1 00:00:05,880 --> 00:00:09,200 Speaker 1: How how how how do you get your kids involved 2 00:00:09,720 --> 00:00:12,400 Speaker 1: in household chores? There's a whole bunch of ways to 3 00:00:12,480 --> 00:00:15,600 Speaker 1: do it today. The one thing that Kylie and I 4 00:00:15,600 --> 00:00:19,600 Speaker 1: think will make the biggest difference this is The Happy 5 00:00:19,600 --> 00:00:22,759 Speaker 1: Family's podcast, Real Parenting Solutions, every day on Australa's most 6 00:00:22,760 --> 00:00:25,599 Speaker 1: downloaded parenting podcast. We are Justin and Kylle coolswhere, the 7 00:00:25,600 --> 00:00:28,080 Speaker 1: parents of six kids. I'm the co host and parenting 8 00:00:28,120 --> 00:00:31,000 Speaker 1: expert on Channel nine's Parental Guidance, and today we're tackling 9 00:00:32,000 --> 00:00:35,479 Speaker 1: the chor chart and our advice. Even talking about the 10 00:00:35,560 --> 00:00:38,200 Speaker 1: chor chart feels like a chore. Kylie, our advice, one 11 00:00:38,240 --> 00:00:39,040 Speaker 1: slice of advice. 12 00:00:39,400 --> 00:00:42,360 Speaker 2: I was about to say, you're sounding a bit exasperated already. 13 00:00:42,600 --> 00:00:44,960 Speaker 1: Well, we've tried it. I don't want to sound like 14 00:00:44,960 --> 00:00:48,000 Speaker 1: we've tried everything and I'm exasperated. But we've got six kids. 15 00:00:48,000 --> 00:00:50,319 Speaker 1: We've been through this for the last twenty five years now, 16 00:00:50,360 --> 00:00:55,000 Speaker 1: and we have tried everything, and we just have one 17 00:00:55,040 --> 00:00:58,040 Speaker 1: piece of advice today, one piece of advice only. I'm 18 00:00:58,080 --> 00:00:59,400 Speaker 1: going to I'm not going to bury the lead. I'm 19 00:00:59,400 --> 00:01:03,280 Speaker 1: going to put it right up front. Make contribution fun, 20 00:01:03,440 --> 00:01:05,920 Speaker 1: or at least make it meaningful and worthwhile. That's it. 21 00:01:06,000 --> 00:01:09,920 Speaker 1: That's the whole podcast. In one sentence, make contribution fun. 22 00:01:11,120 --> 00:01:12,920 Speaker 2: Here's the thing. Our kids don't want to feel like 23 00:01:12,959 --> 00:01:16,480 Speaker 2: our slaves, and the challenge we have is that, for 24 00:01:16,560 --> 00:01:18,880 Speaker 2: the most part, they have no idea what we get 25 00:01:18,959 --> 00:01:21,440 Speaker 2: up to all day every day. That's the whole story. 26 00:01:21,560 --> 00:01:24,840 Speaker 2: We are the slaves, but they don't know that. And 27 00:01:24,880 --> 00:01:26,959 Speaker 2: so when we ask them to do chores and they 28 00:01:27,000 --> 00:01:29,160 Speaker 2: see us sitting on our phone or lying down on 29 00:01:29,200 --> 00:01:32,000 Speaker 2: the bed reading a book, it feels sorry. 30 00:01:32,000 --> 00:01:35,320 Speaker 1: In what parallel university ealing. Maybe they see us on 31 00:01:35,319 --> 00:01:37,760 Speaker 1: our laptop or on our phone because we're responding to 32 00:01:37,760 --> 00:01:39,600 Speaker 1: an email or we're making a call. 33 00:01:39,640 --> 00:01:43,399 Speaker 2: We suggest collect that we will being leisurely. I'm just 34 00:01:43,480 --> 00:01:47,119 Speaker 2: saying their perception is we're just on a device, or 35 00:01:47,520 --> 00:01:50,680 Speaker 2: you know, we're kind of doing something that's not helping 36 00:01:51,360 --> 00:01:53,560 Speaker 2: in any way, shape or form to contribute to the family. 