:52,720 Speaker 4: partner had to reassure me that I don't need to 258 00:12:52,720 --> 00:12:55,400 Speaker 4: be in that mindset. Anymore that I can afford another meal. 259 00:12:57,160 --> 00:12:59,640 Speaker 4: But that's still something like a bad habit I have 260 00:12:59,720 --> 00:13:01,679 Speaker 4: that I'm I'm like, Okay, how much is this going 261 00:13:01,760 --> 00:13:04,840 Speaker 4: to cost? Can I is that enough food to feed me? 262 00:13:06,280 --> 00:13:08,920 Speaker 4: And yeah, it's something I'm trying to change. 263 00:13:09,280 --> 00:13:12,160 Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, that is not a worst habit at all. 264 00:13:12,440 --> 00:13:15,160 Speaker 2: No, I think it's that's not bad from what you've 265 00:13:15,200 --> 00:13:19,360 Speaker 2: been through in your life. That's that's just trauma. That's 266 00:13:19,480 --> 00:13:23,120 Speaker 2: just from you living try meal to meal. You can't 267 00:13:23,120 --> 00:13:25,720 Speaker 2: be hard on yourself for that. That's just you went 268 00:13:25,760 --> 00:13:28,920 Speaker 2: through something that, like I mean, unfortunately lots of people 269 00:13:28,960 --> 00:13:32,640 Speaker 2: go through, but that most people wouldn't understand, especially now 270 00:13:32,679 --> 00:13:35,040 Speaker 2: that you're in a different part of your life where 271 00:13:35,080 --> 00:13:37,440 Speaker 2: you know, you've got a great job and a secure job, 272 00:13:37,480 --> 00:13:39,600 Speaker 2: and I could bet that not a lot of people 273 00:13:39,600 --> 00:13:42,200 Speaker 2: that you're working with now have ever been through that 274 00:13:42,360 --> 00:13:43,640 Speaker 2: or had to think in that way. 275 00:13:44,120 --> 00:13:46,120 Speaker 1: So I just don't want you to be so hard 276 00:13:46,120 --> 00:13:47,240 Speaker 1: on yourself. 277 00:13:46,800 --> 00:13:49,880 Speaker 3: Because that is not a worst money habit and bad 278 00:13:49,960 --> 00:13:53,280 Speaker 3: habit at all. As much as it's probably come from 279 00:13:53,280 --> 00:13:56,559 Speaker 3: a traumatic past, we could definitely all learn a little 280 00:13:56,559 --> 00:14:00,240 Speaker 3: bit from that. I always overorder it cafes and that is, 281 00:14:00,280 --> 00:14:04,760 Speaker 3: you know, me showing my privilege, but it just isn't necessary. 282 00:14:04,800 --> 00:14:07,400 Speaker 3: Like we definitely could all take a leaf out of 283 00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:09,400 Speaker 3: your book and only order what we need and have 284 00:14:09,480 --> 00:14:11,880 Speaker 3: a really good think about the things that we are purchasing, 285 00:14:12,040 --> 00:14:14,240 Speaker 3: because that could lead to really good money habits for 286 00:14:14,360 --> 00:14:18,640 Speaker 3: all of us. All right, next and last question before 287 00:14:18,640 --> 00:14:21,560 Speaker 3: we get to have a really deep conversation. What grade 288 00:14:21,600 --> 00:14:23,400 Speaker 3: would you give yourself if I forced you to give 289 00:14:23,440 --> 00:14:28,840 Speaker 3: yourself a money grade. 290 00:14:27,400 --> 00:14:29,760 Speaker 1: A couple of weeks ago. I think I would say 291 00:14:29,960 --> 00:14:30,960 Speaker 1: a B plus. 292 00:14:31,880 --> 00:14:35,600 Speaker 4: Right now, I couldn't give myself a grade because, like 293 00:14:35,640 --> 00:14:38,520 Speaker 4: I said, I'm starting a new chapter, so I'm not 294 00:14:38,560 --> 00:14:39,920 Speaker 4: sure what my money habits. 295 00:14:39,640 --> 00:14:40,960 Speaker 1: Are going to be from here on out. 296 00:14:42,000 --> 00:14:45,800 Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, that is so that annoys me because 297 00:14:45,880 --> 00:14:48,320 Speaker 3: you and my eyes, you're a straight a. I mean, 298 00:14:48,480 --> 00:14:52,080 Speaker 3: you're not investing yet properly. You're doing supers, so maybe 299 00:14:52,120 --> 00:14:54,640 Speaker 3: not a plus. But like you've gotten out of debt, 300 00:14:54,680 --> 00:14:57,080 Speaker 3: You've gone through so much, and you're still in this 301 00:14:57,120 --> 00:14:59,840 Speaker 3: position where you have this epic income that you have 302 00:15:00,080 --> 00:15:03,040 Speaker 3: worked your butt off to deserve. Oh nah, you're in 303 00:15:03,200 --> 00:15:06,800 Speaker 3: a mean, you don't get one? Oh who is she? 304 00:15:08,280 --> 00:15:10,520 Speaker 1: I just figured for you know, my new chapter of 305 00:15:11,480 --> 00:15:14,040 Speaker 1: my money in life. I guess I don't know what 306 00:15:14,120 --> 00:15:14,520 Speaker 1: it will be. 307 00:15:14,800 --> 00:15:16,960 Speaker 3: So yeah, look. 308 00:15:17,240 --> 00:15:20,480 Speaker 5: You're starting with an amazing clean, slight yes exactly. 