37 00:01:54,600 --> 00:01:56,560 Speaker 2: That they feel like they're being hard done by. 38 00:01:56,800 --> 00:01:59,840 Speaker 1: So there's a really fascinating bit of psychological work that's 39 00:01:59,880 --> 00:02:01,680 Speaker 1: been done over the years. The highlights that we're only 40 00:02:01,680 --> 00:02:03,800 Speaker 1: aware of what we're doing. It's very, very, very hard 41 00:02:03,800 --> 00:02:05,520 Speaker 1: to be aware of what other people are doing. And 42 00:02:05,560 --> 00:02:07,520 Speaker 1: so when you talk to husbands and wives and you 43 00:02:07,560 --> 00:02:11,360 Speaker 1: get them to estimate what percentage of the household load 44 00:02:11,400 --> 00:02:15,200 Speaker 1: their carrying. Let's say you talk about the cooking. The 45 00:02:15,280 --> 00:02:17,560 Speaker 1: husband will say, oh, yeah, I reckon, I do probably. 46 00:02:18,000 --> 00:02:19,280 Speaker 2: I don't know ninety five percent. 47 00:02:19,440 --> 00:02:21,280 Speaker 1: Oh I was going to say forty or forty five percent, 48 00:02:21,440 --> 00:02:24,320 Speaker 1: But mum will say I do ninety percent of the cooking. 49 00:02:24,480 --> 00:02:26,799 Speaker 1: That obviously adds up to more than one hundred and well, 50 00:02:26,800 --> 00:02:29,239 Speaker 1: that's one hundred and thirty percent. I think I don't 51 00:02:29,280 --> 00:02:31,800 Speaker 1: do live mass very well. And yet some nights no 52 00:02:31,840 --> 00:02:34,400 Speaker 1: one's cooking dinner and everyone sort of goes, well, what's 53 00:02:34,440 --> 00:02:37,480 Speaker 1: going or the cleaning or the washing or whatever. We're 54 00:02:37,600 --> 00:02:39,720 Speaker 1: so aware of what we're doing, and we really think 55 00:02:39,720 --> 00:02:43,440 Speaker 1: that we're doing it all. And kids are especially susceptible 56 00:02:43,480 --> 00:02:47,239 Speaker 1: to this particular bias. I just want to talk about 57 00:02:47,360 --> 00:02:48,880 Speaker 1: before we get into the whole make it fun thing. 58 00:02:48,880 --> 00:02:50,960 Speaker 1: I want to talk about why the chor chart doesn't work. 59 00:02:51,480 --> 00:02:53,200 Speaker 1: We've been through this so many times. We've had the 60 00:02:53,280 --> 00:02:54,959 Speaker 1: choor charts up on the wall, we've had them on 61 00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:57,840 Speaker 1: the fridge. Sometimes we've tied its pocket money, which has 62 00:02:57,840 --> 00:02:58,680 Speaker 1: been disastrous. 63 00:02:59,240 --> 00:03:02,760 Speaker 2: It actually just makes our lives harder pretty much. We 64 00:03:02,960 --> 00:03:06,720 Speaker 2: have to be keeping them accountable and every step of 65 00:03:06,720 --> 00:03:08,520 Speaker 2: the way, and if you don't, then there's no point 66 00:03:08,600 --> 00:03:09,000 Speaker 2: having it. 67 00:03:09,000 --> 00:03:11,440 Speaker 1: Up correct And then when you start to keep the 68 00:03:11,520 --> 00:03:13,840 Speaker 1: kids accountable, they haven't done the chore because what chores 69 00:03:13,840 --> 00:03:17,000 Speaker 1: sound like hard work. Chores are definitely not fun. There 70 00:03:17,040 --> 00:03:18,280 Speaker 1: are other things that they'd like to do. 71 00:03:18,360 --> 00:03:19,639 Speaker 2: So your friends get paid if they do. 72 00:03:19,760 --> 00:03:23,840 Speaker 1: True, whatever happens, the kids begin with the conflict. The 73 00:03:23,919 --> 00:03:28,040 Speaker 1: resistance force creates resistance, and chore charts are a form 74 00:03:28,160 --> 00:03:33,760 Speaker 1: of I'm going to say, do kids need to contribute? Absolutely? Yes. 75 00:03:34,040 --> 00:03:35,440 Speaker 1: Do you think that they should be allowed to get 76 00:03:35,480 --> 00:03:38,760 Speaker 1: away with not participating at all? No way, Jose. They 77 00:03:38,800 --> 00:03:43,480 Speaker 1: absolutely need to contribute. But chore charts are a specific 78 00:03:43,560 --> 00:03:47,360 Speaker 1: and unfortunate form of torture. It just makes things super 79 00:03:47,360 --> 00:03:50,560 Speaker 1: super hard. So we're not big on chor charts. We're 80 00:03:50,600 --> 00:03:53,680 Speaker 1: also not big on paying the kids for chores. 