309 00:15:20,800 --> 00:15:23,160 Speaker 3: How exciting getting out of debt and then getting a 310 00:15:23,160 --> 00:15:25,760 Speaker 3: brand new job all in the one period of time. 311 00:15:25,920 --> 00:15:28,200 Speaker 3: I'm so excited and I'm going to ask you so 312 00:15:28,240 --> 00:15:39,400 Speaker 3: many questions about it right after this quick break, I 313 00:15:39,480 --> 00:15:42,120 Speaker 3: have so many questions for you. I feel like your 314 00:15:42,160 --> 00:15:46,120 Speaker 3: story is so impressive. And before this recording, Tony was like, 315 00:15:46,160 --> 00:15:48,680 Speaker 3: oh my gosh, Victoria, You're going to love hearing this one. 316 00:15:48,720 --> 00:15:52,560 Speaker 3: There is so much to it. How did this eventuate? 317 00:15:52,600 --> 00:15:55,480 Speaker 3: You got kicked out at fourteen? You are facing some 318 00:15:55,560 --> 00:15:58,800 Speaker 3: serious adversity when it comes to you. Mentioned before you 319 00:15:58,800 --> 00:16:01,480 Speaker 3: have a number of syndromes, and I think you said Erlin's. 320 00:16:01,600 --> 00:16:04,320 Speaker 3: Is that the one where you have light sensitivity? 321 00:16:05,000 --> 00:16:08,880 Speaker 4: So it's a visual processing disorder. So basically my eyes 322 00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:12,880 Speaker 4: don't speak to my brain at the right speed. So 323 00:16:13,040 --> 00:16:16,760 Speaker 4: for me personally, I have light sensitivity. I'm dyslexic, I 324 00:16:16,800 --> 00:16:22,560 Speaker 4: have depth perception issues. It causes migraines, very painful eyes. 325 00:16:24,360 --> 00:16:26,400 Speaker 1: I don't pick up things quick. 326 00:16:26,520 --> 00:16:30,480 Speaker 4: So for example, you might read a book and smash 327 00:16:30,520 --> 00:16:32,240 Speaker 4: it out in a day. It takes me two weeks 328 00:16:32,240 --> 00:16:33,560 Speaker 4: to read it because I've got to read the line 329 00:16:33,560 --> 00:16:39,040 Speaker 4: over and over and over again. Every person's different. You 330 00:16:39,280 --> 00:16:41,960 Speaker 4: most likely see people that have blue lenses or pink 331 00:16:42,040 --> 00:16:46,280 Speaker 4: lenses like Elton John, but for me, mine are really 332 00:16:46,400 --> 00:16:50,120 Speaker 4: dark because my light sensitivity is quite intense. 333 00:16:51,400 --> 00:16:55,080 Speaker 1: But yeah, it caused learning difficulties because for. 334 00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:57,520 Speaker 4: Me, the pages were blank, there was no writing on them, 335 00:16:57,560 --> 00:16:59,240 Speaker 4: there's no lines on them. 336 00:16:59,280 --> 00:16:59,960 Speaker 1: I couldn't see it. 337 00:17:00,880 --> 00:17:03,320 Speaker 4: And unfortunately I didn't get my diagnosis until I was 338 00:17:03,360 --> 00:17:03,880 Speaker 4: an adult. 339 00:17:04,040 --> 00:17:06,399 Speaker 3: So I was going to ask how old were you 340 00:17:06,480 --> 00:17:09,360 Speaker 3: when you found out you had this, because that would 341 00:17:09,400 --> 00:17:12,200 Speaker 3: be seriously debilitating growing up, right. 342 00:17:12,800 --> 00:17:16,240 Speaker 4: So I was grade ten when they thought I was 343 00:17:16,320 --> 00:17:20,399 Speaker 4: dyslexic and got a little bit of assistance then, But 344 00:17:20,440 --> 00:17:24,200 Speaker 4: it wasn't until I was actually twenty two and got 345 00:17:24,200 --> 00:17:27,920 Speaker 4: my formal diagnosis and got my first set of Erlin's lenses, 346 00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:30,760 Speaker 4: and oh my gosh, I remember saying to the lady, 347 00:17:30,880 --> 00:17:32,359 Speaker 4: Oh that's what the world looks like. 348 00:17:32,840 --> 00:17:38,080 Speaker 1: Okay, yeah, it changed my life. It's so special. 