81 00:03:53,480 --> 00:03:57,360 Speaker 2: Unless we believe in slave labor, because we believe in contribution, 82 00:03:58,080 --> 00:04:01,320 Speaker 2: unless they're big tasks that go beyond the ordinary cleaning 83 00:04:01,320 --> 00:04:03,400 Speaker 2: the dishes or hanging the washing or tidy in your room. 84 00:04:04,160 --> 00:04:07,680 Speaker 1: But let's go through some ideas to make chores. I 85 00:04:07,680 --> 00:04:09,200 Speaker 1: don't even like the word chores, like I said, but 86 00:04:09,280 --> 00:04:13,240 Speaker 1: let's go through some some ideas to make chores and 87 00:04:13,240 --> 00:04:15,680 Speaker 1: contribution and having responsibility in the home fun. 88 00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:18,680 Speaker 2: The first one's my favorite, yeah, and we've had so 89 00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:20,640 Speaker 2: much success with this over the years. We still do 90 00:04:20,680 --> 00:04:23,080 Speaker 2: it with our teenage and adults children when they're in 91 00:04:23,080 --> 00:04:25,880 Speaker 2: the house. It's called the ten minute tidy. Yeah, ten 92 00:04:25,880 --> 00:04:26,520 Speaker 2: minute tidy. 93 00:04:26,920 --> 00:04:29,760 Speaker 1: That's exactly what it sounds like, that ten minutes of tidy. 94 00:04:30,160 --> 00:04:32,480 Speaker 2: But we love music in our home, and so we 95 00:04:32,600 --> 00:04:36,320 Speaker 2: utilize music to keep every body motivated. So three of 96 00:04:36,360 --> 00:04:39,440 Speaker 2: your favorite songs, pump them up really loud, and it's 97 00:04:39,440 --> 00:04:41,600 Speaker 2: a race against the clock. Once the end of that 98 00:04:41,720 --> 00:04:47,160 Speaker 2: third song finishes, cleaning's done. So you're literally getting the 99 00:04:47,320 --> 00:04:50,400 Speaker 2: most important jobs done, and you're all doing it together. 100 00:04:50,600 --> 00:04:53,440 Speaker 1: If the kids are sneaky, they'll work out that three songs. 101 00:04:53,440 --> 00:04:55,520 Speaker 1: You can find some really short songs, so it's got 102 00:04:55,520 --> 00:04:58,839 Speaker 1: to be three standard length songs. Every how, dude, Every 103 00:04:58,839 --> 00:05:00,560 Speaker 1: now and again, I get a bit sneak, Yes, one 104 00:05:00,560 --> 00:05:03,120 Speaker 1: of my favorite long plays or something like that. But 105 00:05:04,360 --> 00:05:08,400 Speaker 1: here's the thing. You're all together. You've got a meaningful 106 00:05:08,800 --> 00:05:11,159 Speaker 1: joint agreed upon purpose, and you're going to get as 107 00:05:11,240 --> 00:05:13,000 Speaker 1: much done as you can in ten minutes, and then 108 00:05:13,080 --> 00:05:15,919 Speaker 1: you've got a definite stop time. It's really importantly on 109 00:05:16,120 --> 00:05:18,920 Speaker 1: the stop and I struggle with this sometimes I'm like, oh, 110 00:05:18,920 --> 00:05:20,720 Speaker 1: but if we just do another two minutes, we can 111 00:05:20,720 --> 00:05:24,160 Speaker 1: finish this and this, And that's what gets everyone upset. 