349 00:17:38,280 --> 00:17:42,040 Speaker 4: Yeah, I can't even explain the feeling to be able 350 00:17:42,080 --> 00:17:44,800 Speaker 4: to see things at a certain depth or a certain color, 351 00:17:45,040 --> 00:17:47,560 Speaker 4: or read a page and not get a headache, or 352 00:17:47,640 --> 00:17:51,879 Speaker 4: sit down and read a book and actually enjoy it. Yeah, 353 00:17:52,240 --> 00:17:53,720 Speaker 4: it literally changed my life. 354 00:17:54,080 --> 00:17:57,040 Speaker 3: That is so cool and so upsetting that you didn't 355 00:17:57,080 --> 00:18:01,600 Speaker 3: get that diagnosis earlier. How did you come about finding that? Like, 356 00:18:01,680 --> 00:18:04,040 Speaker 3: if people are listening to this and you know they've 357 00:18:04,040 --> 00:18:06,639 Speaker 3: been really struggling, was there a certain test or was 358 00:18:06,680 --> 00:18:09,239 Speaker 3: there something that you know triggered it, or was it 359 00:18:09,320 --> 00:18:11,600 Speaker 3: just you going there has to be something else going 360 00:18:11,640 --> 00:18:13,720 Speaker 3: on here kind of. 361 00:18:13,920 --> 00:18:16,359 Speaker 4: Just saying there has to be something else. And I 362 00:18:16,440 --> 00:18:20,159 Speaker 4: did have dyslexia glasses, so they had a light colored 363 00:18:20,160 --> 00:18:22,960 Speaker 4: tint and I went back to the optometrist and they said, no, no, no, no, 364 00:18:23,200 --> 00:18:26,920 Speaker 4: we don't do that testing anymore. Have you considered going 365 00:18:26,920 --> 00:18:28,200 Speaker 4: to an Erlin specialist? 366 00:18:28,280 --> 00:18:29,960 Speaker 1: And I was like, what on earth is that? 367 00:18:30,520 --> 00:18:32,520 Speaker 4: And he told me, and he showed me some examples 368 00:18:32,560 --> 00:18:36,679 Speaker 4: of videos of where writing spins on the page or 369 00:18:36,960 --> 00:18:40,680 Speaker 4: fuzzes or it disappears off the page, and he sent 370 00:18:40,720 --> 00:18:44,199 Speaker 4: me through to this Erlin specialist who then did testing. 371 00:18:44,240 --> 00:18:46,280 Speaker 4: And you have to do like a reading test and 372 00:18:46,320 --> 00:18:50,600 Speaker 4: a writing test, and it can also be auditory. So 373 00:18:51,080 --> 00:18:53,160 Speaker 4: all those sorts of things, and then she started putting 374 00:18:54,240 --> 00:18:59,359 Speaker 4: colored overlays on the page and layering things up, and yeah, 375 00:18:59,520 --> 00:19:02,280 Speaker 4: found out that way. It took about I think the 376 00:19:02,320 --> 00:19:05,920 Speaker 4: session was about four hours in total. 377 00:19:06,400 --> 00:19:06,920 Speaker 3: Wow. 378 00:19:07,560 --> 00:19:07,919 Speaker 1: Yeah. 379 00:19:07,960 --> 00:19:11,440 Speaker 4: And they provide you with like water and breaks and 380 00:19:11,520 --> 00:19:13,439 Speaker 4: all sorts of bits and pieces because they know it 381 00:19:13,480 --> 00:19:15,360 Speaker 4: can fatigue you quite horrendously. 382 00:19:16,359 --> 00:19:17,800 Speaker 1: And then you've got to send the glasses a way 383 00:19:17,800 --> 00:19:18,480 Speaker 1: to get made and. 384 00:19:18,400 --> 00:19:19,040 Speaker 3: That kind of thing. 385 00:19:19,160 --> 00:19:22,680 Speaker 1: So there are Erlin specialists around. But it is. 386 00:19:22,640 --> 00:19:26,840 Speaker 4: Normally diagnosed when you're a child and through school that 387 00:19:26,960 --> 00:19:29,680 Speaker 4: kind of thing. But when I was growing up, it 388 00:19:29,760 --> 00:19:32,480 Speaker 4: basically didn't exist, so there was no way to test 389 00:19:32,520 --> 00:19:35,160 Speaker 4: for it because yeah, they just didn't exist. 390 00:19:35,480 --> 00:19:39,040 Speaker 3: Oh my gosh. Well, I'm glad that you've been diagnosed now. 391 00:19:39,040 --> 00:19:41,800 Speaker 2: And at that point when you were diagnosed, had you 392 00:19:41,880 --> 00:19:43,639 Speaker 2: were you at UNI at this point. 393 00:19:44,119 --> 00:19:48,200 Speaker 4: Yeah, so I was part way through and almost into 394 00:19:48,200 --> 00:19:49,480 Speaker 4: my second degree by that point. 395 00:19:49,920 --> 00:19:53,760 Speaker 2: That must have totally changed your experience after having gone 396 00:19:53,800 --> 00:19:56,000 Speaker 2: through all that time while you were at UNI and 397 00:19:56,040 --> 00:20:00,359 Speaker 2: you were physically unable to really do what other people 398 00:20:00,359 --> 00:20:02,679 Speaker 2: could do and at the same speeds and stuff. I 399 00:20:02,680 --> 00:20:05,560 Speaker 2: mean high school and school is one thing, but UNI 400 00:20:05,720 --> 00:20:07,800 Speaker 2: is so intense. 