112 00:05:24,279 --> 00:05:26,359 Speaker 2: You know, I've noticed you've been working really hard on it, 113 00:05:26,360 --> 00:05:28,160 Speaker 2: because the other day we were out doing our ten 114 00:05:28,160 --> 00:05:32,320 Speaker 2: minute weeding and we were so close. There was literally 115 00:05:32,560 --> 00:05:36,840 Speaker 2: one patch left right in the corner the entire part 116 00:05:36,920 --> 00:05:39,520 Speaker 2: of the garden that we've been working on, and you said, 117 00:05:39,680 --> 00:05:42,000 Speaker 2: we've done a ten minutes, let's walk away. And I 118 00:05:42,040 --> 00:05:43,560 Speaker 2: was struggling with it so much. 119 00:05:43,960 --> 00:05:45,479 Speaker 1: The weeds are still there because we've gone to a 120 00:05:45,480 --> 00:05:48,039 Speaker 1: different part of the guten. It's driving me crazy. But 121 00:05:48,080 --> 00:05:50,800 Speaker 1: it's a ten minute tidy and it's incredible what you 122 00:05:50,800 --> 00:05:54,120 Speaker 1: can accomplish when everyone's on board. Everyone's having fun, and 123 00:05:54,160 --> 00:05:58,120 Speaker 1: here's the key thing. It's about being together. The music's 124 00:05:58,160 --> 00:06:00,880 Speaker 1: cranking and everyone's just enjoyed doing the work. 125 00:06:01,360 --> 00:06:03,440 Speaker 2: So if you've got older kids and they are actually 126 00:06:03,800 --> 00:06:08,159 Speaker 2: happy to contribute, then you might even take away the 127 00:06:08,160 --> 00:06:11,560 Speaker 2: ten minute tidy. But the key is music. The key 128 00:06:11,760 --> 00:06:16,440 Speaker 2: is music. Our girls love playing different music games together 129 00:06:17,040 --> 00:06:19,360 Speaker 2: while they're cleaning, and they will sing at the top 130 00:06:19,400 --> 00:06:20,920 Speaker 2: of their lungs for half an hour. 131 00:06:21,120 --> 00:06:23,919 Speaker 1: Yeah, they play this game called word association, and they'll 132 00:06:23,920 --> 00:06:25,560 Speaker 1: literally just come up with the word and then they've 133 00:06:25,600 --> 00:06:26,600 Speaker 1: got to sing. 134 00:06:26,800 --> 00:06:28,800 Speaker 2: It might be love, or it might be travel, or 135 00:06:28,800 --> 00:06:31,400 Speaker 2: it might be breakup, or it might be boyfriend or 136 00:06:31,680 --> 00:06:33,160 Speaker 2: any number of names. 137 00:06:33,240 --> 00:06:35,320 Speaker 1: Yeah. The other day we did dreams, and there are 138 00:06:35,360 --> 00:06:38,200 Speaker 1: so many great songs with the word dream in that 139 00:06:39,279 --> 00:06:40,720 Speaker 1: I join in the games, like I want to stay 140 00:06:40,720 --> 00:06:42,279 Speaker 1: in the kitchen and keep on cleaning so we can 141 00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:43,800 Speaker 1: keep the game going. And I love playing the game 142 00:06:43,839 --> 00:06:45,720 Speaker 1: because I love music and I know so many songs. Gol. 143 00:06:45,720 --> 00:06:47,520 Speaker 1: There has to be radio antcess. I always win the game. 144 00:06:47,560 --> 00:06:50,039 Speaker 1: We Actually I don't anymore. This is the annoying thing. 145 00:06:50,080 --> 00:06:52,479 Speaker 1: They're getting too good at it, and they're prepping. I 146 00:06:52,480 --> 00:06:55,080 Speaker 1: think they're they're great. I think they're doing homework before, 147 00:06:56,200 --> 00:06:58,400 Speaker 1: like they're like, let's do this word because we've just 148 00:06:58,440 --> 00:07:03,160 Speaker 1: googled four hundred songs with that. Anyway, togetherness music and 149 00:07:04,000 --> 00:07:07,000 Speaker 1: playing games, so I guess that's sort of that's two 150 00:07:07,040 --> 00:07:09,520 Speaker 1: maybe three ways that you can make it fun after 151 00:07:09,520 --> 00:07:11,320 Speaker 1: the break. Another couple of ways that you can make 152 00:07:11,520 --> 00:07:15,680 Speaker 1: chores fun so that the kids are desperate, are dying 153 00:07:16,400 --> 00:07:17,960 Speaker 1: to get in there and help you to make the 154 00:07:17,960 --> 00:07:26,600 Speaker 1: house clean and to get stuff done. A slice of 155 00:07:26,640 --> 00:07:30,320 Speaker 1: advice today on how we can make contribution fun or meaningful, 156 00:07:30,400 --> 00:07:32,560 Speaker 1: because our kids don't want to feel like our slaves, 157 00:07:32,600 --> 00:07:35,520 Speaker 1: but they do need to contribute and participate in making 158 00:07:35,560 --> 00:07:37,400 Speaker 1: the house function and work. 159 00:07:38,120 --> 00:07:41,080 Speaker 2: Our next one is make it a race. So we've 160 00:07:41,080 --> 00:07:44,280 Speaker 2: talked about racing against the music, but now we're actually 161 00:07:44,360 --> 00:07:45,560 Speaker 2: racing against each other. 162 00:07:45,600 --> 00:07:48,880 Speaker 1: And if our girls, they're a little bit competitive, but 163 00:07:48,920 --> 00:07:52,760 Speaker 1: if you have boys, my goodness, my goodness, they'll just 164 00:07:52,920 --> 00:07:55,320 Speaker 1: eat this up. Here's the problem when you make it 165 00:07:55,360 --> 00:07:58,200 Speaker 1: a race. The quality of the workmanship is not always 166 00:07:58,280 --> 00:08:01,080 Speaker 1: quite where you need it to be. The dishes might 167 00:08:01,120 --> 00:08:04,080 Speaker 1: not be exactly clean, the lawn might have some long 168 00:08:04,120 --> 00:08:07,680 Speaker 1: patches that were missed. The garden might still have all 169 00:08:07,720 --> 00:08:09,840 Speaker 1: of the roots in because they just rip the top 170 00:08:09,840 --> 00:08:12,640 Speaker 1: off the weeds. So make it a raise comes with risks. 171 00:08:13,120 --> 00:08:15,400 Speaker 2: With everything, you need to have some kind of ground rules. 172 00:08:15,440 --> 00:08:17,440 Speaker 2: And so if you're going to go with let's make 173 00:08:17,480 --> 00:08:20,160 Speaker 2: it a race and give everybody their own space to 174 00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:23,520 Speaker 2: work with. You need to obviously acknowledge that then there's 175 00:08:23,560 --> 00:08:28,080 Speaker 2: a minimum quality that's required in order for this to 176 00:08:28,160 --> 00:08:28,760 Speaker 2: actually work. 177 00:08:28,880 --> 00:08:31,080 Speaker 1: Yeah, it's kind of like I'll race you to brush 178 00:08:31,160 --> 00:08:34,200 Speaker 1: our teeth. We each have to do it for two minutes. 179 00:08:34,280 --> 00:08:39,720 Speaker 1: Ready set, God, it doesn't work, and yet it's still fun. 180 00:08:39,840 --> 00:08:43,000 Speaker 1: So there's that one. I guess another way of building 181 00:08:43,040 --> 00:08:44,280 Speaker 1: it up is just having I. 182 00:08:44,280 --> 00:08:46,040 Speaker 2: Can get the toothbrush in my mouth faster than you. 183 00:08:46,320 --> 00:08:50,120 Speaker 1: Having fun with something like a mission impossible. So this 184 00:08:50,200 --> 00:08:52,040 Speaker 1: is where you give the kids a challenge and you say, 185 00:08:52,360 --> 00:08:55,160 Speaker 1: I think this one is a mission impossible task for you, 186 00:08:55,960 --> 00:08:58,800 Speaker 1: but I'd be really interested to see how you go 187 00:09:00,200 --> 00:09:03,200 Speaker 1: every single one of these. It makes it fun. But 188 00:09:03,240 --> 00:09:04,680 Speaker 1: you know what makes it the most fun, you know, 189 00:09:04,679 --> 00:09:06,240 Speaker 1: the thing that they all have in common. 