401 00:20:08,400 --> 00:20:09,120 Speaker 3: That's crazy. 402 00:20:09,359 --> 00:20:12,119 Speaker 2: Did you feel a total difference between the way that 403 00:20:12,160 --> 00:20:14,240 Speaker 2: you learn and the way that you felt about being 404 00:20:14,280 --> 00:20:18,480 Speaker 2: at UNI from the first half of your studies to 405 00:20:18,640 --> 00:20:20,000 Speaker 2: after being diagnosed. 406 00:20:20,160 --> 00:20:20,400 Speaker 1: Yeah. 407 00:20:20,600 --> 00:20:21,040 Speaker 5: So I. 408 00:20:23,440 --> 00:20:26,239 Speaker 4: Was studying full time, I was working full time, and 409 00:20:26,320 --> 00:20:29,600 Speaker 4: I was running an organization that looked after the student welfare, 410 00:20:29,600 --> 00:20:34,040 Speaker 4: which had full time hours but volunteer base, and I 411 00:20:34,160 --> 00:20:39,159 Speaker 4: ran on very little sleep and just coffee all the time. Afterwards, 412 00:20:39,320 --> 00:20:42,280 Speaker 4: I actually cut down my coffee intake and I was 413 00:20:42,320 --> 00:20:45,960 Speaker 4: able to sleep more. And you know, I knew that 414 00:20:46,000 --> 00:20:48,240 Speaker 4: I could say, be cheeky and write an essay the 415 00:20:48,320 --> 00:20:50,840 Speaker 4: night before instead of thinking I've got to start the 416 00:20:50,920 --> 00:20:54,119 Speaker 4: day it's issued and take the full six seven, eight 417 00:20:54,240 --> 00:20:58,119 Speaker 4: nine weeks to do it. It meant that I was 418 00:20:58,160 --> 00:21:02,400 Speaker 4: able to do my trimesters and get my degree done 419 00:21:02,440 --> 00:21:05,520 Speaker 4: a little bit quicker than I wanted to, and that 420 00:21:05,640 --> 00:21:06,840 Speaker 4: I actually went on and did. 421 00:21:06,800 --> 00:21:07,680 Speaker 1: A second degree. 422 00:21:07,720 --> 00:21:10,320 Speaker 4: And I've gone on to do further studies since then, 423 00:21:10,400 --> 00:21:13,199 Speaker 4: which I never thought i'd do because it at the 424 00:21:13,200 --> 00:21:16,280 Speaker 4: time would physically hurt and be too tiring for me. 425 00:21:16,840 --> 00:21:19,159 Speaker 1: So it really changed everything I could do. 426 00:21:19,640 --> 00:21:23,879 Speaker 3: I'm beyond in or like you are so smart, like 427 00:21:23,960 --> 00:21:26,480 Speaker 3: to have gone through all of that and still be 428 00:21:26,560 --> 00:21:29,600 Speaker 3: able to do it, like people struggle with UNI and 429 00:21:29,640 --> 00:21:33,159 Speaker 3: they don't have any learning difficulties or learning disabilities. And 430 00:21:33,480 --> 00:21:36,840 Speaker 3: something that I'm really grateful for because I did study psychology, 431 00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:39,840 Speaker 3: is the knowledge that a learning difficulty or a disability 432 00:21:39,840 --> 00:21:43,040 Speaker 3: doesn't actually mean a lack of intelligence. And so often 433 00:21:43,119 --> 00:21:46,480 Speaker 3: people immediately think, oh, learning difficulty, they must just not 434 00:21:46,600 --> 00:21:48,560 Speaker 3: be as smart, and that is not the case. And 435 00:21:48,600 --> 00:21:52,320 Speaker 3: you are absolutely proving that having gone through such adversity 436 00:21:52,359 --> 00:21:55,840 Speaker 3: and must have been so challenging, especially to the level 437 00:21:55,880 --> 00:21:59,480 Speaker 3: that you experience it, to still have degrees, to still 438 00:21:59,520 --> 00:22:02,760 Speaker 3: have gone in done further education. And let's just point 439 00:22:02,800 --> 00:22:06,120 Speaker 3: out that you earned eighty eight thousand dollars a year 440 00:22:06,560 --> 00:22:10,200 Speaker 3: like that is impressive, like seriously impressive. 441 00:22:09,800 --> 00:22:13,560 Speaker 1: Especially a lot of money. It's oh my gosh. Even 442 00:22:13,640 --> 00:22:16,240 Speaker 1: you're saying it's a lot, like it's too much, take 443 00:22:16,240 --> 00:22:18,040 Speaker 1: it away. I don't know. 444 00:22:18,160 --> 00:22:19,919 Speaker 3: You sent every single cent of that. 445 00:22:20,480 --> 00:22:23,560 Speaker 4: It's like, yeah, I remember thinking fifty five thousands a lot, 446 00:22:23,640 --> 00:22:24,200 Speaker 4: and I would. 