190 00:09:06,679 --> 00:09:07,280 Speaker 2: We're together. 191 00:09:07,679 --> 00:09:13,400 Speaker 1: It's togetherness. Yeah, it's about involvement. There was a weekend 192 00:09:13,480 --> 00:09:15,240 Speaker 1: one time when I was out raking some leaves in 193 00:09:15,280 --> 00:09:18,280 Speaker 1: the garden and I just thought, the kids are sitting 194 00:09:18,320 --> 00:09:20,640 Speaker 1: on their backsides doing nothing. They can come out and help. 195 00:09:20,760 --> 00:09:23,319 Speaker 1: I'm working so hard for this family and this just 196 00:09:23,360 --> 00:09:25,480 Speaker 1: doesn't seem right, doesn't seem fair. So I walked into 197 00:09:25,520 --> 00:09:27,800 Speaker 1: the house and I called out to Emily and Lily, 198 00:09:28,160 --> 00:09:30,320 Speaker 1: our thirteen year old and nine year old at the time, 199 00:09:30,559 --> 00:09:32,360 Speaker 1: and I said, girls, come and help me rak some leaves. 200 00:09:32,400 --> 00:09:34,520 Speaker 1: I'd really love your help. And they both looked at me, 201 00:09:34,600 --> 00:09:37,440 Speaker 1: rolled their eyes and said we hate wreaking leaves, which 202 00:09:37,480 --> 00:09:38,920 Speaker 1: was really funny because they've never done it and they 203 00:09:38,960 --> 00:09:42,160 Speaker 1: wouldn't know. I just shrugged and said, I'd love your help, 204 00:09:42,360 --> 00:09:44,199 Speaker 1: and I think it would be appropriate that you come 205 00:09:44,200 --> 00:09:47,400 Speaker 1: and give me a hand. It's contribution time. I'll be 206 00:09:47,480 --> 00:09:49,800 Speaker 1: outside in the garden waiting for you, and I turned 207 00:09:49,800 --> 00:09:52,040 Speaker 1: around and walked out. Now fortunately they were not watching 208 00:09:52,040 --> 00:09:53,800 Speaker 1: a screen. Had they been watching a screen, I would 209 00:09:53,840 --> 00:09:55,760 Speaker 1: have lost them, but they were doing something else, and 210 00:09:56,120 --> 00:10:01,120 Speaker 1: they did. They came out sullenly, almost unw willingly, and 211 00:10:01,160 --> 00:10:03,160 Speaker 1: as I raked the leaves, they got involved in picking 212 00:10:03,200 --> 00:10:05,360 Speaker 1: up the leaves putting in the bin, and then Emily said, 213 00:10:05,400 --> 00:10:07,960 Speaker 1: can I please rake instead? And we ended up spending 214 00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:09,920 Speaker 1: instead of three or four minutes that I thought, we 215 00:10:09,920 --> 00:10:13,600 Speaker 1: would spend about twenty twenty five minutes doing a great 216 00:10:13,640 --> 00:10:16,480 Speaker 1: big garden tidy up because they were willing to be involved. 217 00:10:17,200 --> 00:10:19,360 Speaker 1: Did I make it fun, Yeah, a little bit, but 218 00:10:19,480 --> 00:10:22,760 Speaker 1: mostly we just spent the time together and that was 219 00:10:22,800 --> 00:10:26,439 Speaker 1: what it took to get them making a contribution. 220 00:10:26,679 --> 00:10:29,600 Speaker 2: Well, I did say earlier that you are working on 221 00:10:29,880 --> 00:10:30,920 Speaker 2: keeping to a time frame. 