447 00:22:24,440 --> 00:22:26,480 Speaker 1: I was happy to have that. And then when I 448 00:22:26,560 --> 00:22:27,080 Speaker 1: landed this. 449 00:22:27,080 --> 00:22:28,800 Speaker 4: Job and they told me the wage and that it 450 00:22:28,840 --> 00:22:30,639 Speaker 4: goes up every x amount of years. 451 00:22:30,640 --> 00:22:32,960 Speaker 1: I was like, excuse me, you want to pay me what? 452 00:22:33,520 --> 00:22:36,480 Speaker 1: And it's permanent, full time sign on the doted line. Yes, 453 00:22:36,520 --> 00:22:37,000 Speaker 1: thank you. 454 00:22:39,720 --> 00:22:41,840 Speaker 3: I'm so proud of it. I love that for you 455 00:22:41,960 --> 00:22:44,600 Speaker 3: and you absolutely deserve it. Can you tell us a 456 00:22:44,680 --> 00:22:47,960 Speaker 3: little bit more about your finance history, Like we've obviously 457 00:22:48,119 --> 00:22:51,159 Speaker 3: had a really good chat about disability, but let's have 458 00:22:51,240 --> 00:22:54,359 Speaker 3: a chat about you know, going through financial abuse and 459 00:22:54,359 --> 00:22:56,720 Speaker 3: what that felt like and coming out the other side. 460 00:22:56,800 --> 00:22:59,560 Speaker 3: Like you, you come across as a really happy, really 461 00:22:59,560 --> 00:23:01,800 Speaker 3: fun that I want to be friends with, But I'm 462 00:23:01,840 --> 00:23:04,879 Speaker 3: sure that's not how you've always felt. So can you 463 00:23:04,960 --> 00:23:07,880 Speaker 3: explain I guess finding out about that, what you did 464 00:23:07,920 --> 00:23:10,000 Speaker 3: about that, and how that really impacted you. 465 00:23:12,640 --> 00:23:15,880 Speaker 1: It sucks. I can't put it any other way. It sucked. 466 00:23:16,400 --> 00:23:21,240 Speaker 4: I had gone through some hell throughout my life previously, 467 00:23:21,440 --> 00:23:22,480 Speaker 4: and I was like, oh, you know. 468 00:23:22,880 --> 00:23:24,280 Speaker 1: Got over that and I can deal with that. 469 00:23:24,359 --> 00:23:27,320 Speaker 4: And then this was kind of the final blow when 470 00:23:27,320 --> 00:23:29,080 Speaker 4: I thought I was starting to get my life together 471 00:23:29,119 --> 00:23:32,560 Speaker 4: with my career and my UNI and finding out who 472 00:23:32,560 --> 00:23:36,200 Speaker 4: I was as a person after some injuries and whatnot, 473 00:23:37,160 --> 00:23:40,440 Speaker 4: and it was the final blow. I did get into 474 00:23:40,480 --> 00:23:42,920 Speaker 4: a very very dark place mentally. 475 00:23:42,680 --> 00:23:44,760 Speaker 1: I'm not going to lie about that. I'm very open 476 00:23:44,800 --> 00:23:45,199 Speaker 1: about that. 477 00:23:46,000 --> 00:23:50,440 Speaker 4: And I sought out some psychology interventions and. 478 00:23:50,440 --> 00:23:52,560 Speaker 1: I put all the finance in the back burner. I 479 00:23:52,560 --> 00:23:54,000 Speaker 1: caught all the companies. 480 00:23:54,040 --> 00:23:57,760 Speaker 4: I was like, I need you to suspend payments, and look, 481 00:23:57,760 --> 00:23:59,679 Speaker 4: I'll pay it, like you said earlier. 482 00:23:59,720 --> 00:24:00,520 Speaker 1: Sometimes it was. 483 00:24:00,480 --> 00:24:02,600 Speaker 4: Easier to just to copy it on the chin and 484 00:24:03,240 --> 00:24:05,879 Speaker 4: you know, technically my name was on it, so technically 485 00:24:05,880 --> 00:24:06,440 Speaker 4: it was mine. 486 00:24:06,520 --> 00:24:09,439 Speaker 1: But after a little while I did reach out to 487 00:24:09,440 --> 00:24:10,840 Speaker 1: the debt. 488 00:24:10,680 --> 00:24:13,120 Speaker 4: Hotline and had a really long chat with them and 489 00:24:13,320 --> 00:24:17,520 Speaker 4: a few phone calls with them, and yeah, they were fantastic. 490 00:24:17,600 --> 00:24:20,120 Speaker 4: They gave me so much guidance and how I could 491 00:24:20,160 --> 00:24:22,840 Speaker 4: consolidate it and certain ones that I could stop, and 492 00:24:22,880 --> 00:24:24,000 Speaker 4: certain ones like if. 493 00:24:23,840 --> 00:24:26,280 Speaker 1: I wanted to go to court over it, or you know, 494 00:24:26,359 --> 00:24:27,840 Speaker 1: what the ramifications would be. 495 00:24:28,040 --> 00:24:31,720 Speaker 4: And I just had to really sit down and think 496 00:24:31,800 --> 00:24:34,359 Speaker 4: and be like, Okay, the plan is to pay X 497 00:24:34,400 --> 00:24:37,840 Speaker 4: amount every fortnight and that will leave me with this 498 00:24:38,000 --> 00:24:39,800 Speaker 4: much for groceries and bills. 499 00:24:40,080 --> 00:24:43,040 Speaker 1: All right, we can do this. But yeah, for a 500 00:24:43,080 --> 00:24:46,200 Speaker 1: while there it was I just accepted that I would 501 00:24:46,280 --> 00:24:47,119 Speaker 1: forever be in debt. 502 00:24:47,240 --> 00:24:48,919 Speaker 4: That was going to just be a bill for me, 503 00:24:49,240 --> 00:24:52,080 Speaker 4: and that was, you know, as common as paying rent. 504 00:24:52,359 --> 00:24:55,040 Speaker 1: But yeah, it knocked me. It really did knock me. 505 00:24:55,880 --> 00:24:58,920 Speaker 4: And as I started to chip it down and see 506 00:24:58,960 --> 00:25:01,639 Speaker 4: the end, every time I get a little bit closer 507 00:25:01,640 --> 00:25:04,119 Speaker 4: to pay me in, something unexpected will come up. 508 00:25:04,200 --> 00:25:06,480 Speaker 1: Like my dog landed in major surgery. 509 00:25:06,520 --> 00:25:09,720 Speaker 4: So I got sick again and it got a bit frustrating, 510 00:25:09,720 --> 00:25:12,080 Speaker 4: and I remember thinking I was so angry at this 511 00:25:12,119 --> 00:25:15,880 Speaker 4: person for doing this to me, But in a way, 512 00:25:15,920 --> 00:25:18,600 Speaker 4: I was actually kind of grateful. It made me to 513 00:25:18,600 --> 00:25:23,000 Speaker 4: be quite tenacious and quiet. Money set that I needed 514 00:25:23,000 --> 00:25:24,320 Speaker 4: to actually focus on money. 515 00:25:24,320 --> 00:25:26,720 Speaker 1: It wasn't just coming and going. I had to put 516 00:25:26,720 --> 00:25:28,240 Speaker 1: my head down and. 517 00:25:28,400 --> 00:25:32,480 Speaker 4: Work out a budget that worked for me so I 518 00:25:32,520 --> 00:25:33,920 Speaker 4: could run him over. 519 00:25:34,160 --> 00:25:37,320 Speaker 1: Don't get me wrong, but I'm kind of grateful for 520 00:25:37,359 --> 00:25:38,000 Speaker 1: the skill. 521 00:25:38,520 --> 00:25:41,440 Speaker 3: Brand I could too. I'll be in the passenger say 522 00:25:41,640 --> 00:25:46,040 Speaker 3: don't you worry too too? Yeah, no, I totally get that. 523 00:25:46,160 --> 00:25:48,119 Speaker 3: And I think that that's something that a lot of 524 00:25:48,160 --> 00:25:50,280 Speaker 3: people say, well, why didn't you take him to court? 525 00:25:50,280 --> 00:25:52,280 Speaker 3: Why didn't you follow it up? And I think that 526 00:25:52,400 --> 00:25:55,359 Speaker 3: so many people who have actually been through this, they've 527 00:25:55,400 --> 00:25:58,720 Speaker 3: got enough emotional stress hanging over them. They are going 528 00:25:58,760 --> 00:26:01,840 Speaker 3: through so much trauma point in time that they just go, 529 00:26:01,960 --> 00:26:04,520 Speaker 3: you know what, I can't put myself through that. So 530 00:26:04,600 --> 00:26:07,040 Speaker 3: you absolutely can't judge where somebody is at or the 531 00:26:07,080 --> 00:26:10,199 Speaker 3: decisions they make until you've experienced something similar. And I 532 00:26:10,240 --> 00:26:12,680 Speaker 3: think that that's a really important lesson and a really 533 00:26:12,720 --> 00:26:15,400 Speaker 3: important story to come out of this that one. There 534 00:26:15,480 --> 00:26:18,120 Speaker 3: is support, like our friends at the National Debt Hotline, 535 00:26:18,160 --> 00:26:21,320 Speaker 3: which I love them, And I think it's so funny 536 00:26:21,480 --> 00:26:24,320 Speaker 3: because you know, you go to their website and their 537 00:26:24,320 --> 00:26:27,359 Speaker 3: website's not that attractive if we're honest, like it looks 538 00:26:27,359 --> 00:26:29,560 Speaker 3: a bit dry, and you're like, oh, I just want 539 00:26:29,600 --> 00:26:32,800 Speaker 3: someone who's empathetic in kind, but they are, like they 540 00:26:32,840 --> 00:26:35,679 Speaker 3: are the kindest people. And you get connected with a 541 00:26:35,760 --> 00:26:38,600 Speaker 3: free financial counselor who will explain to you all your 542 00:26:38,600 --> 00:26:41,600 Speaker 3: options and really hold your hand through that process. I 543 00:26:41,680 --> 00:26:44,479 Speaker 3: promise you it's not nearly as dry as their website looks, 544 00:26:44,640 --> 00:26:48,000 Speaker 3: because they are genuinely so caring and so helpful. So 545 00:26:48,040 --> 00:26:50,480 Speaker 3: I'm glad that you had them as a resource. 