222 00:10:32,720 --> 00:10:35,600 Speaker 1: I'm working on it. That's our slice of advice. There 223 00:10:35,679 --> 00:10:37,840 Speaker 1: is one bonus idea that I want to throw in 224 00:10:37,880 --> 00:10:39,800 Speaker 1: though I know we're only supposed to share one slice 225 00:10:39,800 --> 00:10:41,959 Speaker 1: of advice, but we're making this a sandwich. There's two 226 00:10:42,000 --> 00:10:45,880 Speaker 1: pieces of bread in this advice sandwich. The bonus idea 227 00:10:45,960 --> 00:10:49,240 Speaker 1: is this. Chores is an outdated word. I think it's 228 00:10:49,240 --> 00:10:52,560 Speaker 1: an awful word. It's a word, as you highlighted at 229 00:10:52,559 --> 00:10:56,640 Speaker 1: the beginning, that makes you feel burdened. It feels like 230 00:10:56,720 --> 00:10:58,440 Speaker 1: this is not going to be fun. This is not 231 00:10:58,480 --> 00:11:00,480 Speaker 1: something that I would choose to do. This is something 232 00:11:00,520 --> 00:11:02,760 Speaker 1: that is being placed on my shoulders and I now 233 00:11:02,800 --> 00:11:05,920 Speaker 1: have to carry it. And I think we can do better. 234 00:11:06,840 --> 00:11:10,040 Speaker 1: Chores makes things sound like a chore. Now. I know 235 00:11:10,120 --> 00:11:11,880 Speaker 1: some people like the idea of saying, well, you've got 236 00:11:11,920 --> 00:11:13,840 Speaker 1: responsibilities for me. 237 00:11:14,200 --> 00:11:15,079 Speaker 2: That sounds heavy too. 238 00:11:15,520 --> 00:11:17,960 Speaker 1: I feel like that sounds heavy as well. Is it 239 00:11:18,000 --> 00:11:20,160 Speaker 1: true that there are chores in life? Yes? Is it 240 00:11:20,200 --> 00:11:22,400 Speaker 1: true that we have responsibilities in life. Yes, do we 241 00:11:22,440 --> 00:11:25,360 Speaker 1: need to protect our children from that reality? No? But 242 00:11:25,440 --> 00:11:27,520 Speaker 1: if I want my children to do something that is 243 00:11:27,640 --> 00:11:30,960 Speaker 1: just not that pleasant, I think the best way to 244 00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:33,600 Speaker 1: do it is to give them some autonomy and say 245 00:11:34,040 --> 00:11:36,240 Speaker 1: we're going to need some help in the next little while. 246 00:11:36,400 --> 00:11:39,640 Speaker 1: How would you like to contribute? Sometimes just giving them 247 00:11:39,640 --> 00:11:43,200 Speaker 1: the option. Sometimes just asking them how they would like 248 00:11:43,280 --> 00:11:46,720 Speaker 1: to contribute makes it feel like it's a their choice 249 00:11:46,800 --> 00:11:48,600 Speaker 1: and be a lot more fun than it would be 250 00:11:48,920 --> 00:11:51,400 Speaker 1: if we just told them what to do. So that 251 00:11:51,520 --> 00:11:56,040 Speaker 1: is our slice of advice on getting the kids tackling chores, 252 00:11:56,160 --> 00:11:57,960 Speaker 1: or perhaps a better way to say it is helping 253 00:11:58,000 --> 00:12:00,439 Speaker 1: the kids to make a contribution in the home. The 254 00:12:00,480 --> 00:12:03,839 Speaker 1: Happy Families podcast is produced by Justin Ruland from Bridge Media. 255 00:12:03,920 --> 00:12:06,120 Speaker 1: We love so much that you take time out of 256 00:12:06,120 --> 00:12:09,200 Speaker 1: your day to spend it with us and have a listen. 257 00:12:09,240 --> 00:12:11,160 Speaker 1: We hope you're adding value to your life. Thank you 258 00:12:11,280 --> 00:12:13,959 Speaker 1: so much for being a Happy Families listener. If you'd 259 00:12:14,000 --> 00:12:16,360 Speaker 1: like more info and more resources about how to make 260 00:12:16,360 --> 00:12:18,800 Speaker 1: your family happier, you can visit us for more at 261 00:12:18,800 --> 00:12:22,439 Speaker 1: happy families dot com dot au or check out Facebook 262 00:12:22,480 --> 00:12:26,400 Speaker 1: and Instagram, just search up doctor Justin Colson's happy families.