546 00:26:50,119 --> 00:26:53,440 Speaker 6: And free of judgment as well, free judgment and free 547 00:26:53,440 --> 00:26:56,919 Speaker 6: of charge, like their services are free as well, Like 548 00:26:57,280 --> 00:27:00,280 Speaker 6: you don't have to pay them which is so cool 549 00:27:00,440 --> 00:27:04,120 Speaker 6: and so kind, and yeah, I adore them. 550 00:27:04,160 --> 00:27:05,040 Speaker 3: I'm obsessed with them. 551 00:27:05,119 --> 00:27:06,040 Speaker 1: They were fantastic. 552 00:27:06,320 --> 00:27:08,040 Speaker 3: Yeah. I send a lot of people that reach out 553 00:27:08,040 --> 00:27:09,399 Speaker 3: to me who are in a bit of a pickle. 554 00:27:09,440 --> 00:27:12,160 Speaker 3: To them, I'm like, look these guys. I know it's 555 00:27:12,200 --> 00:27:14,480 Speaker 3: a hotline and it doesn't sound as good, but you'll 556 00:27:14,520 --> 00:27:17,800 Speaker 3: be connected with a free financial counselor usually in your area, 557 00:27:17,880 --> 00:27:21,800 Speaker 3: and it's just genuinely so special. So having gone through 558 00:27:21,840 --> 00:27:25,000 Speaker 3: what you've gone through, now you're in a much better position. 559 00:27:25,240 --> 00:27:28,320 Speaker 3: You've got a partner. Now are you leaving with your partner? 560 00:27:28,480 --> 00:27:30,080 Speaker 3: What's the situation there? 561 00:27:30,680 --> 00:27:34,320 Speaker 4: No, So I it's coming up one year with him, 562 00:27:34,440 --> 00:27:35,520 Speaker 4: which is exciting. 563 00:27:37,080 --> 00:27:38,360 Speaker 1: We have been. 564 00:27:38,160 --> 00:27:42,440 Speaker 4: Doing technically a long distance relationship and I'm actually about 565 00:27:42,480 --> 00:27:44,200 Speaker 4: to move in the coming days to be about ten 566 00:27:44,200 --> 00:27:46,719 Speaker 4: minutes around the corner from him. 567 00:27:46,920 --> 00:27:50,080 Speaker 3: Oh that's where you're movie kind of Yeah. 568 00:27:50,160 --> 00:27:54,360 Speaker 4: So we had the chat that should we move in together, 569 00:27:54,600 --> 00:27:58,440 Speaker 4: and you know, financially it'd be great. And we sat 570 00:27:58,520 --> 00:28:02,080 Speaker 4: down very early on in our relationship actually and discuss finances. 571 00:28:02,119 --> 00:28:04,800 Speaker 4: And I was very open about it because I recently 572 00:28:04,800 --> 00:28:06,919 Speaker 4: listened to your episode about STDs. 573 00:28:07,359 --> 00:28:10,280 Speaker 1: I was like, this is my situation. 574 00:28:11,560 --> 00:28:13,560 Speaker 4: But I said, look, I'd like to kind of just 575 00:28:13,640 --> 00:28:15,439 Speaker 4: be in the area and find my feet first, and 576 00:28:15,480 --> 00:28:19,679 Speaker 4: then maybe in six twelve months we can explore moving 577 00:28:19,680 --> 00:28:20,159 Speaker 4: in together. 578 00:28:20,400 --> 00:28:22,240 Speaker 1: But I'm so proud. 579 00:28:21,920 --> 00:28:25,119 Speaker 2: Of you for having that honest chat, because it is 580 00:28:25,200 --> 00:28:27,520 Speaker 2: so easy to get caught up in the excitement of 581 00:28:27,600 --> 00:28:30,280 Speaker 2: moving in with and your boyfriend or girlfriend or whatever 582 00:28:30,720 --> 00:28:32,560 Speaker 2: and being like, you know what, it doesn't matter, We'll 583 00:28:32,600 --> 00:28:33,240 Speaker 2: just move in together. 584 00:28:33,280 --> 00:28:33,800 Speaker 1: It'll be great. 585 00:28:33,840 --> 00:28:35,480 Speaker 2: We can wake up every morning and have a coffee 586 00:28:35,560 --> 00:28:38,960 Speaker 2: together when it's actually so much harder to go. Hang on, 587 00:28:39,400 --> 00:28:42,520 Speaker 2: let's be smart about this, let's protect ourselves. Have the 588 00:28:42,560 --> 00:28:46,280 Speaker 2: conversation so especially, I guess, after what you've been through 589 00:28:46,320 --> 00:28:47,880 Speaker 2: your life, I'm not going to put myself in a 590 00:28:47,960 --> 00:28:51,680 Speaker 2: vulnerable position again. And we could talk to you for 591 00:28:51,800 --> 00:28:54,440 Speaker 2: hours and hours, but I guess I just want to know, 592 00:28:54,480 --> 00:28:56,680 Speaker 2: is there anything else that you'd like to share For 593 00:28:57,080 --> 00:28:59,600 Speaker 2: anybody that's a thing that might find themselves in a 594 00:28:59,640 --> 00:29:02,160 Speaker 2: situation that's similar to what you've been through. 595 00:29:04,160 --> 00:29:08,920 Speaker 4: I think just be confident in yourself and give yourself time. 596 00:29:09,400 --> 00:29:14,200 Speaker 1: If I've said to people in the past like it was. 597 00:29:14,200 --> 00:29:17,360 Speaker 4: Hell, and I laugh it off now and everyone goes. Oh, 598 00:29:17,360 --> 00:29:21,440 Speaker 4: you should be proud of yourself and it's hard. Be 599 00:29:21,560 --> 00:29:25,560 Speaker 4: ready for a hard road, but be assuring yourself that 600 00:29:25,760 --> 00:29:27,720 Speaker 4: you can get through it. There are people out there, 601 00:29:27,720 --> 00:29:33,240 Speaker 4: there is the services out there. Just give yourself time, 602 00:29:33,640 --> 00:29:37,480 Speaker 4: be gentle with yourself and you know if it takes 603 00:29:37,480 --> 00:29:39,680 Speaker 4: you one year, five years, twenty years, you will get 604 00:29:39,720 --> 00:29:40,000 Speaker 4: through that. 605 00:29:40,160 --> 00:29:42,960 Speaker 1: It just yeah, be kind to yourself. 606 00:29:43,120 --> 00:29:45,320 Speaker 3: I love that. That is such a perfect place to 607 00:29:45,440 --> 00:29:48,320 Speaker 3: leave this. Thank you so much for joining us. 608 00:29:48,680 --> 00:29:50,600 Speaker 1: No, thank you. It's been amazing to chat. 609 00:29:50,920 --> 00:29:53,240 Speaker 3: That's an epic journey and we are so proud of you. 610 00:29:53,280 --> 00:29:56,040 Speaker 3: But unfortunately that is all we have time for today. 611 00:29:56,320 --> 00:29:58,680 Speaker 3: So just before we head off, we'd like to acknowledge 612 00:29:58,680 --> 00:30:02,720 Speaker 3: and pay respects t Aboriginal and Torres Straight Island of People's. 613 00:30:02,960 --> 00:30:05,880 Speaker 3: They're the traditional custodians of the lands, the waterways and 614 00:30:05,920 --> 00:30:09,120 Speaker 3: the skies all across Australia. We thank you for sharing, 615 00:30:09,280 --> 00:30:11,400 Speaker 3: for caring for the land on which we are able 616 00:30:11,440 --> 00:30:14,440 Speaker 3: to learn. We pay our respects to elders past and present, 617 00:30:14,480 --> 00:30:16,760 Speaker 3: and we share our friendship and our kindness. 618 00:30:17,120 --> 00:30:19,680 Speaker 2: The advice shared on She's on the Money is generally 619 00:30:19,800 --> 00:30:23,440 Speaker 2: nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's on 620 00:30:23,480 --> 00:30:26,760 Speaker 2: the money exists purely for educational purposes and should not 621 00:30:26,800 --> 00:30:29,880 Speaker 2: be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision. 622 00:30:30,320 --> 00:30:34,600 Speaker 2: We've promised Victoria Devine is an authorized representative of Australia 623 00:30:34,640 --> 00:30:38,760 Speaker 2: Pacific Funds Management Proprietary Limited ABN three four one three 624 00:30:38,840 --> 00:30:42,240 Speaker 2: two four six three two five seven AFSL three three 625 00:30:42,320 --> 00:30:44,920 Speaker 2: nine one five to one. And if anything in today's 626 00:30:44,920 --> 00:30:47,280 Speaker 2: episode brought anything up and you need to talk to someone, 627 00:30:47,320 --> 00:30:49,760 Speaker 2: you can always contact our friends at one eight hundred 628 00:30:49,760 --> 00:30:52,560 Speaker 2: respect and I'll pop their website in the show notes below. 629 00:30:52,720 --> 00:30:54,880 Speaker 3: And if you want to speak to a financial counselor, 630 00:30:55,000 --> 00:30:57,400 Speaker 3: you can contact our friends at the National Debt Helpline 631 00:30:57,440 --> 00:31:00,080 Speaker 3: on one eight hundred double oh seven, double seven, And 632 00:31:00,160 --> 00:31:03,560 Speaker 3: don't forget that is literally a free hotline that is 633 00:31:03,600 --> 00:31:06,640 Speaker 3: open Monday to Friday. So if you need them, please 634 00:31:06,720 --> 00:31:09,160 Speaker 3: reach out because they are some of the most genuinely 635 00:31:09,240 --> 00:31:12,479 Speaker 3: kind people I have ever come across. And with that, 636 00:31:12,720 --> 00:31:15,200 Speaker 3: we will see you next week guys for another money 637 00:31:15,320 --> 00:31:17,360 Speaker 3: Day with our friend Toni Lodge By